A Presentation for Parents by

Kris Hintz

Principal, Position U 4 College LLC

10 Things Parents Can Do For Your College-Bound 10th Grader

About Position U 4 College

• Position U 4 College LLC is a career coaching service that helps students and young adults optimally position themselves to colleges, graduate schools, and employers to create the future they want.

• Website: www.positionu4college.com for parents, high school students, college students and recent graduates. It describes my services and offers a resource center for recommended books and internet links.

• Parents of college-bound students! Check out collegeblog by kris hintz: www.positionu4college.wordpress.com

About Kris HintzPrincipal,

Position U 4 College LLC

• Kris Hintz offers expertise in marketing, psychology and career development to help young people discover and market their key strengths.

• Kris has12 years of executive experience in marketing, advertising, research

and recruiting with Nabisco, Coca Cola, Quaker Oats and Clorox.

• Kris holds a Masters in Organizational, Counseling & Social Psychology from Teachers College of Columbia University (1996), focusing on Career Development. Kris earned an MBA in Marketing from The Wharton School (1980) and a BA in Psychology from University of Pennsylvania (1978), focusing on Child Development.

• Kris is studying with the Institute for Life Coach Training and is a member of the Professional Association of Resume Writers and Career Coaches. She is currently enrolled in the UCLA Extension College Counseling Certification Program Online.

Your child’s a sophomore in high school…

• You’ve always made sure your child focused on academics.

• Your school’s guidance department has made sure your student is enrolled in a strong sequence of college prep courses.

• You’ve been saving for college with good input from your financial advisor.

• NOW WHAT?

The idea is: Prepare without a fuss, but prepare.

• DON’T …create fanfare around college preparation.

• Your child is too busy living the teen years to focus on college yet.

• Heavy discussion will fall on deaf ears, burn out the topic, and create rebellious backlash later when it really matters.

• DO …create a supportive structure that quietly keeps your child on track for the college process.

• Build low-key college awareness.

• Maintain a positive, open dialogue with your child.

So here are 10 things you can do!

1. Prevent Transcript Disasters.

• Your child doesn’t need a “perfect” GPA, but avoid RED FLAGS.

• Get extra-help EARLIER rather than later (from teachers, student tutors, or paid tutors). It should be a first resort, not a LAST RESORT!

• One-on-one tutoring is a time-honored, effective learning method, especially helpful in nipping systematic errors in the bud. Don’t let your child feel embarrassed about going for help!

• If it comes down to a choice between grades and a time-consuming extra-curricular activity, CHOOSE GRADES.

• A “C” grade in one marking period is not a catastrophe. But help do DAMAGE CONTROL so that does not become the ANNUAL GRADE.

2. Scout for activities and summer programs to help your student explore interests.

• Self-discovery is an adolescent’s #1 DEVELOPMENTAL TASK!

• Extra-curricular and summer programs (academic, wilderness, arts, sports, travel, service) give teens a chance to explore an untapped interest area.

• Benefits are two-fold: Help your child discover his or her identity and build a portfolio of experience in high-interest areas.

• Don’t say, “This is good for college.” That’s obvious. More importantly, it’s good for your kid!

3. Encourage your child to seek challenge in academic areas of strength.

• A student need not take all AP or Honors courses, but encourage your child to take advanced courses in subjects in which he or she excels.

• This approach will aid self-discovery, maintain stimulation, prevent boredom, balance challenge and stress, and build an authentic positioning for college highlighting the student’s academic strengths.

• A realistic portfolio of advanced & regular courses will teach your child how to succeed in college, by choosing a balanced load and optimally applying oneself in challenging courses.

4. Help your child seek depth vs. breadth in extra-curricular activities.

• 3 reasons for extra-curricular activities: to explore interests, develop commitment, and enjoy life through expression of one’s talents and passions.

• It’s about self-discovery, not getting into college. Colleges want a student who is a jack of a few trades and a master of one or two.

• Help your child “go deep” in a few areas he or she truly enjoys (go for leadership positions, awards, higher skill levels).

• Don’t let your teen get spread thin by superficial involvement in too many pursuits. Teach your child to prioritize and edit back superfluous activities, leading by example. A lesson many parents could benefit from learning ourselves!

• Make a FILEBOX… start collecting things that your kid would otherwise lose. Test results, transcripts, awards, sports results, community service hours, great essays.

• Don’t go crazy, don’t insist on your teen’s involvement, just quietly do it, so everything will be organized in one place next year when you need it.

• Culinary Institute of America calls it “mise en place” (everything in place)…ingredients ready so you’ve got them right there when you need them!

5. Provide clerical support!

6. If you visit a campus, make it part of a fun family trip….and low-key it.

• It is anxiety-producing for a teen to seriously consider the idea that high school will end …and he or she will be moving away from home.

• Teens live in “the NOW”… so college is unreal to most sophomores.

• But low-key exposure through a college tour can help students file away mental pictures of what an acceptable campus might look and feel like.

• That’s all you want right now!

7. Build a positive relationship with your child, and choose your battles carefully.

• White water rapids ahead! You will need goodwill to preserve a loving, constructive, honest relationship with your adolescent.

• “D” words--dating, drinking, drugs, driving and depression make it challenging enough. Don’t add premature college pressure to that stressful mix.

• You will experience the “perfect storm” when your adolescent’s normal, powerful drive for autonomy eventually collides with the college application process.

• PROTECT GOODWILL… You’re going to need it!

8. If you want to do “advanced recon” research on colleges that fit your child’s interests,

make it “stealth” research only. • Ley’s say your child is a performing

artist, and you want to gain awareness of colleges with strong music, dance or theater programs.

• Or--your teen has always dreamed of becoming an architect, and you want to identify schools offering that field of study.

• Great! Do research. It may be helpful later as a starting point when your child is ready to build a college list.

• Don’t share it now--that’s overkill! It’s too early for most teens to care, and they have other more immediate concerns as sophomores.

• File it away for later, but keep it to yourself!

9. Encourage your child to build relationships

with teachers, coaches and counselors. • Colleges prefer recommendations

from 11th grade teachers, but kids don’t automatically know how to build relationships with adults.

• Now is when your teen can learn not to hide in the back of the class!

• Encourage your child to participate in class, ask thoughtful questions, advocate respectfully if there is a problem, deliver on responsibilities, and gain the confidence of adult supervisors.

10. Support your child’s growth and development as a complete human being.

• Your child needs support for physical and mental health, getting enough sleep, eating right, and managing stress. Who is going to help if not Mom or Dad?

• Your child’s life needs to be enriched in higher dimensions: spiritual, ethical, aesthetic, social, emotional. You can help as a caring, involved adult guide who is not too invasive but “always there” as a sounding board.

• Keeping these priorities in sight will lead to a more satisfying relationship with your child, even after he or she eventually leaves home for that best-fit college.

Resources

BooksExtra-Curricular Guides• The 500 Best Ways for Teens to Spend the

Summer (Princeton Review)• Ultimate Guide to Summer Opportunities for

Teens (S. Berger)• Summer Programs for Kids & Teenagers

2009 (Petersons)

Advanced Recon College Research• Fiske Guide to Colleges 2009• The College Solution (L. O’Shaughnessy)• The Hidden Ivies (Greenes’ Guides)• The Public Ivies (Greenes’ Guides)• Colleges That Change Lives (L. Pope)• Creative Colleges (E. Loveland)

Paying for College• Pay for College Without Sacrificing Your

Retirement (T. Higgins)

Internet LinksExtra-Curricular Guides• www.lead-america.org• www.gobroadreach.org• www.jkcp.com• www.interlochen.org• www.ussportscamps.com

Advanced Recon College Research• www.usatoday.com/news/education/2007-

11-04-nsse-how-to_N.htm• www.youniversitytv.com/beta/index.php• www.collegeboard.com• www.collegeconfidential.com• www.hundredsofheads.com• www.usnews.com/sections/rankings

Paying for College• www.kiplinger.com/tools/colleges/• www.finaid.org

For more resources: www.positionu4college.com