1119 1 b. inggeris 1 spm 2010

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1119/1 BAHASA INGGERIS 1 Bahasa Inggeris 1 Kupasan Mutu Jawapan SPM 2010 1 FORMAT OF THE QUESTION PAPER This paper consists of two sections - Section A and Section B. Candidates are required to answer questions in both sections. SECTION A (QUESTION 1) : DIRECTED WRITING In this section, candidates were required to write a response to a task in clear and accurate Standard English, using a style and tone appropriate to the task. For SPM 2010, the task required candidates to write an informal letter to a cousin who had been chosen to participate in the National Service Programme. Candidates had to encourage and persuade the cousin, who was worried about going, to take part in the programme. Based on the rubric, candidates were expected to convince the cousin by giving the benefits that could be gained by attending the programme. The total mark for this section was 35 marks. SECTION B (QUESTION 2) – CONTINUOUS WRITING This section tested writing skills. It tested candidates’ ability to produce a piece of continuous prose in accurate Standard English. It also tested the candidate's ability to respond relevantly and creatively to a task chosen from a number of alternatives. Candidates had to choose one of the 5 titles to write a composition of about 350 words in length. This section was allocated 50 marks. GENERAL PERFORMANCE Generally, candidates fared better in Section A (Directed Writing) than in Section B (Continuous Writing). However, only a small percentage managed to get into the top range. The majority belonged to the medium range. This shows a general weakness in the writing skills of the language in terms of errors made in the writing, variety in sentence structures, vocabulary used, organization and the subject matter of the answer. For Section B, a significant number of candidates performed rather badly. Many candidates were unable to write accurately to the extent that errors made were multiple in nature. A direct consequence was that meaning collapsed and the writing was rendered incomprehensible. Thus, communication was barely achieved. Only a small percentage of the candidates managed to get into the top band. Some candidates did not even attempt this section. However, looking at the overall achievement , the performance of the candidates was more positive, though it was still rather unsatisfactory.

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Page 1: 1119 1 b. inggeris 1 spm 2010

1119/1 BAHASA INGGERIS 1

Bahasa Inggeris 1 Kupasan Mutu Jawapan SPM 20101

FORMAT OF THE QUESTION PAPER

This paper consists of two sections - Section A and Section B. Candidates arerequired to answer questions in both sections.

SECTION A (QUESTION 1) : DIRECTED WRITING

In this section, candidates were required to write a response to a task in clearand accurate Standard English, using a style and tone appropriate to the task.For SPM 2010, the task required candidates to write an informal letter to a cousinwho had been chosen to participate in the National Service Programme.Candidates had to encourage and persuade the cousin, who was worried aboutgoing, to take part in the programme. Based on the rubric, candidates wereexpected to convince the cousin by giving the benefits that could be gained byattending the programme. The total mark for this section was 35 marks.

SECTION B (QUESTION 2) – CONTINUOUS WRITING

This section tested writing skills. It tested candidates’ ability to produce a piece ofcontinuous prose in accurate Standard English. It also tested the candidate'sability to respond relevantly and creatively to a task chosen from a number ofalternatives. Candidates had to choose one of the 5 titles to write a compositionof about 350 words in length. This section was allocated 50 marks.

GENERAL PERFORMANCE

Generally, candidates fared better in Section A (Directed Writing) than in SectionB (Continuous Writing). However, only a small percentage managed to get intothe top range. The majority belonged to the medium range. This shows a generalweakness in the writing skills of the language in terms of errors made in thewriting, variety in sentence structures, vocabulary used, organization and thesubject matter of the answer.

For Section B, a significant number of candidates performed rather badly. Manycandidates were unable to write accurately to the extent that errors made weremultiple in nature. A direct consequence was that meaning collapsed and thewriting was rendered incomprehensible. Thus, communication was barelyachieved. Only a small percentage of the candidates managed to get into the topband. Some candidates did not even attempt this section.

However, looking at the overall achievement , the performance of the candidateswas more positive, though it was still rather unsatisfactory.

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GENERAL PERFORMANCE OF CANDIDATES ACCORDING TO THEIRGROUPS

Candidates who scored high marks displayed very good linguistic ability andwere able to address the task accurately and clearly. Few grammatical mistakeswere made and a flair for the language was shown. Vocabulary was precise andvaried. Varied sentence types and structures were employed to achieve intendedeffect. The writing was coherent with appropriate use of punctuation andparagraphing. An appropriate tone was also employed.

Candidates with average performance understood the task before them butlacked the linguistic ability to write effectively. They were unable to sustainaccuracy throughout. Vocabulary was limited and sentence structures repetitive.Answers generally displayed a lack of organization and coherence.

Candidates who scored low marks lacked the language competence and gaveSections A and B the minimal treatment. There was a high density of seriouserrors which caused blurring in meaning and in some places, meaning washardly comprehensible. In extreme cases, candidates merely copied the rubric ordid not attempt the question. However, Section A did offer some opportunity forthe candidates to answer because some guidance/ points/ key words wereprovided.

The rest of the report will provide details on the performance of candidates in theabove three groups. Authentic responses are used (errors included) to giveteachers and students an insight into the finer points of what a good answershould be like as well as some of the pitfalls to avoid. This can be realized bylooking at the strengths and weaknesses of the candidates. Somerecommendations for teachers and students are provided at the end of eachsection.

SECTION A : DIRECTED WRITING

Performance of candidates in Section A and mistakes made

General performance of candidates was analyzed based on three ability groups:good, average and weak. Examples of responses in these three categories aregiven in a later section.

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Group (a) : Good

Candidates in this group fulfilled the assessment objectives. The correct formatwas used. Candidates wrote in clear, accurate standard English with a widevocabulary. They were competent in paragraphing, spelling, punctuation, andwere able to use cohesive and logical devices to link sentences. Ideas were well-developed and the response had appropriate tone and style.

Group (b) : Average

The candidates in this group did comprehend the rubric and showedunderstanding of the requirements of the task. Content points were easilylocated, with most candidates scoring quite well. Response showed competencein the language. The correct format was used but the writing lacked accuracy.Ideas were adequately developed but were at times disorganized. Sentencestructures lacked variety resulting in a monotonous piece of writing. Most of theerrors were single word errors.

Group (c) : Weak

For candidates of this group, format might be completely missing or incorrect.Responses were not organized. There were hardly any accurate sentences.Ideas were less developed or undeveloped or lifted without proper context. Someresorted to stringing or use of words which they have little or no understandingof. However, some marks could still be awarded for content. Meaning was oftenblurred. There were serious and persistent errors in tenses, word choice and useand sentence structures. In very weak candidates, there was a predominant useof Bahasa Malaysia and interference from mother tongue. Some merely copiedthe questions.

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STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES OF THE CANDIDATES

EXAMPLE OF AN EXCELLENT ANSWER

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GENERAL COMMENTS

On the whole this letter is purposeful and convincing. It is consistently on taskand the message is clear and effective. Ideas are well-linked. An excellent pieceof writing! The candidate is confident and ambitious. He is also able to includesome informal expressions into the letter. This was done by the use of phrasalverbs, exclamations, imperatives and question tags which function asencouragement. A few examples are given below:

Are you not geared up...? Wouldn’t Aunt May be proud of you....John! Don’t forget to send me some photos of you looking smart, suave and

handsome....! You will get the ...through this programme, too!

STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES OF THE CANDIDATE

Examples of strengths and weaknesses are taken from the candidate’sresponse.

STRENGTHS

1. Candidate is able to provide the proper format for a letter. There is an

address, a title, a proper salutation to a cousin and the name/signature of

the writer is given as the closure.

2. Candidate is able to include all the content points in the letter based on thequestion.

3. Sentence structure is varied and sophisticated showing candidate’s abilityto use sentence length and type to achieve an intended effect.

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4. Vocabulary is wide and used with precision. Expressions are usedeffectively and with the desired effect.- instilling sense of patriotism (para 2)- many pitfalls (para 2);- geared-up (para 3);- couch potatoes (para 4)- lap of luxury (para 4)- omnipresent slaves (para 4)- transcend the barriers (para 5)- diverse cultures (para 6)- tailor-made (para 6)- enlightened (para 6)- suave (para 6)

5. Ideas and arguments are effectively-linked. Paragraphs are well-planned,have unity and are appropriately linked.- Apart from that…- Another aim….- Thus,…- Therefore….- This will..- To top it all off

6. On the whole, punctuation is accurate and helpful to the reader.Correct use of : Commas, Dash hyphen Exclamation marks

7. Spelling is accurate across the full range of vocabulary used, especiallywith low frequency words

- globalisation- strategically- diverse- enlightened- definitely- privilege- inculcate- couch potatoes- transcend- barriers

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8. The style and tone is appropriate – informal, persuasive, convincing andpolite. The reader is convinced that this could be a real letter to a cousin.

9. The topic is addressed with consistent relevance. The interest of the readeris aroused and sustained throughout the writing.

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WEAKNESSES

On the whole, the response is excellent and has only minor errors. Perhaps thetone of the letter could have been more informal.

1. In some parts, the letter tends to be a bit formal

2. Grammar

PrepositionOn (For) my part, I am indeed overjoyed for you.

Missing article:Another aim of this programme is to train the youth of today to be moreindependent.

Tense:The Present Perfect Tense needed:In your letter, you expressed your worry for being chosen to take partin the 2011 batch National Service Programme( for being chosen forhaving been chosen)

3, Spelling

- skeptical (sceptical)- fulfill (fulfil)

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EXAMPLE OF A FAIRLY GOOD ANSWER

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GENERAL COMMENTS

Performance of Candidate and mistakes made

This candidate has comprehended the rubric and has showed understanding ofthe requirements of the task. The candidate has used all the content points.Response shows competence in the language. The correct format is used butwriting lacks accuracy. Ideas are adequately developed but are at timesdisorganized. Sentence structures lack variety and the tone, though appropriate,lacks the persuasiveness and encouragement.

STRENGTHS

1. Candidate is able to provide an acceptable format for an informal letter.The address of the candidate is correctly written at the top right hand cornerof the page. This is followed by the date. Although there is no mark awardedfor the placing of the address and date, it should be recognised that thecandidate is sure about the format of an informal letter.The letter begins with a salutation and a greeting, which is the second aspectof the format. The candidate has concluded the letter with a signature.

2 Candidate writes on all the points given and scored the maximum marks forcontent.

3 Although language proficiency may be lacking in the candidate, there is anattempt to include complex sentences.

4 Paragraphs are fairly well-organised with proper use of linkers. There isevidence of some planning in the paragraphs with a clear concludingparagraph.

- Besides that, there are also a lot of exciting activities such as flying fox,kayaking, jungle trekking, visiting old folks home and others. (Opening of3rd paragraph)

- I think thats all for now. (Concluding paragraph)

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5 On the whole, punctuation is well used. Full stops, commas, question marksand even exclamation marks are used correctly.

- How are you?- Your mother said that you are worried about going there. Is that so?- Moreover, you will learn survival skills and you will have the chance to use

a rifle!

6 Spelling is generally accurate

- programme, congratulations, furthermore, personalities, independent,nowadays

7 Candidate is definitely on task, being able to fulfil the task of writing aninformal letter to a cousin. There was no mere mention of any point. All thepoints that were given were well elaborated.

WEAKNESSES

1 The candidate’s lack of proficiency in the language is reflected in the numberof errors of various kinds made. There is clumsiness at certain places.- Connector/conjunction/clause marker:

It has been so long that… I have (1st para)

- Tenses… since you never live … (3rd para)…have to be discipline… (5th para)…I have not write… (1st para)

- Agreement...if one of you make a mistake…(4th para)

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- Singular/Plural…for their own need …(4th para)…the physical trainings…(5th para)

- Article…everyone knows as the strict person…(5th para)…you have to face the punishment…(4th para)

- OmissionActually, there are a lot of benefits at that programme that you do notknow (about)…(1st para)You can develop good habits such as helping people, (being) confident…(2nd para)

- Clumsiness in structure

2 Punctuation

- Missing apostrophe- …old folks homes (3rd para)- …I think thats all for now (6th para)

3 It appears clearly that the candidate is merely elaborating the given points.The tone is neither encouraging nor persuasive. There is no attempt toconsole the worried cousin. The concluding paragraph does become a littlepersonal and friendly with the mention of the ‘allowances’ and the writer’shope that the cousin will enjoy the programme.

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EXAMPLE OF AN AVERAGE ANSWER

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DETAILED PERFORMANCE OF THE CANDIDATE

GENERAL COMMENTS

Candidate is definitely on task, being able to fulfil the task of writing a letter to acousin in a fairly satisfactory manner. However, the writing lacks ambition.

STRENGTHS1. Candidate is able to provide an acceptable format for an informal letter

to his cousin.

2 The candidate also manages to use almost all the content points

3. Paragraphs are fairly well-organised and the candidate is able to presentthe points in quite a systematic and coherent manner. There is evidenceof some planning in the paragraphs and a clear concluding paragraph.The candidate uses linkers quite successfully.

4. Spelling- wheather,- snokling,- lease

WEAKNESSES

1. Distortion arising from uncertainty in the language

2. Wrong tenses/Verb forms- I wrote this letter to you is ............- I wanted to encourage you to go there ...........- This programme can also developed....

3. Failure to differentiate between the active and passive voice‘ I was heard that you had been chosen…’

4. There is an attempt at informality in a letter as he realises that he is writing aletter to a cousin. However, the letter is not quite persuasive nor convincing.

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EXAMPLE OF A VERY WEAK ANSWER

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GENERAL COMMENTS

This candidate does not have the required linguistic skills. He is unable toelaborate on or express accurately the given points. This candidate gives thissection the minimal treatment. There is a high density of errors which causeblurring in meaning. The candidate is also unable to elaborate and therefore hasto rely heavily on the text given.

STRENGTHS

1. The response is written in paragraphs (4 paragraphs)

2. The letter is written in the correct format ( all elements are included )

3. The candidate manages to get almost all the content points

WEAKNESSES

1 The content points are written as how they appear joined with a few words ofhis own and this often causes blurring of meaning.The content points are strung together.- In they, you also can make new friends in they.- In they, you can learn leadership skill and responsibility.- You also can make a good discipline.- You can see different parts of Malaysia, be independent.

2 Due to heavy reliance on the text, the sentence structures are often mangled.

3 Direct translation from Bahasa Malaysia to English and mother tongueinterference- Repeated use of 'in they' indicates that the candidate is thinking in the

Malay language where 'in they' can be loosely translated to mean 'di situ- In they, I write stop in hear, bye- In they, you can also make some new friends in they.

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4 Wrong vocabulary- In the National Service Programme, you also can make a good

discipline.

5 Omission of verbs- you must ^ teamwork with your new members.

6 Spelling

- I write this lettel to tell you about the benefits of this programme.- …be indepedent- ….I write stop in hear, bye.- I hope you can to go they.

7 Omission of subjects- ^ learn some survival skill.

8 Subject – verb agreement

- ….she tell us you has been chose to take part in…..- I hope you can to go they.- They also have more exciting activities to training you.

9 The candidate uses neither topic sentences nor linkers to add clarity to thepresentation of content points.In the part of National Service Programme, you can develop good habits. Inthey, you also can make some new friends in they.

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SUGGESTIONS TO CANDIDATES

1. Read the instructions/rubric carefully before answering any question – besure of the task/format before writing. Read and underline the key words ortask that is required so that you do not forget to complete the task as youwrite the essay.

2. Use all the content points given in the rubric. Tick the content points youhave used to ensure that all the content points are in.

3. Use appropriate tone: be audience conscious.4. For good students, try to use sophisticated structures and precise

vocabulary. For average students, do not write long sentences because thetendency to make mistakes is higher.

5. Improve spelling – use a dictionary when necessary.6. Do not take punctuation lightly. Punctuation errors can be serious errors.7. Read a lot to improve general knowledge and vocabulary.

SUGGESTIONS TO TEACHERS

1. Teach students to identify key / task words.2. Teach students how to read the question and how to identify the main

content points.3. Teach students to write in different formats/layout like a letter or report so

that they are able to use the appropriate tone and register in the essay.4. Teach students to construct basic simple sentences.5. Remind the students to allocate the last 3 to 5 minutes for checking.6. Ensure students use Standard English.7. Remind the students to use all the content points given in the rubric.8. Devote more time to grammar and sentence construction so that the

students will be able to write grammatically correct and varied sentences.9. Train students to write a variety of sentence structures. Teach them how to

use the different types of structures appropriate to the tone required in thetask.

10. Encourage students to read widely.

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SECTION B (QUESTION 2) – CONTINUOUS WRITING

In this section, the candidates’ writing skills are tested. Its main objective is toassess the candidates’ ability to produce a piece of continuous prose in accurateStandard English. It also tests the candidates’ ability to respond relevantly andcreatively to a task chosen from a number of alternatives. As in each year, fiveinteresting topics are given and the candidate has to write a composition of about350 words on one of the topics. The candidates are advised to spend one houron this section and the mark allocated for it is 50.

GENERAL PERFORMANCE

Overall, candidates did not fare well in this section. The majority scored belowthe median while few belonged to the top range. This shows the weakness of thecandidates in the writing skills. Some candidates did not attempt this section.

GENERAL PERFORMANCE OF CANDIDATES ACCORDING TO THEIRGROUPS

Basically, the general performance of candidates was analysed based on threeability groups :

Candidates in the high achievement group :

This group showed a marked linguistic ability and creativity. They were able toproduce a relevant and creative piece of continuous prose. They also displayed agood flair for the language. The language used was entirely accurate and veryfew errors which were first draft slips or minor errors were made. Sophistication,maturity of thought, creativity and originality were clearly visible when they puttheir ideas and thoughts onto paper. Vocabulary and expressions were apt,precise, stimulating and inspiring. Paragraphs were well-planned and the topicwas addressed with consistent relevance. Ideas were well-organised, well-developed and coherent. Hence, the writing was able to arouse the reader’sinterest and it was sustained throughout.

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Candidates in the average achievement group :

The candidates in this group showed adequate understanding of the requirementof the task. Development of ideas lacked creativity, depth and maturity.Vocabulary lacked precision with a tendency to use repetitive words andstructures. This was mainly due to lack of linguistic ability to write effectively.They were not able to sustain accuracy throughout. Linguistic errors weresufficiently frequent and serious. The writing in this category often displayed alack of organization and coherence, making the composition uninteresting orlacking in liveliness and interest value.

Candidates in the low achievement group :

The candidates’ responses showed minimal understanding of the requirement ofthe task. They displayed poor linguistic ability. The lack of language competencysometimes resulted in minimal/partial treatment of the topic. Ideas were hardlydeveloped. The content might be comprehensible but high incidence of seriouserrors often made the meaning blur. In some cases, the word order and sentencestructures reflected mother tongue interference. As a result, the responses weredisoriented, disorganized and almost incomprehensible with frequent extendederrors which made reading the script difficult. In extreme cases, candidatesmerely copied all the 5 topics or the rubric from Directed Writing. Some did noteven attempt the question at all.

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EXAMPLE OF AN EXCELLENT ANSWER

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DETAILED PERFORMANCE OF THE CANDIDATE

GENERAL COMMENTS

The candidate is obviously a confident and competent writer, being able toexpress ideas clearly and effectively. He has been able to rise above the simpleand ordinary to a sophisticated level of writing, encompassing the nuances andidiomatic expressions peculiar to English and employing them to achieve theeffect they were intended for.

STRENGTHS

1 Candidate is able to provide an interesting, informative and strongargument of the use of internet in today’s world.

2 Sentence structure is varied and sophisticated showing the candidate’sproficiency in the language and the ability to use sentence length and type toachieve an intended effect

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3 Vocabulary is wide, sophisticated and used with precision- Its advent signifies a new epoch…;..an indomitable fact (para.1)- Accolades, inquisitive minds (para.2)- Warehouse, entertainment, unique feature, hustle-bustle of city life,

gasping, realm of wonderful of music and colours.(para3)- Painstakingly pen out letters, emergence of e-mail, feasible, halt the

power of the Internet, teleconferencing, procedure (para.4)- Voices of the grassroots, immensely laudable function (para.5)- Irresponsible, mete out punishments, offenders, eradicated (para.6)- Unauthorized, abscond (para.7)- Vengeful, slanderous, amplified, spread like wild fire, intense pressure,

mental trauma (para.8)- Aforementioned (para.9)

4 Paragraphs are well-planned, have unity and are appropriately linked,- In addition, (para.3)- Besides that, (para.4)- Moreover, (para.5)- On a more serious note, however, (para.6)- Besides, (para.7)- Finally, (para.8)- To wrap up, (para.9)

5 Punctuation is accurate and helpful to the reader- …to satisfy our young, inquisitive mind (para.2)- Plus, it helps us…quickly too! (para.2)- …made its popularity jump by leaps and bounds, not only among the

youth, but also the old. (para.3)- …gain access to the users’ bank accounts…(para.7)

6 Spelling is accurate across the full range of vocabulary used.- remarkable, epoch, indomitable, multitude, humble (para.1)- accolades, inquisitive, assignments (para.2)- warehouse, excellent source, unique feature, entertainment, hustle-

bustle, gasping, realm (para.3)- communication, painstakingly, pen out, emergence, halt, impressive,

teleconferencing, utilise (para.4)- networking, advent, grassroots, immensely, laudable function(para,5)- pornography, irresponsible, circulated, efficiency, mete out, eradicated

(para.6)- money-laundering, unauthorised, abscond,(para.7)- blackmail, cyber bullying, slanderous, bad-mouthing, amplified, trauma,

depression, intense (para.8)- irresponsible, spiteful (para.9)

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WEAKNESSES

1. An occasional slip – imprecise vocabulary- What is more impressive is that teleconferencing is also made feasible

presently.

2. Missing preposition - with- Moreover, the social networking sites in the Internet provide us with a

channel to make new friends and share our ideas

3. Slight flaw in use of verb-to-be : is.Besides, money-laundering on the Internet is also a serious problemrecently(More appropriate to use has become).

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EXAMPLE OF A FAIRLY GOOD ANSWER

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DETAILED PERFORMANCE OF THE CANDIDATE

GENERAL COMMENTS

On the whole the candidate is competent in the English Language. Thenarrartive is clear. The language is largely accurate as there are generally ratherfew errors, but the writing is somewhat lacking in ambition.

STRENGTHS

1 Simple structures are mainly accurate.

2 Sentences show some variety of compound and complex structures.Dialogues are used to give a better impact.

3 Vocabulary is wide enoughPara 1 - fatiguePara 2 - I scurriedPara 6 - ...my heart shattered into piecesPara 7 - I walked away in grief.Para 9 - … the alluring dress , … gasped

4 Overall, punctuation is accurate-“What is this?” I asked the old woman.

5 The composition is written in paragraphs which show some unity.

6 Interest is aroused at the beginning but the composition becomesmonotonous towards the end.

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WEAKNESSES

1 Errors in spelling,- “passangers” Para 3

2 Wrong tenses

3 Wrong preposition– in the train should be on the train– Dreaming to buy should be dreaming of buying

4 Wrong use of pronoun- where my feet had taken my should be where my feet had taken me

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EXAMPLE OF AN AVERAGE ANSWER

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DETAILED PERFORMANCE OF THE CANDIDATE

GENERAL COMMENTS

On the whole, the candidate has some basic command of the language and hehas attempted to make his story lively and interesting. It is a simple piece ofwriting both in terms of content and style. The story is quite well-organised asthe candidate’s flow of ideas can be seen in the events that followed logically.The subject matter does show some relevance to the topic given. The candidatesucceeds in his attempt to inject humour into his piece of writing albeit with someclumsy and awkward expressions.

The candidate is able to write a few accurate sentences but errors aresufficiently frequent as to hamper reading. However, the errors made are mainlysingle-word errors which can be easily corrected. The candidate can use simplestructures correctly but tends to make mistakes when complex structures areattempted. He is unable to maintain accuracy due to a lack of mastery of thelanguage and his limited vocabulary.

STRENGTHS

1. A number of accurate sentences can be seen in the script.- I was preoccupied with that examination. (Para 2)- I felt extreme pain. I thought my legs were broken. (Para 5 )

2. The candidate is able to use some good vocabulary.- blue azure sky and the chirping of the birds- preoccupied with that examination- my pair of legs had been amputated.- a disabled person- asked some money as compensation

3. Merit should also be given to the candidate for his style of writing. He isable to describe a series of short, quick actions of a snatch theft victim in away that enables the reader to picture vividly what is happening.

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4. Generally, the sentences are well punctuated. This candidate puts commaswhere most other candidates would have missed them out.- A few minutes later, my parents came to see my condition. (Para 5)- Like any weekend, …. (Para 1)- Suddenly, the big lorry … (Para 5)

5. Overall, the candidate tried his best to make his story more lively byinjecting humour into it.- We fought as gentlemen with bare hands …- We fought like cats and dogs.- I kicked him …. like Jackie Chan.- He loudly in pain until the flock of birds flew far away from the scene

WEAKNESSES

1. Errors in complex structures

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2. Clumsy, awkward expressions due to inappropriate/imprecise words used.

3. Inconsistency in the tense used.

4. Wrong use of prepositions- … the chirping of the birds added at the serenity to the ambience.

(Para 1 )- …. I took a big stone nearby and threw to the snatch thief.(Para 3)- Then, I fell of the road. (Para 5)

5 Omission of prepositions- While waiting / the public transports such as taxi, bus and others, ….

(Para 2)

6 Wrong use of articles- ….because I wanted to get the good result in the examination. (Para 1)- He loudly in pain until the flock of birds flew far away from the scene.

(Para 4)- Suddenly, the big lorry which was full of bricks was approaching at

great speed (Para 5 )

7 Wrong use of singular/plural nouns.- I felt my legs numb. (Para 5 ) Should be : I felt my legs were numb.- …. but it is never enough, to replace their son’s leg. (Para 6)

Should be : … but it would never be enough to replace their son’slegs.

8 Repetition of the same word due to limited vocabulary- He felt so pain. (Para 4 )- I felt extreme pain. (Para 5)- I felt my legs numb… (Para 5)- My parents felt very mad to the snatch thief … (Para 6 )- As fast as lightning’ - repeated twice. (Para 3 and Para 5)

9 Imprecise vocabulary used.- I felt sympathy instead of “sympathetic” (Para 4)- I used the concept of rugby instead of “technique” (Para 4)- I was nearly crashed by the big lorry instead of “crushed” (Para 5)

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- With any sense of human being ….(Para 4 )

10 There are a few minor spelling errors.- pedastrian, quarelling- …. when he wanted to puch my face.

11. Paragraphs lack unity. From the aspect of cohesion and coherence, thisscript can be further improved. There are hardly any linking words to linkevery paragraph or linkers within each paragraph.

12. PunctuationMissing full stop.- Suddenly, the big lorry which was full of bricks was approaching at

great speed was nearly crashed by the big lorry”. (Para 5)

Improper use of apostrophe- school’s gate

Error in sentence separation

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EXAMPLE OF A WEAK ANSWER

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DETAILED PERFORMANCE OF CANDIDATE

General Comments

This candidate has chosen to answer Topic 1 of Section B which is ‘Describe themost popular student in your school’. He has clearly misunderstood the topicwhich actually requires him to write about one student only i.e. the most popularone. He has instead written about 12 popular students with only one or twosentences to describe each student. Despite the numerous errors, it iscomprehensible but reading and re-reading is often necessary before meaningcomes through.

STRENGTHS

1. Has decent opening and closing paragraphs to tie everything up.Opening : I have many popular student in my schoolClosing : I very love my school and many popular student in my school.

Because have their, the school are healthy.

2. Punctuation is sometimes correct.- One day, we want go shopping with friend.

WEAKNESSES

1. There are numerous errors made by the candidate, displaying a lack ofunderstanding of some grammar items.Error in numbers

- many popular student- all the student

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Subject-verb agreement- he help his mother- She are hardworking

Articles- Mark is the rich man, but he is a good man- He is the hardworking student

Pronouns- Siti was quick to help she- she ambition is

2. There are a number of words used wrongly- fine him to help [find]- he make funny [fun]- Miki like to correct many coin [collect]- In her correcting [collection]

3. Spelling- anthor country [another]- We also got prefreck [prefect]- many good kes [case]- a love-coper [couple]

4. Commas are often used instead of full-stops.

5. Many sentences need to be restructured before meaning comes through.

6. Meaning collapses- Abu is the prifreck one man are discipline- She help the teacher to make many good kes in school.- she make many fun to our happy.

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SUGGESTIONS TO TEACHERS AND CANDIDATES

1. Teach students to plan before they start to write. Use mind-maps etc.

2. Incorporate different teaching strategies to teach writing especially for weakstudents e.g. parallel writing, paragraph writing, process writing.

3. Cultivate the reading habit to enrich their vocabulary and improve theircommand of the language.

4. Be encouraged to write the required number of words, as some wrote farshort of the required number of words.

5. Organize the essay in paragraphs.

6. Edit the essay after completing it.

7. More emphasis on grammar and spelling. Have sufficient grammar practice.

8. Journal writing could be a good way for students to express their ideas andby having more writing practice; they may not encounter writer’s block.

9. Correctional fluid/tape is not encouraged as writing can be smudged orwords omitted.

10. Remember to indicate the question number of your answer.

11. Listen to English songs or news.

12. Watch English documentaries.

13. Be more ambitious in terms of : variety of sentence structures. sophisticated and extended vocabulary. interesting expressions.