CHENNAIFRIDAY28 JULY 20172

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SUDOKU 3812(27.07.2017)

ANSWER TOSUDOKU 3812(27.07.2017)

The object is to insert the numbers in the boxes to satisfy only one condition: each

row, column and 3x3 box must contain the

digits 1 through 9 exactly once: Easy nah?

9 2 7 4 5 1 6 8 38 1 5 3 2 6 7 4 93 6 4 9 8 7 1 5 27 4 6 5 3 2 8 9 15 8 1 7 4 9 2 3 62 9 3 1 6 8 4 7 54 7 9 2 1 5 3 6 86 5 2 8 7 3 9 1 41 3 8 6 9 4 5 2 7

SSUUDDOOKKUU

38133813

4 5 2 7 31 3 9 4 6 2

1 2 43 8 7 5

4 8 7 29 5 4 2

6 7 88 2 6 1 5 3

5 3 6 8 1

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VIKRAM VEDHAKOOTATHIL ORUTHAN

Tech & Tracks

Lighter SideLighter Side

QUOTES OF THE DAY

Chennai, July 28: When we at Crank's News (Motto:

ha. ha. ha.) decided to do a satirical feature on the NEET examination this year, we checked out what were the recent developments in the issue and immediately found that we were up against a bigger adversary in matters of creating spoof, the government (Motto: Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha.)

For instance, one of the headlines that we came across while preparing for the piece was: "Medical aspirants gobble up engineering seats".

Surely, despite writing satire for a living --- which naturally means thinking up absolutely ludicrous, alternative, irresponsible scenarios --- we could not have come up with the above. And by god, the above is absolute reality and nothing imag-ined about it.

Lesson learnt: As long as there are governments and politicians, satire has to play second fi ddle to reality.

Despite this fact, we still decided to go ahead with the NEET feature, because we wanted to measure ourselves against the best in the business of being irresponsible and insensitive, the government.

Also: While the admission proce-dure via NEET is confusing enough, in Tamil Nadu we have further con-founded by taking the principled po-sition that nobody has any inkling of.

BUT HERE GOES: What is NEET?NEET, as should be obvious, is

the abbreviation of Never Explain or Enlighten in Tamil. Oops, sorry that would be the Central government's language policy.

National Engineering Entrance Test could also be a possible ex-pansion as at least in Tamil Nadu many of those who are hoping to become doctors and passed NEET have already enrolled themselves in some engineering college.

Potential doctors in engineer-

ing colleges? Why has this hap-pened?

The NEET results may have been out last month. But in Tamil Nadu they have not released the rank list till now because they suddenly realised NEET results fall under the Offi cial Secrets Act. So all those who wanted to become doctors are settling for the next best thing, which is to become extortionists or college owners.

Really? Okay, that would seem logical. And

anything connected with NEET is not logical. NEET rank list in TN is not out because the State does not want NEET and that is because the students don't want NEET.

Left to themselves, the students will not want any examination. Will the government oblige? That cannot be an argument, right?

Well, the government and the general public in TN feel that since the CBSE is in charge of NEET, as such CBSE students will have an advantage over Tamil Nadu State Board students. Of course, the op-tions before the State government were a) increase the quality of State Board education b) Prepare a cur-riculum that include NEET-type syl-labus that will at least help prepare the medical aspirants.

But the State government, backed by popular opinion, has opted for the third option, which is to seek total exemption from NEET.

How is NEET different from the previous All India medical en-

trance exam?Previously, there was plenty of

room for hanky-panky as private colleges were allowed to charge extra through capitation fee for man-agement quota seats. And medical seats went for, in some cases, for crores of rupees. Post-NEET, the

situation is totally...no wait, there is still room for capitation fee and management seats.

But NEET is good because every one is saying so.

Aside from Tamil Nadu, what is the stand of other States on NEET?

Almost all of them have accepted NEET because...they understand the point of NEET? No, a gun was pointed to their forehead.

No, not really. There has been murmurs of protest in places like West Bengal and Kerala based on the principled position that they are opposition governments and can-not be seen acceding to anything brought in by the ruling BJP at the Centre.

Does that mean that the opposi-tion to NEET is pointless?

NEET is managed by CBSE, and everybody knows that the CBSE has a good track record in handling

school education in this country for decades and a better experience in totally ruining it.

The different questions in different languages in NEET are a good case in point. Yes, for an all-India com-mon entrance exam the questions were not common. This institution is what is going to sit on judgment as to what our kids are capable of.

How have the courts approached the matter?

As ever, the courts, true to their tradition of impartiality, have kept everyone guessing, but provided, at every turn, plenty of things to laugh at.

When time is of essence as by now the admission process should have been over, we are still debat-ing whether we will have NEET or not. If the situation persists, this batch of medical students in Tamil Nadu will be the fi rst one in history to join the course with arrears. Se-riously, the college would seem to get going only next year.

You mean the courts have shown urgency in NEET matter?

That would be an unfair thing to say. The courts only yester-day, in a quick verdict in a matter pertaining to NEET, had totally struck down a possible DMK march against NEET.

So how do you think will things pan out?

Well, the High Court has already said that the State government should consider CBSE syllabus for all Tamil Nadu Board schools.

"Madras HC asks TN govt why all schools can't follow CBSE syl-labus."

This is an actual headline of a real report.

As we said at the beginning, we satirists have no chance against reality. We might as well give up just like, well, students who had aspired for medical college seats this year.

NEET: The pros, the cons, okay make it con

Every few years Shri Nitish Kumar takes oath as CM from a different alliance. It is quite a record. Straightforward political opportunism.

- CPI(M) general secretary, Sitaram Yechury

There has been good rainfall this season, but this fl ood has not happened because of rain ... This is a man-made fl ood. Bengal has been suffering every year during the monsoon. I think the Centre must carry out an immediate reform of DVC. I have been raising this

issue of water release by DVC since 2012. But no action has been taken. I cannot do anything more

than apologising to the people of my state. But I can assure them that the state government will help them as per its capacity. They do not have to worry about that.

- West Bengal Chief Minister, Mamata Banerjee

L e t m e share my own exper ience with you all here. When I was a very young kid, a lift-man once touched me inappropriate-ly. Since I had good communication with my parents, I told them about this incident. Parents and children must have a free interaction so that such offenders are identifi ed immediately.

- Actor Akshay Kumar