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Breakout Session # 204

Po Collins, CPCM, C.P.M., Fellow

Senior Manager, Contracts

Raytheon Company

24 April 2007

10:45 a.m.

Effective Business Communications

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“When I finished school, I took one of those career aptitude tests, and based on my verbal ability score, they suggested I become a mime.”

- Tim Cavanagh, Comedian

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The Case for Effective Communications

What Happens when You’re Misunderstood?• Answer more phone calls• Write more explanatory emails and letters• Make explanatory documents/white papers• Litigate

Effective communication means you will:• Write with more impact• Get better results• Provide better service

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Effective Communication in Today’s Changing World

• Plain Language

• Writing Pointers

• E-mail vs. phone

• Useful Web Sites

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The Benefits of Plain Language

• Reaches people who do not read well, or who do not have time to read well

• Helps all readers understand information

• Avoids misunderstanding and errors

• Saves time, because it gets the job done well the first time

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You Know You’ve Used Plain Language if…

Readers can:

• Find what they need

• Understand what they read

• Use what they read

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What Is Plain Language?

1. Write Like You Talk

2. Common words

3. Short sentences

4. Active voice

5. Easy-to-read layout

6. Logical organization

Writing Pointers:

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1. Write Like You Talk

• Use “you” and other pronouns

• Avoid artificial language

• Sound like yourself

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1. Write Like You Talk - Pronouns

Without pronouns:To establish eligibility for a grant, an applicant

must show that the applicant is a Native American and that the present housing of the applicant is substandard and inadequate.

With pronouns:To establish eligibility for a grant, you must show

that you are a Native American and that your present housing is substandard and inadequate.

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1. Write Like You Talk: CautionCaution

• Avoid regional dialects and expressions

• Use complete sentences

• Spoken English is sloppy

• Written English requires more care than spoken English

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2. Choose Common Words

“I never use a word like metropolis when I can get the same price for city.”

- Mark Twain

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2. Common Words

• Prefer the plain word to the fancy

• Use familiar words

• Avoid jargon

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2. Common Words:

Prefer the Plain Word to the Fancy • The front page of the Wall Street Journal is

written at the comprehension level of a seventh-grader

• Short, familiar words convey sharp, clear meanings

• Word length and difficulty are related• Never use a long word if a short word works

as well

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2. Common Words

Prefer the Plain Word to the Fancy Instead of:

accomplishascertainendeavorfacilitateformulateoptimumutilize

Use:dofind outtryhelpformbestuse

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2. Common Words

A Case for Short, Familiar Words:

• In the Lord’s Prayer, there are 66 words - 48 are of one syllable (72%)

• In “All the World’s a Stage” (Shakespeare’s As You Like It), there are 212 words - 150 are of one syllable (70%)

• In Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address, there are 268 words - 196 are of one syllable (73%)

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2. Common Words

Use familiar words

• Don’t camouflage words

• If Spell Check doesn’t like it, there’s a good reason

• Adapt your word choice to your reader

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2. Common Words

Use Picture Nouns and Action Verbs

• Select words with the right strength and vigor

• Select words for precise meanings

• Verbs are the strongest words, nouns are second

• Adjectives and adverbs are weak words

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2. Common Words: House

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2. Common Words

Noah Webster on the Precision of Words:

Webster’s wife caught him in the act of embracing the chambermaid.

“Noah,” she said, “I am surprised!”

Mr. Webster gazed upon her in mild reproof.

“No, my dear,” he replied, “you are amazed. It is we who are surprised.”

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2. Common Words

Avoid Jargon and Acronyms

• Acronyms and abbreviations must be defined

• Legal jargon is archaic

• Explain technical words

• Avoid trendy buzzwords

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3. Short Sentences

Cut Out Unnecessary Words

• Avoid cluttering phrases

• Cut out surplus words

• Avoid roundabout construction

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3. Short Sentences

Instead of:

At the present time

For the purpose of

In very few cases

With regard to

Use:

Now

For

Seldom

About

Cluttering phrases:

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3. Short Sentences

Cluttering phrases

Instead of:

It will be noted that the records for the past years show a steady increase in special appropriations.

Try this:

The records for past years show a steady increase in special appropriations.

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3. Short Sentences

Avoid roundabout construction

Instead of:Reference is made to your May 10 report in which you concluded that the warranty is worthless.

Try this:Your May 10 report concluded that the warranty is worthless.

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4. Active Voice

• It emphasizes the action

• It’s stronger and shorter than passive voice

– Avoid passive voice

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4. Active Voice

The test was performed.

or

ABC performed the test.

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4. Active Voice

When passive voice is appropriate:

• When you want to avoid accusing the reader

• When the performer of the action is not known

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5. Easy-to-Read Layout

Keep Paragraphs Short

• Use white space

• Separate topics into paragraphs

• Use lists and tables

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6. Logical Organization

• Know your audience

• Write to be understood

• Avoid ambiguity

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6. Logical Organization

Know Your Audience

• Write to everyone who is interested

• Engage your reader

• Anticipate the reader’s questions

• Organize to meet your reader’s needs

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6. Logical Organization

Write to be Understood - Not to Impress

• Don’t be arrogant

• Business communications should seek only to communicate

• Provide enough information for your reader to take action

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6. Logical Organization

Avoid Ambiguity

“I was confused by an ad that read: Why go elsewhere to be cheated! You can trust us to do the job.”

- Steve Strosser, “The Peter Plan”

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6. Logical Organization

Avoid Ambiguity

• Carefully place your words

• Don’t camouflage words

• Use clear pronouns

• Avoid double negatives

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6. Logical Organization

Avoid Ambiguity

Ambiguous Insurance Claim Statements

• The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

• I had been driving for 40 years, when I fell asleep causing the accident.

• In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.• I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble -

when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.

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Email vs. the Phone

Situation Email PhoneIs the communication sensitive or proprietary?

How important are emotions to the communication?

Do you need an immediate response?

Is the topic complicated? Does it need in-depth explanation?

Is negotiation involved or necessary to the outcome?

Do you need a written record of the conversation?

Do you need to have a dialogue rather than simply convey information?

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Email Pointers• Start with a salutation.• Ask for a response.• Use Spell Check & proof read.• Treat it like a business letter. • Avoid emoticons & Internet abbreviations• Create a professional “signature” at the end

of the email that includes your name, professional title, business name, phone number, and email address.

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Email

It pays to proofread!

“2gay sounds good - all of it. I'll are you Wed at lunch. And yes, you had told me about the New Year's reservation, but it's worth repeating. We always enjoy desert at your place! I'll have a but of nwa to share at lunch. Loplung forward to seeing you then!”

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Using these tips will help you:• Reach people who do not read well, or who do not

have time to read well

• Help all readers understand information

• Avoid misunderstanding and errors

• Save time, because it gets the job done well the first time

• Write with more impact

• Get better results

• Provide better service

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Presentation Resources

Writing pointers:

http://www.writerswrite.com/journal/sep02/srikanth.htm

http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/

http:// www.writingthatworks.com

Guide for Government:

www.plainlanguage.gov