5 reasons mentoring relationships fail
TRANSCRIPT
5 Reasons Mentoring
Relationships Fail - and how to
make sure yours doesn’t!
Ann Rolfe
Mentoring is critical to Career success and
satisfaction
It offers significant benefits to both mentors and mentorees
But mentoring
is not always
effective
Straus, S., Johnson, M., Marquesz, C., and Feldman, M. (2013) Characteristics of Successful
and Failed Mentoring Relationships Acad Med January 2013; 88(1): 82-89
Recent research in an academic setting identified
5 characteristics
of failed mentoring relationships
Straus, S., Johnson, M., Marquesz, C., and Feldman, M. (2013) Characteristics of Successful
and Failed Mentoring Relationships Acad Med January 2013; 88(1): 82-89
The good news is they also revealed 5 characteristics of successful mentoring!
Features of Failure(so you can avoid them)
#1 Poor communication
#2 lack of commitment
#3 Personality differences
#4 Perceived (or real) competition
#5 Mentor’s lack of experience
Secrets of Success(so you can apply them)
#1 Reciprocity
Development for both mentor and mentoree
#2 Mutual respect
#3 Clear expectations
#4 Personal connection
#5 Shared values
Value
Value
Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
Summary
Straus, S., Johnson, M., Marquesz, C., and Feldman, M. (2013) Characteristics of Successful
and Failed Mentoring Relationships Acad Med January 2013; 88(1): 82-89
No one wants to fail
So set yourself up for success!
from the start with these 5 steps …
#1 Build Rapport
Look for what you have in
common
!
Personal & professional background Interests, hobbies, sport
Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
Building Rapport develops
#2 Discuss Expectations
Share and clarify what
you each want …
Your purpose and goals
Scope and boundary of the relationship
Roles and Responsibilities
Logistics - practical aspects
Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
Discussing Expectations helps deal with:
#3 Create an Agreement
Negotiate ways you will respect
each other’s time, needs and differences …
Etiquette - do’s and don’ts
Ethics - code of conduct
Ground rules/ guidelines
Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
An agreement deals with:
#4 Understand mentoring is a two-way street
Mentoring benefits both parties
!
Both mentors and mentors will develop and grow
!
!
!
Mentors are not expected to have all the answers
Mentors listen and ask as much (or more)
than they show and tell
Features of Failure Secrets of Success
Poor Communication Reciprocity
Lack of Commitment Mutual Respect
Personality Differences Clear Expectations
Perceived/Real Competition Personal Connection
Mentor’s Lack of Experience Shared Values
Seeing mentoring as two-way deals with
#5 Schedule a Review
What you’ve achieved !
What’s working well !
What you’d prefer to do differently
!
After a few meetings have a conversation about:
Confirm your commitment to continue mentoring
A review allows you to:
!Seek additional !support, guidance !or resources
Or
!
Or, Agree to exit the relationship without fault or failure
I’m Ann Rolfe!I’ve specialised in mentoring
since 1994. !
I provide consulting, mentoring workshops,
keynotes, books and online learning
based on adult learning, and career development
!Visit !
www.mentoring-works.com !
+61 2 4342 2610