a christian marriage role model - virgil and petruta maxim

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A Christian marriage role model: Virgil and

Petruta MaximPosted by Claudiu August 22, 2011

Virgil Maxim at the age of 15, 19 and when he was released from Communist prison

Beloved young girls and boys who are planning to get married, God has prepared for each and

every generation Christian family models, models of holiness that should be taken as landmarksby us, the many, and we should follow them regardless of the times we are living in. Ranging

from Abraham and Sara to heavenly fathers Joachim and Anne, the thread of models to be

followed continues without interruption, and will be continuing until the end of time, as thegeneration that will not give saints to the world will be the last. Thus, holy models are not scarce,

what we lack are people willing to follow them.
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Therefore, because it seems to us that models from the past were able to live according to

Christianity because of the fact that they werent struggling with so many temptations as there

are nowadays, we will bring forth a Christian marriage model from a time close to ours, yetunimaginably more difficult to live in: The model of Virgil i Petru a Maxim, husband and wife.

At first glance, the marriage of the blessed Virgil and Petru a Maxim looks like a funny countryside tale. Yet, if we search deeper into this short tale, acknowledging its connection to the

live before wedding and the one after the wedding of the two main character, we will realize thatthe funny side of the story encompasses the most profound teachings of the sacrament of

matrimony.

After going out of prison, the student Virgil Maxim had initially opted for the monastic life,yet as his parents were sick and as there was no one else to look after them, he did not receive the

blessing from his spiritual father to enter in a monastery, and so he had to settle for the

alternative of a Christian marriage.

Yet, how could he find a proper girl for marriage, as he was a mature, 43 years old man with aruined social life? What could have been the demands of a man whose profession was that of a

student on going out of prison? What faithful and obedient girl could Virgil Maxim have found

in times when almost all the girls aged 17 or 18 years old were getting married?

Its easy to understand that he couldnt have found anything worthy, had it not been for Godsdeep care for all those who declare their faith in Him. And behold Gods providence, visible

when the time is right: a simple countryside girl, faithful, quiet, pure-heartedand wise, still

waiting for a man at the age of 35, still not having lost her virginity. A girl who had kept herpurity without complaining about the hormonal activity, about family pressures or time passing

by. A girl who carried on as a virgin with dignity because until Virgil Maxim appeared, she

didnt find any man worthy to be her suitor, and she had only met men who had materialagendas, petty figures, full of vices and wicked with passions; many like men nowadays, that is.

Even though Petru as demands were nothing out of the ordinary, but of the basic sort, one of her

aunts would still tell her decidedly: Darling, you can even shape him with the lathe and he will

still not come out as you want! Meaning: girl, youre asking too much from life, cant you see

there are no such men!? Youll die an old maid. Just pick one and be done with it! Yet the girlcould in no way be convinced by her relatives persistent advice, pieces of advice which could

have forced her into a failed marriage as it often happens today. And the girl endured it with

patience in her 35 years of age.

What is really surprising and unexpectedly beautiful in her holy expectancy, emerges from thegift with which the young girls patience is rewarded, and which is far beyond her expectations.

Not only was Petru a gifted with a husband who would correspond to all her demands, this man

was also more beautifully shaped than her aunt could imagine; a man spiritualized by the lathe ofthe toughest suffering and tortures of the 20th century.

What a great reward God gives to Petru a for being unrelenting in matters of sin and

compromises for a convenience marriage! He did not only prepare a non-drinking, non-smoker


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and non-violent man for her, but He also put aside for her a true avva of the communist prisons,

a wise, kind, immensely patient man, who was hard-working and full of gifts of the Holy Spirit.

Which of the girls nowadays wouldnt keep her virtues intact for such a man? not until turning20, or 30, but 35 years old, with the firm resolution of keeping away from corruption and

compromise even if she would not find a true man. This is how God looks after us, so that theone we cannot find, would appear in our lives when our souls are ready.

Even though Petru a was a simple countryside girl, the wisdom acquired through virtue helped her promptly reject the ill advising of the world, just as she had done until then:

Upon reading the Apostle, at the last verse And women shall fear their men one of her aunts,

sitting behind her, whispered in her ear:

Step on his foot! (habit according to which the man would be dominated by the woman)

Is this what you did, for that now Uncle John doesnt stay at home? the bride observed.

This is how this short episode taken from the marriage ceremony teaches us an important lesson:how to spiritually understand St. Apostle Pauls words, uttered during the sacrament of

matrimony. Lots of young people, especially girls nowadays are horrified by these words: And

women shall fear their men Rivers of ink have flown so as to make people understand the sortof fear we are talking about, and rivers will flow still, yet it wont be enough as long as young

people step over the threshold of the church with a bankrupt theological culture similar to the

Christian life they have lived until then. The Apostle Paul is not to blame for many brides andgrooms failures in their spiritual understanding of the Holy Scripture.

This is how we learn, without any theological explanation, what happens to women who do notfear their men as the Holy Scripture teaches us: Is this what you did, for that now Uncle John

doesnt stay at home? Which is another way of saying: Your man runs away from you becausehe feels unfulfilled seeing that you want to be in his shoes. Cant you see that you, as a woman,

would feel unfulfilled as well if the man played your part?

In other words, when a woman doesnt understand her role as a wife and as a mother, things turn

out to be catastrophic for the entire family, just as catastrophic as the situations caused by a manwho misses his vocation as a Christian husband and father. So, without theorizing the definition

of fear, we can notice that if we dont understand the roles required by the sacrament of

matrimony, we will fail in our family life. And there are people who fail time and time again and

still cant understand why they have such a difficult family life: because their lives are parallel tothe commandments of the God .

This was all the partying of the wedded pair: We had a peaceful wedding, at home. In other

words, the happy pairs devotion should give us much food for thought. It is not the homewedding that stands for their devotion, but the peacefulness of it; devoid of the noisiness of sin:

no white doves, a symbol of purity, when in fact the couple had lived in adultery; no musicians,


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no oratorical staged performances or other pompous surprises of a successful wedding that

crumbles with age.

And heres another lesson: the deeply spiritualized groom gives to his bride a cross he hadcarved in prison, a sign of unified sacrifice reflecting what the sacrament of marriage represents:

a permanent unified sanctification, in joy, and especially in sorrow; the cross of life carried onthe wings of love between a man and a woman.

While young grooms and brides today only think of an easy life, with travels through foreigncountries, with all things necessary in the household, and brilliant careers, we get slapped hard

by this example of spiritual Christian marriage: You might have to suffer, being by my side. We

will have to carry the cross of life together. Do not be deceived by the fact that I am a teachernow, because tomorrow I might have to dig out cesspools.

And because God loved the groom who confessed his faith in exchange of his youth and life, the

groom receives the proper response from the wife that God had put aside for him and who

measures up to his merits as a man:

Even if Ill have to look after cows, I will be with you and I will not leave you! We will getalong together as one gets along with ones soul.

That is, no airs, no crying, no sniveling because of a difficult life, but commitment, shared

sacrifice for life, no matter how hard it would be. Petru a Maxim followed Gods beloved man

throughout all the tests that have strayed over them: Security baffles, disease, poverty, and manymore. All of these things made them feel even more united, helping them perfect their love

towards one another and their love towards God. And because Petru a Maxim followed Virgil

Maxim, the witness, she is a happy witness just like all mothers and wives of witnesses in

communist prisons.

I think the most important lesson we have to learn from these happy witnesses, is this one: a

Christian marriage is a Hymn to the carried cross and so should be all marriages of practicing

Christians: hymns of praise dedicated to God.

a christian marriage role model - virgil and petruta maxim

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