a clock in his eyes

8/14/2019 A Clock In His Eyes

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A Clock In His EA year of poems

By Liam RobbCopyright 2010 Liam Robb


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CONTENTS:

FOREWORD

EXPERIENCE BLESSINGS

How to Bless a New HouseImbolc Day

Almost-Summer Air

Hands Are JoinedHallowed EarthMidnight Moth

HonestySamhain Stars

Midwinter

INTROVERSION

Is Mise ruinnLike Raindrops In The Sun

Thermal ConvectionRavenheartBlue EyesArmour Knots

Ive No Words Left In My HeadA Diaphragmatic VoiceForetelling

STORYTELLER'S CIRCLE

Clock Speck

Callous TombsGabrielle


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This Is My CurrentDisaster

New and Frenzied Names

Some Other CreatureLETTERS TO YOU

RoRobinAseretSubside

GoodbyeLearning PassageThe Sharing

The Recital TreeSomething of a Stranger

CURLED UP WITH MACHINES

TriskaidekaphobiaThe Rooftops Far Beneath My FeetVeniality

Dada Poem IIMourningland

Mud and Rain and Leaves

SECRET OBSERVATIONS

The Left Lung Is Smaller What Is This Place?

I SayTempleKestrel

A River In My House

A Temporary World


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Foreword A Clock In His Eyes is a project whose idea I first stumbledupon a year before this publication. WithTerror Jubilation and

Hemera's Interruption , I had very clear intentions and themesto work with, and the collections came very naturally out of afluid process, whileOf Concrete Design was an extension of that. But while I was compiling the last book, I realised I had agood dozen poems floating around with no home, some of them unleashed on my blog but others simply clogging up myhard drive and glaring at me from the pages of notebooks.These poems, for whatever reason, didn't seem to fit together inany way that would lead to a collection, so I decided toforcefully collect them into a book of miscellany, but in doingso I found my way into a new project with a new intention. In

some ways also an extension of the last book, I view this one asa journal of a similar nature, though instead of writing about poems of course the poems are here in their entirety. These poems are unedited, unconscious spewings of my languagestream. What started as a journal, a mismatched collection, became a year of poems, a project aimed at simply publishing whatever on earth came out of my fingers and mymouth for an entire year. But in this itself I realised that these poems did have connections, once I was done, that I had almostwritten six little mini-collections that interlocked in some way.So this book is split into those six sections and not presented inchronological order, because it seems that even unconsciouslywe are often more aware of what we're doing than we allowourselves credit for.


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Experience BlessingsWe are the strange folk, the edge people.


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How To Bless a New H1. Press your ear against its walls2. Shake hands with its doors3. Tap your fingernails across its floors4. Lay a flower at its stoop5. Fly down its stairs6. Dance in its garden7. Breathe on every single window8. Introduce yourself to its hearth9. Whisper hello to those who lived there before10. Whisper goodbye to those who lived there before


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Imbolc DayThe earth is still frozenBut buds have now sprungYellow from the icy blanketGreen from the dull and greyPlumage in the sky is brightAs the sun is warming raven and robinGrass is crisp and mud is wetSoon there will be life new and young

The Bride is smiling as the day lengthensFrom now the sun and son only growCrocus breaking through the frostDiana, Venus, Februa entwined

Tiny flames rejoice the lightWhen once its set, candles brightHoney cakes and sweetened wineDivine is sun and frost inside


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Almost-Summer AirAlmost-summer air caught in my throatFor just a momentCadence released from flowing pollenInto my chest, to sit

Butterfly on my wrist awoken by thisBeating to the skyHer wings unchained and open againSilent egg no more

Dancing in the blaze of cataract No release from thatFelicitous and momentarily stunned

Eyes to the sunAlmost-summer air caught in my throatFor just a momentMy heart stops in my chest to mar -

Oh there you are


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Hands Are JoinedDancing in the midday sunA wilderness takes over usIn the circle, fresh hawthornGod and Goddess, hands are joinedRibbons churning in the breezeSing of bright and hopeful thingsDrums still beat in hallowed placesDeep down in my every crevice


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Hallowed EarthI want to dance on hillsAnd kneel down in ancient grovesLet my hair fall down in curlsAnd squirm my fingers with the worms

Bathe in soil and leaves and dustSongbirds pray for Hallowed EarthIll run through fields during stormsSkies lit up, iced and torn

Ill throw flowers in the river Follow them, drowned, to the seaThe gloaming will come overhead

And Ill close my eyes in the dark Lift me up, the winds now rageCarry me to auspicious placesDawning in the midnight galesWise and whispered voices, faces

I want to sing along with themWords no man or woman knowThey have not been sung or said Not since we lived and danced in caves

I can hear breathing in the cloudsThey are tuning to my lungs aboveBecome, for some, a stolen glanceAt lissom wonder, almost done


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If verdant mysteries were mineTo hide behind bewildered eyesId treasure all that ever wasAnd all that could ever beI want to dance on hillsAnd kneel down in ancient grovesLet my hair fall down in curlsAnd squirm my fingers with the worms

Bathe in soil and leaves and dustSongbirds pray for Hallowed EarthIll run through fields during stormsSkies lit up, iced and torn


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Midnight MothMidnight Moth, he came to meand danced around my roomused my hair as fresh cut grassmy hand as soft white snow

Midnight Moth, you came to meand whispered in my ear Im the cousin of your butterflyI have stories you should hear

Midnight Moth, he had no fear he looked me in the eyeLughnasadhs moon so high above

his dust lit up the skyMidnight Moth, you echoed withthe fading hum of drumstake me to your dusty realmsand I will come back one


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HonestyIt was the day I gave almost everythingFor the first time in a long timeI always believed an honest lieBut now my lies are my honestyPink flowers are my saviour A green mask for my spiritual faceSeashells are calling to meAs night and day fade in supremacyA new book for a new chapter A new place for new space


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Samhain StarsReturn you to the AutumnLittle Samhain starsYou served your purpose well

Fell from skyward men and womenTo honour the fallen womanYou served your purpose well

Crunchy, crunchyOrange glowSamhain starsHow much you know


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MidwinterThe longest bite of night andThe shortest breath of dayGreenery still, beneath the whiteWaiting for the rebirth of light

Frosty biting at my fingersOrions belt up in the skyThe Oak King is victoriousAgain, the Holly fallsMidwinter time is here, we seeWhen the robin hops up on Her shrineDeclared by the Goddess, the battle wonThe Sun will now return, reborn


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IntroversionYour worst enemy cannot harm you as much

as your own unguarded thoughts.


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Is Mise ruinnIs mise ruinnI would say one dayIf we lived with treesIf we slept on the groundIs mise ruinnA wise forest-forager Climbing rocks and wellsJust to see what they possess

StillIs mise ruinnI will say todayAmongst the corporate standing stones

Here in concrete evolutionHere in cracked and stolen rhymes

Is mise ruinnYou may not have seen himBut he is me and I am he


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Like Raindrops In The I want to disappear sometimes, like raindrops in the sunWarmed to the point of evaporation and willing not to runAlive, I wake in roaming clouds to reach across the continentsWrap my fingers around blue sky, sea and earthly monumentsMine to break and mould and carve planets in the universeLeave my essence on their birth, a mark of rains creationHere in my heart Ill hold celestial dances in orbit of what wasThen come back down to earth again and take up broken love


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Thermal Convection Now I have clarity gripped tight in one handThe other to smother any wind that flowsI have realised that I was right all alongRight to guard the careful spark I felt you arise like a thermal convectionBattle against my long-built protectionThough strike as you did at my inner foundationsYou acted as though I had written your partIn this play I can look back and sayThat exposure of cores could never be yoursBecause I can see in ways you cannotI knew you would fulfil my propheciesI saw you fall, I felt hesitance, the lies

You cannot hide from one who sees Now at a crossroads Ill say goodbyeAnd hope you can find your wayIll follow an uncertain pathWith little light to guide uncertain feetThough I know this was the only way No one else has come this far


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RavenheartOver battlefields she soarsThat ever-watchful eyePlaces some men fear to treadOthers too eager to loveBlack-feathered crescent aliveOn the brow of patience

There's a warrior insideA poet, a dancer entwined

Claws to grasp the bark The aging Oak ever-welcomingWitnessing the bloodshed

All this inside my heartOn the raven's breathThe crow's courageous caw


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Blue EyesTheres a sea in my eyesA captivationRolling in and outThe wavesYour hand caught in a current No delayA cage inside an ocean wallBelieveIn the magic of blue eyesDying forever Gulls and schools of lonely fishFastidiousUnkept


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ArmourI took off my armour And stood naked in the rainIt was a dream I once hadA dream about the endBecause the time will comeI knowWhen certainty will falter When pleasantry will pauseAnd I will be lost to the storm

Battlements fall at my feetFrom my head, betrayedDefences no longer strengthened

By a steady handA steady heartA monolith within

Examine crumbled rock At the base of sky-touching towersAnd you may find in decayWhat was lost in riveted calling

A semblance there isHere in the depths of the moundOf an undeniable truth:My head will lie downWith the wolf by my sideMy arms open to all


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KnotsI'm tying knots in the SunMy fingers feed from the EarthLike roots, I'm old and buriedUp to my wrists in fear Blackbird, teach me to sing like youTo call the early morning forthFrom beneath the cloak of nightReturn

Oceans in my eyes I hideGlisten in the low blue moonEvery brick I pull and ruinWalls of ancient qualms are raised

Blackbird, teach me how to flyLike you, I'll rise and take up highTo defy them once againEver huntingEver fell


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I've No Words Left In MIve no words left in my headThey flew away with my hair perhapsSnipped and let loose on wrestling wingsForever in the wind unleashedI dream that sometime in the futureA badger or a fox might findChunks and chains of whispered hair And learn to speak the words insideOr else to build a nest with itTiny birds with tiny songsTo lay their young down with a chant No bird has ever learned before


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A Diaphragmatic VoicTicking awayTick, ticking awayBeneath what you see

A voice you have never heard

Crawling up from the depthsFrom isolationFrom a hedonistic Hades

Too long inside, I findToo long imprisonedScratching at the light outside


Became a feathered falconRazors for eyes and feetRode its way to freedom

Above I see in darknessThe voice that I can followThe voice I can respect


Tear awayTear, the oldIm calling now


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ForetellingForetelling is a gift I dont possess Not in a personal appealA window into another worldShrinking into my pocketInto the eyeI have seen in the pastTiny glimpsesI have known the worldBe it now no aid to meGlimpses awakeningShouldering sighsEven the sky denies me

Under a blanket of flesh and steelA skeleton made of snow Neither this nor thatA connection is madePerhaps I am not awake to itScissors to my spinal-spunThread of glistening iceI have takenA blizzard gift that cannot be controlledForetelling the worldAbsentAlone


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Storyteller's CircleAnd the point is, to live

everything. Live the questions now.


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SpeckI am but a speck in your great sandsBut every speck makes whole the landI climb your mountains, dive in lakesPray your arm-length branch wont break

As I creep along your bold-spun reachesGlancing down at fevered leechesI hear the creak before the snapAnd with glee I leap where shadows lack


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Callous TombsI looked into the eyes of a goddess one dayShe blinked with bewildered eyesUnknown to Her, this time and landA land She could not proficiently describe"I do not recognise my country,I do not recognise," She said"That hollow look in people's eyes,Oblivious to my arising."She took a step into the worldLegs of old and new formationShe bowed down at the tender scaleAnd chose her punishment wiselyQueen of Love and Queen of Grace

She gave Her crown to vicious racesSpilling blood in Her ocean wombHer head laid down in callous tombs


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GabrielleShe walked on sleeping gravesWith no thought for the sleeper Glistened in the midnight sunBecause it had long called to her A calling she had heard beforeDeep in Earth and SkyStones and trees and beesWhispering her nameShe walked in blistered junglesWonders no man has ever seenThe heat nothing to her gripHer cool and deadly grip on lifeShe crawled in temple tunnels old

Slept beneath the soil and sandTo sing her own songs to the CoreAnd answer beckoning voices


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This Is My CurrentKeep them close to your heartKeep them close to your sideThe apparent forsaken onesThe apparent forgotten ones

In a world of black and whiteAlways see the grayFor if the roles were reversedYoud have them see your shades

I cannot stand and watch the endOf all our dignityFor throughout the darkest storm of night

Youd place your light on meThis is my currentThe current of my confusionThe current of opportunity


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DisasterSat by the windowThought of a songStrumming through my earsI couldn't sleep long, sinceYou've come and goneA smile for a tear and a tear for a smileAt the same time, they're mineAre you there?Struggling to breathe sometimesHere in a catalystSat by the windowMy eyes cannot blink

for usthey are wideAll my doors are closedThat is how I prefer itI do not wantI need, in my chestWaking up at long lastThis creatureDisaster


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New and Frenzied NamI danced until I could no longer danceInvoking spirits I did not know New and frenzied names called meCalled me to sit by their hearthsI laughed once I was doneA laugh of pure joy in thisBecause delirious I am made of goldIn love I am made of silver Wrestled from my throat, my heartBy gloried green tea and ferocityMind afresh with wild new wordsBody stung by lack of breathAnd this is all I need


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Some Other CreatureI spent a moment looking backwardOn the morn of looking forwardWaiting for the high Full MoonTo tell me all her secret troubles

There is something of a priceOn it

ReactWhat a strange display, to sayHow much there is to look atHow much there is to seeIn me

There is only so muchRescued from a fevered dreamIn which I could not be me Not I Not himSome other creature

Forward


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Letters To YouBorn green we were

to this flawed garden.


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RoOh my friendI just dont knowHow to tell you my sorrowCan you forgiveA wandering centreA compass unsettled on you?Ro, I knowI wasnt thereIf only I could have seenThe shadows inThe bright sun smileA shroud you have perfectedOh my friend

I should have knownWhat lurked beneath your eyesTiny handsYoull never holdStill clutching at your heartRo, I knowI wasnt thereI havent been for an ageWho am IBut just a friendWho left you so far behind?Still tearsHeld in my eyesAre useless and overdueFor youIll not forgetAnd pray for your forgiveness


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RobinWhat has become of her now?

She is a little robinHopping in the gardenShe is a little robinHopping on the fence

I see her hereI see her thereShe follows me No trace of fear

What does she have to fear of me?

They think shes goneBut we, we knowWeve seen a sacred wayOn graceful days

Queen of BirdsShe is to usCrowned upon her Dying breath

Never such a grateful day as this

Shes right behind youDont step back Shes right behind youDont look back


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Red breast robinI see you thereWhy fear me?We are family

What crows and hawks shall we embrace?My face is stained but still I waitFor you to come, just one more timeMy gardens kept just for your eyes


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Aseret Now there is a questionTo validate your endWe wonder in the shallow pitsLooking for last thoughtsHow could you trust that manOver your beloved mother?How could you condemn childrenTo grim and disregard?She says you were beyond thatHe has found and full, destroyedAll you ever left behindAll you ever wereTheres no answer to the question

Not now you are beyondAll you ever left behindAll you ever were


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SubsideContortion in the windSilent sting andMetal hiss

Stasis reminds youOf your starvationHollow

Hauled into theAir and sprungAloud

Bitter dew of that

Morning lust lightWaiting again

It is the arrow once thatStrikes your designSubside


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GoodbyeGoodbye youI knew you for yearsYour cover spread on my kneesIn thisI am told over againWhat a remarkable friend you have beenSitIve come too far and highTo leave you in enemy hands to beOnce moreI will cast you in flame, my friendAnd welcome descendents in place No

It wasnt a decision of tasteI only question who you did becomeI knewThe scratching of pristine pagesCould no longer be hidden and cagedGoodbye youI knew you for yearsI told you all of my blessed secretsStillYou charge me with colour and lightAnd I thank ancient gods for our timeOnce moreI am settled on new and loved lifeAs you blacken and burn in the nightMy friend

I am yours to remember, a scribeOf pleasure and terrors and full moon delight


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And youTake my word that youll always beThe sacred, the haunting, the first


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Learning PassageI need to find you againIn this island placeMade of glass and steelSo ruthless if you forgetForget to turn away sometimesOpen yourself to spearsAnd spears you shall receiveIn this hiding placeIn this learning passageYou always leave me at this timeCool reason and belief To dig amongst the rocks beneathWith pale and blistered fingertips

Deny me this, my longingAgain I am removedAll because of you


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The SharingQuietly, cautiously happyUnusual peaceI welcome this somehowGrain slips through my fingersInto another, waiting, handPredictability is lost againUncertain but substantialYet more certain, I smileI will not let goGrip in the second handThe first will wait its turnThe sharing has comeAn honest feast

A beautiful meal that I will protectWith every blade and spear This stranger with his mealSat at my tableHe spokeGrain


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The Recital TreeI need to know your name, I feel, to grasp your treasured heart.I must learn your rites and learn your songs, your wood, your leaves, your bark. Why do you grow fruit, your closestneighbour only spines? Why do you grow tall and strong, your cousin merely hide behind? I need to know what you haveseen, a comfort in the morning sun. How long have youclaimed this place, this ground where youd begun? Ill learn torecognise your skin and welcome you to mine. From this begins that gentle thought; deep terror well decline.


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Something of a StrangeI wonder if Ill cryWhen you diePass through the sunToward a deeper nightI wonder if youll cryIn another worldWhen I diePass through the moon

A looming questionI wont look forward to


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Curled Up With MachiNothing here to fear,

I'm just sitting around being foolish,when there is work to be done.


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Triskaidekaphobia1. I remember a time whenWords were not weaponsOnly harmless little sounds

2. I remember a time whenCities looked so grand and tallSo beautiful and clean

3. I remember a time whenDifference was celebrated Not something to be feared

4. I remember a time when

Laughter was the only healing Nothing callous or stung

5. I remember a time whenYou were a friend to all Now you are nothing but dour

6. I remember a time whenWe could sit in the same roomBefore you turned away

7. I remember a time whenSolace wasnt worth a thoughtHow fatuous were we?

8. I remember a time whenWe didnt need to fight


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The Rooftops Far BeneathI had a random thoughtto rise above the steepsthe rooftops far beneath my feetwatching as I goGlitter in the sun

the tea of fallen skiesspells he can no longer castto forlorn surprise


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VenialityTell me the names of all your godsI will crush them allI am a victim of venialityThis is the grim secret I command

You are the world that tries to deny usYet still we stand before you strongMotionless in the dying windsOf your brazen hurricane

I can see you where you standLaughing with mocking gleeWould you laugh if you could see

The pains of your legacy?


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Dada Poem IIAttempted and fearedIn the festivities gotWe learn with promiseThat there is a cycle

New heart father, fadingPerception, universeInjection of the storyKilling a stranger

Microbes endure in the doorwaySuperimposed to the floor Living, he knew the hunter

Riding the form all he knewMurdered anecdotes later decayWhere Rhea objectively satFragile, firmly different deityAncient in each sea of fact


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MourninglandInterconnection and flaw are my phenomenology and in circlesI wade through the din, perceiving the schism, intruding chasm,awakened subrogation within. From the cold comes the sun,from the rain comes the fire, contradictions are sold andshowered in gold, in eternity shallow and sired. Taken by thehand to mourningland, just a child who knows what they'velost, leading the way for others to follow, a path tomorrowforgot.


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Mud and Rain and LeaMud and rain and leavesMy religion is all this;Mud and rain and leaves


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Secret ObservationsSometimes no amount of mooning around in misty forest

glades or communing with nature at the bottom of the garden

will bring about anything other than a general sense of damp.


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The Left Lung Is SmalThe left lung is smaller To make room for the heartAn instrument of wonder Crafted from raw need

They built asylums for itGlass cages of dry reasonDouble masks drank its bloodComedy and tragedy

The left lung is smaller To make room for the heartA place wherein dwells

Cotton-hard constructionThere is no other shameGreater than a broken instrumentDrought in a river bedCastles in the sea


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What Is This Place?A kittens purr is whereI first heardit And a babys sec-ret laugh Justa questionof under-standing Whatis this placewe call re-ality?

Im sure Iheard it inthe waves of ancient wa-ters Here inthe call of birds Just aquestion of understand-ing What isthis strange placewe call re-ality?


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I SayTheres an opera in that treeI say, an opera in that treeIf you listen carefullyI say, listen carefullyYou can hear the aria aloneI say, the aria alone

Theres a sparkle in that treeI say, a sparkle in that treeIf you watch it carefullyI say, watch it carefullyYou can see the moon insideI say, the moon inside

Theres a softness in that treeI say, a softness in that treeIf you touch it carefullyI say, touch it carefullyYou can feel the silky bark I say, the silky bark

There is jasmine in that treeI say, jasmine in that treeIf you breathe in carefullyI say, breathe in carefullyYou can smell the sweet caressI say, the sweet caress

There are apples in that treeI say, apples in that tree


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TempleI will fall, and I will riseA Moon, I will arise, descendThe Snake in his eternal loopThe lotus on the water's edgeThe biting frost of cruel Winter's loveThe flowers of my Summer's unrestCelebrations within this TempleMadness, dance above


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KestrelThe sky is twisting, turningOr my head is turned aroundThe North is speeding fast towards usAdjuvant is the roaring groundI hear the call and look up highShe's there, I knew she would beEyes me with her eldritch eyesPiercing to the core of meRiding on the thermals highShe reigns, a feathered Queen and IShe knows will follow her homeIn roaming spirit and in grace


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A River In My HouseIn winter there is a river in my houseWhen snow has settled with an orange glowSink into the calm and coiled abyssAnd combat clear crystal cutsRise up from the river, fortifyAnd strengthen my spiritFrom the cold and from the mistA natural invention, man-made moats


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A Temporary WorldThe sky is speaking againin his booming, forlorn voice;Here I am, stillShow to us your spirit

FlashEverything stops to witness thisa temporary world


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Credits

Photography by:Ben Kersey

Lena Pautina

Quotations from:

1. Restall Orr, Emma (2004) Living Druidry.London, Piatkus Books Ltd

2. Bodhi, Bhikkhu (2005) In the Buddha's Words: An Anthology of Discourses from the PaliCanon. Somerville, Wisdom Publications

3. Rilke, Rainer Maria (1934, 2004) Letters To AYoung Poet. New York, W. W. Norton &

Company, Inc.4. Plath, Sylvia (1981)Sylvia Plath Collected

Poems, Firesong. London, Faber and Faber

Limited5. Amos, Tori (2004)Scarlet's Walk,Wednesday [CD] UK. Epic.

6. Froud, Brian & Lee, Alan (1978) Faeries. NewYork, Harry N. Abrams Inc.


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a clock in his eyes

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