aceaommodations are - tech.mit.edutech.mit.edu/v69/pdf/v69-n26.pdf · guessed that my sex was...

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-A I .-- P.cit

PRICE TEN CENTS

nalyzer ETvolves Humananinking n Machine Loo S

s Danger To Societyobably the most startling andfying thing to come out of theerious laboratories of the mod-scientist is a man. Yes, one ofe marvels of the present day-

g Machine, capable ofsubtracting and performingd of tasks in the realm ofer mathematics, a machine

Is endowed with a memoryevidently a conscience since

are told that it sometimes goesa mechanical device more

n than humanity-has givento a man . . . or a monster.

happened yesterday. A reportera photographer from The Daily

mer were visiting the differen-analyzer laboratory at MI.T.routine assignment when theyd their genial host, Dr. Hur-e Fortz, to run. through a

~ple calculation. Dr. Fortzled a few dials on the controle1 and then decided to try anriment. Into a slot marked

estions in Here," he stuffed 150(Continued on Page 7)

clearly. He asked me to repeat anctfortunately, at this time, the girlstanding next to me answered forme after I fumbled with an answer.

Tall and AloofOf course, during this time, the

"other" girls were joking andflirting with the various men.I had to remain aloof- and silent.This, and my unusual height (5'-11"plus 3" heels) marked me as beingout of place. Then too, wig or no,I did not quite look like a ravingbeauty; this might have been at-tributed to the relative linitedchoice of co-eds at the Institute.

I went to two of the nine frater-nity parties, and then my escortbegged-off further disits with theexcuse that I was not feeling verywell. Up to this point, no one hadguessed that my sex was anythingother than female; indeed, the Sinm-mons entrant told me the followingday that while she thought that Iwas an extremely unfriendly girlwhen she stood next to me, shenever suspected that I wasn't a girluntil I was exposed on the followingday.

News Discovers HoaxElwyn Silverman, Editor of the

News, slept on the facts and Satur-day morning woke up with therealization that the Technologybeauty was a he. Meanwhile, ourteam held a policy meeting at which

(Continued on Page 5)

lps Don't Actoap-box Orator Runsmuck When Boston'sinest are Smeareday 5 - Boston's staid Commony was the scene of a wild dem-ration completely ignored bypolice. Staley Nevin, Britishalist Party candidate for Par-ent, was haranguing a huged from the Park bandstand onbenefits of socialized mathe-cs when a heckler in the backhurled a ripe papaya at thed.Le crowd immediately turnedhe demonstrator and swept himre them up to the state house

(C7ontin.uea on Page 2)

·Z;JUU 1UULLrtL1'J VIL IU tUUL.OLJ.u

order to be eligible for thisaid, the student must be rece:his training in science or tedcogy. This means that the appmately thirty-five Chinese studat the Institute will be eligible.

Ranking second only to Carthe Chinese student body recetheir education in UniversitiesColleges in the United States rbers close to 4000.

I "JUNIOR" MUGSThose who have ordered

"Junior" mugs may pick themup on Wednesday, May , iMay n thelobby of Building 10, sometimebetween 9 and 12. If this timeproves inconvenient for anyone,contact John T. Weaver, '50,Atkinson 203.

DEADLINE FOR ARRANGINGCONFLICUTAND SPECIAL

EXABMNATIONS

The deadline for submittingrequests for special and conflictexaminations this term will beWednesday, May 11.

Arrangements for conflictexaminations or examinationsnot listed on the May-June 1949Examination Schedule cannotbe made after 5 p.m., Wednes-day, May 11.

Over Buxom Bevg(Special to the Daily Reamer)

BEST-IN-SHOW BOSTON, May 7-The Editor of.. THE TECH, posing under the name

Above: A close-up of Miss Tech-nology of 1949 and New EnglandCo-ed Queen. She was judged Best-in-Show at the first annual beautycontest held at Boston University.

Escaped RussianPrisoner Exposes

of Miss Technology, the woman whohas been causing men all over Bos-ton to gasp and wonder, was un-animously chosen "Queen" of theGreater New England Co-Ed BeautyContest.

Atthis eHaydthe Ipeoplweekof figenthl

Clonamecarefuntilning,first

ThclimaTech]ing sday e

i p ProM scuity an opJet[ is. e °t Iearlie,W YORK, May 5 (URP)- smilibngs are lousy in the Soviet," roomBoris Tschenklana, former finallaborer, through an F.B.I. in- Onc

eter. Mr. Tschenklana, who viewects to support himself by writ- magrnagazine articles on conditions Suchad the iron curtain, gave so quelf up to the authorities An


with personal connections can se-cure them.

Starting salaries for bachelors arefrom $250 to $31,0 per month; mas-

-ters $350 per month; doctors from$5000 per year, increasing with theamount of experience.Course XII

Every geology student graduatingthis June will have his choice offour or five positions, and ProfessorW. L. Whitehead expects that allundergraduates who want summerwork in geology can be placed. Pro-fessor Whitehead stated that the de-mand for geologists is growing, andthat the demand is a healthy one.The geological survey, oil and min-eral prospecting, are the fields opento geologists; and the frantic seek-ing out of natural resources to re-plenish our mineral and petroleumreserves is causing an ever increas-ing demand for trained men.

Starting salaries for bachelorsworking in the United States arefrom $325 to $350 per month; for-eign service salaries are about $385,plus living expenses. The principaldemand in geology, however, is formasters, whose pay for continental(U. S.) service ranges from $3'50 to$400 per month. Doctors can ex-pect about $4800 per year from in-


REMINDERSENIOR CLASS ENDOWMENT

CALL AT ROOM 2.125

lavish ceremonies held earlierevening at Boston University'sien Hall, Aliss Sandra Rubin,person whose name has keptle guessing for the past twos, received an enormous crown, leaves, amid the cheers of anusiastic crowd of onlookers.Dthed in low-cut secrecy, thee of the MX.T. entrant wasully held from the public eye,the final round Saturday eve-..where it was revealed for the

time.e ceremony 'tonight was, theax of a two-day ordeal fornology's entry. After attend-several fraternity parties Fri-evening, and participating inpen car parade through Bostoner this afternoon, a tired butng queen was led back to herto prepare for this evening'sordeal.e of the judges, when Inter-ed, had this to say: "She isLificent. Such feminine form.

L charm and grace. Such.; Andiet, too."other judge had this to say:


r"overayBe Settled

Aceaommodations3 Are Consideration

An orderly "row" was created lastweek when a special investigatingcommittee appointed by Dr. Killianiiscussed the possibilities of hold-

Y ing the Fresnhman Camp orienta-ion program at the Institute.

On Wednesday, at Institute Conm-r nittee, the matter was discussed,1. and although no conclusive vote

wt as taken, the major expression of.jpianion was against having thezamp at Technology.

The special comrrmittee, which isn headed by Dean Thomas Pitre andy .ncludes Dean Everett M. Baker,

yProfessor B. Alden Thresher, Pro-lessor Rule, C. Jack Jacoby, '50, Clay· urchell, '50, and Wesley J. Hay-

e wood, '52, met last Tuesday ande will meet again Thursday.- The first and most urgent prob-

Yem which must be settled regard-a ,ng the program is that of location.

.n past years Freshmen Camp has, Jeen run by T.C.A. at Camp Won-

-erlaald, Sharon, Nass.

Limited FacilitiesLast September the largest Fresh-

man Camp up to that time washeld at Camp Wonderland and thefacilities for sleeping were thought

,' to 'be filled to capacity. Many fresh-men, however, did not attend the

.1 camp, and it is questionablewhether enough space is available

' at the Sharon site to accommodate _. all of the 700 incouiing freshmen.

It is the desire of President Killiant and other Institute officers that allt freshmen should be able to attend. the orientation program.

Accommodations for the entiret freshman class can be Iprovided at

the Institute through use of the(Continued on Page 3)

-Tech Banner

Pihoto by tionigsberg

Garvin Ml. Moore's plane with banner "Heep Up With THE TECH ReadTHE TEOCH". The plane is scheduled to fly during breaks today in the

Great Court.

The Tech is taking to the air.Today at 12 noon and again atI p.m. a special chartered plane willtake off from the Great Court."Satan's Stepchild," piloted byGarvin M. Moore, '50, will carryThe Tech's banner aloft -under thepower of a nitrated mixture ofmethanol and castor oil.

A Carl Goldberg Nifty, the planeis 28" in length, with a 23" wingspan and is powered by a class Bengine. Maneuvers are controlledthrough a 35' cable. The trailingbanner is the invention of TheTech's research staff. Gauze, stab-ilized with two pennies and alounge-bar cup, keep the ad levelin flight. The only difficulty is thespeed of the plane which ap-proaches 60 miles per hour. Spec-tators will have to look quickly toread the text.

The flight path of the plane can

be misjudged by onlookers, and con-tact can incur considerable annoy-ance. In addition, the ship mightbreak a prop. Air currents deter-mine a great part of the plane'sbehavior, especially during land-ings. The pilot hopes that the windwill be right or the area protectedduring the demonstration.

Long interested in model aircraft,"Satan's Step-Child" is Moore's firstventure in cable controls. The nameis apparently expressive and ap-propriate since between burnt outglow-plugs, broken props, and in-nocent bystanders, the Iplane hashad its quota of mishaps.

Ignition TroubleNo Course XVI man, Garvin has

not had the confusions of aero-dynamic formulas to cope 'with.Trypically, the ignition system hascaused the greatest trouble. He is


I7 itorial .

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sed 1

LXIX, No. 26

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PLACEMENTINFORMATION

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Companies to be at the Institute.North American Aviation, Los An-

geles, Cal., May 2; VI7 (S.M., PhD.)The Glenn L. Martin Comipany, Bal-

timore, Md., May 2; XVI, VI, II, I.Consolidated Vultee Aircraft Corp.,

Fort Worth, Texas, May 2; XVI,Ii (S.M., Ph.D.)

Mutual Boiler, Boston, Mass., May2; VI.

The Warner & Swasey Co., Cleve-land, Ohio, May 3; II, XV.

Bendix Radio, Baltimore, Md., May4, N,.

Abraham & Straus, Inc., Brooklyn,N. Y., May 5; XV, II, V.

G;raydon, Smith & Go., Boston,Mass., May 6; II, VX.

Crown Zellerbach Corp., Portland,Oregon, May 6; I.

U. S. Coast & Geodetic Survey, Bos-ton, Mass., May 10; VI.

Baldwin Locomotive, Philadelphia,Pa., May 11; II, VJI.

Kimberly-Clark Corp., Neenah, Wis.,May 13; X, VII, II, XV.Companies to contact by letter:

Beryllium Corp., Reading, Pa.; V, X,XII.

Landers Frary & Clark, New Brit-ain, Conn.; XV.

PsyehologistsSee No Reason

Explanation of FunnelCraze a Mystery

As the funnel club craze spiralsdownward and downward, TheDaily Reamer sought the. answer tothhs phenomenon of human be-havior by consulting several emi-nent psychologists. A conensus oftheir measured opinions reveals aninability on thle part of science toexplaku why some people are soanxious to lose $20.

According to Dr. N. U. Roses, thebehavior may be an exhibition ofmass neuroses of the psychoseswhich could develop into a danger-ous tendency toward schiqohreniaif allowed to continue unchecked.He further cited the enjoymentsome people receive when losingmoney at the race track as an anal-ogy of the present behavior. He de-clined to comment on whether hethought the ,present trends meanta fundamental change in humouethics and the end of the capitalistspirit.

Professor R~. L. Jsmyth, while ad-mitting a danger to his professionin the lack of ulcers in a societywhere the motivating principle waslosing money, declared, '"the fmnnelclubs can't last. Someone is suiteto try to work them mi reverse.Once going in this direetion, every-one will want to invest the dollarshe has gained and reach the top ofa sort of pyramid_,A" So fax, thoere has been no indication ,that a re-verse trend will be establlshed.Everyone interviewed by T1e Reamer ,hs declared an uneqivo-l;al loyalty to the funnel cause.

Wildmenf(Continued from Page 1) t

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overtyNewest craze to sweep Greai

Boston and its environs, the fuclubs continue to spread their teacles throug every class andttrict. Latest reports estimatetotal membership at over two nlion. In Arlington alone, policefto be summoned to handle Jcrowds craving to lose their mogin the mad scheme while istores reported they were soldof Scotch, traditional refreshM:at the funnel club parties.Just in case our readers hav~

been hit by the bug, funnel cliwork like this: someone with$2Rinduces two friends to each acces$512 'of his money; these, in *divide the sum among two m~friends. The money is usuallyried from house to house in ice cLtrays furnished by The DWorker.

Each recipient invites his im:diate benefactor to an opium Miing and whiskey dr'i brawli'his kitchen. Because of the dEculty in maintaining the chainibroken as each dollar descendshuman shaft, carrier pigeon ser-has been taxed to the limit by tconstant monitoring.

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Huge crowds lining up outsidethomes of wealthy residents of Ne;ton were quizzed by your repor0Said O. G. Scholzman, a payRclerk from Dorchester, "This isthird dollar I've collected wit-the past two nights." Funnel Ethusiasts conwrmed the repor~ttmany such members were :ticipating in as many as ten citthus accounting for the long kI

Also in the line was J. PierSnahiI, prominent State Sftrbanker, who announced, "As soas I lose this $2,OU I'm goingstart rig.% hi again on ano0Not since the halcyon cays of lPyramid clubs have there bemdmany .payoffs within a single

Funnel clubs have also been.testing many of the Greater B-ton colleges. At Harvard aIlninety per cent of the student ~were reported to be on the receit.end of funnels. Only at the Esachusetts Institute of Techn0:mas there been a dearth of parargely attributed to the predic

Yf the noted mathematician Dr. )ert Skeimer that the funnel d6E

mould precipitate because of to(Mo2tfinue orb Page 7)

Chief Gettum ducks from the bar-rage of questions fired at him byHub reporters. 'q9 have nothing tosay until I see my lawyer,* The

declared.

today merely said, '"he Boysneeded a vacation anyhow." A spe-cially chutered train is taking theentire Boston Police fore to Floridatomorrow. Meanwhile crime hasshowed a slight increase in any where he mysteriously disappeared.sections of Metropolitan Boston. Aftr repeated calls to the policeI M. Cruk, a represenGtativef o he without effect, Tony Stahopolous,Open Window League made this peanut vender, retired from tMestatement, "De golden opportunity fray.is now at hand and de boys sure Nevin has ahad a large followingowes dem cops a lot." in Picadilly Circus where his plans

A typical result of-the strike was for regimenting and Itang all dei-the following: at 3:45 p.m. yester- ite integrals has met with eom-

(Continued on Page 4) siderable success.I

I

{I IREMINDER&

$ENIOR 1rA$S ENDOWYMIENTCALL AT ROOM 2-E25

STA

JOONE Li,A WARNER B$wa.

Boy SwallowsTack's to RegainMother's Love

Bell Gulping SisterOutdone by TackeaterThere was a tactful situation o:

South Boston today. Little twoyear-old Minton Twinch, son oMr. and Mrs. Roundley Twinch, oIll Memorial Drive, South Bostonwanted some attention. He decide,to do something about it and, adoctors will attest,. he succeededThe little tyke swallowed five 'sho,tacks, in the process of putting hi,foot in his mouth.

It seems that Minton, for the pasyear, has been watching his year-old sister, Merchurocrome, get althe attention in the Twinch house-hold. Six months ago she fell ofthe top of a four-story buildingand two weeks later cracked heilittle head open while scamperingthrough a revolving door. The cli-max was reached last week whenMerchurocrome swallowed a toybell.

She was taken to the hospital byher mother where doctors repairedsome other dents in her and ex-traoted the toy bell. Minton, notto be outdone by Merchurocrome,went her one hospital better. Afteremergency treatment at the Mas-sachusetts General Hospital, he wastaken to the Chelsea Naval Hos-pital where "doctors" hope to getthe five tacks out of his system.

Minton, according to relatives,decided on his method of "gettingattention" while his mother was inanother room of the Twinch house-hold. They said he obtained thetacks from a closet in the kitchenand swallowed four of them infront of his cousin, Dumbella, thir--teen, of the same address. "I wasseared, awful scared when I sawhim take the tacks whole," Dum-bella said.

Relatives say that Merchuro-crome is doing fine. Their fatheris a sword swallower by profession,having retired after a neon tubeshort circuited in his esophagus.

One out of every ten Kentuckyschoolboys knows the name of thePresident of Tanganyika. Do you?

CrowdsThrong Funn,Parties; Thousands InExperts See End Of PCops Strike AsCrime Spreads

IHub Now Open CityAs F orce Visits Fla.In an unprecedented move today,

Joseph C. Gettum, Chief Inspectorand President of Patrolman cwalof the Boston Police DepaymentNumber 345 announed that as of4: 00 p.m. yesterday, the entireBoston police department went onstrike. As the hour for' the strikedrew near, a mounting pile of policeofficer badges was seen gathering inthe Boston Common.

Officials- who could be reached

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p; 6)'Y '.a- ,6 THWX, , T El £C: Page Three

Continuing into the fifth day ofcoverage of the Cesspool Case,r Daily Reamer reporter has

on constantly on the Job, neverre than ten yards from the gap-hole in the ground. For those

aders who have not been keepingwith the tragedy, your reportersummarize the events which

rye taken place since lIr. 0. I.I61 plunged into the forty-foot-lp open cesspool in his backyardthe fashionable Brookline dis-

Ct.rriing at the scene of the trag-only twenty minutes after it

urred, your reporter immediatelyled himself in an attempt toertain the cause of Smell's tum-, As far as we were able to.ermine, after talking to the vic-

ws wife, Smell, while emptyingVe refuse into the hole, evidentlyIped on something flear the edgel una'ble to regain his balance,ped into the forty-foot pit.

Sink Second Shaft

anutes later, rescue workersm the Department of Publicflth arrived and began diggingbf.t parallel to the cesspool. We!e somewhat dubious about theflness of the second shaft, butforeman explained .that they

always followed that procedurewhen people' fell into 'manholes,pipes, and trash cans. He concludedin saying, "I know what the hellI'm doing."

Your reporter also learned fromthe Public Health Department thatSmell, a Professor in Sanitary En-gineering at the Massachusetts In-stitiite of Technology, had beenwarned two months ago to takesteps to make the hole conform tosanitary laws or else remove itfrom the premises altogether. Weoverheard the Commissioner say,"Serves the damn fool right."

Rescue Progresses RapidlyIt was only a matter of days until

the rescuers, working at a madden-ing pace, had reached the ten-footlevel. Putting down his beer longenough to make a statement to theDaily Reamer, Casper Q. Flush, vet-eran cesspool digger, remarked that,"We will spare nothing in gettingMr. Smell out safely. Burp!" An-other rescuer went on to say, "Atonly $2.46 an hour, how do theyexpect to get anybody rescued?"When questioned as to how theoperations were progressing, Flushinformed us that "It sure does stinkdown there."


PEDRO$S WHAR U STOLLKuzzin Fil sez:

Flunk now, avoidthe finel rusch.

Cambridj BrandGAS MASKS RUBBER BOOTE

{Soap Resistant) (Fayrus Brand)Uneedemfur

$3.14 P4eeztakemawa

SKEEZ 3 fur 50c.Stock up fer the semmer!Take um away! We no wantum!Ughl Paleface suckers!Getfum scalped! Ughl

PLEEZ RETERN THE PANTZ! WE'RE COLDIIPoppa sez:Hoo swiped' the boltel?

Junior sez:Hic!

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se

Be SettledAbove: Vast crowds mill around the cesspool in which 0. I. Smell hasbeen trapped for, five days as a rescue crew try leisurely to reach him.

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AecommodationsAre Consideration

An orderly "row" was created lastweek when a special investigatingeommittee appointed by Dr. Killian

discussed the possibilities of hold-ing the Freshman Camp orienta-'ion program at the Institute.

On Wednesday, at Institute Com-mnittee, the matter was discussed,and although no conclusive votetvas taken, the major expression of-pinion was against having the.amp at Technology.

The special committee, which isLeaded by Dean Thomas Pitre and.ncludes Dean Everett M. Baker,Professor B. Alden Thresher, Pro-,essor Rule, C. Jack Jacoby, '50, Claydurchell, '50, and Wesley J. Hay-,rood, '52, met last Tuesday andwill meet again Thursday.

The first and most urgent prob-.em which must be settled regard-,ig the program is that of location...n past years Freshmen Camp hasjeen run by T.C.A. at Camp Won-~eriand, Sharon, Mass.


man Camp up to that time washeld at Camp Wonderland and thefacilities for sleeping were thoughtto be filled to capacity. Many fresh-men, however, did -ot attend thecamp, and it is questionablewhether enough space is availableat the Sharon site to accommodate all of the 700 incoming freshmen.-It is the desire of President Killianand other Institute officers that allfreshmen should be able to attendthe orientation program.

Accommodations for the entirefreshman class can be provided atthe Institute through use of the

(Continued on )

clearly. He asked me to repeat; andfortunately, at this time, the girlstanding next to me answered forme after I fumbled with an answer.


"'other" girls were joking andflirting with' the various men.I had to remain aloof and silent.I This, and my unusual height (5'-11'plus 3" heels) marked me as beingout of place. Then too, wig or no,I did not quite look like a ravingbeauty; this might have been at-tributed to the relative limitedchoice of co-eds at the Institute.

I went to two of the nine frater-nity parties, and then my escortbegged-off further visits with theexcuse that I was not feeling verywell. Up to this point, no one hadguessed that my sex was anythingother than female; indeed, the Sim-mons entrant told me the followingday that while she thought that Iwas an extremely unfriendly girlwhen she stood next to me, shenever suspected that I wasn't a girluntil I was exposed orn the followingday.




/.UU sLUULAb UL bA1CU UL CU~XliavA. .LA

order to be eligible for this ECAaid, the student must be receivinghis training in science or technol-ogy. This means that the approxi-mately thirty-five Chinese studentsat the Institute will be eligible.

Ranking second only to Canada,the Chinese student body receivingtheir education in Universities andColleges in the United States num-bers close to 4000.

"JUNIOR" MUGSThose who have ordered

"Junior" mugs may pick themup on Wednesday, May 11, in thelobby of Building 10, sometimebetween 9 and 12. If this timeproves inconvenient for anyone,contact John T. Weaver, '50,Atkinson 203.

DEADLINE FOR ARRANGINGCONFLICT AND SPECIAL

EXANATIONS


Arrangements for conflictexaminations or examinationsnot listed on the May-June 1949Examination Schedule cannotbe made after 5 p.m., Wednes-day, May 11.


Starting salaries for bachelors arefrom $250 to'$310 per month; mas-

-ters $350 per month; doctors from$5000 per year, increasing with theamount of experience.Course MII

Every geology student graduatingthis June will have his choice offour or five positions, and ProfessorW. L. Whitehead expects that allundergraduates who want summerwork in geology can be placed. Pro-fessor Whitehead stated that the de-mand for geologists is growing, andthat the demand is a healthy one.The geological survey, oil and min-eral prospecting, are the fields opento geologists; and the frantic seek-ing out of natural resources to re-plenish our mineral and petroleumreserves is causing an ever increas-ing demand for trained men.

Starting salaries for bachelorswdrking in the United States arefrom $325 to $350 per month; for-eign service salaries are about $385,plus living expenses. The principaldemand in geology, however, is formasters, whose pay for continental(U. S.) service ranges from $350 to$400 per month. Doctors can ex-pect about $4800 per year from in-



CALL AT ROOM 2-125 I

Comes To Tech.7 Tech Banner

1-11oto Dy iLonigsberg

Garvin M. Moore's piane with banner "Keep Up /With THE TECH ReadTHE TECH". The plane is scheduled to fly during breaks today in the

Great Court.

The Tech is taking to the air.Tl'oday at 12 noon and again at1 p.m. a special chartered plane willtake off from the Great Court."Satan's Stepchild," piloted byGarvin M. Moore, '50. will carryThe Tech's banner aloft under thepower of a nitrated mixture ofmethanol and castor oil.




Long interested in model aircraft,"Satan's Step-Child" is iMoore's firstventure in cable controls. The nameis apparently expressive and ap-propriate since between burnt outglow-plugs, broken props, and in-nocent bystanders, the plane hashad its quota of mishaps.

Ignition Trouble'No Course XVI man, Garvin has

not had the confusions of aero-dynamic formulas to cope'with.Typically, the ignition system hascaused the greatest trouble. He is


Editorial

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I 3@e MelemmE Drive

Famoua s --Toods Ber Fl0Ay Years

II-

THE PANT%Auntie Pasto sez:

Waif fill finals.

Hunters speshel

If youve had bad aim

latelee get this

88 M ELIDEETER GUNT $88.00(Only a buck a millimeetre!)

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T HE TE' CH Ptriday., May

'Page Six


geles, Cal., May 2; VI (S.Mi., Ph.D.)The Glenn L. Martin Compiany, Bal-


Fort Worth, Texas, May 2; XVI,II (S.M., Ph.D.)


The Warner & Swasey Co., Cleve-land, Ohio, IvMay 3; II, XV.

Bendix Radio, Baltimore, Md., May4, VI.e

Abraham & Straus, Inc., Brooklyn,N. Y., May 5; XV, II, VI.

Graydon, Smith & Co., Boston,,Mass., May 6; II, VI.

Crown Zellerbach Corp., Portland,Oregon, May 6; II.


Baldwin Locomotive, Philadelphia,Pa., May 11; II, VI.

Kimberly-Clark Corp., Neenah, Wis.,May 13; X, VI, II, XV.Companies to contact by letter:

Beryllium Corp., Reading, Pa.; V, X,XII.

Landers Frary & Clark, New Brit-aiOn Conn.; XV.

VOL. L= 'FDAY, 'MY 6, 1949 NO. 26MANAGING BOALD

G Manager .............................................. Norman B. Champ, Jr., '50Buialownes n .......sg..-.....................................Da..d . Be.nenson. '50

tar . . . ..o .s~wv~o~e@@@****e*@*@@o~e*@tes~w~voo**e*vSander 'Rubn. '50j tmla ug Editor ... . ..................................................avd i elner, '50

EDITORSAlgnments ............. Bran I. e Features ........ Marvin C. Grossman. '1

A sa't ...... Ro.bert IL Luriet , 52 ...... Edward B. Stringham, '51Donald A. Young, '50 Herbert D. Limer, '50

Exchanne . ........... George H. Myers, '51 Photography ........ Paul Gdhardt, '49Bpo'ta ............... Leo Sartorl, '50 News ............ Willam R. ler, '51Sports Asst ..... Eugene S. Lubarsky, '51 Assoc. Ed .......... John R. Sevler, '51

MANAGERA.dvertlag ........ :,David A. Jamin, '51 Treasurer . A. .Ort. '51

Ass't . ... George Brombeld '51 Publicity .......... Robert E. Bagnall, '50Circulatlon .... Sheldon B. HerakovItz,, '51 Office T.omas G. Hagaz '51

Assoc. for Sales ... Warren Marcus, '50 Personnel .... ....... David Une, '50TAFT N ERS

Mare L. Aelion, '51: Robert B. Astrachan, '52; Lydia R. Bacot, '52: Lewls Berger, '500 MortonBosniak, '51; Annette G. Bosquet. '52; WIllam P. Chandler, '52; Charles F. Cordes, '51;Walter E. Dietz, '52; John A. Dixon, '62- Robert T. Dorris, '52; William W. Dunn, '52;Herbert Elsenberg, '52; Hasbrouck Fletcher, '51; tienard E. Glenn, '50; Peter T. Gomotos,'60; Mitchel E. Green, '52; Ernest A. Grunsfeld., '52; Charles A. lonigsberg, '52: Robert W.Jeffrey, '52; Richard H. Koenig, '$0: Howard K. Kothe, '49; Gerald F. Laufs, 'b2; John C.Lowry, '52; Jerome Melslim, '52; George L. Mellor, '52; Edward B. Mikrut, '50; James H.Murray, '52- Robert L. Nesbltt, '49; John B. Schutt, '51; Paul 2. Seever, 52; Richard H.Silverman, '.52; Nathan H. Sivin, '52; John B. Ten Eyck, '52; Newell 3. Trask, '52; Rodger K.Vance, '52Z; Robert F. Walsh, '52; George I. Weiss, '52.

EDITORIAL BOARDDale 0. Cooper, '51; Fred randerschmidt, '51.

OF'FICES OF THE TECHNews and Editorial-Room 307. Walker Memorial. Cambridge, Mass.

Telephones Et rkland 7-1881, 7-1882Business--Room 335, Walker Memorial. Telephone KIrkland 7-i881.Mail Subscription $3.00 per year, $5.00 for two years.Publlshed every Tuesday and Friday during college year, except during college vacation.Entered as second class matter December 9, 1944, at the Post Office, at Boston, Mass.,

tUnder the Act of March 31, 1879.Represented for national advertising by National Advertising Service, Inc., College Pub-

tshers Representative, 420 Madison Ave., New York, N. Y.

Night Editor: Thomas G. Hagan, '51Assistant Night Editor: Newell J. Trask, '52

RESCUING THE RAILROADThe Old Boloney branch of the Insti;ute Railroad, which

runs through Huntington Hall, has been losing money at therate of half a million dollars a day for the past three and ahalf years. The situation has become the disgrace of the Insti-tute, and should be remedied at once. We suggest the followingmeasures be taken immediately.

Operation of the railroad should be taken out of the handsof the inefficient Physics Department and a special inter-departmental commission be set up to take over. The newcommission, to be known as the Physics Transit Authority,should have representatives of not only the Physics andElectrical Engineering Departments but also the BusinessAdministration and Economics Departments. This new em-phasis on the humanities courses should go far towards recti-fying the over:technical management of the road.

An imaginative management would no doubt inaugurateseveral schemes to effect economies and increase revenue. Onesuch idea that comes to mind is based on the carrying capacityof the line which is now sadly underutilized. At present, freightforms the only payload, and the amount of mechanical, electri-cal and optical equipment shipped in this area does not comenear to paying the overhead charges. It would be thereforewise to investigate the possibility of instituting a passengerservice. Surely the large numbers of commuters, especiallyamong the freshmen and sophomores, portend that this maybecome an important source of revenue.

President Killian should exert his authority and commencecondemnation proceedings at once and deliver the railroadinto the hands of a competent P.T.A.

COLLEGIATE DISGRACEOur columns carry the story of a group of Institute stu-

debnts who have disguised a boy as a girl and entered her ina local beauty contest, which she won. We frown upon, scowlat' and deplore such carryings on. The scheme is not only againstGyd's law and the laws of this glorious commonwealth (which,G&d save), but it offends our sensibilities deeply.

SEES WAR?To the Editor:

What are we waiting for? I saydrop the bomb now. Hitler knewwhat the score was.

Pro Bono PublicoSEES REDYou louse:

I swallowed ten tacks five yearsago. Why didn't I make Page -17

Jonathan Twinch, Aged 4Sorry--Ed.

SEES FLYING SAUCERDear Sir:

I saw a flying saucer yesterday.It was red.

Name withheld by request.

SEES ERRORMy Dear Sir:

While perusing and inspectingyesterday's edition, I observed andinvestigated what I believe to be anerror.

The twenty-third and last Presi-dent was Benjamin Harrison andnot Harrison Benjamin as statedand declared on pages 1 and 47. Itrust that my serendipitious dis-covery and my sesquipedalianismwill cause you no embarrassmentand discomfort.

William Talcolm, Lord Hailstone(Baron of Shahpur in the Pun-jab and Newport Pagnell In

Buckinghamshire.)Please read the article again fer

what it DID say.-Ed.SEESEditor, dear:

While driving by Memorial Drivethe other evening -I counted 27couples in cars. Shocking!

Miss Prunella Jane Maloney

Strike(Continued from Page 2)

day a woman was seen runningdown the street with four men afterher. Screaming, "Help, police,police," she attracted the attentionof a nearby officer, who upon notic-ing the plight, immediately startedchasing the damsel himself.

T e ~~~~~~~~~~~o u~~~~~~!. Te!]ing You

By PEGLEG EASTLYThe Deacon Hill Ladies SW4

has brought pressure on the,

government to ban one of the lonewspapers, namely the Reamer, because of its excess of suggestive passages in its pagImmediately following the Deeconesses' petition, the Peek Snitch Society of Boston issued t.statement: "Damoit, they beatagain."

Naturally, we of the Daily Reamecannot sit back and take sueabuse, without protest. We arproud of ourselves with publish:iuncensored journalism in the natof freedom, justice, anti-Commt,nistic ideals, and James MichadBurley. We feel sure that the puliec agrees with us in our lack virestrictive tendencies, injustl.Communistic ideals, propagandLand Plan E.

Of course, we must admit that,!present the facts as they are, wh.is unusual for newspapers in geieral. Do the ladies of Deacon ELalways want to look at the wor:through rose-colored glasses? Athey afraid to teach their childrethe facts of life? We feel that itour duty to the public to preserthese facts as they are, pleasantunpleasant. In conclusion, we horthat the courts and judges will rmember which party this pap,supports.

(w L O W E R

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liticos, Gangstersbatest Boston Spoils

the wake of a crime wavesed by the police strike, Policeief Ginsburg in collaborationI the city council and Mayorsley served notice on all gangs-sin the area with the terse warn-

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t on.".e announcement was received'I misgivings in gangland head-

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quarters. "This constitutes a 100%rise in our costs of doing business,"said Clarence Raltonstall, attorneyfor Larceny Incorporated, and theWatch and Wait Society.

Becoming abusive in his criticismof Larceny Incorporated, the mayorthreatened to start a competingorganization built around the exist-ing police force. Raltonstall saidthat such action would precipitatea crisis, as the national union haspledged full cooperation lest othercommunities try to up the ante.

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-I

Beauty Contest(Continued from Page 1)

"In Sandra I see real beauty, fromthe shoes right up. And what adistinguished face, the real newlook. And those bushy eyebrows,so irresistible. Miss Rubin will gofar, yes indeed, very far."

It was reported later tonight that

j RUNNER-UP B:EAUTYi-: . ,-- ; '~

·r'.- ;: . ,

i

Above: Miss Archaeology of 1949,who took second place in the BostonUniversity New England Co-edbeauty contest on Saturday. Shewas also judged best in the thirty-

nine inch class.

Miss Rubin was going far on a rail,accompanied by a shouting mob ofB.U. hoodlums wielding containersof tar and feathers. The report isas yet unconfirmed.

Delerman Sylwyn, editor of theBoston University News and spon-sor at Logan Airport, in a master-piece of understatement said,"We've been duped."

Miss Rubin was finally reachedat her home, but due to a severecase of laryngitis, was unable tocomment on the glory heaped uponher.

HIM n raitorial .

t0i ·bcond traig t.

Co00- iedd .F X ag ~dc ~A~aar e c §42aaslTP BP. troversmr

FEIBe SetRedSELING AROUND IN THE UNKNOWN -- Accommodations

By WALLY COMFORT

Professor Weenee, creator of Ky-berattics, has given birth to a newscience. The main difficulty withKyberattics was the difficulty ofproducing control units to run in-dustry, also, the mental stability ofthe mechanisms was expected tocause hardships. With his keenmind, the professor worked outa brilliant solution-Corporate In-tercourse and Reproduction.

By his plan, he expects to elimi-inate difficulty after two workingmodels are completed. "Just likethe birds and bees," he commented.The result is attained by the use ofa complex arrangement of bananaplugs and female sockets. Neurosesshould be considerably diminished.

Because of its technical difficul-ties, novices cannot be expected tounderstand the full import and ap-plications of the new science. Onlyfour people in the entire worldreally comprehend the remarkableimplications of kyberattics, it isreported. These include ProfessorWeenee, Mrs. Weenee (who helpedgive birth to the new science, theProfessor's 18-year-old daughter,and my secretary.

It Is Believed!It is believed that kyberattics Will

have a profound impact on allother sciences, especially chemurgy,agronomy, philology, taxonomy, andspeleology. "The whole thing oc-curred to me," said ProfessorWeenee in a little chat I had withhim in a streetcar, "while browsingthrough the July, 1905, number ofAnnalen des Physik in Chinesetranslation."

Mr. Comfort, distinguished scien-tific writer of the REAMER, isauthor of "We May Have to Hide,"a simplified analysis of the atomicbomb problem.

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Are ConsiderationAn orderly "row" was created last

week when a special investigatintgcommittee appointed by Dr. KWltandiscussed the possibilities of hold-ing the Freshman Camp orienta-tion program at the Institute.

On Wednesday, at Institute Com--nmittee, the matter was discussed,

and although no conclusive votewas taken, the major expression ofopinion was against having the-amp at Technology.

The special committee, which isheaded by Dean Thomas Pitre andincludes Dean Everett M. Baker,Professor B. Alden Thresher, Pro-lessor Rule, C. Jack Jacoby, '50, Claydurchell, '50, and Wesley J. Hay-wood, '52, met last Tuesday andwill meet again Thursday.

The first and most urgent prob-lem which must -be settied regard-.ng the program is that of location...n past years Freshmen Camp hasjeen run by T.C.A. at Camp Won-Aerland, Sharon, Mass.


man Camp up to that time washeld at Camp Wonderland and thefacilities for sleeping were thoughtto be filled to capacity. Many fresh-men, however, did not attend thecamp, and it is questionablewhether enough space is availableat the Sharon site to acconmmodate _all of the 7100 inc¢ming freshmen.It is the desire of President KiUianand other Institute officers that allfreshmen should be able to attendthe orientation program.



clearly. He asked me to repeat anncfortunately, at this time, the girlstanding next to me answered forme after I fumbled with an answer.


"other" girls were joking andflirting with the various men.I had to remain aloof and silent.This, and my unusual height (5'-11"plus 3" heelS) marked me as beingout of place. Then too, wig or no,I did not quite look like a ravingbeauty; this might have been at-tributed to the relative limitedchoice of co-eds at the Institute.

I went to two of the nine frater-nity parties, and then my escortbegged-off further visits with theexcuse that I vras not feeling verywell. Up to this point, no one hadguessed that my sex was anythingother than female; indeed, the Sim-mons entrant told me the followingday that while she thought that Iwas an extremely unfriendly girlwhen she stood next to me, shenever suspected that I wasn't a girluntil I was exposed on the followingday.



(Continued on )

tDUU b1UUUCLiJLZ VI WIJ. VUUtv.v-. -I

order to be eligible for this ECAaid, the student must be receivinghis trairing in science or technol-ogy. This means that the approxi-mately thirty-five Chinese studentsat -the Institute will be eligible.

Ranking second only to Canada,the Chinese student body receivingtheir education in Universities andColleges in the United States num-bers close to 4000.

"JUNIOR" MUGS

Those who have ordered"Junior" mugs maiy pick themup on Wednesday, May 11, in thelobby of B;uilding 10, sometimebetween 9 and 12. If this timeproves inconvenient for anyone,contact John T. Weaver, '50,Atkiinson 203.

DEADLINE FOR ARRANGENGCONFLICT AND SP1ECAL

E N~ AMDNSThe deadline for submitting

requests for special and conflictexaminations this term will BeWednesday, May 11.

Arrangements for conflictexaminations or examinationsnot listed on the BMay-June 1949Examination Schedule cannotbe made after 5 pin., Wednes-day, May 11.


Starting salaries for bachelors arefrom $250 to $310 per month; mas-'-ters $350 per month; doctors from$5000 per year, increasing with theamount of experience.Course XII

Every geology student graduatingthis Jdne will have his choice offour or five positions, and ProfessorW. L. Whitehead expects that allundergraduates who want summer.work in geology can be placed. Pro-fessor Whitehead stated that the de-mand for geologists is growing, andthat the demand is a healthy one.The geological survey, oil and min-eral prospecting, are the fields opento geologists; and the frantic seek-ing out of natural resources to re-plenish our mineral and petroleumreserves is causing an ever increas-ing demand for trained men.

Starting salaries for bachelorsworking in the United States arefrom $325 to $350 per month; for-eign service salaries are about $385,plus living expenses. The principaldemand in geology, however, Is formasters, whose pay for continental(U. S.) service ranges from $350 to$400 per month. Doctors can ex-pect about $4800 per year from in-



CALL AT ROOM 2-125

relloto Dy nmonugsberg

Garvin M. Moore's plane with banner "Keep Up With THE TECH RedTHE TECH". The plane is scheduled to fly during breaks today in the

Great Court.

The Tech is taking to the air.Today at 12 noon and again at1 p.m.. a special chartered plane willtake off from the Great Court."Satan's Stepchild," piloted byGa.rvin M. Moore, '50, will carryThe Tech's banner aloft under thepower of a nitrated mixture ofmethanol and castor oil.

A Carl Goldberg Nifty, the planeis 28" in length, with a 23" wingspan and is powered by a class Bengine. Maneuvers are controlledthrough a 35' cable. The trailingbanner is the invention of TheTech's research staff. Gauze, stab-ilized with two pennies and alounge-bar cup, keep the ad levelin flight. The only difficulty is thespeed of the plane which ap-proaches.60 miles per hour. Spec-tators will have to look quickly toread the text.



Long interested in model aircraft,"Satan's Step-Child" is Moore's firstventure in cable controls. The nameis apparently expressive and ap-propriate since between burnt outglow-plugs, broken props, and in-nocent bystanders, the plane hashad its quota of mishaps.


not had the confusions of aero-dynamic formulas to cope'with.Typically, the ignition system hascaused the greatest trouble. He is


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PLACEMENT IINFORMATION

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VTL I F O TIONTo students who wear eyeglasses for visua eflciency and for corrective purposes.It is important that son take proper measures to protect your visman dluring thesummer against the harmful effects of the sun on sensitive eyes. Therefore I suggestyou dmplHcate your prescription "in sun-glasses" unslg Calobar or Rayban Reams,

optical science's greatesst contribution for the effactive absorption of lnftflor raysand glare of the sun.

Avail yourself of the facilites of your own mnedlical clitnlo--there you we obtncompetent ophthalmie advice and examlnation.

L�i�BY�L�a�ij��''' I c -'--- - -U~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A

_wMOTHE

IANTWORTH' S ADVICEDear Mother Aintworth:

I have a problem. MVy problem isgetting bigger every day. Will youhelp me? I don't know what to do,where to turn. I am lost in confu-sion. I've got troubles.

zMy trouble began (but I didn'tknow it) when I met Joe at a dance.He was a divine dancer. He couldeven samba. I couldn't, but hecould. We seemed made for eachother. We danced together all eve-ning. When he took me home thatfirst night, he kissed me! It waswonderful! The next day we weremarried.

Joe didn't have a job, but thatdidn't worry him much. He was al-ways hiappy and gay. He was awonderful husband-he danced sowonderfully. My parents found outthat I was maxrried, and they hadthe marriage annulled because Iwas only sixteen. Joe was sorry,but he is still happy and gay.

Joe says he tlfinks it will be bet-ter if I didn't see him.much any-more. He's probably dancing withother girls now, and I feel so allalone. Joe was such a wonderfuldancer. I miss him.

After I stopped seeing Joe mytroubles really began. And thetrouble is getting bigger and bigger.The doctor thinks it will be twins.

I haven't told my .rxents about ityet. I can't locate Joe and tell himbecause he doesn't live where heused to.

I would like to forget Joe, and getreadjusted like the psychologists inthe papers always say I should, butwith my ,problem it ain't easy. Iwant to be happy and gay, like Joeprobably is, but I don't seem tohave as much fun as I used to. Iam depressed. I am lonesome and Iwish Joe would come back. He was

F

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2-4 a.m. M.I.T.4-6 a.m. Boston University6-8 a.m. Tufts College

. 4-6 p-m. Harvard UniversityIn giving these fndings, chair-

man WE Bitchell stated that Har-vard .completed arrangements forthe use of vice in the afternoononly after great expense to the uni-versity. Equipment necessary foruse of vice, he continued, is in muchbetter condition in the early morm-ing hours than the late afternoon.To obtain it in the afternoon there-fore results in greater expense withthe likelihood of inferior tuality.

A Radcliffe representative raisedthe question: "Don't the partici-pants complain because of lack ofsleep and coldness of the earlymorning hours?" . This ticklishquestion was settled by introducingher to the Wellesley delegate andshowing the two to a nearby con-ference room.

An authority on the nUtter fromBoston University explained that"action on the question is impos-sible because the forces controllingthe situation are stationed beyondthe scope of this body. 1t has be-come a well-known Boston custom,"he averred, and with that sat down.

In response to a final query onthe origin of this custom, Bitchellreplied that it has been defnitelytraced to Scandinavia, althoughcertain experts on the subject de-clare that it originated one eveningin. the first-known garden in hu-man history.

Bean Daker spoke on the re-sponsibilities of students followingdiscussion on the report of theCommittee on the Use of Ice in theBoston Area-specifically as it re-lated to that in the Boston Garden.

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ICompanies to be at the Institute.

North American Aviation, Los An-geles, Cal., May 2; VI: (S.M., PhD.)

The Glenn L. Martin Company, Bal-timore, Md., May 2; XVI, VI, II, I.

Consolidated Vultee Aircraft Corp.,Fort Worth, Texas, May 2; XVI,II (S.M., Ph.D.)


The VWarnex & Swasey Co., Cleve-land, Ohio, May 3; II, XV.

Bendix Radio, Baltimore, Md., May4, VI.

Abraham & Straus, Inc., Brooklyn,N. Y., May 5; XV, II, VI.

Graydon, Smith & Co., Boston,Mass., May 6; II, VI.

Crown Zellerbach Corp., Portland,Oregon, May 6; II.


Baldwin Locomotive, Philadelphia,Pa., May 11; I, VI.

Kimberly-Clark Corp., Neenah, Wis.,May 13; X, VI, IU, XV.Companies to contact by letter:

Beryllium Corp., Reading, Pa.; V, X,Xm.

Landers Frary & Clark, New Brit-ain, Conn.; xV.

CA3T oF R.aATEq sSPiglet ..... Terence VOi~other Sow ............ .Terence F01WThe Farmer .............Terene The FarmeeBs Daughter . .Terence FoWThe Traveling Salesman Terence

1Cercnce PM1The Justtce of the Peace ,

Terence FoThe Butcher ............ Terence POEProduced by ............ Terence FoDirected by ............. Terence PoCostumes by ............ Terence FoTicket Seller ..... Terence F0PWritten by .,.............Terene e OProm a story by Terence FollowerAdditional Dialogue br c. Gro

IMMMIn- C. r

such ,a show, we ask? 'Whythey restricttheir topics to Wrand to horses? The W est Cmovie colony would do well to some lessons from Terencelower's techniques. Everyone plauded the brilliant ispithat led him to use one set thT0out the show, and all agreedFollower's farm provided elthe right ~ckground. -I

Another idea worthy of grgadmiration was that of using ilanguage whatever in the dia sreplacing the outdated wordssyllables by grunts andi Dins; hgexpressive an ordinary oink canespecially when uttered bymagic lips of Terence Followe~Truly, as H. Follower said,but a series of oinks. Take a lsHollywood.

PrELETAt last, the long-awaited movie

import from Lictenstein hasarrived, and is now showing in theAthens of America, where the in-habitants of the Most Cultured Cityin the world can now see it. Every-one should see 'Piglet," a wonder-ful saga of Real LUfe.

Written, directed, produced, andacted ,by Terence Follower, thegreat ,Lichtensteinian genius, '?ig-let" gives us a true glimpse of Lifein a ninth century barnyard. I-owdifficult it is to describe the won-derful qualities of realism coupledwith a fairy-tale-like dreaminess,the gay sadness and the melancholyjoy of '"iglet!" The audience satentranced through the entire show,from the birth to the slaughter-house. One 'even thought to smellthe characters as they acted,although it is said that the sameodor resided in the theatre beforethis picture was shown.

Why can't IIollywood produce

a wonderful dwmcer.Mrs. Aintworth, what shall do?

I can't solve it alone. My parentsare unsympathetic. Joe is some-where else, probably being happyand gay. How can I readjust myselfto my condition? Will you help me?Tell me what to do.

Troubled

You, do indeed have a problem. Ican sympathize with you: The an-swer to your problem is not easy,and for you to become successfullyreadjusted willH take time, but my advice is this: First, learn to samba.|Second, find out where Joe lives andarrange with a friend to meet himr


Cesspool(Continued from Page 3)

Meanwhile, at the surface, Smell'sfamily had been attempting to keepin contact with the unfortunatevictim, who was overheard to sayon ,the second dlay, "Phhew." Effortswere made to pass food down toSmell on the third day but met withfailure when the victim repliedthat he wasn't hungry.

After a one-day's delay in order(Contitued on Page 8)

Eadarg lPlaces

Distinctive decor .. friendlyinformal, yet dignified atmosphere ... men wariters . .. linentable service . . . wide varleyon menus . e. . ellent bao.

Open Diy ill 00 P.M.Open Doily Till g:g0 P.M, I

$

Favorite spot for radio, newspaper, theatre, spors, and Tec

crowd.

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"In the alley off Amy btejYDBefy behinird the Acstor Theace

Bing your presgPetion to

ALFmD LEWIS COUSINEAU,MASTER IN OPI'HTHAI OPTICS

D.O.484 ommnonwealth Ave. PhoneM: ]B E E04B

Hour~s: g:S0 a.m. to :0 Epmn.KenErore Squae, Boston or by mpr tt

2e% ]DISCOUNJ TO AmIr M.I.T. STIUDENTS , FACULTY, AN iD PER N

STIA

e"OE LiWARNER bt ,.,,.

tlarvard FoundTo Stand AloneIn PM Use of Vice

Latest reports from the Commit-tee on the Use of Vice in the BostonArea were presented at the recentStudent Government Council meet-ing held in" Huntington Hall andshow the following results:

e Tops- wITI

A Famous Boston

"For me ther,

cigarett~e that'

and~ that's CH

yMaY6 194B L Ta 0e

ANALYZER PRODUCES MONSTROSITY

ve: The first publicly released picture of the thinking machineiwing a humann Just visible are a pair of legs emerging. So far the

machine has only produced male offspring.

chine(continued jrolm Page 1)

lds of hamburger meat hastilyained from the food technollab. Then with a mysteriousIt in his eye, he pulled a large

or.A Man Is Born

he machine gave a low rumble,dgh pitched haum and finally an

some gnashing of gears. Theea men present were transfixedthey held their eyes on a slotrked "Answers Out Here." Withwrenching shriek the deviceled a pair of bare feet throughslot, and with a final gentle

ip" issued a full grown man.)tographer Stully caught a pic-

of the dramatic event.men though the experiment was

tlestone in history, it was a fail-, Immediately after his birth-Invention- the man, physicallysal except for an unusuallyle head, was left in the care of

FoodReasonably Priced

ancheons and DinnersVisit Our Lounge Bar

S Massahusetts Avenue, Boston

clearly. He asked me to repeatfortunately, at this time, thestanding next to me answerecme after I fumbled with an ani

Tall and AloofOf course, during.this time,

"other" girls were jokingflirting with the variousI had to remain aloof and siThis, and my unusual height (5plus 3" heels) marked me as bout of place. Then too, wig o:I did not quite look like a rabeauty; this might have beentributed to the relative linchoice of co-eds at the Institut

TEr c,,

the two newsmen while Dr. Fortz ....dashed down to report his find tothe Office of Buildings and Power. FuiDuring the doctor's brief absencethe man became active and started phento utter incoherent gibberish. Be- Co:ginning in a slow moan, he mum- beenbled something like "the closed Pravsurface inter girl of beesubend dee doness is queue." funn

The photographer looked at the ism.reporter with a meaningful look. for

ZerglMan Registers Disgust Bil

With courage that is only ordi- | sportnary in the ranks -of Reamer em- I erosiployees, reporter Smlatz asked the in g itraving man "What are you doing sawhere?" The machine-made human wealtlooked up and noticed the men for distr!the first time, letting out a wail declaand gnashing his teeth. With hate to sein his voice he muttered, "Oh, these Brazanthropomorphic teleological de- undeoterninists."

The reporter looked at the pho- AdRvtographer with a look full of mean-ing. a at a

Realizing that the future of man- can:Bind lay in his hands, Smlatz acted to bewith amazing calm. He whipped a SincejLuger from his tunic and aimed whensaid Luger Pat the insidious creature shomon the floor. In an instant it was By tiall over. The horrible perversion of you 'mature was dead. Once again civil- fullyized man had vindicated himself. J SoScience had gone -too far. ing n

tand 25W0 students of their education. ingirl order to be eligible for this ECA

d for aid, the student must be receivingswer. his training in science or technol-

ogy. This means that the approxi-mately thirty-five Chinese students

the at .the Institute will be eligible.and Ranking second only to Canada,

men. the Chinese student body receivingilent. their education in Universities and-11 I Colleges in the United States num-

beLng bets close to 4000.ir no,Lvingi at-titedLe.

I went to two of the nine frater-nity parties, and then my escortbegged-off further visits with theexcuse that I was not feeling verywell. Up to this point, no one hadguessed that my sex was anythingother than female; indeed, the Sim-mons entrant told me the followingday that while she thought that Iwas an extremely unfriendly girlwhen she stood next to me, shenever suspected that I wasn't a girluntil I was exposed on the followingday.




"JUNIOR" MUGS

Those who have ordered"Junior" mugs may pick themup on Wednesday, May 11, in thelobby of Building 10, sometimebetween 9 and 12. If this timeproves inconvenient for anyone,contact John T. Weaver, '50,Atkinson 203.

DEADLINE FOR ARRANGINGCONFLICT AND SPECIAL

EXAMKNAT~ONS


Arrangements for conflictexans or examinations or examinationsnot listed on the May-June 1949Examination Schedule cannotbe made after 5 prm., Wednes-day, May 11.

Page Seven

urocher Mayuan Rub Teaminch To Cop. Series,'ennant, Says Sartoriprinted from La.st Year's Edition

a sensational news releaseh rocked the baseball worlds heels, it was announced todayLeo Durocher, erstwhile "bad-of the Dodgers and Giants, is ng to Boston to manage thes. Willie Northworth, managerie Raves, has been uncondi-lly released and has reportedly

-d with an unnamed Technicaltution on the banks of theles River. Of course, the re-may be false.oe Daily Reamer wishes to make ear that any uncomplimentarys we may have printed about IDurocher in the past were Iin jest. We have always hadlighest regard forthe capabil-and sound baseball judgment

Er. Durocher, and feel confi-; that he will lead our gloriouses to the pennant they deserve.for Northworth, the bum, alla-ve to say is "good riddance."

le we may have sometimesAed Northworth In our columns,realize now his extreme short-ngs.

GIel (Continued from Page 2)

aomenally high specific gravity.nments on the clubs have alsoreceived from Russia where

da, in a dispatch heard in Lon-by Reuters, claimed that theels meant the end of capital-It also claimed that the idea

the clubs was originated byei F. Flopowsky of Leningrad.11 Nottingham, widely readts columnist, deplored the gen-ty of the wealthy in propagat-the funnel principle and fore-the day when the world'sIth might possibly be. evenly

ibuted. Folsom A. Sockifeller&red in a PU dispatch, "We plan Iit up a chain of funnel clubs inil as a means of helping theardeveloped area."

vice(Continued from Page 6)

dance. When he sees that younow samba too, Joe will wanta happy and gay with you again.e you seem to be happy onlym you are with Joe, I think youId be with Joe. Elope with him.the time your parents find out,will be eighteen years old, andr responsible for your actions.I say go, go to your gay dane-

man--and be happy, be gay!

with personal connections cancure them.

Starting salaries for bachelorsfrom $250 to $310 per month; nr-ters $350 per month; doctors fh$500 per year, increasing withamount of experience.Course XII

Every geology student gradualthis June will have his choicefour or five positions, and Profe:W. L. Whitehead expects thatundergraduates who want sum:work in geology can be placed. Ifessor Whitehead stated that themand for geologists is growing,that the demand is a healthy iThe geological survey, oil and neral prospecting, are the fields oto geologists; and the frantic sEing out of natural resources toplenish our mineral and petrolEreserves is causing an ever incr(ing demand for trained men.

Starting salaries for bacheworking in the United Statesfrom $325 to $350 per month; Jeign service salaries are about $plus living expenses. The princdemand in geology, however, ismasters, whose pay for continei(U. S.) service ranges from $354$400 per month. Doctors canpeet about $4800 per year from



CALL AT ROOM 2-125

___1- -- ---

I~L)II TODAY'S

By ELY KAUFMA.N

WE8TS-9 5H-5 4 3 2Do-- a 5C-10 4 2

NOITHS-A J 10 7 0E--& 8 7 6I)--A. 30--6 5

SOUTHs-sH-K Q 5 10D--K Q 7--A K 9 8

I n Editorial

ond Straig

S-K Q 4 8 2H-AD-- 10 4 2C-AQ 7 3

The Scene: 8.461 Lecture, earlylast fall.

The bidding:South: One Heart.West: (after some hesitation) Pass.North: One Spade.EaSt: Pass.South: Two' Clubs.North: (determined) Two Spades.South: (hopefully) Three Dia-

monds?North: (determined) Three Spades.South: (who wants to play the

hand, sheepishly) Three Hearts!West: (triumphantly) InsutfJcient

Bid!South: (who has to make his bid

sumfcient while his partner isbarred from the bidding) Oh hell!Seven Hearts.

East: (looking at his Ace of Hearts)D-Double.

South: (who is in Course XV andnot to be intimnidated) Redouble.All pass.

The play:West leads the nine of Spades.

South takes the Ace, cashes theAce of Diamonds, leads a lowDiamond to his King, and casheshis Ace and King of Clubs. He thenruffs a thirc club in dummy, ruffsa Spade in his hand, another Clubin dummy, and another Spade inhis hand. Declarer now trumps hisgood Queen of Diamonds, and leadsanother Spade from dummy.

At this point East, a visiting Har-yard man, finds that he has fourcards left and dummy only thiree.A fight results, broken up by the lec-turer's suggestion that a rulebookbe consulted. The only rule bookavailable is a 1931 edition fromWalker in which it is stated that,if an irregularity in the deal isdiscovered after the 10th trick, thehand must be played out as normal.South now gleefully crossruffsDiamonds and Spades for the lastthree tricks while West underruffs.East, who has to follow suit andbecomes the only man in historyever to go to sleep with an Ace ofTrumps, quietly steps outside andshloots himself.

troversBe $et d

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AccommodationsAre Consideration

An orderly "row" was created lastweek when a special investigatingcommittee appointed by Dr. Killiandiscussed the possibilities of hold-ing the Freshman Camp orienta-,ion program at the Institute,

On Wednesday, at Institute Com-mittee, the matter was discussed,and although no conclusive votewas taken, the major expression ofopinion was against having the.amp at Technology.

The special committee, which isheaded by Dean Thomas IPitre andincludes Dear Everett M. Baker,

Professor B. Alden Thresher, Pro-±essor Rule, C. Jack Jacoby, '50, Clay3lurchell, '50, and Wesley J. IHay-wvood, '52, met last Tuesday andwill meet again Thursday.

The first and most urgent prob-,em which must be settled regard-.ng the program is that of location..n past years Freshmen Camp hasJeen run by T.C.A. at Camp Won-,erLand, Sharon, Mass.


man Camp up to that time washeld at Camp Wonderland and thefacilities for sleeping were thoughtto be filled to capacity. Many fresh-men, however, did not attend thecamp, and it is questionablewhether enough space is availableat the Sharon site to accommodateall of the 700 inco1ming freshmen.It is the desire of President Killianand other Institute officers that allfreshmen should be able to attendthe orientation program.



Coes To Techrh Tech Banner

hllouto Dy nioulgsuerg

Garvin M. Moore's plane with banner "Keep 'Up With THE TECH ReadTHE TECH". The plane is scheduled to fly during breaks today in the

Great Court.

The Tech is taking to the air.Today at 12 noon and again at1 p.m. a special chartered plane willtake off from the Great Court."Satan's Stepchild," piloted byGarvin M. Moore, '50, will carryThe Tech's banner aloft under thepower of a nitrated mixture ofmethanol and castor oil.




Long interested in model aircraft,"Satan's Step-Child" is Moore's firstventure in cable controls. The nameis apparently expressive and ap-propriate since between burnt outglow-plugs, broken props, and in-nocent bystanders, the plane hashad its quota of mishaps.


not had the confusions of aero-dynamic formulas to cope 'with.Typically, the ignition system hascaused the greatest trouble. He is


cal Home-Cooked

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_Page Six

PLAC134EIINFOROTIN 1


geles, Cal., May 2; VI (S.M., Ph.D.)The Glenn L. Martin Comipany, Bal-


Fort Worth, Texas, May 2; XVI,II (S.M., Ph.D.)


The Warner & Swasey Co., Cleve-land, Ohio, May 3; II, XV.

Bendix Radio, Baltnmore, Md., May4, VI.

Abraham & Straus, Inc., Brooklyn,N. Y., lay 5; XV, II, VI.

Graydon, Smith &- Co., Boston,,Mass., May 6; II, VI.

Crown ZeUerbach Corp., Portland,Oregon, May 6; II.


Baldwin Locomotive, Philadelphia,Pa., May 11; LU, VI.

Kimberly-Clark Corp., Neenah, Wis.,May 13; X, VI, II, XV.Companies to contact by letter:

Beryllium Corp., Reading, Pa.; V, X,XI.

Landers Frary & Clark, New Brit-ain, Conn.; XV.

EVENTFUL -CALENDARSaturday, 3y 7

rlectical Engineering Collo-quium: The necessity of utilzngthe dfferential analyser in thedesign of new, never win, pin ballmachines. Walker Basement, 5:00p.n.

Faculty Pistol Club: RadclifeAseassination Meeting, Rifle Ranige,Midnight.

Monday, mbay 9Technological Dames, beer brawl

and gossip gathering, E. R. Room,8:00 pm.

Funnel Club Meeting (Put in$2000, and get sure return of $1.50),D. L. Rhine's office, any old time.

Freshman orientation lecture bymnembers of Sophomore Class, whipsand stirrup punps supplied, Bar-racks, 10:00 pm.

Combined meeting of Physics andMathematics Societies: study of liveellipsoidal surfaces by braille sys-tem,-Boston Common, 3:00 am.

Corporation Meeting, talk onsinpUcity of firing professors,Building 1, 5:00 pm.

Tuesday, May 10Civil and Sanitary Engineering

Department: Applications of hy-draulic engineering to life. Mar-garet Cheney Room, 4:30 p.m.

Food Technology Colloquium:Methods of synthesizing still moreof the common Walker dishes,Building 102, 5:00 p.m.

T.CA clothing drive. All typesof Men's and Women's clothesneeded.- Walker Basement at 5:00pan. Come and give us yourclothes.

Wednesday, May 11Traitors' Day--Holiday.

Cesspool(Continued from Page 6)

to obtain a license to dig a shaft,a rule which the Department vio-lated during the first two days ofrescue work, the workers have beenproceeding without delay for thepast two days, and late this after-noon, the forty-foot mark wasreached. According to Flush, nowforeman of the project, "I plan toget my men up bright and early inthe morning and dig a connectingshaft and see if we can't get thedamn fool out.'"

Mrs. Smell sobbingly announcedthat, "I hope he wipes his feet be-fore coming into the house."

AT LAST09SCIENCE GIVES 1NKIND THE ULTIMATE

WONDER-DRUG !Are you bothered by aches and pains?Are you tired, rundown, becoming inefficient, becolistless, lifeless, useless?

END ALL YOUR ORRIES Say "Good-by" to a tired world. Say "Hello" to a new future.

WTIT ONE PILL END EVERYTIING! ! WYT ONE POLL GET REAL, LAS&TING -RELEMf

No half way measures, get it today! -

Caution: Use only as directed, not habit forming.Made by River Styx Manufacturin Company.

.l-rl -- *P--·udsT

_ 1~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I

P Tops- WTI

I PERSONALS - I

George Bernard Shaw once aad,'"arriage is popular because itcombines the maximum of tempta-tion with the maximum of oppor-tunimt.2 -- - -U9IR c~ an~~r~ll~a~asii~L~ tean~r~e8~ori~I II

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Dear JohnPlease come back to me. I am

ready to forgive you and we are outof beer.

Need Money for XmasI am willing to buy one Guten-

buarg bible or Shakespeare folio forfive dollars or best offer.

F 3845Best Buy of Year

For sale: One 1927 Ford Coupe.Excellent condition. Best offer.

U 235

The First Church ofChris4 Scientist

Falmouth, Norway and St. Paul fEBoston, Massschusetts

Suraiday Servc" 10:45 a.m. wad Ttp.M.; Sunday School 10:45 a.m.; WaLday evenlng meetings at 7:oO, whlicclude testimonies of Christian 8,1hea~lng.

Reading Roomse-to the Public. 8 qt.; 237 HuontatAve.; 84 BcStreet, Ittle iStreet Floor. Auttred and appliterature on CW.tian Science manread or obtaLJu- :

CO.MWn lnd 6650

UNIVERSITY SITATIONERYOffice and

School SuppliesSU nassaehusetts Awe,

CncbrIdge, Mssa,4 Braetle St. T'owbridge G-7&95

'O~~E~o rT

A WARNER BoK

RedPlottoShipTop ScientistsBared At Tech

Steamers im Harbor Set to Carry Key MenaTo Soviet Union

From re'uiabe sources, the DafBBeamer has discovered that waitingin Boston EHarbor is a steamer readyto transport about thirty M-.T.scientists to Soviet Russia. We be-Ueve that this astounding develop-ment is the climax of long years ofCommunkstic intrlgue and esplon-age. '

Early thls morning, a Reamer re-porter visited the Institute in theguise of a janitor. In HuntingtonHall, a Physics Lecture room byday, he found remnants of a Com-~nunist meeting that had transpiredbut a few hours earlier. The floorwas littered with cigarette buttsand hammer-ad-sieckle armbands.A flick of an ominous-looking cir-eult switch turned on a slide pro-jector located in the rear of theroom. A slide picture of JosephStalin was still in'the projector. Acrumpled cablegram in a nearbywastebasket and signed "Headquar-ters, the Kremlin" gave clue to thewaiting ship.

In another part of the Institutebuildings, the reporter found thefamous Synchrotron crated andready for shipment. The Synchro-tron, for the information of ourloyal readers, is the machine thatproduces the molecular subst;ancecausing the mushroom cloud of anatom bomb explosion. Further in-vestigation revealed that similaraparatus such as the cyclotron, theCybernation and the Sexatron hadall been crated in like manner.

Only f te SUIMAYBuy~a the Iolowng/ea

No book review fion at

Braffe eailto for &te ]bt~L

BRecorded efiifion for he deal

WHAT CA YOU L6OSE9P ONLY 15 CFNTsSr

R A ~~~~~~~-- ----

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"For me therf

cigarette thatf'

and that's CH

GW" z

The

PfSSes FyMEsEs

Professional Typists

aceaommodations are - tech.mit.edutech.mit.edu/v69/pdf/v69-n26.pdf · guessed that my sex was...

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