119. santa letters

By Vince CiottiH.I.S. (not very) Professionals, LLC

At the risk of antagonizing the many HIS vendor CEOs who have been so helpful in writing my HIS-tory series of their firms over the past year, this week features another special episode for the Christmas season.

To make this holiday a little merrier (and with a little inside help from the NSA), we managed to get copies of the leading HIS vendor executives’ private letters to Santa.

So sit back in your office chair, warm up your egg nog (or that stale office coffee), and enjoy these somewhat “punny” missives meant to poke a little fun at the bosses of our top 13 HIS vendors, listed by order of revenue. Hope Yule like it!

(PS - our attorney can be reached at: 800/555-1212)

Dear Santa,

To make this season a

Paragon of Christmases, I would like

to see a whole Series of Stars spread

across the Horizon.

Sincerely,

John Hammergren

Dear Mr. Claus,

To make my day this Xmas, I’d

like another epic sale the size of

IHC...

Yours truly,

Neal Patterson

Dear Santa,

For this Christmas, I’d sure

be interested my old job back at

Partners, in case you run across

anybody there in your travels...

Sincerely,

John Glaser

Dear Santa,

This Christmas, I really don’t

need anything... but thanks for

asking!

Yours truly,

Judy

Santa,

Since we are based in

Chicago, the biggest help you could

be is to get those Bulls to start

beating the Bears! (on Wall Street,

that is…)

Sincerely,

Paul Black

Dear Mr. Claus,

Could you please help us find

a buyer for our BDM Pharmacy

Division? (…what? Oh…)

Sorry, never mind.

Sincerely,

Jan DeWitt

Santa,

This year, I’d like a Magic wand

so all of our Clients can be Served

on a single Release (6).

Yours,

Neal Pappalardo

Dear Santa,

All I want for Christmas is that our

next Opus encompasses the whole

Sphere of our ambulatory systems.

Sincerely yours,

Steve Plochoki

Santer,

All we’d really like this yeah is to

sell our system to just one really big

hospital for a change – say, one

that’s over 100 beds. Oh awright,

howabout one over 25 beds?

Y’all have a merry one!

Boyd Douglas

Dear Santa,

We’d really appreciate it if you

could make that other “HMS” in New

York change their initials.

Many thanks,

Tom Stevenson

親愛なるサンタ、

あなたは、米国の前に、今年東京で停止を確認してください、

ありがとうございました

Dear Mr. Claus,

Can you please find us some nice office

space in Reston, Virginia, that is located on a

street that is named something besides

“Sunset?” You see, we really have this Affinity

for making Quantim leaps forward…

Many thanks,

Jeff Bender

Dear Santa,

As you may know, I just moved here from

McKesson down in Atlanta. The people up here

in Minnesota are wonderful but the weather is

just dreadful. Could you possibly back off the

snow for few weeks this summer?

Many thanks,

Chris Bauleke

Dear Santa,

Please have Vince stop sending me any more of

these silly episodes next year – they are costing me too

many sponsors. In return, I promise I will start being a

very good boy.

Fondest regards to you and Mrs. Claus,

Yours truly,

Mr. HIStalk