5.24.16 effectively responding to calls from parents in...
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5/18/2016
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Workshop Objectives
Participants will gain an awareness of...• the role of CADRE as the national center and our
resources
and …• learn about strategies to more effectively respond to
parents in crisis and manage difficult calls
and more importantly …• Examine own responses/strategies • Identify self-improvement goals and supports for
meeting those goals
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Assumptions
• Conflict is a healthy reflection of a diverse and changing
society.
• Many parents are in crisis by the time they contact parent
centers.
• Skills can be acquired and strategies implemented that
facilitate productive interactions.
• Workshop participants are already skilled at communicating
and managing difficult calls.
• Even skilled and experienced parent center staff may have an
emotional reaction during a call and may struggle with how
best to respond to the parent.
• Learning how to respond more effectively to parents in crisis
and manage difficult calls is an ongoing process. 3
What makes a
call difficult?
Why are callers
being difficult?
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How do you know
when a call was
managed well?
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What strategies have
you found to be
effective in responding
to parents in crisis and
managing difficult
calls?
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Self Reflection:
What strengths do you have that enable you
to effectively respond to people in crisis and
manage calls well?
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Strategy 1: Understand History, Context, and
Motivation
HistoryDo you have history with this person?
ContextWhat happened prior to the caller actually speaking to you?
MotivationWhat interest/need does the caller have?
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Strategy 2: Show Personal Regard
• When people can empathize with a person, they
are more likely to be compassionate and patient
with a person who is upset or angry.
• Showing a person respect, even when the other
person is not being respectful, can de-escalate a
situation and provide dignity to the individual.
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Empathy
• Frustration/anger can come from an isolated instance
but in many cases comes from multiple experiences.
• Frustration/anger could be the motivation that enabled
the individual to reach out to you.
• Many parents of students with disabilities experience
elevated levels of stress on a regular basis.
• Parents may be overwhelmed and not have the
necessary coping skills to handle their emotions.
• Parents often are afraid of what they think will happen
if their problems are not resolved satisfactorily.
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Differences
On any given day, you may speak with parents who have different expectations, emotional states, manners of communicating, and
abilities. These same parents also come from a variety of cultures and socio-economic
backgrounds.
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Differences
Parents may…
…view gender roles differently.
…view generational roles differently.
…defer to authority differently.
…experience ‘disability’ differently.
…experience and address conflict differently.
…communicate and process information differently.
…assimilate into the dominant culture differently.
…find the IEP process to be inaccessible or unattractive.
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• Our own experiences and
biases impact how we
respond to others.
• This can help us
empathize and be
compassionate with
parents but it can also
interfere with our ability
to best serve them.
How do you balance empathy and compassion with objectivity and self preservation?
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An angry parent needs to vent and will eventually calm down
on their own unless further triggered by what you say.
Strategy 3: Let Them Vent
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Strategy 4: Acknowledge Emotion and the
Difficult Situation They are Experiencing
“You’re experiencing a very difficult situation and are angry
with the school’s response to your concerns.”
“This must be really upsetting for you.”
“It sounds like you are really frustrated with the outcome of
your son’s last IEP meeting?”
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Strategy 5: Listen to Understand
• Listen to entire story and take
notes; Look for main topics,
interests/needs, and feelings
• Resist interrupting them,
jumping to conclusions, or
immediately offering a solution
• Ask clarifying questions as
needed
• Repeat parent’s concern and
what he/she would like help
with
Then, clarify your role and what the caller can expect in regards
to services you and your organization can provide.
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Strategy 6: Role Model and Facilitate Positive
Interactions
Self Reflection:
1. What behaviors trigger an emotional response from
you?
2. How do you respond when a behavior angers or upsets
you?
How can we support each other in modeling and
facilitating positive interactions?
Certain Responses…
• Derail the conversation
• Take the focus off the other person
• Block the other person from finding a solution
• Distance you from the other person
• Diminish the other person’s motivation and
sense of being valued
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High Risk Responses
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• Ordering• Threatening• Moralizing• Advice• Logical Argument• Questions
• Judging• Praising• Name-Calling• Diagnosing• Reassuring• Diverting
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Strategy 7: Restore Power and Control
• Provide accurate information
• Share resources
• Offer choices
• Carefully choose words that empower • “You may already be aware of this resource, but if not, it does a
nice job of explaining…”
• “You may want to consider the following options… ”
• “What do you think about…”
• “How can we support you with…”
• Recommend Capacity Building Opportunities as needed
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Fishbowl Activity
2 people at each table volunteer to act out a situation. The two volunteers sit back to back.
One person acts as the escalator (parent), other person acts as a de-escalator.
Table observes the interaction and provides feedback.
Self-Care
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Reflection
What strengths do you have that enable you to
effectively respond to people in crisis and manage calls
well?
What skills do you need to further develop?
What steps will you take to develop that skill?
Who will support your development of that skill?
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Some CADRE Priorities
• Assist states to implement dispute resolution
provisions of IDEA
• Encourage implementation of effective early
dispute resolution processes
• Promote positive partnerships between parents
and educators to improve student outcomes
• Promote problem solving and agreement
reaching skills
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CADRE’s Work with Parent Centers
CADRE has supported the work of Parent Centers
and PTACs by:
• Regularly attending and presenting at Regional
PTAC meetings each year;
• Disseminating dispute resolution resources to
parent centers;
• Posting materials and webinars for parent
centers and families to our website ; and
• Facilitating SEA/LA and Parent Center
Collaborative Workgroups focused on dispute
resolution resource development. 25
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Resources
CADRE- http://www.directionservice.org/cadre/
Archived Webinar: Using Trauma-Sensitive Strategies
to Support Family Engagement and Effective CollaborationPresented by Dr. Elizabeth Meeker
Upcoming Webinar: Constructive Individual and Systemic Approaches to Helping Frequent FilersPresented by Suzanne McDougall and Marshall PeterJune 8, 2016 from 11:30am-12:45pm PT (1:30-2:45pm CT)
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Questions
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Contact Information
Kelly Rauscher
Dispute Resolution Specialist
CADRE, The National Center for Dispute Resolution in
Special Education
Ph: 541-686-5060
www. http://www.directionservice.org/cadre/
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