chapter 8 interpersonal processes & behavior

Chapter 8 Interpersonal Processes &

Behavior

I didn’t say that I didn’t say it. I said that I didn’t say thatI said it. I want to

make that very clear.

Effective Communication

CommunicationCommunication - the evoking of a shared

or common meaning in another personInterpersonal communication -

communication between two or more people in an organization

CommunicationCommunicator - the person originating the

messageReceiver - the person receiving a messagePerceptual screen - a window through

which we interact with people that influences the quality, accuracy, and clarity of the communication

Basic Interpersonal Communication Model

Event XMessage• Context• Affect

Perceptual screens

Message - the thoughts and feelings that the communicator is attempting to elicit in the receiver

Feedback loop - the pathway that completes two-way communication

CommunicationLanguage - the words, their pronunciation,

and the methods of combining them used & understood by a group of people

Data - uninterpreted and unanalyzed factsInformation - data that have been interpreted,

analyzed, & and have meaning to some userRichness - the ability of a medium or channel

to elicit or evoke meaning in the receiver

The Communication Process

Many people today use a vocabulary of “filler words” that contribute to imprecise language. The following words and phrases distort communication because they’re confusing and ambiguous to listeners:

Like you know See So OKLike oh my God I mean BasicallyAnd all that And everything like thatAnd whatever ‘n’ stuff

Words That Create Distortions

Three Network Types

= Centralized decision maker

= Places where actions are taken and information is generated

Independent,decentralizeddecision makers(cowboys)

Centralizeddecision makers(commanders)

Connected,decentralizeddecision makers(cyber-cowboys)

Source: T.W. Malone, “Is Empowerment Just a Fad? Control, Decision Making and IT,” Sloan Management Review, Winter 1997, pp. 23-35.

Communication Networks

Chain Wheel

All-Channel

Three Common Small-Group Networks

Channelrichness

Type ofmessage

Informationmedium

Leanest

Richest Nonroutine,ambiguous

Routine,clear

Face to facetalk

Telephone

Computer

Memos’letters

Flyers, bulletinsgeneral reports

Hierarchy of Channel Richness

Coping With RumorsAnnounce timetables for making important decisions.Explain decisions and behaviors that may appear inconsistent or secretive.Emphasize the downside, as well as the upside, of current decisions and future plans.Openly discuss worst case possibilities -it is almost never as anxiety provoking as the unspoken fantasy.

Implications for ManagersLess uncertainty, the greater the satisfactionLess distortion in communication equals:Incongruities between verbal and nonverbal communiqués increase uncertainty and reduce satisfaction.The goal of perfect communication is unattainable.The issue of communication is critical to motivation.

ACTIVE LISTENING

“You can not truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time.”

M. Scott Peck

Reflective ListeningReflective Listening - the skill of

listening carefully to another person and repeating back to the speaker the heard message to correct any inaccuracies or misunderstandings

This complex process needs to be divided to be understood

What I heard you say was we will understand the

process better if we break it into steps

Response

ADVICE To make a judgment on the goodness-badness or rightness/wrongness To tell the sharer what he should do

Sets one person above the otherSays, “I know your situation better than you do.”May put sharer on defensiveMoves focus from sharer to listener

INTERPRETATION To teachTo tell what the problem meansTo explain the cause of the problem

Gives informationIntellectualizes the conversation (Moves it away from feelings)Closes off further sharingMoves focus from sharer to listener

SUPPORT To reassureTo minimize the feeling

Makes person feel less aloneSometimes give “you just don’t understand my problem” feelingMinimizes feelingsShifts focus from feelings of sharer to feelings of listener

PROBING To seek further information (a question)To tell the sharer what to talk about

Gets informationLimits areas about which sharer can talkMoves focus from what sharer wants to say to what listener wants to hear

PARAPHRASE To check whether the responder understands the messageTo clarify the problem

Encourages the sharer to go on and explore his feelings and ideas furtherCommunicates acceptance and concern to sharer 

Levels of Empathy 

Level One The responder pays no attention to the content or feelings of the speaker. She ignores, argues with, denies, evaluates, or judges both the content and the feeling expressed.

Level Two The responder pays attention to the content of the message, but not the feelings of the sharer. He ignores, denies or evaluates the feelings.

Level Three The responder pays attention to both the feelings and the content of the sharer’s communication. She, however, ‘hears’ only the verbal and surface level of the communication.

Level Four The listener adds noticeably to the sharer’s expression, hearing feelings even deeper than those the speaker was expressing. The response reflects concern, which encourages the sharer to go on. The listener responds with accuracy to all feelings, communicating a full awareness of the sharer as a person.

Reflective Listening

Helps the receiver & communicator clearly & fully understand the message sent

Useful in problem solving

Reflective ListeningReflective listening emphasizes

the personal elements of the communication processthe feelings communicated in the messageresponding to the communicator, not leading the communicatorthe role or receiver or audienceunderstanding people by reducing perceptual distortions and interpersonal barriers

Reflective Listening: 4 Levels of Verbal

ResponseAffirm contactAffirm contact

Paraphrase the expressedParaphrase the expressed

Clarify the implicitClarify the implicit

Reflect “core” feelingsReflect “core” feelings

Effective ListeningMake eye contact.Exhibit affirmative head nods and appropriate facial expressions.Avoid distracting actions or gestures.Ask questions.Paraphrase.Avoid interrupting the speaker.Don’t over talk.Make smooth transitions between the roles of speaker and listener.

Effective ListeningFind an area of interest.Judge content and not delivery.Hold your fire.Listen for ideas.Be flexible.Resist distractions.Keep your mind open.Work at listening.

Steps To Effective Listening

AttendingFollowingReflecting

Responding

One-way Vs. Two-way Communications

One-way communication - communication in which a person sends a message to another person and no questions, feedback, or interaction follow

good for giving simple directionsFast but often less accurate than 2-way communication

Two-way communication - a form of communication in which the communicator & receiver interact

good for problem solving

Five Keys to Effective Supervisory

CommunicationExpressive speakingEmpathetic listeningPersuasive leadershipSensitivity to feelingsInformative management

Barriers to Effective Communication

FilteringSelective PerceptionDefensivenessLanguage

Barriers to Communication

Physical separationStatus differencesStatus differencesGender differencesCultural diversityLanguage

Communication Communication Barriers - Barriers - factors that block or significantly distort successful communication

Message Influences

Factors thatinfluencesent & receivedmessages

Age

Gender

Culture

Defensive CommunicationDefensive Communication - communication

that can be aggressive, attacking & angry, or passive & withdrawing

Leads toinjured feelingscommunication breakdownsalienationretaliatory behaviorsnonproductive effortsproblem solving failures

Defensive CommunicationDefensive Behaviors1 Evaluation2 Control3 Strategy4 Neutrality5 Superiority6 Certainty

Supportive Behaviors1 Description2 Problem Orientation3 Spontaneity4 Empathy5 Equality6 Provisionalism

Nondefensive Communication

Nondefensive communication - communication that is assertive, direct, & powerful

Providesbasis for defense when attackedrestores order, balance & effectiveness You are feeling

really angry right now.

Two Defensiveness Patterns

Subordinate Defensiveness - characterized by passive, submissive, withdrawing behavior

Dominant Defensiveness - characterized by active, aggressive, attacking behavior

Defensive Tactics

Boss

Employee

Nondefensive Communication: A Powerful Tool

Speaker exhibits self-control & self possessionListener feels accepted rather than rejectedCharacterized by

assertivenesscontrolinformative approachcenteredrealismhonesty

Po

we

r

Nonverbal CommunicationNonverbal communication - all elements of

communication that do not involve wordsFour basic types

Proxemics - an individual’s perception & use of spaceKinesics - study of body movements, including postureFacial & eye behavior - movements that add cues for the receiverParalanguage - variations in speech, such as pitch, loudness, tempo, tone, duration, laughing, & crying

Proxemics: Territorial Space

Territorial space - bands of space extending outward from the body; territorial space differs from culture to culture

ab

cd

a = intimate <1.5’

b = personal 1.5-4’

c = social 4-12’

d = public >12’

Proxemics: Seating Dynamics

Seating dynamics - seating people in certain positions according to the person’s purpose in communication

Cooperation

X O

Non-Communication

O X OCompetition

X

O

Communication

XO

Decoding Non-verbal Cues

Boss fails to acknowledge employee’s greeting

He’s unapproachable!

Manager sighs deeply

He’s angry! I’llstay out of his way!

No eye contact while

communicating

I wonder whathe’s hiding?

My opinion doesn’t count

Boss breathes heavily & waves

arms

Gender and Communication

Does gender really make a difference?Differences:

PurposeLevel of InvolvementStyle

Childhood -- Growing up in Different Worlds.

MenEmphasize SportsMilitary MetaphorsGames – rules, boastful winners

WomenGirls Speak SoonerSmall Groups – same sex groupsIntimacy is KeyEmphasis on getting along

Gender Specific BehaviorsMen

PositionProblem SolvingInterruptionsHierarchyIndependenceTalk to Report

WomenPersonalProcessPermissionDisclaimersUpspeakSolidarityTalk to establish Rapport

Cultural Context Effects

Cross-cultural Communication I

There are barriers caused by semantics.There are barriers caused by word connotations.There are barriers caused by tonal differences.There are barriers caused by differences among perceptions.

Cross-cultural Communications IIAssume differences until similarity is proven.Emphasize description rather than interpretation or evaluation.Practice empathy.Treat your interpretations as a working hypothesis.

Verbal Behavior.Clear, slow speech.Repetition.Simple sentences..Active verbs.

Nonverbal Behavior.Visual restatements.Gestures.Demonstrations.Pauses.Summaries..

What Do I Do If They Don’t Speak My Language?

What You Hear, May Not Be What You See.

The FutureWorkplace DiversityGenerational Issues – technology, loyalty, motivation, styles of communication

BoomersBusters

Changing Role ModelsElectronic Communication

Computer-mediated Communication

Informational databasesElectronic mail systemsVoice mail systemsFax machine systemsCellular phone systems

How Does CMC Affect Communication?

Fast, immediate access to informationImmediate access to people in powerInstant information exchange across distanceMakes schedules & office hours irrelevantMay equalize group power May equalize group participation

How Does CMC Affect Communication?

Communication can become more impersonal--interaction with a machineInterpersonal skills may diminish--less tact, less graciousnessNon-verbal cues lackingAlters social contextEasy to become overwhelmed with informationEncourages polyphasic activity

Tips for Effective Use of CMC

Strive for message

completeness

Build infeedback

opportunities

Don’t assume

immediateresponse

Is themessage

reallynecessary?

Regularlydisconnect

from thetechnology

Providesocial

interactionopportunities