communication rules and mistakes

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Communication rules and mistakes

2nd PRESENTATION OF SOFT SKILLS

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Topics

communication in top10 IBM competencies

communication ways& forms

communication figures & barriers

verbal& non-verbal communication

external system of communication

communication rules V+NV

examples (typology…) and conclusion

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Communication is core of 10 IBMs competencies

Client Partnering– relations with clients based on trustCollaborative influence- international integration and cooperation in between employees and clients Embracing challenge-enthusiasms and focus on solution of key problems in difficult situations Thinking horizontally- creative thinking focused on filling client needs from beginning to endInformed judgment- intuition and expertise focused on correct timing Strategic risk taking- observation of environment for potential growth and filling of OPP Earning Trust- trust in between of IBM employees and clients based on respect, integration and appreciation of everyone's exceptionality Enabling performance and growth- clearing of barriers, what defends to bring value for clients to achieve business growth Developing IBMs people and communities- time & effort to developing individuals, teams and IBM communities to filling client needs Passion for IBM future- IBM capacities and attitudes for clients and deep faith in quality of services

© 2009 IBM Corporation

What is communication?

is a process of transferring information from one person to another

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Communication cycle

Spoken

Heard

Understood

Agreed to

Acted on

Implemented

Hearing

Listening

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One way COMM

Two ways COMM

Communication ways

F2F

+ time saving, possibility of big count of participators, communication without break

- Low trust, feedback missing, low exactness

+ immediately feedback, exactness and deepness, perception of trust and participation

- time seriousness , limitation, low count of participators

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Communication forms

FORMS:

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Communication figures & barriers

Figures: writing language, speaking dialogue, speaking in small or big groups of people, speaking to yourself

Barriers: language, accent, loud voice, disturbing, words have different meaning, evaluation no by content but by person who giving information, listener is disturbed by voices of surroundings, have bad feelings

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Verbal & Non-verbal Communication

VERBAL COMMUNICATION

information transition through speech BLA BLA BLA....

NON-VERBAL COMMUNICATION

connection with feelings ALB ALB ALB…..

Mimic

Postures& proximal zones

Gesticulation

haptics

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Mimic

We communicate through mimic…….

pleasures (eyes raising, smile...)

sadness (lips, cheeks , bird, eyes...)

anger (bird, forehead, eyebrows...)

un-interest or depressions (stone face, absence of face muscles and movements)

Appearing of jokes (grimases, smile...)

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Postures

Attitude of body & body movements

By means what people feel to others, if there is pressure, depression, insecure

Attitude of body influences also everybody's custom

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Proximal zones

public**5M<

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Gesticulation

Adapters --- movements with needn't feelings

Illustrators---- “ so big fish”…

Regulators---- “ you can see chart here and points”

Symbols------ thumb raising, head shaking

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Haptics

direct contact makes sense for people

In our culture: less often,

contact is allowed only for partners or families

Demonstrations:

contact, caress, hug, kiss, hand shaking, beating

We communicate by contact

trust, acceptation, sympathy, encouragement, affection, love and aggressiveness, anger, rejection

© 2009 IBM Corporation

External system of communication

Biophysical and psychological factors: image, gender, age, race, psychosomatic and physical state (Image= appearance, cloth, position in group, stereotypes)

Socio- educative signs: education, social status, employment

Cultural models: religion, ethics, morality, esthetics

Environmental factors

© 2009 IBM Corporation

communication rules VC

Communicate about concrete statements (no general ones)

Explain meaning of key words exactly

Speak in first person (I, me…)

Think whether is listener prepared on content of communication what you want to tell him (he has to be focused well)

© 2009 IBM Corporation

communication rules NVC

be easy in face showing

limit rushing postures

keep eyes contact

smiling at partner

take off any pressure

don’t use so much gesticulation

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WHAT SURVEYS FOUND???

What matters in communication mostly?

Body language55%

Tone of voice38%

Content of words7%

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Examples- Typology PARENT ADULT CHILD

Words

▪ always ▪ never ▪ don’t do that this way ▪ don’t do that ▪ must ▪ should/ could ▪ never forget ▪ what think others? ▪ you are wrong ▪ explain me it ▪ listen now ▪ let me help you ▪ in our family we do that this way

▪ I believe ▪ who? ▪ what? ▪ When? ▪ Where? ▪ How? ▪ often ▪ tell me more ▪ what do you think ▪ we find out ▪ here are facts ▪ my point is ▪ experiences tells ▪ reasons for why

▪ I feel ▪ terrible ▪ help me ▪ fantastic ▪ I want this ▪ I cant ▪ super ▪ cool ▪ fooling ▪ exciting ▪ primitive ▪ Im full up this

VOICE

▪ critical ▪ bossing ▪ supporting ▪ authoritative ▪ secure

▪ clear ▪ relaxed ▪ factual ▪ harmonic ▪ without emotions

▪ crying ▪ playing ▪ happy ▪ yelling ▪ excited ▪ emotional ▪ submissive

GESTICULATION

▪ pointing finger ▪ disagreement view ▪ croosing hands ▪ shaking with head ▪ above glasses

▪ eye contact ▪ relaxed ▪ wanted eye contact ▪ deep thinking ▪ open palms

▪ laugh ▪ cry ▪ wide eyes opening ▪ dancing

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Strategic Compromise You: "We should go out to eat tonight."

Opponent: "But we ate out last night, and we need to save our money."

You: "I don't care. We should go out to eat tonight, and then we'll treat ourselves and all of our neighbors to a Broadway play."

Opponent: "But that would cost a fortune!"

You: "Yeah, I suppose you're right. Gosh, that would run hundreds of dollars, wouldn't it?"

Opponent: "Yes, it would."

You: "Ok, just dinner it is, then."

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Forgetfulness You: "Virginia has never produced any good presidents."

Opponent: "Yes it has. Actually, most of our better presidents came from Virginia."

You: "But that's exactly what I'm saying...I think...I dunno...I forgot."

Opponent: "So we agree?"

You: "Yup. I'm right."

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Lies You: "Dogs are better than cats."

Opponent: "I prefer cats."

You: "But cats eat babies! They dig their rabid muzzles into infants' chests and rip their kidneys out!"

Opponent: "No they don't!"

You: "They do! And they killed my great grandmother! Twice!"

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Rhymes You: "There are no people on this planet that do not believe in democracy."

Opponent: "Yes there are. They're called communists."

You: "Communists schmommunists!"

Opponent: "..."

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Rhymes You: "There are no people on this planet that do not believe in democracy."

Opponent: "Yes there are. They're called communists."

You: "Communists schmommunists!"

Opponent: "..."

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Random comments You: "School lunches suck."

Opponent: "Despite the taste, school lunches are, in actuality, very nutritional."

You: "On the contrary! Mahogany is one of Honduras' primary lumber exports."

Opponent: "Mahogany? Honduras? This has nothing to do with school lunches!"

You: "Yeah, well, I could beat you at arm wrestling!"

Opponent: "What does-- But-- You--"

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Clearly Opponent: "I don't see how you can say clothing is immoral."

You: "Clothing was invented as a means of concealing immorality. Anyone wearing clothing is clearly doing so for the same reason."

Opponent: "No, people wear clothing for a number of reasons. To stay warm, for example."

You: "Clearly, these reasons are rationalizations made up after the fact."

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Name calling You: "I believe all short people should be beaten with rocks until they bleed."

Opponent: "I think that's a very horrible and malicious idea."

You: "Well, you're fat! Fatty fat doo doo head!"

Opponent: (sobs)

© 2009 IBM Corporation

Sourceshttp://www.rinkworks.com/persuasive/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Communication

http://learning.atlanta.ibm.com/manager/quickview/mgrqv.nsf/Content/85256886:005E552A

http://www.infovek.sk/predmety/etika/namety/komunikacia/komunikacia.php#ciele

Krpalkova,K. a kol.: Rozvoj podnikateľských zručností.STU, Trnava, 2009, ISBN 978-80-227-3164-5

Psychológia osobnosti a sociálna psychológia, Socialna psychológia II. VŠSA, Košice.2009.