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Southside Security Improvements New security measures will be
installed in Southside following
a campaign by Ian Howgate, a
concerned student.
T h e Students Res idence
Commi t t ee , the C o l l e g e
Commi t tee that con t ro ls
res idences , has dec ided that
secur i ty lodges wil l be built at
the East and West en t rances to
Sou ths ide . O n e ent rance wil l be
manned by a messenger dur ing
the day and both wil l be manned
after 10pm. Magne t i c l ocks will
be in t roduced and lockab le post
boxes will be instal led.
T iza rd Hal l Commi t tee have
asked Dr Henry Hu t ch inson ,
warden of T izard Ha l l , to
r ec om m en d to the Ch ie f
Secur i ty Off icer , that bed room
looks are rep laced and extra
Secur i ty personel emp loyed .
Mr Howgate commen ted 'As
far as I'm conce rned the
p roposa ls are g o o d proposa ls ,
but they must go the who le way'.
He est imates that the cost of
mann ing both doors th roughout
the day wil l be sixtyf ive pence
per week per person in
res idence in P r incess G a r d e n * .
IC Un ion Pres ident Ca r l
Bu rgess told FEL IX that he
Ian Howgate
thought the proposa ls were
g o o d . He sa id though that
secur i ty cou ld be improved if the
guards c h e c k e d the U n i o n C a r d s
of people enter ing Sou ths ide . H e
pointed out that va luab les had
been sto len f rom locked rooms
by peop le who appeared to have
sto len keys. A Un ion card check
wou ld in his view result in these
peop le being caught . He
admit ted that s u c h a check
wou ld be a nu isance to
Wacky Field Cup This year's Field Cup is reported to have been a tremendous
success. A Guilds' spokesman stated that lots of 'very silly' things
were done, in a generally boisterous and high-spirited atmosphere:
'You'd be surprised what people will do to their bodies if they
think they'll.get points for it,' he said.
It was claimed that the best-selling drink of the evening was a
pint of bitter, liberally doused with curry powder, while for two of
the revellers, sharing a 'willy-warmer' was seen to be the right way
to pass the time.
Sou ths ide residents, but sa id
that residents wou ld have to
dec ide whether they wanted
conven ience or secur i ty .
Mr Bu rgess a lso sugges ted
that an alarm shou ld be put on
the ent rance to the tunnels
under Sou ths ide .
T h e Manag ing Surveyor of
Res idences , Peter Ha l lwor th told
F E L I X that the modi f ica t ions
wou ld 'hopeful ly be comple te by
the start of S u m m e r term'.
Apology IC U n i o n Pres ident , Ca r l
Burgess , has apo log ised to
Sou ths ide residents after
d is rupt ing on open meet ing on
secur i ty by turn ing drunk.
The meet ing had been ca l led
by Ian Howgate , a Fa lmouth
K e o g h resident who has*
campa igned about secur i ty in
Sou ths ide , so that residents
cou ld draw up proposa ls for
improv ing secur i ty . Mr Howga te
opened the meet ing by out l in ing
the prob lems.
Mr Bu rgess arr ived late in an
inebr iated state with Ch r i s
Hendy , Fa lmouth K e o g h
subwarden . Mr Hendy then took
the chai r and Mr Bu rgess started
mak ing speeches and prevented
Mr Howgate speak ing .
Eventual ly Mr Howga te lead a
walkout by residents when he
dec ided that d i scuss ion was
imposs ib le .
Mr B u r g e s s wrote a letter to
F E L I X on Monday luncht ime
apo log i s ing for his behav iour
and he a lso apo log ised to U n i o n
Counc i l - f o r br ing ing the U n i o n
into d isrepute.
D
D
3] 2
D
t
D
c s
Free Friday 21 February No 732
E
Sabbaticals
C a r l B u r g e s s was w r o n g to
g o to the S o u t h s i d e
meet ing on S u n d a y drunk.
H e was there as a s tudent
representat ive. H e was
there to c o n v i n c e
S o u t h s i d e res idents that he
was suppo r t i ng thei r efforts
to improve S o u t h s i d e
secur i t y . Un fo r tuna te ly h is
pe r fo rmance d i s i l l us ioned
them.
Hav ing sa id th is , on
M o n d a y m o r n i n g C a r l ,
rea l ised his mis take. H e
knew he c o u l d not res ign
b e c a u s e this late in the
year n o b o d y w o u l d take o n
the respons ib i l i t y of be ing
Pres ident . H e d id the on ly 1
th ing he c o u l d do, w h i c h
was to a p o l o g i s e to
eve ryone c o n c e r n e d .
Hope fu l l y , by d o i n g this he
wi l l rega in peop le 's
c o n f i d e n c e . It is qui te brave
to admi t b lame and C a r l
has d o n e this. I hope he
gets s o m e credi t for d o i n g
s o .
If a n y o n e e lse wants to
be a sabba t i ca l c o m e and
see me as s o o n as poss ib l e
as I have to adv ise y o u
about p r o d u c i n g pub l ic i ty .
Credits
T h a n k s to J Mar t in Tay lo r ,
B i l l G o o d w i n , A n d y Major ,
R i c h a r d S m i t h , J a n e
S p i e g e l , K a m a l a S e n ,
S u n n y Ba ins , Sa rah Ki rk ,
B e n j a m i n , R o s e m a r y
H o s k i n g , J i m C l a y d e n ,
Ma rk Cot t le , C h r i s
E d w a r d s , Dave J o n e s , Dave
Gr i f f i ths , C h r i s S tap le ton ,
N i g e l A t k i n s o n and Pete
W i l s o n .
FELIX is publ ished by the Edi tor for and on behalf of Imperial Co l l ege
Un ion Pub l ica t ions Boa rd and is printed by the Imperial Co l l ege Un ion
Print Unit. Pr ince Conso r t R o a d , London , SW7 2 B B , (Tel 01-589 5111
ext 3515). The Edi tor of FEL IX is Hugh Southey and The Bus iness
Manager is J Mart in Taylor . Copyr igh t FELIX 1986. ISSN 1040-0711.
Star Trek Stiffs
Southside: The
Apologies Dear H u g h ,
M a y I take this oppor tun i t y
to a p o l o g i s e to al l t hose
c o n c e r n e d for a l l ow ing the
Sou ths i de secur i ty meet ing
to co l l apse into a state of
d i sa r ray on S u n d a y
even ing . T h e on ly reason I
of fered to cha i r the meet ing
was I thought it wou ld
make it eas ie r for Ian to put
forward his v iews if not in
the chai r . O n ref lec t ion it
was obv ious l y w r on g to
at tempt to cha i r the
meet ing as I d o U G M ' s . we
all make mis takes!
I w o u l d l ike however to
use this s p a c e to
congra tu la te Ian o n the
hard work he has
under taken in an at tempt to
better Secur i t y in
Sou ths i de . T h e lack of
Secu r i t y in S o u t h s i d e has
been of c o n c e r n to me
du r i ng my three years as
S u b w a r d e n of F a l m o u t h -
K e o g h Hal l and I can
assu re all res idents that
'any moves to improve the
s i tuat ion have my ful l
b a c k i n g .
•'Yours apologetically
\Chris Hendy
;|TO W H O M IT M A Y
; C O N C E R N
|On S u n d a y , 16th February ,
I a t tended a meet ing with
var ious S o u t h s i d e res idents
c o n c e r n i n g the secur i t y in
Sou ths ide . T h e meet ing
was at 9 .00pm a n d I regret
to say I tu rned up more
than somewha t inebr ia ted .
Hav ing been reminded of
the meet ing ear l ier du r i ng
the day, after I had star ted
d r i nk ing , I s h o u l d then
have taken the d e c i s i o n not
to at tend the meet ing .
Un fo r tuna te ly I d id not take
that d e c i s i o n and s o made
a m i s t a k e *
I have been in fo rmed that
many peop le were upset
over my c o n d u c t at the
meet ing , and so I s h o u l d
l ike to take this oppor tun i t y
to a p o l o g i s e to t hem. I
shou ld a lso l ike to exp la in
that the secur i ty s i tuat ion
in S o u t h s i d e has been ful ly
invest igated and p lans are
under way to inc rease the
secur i ty there.
The re have been many
p rob lems in the past a n d
we have tr ied th is t ime to
c o m e up with a v iab le
so lu t ion . If a n y o n e wou ld
l ike to c o m e and see me to
d i s c u s s this or any other
matter p lease feel f ree to
do so .
Carl Burgess
President
17 February 1986
Dear Mr Sou they ,
I speak for a large numbe r
of IC s tudents when I say
that, f rank ly , we' re get t ing
bored stiff by s o m e of the
mater ia l w h i c h has been
appea r i ng in the F E L I X
' letters' pages recent ly .
S o m e F E L I X H a c k s think
they ' re be ing amaz ing l y
funny by s l agg ing off o ther
peop le wi thout hav ing the
guts to s ign their n a m e s at
the bo t tom, prefer r ing to
use s o m e p s e u d o - c o m i c a l .
'Star Trek ' n a m e s ins tead.
J a m e s E Kirk (Cap ta in
K i rk?) w h o wou ldn ' t wear a
tie to a ' C r a z y T ie ' party,
s e e m s to me the sort of
pe rson w h o wou ld go to a
1920's party in a pink toga
and to a v icars and tarts
party wear ing mo to r - cyc l e
leathers. T h e ga rbage that
' S p o c k ' and ' J a m e s E Kirk '
have been wr i t ing is the
sort of dr ivel most IC
s tudents sneer at wi th utter
con tempt , so I'm sure we' l l
al l heave a s igh of relief
w h e n we s top see ing it.
Yours sincerely,
Alastair Seymour
Elec Eng 1
Southside: The
Complaints
Dear S i r ,
W e have just re turned f rom
a meet ing of the
commi t tees of S o u t h s i d e
Hal ls . It was ca l led by Mr
Ian Howga t e of F a l m o u t h -
K e o g h a n d was to c o n c e r n
Secu r i t y in S o u t h s i d e , a
p rob lem of great
impor tance to those w h o
live here.
It is the fee l ing of the
unde rs igned that the
pe r fo rmance of the U n i o n
representat ive present
s h o u l d be b rough t to the
at tent ion of the s tudents of
Imperial .
T h e meet ing p r o c e e d e d
wi th speed and e f f i c iency
under the c h a i r m a n s h i p of
Mr Howga te , unt i l M r
B u r g e s s and M r H e n d y
arr ived late and under the
in f l uence of a l c o h o l . T h e
best that c o u l d be sa id of
Mr B u r g e s s was that he
c o u l d sti l l walk.
There to al l intents and
pu rposes the meet ing
s t opped , as these two
gen t lemen took con t ro l ,
ous t ing Mr Howga te f rom
the cha i r .
M r B u r g e s s gave us a
long sp ie l on his v i r tues as
a representat ive of IC
s tudents , con ta i n i n g what
must by the quo te of the
century ' . , no one ever
no t ices what I do ' .
Fo l l ow ing this he at tempted
to keep ' b l oody order ' by
prevent ing those with val id
po in ts f rom mak ing them.
Mr H e n d y the new
cha i rman was noted as
s topp ing the meet ing seven
t imes to ask the same
s imp le ques t i on , ' D o e s
a n y o n e present feel
sat is f ied with secur i t y in
S o u t h s i d e ? ' on the last
o c c a s i o n he was answered
wi th a resound ing ' N O ! ' Mr
H o w g a t e left say ing the
meet ing wou ld reconvene
later as he wa l ked out in
d isgus t .
T h e last point f rom the
f loor was ' cou ld the
Pres iden t Please be sober
at the next mee t i ng? ' A
sent iment e c h o e d by many
of the a s s e m b l e d s tudents .
Th i s point may not have
made the minutes as the
meet ing c o u l d be sa id to
have c l o s e d , b e c a u s e we
were all leav ing.
If Mr B u r g e s s wou ld w ish
to truly represent IC
S tuden ts , then perhaps he
s h o u l d arrive on t ime and
in a state in w h i c h he c o u l d
remember the night before,
the morn ing after.
We hope that he, or the
U n i o n , wou ld act on this
observa t ion and think that
not on ly shou ld the un ion
o f f ic ia ls (espec ia l ly the
Pres ident ) represent the
s tudents but shou ld a lso be
representat ive of the
s tudents .
If Mr B u r g e s s feels that
he was in a fit state to
represent the U n i o n at a
meet ing of s tudents , then
pe rhaps both the U n i o n
and the s tudents of
Imperial s h o u l d c o n s i d e r
ra is ing the s tandards of
their P res iden t ' s behav iour ,
or se r ious ly c o n s i d e r
e lec t ing s o m e o n e who 's
Friday 21 February FELIX
Southside: The Complaints... (continued)
s t a n d a r d s ref lect t hose of
the major i ty
Yours sincerely,
Mai Hunter (UG Rep
Tizard)
M Steer (Staircase Rep
Tizard)
GK Whittaker (concerned
student)
Jez Deacon (Staircase Rep)
A Wonnacott (Ass
Subwarden)
Steven Norton (Chairman
Tizzard)
M Mueller (Tizard resident)
This reflects the views of a
large number of Southside
students who weren't
present so can't legtimately
sign this letter
D e a r F E L I X ,
O n S u n d a y e v e n i n g I
a t t ended a mee t i ng of
S o u t h s i d e res iden ts in
F a l m o u t h - K e o g h to d i s c u s s
w i d e s p r e a d c o n c e r n ove r
secu r i t y a r r a n g e m e n t s . T h e
mee t i ng had been c a l l e d by
Ian H o w g a t e , a F a l m o u t h -
K e o g h res ident w h o had
d o n e a su rvey on the extent
of thef ts f r om r o o m s a n d
mai l r acks . T h e ob jec t of
the mee t i ng was to have
been for Ian to p resen t h is
v iew of the p r o b l e m to
in te res ted s tuden t s a n d to
c a n v a s for s u g g e s t i o n s . I
u n d e r s t a n d Ian had
c o n s u l t e d the S o u t h s i d e
w a r d e n s a b o u t the p r o b l e m
a n d that they had a g r e e d
that th is s h o u l d be a
res iden ts c a m p a i g n
i n d e p e n d e n t of the
w a r d e n s , w h o have been
m a k i n g the i r o w n ef for ts o n
the sub jec t for s o m e t i m e .
C a r l B u r g e s s , as
p res iden t of the U n i o n , had
been inv i ted to a t tend to
l is ten to the res iden ts c a s e .
H o w e v e r M r B u r g e s s
ar r ived o b v i o u s l y s o m e w h a t
inebr ia ted a n d p r o c e e d e d
to in ter rupt Ian a n d a n y o n e
e l se w h o s p o k e , to ramb le
i n c o h e r e n t l y a b o u t h o w
c a p a b l e he was a n d to s l a g
off t h o s e e x p r e s s i n g
c o n c e r n . T h e s i tua t ion w a s
m a d e no bet ter by C h r i s
H e n d y , F a l m o u t h - K e o g h
s u b w a r d e n , w h o o f fe red to
h e l p Ian by c h a i r i n g the
mee t i ng . Un f o r t una t e l y M r
B u r g e s s w a s a l l o w e d to
c o n t i n u e m a k i n g a foo l of
h imse l f a n d no a t tempt w a s
real ly m a d e to let Ian put
h is c a s e be fore a
d i s c u s s i o n w a s s ta r ted . T o
be fair the s i tua t ion w a s not
h e l p e d by two o ther p e o p l e
p resen t w h o s e e m e d intent
on c h a l l e n g i n g every t r iv ia l
po in t , but in a shor t p e r i o d
of t ime p e o p l e w h o s h o u l d
k n o w bet ter had c a u s e d an
impor tan t mee t i ng to
d e g e n e r a t e to a f a rce . At
th is po in t Ian led a wa lk out
by mos t of the res iden ts
p resent .
S o u t h s i d e secu r i t y is a
very s e r i o u s i ssue , it is a
p r o b l e m that has been
a l l o w e d to c o n t i n u e far t oo
l o n g . W h e n p e o p l e w h o are
s u p p o s e d to rep resen t us ,
a n d I rea l ly m e a n C a r l
B u r g e s s , b e h a v e l ike tota l
wa l l y ' s ove r mat ters w h i c h
were o b v i o u s l y of c o n c e r n
to a la rge n u m b e r of p e o p l e
it is t ime to wor ry . M r
B u r g e s s was intent on
ins i s t i ng that the mat ter be
left to h im but how, c a n we
f rank ly be e x p e c t e d to t rust
in C a r l w h e n he is to ta l ly
i n c a p a b l e of s h o w i n g
o rd i na r y s t uden t s that he is
t rus twor thy . S o m e may say
that it is too late in the yea r
to th ink abou t vo tes of no
c o n f i d e n c e , but the
s i t ua t i on c a n n o t be a l l o w e d
to c o n t i n u e w i thou t s o m e
c o m m e n t . It is impor tan t
that p e o p l e w h o get e l e c t e d
s h o u l d not be a l l o w e d to
th ink that they c a n n o t be
he ld r e s p o n s i b l e for the i r
i n c o m p e t e n c e , a n d I fo r
o n e w o u l d s u p p o r t a
m o t i o n c e n s u r i n g C a r l
B u r g e s s for h is s t up id
behav iou r .
Mark Cottle
Falmouth Keogh Resident
D e a r F E L I X ,
T h i s e v e n i n g at F a l m o u t h
K e o g h Ha l l , we a t tended a
m e e t i n g c o n c e r n i n g the
state of secu r i t y in the ha l ls
of r e s i d e n c e .
It is a mat ter of c o m m o n
k n o w l e d g e that at p resen t
s c a r c e l y a d a y p a s s e s
w i thou t s o m e e x a m p l e of
a b y s m a l neg lec t in th is
a rea . D u r i n g recen t w e e k s
res iden ts ' ma i l has been
repea ted l y s to l en , m a c h i n e s
v a n d a l i s e d etc . W e
d i s c o v e r e d today , that o n l y
o n F r i day two r o o m s w i th in
the S o u t h s i d e c o m p l e x
we re en te red , p r o b a b l y w i th
o n e of the my r i ad of mas te r
keys w h i c h are f ree ly
ava i l ab le to al l a n d s u n d r y ,
a n d in o n e of t hese r o o m s
a wal le t a n d £1,000 wor th
of c a m e r a e q u i p m e n t w a s
r e m o v e d . T h i s h a p p e n e d at
1.15pm at w h i c h t ime the
res iden t was tak ing a
s h o w e r on the s a m e
l a n d i n g .
A t the m e e t i n g , the
at t i tude d i s p l a y e d by the
s u b w a r d e n C h r i s H e n d y
w a s s o m e w h a t ak i n to h is
a t tempts to qu ie ten the
n o i s y a n d v a c u o u s at IC
U G M ' s . H e w a s seve re l y
out of t o u c h w i th the n e e d
for a c t i o n rather than the
- • J " "
s o u n d of h is o w n v o i c e au tho r i t i es to ins t iga te a n y ffR
be ing e x e r c i s e d . In add i t i on a c t i o n to i m p r o v e the IPS* to th is , ou r sa la r i ed fac i l i t ies ava i l ab le .
represen ta t i ve , C a r l • S o u t h s i d e e n t r a n c e s are 53
B u r g e s s , w a s o b v o u s l y not s e c u r e . At the Se lk i r k
i n tox i ca ted to a d e g r e e en t rance , the lock bar re l is M*>
w h i c h r e n d e r e d h is at t imes so w o r n as to a c c e p t any f £
use fu l i n te l lec tua l a p p r a i s a l key, a n d a lmos t any I C H VI
at a level s o m e w h e r e c l o s e b lank key wi l l o p e n it. T h e j
to that of a m a n d e c e a s e d . ca rd key s y s t e m is st i l l not
Even tua l l y the ins t iga to r o p e r a t i o n a l , a n d w o r e out
of the m e e t i n g , Ian very fast w h e n it was . It is
H o w g a t e , u n a b l e to put st i l l easy to ga in a c c e s s to
fo rward his o b s e r v a t i o n s on the S o u t h s i d e tunne l level
the mat ter d u e to M r s y s t e m via the lifts a n d v i ce
H e n d y ' s o b s t r u c t i o n i s m , ve rsa . F r o m th is po in t , the
left, f o l l o w e d by a la rge lifts at e a c h e n d of the
n u m b e r of the o ther b u i l d i n g c a n be o v e r i d d e n ,
res iden ts . a n d c a l l e d to the tunne l
It is essen t i a l that leve l . T h e p o s s i b l e
S o u t h s i d e secu r i t y is c o n s e q u e n c e s of th is c a n
i m p r o v e d immed ia te l y , eas i l y be i m a g i n e d ,
b e c a u s e the s i tua t ion h a s S o u t h s i d e secu r i t y are
de te r io ra ted to the po in t of too o v e r w o r k e d to c h e c k
r id i cu le . S o u t h s i d e secu r i t y o n e v e r y o n e en te r ing v ia
work to the best a d v a n t a g e the i r e n t r a n c e ,
p o s s i b l e , but they a re Wi l l it requ i re a n o t h e r
h a m p e r e d by lack of rape or w o r s e , be fo re
m a n p o w e r . T h e faul t rea l ly a c t i o n is t a k e n ?
l ies wi th the fa i lure of the B Morrison
U n i o n a n d C o l l e g e A Banister
Letters to FELIX must arrive in the FELIX Office by 1.30pm
if they are too be printed in Friday's FELIX. All letters must
be signed although names will be witheld if requested.
Letters can be on any subject. The Editor can not
guarantee to print any letter. No ;etter, though, will be
edited without the author's consent.
f f V E c e e !
o 9
U L U Travel , Imperial Col
Sherf ield Bui lding,
Prince Consor t Road ,
London S W 7 .
Tel: 01-581 8882
ege.
svm TheWorldbeaters
FELIX Friday 21 February 3
A Public School
Snob Writes...
Dear S i r ,
Wh i l s t the '3rd year
C o m p u t i n g U n d e r g r a d u a t e '
h a s s o m e in teres t ing
a c e r b i c c o m m e n t s to m a k e
on i nnocen t M S c s tudents ,
I wou ld have t hough t it
better for h im to w i thho ld
h is s c u r r i l o u s ran t ings f rom
the o therw ise relat ively
sane pages of F E L I X . H i s
sort of sn ide , u n d e r h a n d
c o m m e n t s shou ld be
reserved for s u c h gut ter-
press o rgans as ' R C S
Broadshee t ' .
In my o p i n i o n (wh ich is
un for tunate ly b i ased as I
a m f rom pub l i c s c h o o l ) the
'o ld boys ' are the on ly ones
w h o do real ly k n o w h o w
th ings s h o u l d be d o n e .
Con t ra r y to popu la r bel ief
we are not s n o b s o r gay .
W e have manne rs (wh ich
the C o m p u t i n g
unde rg radua tes obv ious l y
l acks ) , most of us are
reasonab le pub l i c s p e a k e r s
(unl ike the U n i o n
execu t i ves ) , mos t of us
have talents in o ther f ie lds
apart f rom j us ' s c i e n c e and
we are p repared to work to
improve ourse lves a n d the
reputa t ion of ou r co l l ege ,
rather than lett ing it be
d r a g g e d d o w n to the level
of the insuf ferab le 3rd year
C o m p u t e r Sc ien t i s t . Let us
have no more of thei r
inverted snobbe ry !
Yours faithfully,
Physics Undergraduate
(Name supplied)
A Great
Guy/Woman
Writes...
Dear S i r ,
T h e obse rva t i on by the 3rd
year C o m p u t i n g
U n d e r g r a d u a t e is
abso lu te l y cor rec t . I a m an
M S c c o m p u t i n g s tudent
mysel f and I have seen
M S c Pos tg radua te s tuden ts
w h o think that they have
the mak ing of a po l i t i c ian
by the s w a g g e r and d i sp lay
they put into their
' ques t ions ' .
For tunate ly , I happen to
fall into the al ternat ive
desc r i p t i on of M S c
s tudents : 'Mos t M S c ' s are
great guys /women . . . ' . A s
s u c h I w o u l d l ike to adv ise
3rd year C o m p u t i n g
Unde rg radua te to be more
c i r c u m s p e c t in h is
ca tego r i s i ng IC s tudent
popu la t i on into 3 d is t inc t
g r o u p s b e c a u s e by a s ing le
e x a m p l e and o n e fel l s t roke
of h is pen , he has
c o n s i g n e d all M S c ' s to
eternal in famy. Af ter a l l , al l
o p i n i o n s are l ike a r s e h o l e s -
eve rybody has one .
Yours sincerely,
MSc Computing Student
Name withheld by request
Moonie Blues
Part 2
Dear H u g h ,
I read M i k e B a l c o m b ' s
letter in last week s F E L I X
wi th s o m e interest, no t ing
in par t i cu la r his ex tens ive
use of o n e s tudy as proof
that h is o rgan i sa t i on
( C A R P ) is not the og re
' M o o n i e B lues ' makes it out
to be.
Hav ing tw ice read Dr
Ba rbe r ' s book ' The M a k i n g
of a M o o n i e ' ( there's no
need to s p e n d £12, as there
is a c o p y in the H a l d a n e
L ibrary) I wou ld l ike to
share a few observa t ions .
Dr Ba rbe r was ' c h o s e n '
by the Un i f i ca t i on C h u r c h
to c o n d u c t her s tudys as
she was un l ike ly to be
b iased aga ins t the c h u r c h
at the start. T h i s is not
meant to sugges t that
f u n d i n g c a m e for w i th in the
Un i f i ca t i on M o v e m e n t
( infact, the S S R C foo ted
m u c h of the bi l l ) , but it
must be borne in m ind that
it was the M o o n i e s w h o
asked E i leen Barbe r to
invest igate thei r
o rgansa t i on . W h i l e s h e was
not a U C member , s h e had
had s o m e con tac t wi th
t hem, and had not
a p p e a r e d to be
unsympa the t i c .
'The mak ing of a M o o n i e '
cove rs qui te ex tens ive ly
rece iv ing t echn iqu e (as
obse rved ) , b u t , qu i te
r ight ly d raws c o n c l u s i o n s
on l y as far as the v o l u m e of
e v i d e n c e permi ts . T h e
e v i d e n c e c a m e part ly f rom
f i rs t -hand e x p e r i e n c e in a
n u m b e r of un i f ica t ion
cen t res and part ly f rom
ques t i ona i res and
in terv iews with past and
present (then) U C
m e m b e r s . N e e d l e s s to say ,
the cur rent m e m b e r s were,
to man , adamen t that they
had not been b r a i n w a s h e d .
S o m e of the ' leavers ' had
di f ferent ideas. M r
B a l c o m b s sugges t i on that
a l lega t ions of b ra inwash ing
have been d i s con t i nue d is,
of c o u r s e , i nde fens ib le
(Wi tness F E L I X , 31 2 86)
If t ime permi t ted, it wou ld
be tempt ing to d i s c u s s the
po l i t i ca l act iv i t ies of the U C
and the mora l i ty of the
un i f i ca t ion c o n c e p t of
'D iv ine Decep t i on ' .
However , in c o n c l u s i o n I
w o u l d rather remind
readers that, wh i le C A R P ,
the Un i f ca t i on c h u r c h , the
Ho l y Spi r i t A s s o c i a t i o n for
Un i f i ca t ion of wor ld
Chr i s t i an i t y , a n d all the
other re lated o rgan i sa t i ons
may, legal ly s p e a k i n g be
qu i te separa te they have in
c o m m o n the po l i c ies ,
p r i nc ip les a n d a i m s of the
Rev S u n M y u n g M o o n .
Yours sincerely,
Alastair Macleod
Let ters are al l very we l l but
how do y o u write to a few
hund red ( thousand) peop le
all at o n c e and in an
e n g a g i n g a n d witty manner
t o o ? I mean , wr i t ing hurts,
it hurts me at least. A n d ,
don ' t on l y m e a n in the
menta l way , I f ind my hand
is l i fe less, my a r m du l l ened
after on ly a few pages of
l o n g h a n d s t rugg le . I can ' t
type, k n o w no sho r thand
and even if I c o u l d pay
s o m e b o d y to d o it al l for
me I p robab l y wou ldn ' t
b e c a u s e I'm a m e a n
bas tard . O r I w o u l d be if I
had any m o n e y to be m e a n
wi th . The re , I've used mean
4, no 5 t imes a l ready . Rest
assu red gent le reader, it
wou ldn ' t happen if I had a
decen t vocabu la ry . Tha t I
p lace the b lame for on my
E n g l i s h t eache rs of
yes te rday . A n d a bit before
that as wel l . G r a m m a r
wasn ' t s p o k e n of, week l y
spe l l i ng tests were in and
very little e lse . A few years
a g o a w o m a n w h o used to
live next d o o r to us
c o m m e n t e d to my mother
o n how w e l l - s p o k e n I n o w
was 'and h im hav ing been
in remedia l Eng l i sh c lass
too! ' I was ou t raged at th is
s lu r on my abi l i ty, I've
never been remedia l in my
life, the cheek of it a l l . N o w
here I a m and I feel
ex t reme ly , we l l , remed ia l . A
gir l at a party last week
i n t r oduced me to
s o m e b o d y as 'the guy who
is qu i te g o o d at tenn is but
shi t at c o m p u t i n g ' . A l i fe's
amb i t i on c r u s h e d in the
hands of a 6 foot a m a z o n
wi th the a c c u r a c y of a
s t r ik ing c o b r a . A n d she
doesn ' t know how bad I a m
at tenn is as we l l . R e c e n t l y
I've been g rapp l i ng wi th a
sense of i n a d e q u a c y not
seen s i n c e Wal te r Mit ty. In
my d reams I a m a
s u c c e s s f u l pe rson .
S u c c e s s f u l in soc ie t y ' s
terms; s o m e t h i n g in my
w a k i n g m o m e n t s I p ro fess
to s h u n . A woo lga the r i n g
woo l y - p r i nc i p l e d
backs l i de r . I can ' t th ink of a
w o r d mean ing back s l ider
that beg ins wi th a 'w'.
W h e n I leave th is al tar of
learn ing , no doub t wi th
some th i ng to s h o w for it, I
sha l l do if not my utmost
then cer ta in ly qu i te a lot to
forget what little, I have
ass im i la ted . A t h e o l o g y
s tudent o n c e remarked to
me on the little known fact
that in h is o p i n i o n
c o m p u t i n g was the most
sense less (and use less)
d e g r e e sub jec t out . H a d I
been qu ick of m ind and
n imb le of t ongue I wou ld
no doub t have retor ted that
the s tudy of anc ien t
re l ig ions , c o m p a r i s o n of
mode r n o n e s and t heo logy
in genera l isn't my idea of a
relevent sub jec t e i ther. But
there y o u are. St i l l , I hope .
T h e r e I mean . A n d there
st i l l is that 4-letter wo rd , I
don ' t s e e m to know of a
better one. A letter in an
o ld t e c h n o l o g y S u n d a y
n e w s p a p e r f rom a s u b
ed i tor on a new one w h o is
not on ly a s h a m e d of h is
ac t ion (of s tay ing on the
staff) but not brave e n o u g h
to leave s t ruck me as
cu r i ous l y s t rong . A b l e to
put his name to a letter of
s u c h fo rce and c lar i ty as he
d i d , a b u s i n g h imsel f in the
nat iona l p ress , pe rhaps he
is one of a g r ow in g n u m b e r
of peop le e q u i p p e d with
the sk i l l s to surv ive in an
age , and a Br i ta in , l ong
g o n e past, never I th ink to
re turn. I don ' t b e m o a n its
loss or w ish for it to return,
mere ly that what rep laced it
hasn' t tu rned out to be all
that it p rom ised to be.
Woolgatherer
Friday 21 February FELIX
Bo Peep Ci ty and G u i l d s were
granted permiss ion to park
their masco t B o outs ide the
S c i e n c e M u s e u m dur ing
the of f ic ia l open ing on
W e d n e s d a y even ing of the
exh ib i t ion on '100 years of
Mo to r ing ' . Th i s move was
in tended to gain C & G s o m e
'needed publ ic i ty ' , sa id the
mechan ics , Pau l Ma l lone ,
Luke Wa lke r and Ed
Ash fo rd .
T h e car was parked on
the pavement outs ide the
museu m ent rance for just
The last
Word O n T u e s d a y G u i l d s
Pres ident Roger P reece
gave a talk on ' J e s u s the
last word on Man ' .
Mr P reece sa id that J e s u s
was a good moral ist and
preacher but that he wou ld
be regarded as a ' lunat ic ' if
he made his c la ims today.
But despi te this J e s u s d ied
for the sa lvat ion of
everyone.
Mr P reece said that he
had been brought up as a
Chr i s t i an s i nce the age of
five but he ques t ioned
re l ig ion in his teens and
that now as a Chr is t ian he
is sti l l learn ing about his
faith.
He then out l ined the
steps necessary to b e c o m e
a Chr i s t i an .
Ennals
Write R i c h a r d Enna l s , ex -
research manager of the
C o m p u t i n g Depar tment at
IC, has writ ten a letter to
M P s , exp ress ing his
conce rn s over SDI . Mr
Enna ls , who res igned
recent ly in protest against
Br i ta in 's invo lvement in
SDI , sugges ts that the
project may have been a
factor in the interest g iven
to s u c h compan ies as
West land and Br i t ish
Ley land by U S compan ies .
He a lso exp resses his belief
that, if the Pen tagon were
to have its way, a w ide
range of t echno log ies
wou l d be l iable to be
c lass i f ied as having a
mil i tary app l i ca t ion .
over an hour, and at t racted
a fair amoun t of at tent ion.
Severa l peop le came up
and chat ted with the
m e c h a n i c s and C & G
Pres ident Roger P reece .
B o , of f ica l ly desc r i bed as
the 'Pres ident 's Char io t ' , is
the o lder of the only two
J a m e s and B r o w n e
T o n n e a u s still in ex is tence.
It was manufac tu red in
1902 in Hammersm i t h and
was one of the first cars to
be des igned ent i rely in th is
country .
Dav id B rennan was
a c c u s e d of threaten ing
rape after the R S M
Va len t ines party last week.
T h e w o m a n in ques t ion , a
Meta l lu rgy student, sa id
that he had threatened her
with rape in the women ' s
toi lets. T h e po l i ce were
ca l led at her boyf r iends
request, and Mr B rennan
was arrested. C h a r g e s were
not p ressed after the
w o m a n was interviewed by
the po l ice . Mr B rennan has
been banned f rom C o l l e g e
and U n i o n p remises unti l
15th February 1987.
Take A
D o u g l a s A d a m s , author of
the s u c c e s s f u l 'H i tch H ike rs
G u i d e to the G a l a x y '
at t racted a large aud ience
when he ta lked to W e l l s o c
on M o n d a y .
M r A d a m s was g iven an
enthus ias t ic recept ion . H e
spent two ' hou rs reading
ext racts f rom his books
before invi t ing ques t ions
f rom the aud ience . Dur ing
the talk he ment ioned the
poss ib i l i ty of a 'H i t ch
H ike rs G u i d e ' f i lm and
a n n o u n c e d his intent ion to
travel to A m e r i c a by
wa lk ing over the f rozen
Ber ing Strai ts next year.
Later in the even ing M r
A d a m s au tog raphed cop ies
of his books wh i ch were on
sa le in the Bo t Z o o
C o m m o n R o o m .
Tight
Budget
The U n i o n F i n a n c e
Commi t t ee met last
Thu rsday to d i scuss the
expend i tu re est imates
submi t ted by the Un ion ' s
subcommi t tees . T h e
commi t tees inc lude those
represent ing c lubs , the
const i tuent co l l ege un ions ,
wel fare, and external
affairs. Dur ing the meet ing
it was agreed that the
subcommi t t ees shou ld re
examine their c l a ims w h i c h
co l lec t ive ly were beyond
the U n i o n s budget. It was
a lso agreed that c l ubs
wh i ch had not submi t ted a
c la im wou ld receive no
extra money next year.
Duet for O n e , a L o n d o n
C a n n o n F i lms P r o d u c t i o n ,
was being f i lmed at the
Alber t Hal l on M o n d a y and
Tuesday . D i rec ted by And r i
Kancha lavsky and
p roduced by M e n a h a n
G o l a n and Yo ran G l o b u x , it
port rays a concer t
v io l in ist 's s t ruggle against
the c r ipp l ing d isease
Mul t ip le Sc le ros i s .
Ju l ie A n d r e w s plays the
lead role a c c o m p a n i e d by
A l a n Bates, as her husband
and c o n d u c t o r / c o m p o s e r ,
S
Organise Benefits Demo
N U S L o n d o n are
o rgan is ing a demons t ra t ion
about benef i ts next
Wednesday . S tuden ts are
s u p p o s e d to gather at
C o u n t y Hal l at 12 noon .
T h e demonst ra t ion wi l l
then go to the D H S S . IC
U n i o n wi l l tak ing part in the
demons t ra t ion . P e o p l e
go ing on the demonst ra t ion
sho'uld gather at Beit A r c h
at 11.30am.
Maxne l l C e d i o s , as her
psychiat r is t , and Ruper t
Everett (of ' Danc e wi th a
St ranger ' fame) who plays
her pupi l and concer t
partner.
B a s e d on a stage play by
T o m K e m p i n s k i , or ig ina l ly
written for his wife F ranc is
De L a T o u r a n d Dav id
Delegser , it was ext remely
success fu l in L o n d o n
dur ing 1980 and is
expec ted to be re leased in
February 87.
College Accomodation Application forms for new and re-
applicants to halls/houses and head tenancies are available today (21st February) from Student Services.
Applications close Friday 5th March at 4pm
Union Bar
T
Wethereds 50p Strong Lager 55p
Live Music
Duet For One
FELIX Friday 21 February
Ladders
M y f r iend M o b i u s is a
ded i ca ted p u z z l e fanat ic .
S o add i c ted is he in fact,
that he con t i nua l l y invents
p u z z l e s f rom everyday
s i tua t ions (much to my
a n n o y a n c e ) . T h e o ther day ,
for e x a m p l e , he to ld me
that on his way to c o l l e g e
he was wa l k i ng d o w n a
sma l l a l l eyway beh in d his
h o u s e T h e a l l eyway w a s 5
feet w ide . T w o ladders
were p laced s o that e a c h
ladder t o u c h e d the base of
the oppos i t e wal l to that
w h i c h it was l ean ing o n ,
a n d they bo th leaned
aga ins t di f ferent wa l ls . O n e
ladder was 16 feet l ong , the
other 11 feet long . What
M o b i u s wan ted to know
was ; c o u l d he, w a l k i n g in a
s t ra ight l ine parre l le l to the
a l l eyway , walk unde r both
ladders w i thout b u m p i n g
his head ( M o b i u s is
ex t reme ly unsupe rs t i t ous
and wi l l pu rpose l y walk
under l adders in d e f i a n c e
of superna tu ra l f o rces )?
M o b i u s wou ldn ' t tel l me the
answer , he sa id it wasn ' t
very di f f icul t a n d I s h o u l d
do it mysel f . But he d id say
that I shou ldn ' t take into
a c c o u n t the wid th of h is
head or the ladders . C a n
y o u tell me what a n s w e r he
g o t ? B y the way , M o b i u s is
5 feet 11 i nche s tal l .
R a n d o m l y se lec ted
w inne r wi l l rece ive £5.
A n s w e r s p lus c o m m e n t e tc
to the F E L I X o f f ice by
T u e s d a y l unch t ime p lease .
It s e e m s that the p r o b l e m I
set a few week s ago , t r icky
t r iang les, first a p p e a r e d in .
F E L I X four yea rs ago , in
Mar t i n S Tay lo r ' s exce l len t
S C A R A M O U C H E C o l u m n .
B e i n g qu i te a c lever puzz le -
it p r o b a b l y go t p a s s e d
a r o u n d unti l it r eached me,
so the credi t s h o u l d go to
Mar t i n . N o n e of the few
w h o entered knew th is ,
t h o u g h , s o no ha rm d o n e .
Wha t ' s in teres t ing is that,
back in 1982 Mar t in got
e leven co r rec t ent r ies ,
wh i l e I on ly got f ive
so lu t i ons in tota l ! H a s
in f la t ion s o r e d u c e d the
va lue of £5 s i n c e 1982?
A c t u a l l y I've been a bit .
d i s a p p o i n t e d genera l l y wi th
the r e s p o n s e to s o m e of my
more in terest ing p rob lems .
M y p re fe rence is t owards
insp i ra t iona l type p r o b l e m s
that need a f l ash of ins igh t
to so lve , rather than the
s l og it out permuta t ion
type, but the latter
invar iab ly get a better
r e s p o n s e . P l e a s e let me
k n o w what y o u prefer, o r
whe ther y o u th ink the
p r o b l e m s are too hard .
Valentine
Verisimilitude—Solution
A n d r e a sent O l i ve r ' s c a r d .
B a r b a r a sent Ne i l ' s c a r d
C h r i s t i n e sent Pete 's ca rd
D i a n a sent Luke ' s ca rd
E l i zabe th sent M ike ' s ca rd
A n d r e a was Pete 's s ister .
I got e leven ent r ies w h i c h
were all co r rec t s o y o u
o b v i o u s l y f o u n d th is qu i te
easy . T h e r a n d o m w inne r
was R i c h a r d S q u i r e , E l ec
E n g 1. Y o u c a n co l l ec t y o u r
£5 pr ize f rom the F E L I X
o f f ice after 1.30pm M o n d a y .
Pennies
Wel l , even wi th last week ' s
c l ues I st i l l rece ived no
ent r ies to th is p r o b l e m
pity, s i n c e I t hough t it
qu i te an in terest ing on
a n d not too di f f icul t . I
y o u though t about it,
anyway . Here ' s what I
made of it.
C o n s i d e r d raw ing a l ine
d o w n the cent re of the
table, then , w h e n y o u r
o p p o n e n t puts a c o i n d o w n
s o m e w h e r e , y o u put y o u r s
in exac t l y the s a m e point
but re f lected in the cent re
l ine.
T h i s m e a n s that at any
point du r i ng the g a m e the
pattern of c o i n s wi l l be
s y m m e t r i c a r o u n d the
cent re l ine, a n d y o u wi l l
a lways be ab le to put a
c o i n d o w n oppos i t e y o u r
o p p o n e n t ' s c o i n unti l there
are no g a p s left.
***** h o p e * f
l ines and ref lect in both of
these,
oo
o o
o o
o o
o o
o o
o o
O b v i o u s l y th is on ly w o r k s
if a) you r o p p o n e n t never
puts a c o i n on the cent re
l ine, and , b) y o u r
o p p o n e n t g o e s first. T h u s it
is not very sa t is fac to ry . T h e
next re f inement is to d raw
two p e r p e n d i c u l a r cen t re
t h u s exp lo i t i ng the
c o m p l e t e symmet r y of the
tab le . T h e p rob lem here is
that the cent re point does
not move, so if y o u r
o p p o n e n t ' s co in ove r laps
the cent re y o u won' t be
ab le to put y o u r s in the
re f lec ted pos i t i on . S t i l l , th is
s t ra tegy a lways wo rks if
y o u go first (s ince y o u c a n
nab the cent re pos i t ion a n d
then fo l l ow the o ld
st rategy) and wi l l p robab l y
work if y o u go s e c o n d , as
l ong as you r o p p o n e n t
never puts his co in over the
m idd le of the tab le.
Th i s is as far as I c o u l d
get wi th th is one . If th is
i nsp i res y o u to th ink of any
better s t rategies, p lease let
me know.
l
ANNOUNCEMEN T •TRAFFIC WARDENS—TO DEPT HEADS—A PLEA If you have a visitor who has to br ing in a car please contact the G A T E H O U S E (3395) and we will ar range a parking bay for you . Th is is important. C o n f u s i o n over bays shou ld be lessened! Thank you . •Coming soon Imperial C o l l e g e S y m p h o n y Orches t ra (with IC Cho i r )—Mah le r S y m p h o n y No 2—Fr iday 23 Feb, 8.00pm, Great Hal l , T icke ts £1.50 from Ha ldane Library, Orches t ra members, at the door. •Choir Rehearsal Sunday 23 Feb , Great Hal l , 11.00am. A n y o n e we l c o m e to s ing Mahler Symphony No 2.
•Mahler Resurrection Symphony
Only one more week to go.
•Stalls are needed for the fo r thcoming Rag Fete on 26 Apr i l next term. Wou ld you like a stal l? They shou ld ideally be entertaining and money- ra is ing so please have a think. Contac t Man Tai T s e u n g , Rag Secretary IC Un ion or C h e m Eng P igeon holes.
• M A H L E R 2, Choir Rehearsals A n y o n e interested in s ing ing in this
mammoth work is most we lcome to attend the fo l lowing rehearsals: -Sunday 23 Feb (Great Hai l) , 11.00-12.30pm, 14.00-15.30, Wednesday 26 Feb (Great Hall) 19.00-20.00pm, Friday 28 February (Great Hall) 17.15-18.15pm Conce r t 20.00pm. •The Fourth Day of the week on 301/999 your first level Mus i c P rogramme gives you Zer ra 1, who? L is ten 6-8.00pm Saturday. •Two brewery trips next week. See diary for detai ls.
ACCOMMODATION
•Single room in immaculate flat. Avai lab le N O W ! G a s Cent ra l Heat ing , te levis ion and te lephone. Contac t Rufus Short (Elec Eng U G P igeon holes) or ring internal 3440.
WANTED •Bass player to join two guitarists and drummer to play var ious covers and or ig inals , blues, funk, rock and bop inc lud ing , Po l i ce , Vapours , J o h n Waite, Huey Lewis , Robert Fray, Don Henley. A im ing for g igs f rom this summer . Own equipment , en thus iasm, image and talent essent ia l , t ransport a help, mus ic reading a lso desirable. Don't waste our t ime and we won't waste yours . Contac t Pau l Nai lur Phys i cs P G 3 , Blacket t cost M E N P Ext 6798 •Have you got a projection video system or v ideo moni tors or know of anyone who might have access to them? P lease contact Man Tai Tseung IC Un ion Off ice. Te rms
negot iable.
•Situations vacant Have you got what it takes to run Ci ty and Gu i l ds Un io n next year? Papers up Monday .
FOUND •At P ICOCON belt for light brown raincoat. See S F S O C for return.
LOST •Small , silver engraved bracelet. If f ound , p lease contact J Shepherd B i o c h e m 2.
FOR SALE •Fender Precision Bass B lack , maple neck, D i -marz io p ick-ups, badass br idge, 1971, Very good cond i t ion . £240 Including fl ight case . R ing 373 8399 evenings.
•Matching Technics Tuner (STZ55L) and Casset te Deck (M233x), cassette Deck Do lby B / C , d B X metal tape, tunner-quartz lock, 16 presets, auto-tune. Both excel lent Cond i t i on , only one and half years o ld . £65 each ono. Contac t Phi l Sparks through E E
Letter racks or phone 01 373 8714
and ask for me in Flat B1 .
•Tickets for Pr incess Ida, Frid and
Sat. A quali ty show at an af fordable
pr ice. T ickets avai lable f rom Level 2,
Sher f ie ld Bu i ld ing at luncht imes
SERVICING * REPAIRS
at
RICKY'S GARAGE
fPersonal service guaranteed.)
I» QUEENS GATE PLACE MEW*
SOUTH KENNNGTON.
LONDON S.W7
t « i roi.iai tsat
ENDSLEIGH INSURANCE SERVICES LIMITED
71 O l d Brompton R o a d
South Kens ing ton
L o n d o n S W 7 3 J S
Telephone 01-589 6783
Friday 21 February FELIX
It's almost all in the Mind or
The New Highway Code or
The New Baby's Names or
The New Family Tree
by Robert Dangoor
Published by R & D Publishers
20 Queen's Gate Terrace
London SW7 5PF
Tel: 01-589 4448
To be published 3rd May 1986
Price 50p
FILM A g n e s of G o d is an excel lent
f i lm. The int roduct ion to the
characters is indicat ive of
Norman Jen ison ' s intel l igent
contro l of character a n d plot.
Meg Ti l ly is bri l l iant as the
innocent nun, Sister Agnes ,
accused of murder ing her baby.
Her int roduct ion is first through
her pure and p ierc ing rel ig ious
s ing ing and then visual ly
shrouded in a heavenly light
(one of the many f ine examples
of photographer Sven Nykvist 's
contr ibut ions) . T h e protective
Mother Super ior , A n n Bancrof t ,
is first seen d isdainfu l ly
observ ing the psychiatr ist , Jane
Fonda , and then smi l ing away
and confess ing to a former
smok ing habit in excess of Ms
Fonda 's 'Two packs a
day...unfi l tered'. Jane Fonda
once again plays her usual
character, an independent ,
determined woman who doesn't
get pushed around by anyone.
The tranquil i ty of the convent
is shattered first by the
chi ldbir th sc reams of A g n e s and
then by the subsequent
d iscovery of a strangled baby in
her locked room. J a n e Fonda , Dr
L iv ingston, is appointed by the
court to determine whether
Agne s is mental ly fit to stand
trial. Th is then leads her into
conf l ict with the Mother Super io r
who resents the probing and
god less methods of psychiatry
and who fears that Dr
L iv ingston 's invest igat ions will
drive A g n e s away f rom G o d . S h e
also comes into conf l ic t with the
B ishop and the court authori t ies
who want a quick and c lean trial
and who appear to have little
sympathy for Agnes .
One of the great strengths of
this f i lm is the ambivalent
relat ionship between the Mother
Super io r and the psychiatr is t
whose background conta ins
many reasons to resent the
oppress ive and gui l t - r idden
nature of Cathol ic ism. Another
strength is the stunning
per formance of Meg Ti l ly who
makes a thoroughly conv inc ing
and worry ingly impressive loony.
She is a complete innocent
whose early life was severely
corrupted and whose educat ion
was terminated by her insane
mother. She has little knowledge
of body development and
regards the growth of breasts as
a tendency to f lab and that this
shou ld be combat ted by starving
herself to the th inness that she
sees in all the rel ig ious icons
around her. S h e has c o m e to
bel ieve that 'suffering is
beauti ful ' and that ' G o d hates fat
people ' . Her i nnocence a lso
leads her to believe very pecul iar
th ings about the or ig ins of
babies. The di rect ion by Norman
Jen i son is s imple and
uncluttered but yet very ski l led
with some wonder fu l set p ieces
such as the hy|. .osis scene with
the ever present oppress ive
Ca tho l i c i sm symbo l i sed by the
large c ross above Agnes . It is
probably the best f i lm so far this
year, and probably one of the
best of the year.
O n a complete ly different tack
is another f i lm to come out this
week, C o m m a n d o . In spite of
ending with 'o' l ike M a c h o or
R a m b o it is a good f i lm. What
saves it f rom being the standard
macho military mach ine against
the evil thousands is the
strength of the female
characters. They are there not
s imply as sex or love interests or
merely to be rescued or avenged
for, but are st rong capab le
characters essential to the
development of the plot. The
other strong point in this f i lm's
favour is it's sense of humour ; it
is del iberately very funny in
parts.
Co lone l J o h n Matr ix, A rno ld
Schwarzenegger , is the former
leader of an elite mil itary squad
who were instrumental in
depos ing an evil dictator and
instal l ing a democrat ic
government in a Sou th Amer i can
country. The aforement ioned
dictator then consp i res to k idnap
Matr ix 's daughter in order to
H
L A W R E N C E
Lady Chatterley's Lover
persuade him to assist the
dictator regain power. Of course
Arno ld is having none of this....
The humour in the fi lm is
largely int roduced through the
wonderfu l Rae Dawn C h o n g who
plays a stewardess, init ial ly an
unwi l l ing, but f inally a useful
and resourceful al ly to -Arno ld .
She is not only very witty but
also intell igent and capable ,
inc lud ing saving his life.
The ending is the usual one
man against imposs ib le odds,
but the f i lm does at least take
t ime to develop another side to
Matr ix 's character, that of the
loving father, and this is done
pretty well by Arno ld . A further
plus for the film is the lack of
pol i t ics, the baddies are not bad
because they have the wrong
ideo logy but because they have
dec ide ly ant i -social habits.
Anyway , I enjoyed it.
Th is is a good week for f i lms.
Another fi lm that opened
recently is the astonish ing
Streetwise, a documentary about
kids l iving on the streets of
Seatt le, Gateway to A laska . If
you didn't see it for yoursel f you
would f ind the situat ion these
chi ldren are in whol ly
unbel ievable.
The documentary reveals
some incredible attitudes
amongst the kids for their
parents, 'They're part of my past'
K im , 16, and the parents for their
kids. 'It's a phase she's go ing
through ' says a mother about
her prostitute daughter who is
p ick ing up cl ients before her
first per iod.
The fi lm contains some great
mus ic (though not enough) by
T o m Waits and a wonderfu l
version of 'Teddy Bears P i cn i c '
by Baby Gramps . T h o u g h the
f i lm is open to the well founded
charge of voyeur ism, it is made
with honesty and sympathy and
the presentation of the material
(92 minutes from 56 hours of
film and 26 hours of interviews)
shows a genuine concern for the
plight of the ch i ldren, and is a
credit to the cameraman,
director Martin Bel l and editor
Nancy Baker.
It is always compe l l i ng ,
somet imes funny and somet imes
tearfully poignant, take a deep
breath and go and see it.
0
'Fancy a Quickie?'
'How much luv?'
'£2.95'
Being given a copy of L a d y
Chatter ley's Lover for Valent ines
Day, I dec ided to review it for all
you love/ lust (delete as
appl icable) hungry IC students.
It really is remarkable how by
defy ing convent ion a mediocre
book such as this receives the
adulat ion worthy of a work of
gen ius—which it certainly isn't.
Perhaps his early death gave
him his myst ical popular i ty.
The story is about the
ar istocrat ic C o n s t a n c e having an
affair with Mel lors, her d isabled
husband 's gamekeeper , gett ing
pregnant and leaving her stately
home. Th is is all fairly
predictable but doesn' t quite
come off especia l ly at the end
when the plot te lescopes
somewhat—in fact the book is
downr ight bor ing, despi te the
relatively rare ' juicy bits' that
generat ions of voyeurs have
rummaged for.
Throughout this book I had
the impress ion that D H
Lawrence was a misogynis t of
the highest ca l ib re—women
should be seen and not heard,
and certainly not have an
orgasm unless their (male)
sexual partner is having one at
the same time. Whatever the
dub ious w isdom of two people
who hardly knew each other
having sex, 'Lady Chat ter ley '
showed women as primari ly for
mens' grat i f icat ion, wh ich
reveals him to be as narrow
minded as the so-ca l led
Vic tor ian prudes.
It's late in the year, and there's
no grant left, but co l lege food is
inedible and the k i tchens
covered in grease and moving
fur balls. So lu t ion—take the
bank manager out for a meal at
Le Bis t ingo and let her /h im pay.
Unl ike the Stockpot (behind
Harrods) or the Kwal i ty Cur ry
House (near South Ken station),
Le Bis t ingo isn't the cheapest of
nutrient retail businesses. Its
about £10-£15 per head but you
get what you pay for, wh ich can
be 3/4 courses of exquis i te
French food plus wine—and the
port ions aren't mingy either.
O n my last visit my partner
and I tucked into fried
mushrooms—del i c ious ly light
and cr isp with a sharp tartare
sauce, then I fo l lowed with an
overcooked duck with orange
sauce—the only blight on the
meal, whi le my fr iend ate a smal l
veal esca lope. O n a previous
occas ion I en joyed a large d ish
of Boeuf Bourgu ignon (fancy
stew and rice) wh ich was very
tasty. We didn't fancy anyth ing
on the sweet trol ley, but the
large g lasses of ice c ream, nuts
and choco la te we f in ished with
were a fitt ing complement to the
meal.
Le Bis t ingo has a smal l
se lect ion of fairly good
wines—the house white at £3.95
a bottle was cr isp and kind to
the palate, and the service was
unobtrusive and fr iendly. You
can find this pleasant little den,
wh ich is very romant ic with
f lowers and cand les on the
tables, on O ld B rompton R o a d ,
just South of South Kens ing ton
Stat ion.
/
Friday 21 February
Barclays:
At a recent U G M , a motion on Barclays was due to be
debated before a quorum was called. Sean Dunlop and
Hugh Rubin look at the reasons why Barclays should be
boycotted.
In S o u t h A f r i c a , a c o u n t r y
of e n o r m o u s natura l
wea l th , mos t b l ack p e o p l e
l ive in c o n d i t i o n s of
ex t reme pover ty , wh i l e the
sma l l whi te popu la t i on
en joys one of the h ighes t
l iv ing s t a n d a r d s in the
wo r l d . In al l w a l k s of l i fe-
h o u s i n g , e d u c a t i o n , hea l th ,
etc the fac i l i t ies ava i lab le to
b lack S o u t h A f r i c a n s are
vast ly in fer ior to t hose
en joyed by thei r whi te
c o u n t r y m e n .
Th i s in jus t ice is p o s s i b l e
b e c a u s e b lack S o u t h
A f r i c a n s are d e n i e d al l
po l i t i ca l r ights a n d power .
The i r o r g a n s a t i o n s are
o u t l a w e d , thei r protest
bru ta l ly s u p p r e s s e d , and
their leaders i m p r i s o n e d ,
to r tured and o c c a s i o n a l l y
mu rde red by the secu r i t y
f o rces . T h e apar the id
sys tem has been
c o n d e m n e d by the Un i t ed
Na t i ons as a ' C r i m e aga ins t
human i ty ' .
In the present 'state of
e m e r g e n c y ' , over 900
p e o p l e have d i e d , the vast
major i ty k i l led by po i .~e
a n d a rmy . O v e r 15,000
peop le were de ta ined
w i thou t t r ia l ; up to 80% of
w h o m are be l ieved to have
been sub jec ted to p h y s i c a l
o r p s y c h o l o g i c a l tor ture. In
N a m i b i a , w h i c h is i l lega l ly
o c c u p i e d by S o u t h A f r i c a ,
the p rac t i ce of tor ture by
the 100,000 s t rong S o u t h
A f r i can a rmy of o c c u p a t i o n
o n p r i sone rs is a l s o
w i d e s p r e a d .
T h e surv iva l of apar the id
is not due so le l y to the
mass i ve rep ress ion by the
secu r i t y f o r ces ;
mu l t ina t iona l c o r p o r a t i o n s
a n d espec ia l l y the
in ternat iona l banks , a l so
have thei r part to p lay.
Severa l Br i t i sh b a n k s p lay
a n impor tan t part in th is ,
espec ia l l y B a r c l a y s , a n d the
merchan t bank S t a n d a r d
C h a r t e r e d (a l though
B a r c l a y s has by far the
b igges t s take of the two) .
B a r c l a y s is the on l y Br i t i sh
H i g h Street bank wi th a
major s take in S o u t h A f r i c a .
B a r c l a y s , v ia its S o u t h
A f r i c a n s u b s i d i a r y B a r c l a y s
Na t i ona l , c o n t r o l s 30% of
all b a n k i n g in S o u t h A f r i c a ,
and is the largest s i ng le
bank there—i ts asse ts
c o m e to a s tagge r i ng £6
b i l l i on , i n c l u d i n g over £145
mi l l i on in gove rnmen t
secur i t i es
T h e bank has taken part
in mass ive l oans to the
S o u t h A f r i c a n g o v e r n m e n t
and to state c o r p o r a t i o n s
i n c l u d i n g , in 1980, a £280m
loan to E S C O M , the state
e lec t r ic i ty c o r p o r a t i o n ,
w h i c h has recent ly
c o n s t r u c t e d a £560 m i l l i on
nuc lea r power s ta t ion .
In 1976, B a r c l a y s
p u r c h a s e d £6 mi l l i on of
G o v e r n m e n t D e f e n c e
B o n d s , the reby d i rec t l y
s u p p o r t i n g the S o u t h
A f r i c a n a r m e d fo r ces ,
a l t hough it was f o r c e d to
sel l t hem a yea r later after
an in ternat iona l ou tc ry .
Th i s is not the on ly l ink
that B a r c l a y s has had with
"Why does a National Serviceman need a bank?"
the S o u t h A f r i c a n Mi l i ta ry : -
Unt i l it was d i s b a n d e d in
1982, the C h a i r m a n of
B a r c l a y s Na t i ona l was a
m e m b e r of the S o u t h
A f r i c a n D e f e n c e A d v i s o r y
B o a r d , w h i c h adv i sed the
a r m e d f o r c e s o n a r m s
p rocu remen t . T h e bank has
a lso he lped f i n a n c e a rms
sa les to S o u t h A f r i c a ,
a l t hough the bank says
u n k n o w i n g l y .
A l t h o u g h S o u t h A f r i c a ' s
c o n t i n u e d o c c u p a t i o n s of
N a m i b i a is i l legal
( a c c o r d i n g to the U N a n d
the Internat ional C o u r t ) ,
B a r c l a y s d i s p l a y s its
a c c e p t a n c e of the
o c c u p a t i o n by ope ra t i ng
there; In fact B a r c l a y s
con t ro l s half of al l bank
depos i t s taken in N a m i b i a .
F r o m th is cen t ra l ro le in the
N a m i b i a n e c o n o m y ,
B a r c l a y s p lays a key part in
c h a n n e l l i n g prof i ts f rom the
coun t r y to S o u t h A f r i c a - i n
1978 B a r c l a y s d i rec ted 18%
of its depos i t s taken in
N a m i b i a there.
B a r c l a y s ins is ts that its
c o n t i n u e d p r e s e n c e in
S o u t h e r n A f r i c a is a
l i be ra l i s ing i n f l uence on the
apar te id reg ime , a n d is
bene f i c ia l to the b lack
c o m m u n i t y . Howeve r , the
bank rece ives m o r e m o n e y
f rom the b lack c o m m u n i t y
than is re turned to it in the
fo rm of l oans or
inves tments ; the reby
re in fo rc ing the e c o n o m i c
barr ier that apar the id
ef fects . A l s o , a po l l
c o n d u c t e d by G a l l u p last
s u m m e r f o u n d that 7% of
b lack S o u t h A f r i c a n s
s u p p o r t e d in ternat iona l
s a n c t i o n s aga ins t thei r
coun t r y .
In 1981, B a r c l a y s w a s
n a m e d by the U N as o n e of
the ma in mu l t ina t iona ls
m a k i n g a 'substant ia l
con t r i bu t i on to apa r the id ' .
B e c a u s e of its
invo lvement in S o u t h
A f r i c a , B a r c l a y s has been
b a n n e d f rom m a n y
un ivers i ty c a m p u s e s .
Howeve r , on severa l
o c c a s i o n s last year (in
F E L I X , the I C U H a n d b o o k
a n d P H O E N I X ) I C U pr in ted
ful l page adver ts for
B a r c l a y s Bank . W e th ink IC
s tuden ts s h o u l d be
d i s c o u r a g e d f rom o p e n i n g
a c c o u n t s wi th a bank w h i c h
is s u p p o r t i n g , f i nanca l l y , a
coun t r y w h o s e cons t i t u t i on
is b a s e d on a sys tem of
ins t i tu t iona l ised r a c i s m . Fo r
those reason , a mo t i on
ca l l i ng on the U n i o n to
c e a s e to print adver ts for
B a r c l a y s B a n k has been
submi t ted for d i s c u s s i o n at
the U G M on 6 M a r c h . W e
h o p e y o u wi l l c o m e a n d
suppo r t the mo t i on .
OF
HAIRMAN
T L E < <£l~L. YOU
Friday 21 February FELIX
Boat Club
Last Sa tu rday saw the Boa t
C l u b rac ing for the first
t ime this year in o p e n
compe t i t i on . IC had e ight
c rews entered in the
Hen ley H e a d s of the River
in a f ie ld of 160.
Bo th the el i te c o x e d and
sen io r c o x l e s s fours w o n
their d i v i s ions by
impress ive marg ins a n d
c a m e s e c o n d and th i rd
respect ive ly overa l l , l os ing
on ly to the el i te leauder
c o x l e s s four. A l t h o u g h
those were the on l y two
w ins of the day for IC, the
other c rews c a m e wel l up
in the rank ing . T h e two
sen io r B c o x l e s s fou rs
c a m e s e c o n d and four th in
their d i v i s ion , the faster
c rew on ly los ing by two
s e c o n d s . T h e sen io r C
c o x e d four c a m e e igh th in
their d i v i s ion , w o n by K jngs
C o l l e g e , L o n d o n .
T h e N o v i c e s q u a d w h o
on ly began row ing this
year, en tered two fou rs and
c a m e s e c o n d and seven th
in their d i v i s ion , the 'A '
c rew on ly los ing by seven
s e c o n d s to a c rew in a far
super io r boat a n d after
be ing he ld up by ano the r
boat. T h e w o m e n s ' nov i ce
c o x e d four, aga in rac ing in
o p e n compe t i t i on for the
first t ime, c a m e four th .
T h e s e resul ts are very
e n c o u r a g i n g for the future,
espec ia l l y as the top two
c r e w s now c o m b i n e to fo rm
the first VIII, g o i n g on to
race the l ikes of O x f o r d
and C a m b r i d g e .
Biochem Soc
After a term of c l andes t i ne
mee t ings in seedy ca fes . A
term of ga ther ing under
hazy e lec t r i c l ight ref lected
f rom ye l l ow ing wa l lpaper .
T i red fana t i cs pass br ief ly
on f rosty s tat ion p la t forms
to hand over g r u b b y
m e s s a g e s .
W h o are these peop le?
What is this s t range
u n d e r g r o u n d s o c i e t y ? We l l
the t ime has c o m e for the
truth to be b rough t to l ight.
T h e Imperial C o l l e g e
B i o c h e m i c a l S o c i e t y
(prev ious ly k n o w n as the
B i o c h e m i s t r y L ibera t ion
Front) p roud l y a n d loud ly
p resen ts its lecture of the
year, k ind ly s p o n s o r e d by
the B i o c h e m i c a l Soc ie t y , is
to be held in the P i p p a r d
Lec tu re Thea t re on
T h u r s d a y Feb 27 at 1.00pm
and is ent i t led ' P h e r e m o n e s
and H u m a n Interact ion ' . It
wi l l add a who le new
m e a n i n g to you r ideas of
b o d y l anguage and pe rhaps
exp la in the mys tery of why
s o m e peop le wear Brut 33 !
S o for t h o s e of y o u w h o
have m i ssed out on our
events so far be there, for
th is o n e (no secre t h a n d
s h a k e s necessa ry ) .
Cycling Club
O K then , whe re were y o u
all last S u n d a y ? In bed
p robab ly . Th ree peop le met
at 10.00am for the week l y
C y c l i n g C l u b S u n d a y run,
and we d e c i d e d
u n a n i m o u s l y to z ip d o w n
the A 3 . Off we set, d id we
have a h e a d w i n d ? It
cer ta in ly felt l ike the w ind
was aga ins t us but we
never the less m a n a g e d to
keep up a fair pace . T h e
o r ig ina l p lan was to pay the
inhab i tan ts of D o r k i n g a
shor t visit, but after we
m issed the tu rn ing , w e
e n d e d up in G u i l d f o r d
whe re Mars B a r s and C o k e
were the o rder of the day .
T h e tr ip back was di f f icul t ,
as we f ound out that we
were now c y c l i n g into a
fa i r ly s t rong w i n d — w e had
the w ind beh ind us on the
w a y there! However , we sti l l
ar r ived back in S o u t h
K e n s i n g t o n just after
2 .00pm.
C o m e on all y o u cyc l i s t s !
M a k e 10.00am next S u n d a y
a date for a c y c l e r ide its
not that ear ly , a n d a n y w a y
the f resh air is cer ta in to
wake y o u up pretty qu i ck l y .
P S M a y 24th is a date to
keep free for the B i c y c l e
Be l l e -a de l ight fu l tr ip
t h rough the C o t s w o l d s wi th
a mass ive tea a f terwards.
Fo r more deta i ls turn up on
T h u r s d a y , 12.30, S o u t h s i d e
U p p e r L o u n g e .
Guilds
O n M o n d a y papers go up
for e lec t i ons to the C i t y
and G u i l d s U n i o n
Execu t i ve . The re are a
n u m b e r of exc i t i ng ,
c h a l l e n g i n g , sa t is fy ing j obs
for c a n d i d a t e s of the r ight
ca l ib re . T h e s e inc lude : -
President Mas te r of
t rad i t iona l U n i o n act iv i t ies
s h r o u d e d in mys t i c i sm
s ince t ime i m m e m o r i a l .
Hon Secretary Incred ib ly
impor tan t pe rson w h o d o e s
so m u c h , s p e c i a l i s e s in
F reshe rs d inne rs .
Academic Affairs Officer
Wears smar t sui ts a n d
k n o w s all the impor tant
peop le in C o l l e g e ; S i ts on
lots of commi t t ees .
Entertainment Officer
M a s t e r m i n d s the G u i l d s
Ents o rgan i sa t i on ,
ca rn iva ls , ba l ls , cock ta i l
par t ies, En te r ta inments wi th
sty le.
Publicity Officer S o m e b o d y
has to tell the peop le !
C o n t r o l s the G u i l d s Pr in t
Uni t .
Old Centralians
Representative L i a s e s wi th
past s tuden ts a n d meets
lots of peop le w h o have
g o n e t h rough IC a n d l ived
to tell the tale.
P a p e r s are d o w n on the
28th Feb Don ' t be put off if
you 've not had m u c h
e x p e r i e n c e in G u i l d s . Y o u
c o u l d be the o n e for the
job . C o m e to the of f ice and
f ind out.
S&G
I have wri t ten this ar t ic le
b e c a u s e the paper has
been d e c i d e d l y weak on
S & G tr ips recent ly . S o for
all y o u poo r s tudents out
there c o o p e d up in beds i ts
and f lats s tud ious l y put t ing
you r al l into you r work
here 's a breath of the
S n o w d o n i a air. Yet ano the r
g l i m p s e of that wonde r fu l
f r eedom that eve ryone w h o
has a stout pair of legs,
waterproof c l o t h i n g , s t rong
boo ts , a map , to rch and
c o m p a s s a n d the wi l l to get
away f rom it all c a n
e x p e r i e n c e .
Un fo r tuna te ly S n o w d o n i a
t r ips wi th S & G a lways fal l
into the s a m e pat tern, and
after 3 years , its b e c o m i n g
a bit bo r i ng . First on
Sa tu rday there 's a c r o w d
ready to at tempt the
S n o w d o n h o r s e h o s e , seven
of the f inest up land mi les in
Grea t Br i ta in , wonde r fu l
s c e n e r y and a t ru ly
en joyab le walk, but is it sti l l
en joyab le w h e n eve ryone
g o e s for it eve ry t ime? I
k n o w I don' t en joy c r o w d s ,
espec ia l l y on C r i b G o c h
w h e n half of them are
c o m i n g towards y o u . T h e
kni fe edge b e c o m e s t r icky
then , s o as h a p p e n s most
years a sma l l con t i ngen t
(about 12 of us, forty were
on the tr ip), headed for
T ry fan and the G l y d y r s .
A g a i n an en joyab le
s c r a m b l e wi th s o m e g o o d
w a l k i n g . Th i s t ime t h o u g h
the weather was aga ins t us,
too w i n d y by half and
d a n g e r o u s as T ry fan was
cove red in ice. N i n e of us
c a m e d o w n after get t ing
three quar ters of the way
up, app rox ima te l y 2700 feet
above s e a level . We had
taken the Nor th r idge but
f ound it too icy nearer the
top. In years past
Sa tu rdays g r o u p s have
headed for the C a r n e d d s
(Kev in and Pete in 1985)
but I have never heard of
a n y o n e g o i n g for M o e l
S i a b o d (2860) G R 708545,
E l id i r Fawr (3030) G R
612613, C a r n e d d y F i husb
(2695) G R 621 628,
M y r n y d d Per fedd (2665)
D R 623 618, F o e l - y o c h
(2727) G R 628 611, Y Foe l
g o e h ( M o e l - y - C a s e g )
(2636) G R 582 678, Ga i t y
O g o f (2499) G R 587686 I
know they are lower but
they ' re but they ' re ideal in
w o r s e / b a d weather .
A t tempts c o u l d be made for
Pen yr He lg i - du (2622) G R
726626. C o m e on S & G
w iden you r e x p e r i e n c e ,
dont just rely so ley on
t rad i t ion.
It's g o o d fun a n d most
peop le en joy it. C o m e on ,
l iven it up. D o s o m e more
exp lo r i ng , g ive it a try!
i d
F i rm ly c l u t c h i n g his l oo fah ,
the wri ter w o n d e r e d what
to do next. H e knew what
he wou ld l ike to do next.
But, he m u s e d , it was
p robab l y i l legal a n d
a n y w a y the nearest farm
was mi les away . H is ear ly
m o r n i n g rever ie was
d is tu rbed by a stoat f ly ing
in th rough the ba th room
w i n d o w a n d s t r i ck ing h im
c i a r p l y on the c r a n i u m .
Ret r iev ing the
unfor tunate ly beast f rom
the w a s h b a s i n , the wri ter
found a note t ied a r o u n d its
neck . Wri t ten in g reen
c r a y o n , the note read as
fo l lows : K U M T O T H E
N E C K S T Q T M E A T I N G O R
I'LL K IK Y O R H E D I NN '
S o m e of the wr i t ing was
jo ined up, he noted
appra i s ing l y , that must
have taken the C h a i r m a n
hours .
A r r i v ing at the meet ing
ear ly , the wri ter was met by
the irate c h a i r m a n . T h e
latter was , as a lways ,
immacu la te l y d r e s s e d ,
spo r t i ng a three p iece suit
of f inest red s t r iped
wa l lpaper , c o m p l e t e with
ma tch ing c h e q u e b o o k .
' N o w look ' , b e g a n the
c h a i r m a n , ' you have m i ssed
three meet ings in a row.
A n y more of this
absen tee i sm a n d I sha l l
have to take away your
execu t ive perks. '
S u c h a s ? ' Inqui red the
wri ter. ' U s e of the execu t i ve
asht ray ' s n a p p e d the
c h a i r m a n , w h o f requent ly
s n a p p e d under p ressure . At
this the wri ter b e c a m e pale
and s i lent , a n d l i s tened
attent ively wh i le the g roup
p lanned an a r s o n at tack on
the A lber t Ha l l 'just for a
laf f . T h e fo l l ow ing m o r n i n g
the stoat reg is tered with
B U P A .
FELIX Friday 21 February 11
Indoor
Cricket
The day started b leak ly at
'5 .00am at Beit and
con t inued right up to the
end of the day at 8.30pm
outs ide Ae ro . T h e days
events were domina ted by
the van. S o m e
incons idera te and probab ly
p issed Bastard f rom C & G
had c h u n d e r e d in the van
and it stank. T h e journey to
Brune i was not bad, the
roads were c lear but Cap t
Br idger 's dr iv ing left .
someth ing to be des i red .
Due to some excel lent
nav igat ion by Le P o i s s o n
we arr ived half an hour
early and p icked our 7th
man up f rom Uxb r i dge
stat ion before return ing to
the g round . It took the
umpi res about 45 minutes
to fix the p i tch before we
took on the pro fess iona l
Brune i s ide. Cap t Br idger
batted well in the face of
t ight bowl ing and f ie ld ing
to return with 25. K ing and
Devon were out qu i ck l y
then Turner and Wright
batted well as did Br idger
on his return. H a m m e r was
run out wi thout fac ing as
IC c l o s e d on 125 for 5 f rom
12 overs. T h e bow l ing d id
not match up to the batt ing
as Brune i k n o c k e d the runs
off for the loss of two
wickets with an over to
spare. H a m m e r be ing the
on ly bowler to c o m e out
with any credi t as he
bow led his 3 overs for on ly
16 runs. After a qu ick visit
to P i zza Hut in Uxb r idge ,
we watched Brune i paste
East A n g l i a . We then took
on Sur rey . The early
bowl ing of Wr ight and
Devon restr icted Sur rey but
later on with some smi l ing
they sco red freely against
Br idger and Turner , so
c lose on 112 for 4 f rom 12
overs. IC responded in f ine
fash ion with Fish and
Devon str ik ing the ball wel l
with F ish sco r i ng the
fastest 25 of the day f rom
on ly 11 bal ls in 3 overs
inc lud ing a 6. In the midd le
IC c rumb led a bit with
Devon , K ing and Turner
gett ing out in qu ick
s u c c e s s i o n . Br idger and
Wright then took the sco re
to 102 with 10 needed f rom
2 overs. Br idger was run
out fo l lowed by Wright who
s tood and watched when
he shou ld have run. Th is
left F ish to sco re 7 on his
own . A 3 fo l lowed a 2 and
with 3 bal ls to go he was
run out leaving Sur rey
w inners by 2 runs. Brune i
Cricket
UAU Indoor Competition
IC v Brunei
IC 125 for 5 (72 overs) (Bridger 52, Wright 26, Turner 27 not out) 3runel 127 for 2 (77.5 overs) Brunei won by 4 wickets
v Surrey
Surrey 112 for 4 (72 overs) '
IC 110 all out (11.3 overs) (Fish 31,
Surrey won by 2 runs Bridger 23, Dewan 20)
IC v Univ East Anglia
IC 55 all out 6.2 overs) (Dewan 17) U E A 56 for 4 (8 overs) (Dewan 2 for 12) UEA won by 2 wickets
Rowing
Henley Fours Head
Crew
Elite 4 -
Senior A 4-
Senior B 4- (A Crew)
Senior B 4- (B Crew)
Novice 4 -
Women's Nov ice 4^-
pasted Sur rey and IC vs
U E A was just a c a d e m i c . IC
reversed the order and
fai led badly to get all out
for 55. U E A were in s o m e
di f f icul ty at 20 for 3 but
then they sco red 18
( inc lud ing) 2 s ixes in the
on ly over f rom Le P o i s s o n
and then they won by 2
w icke ts . A l l one hopes for
is that we play far better
ous ide in the S u m m e r U A U
games.
Team: Dave Bridger, Tim
Harmer, Lionel King, Rajiev
Dewan, Andy Wright, Sean
Turner and Gareth Fish and
thanks to Julie Davies (the
Capt wife) for scoring and
looking after us.
Division Position Overall 1st 2nd 1st 3rd 2nd 11th 3rd 2nd
Water
polo
Fo l l ow ing a s low start to
the new year the water-
po lo squad had begun to
red iscover s o m e of the
sk i l ls that took them to the
U A U Fina ls to be held at
Sh rewsbu r y at the end of
the month .
An ear ly defeat by a
s t ronger heavy s ide that
lost to Imperial last term
d id noth ing for our mora le
and the absence of two key
p layers didn't help. After
two matches were
cance l l ed due to oppos i t i on
Wednesday Results Hockey ULU League
R S M 1sts 1
IC Ists 2 Football
ULU League
IC 1sts 3
iC 2nds 1
R S M Ists 4 Upper Reserves Cup Semi-Final
IC 4ths 2
R C S
Q M C
Q M C
St Marys
IC
U C
ISts 2
1sts 2
Ists 3
1sts 1
3rds 0
3rds 3
Thursday February 27th
Inter C C U Swimming Gala/Waterpolo
6.30pm IC Sports Centre
Come and have fun, whether getting wet or
supporting.
Prizes and 'refreshments' afterwards
Interested? Then contact:
Jane Ryder Physics 3 for RCS
Nigel Owen Room G13a for Mines
Clare Lupton ME1 for Guilds
pul l ing out at the last
moment a subdued team
reco rded their f irst w in of
1986 in a dif f icult match
against the W o m e n s
Nat iona l League c h a m p i o n s
Potters Bar Lad ies .
T h e return of A n d y
L a n g m a n to midf ie ld to ld in
our fo l low ing match aga ins t
Se lwor th wh i ch Imperial
won 10-7. A l t hough stil l not
100% fit our p layers
con t ro l led most of the
possess ion dur ing the
game. However defens ive
errors a l lowed several goa l s
against us, mis takes wh i ch
were not in ev idence in
D e c e m b e r when Imperial 's
mark ing was made t ighter.
Last Fr iday saw the
return of Steve Davis after
prot racted g landu lar fever
and his two goa ls ear ly in
the first quarter cont r ibu ted
to our unfor tunate win
against a less fit Avonda le
s ide. A l t h o u g h the g a m e
was quite s l owpace d
Imperial 's de fence seemed
m u c h safer with stalwort
work f rom J o h n s t o n and
Eas tman . Pass ing a lso was
qu i cke r and more accura te
in the midf ie ld with good
work in par t icu lar f rom
Paul R i c h a r d s o n a l though
he stil l cou ld use faster and
more accura te serv ice f rom
his w ingers Wi l l iams and
Ireland.
Cross
Country
The latest L o n d o n C o l l e g e s
League race was held on a
bu i ld ing site somewhere
near Sur rey Univers i ty .
Hav ing home advantage,
Sur rey managed to run out
their stars, and hence
c l o s e d the gap on us at the
top of the League . Th is was
despi te a good run by
Bryan G a m b l i n , exce l l i ng in
his natural habitat of knee-
deep mud .
Kee le was this year 's
venue for the B S S F
C h a m p i o n s h i p s . The team
arr ived more or less intact
due to the exce l len t dr iv ing
of J o n , 'was that a br idge '
Lea . IC prov ided half the
L o n d o n Univers i ty team,
wh ich f in ished a cred i tab le
5th in B U S F , whi le the
co l l ege team c a m e 15th in
U A U , boosted by a rare
appea rence of little Mike (is
that the right way round?)
Ba l l . Fur ther enter ta inment
was prov ided on the return
journey when a new
method of w indsc reen
c lean ing (or was it a novel
type of c i rcu i t t raining) was
tried by h is ho l iness P o p e
J o h n .
12 Friday 21 February FELIX
Five-a-side
A l t h o u g h reel ing f rom
sensa t iona l tab lo id
d i s c l o s u r e s a l l eg ing that
four of the IC s q u a d had
been f ound v a n q u i s h i n g in
the gutter ou ts ide D u r h a m ' s
t rendiest n igh t - c lub , c o a c h
R o b C l a r k e ' s foo tba l l i ng
el i te sti l l m a n a g e d to
s tumb le their way to the
semi - f ina ls of last S u n d a y ' s
tournament , before
admi t t ing defeat in o rder to
ca tch the last t rain h o m e .
H a n g o v e r s were l ifted
ear ly on as Dave L y n n e
main ta in ing a s c o r i n g run
w h i c h had begun the
.p rev ious night , put IC
ahead in the o p e n i n g g roup
game v B rad fo rd . H o p e s of
a g o o d start were d a s h e d ,
however w h e n B rad fo rd
equa l i sed with the last k ick
of the game ; the h e a d a c h e s
and dry mou ths s o o n
re turned.
U W I S T proved a t ough
nut to c rack in the s e c o n d
g a m e , as c h a n c e s c a m e
and went, a n d ano ther
s ta lemate s e e m e d l ikely
when t ragedy s t ruck.
E n g b e r g was harsh ly
ad judged to have
e n c r o a c h e d into his own
a rea , a n d the resul tant
penal ty , c l i n i ca l l y
d e s p a t c h e d , p l unged IC
deep into a c r is is .
Fear ing his job was on
the l ine, R o b C l a r k e
p ressed the pan i c but ton
and rang the c h a n g e s ,
d r o p p i n g t o p - s c o r e r L y n n e
and the eve r -popu la r but
s t range ly leg-weary (?!)
G o l d s w o r t h y for the f inal
g r o u p ma tch . His
con t rovers ia l moves l ooked
to be v ind ica ted w h e n A lex
L u n g h i f i red h o m e a beauty
on ly for the p ressures of
m anagem en t to return as
No t t i ngham equa l i sed
aga ins t the run of p lay.
Wi th the title s l i pp ing away ,
IC's t ravel l ing suppor t
tu rned sp i te fu l ly on the
be leagured C l a r k e , and
ca l l s for h is head g rew
dea fen ing . E n g b e r g
rea l is ing his manage rs '
despera te pl ight ,
b l u d g e o n e d his way
th rough three tack les , a n d
wi th the referee's whis t le
p o i s e d for ac t i on , c r a s h e d
the ball into the roof of the
net for a sensa t iona l
w inner .
S n e a k i n g th rough one
g o a l d i f fe rence, IC were
pa i red with B i r m i n g h a m in
the quar ter - f ina ls . A n ashen
faced B a r n e s kept h is
p lace , m u c h to the d isgus t
of the sti l l axed
G o l d s w o r t h y , a l t hough
L y n n e was res tored to add
s o m e m u c h needed c h a r m
to the f ront l ine. T w o qu i ck
goa l s f rom our latter day
R o m e o ki l led the tie as a
spec tac le and the
enter ta inment va lue w a s
not a ided by the 2nd half
a p p e a r a n c e of s topper
C l a r k e in o rder to protect
the p rec i ous lead. Wi th
on ly h o m e favour i tes
D u r h a m now s tand ing
between IC a n d a cove ted
f inal spot , the talk was of
g lo ry a n d meda ls a n d beer
unti l it was d i scove red that
ano ther w in wou ld mean a
n ight on the s n o w - c o v e r e d
c o b b l e s of T y n e s i d e .
C o m m o n sense preva i led
and the O x b r i d g e rejects
were gi f ted a c o u p l e of
s imp le s t r ikes, thereby
hand ing L o u g h b o r o u g h an
eas ie r than expec ted r ide in
the f ina l . T h e Spor t s
sc ien t i s ts were no doub t
re l ieved that thei r mos t
d a n g e r o u s o p p o n e n t s had
by that t ime boa rded the
6.37 to L o n d o n K ing ' s
C r o s s , safe in tne
k n o w l e d g e that the
inhab i tants of D u r h a m were1
g lad to see the back of :
them.
Boat
Henley Fours Head
Imperial C o l l e g e Boat C l u b
p i cked up ano the r two w ins
at the w e e k e n d a n d were
c l o s e to w inn ing severa l
o ther d i v i s ions . T h e El i te
c o x e d four hav ing b roken
their f in a n d rudder on the
way to the start requ i red
Bi l l M a s o n to make hasty
repairs Desp i te th is and
star t ing out of pos i t ion they
won their d i v i s ion weav ing
their way th rough many
s lower c rews . T h e other
w in c a m e for the sen io r A
C o x l e s s four. Bo th S e n i o r
B c o x l e s s a n d N o v i c e
c o x e d fou rs c a m e s e c o n d
in their d i v i s ions .
T h e overal l pos i t ion of the
top two c r e w s is most
e n c o u r a g i n g as they were
on ly beaten by a L e a n d e r
c rew rac ing on the h o m e
water.
o
Sports Centre
Are you making the most use
of the Sports Centre?
It m a k e s a n ice c h a n g e to
wri te about a fac i l i ty for
s tuden ts that has not o n l y
i nc reased its serv ice , but
a lso ma in ta ined the s a m e
s tudent p r i ces s i nce
1983/84! Hope fu l l y , th is
ar t ic le wi l l insp i re more
s tudents at IC to use the
Spor t s Cen t re , a n d thus
ensu re that p r i ces s tay low.
Cur ren t l y it cos t s 30p for a
s tudent to have a s w i m or
use the mu l t i gym. Half an
hou r of s q u a s h cos ts 60p!
Whi ls t these facts may be
k n o w n to m a n y of y o u , y o u
may not be aware that:
• T h e Spor t s C e n t r e is fu l ly
o p e n on S u n d a y m o r n i n g s
f rom 9.00-12.30, ( recent ly
there have been empty
s q u a s h cour ts ! )
• T h e r e is ear ly m o r n i n g
s w i m m i n g f rom 7.30-8.30
on W e d n e s d a y morn ings .
P l e a s e con tac t the S p o r t s
C e n t r e staff if y o u want any
fur ther in fo rmat ion .
Season Tickets
Studen t S e a s o n T i c k e t s
cos t £7.50 and on ly £5.00 if
y o u are a m e m b e r of a c l u b
that uses the Spo r t s
Cen t re . ( N B m e m b e r s of
c l u b s s u c h as s q u a s h ,
s w i m m i n g and water po lo ,
c a n o e a n d Ri f le a n d P is to l
are reminded that they
mus t e i ther have a s e a s o n
t icket o r pay en t rance every
t ime they use the S p o r t s
Cen t re ) .
Weights Club free
weights Wednesday only
T h e IC We igh ts C u b now
has 80 m e m b e r s , but is not
represented by any o f f icers !
T h e We igh ts C l u b urgent ly
needs a C a p t a i n to
represent them on the
A C C .
Unt i l the We igh ts C l u b
gets o rgan i sed it is on ly
poss ib l e to reserve the Free
We igh ts R o o m in S o u t h s i d e
for T h e We igh ts C l u b on
W e d n e s d a y s f rom 11.30am
o n w a r d s , (start ing 26
February ) .
C o u l d a representat ive
(Cap ta in? ) of the We igh ts
C l u b p lease con tac t Pau l
D u b e n s k i v ia the U n i o n
Of f i ce or M e c h E n g 4, to
d i s c u s s h o w We igh ts C l u b
w ishes to con t i nue . O n c e
o rgan i sed the c l u b s h o u l d
be ab le to reserve extra
sess i on in both the Free
We igh ts R o o m a n d the
Spo r t s Cen t re Mul t i G y m .
FELIX Friday 21 February 13
1930h Physics LT1
Wellsoc Talk. Harry
Fairbrother gives a pract ical
gu ide to t ime and space
travel. Free to members .
53 Prince's Gate
Opsoc Easter Auditions.
Eve Southside Bar
Lowenbrau on draught
55p/pint plus chance to win a
Lowenbrau stein.
1 9 3 0 h
Concert Hall
Princess Ida by Gi lber t and
Sul l i van. O p s o c ' s annual
show. G o and see a qual i ty
per formance. Tickets:£2.50
(£2.00)
Eve Southside Bar
Disco
1015h Sainsbury's
Sainsbury 's still sell Sou th
Af r ican goods . Help the
campa ign to change their-
minds. Organ ised by IC and
Earl 's Cour t Ant i -Apar the id
G r o u p s .
1930h Concert Hall
Princess Ida by Gi lber t and
Sul l i van. Qual i ty
Per fo rmance.
1030h Concert Hall
Opsoc Clearing-Up. A s many people as can make it please.
1100h G r e a f Hall
Choir Rehearsal for Mahler 2.
A n y o n e welcome—just c o m e
a long .
1800h More House, 53 Cromwell
Road
Mass fo l lowed by bar supper
and talk — 'Women and
Minist ry ' — by S R
Hannah ,Soc ie t y of St
Franc is .
1230h Union Snack Bar
RAS Brewery Trip to Greene
K ing Brewery .Contac t J
Varga Phys i cs 3. T icke ts £3.
1330h 616A, Met & Mat Sci
Pakistan Society General
Meeting.
1430h * Upper Lounge
Fight Choreography. A
specia l workshop by
Dramsoc on all aspec ts of
stage f ight ing. A l l we lcome
1830h
County Hall
SDI Organ ised by Eng ineers
For Nuc lear D isarmament
Great Hall
Orchestra Dress Rehearsal
for Mahler 's 2nd S y m p h o n y
with cho i r
1200h ULU, Manning Hall
Working for a future. An
alternative careers fair
(organised by U L U Green
Group ) .
1245h Jazz Room
Big Band Practise. A l l
we lcome.
1300h Stans Lounge
Windsurfing Easter Trip.
Meet ing to take names and
f inal ise plans for trip to the
Gower (22nd-30th March) .
Pr ice of trip approx £30.
1315h Read LT, Sherfield
Humanities Debate on South
Af r ican sanct ions. Free to al l .
1800h
Union SCR
Wine Tasting. Don't forget
this week's event. T icket
ho lders only.
1930h
53 Prince's Gate
Opsoc Chorus Rehearsal. A l l
we lcome.
1230h Huxley 413
Methsoc T h e Wor ld
Wor ldwide ' led by Rev
Stewart Morr is , who has a
miss ionary posi t ion overseas.
Lunch:50p
1300h Elec Eng 403A
Hunken On Technology T im Hunken (Observer) talks
about Appropr ia te
T ec hno log y and his c locks .
Pippard Theatre
Pheremones. The B i o c h e m
S o c lecture of the year.
1700h
Union Snack Bar
RAS Brewery Trip to Ga tes
Brewery, Por tsmouth .
Con tac t J Va rga P h y s i c s 3.
T ickets £ 4
1830h Prince of Ornage Pub
Balloon Pub Outing.Meet
Souths ide Upper Lounge .
A s one f igment of my
imag ina t ion o n c e sa id to
another " there 's s o d all to
do half way to n o w h e r e " a
c o m m e n t w h i c h s e e m s to
go s o m e w a y toward
s u m m i n g up this point in
the year. A l l the init ial
en thus iasm s e e m s to be
peter ing out as though ts
turn to exam prepara t ion
fo l l owed by s u m m e r
ho l idays or jobs . T h i s is
whe re y o u beg in to s u s s
how apathet ic and bor ing
co l l ege can real ly be. Mos t
of y o u are p robab ly
hang ing a round in you r
o w n little g roups of f r iends,
go ing out to the same sort
of p laces and not bo ther ing
too m u c h about l ook ing for
some th i ng rad ica l l y
d i f ferent—al l fair e n o u g h in
its own way I s u p p o s e .
Fi t t ingly this year 's 'total
hype ' g roup S i c k S i c k
Spu tn i ck , or however y o u
p r o n o u n c e it, have c h o s e n
this t ime to re lease thei r
debut s ing le . Hav ing
a l ready devoted too m u c h
s p a c e to it I'll just say that
it ac tua l ly appears to be
G i o r g i o M o r o n or s o m e o n e
and has a tit le about ' love
miss i les ' w h i c h s e e m s l ike
it might have been p i n c h e d
f rom the spoo f f i lm 'Sp ina l
Tap ' .
If y o u in tend to wri te a
c o l u m n about a l ternat ives
to work, it s e e m s to me y o u
s h o u l d try and unders tand
some th i ng about the
s tudent p s y c h o l o g y .
Pe rsona l l y I must c o n f e s s
I'm stil l s t rugg l ing in this
f ie ld—at the moment th ings
s e e m to run a long the l ines
of ' labs and p rob lem sheets
are so ted ious , bo r ing and
un imag ina t i ve that any o ld
go re mov ie is l ikely to be
more menta l ly s t imu la t ing ' .
In fact the more I th ink
about it the more I c o m e to
the c o n c l u s i o n that the
wors t th ing about C o l l e g e
is that there is an
under l y ing t endancy to
dr ive peop les though ts
away f rom reali ty.
Be fo re I get car r ied away
wi th c o l u m n s about us al l
su f fer ing f rom m a s s menta l
i l lness I th ink I'll sk ip
st ra ight to the point (ca l l ing
y o u r readers a b u n c h of
nut ters is poor h o u s e s ty le
anyway ) .
O c c a s i o n a l l y even the
dul lest underg radua tes c a n
s h o w a potent ia l for
c o n c e r n about greater
th ings than their s tar t ing
sa lary (who wants to
e m p l o y a bor ing yupp ie
eng ineer w h o s e so le
interest is bank ba lance
co l l ec t i ng anyway? ) . Wh i l e
y o u all sit there
comfo r tab l y fo ld ing this
page into a paper dart to
lob at you r poor innocen t
maths lecturer mi l l i ons of
o ther poor i nnocen ts
a round the wor ld are be ing
ter ror ised, pe rsecu ted ,
exp lo i ted and tor tured by
gove rnmen ts less
rest ra ined than ours (and
y o u thought governments
were there to take care of
you) . T h e H u m a n R a c e
learns very s low ly f rom its
mis takes . But opper tun i t ies
to learn f rom his tory
a b o u n d in L o n d o n . O n e of
the best d o c u m e n t a r i e s of
how ty ranny af fects
o rd inary peop le was the
wr i t ing of A n n e Frank w h o
was a v ic t im of a reg ime
w h o s e h i d e o u s n e s s w a s
made un ique f rom many
o thers past and present
ma in ly by the sca le of its
horror . T h e r e is an A n n e
Frank exh ib i t ion at the Ma l l
ga l le r ies , Pa l l Ma l l unti l
M a r c h 2. En t rance is,
appropr ia te ly for the
c i r c u m s t a n c e s of many of
us, free.
W h i l e I'm in a 'se l f -n ih l is t '
m o o d I th ink I'll move on to
mus ic . P u n k may be dead
but that 's no reason to
avo id live g igs where the
e m p h a s i s is on gut
w r e n c h i n g power a n d
v i t r io l ic voca l con to r t i ons
(what a pre tent ious little
phrase) . T h e S w e d i s h
g r o u p Lea ther N u n last
tou red this coun t r y s o m e
years ago wi th T h r o b b i n g
Gr is t le , w h e n they b e c a m e
no to r ious for leav ing a trail
of r iots. T h e y return this
T u e s d a y 25 to play at the
Bu l l & Ga te , Ken t i sh T o w n ,
wi th Z o d i a c M i n d w a r p &
the Love R e a c t i o n . C o s t is
£3 for what s h o u l d be an
O T T g ig .
Hav ing hyped Hal f M a n
Half B i scu i t it wou ld be a
bit hypocr i t i ca l to s lag
them now, espec ia l l y
before I've ac tua l ly heard
all of their new E P , T h e
T r u m p t o n R io ts . But al l the
s a m e N ige l , Ne i l and the
boys appear to be hav ing a
tough t ime fo l l ow ing up
their init ial spark of gen ius .
If y o u want to get in on the
C a m b e r w i c k G r e e n punk
cul t then y o u c a n see them
at D ingwa l l s on T h u r s d a y
27 -pe rsona l l y I th ink it's a
c ruddy little ho le of a c l ub .
In fact, in genera l , I'd m u c h
rather go to a pub venue
than most of the L o n d o n
c l u b s - not on ly is the beer
less l ikely to be expens ive
f izzy water, but at the B u l l
& G a t e for ins tance the
ac tua l room itself is better.
B o u n c e r s f rom the po l i ce
state s c h o o l of a u d i e n c e
sub juga t ion are a b ig put
off at c l u b s too (the wors t
o n e s a lways wear bow t ies
l ike t hose at the C r o y d o n
U n d e r g r o u n d ) . S m a l l pub
g igs can be a g o o d night
out a n d all the g o o d band s
star ted sma l l o n c e . T h e
range is so vast that the
best sugges t i on I c a n make
is to c h e c k the mus i c
papers or T i m e Out . O n e
g i g I'm g o i n g to pe rsona l l y
is T w i c e Bi t ten at the
Pear ly K i n g , B r o m l e y - b y -
B o w , on T h u r s d a y M a r c h
16. Th i s is a very g o o d folk
venue and brews s o m e
exce l len t beer on the
p remises . I've got to be
carefu l not to forget the
un ion bar if I'm ta lk ing
about beer, maybe S e a n
wi l l get s o m e Irish folk
m u s i c for the next
p romot iona l even ing .
Can ' t th ink of any dro l l
t h rowaway quo tes to end
this week 's spe i l , and
anyway they take away all
the se r i ousness . But I've
obse rved that the best f i lms
are a lways mean ing fu l or
s ty l ish and are of ten re-run
at the S c a l a . T h i s al l
app l ies to A p o c a l y p s e N o w
and Dr. S t range love two
f i lms I go to see there
whenever I c a n . Bu t what
puzz les me is w h o goes to
see all the o ld R u s s M e y e r
f l i cks they run l ike 'Benea th
the Va l ley of the Leather
c l ad N y m p h e t s wi th B i g
K n o c k e r s ' . In the w o r d s of
Herber t D. R o s s the little
k n o w n b l ind U S d i rec tor of
the ear ly 70s "I don' t see
what its al l about ".
c
A
P
I
T
A
L
I
D
E
A
S
Bye for now folks.
Hack Race 1 Dave K ings ton , IC Un ion Deputy Pres ident has a n n o u n c e d that he wil l be con tend ing the post of U L U Pres ident . Mr K ings ton bel ieves that he can improve the Un ion ' s s tand ing with the Univers i ty of L o n d o n and the Government .
He is unhappy with the poor image U L U has presented in the past, part icular ly with its response to the Gove rnmen ts green paper, 'Educa t i on in the 1990s'. 'A s tudent body wh i ch doesn' t reason and argue clear ly is a waste of t ime', he added.
M r K ings ton is anx ious to increase the publ ic 's awareness of the p rob lems fac ing students. He feels
that his work in the Genera l
Un ion C o u n c i l and his
exper ience as a sabbat ica l
at IC wi l l s tand h im in good
stead.
IC Wel fare Of f icer Pete
Wi l son will be runn ing for
S c i e n c e and Eng ineer ing
Sena to r at U L U . Mr Wi l son
a ims to encou rage the
b roaden ing of S c i e n c e
cur r icu la , and the
improvement of C o m p u t i n g
and Maths sub -cou rses . He
is a lso very keen to make
the U L U Execu t i ve less
remote for s tudents at
Imperial .
'I have a c loser contact
with 'more ' S c i e n c e and
Eng ineer ing courses than
students of other Co l l eges '
he sa id .
Shattered Between £150-200 of
damage was done when the
w indow of the Sou ths ide
shop was s m a s h e d on
Tuesday even ing. T h e three
peop le conce rned had been
par t ic ipat ing earl ier in the
Gu i l ds ' F ie ld C u p . They
were found immediate ly by
the secur i ty guard , and
were interviewed by Mr
Reeves of C o l l e g e Secur i t y .
O n e of them was suf fer ing
f rom cuts to the face,
hands and leg; al l three
c la imed that they had
sus ta ined these injuries
after s l ipp ing on the steps
in front of the shop and
fal l ing th rough the w indow.
A l t hough Mr Reeves said
he was inc l ined to bel ieve
their story, the secur i ty
guard involved sa id that he
thought the inc ident was
no acc ident , and reported
that as he arr ived on the
scene , he saw the injured
student k ick ing at the
a l ready shattered shop
front. Mr Reeves is
invest igat ing the matter
further. N o one was
avai lable in the G u i l d s '
Of f ice for comment .
Discipline Sec t i ons of the p roposed
new C o l l e g e D isc ip l inary
Regu la t ions were rejected
by I C U C o u n c i l , meet ing
on M o n d a y even ing at the
C o l l e g e F ie ld Stat ion.
S i l w o o d Park.
The draft of the new
regulat ions a l lowed the
penalty imposed on
students found guil i ty of
m isconduc t to be increased
on appeal . Severa l
members of C o u n c i l spoke
out st rongly against
accep t ing this, say ing that
it was 'contrary to natural
just ice' . The present
regulat ions do not a l low
the appeal panel to increase the penalty, on ly to conf i rm or reduce it. T h e new code was drafted by M ichae l Ar thur , former Student Serv i ces Of f icer and now Ass is tant C o l l e g e Secretary .
C o u n c i l amended the draft chang ing the o f fend ing phrase so that the penalty may not be increased on appea l . T h e new regulat ions must be agreed by the Un ion before they can be adopted , so the ob jec t ions are l ikely to be accep ted by the Co l l ege .
tThere wil l be an exh ib i t ion
of d rawings and paint ings
by J o h n Dav idson in the
Conso r t Ga l le ry f rom
T u e s d a y 25th February
unti l Fr iday 21st M a r c h .
T h e exhib i t ion enti t led
The Chamonix Series
conta ins p ic tures f rom the
C h a m o n i x area in the
F rench A l p s .
The exhib i t ion has been
o rgan ised by C o l l e g e
Safety Of f icer Dr G o r d o n
Hargreaves. He desc r ibed
the paint ings as tend ing
towards a 'surreal
interpretat ion' .
Dr Hargreaves co l lec ts
paint ings himself and first
came across Mr Dav idson 's
work at the Art is ts ' Market
in Coven t G a r d e n . Th is
venue, wh i ch no longer
exists, gave unknown
artists the oppor tun i ty to
show their work. Dr
Hargreaves said he tries to
keep the styles and subject
matters of the exh ib i t ions
in C o l l e g e as varied as
poss ib le . He said that they
were usual ly wel l at tended.
No Confidence The Univers i ty of L o n d o n
Un ion avo ided a vote of no
con f idence on T u e s d a y at
Genera l Un ion C o u n c i l .
Roya l Ho l loway and
Bedford New C o l l e g e
Students ' Un ion had
or ig inal ly p roposed the
mot ion. After ta lk ing to the
Execut ive they dec ided to
wi thdraw the mot ion. T h e
U L U const i tu t ion, though,
meant that they were
unable to do this. T h e
Execut ive p roposed an
amendment pra is ing their
per fo rmance. O n a vote,
the amendment was
accep ted . T h e mot ion,
though, was rejected.
At the sam e meet ing an
ant i - rac ism mot ion was
passed a l though an
amendment that wou ld
have resul ted in U L U
adopt ing a 'no platform for
rac ism ' po l icy was rejected.
Hack Race 2 C h r i s Hendy has wi thdrawn
f rom s tand ing for the post
of ICU Pres ident . A t the
t ime of go ing to press J
Mart in Tay lo r and Chr is t ine
Ta ig are the only
contenders for the posi t ion
of Pres ident . R u n n i n g
u n o p p o s e d for Deputy
Pres ident and Honora ry
Secre tary are J a c k i e Pe i r ce
and Dave Co l l ey respect ively. Dave J o n e s and Nige l A tk inson have their names down for the post of F E L I X editor. Papers are up until 5.30pm next Fr iday. A n y o n e interested in runn ing for a sabbat ica l shou ld see one of the present sabbat ica ls as s o o n as poss ib le .
16 Friday 21 February FELIX
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