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Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

April 2017

kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu

413-597-3542

Manager, Training and Development

Office of Human Resources

Presented by Kevin R. Thomas

Supervisory Training Series

Listening Skills

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

• Name

• Where you work

• How long you’ve been supervising

• How long you’ve been supervising at Williams

Introductions

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 1

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1) Program Overview2) Listening Skills

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1. Structure of the Program

2. Structure of Each Module

3. Ground Rules

Program Overview

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 2

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Communication & Self-Management

Supervising Individuals

Supervising Teams

Supervising at Williams

• Listening Skills• Giving Effective Feedback• Delegating Skills• Diversity & Inclusion

• Hiring & Onboarding• Leaves, Absences & Accommodations• Performance Development• Dealing with Performance Problems• Developing Employees

• Building Effective Teams• Resolving Conflict

• Professional Ethics

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Structure of Each Module

Program Overview

Skills Practice or Case Study discussion

Overview: “Least you

need to know”

Who to callMaterials to

add to binder

Course web page with

all materials

Pre-work questions

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 3

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

• Confidentiality

• Participation

• Listening

• Judgement free zone

Ground Rules

Program Overview

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1) Program Overview2) Listening Skills

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 4

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Why is listening important for supervisors?

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 5

Why is Listening Important for Supervisors?

-NOTES-

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 6

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

What behaviors indicate good listening?

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 7

What Behaviors Indicate Good Listening?

-NOTES-

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 8

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1. The Listening Container

2. Listening Behaviors

– Minimal encouragements– Open-ended questions– Mirroring statements– Empathy questions

Listening Skills

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1. The Listening Container

2. Listening Behaviors

– Minimal encouragements– Open-ended questions– Mirroring statements– Empathy questions

Listening Skills

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 9

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

• Privacy

• Freedom from Distractions

• Time Limit

• Setting Ground Rules

The Listening Container

Listening Skils

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

• Confidentiality• “I” statements• No name calling or pejorative

language• No interruptions• Volume and gestures moderate• Time outs

Setting Ground Rules

Listening Skills Listening Container

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 10

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1. The Listening Container

2. Listening Behaviors

– Minimal encouragements– Open-ended questions– Mirroring statements– Empathy questions

Listening Skills

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

• Echoing words or phrases

• Verbal cues that you are listening “Oh?”, “Mm hmm”, “Right.” etc.

• “Is there more about that?”

• Silence

Minimal Encouragements

Listening Skills The Listening Stance

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 11

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Minimal Encouragements– your turn

• Pair up. This will be your partner for the whole class.

• Each person think about a real problem you are facing that you can talk about easily with a stranger.

• For the first round, choose who will be the speaker and who will be the listener.

• Speakers, talk about your problem for 2minutes. Listeners, use only minimal encouragements.

• Switch roles.

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1. The Listening Container

2. Listening Behaviors

– Minimal encouragements– Open-ended questions– Mirroring statements– Empathy questions

Listening Skills

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 12

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

• Questions that encourage the speaker to explore the whole landscape of the topic.

• Cannot be answered “yes” or “no”

• Beware of advice posing as a question:“Have you considered doing x?”

• Examples of open-ended questions on next page.

Open Ended Questions

Listening Skills The Listening Stance

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 13

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 14

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

“You know how advice is.You only want it if it agrees with what

you wanted to do anyway.”

— John Steinbeck

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Open-ended questions – your turn

• Speakers, talk about your problem for 3minutes. Listeners, use minimal encouragements and open-ended questions.

• Switch roles.

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 15

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1. The Listening Container

2. Listening Behaviors

– Minimal encouragements– Open-ended questions– Mirroring statements– Empathy questions

Listening Skills

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

• Statements that summarize what the person has said.

• Helps the other person know you are hearing them.

• Follow with “Have I got that right?”

Mirroring Statements

Listening Skills The Listening Stance

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 16

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Watch the video and underline the mirroring statements that you hear.

Mirroring statements: examples

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 17

Mirroring Statements in Action

Mirroring statements are statements that summarize and distill what the listener has heard from the speaker. They help to ensure understanding and provide the speaker with a sense of validation.

Underline the mirroring statements as you see them in the video.

Michelle: So how's it going with your email and phone call triage?

Eric: Not so great. I've been tracking my emails every day, and the average is 150. I don't know how anybody keeps up with that amount of volume.

Michelle: That is a lot of email. Now last week you talked about carving out time at the beginning and the end of each workday for email. How's that going?

Eric: Not so great. I mean, there's just not enough time. I get bogged down trying to figure out which emails are most important.

Michelle: Well, they're not all of equal importance. I think you should choose the top three project priorities and then make your decision from there.

Eric: Okay. I'll give it a try.

Michelle: Oh, I'm sorry. Let's, let's go back. Sounds like you’re seeing the vast ocean of emails and even with the hour of focused attention, you don't know where to start. Is that more accurate?

Eric: Yes, I get very anxious. I'm nervous that I'm going to miss something or that people are going to think I'm slow or that I'm slacking.

Michelle: That's an interesting perspective. Is it true?

Eric: Well, maybe. But actually, I'm the opposite of a slacker.

Michelle: So, what is your expectation about what you should be able to do?

Eric: I should be able to create a system. get it started.

Michelle: Mm-hm.

Eric: And then call it done.

Michelle: That's a great idea. What would it look like?

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 18

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Mirroring statements – your turn

• Same partner• Speakers, talk about your problem for 4

minutes. Listeners, use minimalencouragements, open-ended questions,and mirroring statements.

• Switch roles.

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

1. The Listening Container

2. Listening Behaviors

– Minimal encouragements– Open-ended questions– Mirroring statements– Empathy questions

Listening Skills

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 19

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Empathy questions

Listening Skills The Listening Stance

• Sharing your guess about what thespeaker may be feeling:“Based on what I’m hearing, I’mguessing you’re really angry aboutthis.”

• Demonstrates concern and respectfor the person’s feelings.

• Follow with: “Am I right about that?”• Don’t be afraid to ask “How are you

feeling?”• With sincerity, validate feelings:

“That makes sense to me.”

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

• Postive feelings arise whenare needs are fulfilled

• Negative feelings arisewhen needs are not fulfilled

• Listeners can help speakersidentify their needs and theassociated emotions

The Link Between Emotions and Needs

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 20

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 21

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Empathy Questions – your turn

• Same partner• Speakers, talk about your problem for 4

minutes. Listeners, use minimalencouragements, open-ended questions,mirroring statements, and empathicquestions.

• Switch roles.

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

“Anything that’s human is mentionable. And what’s mentionable is much

more manageable.”

— Fred Rogers

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 22

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Listening Skills for Supervisors page 23

Supervisory Training Series: Communication & Self ManagementKevin R.Thomas, Manager,Training & Development · Office of Human Resources · kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu · 413-597-3542

Links coming via email:

Contact Kevin Thomas at 413-597-3542or email kevin.r.thomas@williams.edu

Supervisory Training Series

Communication & Self-Management

Questions?

• Course page link to all course materials• Program evaluation link, feedback welcome

Listening Skills for Supervisors page 24