logical fallacies or how to be a sophisticated liar and get away with it. [satire] (satire)

Logical Fallacies

or

How to be a sophisticated liar and get away with it.

[Satire](Satire)

"No one has proven that Bigfoot exists by concrete evidence; thus, he does not exist.“

There is no evidence to prove that Global Warming is caused by humans; therefore, it doesn’t exist.”

See: http://www.fallacyfiles.org/ignorant.html

Ad Ignorantium

Drawing a conclusion on the Basis of Ignorance; the absence of

evidence proves only the absence of evidence.

“No one has proven that the Loch Ness Monster doesn't exist, so it

does.”

"Millions of Americans have cast their votes at the box office. Semi-Pro is clearly the best

movie of the year! A million ‘thumbs up!’"

Bandwagon

Jump on board. Everyone else believes it, so you should too. The

“popularity” fallacy.

“Everyone in the cul-de-sac but us has seal-coated their driveways.

We’d better start getting estimates."

“The Internet should not be used in the classroom because Senator

Barrack Obama’s study on Internet Dependency proves that overusing

computers leads to computer-addiction.”

Appeal to Authority

Appeal to Authority

Expert sources are not always experts in the subject they are

speaking to.

“According to Clay Aiken, troops should not be deployed in Iraq.”

“If students fail to pass the new standardized tests, employers will refuse to hire them, and

before you know it, our nation’s streets will be filled with angry,

unemployed youth.”

Appeal to Fear(Scare tactics)

Implies or states a threat to the audience; usually identified by

blatant exaggeration.“If you vote for me, you won’t

have to worry about the safety of your children. Unlike my opponent, I am tough on

criminals.”

“If I don't pass this course, I'll miss the Dean’s List and my folks will

kick me out of the house.”

Appeal to Pity

Attempts to win sympathy by overstating pathetic emotion; shifts

responsibility to those who shouldn’t have it.

“Don’t blame me for robbing convenience stores. It’s society’s fault. Or my parents’. Whatever.”

“Naming a sports team the Chiefs is no more offensive than naming a team the Senators, as in Ottawa’s hockey team. You don't see any senators being

offended, do you?”

False Analogy

Compares two or more things that are not naturally similar, but

suggests that they share certain characteristics

“Alcoholism is like acne; the right treatment makes them both go

away.”

"We are told that to discriminate against people is bad, but if we

don't discriminate between good and bad singers, we’ll all end up

liking Celine Dionne.”

Equivocation

Shifts the meaning of a term within a single argument.

“No one can doubt that miracles reported in the Bible actually

happened. Miracles are still part of our lives. Just look around, and you'll see the miracles of modern science, such as cell phones and I-Pods.”

“No wonder your alternator went out on your car this morning. Dang it, Wally, I told you to forward that chain email.”

“As soon as Clinton entered office, the economy improved.”

False Cause(Coincidence)

Claims a false cause/effect relationship based purely on time.

“As soon as Bush entered office, the economy improved."

"If you believe in gun control, then you obviously don't believe in protecting your children from

violence."

“Either you’re with us or you’re against us.”

False Dilemma(Either/Or Choice)

Presents only two alternatives; over-simplifies reality.

“Either you eat your meat, or you can't have any pudding. How can you have any pudding if you don't

eat your meat?”

“Yesterday I saw a woman back her mini-van into a parking

meter which proves that suburban women can't drive.”

Hasty Generalization

Generalizes from a sample too small or unrepresentative of the targeted group. Often creates stereotypes.”“A guy stumbled down the street

during the St. Patrick's Day Parade. He must be Irish."

“The bleeding heart Massachusetts Liberals want to babysit unmotivated people with all their special programs, but

that isn't the government's job.”

Straw Man

Creates and then attacks a distorted version of the opponent's argument.

“Environmentalists don’t care about animals; all they care about is

putting loggers out of business.”

“Your stance on the predator-control clearly shows that you

favor Anarchism over protecting little children from coyotes, and I

don’t think we need Anarchists making public policy.”

Personal Attack

Attacks the person arguing rather than the argument itself.

“The fact that the judge didn't vote to uphold the First Amendment

proves that he is a Neo-Conservative activist.”

“Every law-abiding citizen agrees that Minnesota ought to

pass a seat belt law.”

Poisoning the Well

Sneakily implies an intimidating assertion that will discourage open

discussion.

“Reasonable people agree that instituting random search and

seizures are necessary to prevent terrorism.”

And finally:

“Putting metal detectors in Minnesota high schools is the

first step toward a state of Martial Law.”

Slippery Slope

Claims an action should be avoided because it will lead to a domino

effect of negative results.

“Censoring the Internet will lead to the complete abolishment of the First

Amendment . . . oh yeah, and to a state of Martial Law!”