Annual ReportFrom Ken Danford, Executive Director

LIBERATEDLEARNERSA

NN

UA

L R

EP

OR

T SUMMER20

14

Hello! It’s almost time to start a new year, but I am still basking in the delight of the last one. This summer has been filled with conferences: we attended a national alternative education conference in New York and then hosted our own annual conference in which we shared our model with others interested in starting similar programs. I confess that all of this constant talk about North Star leaves me inspired, not drained. I just don’t seem to run out of energy for this task. Thank you for being part of an environment that is so ideal for me, the staff, and for our members and alumni.

At these conferences, skeptics hear our glowing descriptions of the program and then ask, “What’s the downside? It sounds too perfect. There must be a catch!” We tell them, “Actually, there’s no catch. People have to want this lifestyle. Not everyone is interested in this approach (including my own children). The hardest part is finances. There is no public money for such a project. We just have to figure it out through fees, fundraising, and creativity.” North Star has come a long way in dealing with these challenges and offering a viable model for the world.

In terms of making this lifestyle appealing, North Star has become an impressive force. Our dedicated core staff of eight and our superb extended staff of volunteers provided an incredible assortment of opportunities this past year. Among the highlights were a wide-ranging set of classes and workshops, an extraordinary set of tutorials, three Variety Shows, a fabulous Theater Production, a service trip to Nicaragua, and an overall level of sheer play and joy rarely seen among teens in an academic environment. We saw dramatic growth among teens confronting their own challenges. At the end of the year, we said good-bye to three teens moving on directly to four-year colleges and several others moving on to other adventures with a healthy sense of self-direction.

Financially, North Star had some ups and downs, leaving us about where we started, which is stable but not secure. We had three spectacular fundraising events involving our Board of Directors and all of you: Valley Gives in December, our Celebration of Self-Directed Learning in April, and the of hosting Circus Smirkus in July. In addition, we benefited from a Whole Foods 5% Day, and we had a lively set of summer camps. Offsetting these gains, we had a slightly smaller membership than anticipated and a larger-than-in-the-past request for fee reductions, totaling over $68,000. All families contributed to the best of their abilities, but the cumulative effect limited our cash flow. Ultimately, I view this situation as an impressive success: North Star’s fundraising and internal creativity averted what would have been a disaster for most non-profits.

We are all working towards a long-term, sustainable North Star. Our Board is constantly brainstorming more fundraising. We have modestly raised the membership fees for next year, while intending to remain inclusive to all interested families.

Our development efforts this year attempt to solve the following riddle: “How can North Star be a model organization for the world while remaining inclusive to all families? How can North Star’s stable but limited financial situation inspire others to take risks in starting similar programs? What will it take to transform North Star into a fully secure organization?”

Privately, I wish for one angel donor to appear and match my enthusiasm for this work, and to stabilize North Star permanently. That sure would make things simple, wouldn’t it? In the meantime, it’s a team effort. All of our gifts of money, time, and energy matter, and collectively we are making a miracle happen.

Thank you!

North Star hosted

Vermont’s International Youth Circus,

Circus Smirkusthis July.

Thank you allfor making

it asmashing success!

Photo by Mauricio Abascal

Dear North Star Friends,

It is my pleasure to introduce the first annual North Star report. This has been a fantastic year for North Star, thanks to a wonderful staff, many volunteers, great kids and parents, a hardworking Board of Directors, and those

who have supported the program through their donations. On behalf of the Board I want to thank everyone involved for making this one of the best years ever for this remarkable program.

One of the highlights of this year was the creation of Liberated Learners, a new organization founded by North Star and the Princeton Learning Cooperative and made up of North Star and North Star-inspired programs. There are now nine of these programs, including North Star and PLC, from Portland, Oregon to Dedham, Massachusetts and Ottawa, Canada. Those of you who attended the Annual Brunch in April got a chance to hear from a couple them.

Liberated Learners will make it possible to spread the North Star model throughout the world so that more and more kids will be able to experience the joy of self-directed learning.

Another important milestone for North Star this year was that, thanks to our friends, we doubled the amount of money raised through contributions last year. Valley Gives, in December of 2013 was a huge success, as was the Brunch that introduced Liberated Learners. In addition, North Star hosted Circus Smirkus at the end of July, and we are excited about the new revenue from this event. Fundraising is essential to North Star’s work. Because North Star has a commitment to being accessible to all families, regardless of their income, membership fees have never been enough to cover costs. The donations we receive from friends and the income from events like Circus Smirkus make it possible for North Star to work with tremendously diverse families.

I hope you enjoy this first annual report, and thanks again for your help.

Sincerely,

Gary BernhardPresidentNorth Star Board of Directors

What you’ll find in our Annual Report:

Infographics from anonymous year-end survey interspersed Letter from the president of the board, Gary Bernhard“Leaving on My Terms,” recent alumna essay “Learning What We Knew,” recent alumna-parent essayThe numbers The breakdown: who makes up our donor baseWhat donors say about why they give Major fundraisers2013-14 Class offerings What about College?Thank you to staff, board, volunteers Ken’s latest blog post: “Talking to teens and parents when school isn’t working”Catherine’s latest blog post: “Philanthropy at North Star” International service trip“Realm of Possibility,” recent alumna essay “What a Gift,” recent alumna-parent essay

LETTER FROM THE PRESIDENT OF THE BOARD

TABLE OF CONTENTS

To really understand why North Star means so much to me, it’s important to know where I came from. Academia has always been a huge part of my life, and kind of expected of me. My family has a lot of highly educated lawyers, judges, teachers, and just a general trend of doing well in school. When I lived on Long Island I was in a program where half of all my classes were entirely in Spanish, and I was in the gifted program on top of that, for three years. When my family moved to Massachusetts I skipped a grade and went into 5th grade at a two-year developmental difference and at least a foot height difference from my classmates. I maintained my A average and didn’t get a grade below B for the next two years, despite being bullied. Then, middle school happened.

You’ll rarely meet a person who says they loved middle school. Some people had it worse than others, but few liked it. I began middle school on the public school track. I wasn’t happy, but everyone said you weren’t supposed to be, so I thought it was normal. Looking back, dispassionate teachers and gossipy classmates were surely some of the most obvious factors in my miserable experience. I put up with awful treatment and dealt with it by retreating into myself. The more attention I drew to myself, the worse off I was. So I cut my hair and wore sweatshirts big enough to hide in. I purposefully failed placement exams for the advanced classes to stop the teasing for being too smart. At such a small school, it didn’t really work well, but that was my thinking. My grades started slipping bit by bit towards the very end of middle school.

In high school I went from doing all my homework to doing as little as possible. My Tourettes manifested freshman year and I started to miss classes and had to leave school early at least once a week. Then sophomore year my anxiety showed up and my depression worsened. Unable to take the pressure from school and the apathetic teachers, I dropped out. I knew about North Star, seeing as it was across the street from both my house and my previous school. Well, I say “about North Star.” What I really mean is, I knew it existed but I had no idea what it was. At my old school, North Star was known as the place the freaks went to school. I was adamant that I couldn’t go there and so my parents homeschooled me themselves. They did the best they could, but it was awful. So I went back to the high school for junior year. Even worse. This time, I dropped out and went to check out North Star, figuring it had to be better than school.

I visited the next day, and felt at home immediately. Within the next few days I was welcomed into the community and made to feel included. I jumped right into several classes (maybe not the ones my parents wanted me to take, but I was happy with them), my anxiety was probably a quarter of what it had been before, and I was jumping out of bed every day to get to North Star. I was excited about learning again. I made friends quickly. I think in my entire year and a half at North Star, I’ve missed no more than two days. One of the days I missed was during my first week, where I was so exhausted from the sleep deprivation that had plagued me at public school that I slept all day.

At North Star, I was able to devote my time to the things that mattered to me. This was made possible through the amazing staff and my own advisor, Catherine Gobron. It made it easier to come to an adult and talk about what my goals were and how to achieve them when I was treated as an equal and not something less than because of my age. There’s a distinct freedom in being treated as a capable being. At North Star, our ideas are considered and treated

like a real proposal if we can back them. Through student initiative, we even organized Pride Prom! A whole prom!

During my time at North Star, I focused on language, to put it broadly. I studied language etymology and evolution briefly on my own. I studied French (which is my preferred language, and I hope to be a translator when I graduate college) and Romanian. Towards the end of the year I brushed up on my Spanish a tiny bit on my own, but overall I was just happy that I

got to study what really makes me happy. Besides my more obvious passions, I was really excited to study psychology and current events, and I discovered a strong love of theatre. It was something I never really considered doing before, but I loved it so much I was in the play this year.

Thinking of the play I’m reminded of the strong bond North Star teens share. Through theatre I think I’ve formed some of the strongest friendships of my life. Through North Star as a whole, I’ve made friends I couldn’t have made in public school where there are such strong age divisions and focus on what type of person you are. I’ve made older friends, younger friends, friends my age but into such different things I never would’ve even had the chance to interact with them. One of the best things about my North Star experience is probably the community. Even if you didn’t talk much to someone there was no animosity and very little conflict happened. We were just friends on a base level, some of us closer than others. I was astonished by the amount of people who said they’d miss me, including people I didn’t get to know as well as I would’ve liked to. It’s just a general

Leaving on My TermsBy Hannah Noblewolf, recent North Star alumna

Hannah in North Star theater production

This isAdriana!

culture of acceptance and a basic appreciation of others.

I’ve had a very eclectic schooling experience, to say the least. If you’d told me that I would drop out of school (not once, but twice!) at any other point in my life, I would’ve called you crazy. It was never part of my plan. It wasn’t the way to get an education. But I was so, so wrong.

Here I am at 17. I’m going to my dream school in the fall, I’ve taken college classes and done well, gotten my GED right after my 16th birthday, ate the SATs for breakfast. I’ve been able to explore my passions. I’ve been able to explore who I am and what I want out of life. My depression and anxiety are almost nonexistent now. And as a pleasant side effect, I have a much better relationship with my parents after all that stress was removed. I’ve grown so much as a

person and have been able to blossom into a version of me more similar to the bubbly and inquisitive child I was before my own personal hell began. I’m still me, but more. North Star allowed me to find that part of me again.

It’s not at all what I expected and I wouldn’t have had it any other way, because in the end I ended up at North Star. And through that, I’ve had the honor of meeting and getting to know some of the most amazing and unusual people I’ve ever known. I’ll miss North Star with all my being and there will always be a part of my heart reserved for this place. But I’m leaving because it’s the right time for me to go. And you know what’s beautiful about that? I’m leaving on my terms. It’s my decision and no one else’s.

My oldest child is heading off to college this fall, in a way very different from what we expected. She is 17 years old, and has always been very smart, very perceptive, and very wise. Her father and I always expected that she’d blow through school, in the usual way, and move on to some top-notch college and from there into her adult life.

But three years ago, she developed physical and verbal tics that embarrassed her, paralyzing anxiety about everything, and crippling depression that put her in the hospital twice. We homeschooled her in the spring of 2012, but, lonely and needing more external structure, she went back to school that fall. Finally, in February of 2013, we were done with school for good. North Star is a program that is across the street from us; we had known about it, and looked at the blue-haired Goth kids with amusement for a few years. We were pretty sure that it was where the kids who couldn’t manage school went; since our kid now fell into this category, we trekked across the street.

Our daughter was instantly on board; her father and I were nervous. These were our concerns: that she would be removing herself from the structure that had worked reasonably well for us, that she would spiral deeper into her depression and be unable to manage her learning, and that she would take weird classes that were not “useful” for the college journey that we believed was only delayed for a bit.

And then, we spoke with the program director, a guy who had graduated from college with me, a guy who had gone to graduate school at an Ivy League institution. What this guy was telling us was mindblowing in its simplicity. One didn’t need to go to high school to be successful. One didn’t need to go to high school to go to college. Perhaps, even, one didn’t need to go to high school to learn anything. The trappings of normalcy that high school offered were useless – and both of us, her parents, realized that we totally knew

that.

But to hear this from an academic peer was fantastic. We were still pretty iffy on how this would all play out; the whole “letting go of the path we knew worked” thing was a big struggle for us. We realized only then just how wedded we were to the Expected Scheme of Things, and how those underlying expectations were hindering our ability to make this opportunity available to our kid, who really needed another way.

In letting go of those expectations for her, though, an amazing thing happened – we were able to free ourselves from the feeling that we had to produce a certain kind of young adult in a specific way. We

were really able to understand, appreciate, and applaud the person our daughter was becoming, completely on her own terms.

In an awesome display of maturity and self-knowledge, with support from her advisors at North Star, she got herself a math tutor, blew her SATs out of the water, found a wonderful college that spoke to her, charmed the Dean of Admissions, and obtained an early decision place at Marlboro College in VT.

Learning What We KnewBy Lisa Wolf, Hannah Noblewolf’s mother and recent alumna parent

Young Hannah

THE NUMBERS

# of Donors in 2013-14

322Dollars raised in 2013-14

$99,540Membership fees collected

$230,000Fee reductions given

$68,207These numbers come from North Star’s internal reports. A CPA will review and adjust these numbers.

THE BREAKDOWN

KEY:

Of the 100% of dollars raised in 2013-2014:

13% of those dollars were donated by alumni parents,

9% were donated by

current parents,

6% were donated by alumni,

3% were donated by the board of directors,

2% were donated by staff,

and 67% were donated by *friends of North Star.

*Friends of North Star, our largest donor group, encompasses friends

and family of staff members, extended family of members and

alumni, volunteers, people replicating our model in other

programs, local business sponsors, entrepreneurs and more!

WHAT DONORS SAY ABOUT WHY THEY GIVE

Parents say...“...because I am moved by the way North Star offers life-changing freedom and support to teens regardless of their ability to pay the full fee.”

“Because of North Star our family enjoys the rewards of empowered, healthy, engaged children who love their lives and enjoy learning”

“[North Star] helped save my daughter's life - literally. Will always be indebted. ... Has been an inspiration for me to change my own life … That is, to create a home that is a laboratory for discovering all of our dreams, to let go of the voices that say ‘it has to be done this way, or it is a failure’.”

Educators say...“I was [a current member’s] preschool teacher and I know that North Star let her be a part of the community when she was a little too young to actually be there. You followed your heart instead of the rules and I love that you were there for her.”

“We need as many modalities for learning as possible to help all of us become better human beings.”

Alumni say...“To improve education choice in this country. ...I'd like for my child to have more opportunities than I had. What you all are doing matters so much.”

“Now I am a college professor and I know that my year at North Star gave me the confidence and courage to pursue my own educational choices.”

Friends say...“[It is so great that North Star is] Making those opportunities available to young people at such a crucial juncture in their own lives (and in fact in the life of the world). You are doing something very very important.”

“A home for the most unique and outside the box types to blossom...which includes supporting and coaching parents of these kids to know how to give them the space for them to find their own way.”

MAJOR FUNDRAISERS

2nd Annual Valley Gives

10th Annual Celebration of Self-Directed Learning

On December 12, 2013 North Star participated in a community-wide 24-hour on-line celebration of generosity called Valley Gives. During Valley Gives Day, western Massachusetts nonprofits collaborate with the goal of getting thousands of Valley residents to support their favorite nonprofits. By participating, donors help non-profits become eligible for special prizes totaling as much as $225,000. Since 2012, Valley Gives has raised over $3 million for our community. 346 friends of North Star donated $25,000, plus we won $1,200 in prize money, totaling $26,200!

This year North Star hosted its 10th Annual Celebration of Self-Directed Learning. Over 200 people attended the brunch at Greenfield Community College on April 6, 2014. Our theme this year was “Leading a Movement: North Star is inspiring programs across North America.” Our Self-Directed Learning Award was presented to Princeton Learning Cooperative, the first program to replicate the North Star model, for its promotion of the values and practices of self-directed learning. Thanks to the generosity of our donors we raised $32,000 at this event.

Circus SmirkusFor the very first time, North Star hosted Vermont’s International Youth Circus, Circus Smirkus on July 29th and 30th at the Tri-County Fairgrounds in Northampton. We raised $30,000 at this event: about half from advertisers and the other half from ticket sales of four sold-out shows. It was a smashing success of an event and we plan to do it again next year! Many thanks to all who made this event possible, in particular board members: Gary Bernhard, Jodi Cutler, Josiah Litant, Laura Porter, Loran Saito, and Sue Surner. And big thanks to our sponsors: Bueno Y Sano, Florence Savings Bank, Whole Foods, Northampton Cooperative Bank, Hilltown Families, Northeast Center for Youth and Families, and especially River Valley Market.

2013-2014 CLASS OFFERINGSGED Math: For folks who want to prepare for the GED or just work on skills in a low-stress, fun and supportive environment.

Writing Workshop: Workshop for developing all sorts of writing and learning to offer helpful critiques to others.

History of Rock & Roll: This course builds on last year’s History of American Music, taking a more in-depth look at rock music from the mid-1950s to the present day.

Social Issues: Current topics in the news and special guests.

Ethics: Analyze present-day issues as they relate to ethics and ethical decision-making. We discuss, debate, and explore what it means to live ethical lives.

Eastern Philosophy: Explore time-honored methods for calming the mind and awakening insight. Do Something: What are you fired up about? What are you concerned or worried about in our world? What would you like to change? We’ll research them and learn about our topics, strategize, plan, and take action to make your world a better place.

Math: From counting to calculus, for beginners to advanced; no pressure, just exploration of all things math.

Psychology: Why do individuals behave as they do? This class covers the main names and studies of an Intro Psychology Course.

Comics Class: In this class, students learn some very basic art techniques to be applied to character creation. Through discussion of comic books and other sequential media, we will try to figure out what makes a comic good and memorable, as well as how comic books affect greater social consciousness. We will be collaborating to create and draw characters that are multifaceted and diverse.

Romper Room: Toddler-teen play time. Sing, play, and romp with little ones.

Wildlife Ecology: Explores the lives of animals near and far. We dissect their relationship with each other, the environment, and us.

Urban Sketchers: Draw from life, indoors and out. Bring a sketchbook and pencil if you can.

Sessions: Music production and recording.

Music Improv: Explore music making by picking up the instrument and playing. Some theory and experience is good, but no prior knowledge is required. Just a willingness to tune in and play.

Harm and Punishment: When one person breaks a rule or harms another person, how should we respond -- in a family, in a school, in a society? Does punishment work effectively with children? With criminals? What are other options? We’ll explore these questions through reading short pieces, watching video clips, and, most of all, through group discussion.

Images: Photography and video have many points of overlap. Investigate commonalities between these forms, including lighting, equipment, publishing.

Growing Up Female: A just-for-girls discussion group about what it’s like to grow up female in our culture. This is a teen-initiated group with a supportive adult co-facilitator.

Growing Up Male: A safe and supportive peer group for exploring issues relevant to the experience of growing up as a male-identified human.

Essays and Ideas: This is a non-fiction writing and discussion group with a couple of related purposes. The primary goal is to significantly improve your writing skills. We will do short writing exercises in class, and work on some essays in between class.

Garden Group: Plant seeds! Grow things! Work together!

North Star Band: Join North Star’s Rock Band, which will perform as a group at least three times per year. Commitment to attend every week will be required.

FOOD: FOOD class addresses the epidemic in bad nutrition. In class we identify ingredients, prepare and eat.

Chorus: Choose songs and sing them together.

Gaming: Teen organized group gaming.

Ethics Lab: How do we know what’s right and what’s wrong? Where do we get these ideas? Can we change them? Why would we want to? In this class, we will analyze present-day issues as they relate to ethics and ethical decision-making.

Also: Rebellions, Heresies and Dreams; Dungeons and Dragons; Your Multiple Intelligences; Yoga; Real Life Puzzles; Poetry Workshop; Evolution; and Film Theory.

WHAT ABOUT COLLEGE?The following is a partial list of the colleges and institutions which our members have attended:

Greenfield Community CollegeHolyoke Community CollegeSpringfield Technical CollegeWarren Wilson CollegeLandmark CollegeBerkshire Community CollegeUniversity of MassachusettsMassachusetts Institute of TechnologyHallmark PhotographyArt Institute of BostonBennington CollegeUConn Graduate SchoolHampshire CollegeColorado State UniversityAudubon Expedition Institute

Smith CollegeMt. Holyoke CollegeLehigh CollegeManhattan School of MusicAmherst CollegeBrown UniversityColumbia UniversityReed CollegeWhitman CollegeEarlham CollegeWorcester Polytechnic InstituteGuilford CollegeUniversity of Alaska, AnchorageUniversity of VermontMaine College of ArtLyme Academy College of Fine ArtsMass College of Liberal !ArtsRhode Island School of DesignUniversity of California, Los AngelesUMass Medical School At Northeastern UniversitySt. John's College, New Mexico

St. Lawrence UniversityIndiana UniversityLesley CollegeMiddle Tennessee State UniversityMontserrat College of ArtThe New School, New York CityClark UniversityUniversity of California at BerkeleyLe Cordon Bleu, ParisMacalester CollegeEmerson CollegeIthaca CollegeMitchell CollegeSan Francisco Circus CenterThe NE Center for Circus ArtsKripalu Yoga CenterSage Mtn. Herbal ApprenticeshipJapanese Buddhist MonasteryU.S. MarinesU.S. Coast GuardPeace Corps

Core StaffMauricio AbascalKen DanfordCatherine GobronEllen MorbyrneSusannah ShefferJohn SpragueJosh WachtelLauren Wolk

Board of DirectorsLinda AronsonGary BernhardJodi Lyn CutlerSydne DidierJosiah LitantJohn McDermottLaura PorterJack RosenblumLoran SaitoSue Surner

Volunteers & Interns

Linda AronsonLena BeckensteinLily BellTerry BlanchardChristal BoutteDaniel BrewerSteven BrewerMark CaputoRoss Carson-GronerMelanie DanaJennifer DorfieldLaura FattafusoVladimir FerdmanBrenna GalloHope GobronTom GoldscheiderKyle HanlonLianna Hart

Paul JackmauhChris JankeAlexandra LacyMegan LieffFelix LufkinJonathan MartinTucker MarvinAbraham McClurgSihem MellahNini MelvinJonah MeyerVictoria NabaggalaJH NobleHannah NoblewolfMaggie NortonEmma OpitzKaris PadhamAndrew PasqualeJustin PetersonRenata PienkawaTristan Pitzi

Ashley ReardonAndrew RobertsChristopher RoseGrayce RoseLaura RossMeg Rumsey-LasersohnVanessa SerottaEric ShabuninCasey ShanahanMorgana SmithAvery Snow-CobbRachel SpitzNia SteinerJanet StreetRachel TelushkinTed WachtelAnnie WestphalBrooke WilsonJason WoofendenYingxin Zeng

THANK YOU

KEN’S LATEST BLOG POST

David and his mother have driven more than an hour to visit North Star. As I show them around the building, he is quiet. When we sit down in the office, I take up my notes from the phone call I had with his mother, and say, “So, you are 15, just finishing 9th grade in public school?”

He says, cautiously, “Well, actually, I didn’t finish this year.” I pause, wondering how he feels about this situation, and not sure if he isn’t a bit embarrassed and vulnerable to tell that to a stranger in a school-like office setting.

I just say, “Oh, what happened?”

“Well, the work just seemed so pointless and boring. I stopped doing it. And then I just gave up.”

I heard a sense of defeat in that report, so I blurted out, “Congratulations! I bet stopping going to school was probably the wisest thing you could have done.”

A tiny hint of a smile appeared at the corners of his mouth, and he looked at me to see if I was joking. His mother exclaimed, “Well, you haven’t heard that one before!”

An hour-and-a-half conversation ensued. Sure, David has struggled with depression, but he’s not seeing a therapist and he’s not on any medications. Since he stopped going to school in May, he’s actually feeling happy. He has one major activity, martial arts (in which he is pursuing his black belt), and he has one active intellectual pursuit, psychology. His mother, a social worker, confirms that David is much more alert and pleasant and thoughtful about his life since he stopped going to school in May.

In fact, his mother goes on to share the long version of David’s dismal school career, saying, “Every time a teacher told me,

‘I’m going to make sure I get through to your son,’ I knew we were in trouble. I always wanted to tell them, ‘Stop trying so hard.’”

I laughed out loud. “You’ve come to the right place for that!” Seriously, North Star staff pay careful attention to our members, and one of our primary concerns is to build relationships with teens. However, we do not try to “fix” or “change” teens, especially those who have no desire to be “fixed” or “changed.”

After I heard their full story, I began my description of North Star by asserting, “Everything I’m about to tell you and offer

you are things you can do either with or without North Star. You do not have to join us to embrace a self-directed lifestyle that will work. Join us only if driving more than an hour a couple of times per week is going to improve your life.”

I then went on to describe our program: our classes, our one-on-one meetings for personal interests and tutoring, our advisories for each member, and our goal for helping each member construct a routine and a life they want. I explained that he could go to college if and when he wanted, starting right now. I told him that obtaining a GED would satisfy every bureaucratic need he might encounter without a traditional high school diploma.

In short, I repeated over and over again in as many variations as I could manage to say: “Your choice to not complete 9th grade has cost you nothing, and it never will. You just seized a 3-year-and-two-month head start on

your life. You are a risk-taker, and you are entirely correct in assessing the value of staying in school.”

Who else tells a semi-depressed kid who gave up on school prior to 9th grade finals that he has done the right thing for himself?

Most of the teens I meet at North Star are not depressed. In each meeting, I find a different way to convey the truth that “School is optional” that is relevant to their experience. I don’t know for sure that David will join North Star, and if he doesn’t, his mother will never pay us a dime. But watching his body posture and eye contact change during that meeting, hearing his mother’s support and appreciation for our message, witnessing her tears, and shaking his hand on the way out the door all made it a day well spent.

Talking to Teens And Parents when School Isn’t WorkingBy Ken Danford, Executive Director

CATHERINE’S LATEST BLOG POST

Supporting a teen as they figure out their life is a beautiful thing. Teens at North Star have the time, the space, and the support to figure out who they are, who they want to become, and how they’re going to get there.

Our program creates the framework for this process of self-discovery, and is made possible through member fees.

For some teens, this is enough. Guidance through an advisor, substantial support from home, a community at North Star, and they are ready to state their dreams, make plans, and get to it.

These teens who hit the ground running are inspirational. They are also a minority.

The vast majority of teens who come to North Star are just beginning to consider what their dreams and talents are. Before coming to North Star they either didn’t have the time to consider what they liked to do, or they knew it didn’t matter because they wouldn’t be able to do it.

Most of our teens need a lot of time to explore. Discovering how you learn best and developing the confidence to try is a process that requires patience, security, trust, and exposure to a wide range of interesting and positive choices.

Member fees don’t cover this. North Star relies on philanthropy in order to provide the in-depth, customized opportunities that are often crucial to a student’s experience.

For example, our donors make it possible for us to offer high quality arts experiences that are often the key to igniting the spark of possibility.

Our theater, music, and photography programs are intensive and demanding while also being accessible and flexible. North Star has adult alumni living and working as musicians and artists who never considered these pursuits before coming to North Star.

The structure of our program creates an atmosphere of safety and comfort from which students are able to launch

into new challenges. Our donors make possible the high quality, inviting arts instruction that our students become inspired to choose.

In addition, North Star hosts a great number of volunteers who bring an impressive amount of diversity and passion to our calendar. This year North Star hosted more than 70 volunteers between September and May. These generous individuals donate their time, but they can’t donate the time it takes to train and coordinate them all, and to match them

with the right students. This, too, is made possible through donations.

A scaled down version of North Star could exist without any philanthropy, but we could not reach as many teens as we do, and we could not help ignite as many individual passions. The depth, the quality, and the diversity of what we offer our teens relies heavily on the generosity of our supporters.

On behalf of the staff, our alumni, our current students, and our entire community, THANK YOU for contributing to the well being and growth of our teen members, and by extension, to the well being and growth of the community of the future.

Philanthropy at North StarBy Catherine Gobron, Program Director

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what

the world needs is people who have come alive.”-Howard Thurman

INTERNATIONAL SERVICE TRIP

It was an honor to be invited back to Omotepe, Nicaragua this past March. It was my seventh international service trip with North Star teens, and the first time I returned to the same place.

Every trip has been special and successful, and I could have easily and happily returned to any one of them. But the world is a big place and I’m eager to see all of it. So each year I had been choosing a new destination.

Then in 2013 we went to Omotepe, Nicargaua and were invited into the homes and lives of the local people in a way that was new and special for me. After we returned home I spent the months thinking about the children we got to know and the connections we made. When it was time to plan this year’s trip, it was an easy decision.

Mauricio Abascal, my co-leader, felt the same way, as did nine of the teens who travelled with us in 2013. Four more teens joined the crew and in March of 2014 we returned to Omotepe with a group of 15 for another powerful experience.

This year we built some simple playgrounds for the school and rural community of Sacremento, which, as it turns out, creates insta-joy among children-- both my teens and the locals. We built structures mostly from rope and old tires and then played and played along with the kids. So fun!

Our North Star teens had a blast, and they also worked hard. We didn’t do anything particularly complicated, but none of it was easy. The heat, the food, the constant work and constant walking- it’s a lot to handle. Each of us faced our own challenging moments, and worked through them.

We offered as much as we could: our time, our dollars, our labor. And we came home with more: humility, respect, deeper understanding, gratitude, empowerment, connection.

Plans are already underway to return in 2015. I’m working on a connection with a veterinary school on the mainland to organize a spay and neuter adventure for the many local dogs. Stay tuned!

-Catherine Gobron, Program Director

In first grade I had to switch from a Montessori school in Albany, NY to a regular public school in Scotia, NY. It was a bit of a change because I went from doing things at my own pace to doing first grade reading work. I got along with my fellow students and teachers perfectly fine though, so it wasn’t too much of a bother. But over time I got bored with the work and I wasn’t getting on as well with my classmates. Everything was frustrating and by fifth grade I was fed up with school and angry with nearly everything.

I hoped it would get better in middle school. I carried on with the few friends I’d kept in elementary school to Scotia Glenville Middle School and for the first few months it was great. I’d been placed in a homeroom with a few of my friends and a great teacher. Much like in first grade, I figured it wouldn’t be so bad. The work was average and I procrastinated on my long-term projects. I made vague attempts to do all my work but eventually I fell flat. I started not completing my homework and getting lunch detentions because of that. I got zeros on more than one occasion and was often pulled aside by my teachers to talk about what was going on. They would tell me I was a bright student but I was just wasting my potential. Sometimes they would ask if there was anything they could do but I never asked for help. I wasn’t struggling with the work itself but with the amount of effort I was being forced to put into work I didn’t care about.

Throughout my time in school I got angrier and less tolerant of those around me, which carried over to my home life as well. The strained relationship I had with my mom was only getting worse with all the added pressure. My mother was so worried for my well being that she started seeking alternatives before I’d even thought of the possibility of other options.

A family friend told her about North Star and when she linked me to the North Star website I was beyond skeptical. It looked too good to be true, a bit out of the realm of possibility. I shot the idea down multiple times. My mom didn’t give up though. Over the next few months we checked out a fairly local Waldorf school and a free school, neither of which was what we were looking for. I wasn’t willing to put too much stock in a “great self-directed program in Massachusetts” when I had a perfectly terrible middle school I was willing to suffer in just blocks away. But a few months in to my seventh grade year I didn’t see myself making it anywhere and I gave in, agreeing to go to one of the North Star open houses.

One tense two-hour drive later, I was sitting upstairs in the North Star library listening to Ken’s speech about how North Star came to be. I remained unconvinced but after two of the current teen members spoke about their experience, I had to admit I was curious.

After a short tour of the building we were led into the common room. That’s where I think everything truly changed.

Seeing groups of teenagers relaxed and happy, actually talking and not staring judgmentally at one another, was mind blowing. I wasn’t even standing there a whole minute before I was approached by the two members who later became my first friends there, and informed that there was a class dedicated to watching and discussing episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

I knew right in that moment this was a place I wouldn’t mind spending my time.

During my first two years of North Star I only went two days a week. My mom would drive me over on Sunday or Wednesday nights so I could stay with a friend, and then she would pick me up two days later. On the days I wasn’t in Massachusetts I was in Scotia, helping out at a local bead and jewelry shop and continuing my commitment to a rowing team.

It eventually became a bit of a hassle to drive back and forth so much. But after much deliberation, instead of making me leave North Star, my amazing mother took early retirement and moved us both to Northampton, Massachusetts. Things only got better from there as I was closer to my friends and closer to North Star. Four days a week of classes I loved and free time to discover and pursue interest in things I’d never dreamed of doing before. I couldn’t find a downside anywhere. I still can’t.

I took quite a few classes: sex-ed, music history, social issues, basic botany/herbalism. I made a larger commitment to theatre and band, which I’ve been committed to for the last few years. I was in four productions with the North Star Players and those shows were some of the most fun things I’ve ever done. During those shows, I made plenty of friends whom I hope to keep in touch with even after leaving North Star; they mean the world to me. I took the Images course for a year or two, which turned into a one-on-one tutorial. I even had a brief tutorial for electronic music.

My main interests right now are photography and theatre, both of which I’m planning to continue with in the coming years. I hope to become a concert and events photographer for a while some day. Though I’m not completely sure how I’m going to go about doing it, I feel stable enough in my self-directedness to figure out these plans in my own time!

My five years at North Star have been the best five years of my life. I have no idea where I’d be or who I’d have become without it. The thought of not going back in the fall is honestly a bit hard to wrap my head around. I still feel somewhat unprepared for life but I know that it’ll be okay. I know I can visit North Star if I need help or advice or just want to say hi. I know that the staff will still be there to guide me if I truly need them. I know that I will be carrying the joy that North Star gave me forever in my heart.

Realm of PossibilityBy Sylvia Simmons, recent North Star alumna

When Sylvia and I moved from the small city of Albany, NY to the Village of Scotia, NY, I was told that the school district was one of the best in the area. We moved at the end of Sylvia’s first grade year and when she left her school in Albany, her teacher told me that she had already completed the second grade curriculum and to try to get her placed in second grade for the rest of that school year so that she could start third grade the following fall. This “one of the best” school district turned out to be very rigid and rule bound. They wouldn’t even consider her former teacher’s recommendation. Consequently, Sylvia was placed into a first grade classroom and was bored in school from then on.

Being a person of optimistic bias, Sylvia made the best of the situation by getting involved in other activities such as sports, girl scouts, a special honors program, and music. But the heavy load of redundant homework and the rigid adherence to the rules of the school system wore on us both.

By middle school, Sylvia had clearly had enough. She had become increasingly bored in school and found the homework to be redundant and nonsensical (I had to agree). She had become resistant to following the rules and stopped doing the homework. This was about the time that my sweet child was labeled a bully and a troublemaker by the school administration. Certainly, Sylvia is strong minded and does not hesitate to state her opinions and is especially stubborn in the face of unfairness. But she was no bully or troublemaker. So, of course, she was also labeled defiant, and this middle school was all about compliance. The whole point of the three years spent in middle school seemed to be to teach kids how to follow rules. I watched my daughter become increasingly angry, sullen, and very, very unhappy.

This was unacceptable to me. There was no way I could continue to allow my child to suffer and become that “bad” kid they were making her out to be. I began desperately searching for alternative schools. I dragged Sylvia to visit every other school I could find in the Albany, NY area. We visited private schools, other public schools nearby, a Waldorf School, and a free school. Not one of these schools offered what I knew Sylvia needed: a chance to heal from the damage already done by the public school system in Scotia, and opportunities to really learn and grow as a person. I knew I couldn’t homeschool her by myself. I was working full

time and didn’t want to leave her by herself at home all day every day. The homeschooling cooperative I found in the area was basically a fundamentalist Christian group, which didn’t suit us. I also knew that our relationship would not allow me to become her teacher in the formal sense. She needed more than I could provide by myself.

Finally, a dear friend living in Northampton suggested that I look into North Star as an alternative. I loved what I saw on the website. I knew immediately that this would be a place where Sylvia could thrive. Even though North Star is a two-hour drive away from our home, I knew it was that important to get her there. It took me several months to talk Sylvia into attending an open house at North Star with me, but I will never forget that Friday in February, 2010 when we finally got there. At that Open House Sylvia and I listened and watched. We heard Ken talk about the North Star program’s principles and philosophy (I was already convinced) and we heard the stories that several of the teen members shared. Sylvia was not yet convinced, but was invited to stay for the afternoon to get a feel for the place. She agreed to stay when she was welcomed in the Common Room by several North Star members. I left her there that afternoon and when I came back later to pick her up, the decision was made. Sylvia never went to school again. What a gift.

North Star staff and members took my angry, defiant, and somewhat obnoxious child in with open arms and a loving acceptance that allowed Sylvia to thrive. Within the structuring atmosphere of mutual respect, Sylvia began to relax, drop her tough, protective attitude, and show up as her true self. She began to trust that she wouldn’t be punished for showing herself: her strong personality, her intellect, her talent, her questioning and challenging mind, and her sense of fairness. She was encouraged in all of this. She was encouraged to be kind, to be respectful, and to keep an open mind. She made good friends and has kept them. She was encouraged to expand her thinking, to appreciate her body, and to develop her talents. Countless opportunities to do all of these things were offered to Sylvia throughout her five years at North Star and she took advantage of many of them. Sylvia attended classes on psychology, current events, public speaking, nutrition and food, photography, film, music, and theater arts. The staff and volunteers at North Star took loving care to make this learning possible for my daughter. I believe they have made anything possible for Sylvia, because she now knows that she can learn to do whatever she decides she wants to do. Sylvia is an accomplished young woman and is happy. And I am grateful.

What a GiftBy Margaret Lloyd, Sylvia Simmons’ mother and recent alumna parent

Portraits of Sylviataken at

North Starby staff member

Mauricio Abascal

A project of Learning Alternatives, Inc.

RETURN SERVICE REQUESTED