anx i e t y · 2019. 11. 7. · high anx i e t y getting up early for “zero period.” five hours...

H I G H

a n x I e t y

GettInG up early for “zero perIod.” fIve Hours of sleep. ap CalCulus, eCon, BrIt lIt, and CHInese. WHat It takes to Compete In atlanta’s top-sCorInG puBlIC sCHool—WHere

nearly 300 kIds Have 4.0 Gpas. By paIGe WIllIams pHotoGrapHy By audra melton

“adults think we’re drunk, atheistic, sexual drug users.”Jimmy kilpatrick, a Wal-ton senior, takes four ap classes, plays in orchestra, participates in model u.n., and manages a Cold stone Creamery in marietta.

86 Atl AntA j a n u a r y 2 O O 7 Atl AntA j a n u a r y 2 O O 7 87

“It’s just kind of a given—you have to do well in school.” lisa Williams has a 3.9 Gpa, is vice president of the senior class, catches for the fast-pitch softball team, and plays travel ball in the off-season.

PArt 1: Advanced Placement

atthestartoflastsemester,Mr.Fleenor’sadvancedPlacementliteraturestudentsatWaltonHighSchoolarrangedtheirdesksinacircletodiscussthatfamousshortstorywheretheguyturnsintoacockroach.noonedebatedhowgrossitwouldbetoturnintoaroachor,like,dude,whatwouldyoudoifyouturnedintoabugand,like,gotsteppedonbyyourmom orsomething?

“Societyitselfforcestruehumanityintoadarkplace,that’swhatthisstoryisabout,”saidafloppy-hairedboyinaPinkFloydT-shirt.another,inshortsandtie-dyewithablanketoverhislegsandamugofcoffeeonhisdesk,said,“Howcanhebeacceptedashuman?Hisonlychoiceistodie.”anotherstudentbroughtupthe“fallibilityoftheremovalofemotions,”andsomeoneelsesaidsomethingabouttheappleasanallegoryforChrist.Fromoutsidethecircle,Mr.Fleenor,whoisthisyear’sTeacheroftheyearandgenerallyconsideredthebest-dressedfacultymember,said,“Good.Whatcoloristheapple?”

“red.”“andwhatdoesthatsymbolize?”“Blood,death,”saidagirlsittingbeneathpostersof

2PacandBiggieSmalls.apairofstudents,oneinanationalHonorSociety

shirt,wenttothedry-eraseboardandexplainedaplotdiagramallthewayuptotheding-dongdismissal.aseveryoneshuffledout,agirlapproachedMr.Fleenor.

“So?”hesaid.“IreallylikePrinceton,”shesaid,“andIreallylike

Stanford.”Later,inMr.Levy’saPcalculusclass,theprojector

showed3x4+35√x3+2x=7onapull-downscreen.Mr.Levy,wholooksmorelikeacatalogmodelthantheste-reotypicalmathteacher,hadwiredhiscalculatortotheprojectorandtohisdesktopDell.Thestudentswatchedhimworkproblemsinrealtime,followingalongwithcalculatorsthatlookedlikesomethingnaSamightgiveyouonyourfirstdayofwork.ThenMr.Levyhandedouttipsheetsonfindingnumericalderivatives,thepagespre-punchedtoslipeasilyintoabinder.

“youguysrememberyoursumofcubes,right?”heasked.

“Ofcourse,”astudentsaid.Mr.LevyfireduphisTI-89calculator,evenslicker

thanthestudents’TI-83s,andstartedpokingatit.an

answerappearedonthescreen.“OhmyGod!”someonesaid.“noway!”“Lovely.”“areyouallowedtousethatontheaPtest?”one

girlasked.“Becauseifthat’sthecase,I’llgorightnowandbuyone.”

at3p.m.,inanotherwingofthebuilding,Cath-erineMallandawheeledacartofletter-jacketW’sintotheCommons,whichsomeschoolscalltheCafeteria.Mallanda—tall,33,withachichaircut—herselfattend-edWalton.ShereturnedtoteachshortlyaftergraduatingfromGeorgiaTechwithadegreeinnuclearengineering.recently,shebecameafull-timeassistantprincipal,withanofficeandawalkie-talkie.StudentscallherMallanda.

PTSamothershadfestoonedtableswithheliumballoonsandcenterpiecesofred,white,andblue,thebattledressoftheWaltonraiders.OnepresidedoveraBlueBellicecreamcart.afewparentswaitedwithcamerasbutscurriedoffafterMallandaexplainedthattherewouldbenophotoopbecausetherewouldbenolettermanceremonyper se,justtheprincipal’scongratu-lations,andFudgeBars.

Thebellbroughtstudentswearingflip-flops,shorts,bulgingbackpacks,CitizensofHumanityjeans,Dooney&Bourkebags,andT-shirtsbrandedadidas,TheBea-tles,ThinLizzy,DukeLacrosse,Clemson,andTheSaltyDogCafe.Thesewereathletesandbandkidsanddramakidsandchoruskids,withthecommondistinctionthatnonelookedespeciallygeekyandeachhadmaintained,foronesemesterorlonger,aperfect4.0GPa,therebyletteringnotintennisortrack,butinacademics.andtherewerenearly 300 of them—more4.0sthansomeschoolshaveseniors.agirlwithaFrenchmanicureandlong,perfectlystraight,perfectlyglossyhairshruggedandsaid,“It’sjustareallyoverachievingplace.”

Bythatpoint,Iwascompletelystressedout.InMrs.Gao’saPChineseclass,thestudentshadpracti-


“College is so hard to get into now.” kaitlin fulkerson, a senior, has a 4.4 Gpa, is a member of Beta Club and national Honor society, and works a part-time job.

callyfinishedawholeconversationaboutnationalitiesinthetimeittookmetodrawtheword“who.”InMr.Levy’sclass,40calculatorswouldnothavehelpedme.IunderstoodtheBobDylanposteronthewallandthatwasaboutit.Iwaswriting“mathproblem”inmynotesbutspellingit“probablem,”sofriedwasmybrainafterspendingonlyahalf-dayatWalton,whichisknown,amongotherthings,forhavingthehighestSaTscoresinmetroatlantaandsecond-highestinGeorgia.Ifeltabitofhopeuponhearingthecomprehensiblesentence,“Wheredoesthedecimalpointgo?”ButthenMr.Levysaid,“Thisisstillpre-calculus.Wehaven’tevengottentothecalculusyet.”

atopstudentof20yearsagocouldnotholdtheTI-83ofa

topstudenttoday,andthatisthetruth.StudentafterWaltonstudent toldmethattheirmomsanddadssay,“IfIhadtotrygettingintoEmorytoday—forgetit!”nopopulationofamericanteenagers—especiallyatschoolslikeWalton—haseverworkedharder.Studentsareskippinglunchandcom-ingtoschoolanhourearly,at7:15,“zeroperiod,”beforedawn,tosqueezeinextraclasses.SometakeonfiveorsixaPclassespersemester,plussportsand/orchamberchoirand/orclubaffiliationsand/orpart-timejobs,toprovetheyhaveachievedtheholygrailof“well-roundedness”andthattheycanhandlethekindofpressuresthey’llfaceincollege.“It’ssointensehere,tomethisisharderthancollege,”saidCourtLevy,theaPcalculusteacher.“Inever,incollege,hadsixorsevenclassesaday,whereeachclassiscollegelevel.andtheyhavemountainsofworkforeachclass.”

Thepressure!They’recompetingforthehighestpossibleGPaandclassranking,andforanincreasinglyelusiveplaceatthecollegeoftheir(andtheirparents’)dreams.They’restackingtheirsemesterswithaPs,thetoughestcoursesoffered,becauseaPsgildatranscriptandbecauseiftheypassthestandardizedtestinthatsubject,they’llneverhavetounpackasinglepencilinthatparticularcourseincollege.PassfourorfiveaPsand—well,they’repracticallyenteringcollegeassopho-mores.Whichmeanstheycangettogradschoolorasteadypaycheckquicker,andmaybesaveafewdollars.ThemoreaPsastudentaces,thehigherthepossibleGPa,whichalsolooksgoodonatranscript.a4.0isn’tconsideredgoodenoughanymore;itisn’teventhehigh-estpossibleGPAanymore.WithenoughaPsitispos-

sible(excruciating,butpossible)tograduatewith—areyoureadyforthis?—nearlya4.7.StoriesaboutaruralGeorgiavaledictorianwithalowly3.6canblowaWaltonkid’smind.atWalton,youcanhavea4.0andnotevenrankinthetop100.

“ToaWaltonstudent,aC’snotagoodgrade,”saidGregFleenor,theaPliteratureteacher.“actually,withallourhighdemands,aCwouldberemarkablehere.Butthesestudentsgotoalllengths.They’llstayuptill3or4inthemorning,everymorning.andthey’reexpect-ed,atthesametime,tobeexcellentinanysport,inanyextracurricularactivity,andtodocommunityhours.Butbeingpushedeverymoment,it’salmostexhilaratingforthem.Becausethey’resupposedtobethebest:They’regoingtogetintothebestcolleges,andthey’regoingtogooutandmakethemostmoney.That’sthemindset.”

a2004Mediamarksurveyfoundthatmorethanhalfofamericanteenagersfeel“stressedoutallofthetimeorsometimes,”mostlybecauseofschoolwork.Studentsreportpressuresfromparents,teachers,peers,coaches,andthemselves.allthebuzzing,conflicting,numbing,demanding,coercingparticlesofourwarp-speedcultureseepintotheteenagepsyche,too—theymust.afterall,thisgenerationofteens—Millennials,asthey’resometimesknown—isgrowingupinanationofterrorismalertsandtoxicspinachandcongressmene-mailingcome-onstoteenagepages,anationwhereamilkmancanwalkintoanamishschool,unpackanarsenal,andexecutechildren.Theirsisanationatwar,thedistantbodycountrising,andnorthKoreaistestingnukes.TeenagersarehumiliatingeachotherinInstantMessageandwebsitewars,reportedlydrivingsometosuicide.amongtheavailablerecreationaloptionsaremarijuana,cocaine,Ecstasy,alcohol,sex,meth,videogamesinwhichyoucanblowvirtualenemies’headsintobloodystumpsandwatchthemtwitchinthecrim-sonsnow,and,atmorethan5,886locations,thebrevehalf-cafftriplegrande140-degreeupside-downcaramelmacchiato,for$4.20,plustax.Teensareexperiencingcredit card debt.TheyaredriftingawayfromevangelicalChristianityandnamingHarryPotter,LouisVuitton,andperfectteethastoolsofSatan.Theirlittlebrothersandsistersare,inpreschool,suddenly,freakishly,atriskforearlypuberty.BetweenSeventeen,Teen Vogue,andCosmoGIRL!,itispossibleforagirltofindherbestfalllook,getgorgeousfast,developamazingone-minuteabs,makeonlinelovework,andacquireasexyhairstyle,plustheperfectjeans,allofwhichmayseemhelpful,buthaveyouevertriedtobeasize2?

andyet,amidthegeeseandgoldenrodofthelastremainingcountrysideineasternCobbCounty,Waltonstudentsliveinaschooldistrictwheretheaveragehomesellsfor$479,849.Theydrivenicercarsthantheirteachers.Theywillvisitmorecountriesbythetimetheygraduatethanmostamericansseeinalifetime.TheiraverageSaTscore—1705onthenewscaleof2400—trouncesthestateandnationalaveragesof1477

and1518,respectively.astaggering95percentofthemgoontofour-yearcolleges,includingtheIvies—asta-tisticbefittinganoft-citedU.S. News & World ReportrankingthatlistedWHSasoneofamerica’stophighschools,promptingalotoffamiliestomoveintotheWaltondistrict.asfootballplayersMattTowleandChaseThomasweresayingtheotherday,Waltonhasmadetheplayoffsthepastfiveorsixyears,andthemoretheywin,themoreeveryoneexpectsthemtowin.“It’sbecomingbiggerandbiggereachyear,”Chasesaid.“Theexpectationsarehigher.”

raidersrule!raiderscanstayupstudyingtill1o’clockinthemorningandstillmakethestateplayoffsandhavetimetovolunteerwiththeelderly.Theykeepschool-issuedagendasinwhichtheyhavebeentrainedsincemiddleschoolorearliertowrite,oftenincheerfulcolor-codedinks,AP Microeconomics TestorBaby-sitorRehearsalsorBasketball PracticeorManicure for Bitsy’s Bat Mitzvah!!!raidershavetheirpickof32aPcourses,pluszoology,plusbankingandfinance,pluspsychology,plusthatChinesecourseImentioned(“It’sdifferent;itlooksgoodonyourtranscript,”afresh-manwhoisalsofluentinHebrewtoldme)—choicesotherhighschoolstudentsdon’tencounteruntilcollege.Forextracurriculars,theycanconsideralltheregularclubs,likeFrenchClubandModelu.n.,butalsothejazzappreciationClub,ortheInvestmentClub,ortheFuturePhysiciansClub.Thecurriculum,thewell-fundedfacilitiesandboosterprograms,theexpectationsofexcellence,thegorgeousathleticfields,thehandsanitiz-ersinthehallways,and,tobefrank,thepredominantwhiteness,makeWaltonseemlesslikeapublicschoolthanaprivateacademyandagoldendoortogreatness.TheworstdisciplineproblemLindarathjen(Englishchair,22-yearveteran)everhadwasakidwhostoodupandyelled,“jesusChrist,youaresoannoying!”whenshenaggedhimforforgettinghistextbookforthemillionthtime.

So,really,what’stostressabout?Itisn’tasifWaltonkidsareknifingeachotherinclass,orduckinggang-bangersonthewaytoschool,orturningtricksforrent,orbeingwokenbypolicesirenseverysixminutes,orbailingmamaoutofjail(again).Someofatlanta’steen-agersaren’ttakingaPLatinbecausethey’retoobusytryingtofigureouthowto,like,buyfood.

yetthatisthatandthisisthis.Thefasttrack—Excel!Win!Beperfect!Orelse!(you’renobodyunlesssome-bodyworshipsyou,baby!)—can,initsownway,doseriousdamage.affluentsuburbanhighschoolersnotonlysmokemore,drinkmore,andusemoreharddrugs

thantypicalhighschoolers—theydosomorethanacomparisongroupofinner-citykids,Psychology Today reportedin2005.Oneinfourorfiveaffluentteensisclinicallydepressed,andaffluentteenshavehigherratesofdepression-relatedanxietythananyothersocioeco-nomicgroupofyoungpeopleinthiscountry,theresearchshowed.Privilegedsuburbangirlsarethreetimesmorelikelythantheirpeerstobeclinicallydepressed.“Inpart,”thereportwenton,“theaffluentkidsarerespond-ingtoachievementpressures.ratesofdepression,anxi-ety,andsubstanceabusewerehighamongthosewhosefamiliesoveremphasizedtheiraccomplishmentsandwhosawachievementfailuresaspersonalfailures.”

MadelineLevineseestheproblemsfirsthand.SheisthelongtimepsychologistwhowroteThe Price of Privilege.Sellingwildlyon theWestCoast,Priceisamongarecentcropofbooksexploringthepotentialconsequencesofadrivenadolescence.Theotherday,ataspeechLevinegaveinCalifornia,whereshelives,amotherreportedthathersuper-achievingchild’scounselorhadsaidsomethinglike:Tocolleges,

kidslikeyouareadimeadozen.“asidefromhowhor-rendousastatementthatistomakeaboutachild—oranyperson—whatitreflectsishowincrediblyintensethepressureistobeoutstandinginsomeway,”Levinetoldme.“Imean,canyouimaginesayingthattoakid?Sowegotintothislongdiscussionabouthowtochangetheculturewhenit’sallaroundyou.andtheansweristhatparentshavegottotakeastepbackandreallydoagut-checkontheirownvalues.Everybodynowknowsofkidswhoreallyareinterribletrouble—rehab,therapeuticboardingschools,whatever.Whathaskeptthisinplaceinaffluentcommunitiesisdenialandtheintenseneedtoalwayslookgood—ourhouseshavetolookgood,ourcarshavetolookgood,ourkidshavetolookgood.”

Shewenton:“yes,we’resupposedtopushourkids.Butaretheysupposedtohaveheadachesandstomach-achesandbeupworkinguntil2inthemorning?no.Itinterfereswiththisotherrangeofskillsthey’resupposedtobedeveloping,likehelpingoutaroundthehouse,cultivatingasenseofself,developinghobbiesandself-controlandfrustrationtolerance,learninghowtotalktotheoppositesex.Cankidsgooutandplayandrunaroundandshoothoops?yeah,aslongastheydon’tfeeltheirwholeliferestsonperformance.Parentshavetounderstandwhythat’ssodamaging.Ifakidfeelshisparents’loveisconditionalonperformance,thatmeanshe’salwaysanxious,alwayswaitingfortheothershoetodrop.youlosecreativitywhenyou’reconstantlyevalu-ated;ifallyourenergyis

affluent suburban high schoolers not only

smoke more, drink more, and use more

hard drugs than typical high schoolers do—they

do so more than inner-city kids.


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goingintopleasingeveryonearoundyou,nothing’shappeninginside ofyou.Thesekidscomeinwithpills,withrazors;theycomeincrying,inallkindsofdisrepair,becauseoftheirparents’disappointment.Thebiggesthammeryouhaveasapar-entisdisappointment.Thebiggestvelvetgloveiswarmth.”

Somehow,inthepast10or15years,analmosturban-legend-likenotionofthe“perfectstudent”startedwaftingthroughthehallwaysofhighschoolamerica.Onpaper,theperfectstudentshowedastel-lartranscriptandtestscores,communityservice,brilliantessays,superbteacherrecommendations—abulletproofresume.andyet,“Toomanystudentswholookgreatonpapertoday...aredepressed,overwhelmedwrecksontheinside,”alexandrarobbins,authorofThe Over-achievers,hassaidininterviews.“ameri-caneducationhasbecomeacorrupt,hypercompetitiveculturewithanarrow,misguidedviewofsuccess.”Inchroniclingthehighanxietyofoverachievinghighschoolers,robbinswroteoftopstudentswhoconfessedstress-relatedproblemswithnausea,stomachaches,headaches,anorexia,bulimia,panicattacks,depres-sion,suicidalthoughts,and,inonecase,adigestivedisorderwhereinagirldidn’tevenallowherself“enoughrelaxationtimetousethebathroom.”asrobbinsputit,theyouthoftoday’sincreasinglygoal-orientedcultureare“alreadytakingonthementalityofdrivenadultsintheworkforce.”

Inane-mailsurveysentthroughPTSaorganizations,Iaskedhundredsofmetroatlantaparentswhosechildrenattendtophighschoolshowstressedouttheirteenagerswere,onascaleofoneto10.Mostparentspresumedtoanswerforthechild.aChambleeHighmom,Lindaalexander,wasamongthosewhodidn’t.“Mydaughtersaidherstresslevelisa9,”shewroteinane-mail.“Itmakesherfeelawfulbecauseshedoeshaveagoodlifeandshouldnotfeelsostressed.”Shesaid,“Today’ssocietygivesmessagestoteensthatnormallifeisnotenough.Theyareshownperfectmodelswithtoo-expensiveclothes.Theyarebombardedwithopportunitiestobuy,buy,buy.They

hearofthesexualescapadesofstars,andevenourleaders.Itisstressfultonotbeperfect,haveeverything,andnothaveasexualrelationship.Lifetodayisfasterandharderthaninmyyouth.”

Inwantingtounderstandthelivesofsuper-achievingteens,IconsideredseveralatlantaschoolsbutchoseWaltonasafocalpointbecauseofitstestscoresandreputation,andbecauseitsstudents,teachers,parents,andtopadministra-tion—PrincipalDr.TomHigginsandassociatePrincipaljudyMcneillinpar-ticular—wereremarkablywelcomingandopentoquestions.Theynevertriedtosetormonitortheagendaorshutdownthedialoguewhenitturnedtouchy,likesomeschoolswould.Someconversationswithstudentstookplaceserendipitously,inthepresenceofaguidancecounselor;teachersencouragedothers,andparentsapprovedallinterviewsinadvance.Thequestionsandconversationsweren’tmeanttoexposeorindictWaltonoranyotherschoolorlifestylebutrathertounderstandwhatsuper-achievingteen-agers’livesarelikeinaneraofunprec-edentedhighstakes.asseniorKaitlinFulkersonputit:“Collegeissohardtogetintorightnow.”

“Somuchmorecompetitive,”saidLisaWilliams,anothersenior.WeweretalkingonemorningjustbeforeHomecoming.

“Somanymorepeopleareeligible,”Kaitlinsaid.“It’snotjustbasedon,like,familywealthanymore.nowthere’ssomanyhighachieversit’scrazy.”Shewenton:“Intheoldendays,like20yearsago,someonelikemeoryouwouldbe,like,outstanding.Butnow,overachievement’sjustcommon.”

Kaitlinhada4.4GPaandwastak-ingaPSpanishliterature,honorsworldliterature,orchestra,aPphysics,aPmicroeconomics,andmultivariablecalcu-lus,whichispost-aPlevelandconsideredWalton’stoughestcourse.SheisalsovicepresidentoftheSpanishHonorSociety,amemberofBetaClubandthenationalHonorSociety,andskipslunchperiodtofulfillherdutiesaspresidentoftheorchestra.Shealsoworkspart-timeatTheHoneyBakedHamCompany.“I’mreallybigintomusic,too,soIdopianocompetitions.youcanwinscholarshipsandstuff,”shesaid.“Thisissonerdy,butIwenttopianocamp—itwasreallyfun.”

“It’sjustkindofagiven,”Lisasaid.“youhavetodowellinschool.”

Orwhat?“you’llhaveahorriblelife,orsome-

thing,”Kaitlinsaid,joking,sortof.“ItakehardclassesbecauseIwant

to,”saidLisa.“Iliketochallengemyself.”Shehada3.9andwastakinghonorseco-nomics,aPcalculus,aPSpanish,Britishliterature,honorsanatomy,andpersonalfitness.SheplayedcatcheronWalton’sfast-pitchsoftballteam,plustravelballintheoff-season.ShebelongstothenationalHonorSocietyandBetaClubandworkspart-timeataboutique.Lisaisalsovicepresidentoftheseniorclass.Shewantedtorunforpresident,butherbestfriend,whoalsowantedtobepresident,didn’tspeaktoherforthreedayswhensheheardLisamightrun.“It’shardtokeepitallbalanced,butafterawhileyougetusedtoit,”Lisasaid.“It’salmostsecondnature,tobestressedoutaboutschool.”

“Ourparents’generation—Idon’tknowwhattheirlifewaslikeinhighschool,butIthinkitwassodifferent,”Kaitlinsaid.“Someofthemdon’treallyunderstandwhywetakeitsomuchmoreseriously.Wehavetotakeitmoreseriously.”

PArt II: Basic Math

Fortyyearsago,joanDid-ionwroteaboutanewsubclassofteenagerscon-veninginSanFranciscoand“callingthemselves‘hippies.’”Thosedriftingdreamerswithneedletracksanddubioushygienespent the longslowhoursoftheiryouthtwirlingtotheGratefulDeadbeneaththeGoldenGateBridge.Thegenerationknownfordrop-pingacidanddroppingoutproducedthepopulationofamericanteenagersnowgraduatingfromhighschoolandheadingforcollegeinrecordnumbers.Theseniorclassof2008–09—some3.2millionstu-dentsnationwide,anestimated77,000ofthemGeorgians—isexpectedtobethelargestinu.S.history.Georgia’spublichighschoolswillgraduateaprojected94,748teenagersastheClassof2018.

Thenation’s3,600collegesanduni-versitiesdon’thaveroomforallthebabyboomers’offspring.“nobeds.nomoney.noresources,”ChristineGibbons,a


Harvardrecruiter,toldmeduringherWaltonvisitinSeptember,whenIasked:Whynotexpand?“Imean,we’dlovetobuildfivemore[residential]houses,butthatspace,thatmoney,thoseyearsofplanning—it’snotthateasy.”Theuniver-sityofGeorgiahasadded1,800freshmanslotsinrecentyears,andwhiletheschoolnowaccepts5,000newstudentseachfall,arecord16,000studentsappliedlastyear.It’sparticularlycompetitivetogetintouGabecausesomanytopstudentswantashotatwinningfulltuitionthroughtheHOPEscholarshiplottery.

youwouldhavetolookhardataschoollikeWaltontofindateenwhomightsay,asonedidinDidion’sessay,“We’rejustgonnaletitallhappen.Every-thing’sinthefuture,youcan’tpre-planit.”Firstofall,aWaltonkidwouldneversay“pre-planthefuture.”Second,ifthere’sanythingthecurrentsuperteenager’slifeisabout,it’splanning.They,andtheirpar-ents,arenothingifnotstrategic.

Guidancecounselors,collegeadmis-sionsofficers,andfamilytherapistsareseeinghypercompetitiveparentsandtheirhypercompetitivekidsspendwhat-evertimeandmoneytheybelieveisneces-sarytosecureanyperceivedadvantage.Levine,theauthor,saidparentspaycon-sultants$10,000topersonallydrivetheirkidsaroundtocollegecampusesforVIPvisits.Otherparentsarepayingprivatecollegecounselors—aburgeoningandsometimesshadyindustry—$2,000to$20,000,ormore,tohandletheadmis-sionsprocess,applicationtoenvelope.SomeparentsareworkingsecondjobsormortgagingthemselveshypertensivejusttoliveintheWaltondistrict,where,asguidancecounseloranneCarlsonputit,“They’rebuildingineverylittlenookandcranny.”Lessthan10yearsago,theaver-agehomesoldfor$266,840;it’snearlyhalfamilliondollarstoday.

StudentsthemselvesspendhoursontheInternetlookingatcolleges;takeonlineSaTpracticetestsandwriteappli-cationessaysaspartoftheirregularhomework; lookforuniquewaystodistinguishtheirresumes(unusualclubsorhumanitarian-aidtrips);andbasi-callybrown-noseteachersforrecom-mendations,which,astheHarvardreptoldWaltonstudents,are“reallyimpor-tant—really,really,reallyimportant.”

jedappelrouth,apopularatlantaSaTtutor,tellsofparentswhoplottheirchild’seducationalpathbeforethechildeventeethes—andwhofeeltheirownlivesareoverwhenthekiddoesn’tgetintothepre-ferredpreschool.WaltonstudentsIspoketotoldmeaboutparents(nottheirown)whovideotapedsoccergamesforcollegescouts—whentheirkidwaseight.

“alotofparentsarejusttooinvolvedwiththeirkids’lives,”saidLauraHaynes,aWaltonseniorwitha4.2GPa,andastandoutontherenownedtennisteam,whichisfilledwithnationallyrankedplayers.“Someparentsneedtotakeastepback,”shesaid,notreferringtoherown.“Idon’tknowwhattheseparentsaregoingtodowhentheirkidgoestocol-legebecausetheirlifeforsolonghasbeenjusttheirkid—gettingtheirkidtoschool,gettingtheirkidintotherightsport,get-tingtheirkidintotherightclubatschool,gettingthemtherightSaTclass.”

Forcolleges,theworstpartoftheselectionprocesscanbedealingwithpar-ents.“Talkwithanyadmissionspersonandthey’lltellyouthey’dmuchrathertalktothestudentthantheparent,”saidnancyMcDuff,vicepresidentofadmis-sionsandenrollmentmanagementattheuniversityofGeorgia.Itusedtobethattheparentswhotooktheirchildren’ssuc-cessesandfailuressoseriously,soperson-ally,weremostlyupper-crust,old-moneytypes(you’veseenthemovies).now,parentsofMillennialsaresohard-corethatsomemetroatlantaschoolshavestartedhostingseminarstoremindthemofthedifferencebetweenhealthyencour-agementandoverbearingobsession.“Wehearlanguagelike,‘WhenwetooktheSaT’—well,‘we’didn’ttaketheSaT,thestudentdid,”McDuffsaid.“Wegetcallsafterrejectionlettersgooutfromparentssaying‘WhatamIgoingtotellmychildwhenhegetshomefromschool?’Well,youmaywanttostartbyexplainingwhyyouopenedhismail.andyoumaynotwanttocrywhenyoutalkaboutthistoyourchild.aslongasthestudentwasdoingtheirbest,pickingthehardcourses,thefamilyshouldbeproud.”

InThe Overachievers,robbinswrotethatpsychologistsbelieveparentsover-involveforseveralreasons.“Becauseitcostsmuchmoretoraiseachildthanitusedto,someparentsmightview

asuccessfulchildasareturnontheirinvestment.Similarly,whenparentspaythousandsofdollarsayeartoaprivateschoolorcollege,theymightexpecttohaveasmuchinputaspossibleontheeducationthey’refunding,”shewrote.“Today’sparentsareoftensuccessfulandexpectnothinglessfor,andfrom,theirchildren.asuccessfulchildreflectsasuc-cessfulparent,thethinkinggoes,andpar-entsbecomeanxiousthatiftheyignoreanyopportunityassoonasitpresentsitself,thechildrenwilllagbehind.”

andso,morestudentsaretakingthegruelingroad,especiallyatschoolslikeWalton.ThatthingKaitlinsaidearlieraboutoverachievementbeingcommon?Basicallytrue.Therehavealwaysbeenoverachievers;it’sjustthatnowtherearesomanymore ofthem.“Gotoanyschoolandyou’llfindthose25to30kidswhoareoutstanding;downatthecore,they’reprettysimilarwhereveryougo,”saidLevy,thecalculusteacher.“ThedifferenceatWaltonisthenext200kids.Here,theyallhaveatleastoneaPifnotmultipleaPs,andthelevelofworkethicandtimemanagementjustblowsmeaway.”

ConsiderLisaWilliams’typicalday.Thealarmgoesoffat6:45a.m.Lisagetsup,putsonhermakeup.Shespendsafewmomentsflat-ironingherhair,whichisnaturallywavy,butthisdoesn’ttakelongbecauselastnight,afterherpost-softballshower,shepre-flat-ironeditinordertosleepafewminuteslonger.Onthispartic-ularday,shethrowsonaraidershoodie,herClarksWallabees,herTiffanysigna-turering,herWaltonclassring,somereddanglyearringssheboughtbecausesheneededsomethingredforWaltonandforuGa,whereshehopestogointhefall,if shecangetin,andsomeCitizensjeansthatareherfavoritebecausetheyare“stretchyandlong.”Ifyoudon’tthinkclothesareimportant,letmetellyou:you’rewrong.youshouldseeeveryonewhentheycomebackfromChristmasbreak.They’reall,“What’dyouget?”and“LookatwhatIgot,”andusuallyit’slikenorthFacejacketsandSevensandrock&republicandLouisVuittons,andthey’dbetternotbecheapoknock-offsfromCanalStreet,either.actually,youcanprobablygetawaywithafakeLouis,buttheDooneysandCoacheshadbetterbereal.Turnalltheimportanttags

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aroundwhereeverybodycanseethem.Doyourselfafavorandkeepsomeoil-blottingpapersinthere,forde-greasingbetweenclasses.

Inthekitchen,Lisa’smotherhasjustpackedlunch:aPublixfried-chickensalad,onebanana,somepretzelsticks,andasnackpackofgrahamcrackerbits.LisadumpsdrySmartStartcerealintoaZiplocandisoutthedoorby5till7.asshebacksherdad’sToyotaSuVoutofthedrive,it’sstilldark.

Sheparksintheseniorlotatschool,which,inanothertwohours,willbefullofHondasandToyotasbutalsoaudis,BMWs,Mercedes,someSaabs,someLexi,abunchofVolvos,abunchofSuVs,andoneHummerH3.ShebundlesallherthingsinherVeraBradleytote(pattern:Citrus),whichis,like,essential.IfyouhavenotsettledonasignaturepatternforyourVeraBradleytotes(thebigoneforspringbreakandsportspractice,themediumoneforsleepovers)pluspurse,wallet,watch-band,andsunglasscase,forgetit.notcarryingaVeraBradleybagagainthisyearislikewearingchunky,beadednecklaces,whichissoover.

Sheheadstothefootballfield,whereseveraldozenotherFellowshipofChristianathletesmembersarewaitingbeneaththeglaringstadiumlights.Itiscoolandsortofmisty.“ugh,”Lisasays.“Myhair’sgoingtocurl.”afewpeopleareeatingfromaboxofdonutsonthetailgateofatruck.Lisasayssheshouldn’t,butshedoes,anditissillyforhertohesitateinthefirstplaceoveronestupidchocolatedonutbecausesheis,like,beautiful,andtall,withagreatfigure.Sheprobablyworriesaboutthissometimes(becausewhatgirldoesn’t?)andatWalton,youhavetobepracticallyasize4—orless—beforesomegirls(andguys)evenbegintothinkyou’reskinnyenough.

at7:13a.m.,everybodyflopsontotheslightlydamptrack,shortskirtsornot,andlistenstoCoachamosleadfromabookcalledGod’s Game Plan andremindthemthatitisperfectlyokaytogoontoanathleticsfieldandknocksomeone’sheadoffinthenameoftheLord.

Byfirstperiod,Britishliterature,Lisa’shairispulledupoffherface.rightaway,Mrs.Harpergoesintofaultysentences.“BritneySpearsgivesbirthandreleasesnewfragrance,”shewritesontheboard.

“What’swrongwiththat?”shesays.Thestudentsthinkforamomentand

onegoes,“Eeew.”“Teenscookandservegrandparents,”

Mrs.Harperwrites,andexplainswhyitisalwaysagoodideatothinkcarefullyaboutclarityandpairings.

TheyresumetheiranalysisofactIofBecket,a1959playbyFrenchplaywrightjeananouilhthatdealswiththefatalconflictbetweenThomasBecket,arch-bishopofCanterbury,andKingHenryIIofEngland,ifyoudidn’tknow.LisashareshercopywithagirlwhohasIzodflip-flopsandtoenailspaintedthecolorofPeptoBismol.

“Lovegetsinthewayofwhat,toBecket?”Mrs.Harperasks.

“Luxury,”someonesays.“Well,helikesnicethings,yes,but

whatdoeslovegetinthewayof?”Theysitthereforaminute.Fromthe

backoftheroomLisasays,“Honor.”“Honor,”Mrs.Harpersays.“Becket

sayshonorisdoingwhatyouhave todotothebestofyourability.Doingwhatyoulovetodotothebestofyourabilityispassion.”

Forhomework,Mrs.HarperassignsactII(27pages),plussomeotherstuff,andtheclassspendsthelastthreeminutestalk-ingaboutthenewjacknicholsonmovieandthefactthatTitaniccameoutwhentheywere,like,8,andhowthisonekidwhodidn’tgetintoBaylor,orsomewhere,“couldalwaysjustgotoOleMiss.”

Inhomeroom,themorningannounce-mentsvideocontainstheregulartidbitsdeliveredbymorning-announcementanchorsintheWaltonHighSchoolnewsbroadcastlab,plusaman-on-the-streetsegmentinwhichtheinterviewerasksrandomstudents,“Doyoubelieveinwomen’ssuffrage?”Halfthepeopleinter-viewedthinkthey’retalkingaboutabusedwomen,whichtheyarenotinfavorof,becausewomenare“thedominantrace.”Somebodyreallysaidthat.Iamnotmak-ingthisup.

InaPcalculus,theclasstakesafive-problemquizthatconsumesthewholeperiod.HereisProblem4:“astreetlightis15feetabovethesidewalk.aman6feettallwalksawayfromthelightattherateof5feetpersecond.Determinetherateatwhichtheman’sshadowislengtheningatthemomentheis20feetfromthebase

ofthelight.”TheminuteLisaturnsinherquiz,shestartsreadingactIIofBecket.

Betweenclasses,intheteeminghall(morethan2,600studentsgotoWalton),Lisalearnsthat,inaboutsevenhours,hersoftballteamwillplayroswell.Thisisgoodnews.They’vebeatenroswellbefore,andtheyneedtobeatthemtonighttoadvancetothestatesectionals,whichleadtothestateplayoffs,whichleadtoastatechampionship,whichtheteamlastwonwaybackinthedarkagesof1998.

Inhonorsecon,Lisaimmediatelysignsontoacomputerandchecksherstocks.Thestudentsareusingreal-timeeducationalsoftwareandafake$100,000starterfundtocompeteforthehighestgains.WhoevermakesthemostmoneywinsanewyorkStockExchangeT-shirt.Lisaisrankedseventh.Herpicksaredownabit,butstrong:BestBuy,DnXGas,Coke,Google,afewothers,includingTarget,whereyoucangetcutejewelry.Sheslipsonheadphonesandworksherwaythrough“yourLaborroleintheEconomy,”andafterastrollthroughpurchasepower,demandcurves,horizontalsummation,andwagerates,shedetermineswhetherafellowcalledMr.Garvincanaffordtohireanassistantduringhisrushperiod.Hecan,ifhepayslessthan$11perhour,whichwouldbeajobnobodyaroundherewould,inamil-lionyears,want.Beforeclassends,Lisachecksherstocksagain.Inlessthananhour,shehasslippedtoeighth.

Forlunch,shegoestothemediacen-ter’sbackroom,whichhousesallthebigcoloredrollsofbulletin-boardpaper,andvideossuchasThe Life of MammalsandMakingUnhappyCustomers Love You.Shepullsoutaprintede-mailfromCoachadams,hersoftballcoachandalsoherBetaBuddy,whichmeanssherunserrandsforhimwhenheneedssome-thing.andrightnowheneeds100whitepaperstars,20orangeones,and20yel-lowones,forhisbulletinboard.Shestartsworkingthedie-cutmachine,threehandpumpsperstar,whomp-whomp-whomp,whomp-whomp-whomp.alibrariancomesbyandtellshertokeepthebladedownbetweencutsbecauseotherwiseshemightgetseriously injured.Lisaisaskilledandexperiencedwhomper,butsheispoliteandsaysokay.

“yesterdayIhadtobuymyselfaCoke

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towakeup,”shesays,aproposofcon-stantlybeingtired.“Idon’tknowwhatwaswrongwithme.”Whomp-whomp-whomp.Whomp-whomp-whomp.“MathandSpanisharemyhardestclassesthisyear.Ijustdon’thavethemotivationwhenIgethometositthereandstudy,afterI’vebeenatschoolalldayandsoftballpracticeforhours.”

Within45minutesshehascut150stars.Shestopslongenoughforlunch,thentakesthestarstoCoachadams’room.“you’vegottobekidding,”shesayswhensheseesthebulletinboard.Shehascutfive-pointstars;Coachwantedsix-pointstars.Hehadsuggestedthatsheswingbyhisroombeforeschoolandmakesureshehadtherightshape,butshehadn’thadtime.“IguessI’llhavetocomeinearlytomorrowtodothem,”shesays.

InaPSpanishthereisasubstitute,andinhonorsanatomytheysketchsomebones,andinpersonalfitnesstheyrunlaps,andinbetweenallthatLisafinishesSpanish-testcorrectionsandherBritLitgrammar.By4,sheisdressedoutforsoftball.

HaveyoueverseenWalton’sfast-pitchsoftballfield?Listen,itisbeautiful.Thediamonddirtseemsalittlericher,thegrassalittlegreener.Behindrightfieldstandsafieldhousethesizeofanairplanehangar,andit’sallforthegirls’fast-pitchteam.Thefast-pitchBoosterClubpaidabout$85,000foritsotheplayerswouldn’thavetokeepdressingoutinthatwoodenhutbehindtheconcessionstand.Ifyouwanttoknowspecificallywhopaidforit,youcanreadallaboutitonabigsignonthehomedugout,whichlistscontribu-torsbynameanddollaramount,from$5,000+ondown.nowisagoodtimetopointoutthatschoolsystemsdon’tallo-catemoremoneytoschoolsinwealthiercommunities,butinthosecommunities,parentstendtopadBoosterClubsfromtheirpersonalbankaccounts;you’remorelikelytoseeniceruniforms,fields,andfacilitiesatschoolslikeWaltonthanindistrictswherefamiliesarelessinvolvedandhavelessdisposableincome.

Lisaplayscatcher.Shebatscleanupandthrowslasers.roswellgivestheraidersatoughtimeatfirst.Theirpitcher,astockyblondeinaglitteringblackhead-band,hasaconvolutedwindupanddeliv-ersafearsomechangeup.Theraidersstruggleforhits,muchlessruns.Lisafires


oneparticularlynicethrowtosecondonasteal,buttheinfieldermissestherunner.Lisadoesn’treacttothisoranyotherneg-ativeturn;shesimplyresumeshercrouch.Shebelievessportshelpherdealwiththepressuresofschoolandlife.Ifyoucankeepyourcoolwithaclutchrunnersprintinghomeandabulletcomingfromcenterfield,youcanfigureouttheclutchconjugationofpast-perfect“sufrir.”any-way,Waltonwins4–1.Lisapeelsoffherfacemaskandshinguardsandmitt.Itisjustbefore8p.m.Shehasnotstoppedmovingsince6:45a.m.andshehastwoteststomorrow,plustherestofactII,plusotherhomework.Sheforcesherselftobedat11p.m.“Inhealthclass,theytellyouwhenyou’reateenageryouneedbetweeneightand10hoursofsleep,”shetellsherfriendLauraHaynesoneday,towhichLaurasays,“Iget,like,10hoursintwodays.”

Lisawasright:researchshowsteenagershaveahardtimegoingtosleepbefore11p.m.yetneedanaverageof9.25hoursofsleeppernight,meaningit’sdifficultforthemtogettobedatmidnightandmakeittoschoolby8:20,muchless7:20.“researchhaslinkedinsufficientsleeptodepressionandotherhealthissues,lowgrades,disciplin-aryproblems,poorconcentration,andstrainedrelationshipswithfamilyandfriends,”accordingtoThe Overachievers.Forstudentsheavilyinvolvedinschoolandcommunityactivities,theirjobs,andotherresponsibilities,sleepdeprivationcancausenegativemoods,decreasedschoolperformance,increasedlikelihoodtotrystimulants,andahigherriskofaccidentsanddeath,thebookgoesontosay,quot-inganationalSleepFoundationstudy.Stress-baseddepressionis“oftenbasedonthepressuretosucceedandtoperformwellinthecollegeadmissionsprocess,”thebookconcludes,andstudentsdon’tdisagree.“Peoplecangetreallydownonthemselveswhentheydon’tsucceed,”saidLauraHaynes,theWaltonsenior.“Iftheyputsomucheffortintojustonethingandtheydon’tsucceed,theyfeellikeit’stheendoftheworld.Theydon’tknowhowtodealwithitwhentheyfail.andthat’sreallydangerous,especiallyforteenagers.”


Waltonstudentshavebeenhospital-izedforeatingdisordersandsenthomeforarestaftercryinguncontrollablyattesttime—everytime.“OnestudentlastyearwastakingallaPclasses,andshegottoapointwheresheliterallycouldn’tstopshaking,”ateachertoldme.“Shehadcompletelyshutdown.Shecouldn’tthinkanymore.I’vehadthreestudentsdothat.Theirbrainsbecomeoverloaded.andpersonallyIcanrelatefromateach-ingstandpoint.WhenIfirststartedhere,Ihadanxietythatwouldmanifestphysi-cally—rashes.Thatyear,Ididn’tcometoschoolnineMondays.”Thesesymptoms,especiallytheeatingdisordersanorexiaandbulimia,usuallysuggestperfection-ism,anotherteachersaid.“Thatgoeshandinhand.”

Todealwithpressure,alotofstudentsturntosports,andfriends,andtheirchurches,butjustbecauseyouhavea4.4doesn’tmeanyoudon’tgotoragersorkeepastash.Maybeyougotoragersorkeepastashbecauseyouhavea4.4,toescapeyourgreatbigbrainandTheFutureforawhile.Kidscometoschoolhigh.Kidsgetdrunkeveryday,alone.Kidshoardtheirlunchmoneyanduseittobuyweed.Kidsgotocounseling.Kidstakeotherkids’adderallandritalin(attentionDeficitDisordermedications)orover-the-countercaffeinepillstostayfocused,tostayawake.“Everyonelooksdownonpeoplewhosmokecigarettes,butthere’speoplewhosmokeweedallthetime,”onegirlwassayingtheotherday.

“OnetimeIsawsomeonesnortingcocaineinthebathroom,offthefloor,”saidherfriend.“Shecutitwithacreditcard.”

“MymomwaspickingmeupacoupleofFridaysagoandtheseguyscameout-sideasmymompulledup,andtheyweredoingadrugdeal,”saidthefirst.“Onewassaying,‘I’vegotthismanygramsandyouoweme200bucks.’”

“Themoneyishere,sopeoplecanaffordtobuydrugs.”

“alotofpeoplehavehardfamilystuff,likestress,anddoittokeepevery-thingofftheirmind.Theydoittoescape,orbecausetheycan.”

“Orbecausetheycan’t,becauseit’sillegal,”saidanother.“Theydoittoberebellious.”

Morethan2,000adolescentscommitsuicideeveryyearintheu.S.,butithashap-


penedblessedlyseldomaroundhere.noonecanforgeteighthgrade,though.Waltonkidsstillbringitupfromtimetotime.agirleveryoneknewhungherselfwithabeltinherownclosettwoweeksbeforeher14thbirthday.Shehadbeenuplateonthecomputer,supposedlyhavingsomesortofongoingIMspatwithgirlsfromschool.at2:30,herdadtoldhertogotobed.at3:30,heholleredupstairsandtoldhertoturnoffthemusic.Thenhewenttosleep.

Thenextmorningwhenshedidn’tcomedown,hewenttoherbedroomandfoundthedoorlocked.Hejimmieditopenwithacoathanger,andfoundher.nonoteoranything,justheryearbookopenonthebed,twoboys’photoshigh-lightedinblue.“you’retoolate,”hetoldthedetectiveswhentheyarrived.“There’snothingyoucando.”

PArt III: Personal Essay

justoutofcuriosity,whatwouldhappenifwedidn’tworksohard?Ifwedidn’tcaresomuch?Ifwedidn’tbuildtheperfectresumeandacetheSaTandgetintoStanfordandlandthekillerjobandmarrytheperfectman/womanandliveintheperfecthouseandplaygolf/tennis/whateverattheperfectclubandraisetheperfectchildrenanddie...well,perfect?andwithallofourhair?

Whatwouldhappenifwecouldtake,like,homeec?Learnhowtocooksome-thingthatdoesn’trequireamicrowave?Whatwouldhappenifwecouldcomehomefromschoolandjustgoforawalk,orplayHalo 2untiloureyeballsexplode,orwatchthewholeentireexistenceofLost?

DidyouseethatletterinThe New York Timestheotherday,fromthathighschoolgirlinCharlotte?(yesweseetheTimes,andTheWall Street Journal,whichwereadforaPecon.)“Theintensepres-sureinnearlyeveryschoolacrossamericatobecomeasuccessiswearingusdown,”shewrote.“Colleges,parents,teachers,strangers—allwantmorefromusthanwecangive.a17-year-oldshouldnothavetospendaweekinthehospitalforexhaus-tion.Studentsshouldn’thavetodragthemselvesthrougheachandeveryschoolweekon28hoursofsleeportakeahand-fulofadviltogetthroughsoccerpractice

orcalculusclass.Itmaynotseemlikeit,butwe’retired.”

Everythingdoesn’thavetobeales-sonorlecture.akidcan’tjuststrikeoutanymoreandgetonwithhislife.yes,weknowtokeepoureyeontheball,you’vetoldus4milliontimes.Headdownonthegolfswing—weknow.Soweslip.Wefor-get.We’renotgonnago,like,robbanksbecauseweshankafewTitleistsoffintotheChattahoochee.

Sometimeswegetsomuchpressurefromsomanyangleswegetdizzy.Wejugglesomanythingsalldayeverydayitalmostseemssillytocomehomeandhaveyounagustodoourhomework.Weknowwehavehomework;we’retheoneswholuggedithomelikepackmules.Diditeveroccurtoyouthatwhatyouandtheteacherscallprocrastinationisjustourwayoftakingtwosecondsto,like,think?Someofusneedpushing,butthere’ssuchathingaspushingtoohard.“Idon’tlikeitwhenteachersassumeeveryonewillleaveittillthelastminute,”LauraHayneswassayingtheotherday.“I’mlike,‘That’snottrue.’Idon’tlikeitwhentheymakegener-alizationsaboutus.”

andjimmyKilpatrick,anothersenior,wassaying,“Wewerejuststudying‘TheMetamorphosis,’whichisaboutthesepa-rationofgroupswhowon’tcommunicate.Ourproblem—oneofourproblems—withgrownupsisthat,becauseofhowthemediaportraysus,adultsthinkwe’redrunk,atheistic,sexualdrugusers.andbecauseofthat,alotofteenagersdon’trespectadults.andIthinkthat’sincreasing,thatsortofdisillusionmentandanger.”

Weknowalot’sontheline.nobodyknowsthatbetterthanwedo.Buteverynowandthenyoucouldjustmaybebackoff.Likesports.Weknowyoucouldhaveplayedcollegeballanddidn’t—sodealwithit.Whydowehavetofulfillyourdreams?Butwait,ourdreamsareyourdreams.aren’tthey?Or,no.Holdon.We’reconfused.

arewelivinguptoourpotential,oryours?

Weknowwe’llthankyou10yearsfromnowwhenwe’vemasteredparamet-ricequationsandhaveacornerofficeand401(k).Weknowyouwantagoodlifeforus,maybeabetterlifethanyouhadgrow-ingup.noteveryprivilegedpersongrewupprivileged,wegetthat.There’salot

142 Atl AntA j a n u a r y 2 O O 7

ofmoneyaroundhere—newmoney,wehear—andthataloneispressure.nothingisgoodenoughanymore.Therearepeo-pleintheWaltondistrictbuying$800,000housesandtearing them down tobuild$2 million houses.Weknowpeoplesqueez-ingtheirfamiliesintowhatevertheycanafford—acondo,oranapartment,iftheycanevenfindone—justsotheirkidscangotoWalton.Waltonmaybeapublicschool,butmoney ishowyougetin.

Money—money!“Ilovemoney,”MattTowle,asenior,saidtheotherdaywhensomeoneaskedwhyhewantstostudybusinessincollege.“Iwanttohave alotofmoney.Iwanttodeal withmoney,”hesaid,joking,sortof.“Whatdoyoulovesomuchaboutmoney?”someoneasked.

“Thetexture,”saidhisfriendChaseThomas.

“Thecolors,”Mattsaid.“I don’tknow,Ijustlikehavingit.Ilikethefeel-ingof—”

“Stackingit,”saidtheirfriendryanMurphy.

“Countingit,”Chasesaid.“Obviouslymoneyiswhatmakesthe

worldgoround,”Mattsaid.ryansaid,“Ithoughtitwaslove?”ButthenMattgoes,“Success,tome,is

doingwhatyoulovetodotothebestofyourcapabilities.Idon’tthinksuccessisbasedoffmoney,aslongasyou’rehappy.Mymom,she’samusicteacheratSopeCreekElementary.Sheobviouslydoesn’tgetpaidalot,butshe’sbeenverysuccessful.”

Still,we’dhavetobecrazynottoadmitthatmoneyputsabuzzonthings,achieves things.Likepersonalcoaches,privatetutors.WaltonisthefirsthighschoolinGeorgiatobuyprotrainerTonyVillani’sfancyXPEspeedandagilitytrain-ingprogramforfootball—apro-levelpro-gram—notcheap!andlet’snotforgettheschooltripstoPrague,Paris,Spain.andfamilyvacations—Portugal,Barbados,Ireland,Mexico,Germany,Switzerland,Southafrica,Greece,Turkey,aruba,austria,andMonaco—andthat’sjusttwo students.“youcan’tdenythatwehavemoreopportunitiesthanalotofotherpeoplebecausewecomefromaffluentfamilies,”saidDerrickKemph,asenior.“Butatthesametime,”saidLillyZhong,anothersenior,“it’sbecauseyourparentsworkedhardwhentheywereyourage.Theywenttogoodcollegessotheycould

establishthatforyou.”Lillyhada4.6andwastakingsixaPclasses.Everyonethinksshehasalockonsalutatorian.

“We’retryingtogetintogoodcol-legesandgetthegoodjobssothatwecanestablishthisstyleofhighlivingforourchildren,andforourselves,”shesaid.“Imeanthecold,hardfactisthatwithmoremoney,youcandomorethings.”

andwe’reexpectedtodomore.Lillysaysyoucan’tevenbevaledictorianwith-outfeelingthepressuretogotoHarvardorsomewhere.“Ifyoudon’tgotoareallygoodcollege,everybodywillbelike,what?Ifyou’reoneofthestandardoverachiev-ers,everybodyexpectsyoutogotoagoodcollege.It’ssomethingthat’sbeeningrainedinyousincechildhood.”andjustbecausewehavemoneydoesn’tmeanit’sneveranissue—howtopayforcollege.asLillyputit:“Thethingaboutfinancialaid—ifyou’rereallypoor,yougettonsofhelp.Butifyou’relikeinthemiddleoftheincline,you’renotrichenoughtopayforit,you’renotpoorenoughtogetmoneytogo.”

Lately,everyone’sobsessedwithbrand-nameschools.EventheHarvardrepsaidit:“Inthepastfiveor10years,there’sbeenmuchmoreemphasisplacedoncer-tainschoolsinthecountry—‘IfIdon’tgetin,Ican’tbesuccessful.’Whichisabso-lutelynottrue.”

Ifshe’sright,there’snoneedforyoutocallupouraPstatisticsteacherandscreamathimaboutthatB-minus.Every-oneshouldbemorelikeDerrick’sparents,orjimmy’s.Whentheygottohighschool,theirparentsbasicallysaid,“Everythingyoudofromthispointisonyou.”andthoseguyskickass.Becausetheywantto.Becausetheirparentstrustthemto.Becausetheirparentswon’tfeellikebigfailuresiftheirkiddoesn’tgetintoPrinc-eton.aB-minusisn’tgoingtokeepusoutofPrinceton.andifitdoes,sowhat?Wedon’tevenlikePrinceton.Havewemen-tionedthat?

FyI,wedon’tlikephysics,either.youknowwhatwelike?art.Miró’ssculp-tures?Thatstuffrocks.

Butdon’tpanic;wewon’tbecomesculptors.We’llneverhaveahouselikethisifwebecomesculptors.Sowe’llgoaheadandgotoGeorgiaTechandmajorinchemicalengineeringlikewetalkedabout,andjustsculptinourfreetime.That’llwork.Won’tit?j

anx i e t y · 2019. 11. 7. · high anx i e t y getting up early for “zero period.” five hours...

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