Are You Kidding Me?Parents as Partners

In the PSE Experience

Are You Kidding Me?Parents as Partners

In the PSE Experience

Brooke White, Director - Student Development & Support

Beth Oakley, Director - Educational Development Centre

Brooke White, Director - Student Development & Support

Beth Oakley, Director - Educational Development Centre

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• What has changed in the relationship between university students and their parents?

• What has changed in the relationship between university students and their parents?

Relationship changesRelationship changes

• Technology - instant and constant communication

• Prolonged period of adolescents • Parents and their students welcome the

increased level of involvement and communication

• Technology - instant and constant communication

• Prolonged period of adolescents • Parents and their students welcome the

increased level of involvement and communication

Story sharingStory sharing

• Groups of 4-5• Discuss a unique

circumstance that your university experienced with a “helicopter parent”

• How did you resolve it?

• Groups of 4-5• Discuss a unique

circumstance that your university experienced with a “helicopter parent”

• How did you resolve it?

Survey says……Survey says……• National Survey of College Parent

Experiences (2006)

• High level of communication

• College Parents of America Survey• 74% of current college parents communicate at

least 2-3 times per week while they are at college/university

• 34% contact on a daily basis• 90% use cell phones• 58% use email frequently

• National Survey of College Parent Experiences (2006)

• High level of communication

• College Parents of America Survey• 74% of current college parents communicate at

least 2-3 times per week while they are at college/university

• 34% contact on a daily basis• 90% use cell phones• 58% use email frequently

College Parents of America Survey

College Parents of America Survey

• 29% instant messaging• 7% regular mail• 90% attended parent orientation• 75% visit campus at least once or twice a

semester• 17% visit once a month or more

• 29% instant messaging• 7% regular mail• 90% attended parent orientation• 75% visit campus at least once or twice a

semester• 17% visit once a month or more

Parent & student contact

Parent & student contact

• 72% of respondents agree: • “I feel that my child’s college/university

includes parents in the school community”

• 72% of respondents agree: • “I feel that my child’s college/university

includes parents in the school community”

How should universities respond?

How should universities respond?

• Embrace rather than push away• Look for the positives of having them involved • Let go of telling them to “let go”• Accept that the consumer attitude is here to

stay• Forward thinking universities can channel the

involvement positively and productively

• Embrace rather than push away• Look for the positives of having them involved • Let go of telling them to “let go”• Accept that the consumer attitude is here to

stay• Forward thinking universities can channel the

involvement positively and productively

Parent involvement -questions of concernParent involvement -questions of concern

• Academics - 34%• Finances - 24%• Career planning - 12%• Health and Safety - 12%

• College Parents of America Survey (2006)

• Academics - 34%• Finances - 24%• Career planning - 12%• Health and Safety - 12%

• College Parents of America Survey (2006)

Students’ most requested advice or

assistance from parents

Students’ most requested advice or

assistance from parents

• Finances - 35%• Academics - 19%• Health & Safety - 5%

• Finances - 35%• Academics - 19%• Health & Safety - 5%

Parents contacting universities

Parents contacting universities

• Top 3 reasons identified by parents as to why they contact universities

• Concern for their student• To resolve an issue• To complain

• Top 3 reasons identified by parents as to why they contact universities

• Concern for their student• To resolve an issue• To complain

Increase in parent interaction attributed

to:

Increase in parent interaction attributed

to: • Concern for safety

• Student development

• Consumerism perspective

• Technology

• Concern for safety

• Student development

• Consumerism perspective

• Technology

Parent cheerleadersParent cheerleaders

The emergence of the “Helicopter

Parent”

The emergence of the “Helicopter

Parent”• Media Stories

• ABC -Do Helicopter Moms Do More Harm Than Good?• Newsweek -parents buying text books and follow syllabi• Globe and Mail - parents handing out resumes at career

fairs

• Parent Groups• College Parents of America, Arlington Virginia

• Web Support Groups• www.mofchat.com

• Media Stories• ABC -Do Helicopter Moms Do More Harm Than Good?• Newsweek -parents buying text books and follow syllabi• Globe and Mail - parents handing out resumes at career

fairs

• Parent Groups• College Parents of America, Arlington Virginia

• Web Support Groups• www.mofchat.com

“Helicopter Parents”“Helicopter Parents”

Involvement:• Took their children to sports practice and games• Took their children to lessons, music, dance• Arranged for tutors for their children• Talked to children’s teachers about their grades• Advocate for students with disabilities• Use the phrase “we” when discussing details of a

request for your child, or when discussing child’s performance

Involvement:• Took their children to sports practice and games• Took their children to lessons, music, dance• Arranged for tutors for their children• Talked to children’s teachers about their grades• Advocate for students with disabilities• Use the phrase “we” when discussing details of a

request for your child, or when discussing child’s performance

“Helicopter Parents”“Helicopter Parents”

• What may have been considered “involved” in their grade school years, could very well become helicopter behaviour when in university/college

• Sometimes occurs when parents see education as an economic investment and they want to ensure that their investment “pays off”

• What may have been considered “involved” in their grade school years, could very well become helicopter behaviour when in university/college

• Sometimes occurs when parents see education as an economic investment and they want to ensure that their investment “pays off”

Initial university/college responses to these

behaviours

Initial university/college responses to these

behaviours

• “parent bouncers”• Parent liaison offices• Don’t call them, they’ll call you• Parents given the strong message that

it’s time to “let go”

• “parent bouncers”• Parent liaison offices• Don’t call them, they’ll call you• Parents given the strong message that

it’s time to “let go”

Emerging philosophy from the universities

Emerging philosophy from the universities

• More attempts to foster the relationship with parents to make them our partners and utilize their close relationships in more positive ways

• Orientation programs, parent websites, chats, listservs, parent/family weekends

• More attempts to foster the relationship with parents to make them our partners and utilize their close relationships in more positive ways

• Orientation programs, parent websites, chats, listservs, parent/family weekends

Typical parent program content of the 1990’s

Typical parent program content of the 1990’s

• The provision of a variety of information about campus life sprinkled with advice on letting go and allowing students to be the adults that we expect them to be

• Made assumptions that parents hadn’t changed when in fact they had

• The provision of a variety of information about campus life sprinkled with advice on letting go and allowing students to be the adults that we expect them to be

• Made assumptions that parents hadn’t changed when in fact they had

U of Windsor - parent program

U of Windsor - parent program

• 20 year history• Designed to compliment student

orientation and occupy parents• Eventually recognized that it is also a time

of transition for parents • Provided programming that we thought

would benefit the parent and the student

• 20 year history• Designed to compliment student

orientation and occupy parents• Eventually recognized that it is also a time

of transition for parents • Provided programming that we thought

would benefit the parent and the student

U of Windsor - parent program - in the

beginning

U of Windsor - parent program - in the

beginning

• Initially - heavy on student development theory

• Utilized lectures and skits to illustrate types of transition issues faced by new students and their families

• Initially - heavy on student development theory

• Utilized lectures and skits to illustrate types of transition issues faced by new students and their families

U of Windsor - parent program -embracing

change

U of Windsor - parent program -embracing

change • As parental involvement grew, the

program was revamped to provide more balance between factual information and student development information

• Although received with strong reviews, more changes were made

• As parental involvement grew, the program was revamped to provide more balance between factual information and student development information

• Although received with strong reviews, more changes were made

Recognize and capitalize on the the student/parent

bond

Recognize and capitalize on the the student/parent

bond

• Parents were still being “intrusive”• Communication from campus

community told us that others were also experiencing this

• Realization that parents and students today now have a very close bond and are interdependent

• Parents were still being “intrusive”• Communication from campus

community told us that others were also experiencing this

• Realization that parents and students today now have a very close bond and are interdependent

Embrace parents as partners

Embrace parents as partners

• Began to examine ways that we could encourage parents to act as our partners (coaches/mentors to their students rather than “fixers”)

• Support our efforts to assist students to become independent and confident problem solvers and self advocates

• Began to examine ways that we could encourage parents to act as our partners (coaches/mentors to their students rather than “fixers”)

• Support our efforts to assist students to become independent and confident problem solvers and self advocates

Campus consultations

Campus consultations

• Collaborate with campus community about the nature of their interactions with parents

• Provide them with information on the characteristics of today’s students and their parents

• Develop other means for communicating with parents

• Goal is to best serve the student, the parent and ourselves

• Collaborate with campus community about the nature of their interactions with parents

• Provide them with information on the characteristics of today’s students and their parents

• Develop other means for communicating with parents

• Goal is to best serve the student, the parent and ourselves

Benefits of embracing parents as partners

Benefits of embracing parents as partners

• Reinforcement of just-in-time information• Make the information meaningful to their

own experiences • Help to keep expectations realistic by

being up to date with university expectations

• Ask for students input

• Reinforcement of just-in-time information• Make the information meaningful to their

own experiences • Help to keep expectations realistic by

being up to date with university expectations

• Ask for students input

Meeting parents’ current needs

Meeting parents’ current needs

• Consider what parents want and need to know

• Sequence the information based on Maslow’s hierarchy of need theory

• Develop learning outcomes • Learning outcomes + relevant information for

parents = positive development for students

• Consider what parents want and need to know

• Sequence the information based on Maslow’s hierarchy of need theory

• Develop learning outcomes • Learning outcomes + relevant information for

parents = positive development for students

Consider varying parent populations

Consider varying parent populations

• What do they need to know based on who they are?

Parents:• Of first generation students• Of students with disabilities• Who are university grads• Of students living in residences• Of students commuting• Of international students

• What do they need to know based on who they are?

Parents:• Of first generation students• Of students with disabilities• Who are university grads• Of students living in residences• Of students commuting• Of international students

When do we really need them to be

involved?

When do we really need them to be

involved?

Issues surrounding • physical and mental health• financial concerns• crisis situations

Issues surrounding • physical and mental health• financial concerns• crisis situations

Parent service providers:

programming

Parent service providers:

programming• Parent Orientations• Parent handbooks and resource guides• Parent receptions• Parent websites• Listservs• Telephone help lines• Newsletters -paper and electronic

• Parent Orientations• Parent handbooks and resource guides• Parent receptions• Parent websites• Listservs• Telephone help lines• Newsletters -paper and electronic

Programs & servicesPrograms & services

• Parent weekends• Technology based communications

• Emails -weekly, monthly, biannually• Monthly webcasts, pod casts,• Online workshops• Message boards for advice and feedback• Parent councils -more U.S. based

• Parent weekends• Technology based communications

• Emails -weekly, monthly, biannually• Monthly webcasts, pod casts,• Online workshops• Message boards for advice and feedback• Parent councils -more U.S. based

Final words of adviceFinal words of advice

• Be clear and upfront about your desire to partner

• identify learning outcomes you are targeting

• Provide easy to understand information about student development

• Provide a consistent philosophy and desired outcomes across campus

• Be clear and upfront about your desire to partner

• identify learning outcomes you are targeting

• Provide easy to understand information about student development

• Provide a consistent philosophy and desired outcomes across campus

Final wordsFinal words• Develop crisis management protocols

for communication with parents• Keep in touch with your students and

ask them what they need parents to know

• Listen, listen, listen to parents’ concerns• Keep up to date on resources

• Develop crisis management protocols for communication with parents

• Keep in touch with your students and ask them what they need parents to know

• Listen, listen, listen to parents’ concerns• Keep up to date on resources

Web resourcesWeb resources

• University of Windsor Parent Program• http://www.uwindsor.ca/parents

• National Resource Centre for First Year Experiences http://www.sc.edu/fye/

• National Association for Student Personnel Administators http://www.naspa.org

• National Orientation Directors Association http://www.nodaweb.org

• University of Windsor Parent Program• http://www.uwindsor.ca/parents

• National Resource Centre for First Year Experiences http://www.sc.edu/fye/

• National Association for Student Personnel Administators http://www.naspa.org

• National Orientation Directors Association http://www.nodaweb.org

Additional Resources Additional Resources

• National Survey of Parent Programs http://www.parent.umn.edu/ParentProgSurvey.pdf

• APPI – Administrators Promoting Parent Involvement http://www.appi.gmu.edu

• New Directions for Student Services• Consumers, Adversaries and Partners: Working with the

Families of Undergraduates. Number 94 Summer 2001• Serving the Millennial Generation. Number 106,

Summer 2004

• National Survey of Parent Programs http://www.parent.umn.edu/ParentProgSurvey.pdf

• APPI – Administrators Promoting Parent Involvement http://www.appi.gmu.edu

• New Directions for Student Services• Consumers, Adversaries and Partners: Working with the

Families of Undergraduates. Number 94 Summer 2001• Serving the Millennial Generation. Number 106,

Summer 2004