Attraction and Relationships

“Thin slicing”: How first impressions matter

Judging personality traits (Willis & Todorov, 2006)

Ppts. saw pictures of faces at various durationsAttractiveness, likeability, competence,

trustworthiness, aggressiveness1/10 of a second correlated with judgments

without time limitsStrongest results for trustworthinessIn another study: ppts predict winning and

loosing political candidates from pictures

“Thin slicing”: How first impressions matter

Teacher evaluations (Ambady & Rosenthal, 1993)

10, 5, 2 sec. long videotape of prof’s teaching…predicted student evaluations at the end of

term

“Thin slicing”: How first impressions matter

Do people agree on first impressions?Yes

The 1 million $ chicken-egg question:

Lecture Outline

1) The Psychology of attraction Propinquity Similarity Physical attractiveness Mate preferences

Propinquity

Physical proximity encourages liking, friendships, and romance

“Police Academy” study

Propinquity

Explanations of Propinquity Effects Availability encourages interactions Anticipating Interactions produces warm

feelings The Mere Exposure Effect: repeated

exposure breeds familiarity, which encourages liking

Turkish words examples: kadirga, afworbu, lokanta

Mere Exposure Effect

Does not need conscious reflection—same effect with subliminal exposure

One psychological factor as to why advertising works

Similarity

Similarity breeds attraction

“birds of a feather…” Engaged couples study “Bogus Stranger” studies

What about opposites attract? Yes, few exceptions Sexual attraction A few personality traits (dominant/submissive,

talkative/quiet, nurturing/needy

Why Does Similarity Encourage Attraction?

Social validation Smooth social interactions We Expect Similar Others to Like Us Similar Others Have Qualities We Like

Physical Attractiveness: Important feature of first impressions

”Halo effect”: belief that attractive people possess other positive qualities Attractive people earn more Attractive defendants are less likely to be

convicted, and receive lighter sentences Men more likely to come to aid of

attractive females Essays attributed to attractive author

evaluated more favorably Etc.

Origins of Physical Attractiveness

Is it arbitrary cultural convention or are there innate preferences?

Cultural aspect #1: Thinness

Origins of Physical Attractiveness

Is it arbitrary cultural convention or are there innate preferences?

Cultural aspect #1: Thinness Cultural aspect #2: Skin tone

Origins of Physical Attractiveness

Innate aspect Babies look longer at what adults consider to be

attractive faces Video clip

Cross cultural agreement on attractive faces

Origins of Physical Attractiveness

Innate architecture of physical attractiveness

Bilateral symmetry (facial and bodily) is attractive Average faces are attractive (Langlois & Roggman,

1990) Healthy skin is attractive In general, features that were associated with

reproductive health in the ancestral environment are considered attractive

Mate Preferences (rank) by gender in 37 cultures

Trait M F

Mutual attraction 1 1

Dependable character 2 2

Maturity 3 3

Good health 5 7

Sociability 7 6

Good looks 10 13

Gender Differences in Mate Preferences

There are reliable gender differences in mate preferences--drum rolls, please

On average, men prefer physical attractiveness and youth more than women

On average, women prefer status and older age more than men

Warning: the naturalistic fallacy

Largest and Smallest gender differences

Chastity: Large cultural variation and unreliable or no gender differences

Good financial prospects: large gender differences and little cultural variation

Gender Differences in Mate Preferences

Parental investment theory

Evolution has instilled in men and women desires that are advantageous to their reproductive success

Biologically, women invest more in their offspring then men

Women are the choosier gender in humans

Women should prefer men with resources

Men should prefer fertility (youthful appearance)

Gender Differences in Mate Preferences

Is the parental investment predictions anything more than common sense?

cross-species comparisons (the Panamanian poison-arrow frog, hyenas, emperor penguins)

Cross culturally universal

but also large cultural variation—overall more cultural differences than gender differences

Gender inequality correlated with the size of the gender difference in preference for status (Eagly and Wood)

Gender Differences in Mate Preferences

Is the parental investment predictions anything more than common sense?

Ovulating women find masculine men more attractive

but this is not exactly derived from parental investment theory

Some Conclusions about Gender Differences in Mate Preferences

Systematic average gender differences predicted by parental investment theory

Cultural context plays more important role than gender for all other traits

Complex interaction of life history, culture, and gender-specific preferences

Naturalistic fallacy—evolutionary explanation is not moral justification!

Lecture Outline

2) The Psychology of relationships Passionate and companionate love Marriage

Passionate vs. companionate love (Berscheild & Walster)

Passionate love Intense longing, ecstasy/despair Intense but brief Like a drug, a burning fire

Companionate love Feelings of intimacy, care, connection Slow growing but long lasting Like vines growing and intertwining, binding

The myth of eternal passion

Love and Marriage across Cultures (Levine et al, 1995)

If a man (woman) had all other qualities you desired, would you marry this person if you were not in love? (% AGREE)

Patna, Fresno, Birm, Kyoto HKIndia Calif UK JP49% 3.5% 7.3% 2.3% 5.8%

Love and Marriage across Cultures (Levine et al, 1995)

If love has completely disappeared from a marriage, OK for couple to make a clean break and start new lives? (% AGREE)

Patna, Fresno, Birm, Kyoto HKIndia Calif UK JP46% 35% 45% 41% 47%

Time (6 months)

Inte

nsity

Companionate

Passionate

Danger points

From: Haidt, The Happiness Hypothesis

Two Loves, Two Errors

Time (60 years)

Inte

nsity

Companionate

Passionate

From: Haidt, The Happiness Hypothesis

The Longer Term Picture