belief step1
TRANSCRIPT
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Change YourLIMITINGBELIEFSStep One
www.MeaningfulGoals.com
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Also by Kevin Bermingham
CHANGE YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS
Step Two: Become More Empowered
CHANGE YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS
Step Three: Commit To New Beliefs
CHANGE YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS
Daily Diary
CHANGE YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS
Three Steps To Achieve Meaningful Goals
(A compilation of all three steps & the daily diary)
THE SEVEN PRINCIPLES OF MEANINGFUL GOALSHow You Can Easily Achieve Your Wildest Dreams
ACHIEVE YOUR WILDEST DREAMS
The 3-Step Goal Achievement System, Workbook, DVD & CD
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Change YourLIMITINGBELIEFSStep One
Assess
Step One
Become
Step Two
Commit
Step Three
Assess
Step One
Become
Step Two
Commit
Step Three
Kevin BerminghamBSc, MBA, MPracNLP, CMC
The Project Management & Goal Achievement Expert
Meaningful Goals Ltd
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First published in Great Britain in 2010 by Meaningful Goals Ltd., Sussex,England. www.MeaningfulGoals.com
Copyright 2010 by T.P. Kevin Bermingham, all rights reserved.
Kevin Bermingham has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and PatentsAct 1988 to be identified as the author of this work.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, ortransmitted in any form or any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying,recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted by the Copyright, Designsand Patents Act 1988, without either the prior written permission of the Publisheror the author.
This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade orotherwise, be lent, resold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher'sprior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it ispublished and without a similar condition, including this condition, being imposedon the subsequent purchaser.
Trademarks of Kevin Bermingham are not designated in the text of thispublication. The following are trademarks of Kevin Bermingham and may not beused without permission:
Meaningful GoalsAchieve Your Wildest Dreams
The Seven Principles of Meaningful Goals
Three Steps To Achieve Meaningful Goals
The 3-Step Goal Achievement System
Goal Achiever's Mastermind Group
Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty: While the publisher and author haveused their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations orwarranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of thisbook and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitnessfor a particular purpose. The advice and strategies contained herein may not besuitable for your situation. Neither the publisher or author is engaged in renderingprofessional services, and you should consult a professional where appropriate.Neither the publisher nor author shall be liable for any loss of profit or any othercommercial damages, including but not limited to special, incidental, consequential,or other damages.
Rear Cover Photograph 2010 by Laura Morganwww.LauraMorganPhotography.co.uk
V4b-pocket
ISBN 978-1-908101-01-3
1. Personal development. 2. Self-help. 3. Success in business.
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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
From the start Id like to thank you for whateverinvestment youve made to read this book. Itwas written specifically for you. I hope youllforgive my informal style of writing it simply
helps me feel that Im talking directly to you andI hope you find that useful.
I'd like to thank my past and presentteachers who, either in person or in print, havehelped me in some way to write this book. I'm
deeply grateful to all of these giants; upon whoseshoulders I've stood to see my own dream.
Many thanks to Ian Jones, my goalachievement coach. The book would never havebeen started without him. Id also like to thankthe many people who freely donated their time
to review and comment on the drafts youknow who you are!
My grateful thanks go to my wife Bernice;for her enduring and bemused patience.
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CONTENTSIntroduction 9Attitude To Life 17Philosophy On Life 19Step One - Assess Your Old Beliefs 27The 3-Step Series 45Bibliography 47About the Author 49Next Steps 51
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Change Your Limiting Beliefs has a clear
message we can change our beliefs for thebetter and make them suit the lives we want
as individuals. It makes sense; I understood it
all and its in a logical sequence. The exercises
work; they fit into the overall structure and
are applicable to my style of learning. Did I
find it useful and relevant? Totally!
Martin Cornes, Director - The Coaching
Foundation Ltd.
Please commit to carrying out the writtenexercises youll only get good results bythinking about the questions in the exercises andthen writing your answers in the book. If theinstructions sometimes seem a little ambiguous,its simply a technique to engage yourunconscious mind; thats how it works. If youdont know the answer to a question guess!
And, if you have a belief that its wrong to writein books...
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10Change Your Limiting Beliefs Do you feel frustrated because your life
isn't turning out as expected? Are others achieving their dreams, but
not you?
If so, its probably because you have
Limiting Beliefsholding you back.
For example, some people believe theyreinadequate, some believe theyre stupid, someunloved, etc. Maybe you believe that we are alllimited by our upbringing? Whatever yours is -
youre not alone!Which limiting belief would you change if
you could?
How would you like to change ANY beliefyou wish? Is that really possible?
Well, actually Yes!
I did it myself. In 1990, my life was goingnowhere; I was nursing my second duodenalulcer and fire fighting my way through 14-hour,stress-filled days.
Then something happened to shake up myworld. I realised I was simply trapped in amediocre job following someone else's dream.So I changed my beliefs and finally achieved my
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Introduction 11
I am always doingthings I cant do.That is how I get todo them.- Pablo Picasso
own dream. See the Case Study- Follow Your
Dreamfor details.I'm not
particularly giftedor special, so Iknow everyone elsecan achieve their
dreams too.
After Idretired from work,curiosity got thebetter of me and I looked for answers to explain
how I'd unexpectedly done so well.Over the last 5 years, I've invested a lot of
time and money researching what othersuccessful achievers were doing.
I've trained and consulted with experts in
specific techniques; each of whom knew a pieceof the puzzle. They were applying it in suchdiverse areas as marketing, sales, personaldevelopment and of course projectmanagement.
I went on to compare what Id learned withthe things I'd achieved in the past - and how I'ddone it.
Then I coached people and carried outexperiments to see if the secrets I'd discoveredcould be applied by anyone.
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12Change Your Limiting BeliefsCASE STUDY Follow Your
Dream
For the first two decades of my life, I'd set
myself targets; made lists of what I wanted
to do or have; made New Year resolutions
and promises; then waited for success - but
it didnt work! I'd simply discovered thatlist-making and hoping doesn't achieve
goals!
Then, I had a life-changing experience
and, for the next two decades, I started
reliably achieving goals How? Was it just
magic, or was there a formula...?
It started in 1990 after my best friend
Tom died of cancer aged 40. That woke me
up - I had to do something. Then one
Sunday I saw Sir John Harvey-Jones on
television, rescuing failing companies, as
the "Trouble-shooter". In a flash, I could see
how he did it and had a vision of myself in
his shoes, doing it too. Id simply decided "I
can do it!... .................................... (Ctd...)
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Introduction 13CASE STUDY Follow Your
Dream (Ctd.)
...I had no idea how, or where, to start.
But eventually, in 1991 I set myself 3
impossible goals and embarked on a 10-
year mission to achieve them.
As a result, I found myself in a job as a
multi-million pound project manager with
no Project Management qualifications;
then went on to get an MBA, finally setting
up my own management consultancy
company. On the way, Id doubled my
income in a single year; and then went on
to do it again a few years later. Finally
achieving a six figure income in 1998 -
when money was still worth something!
By 2001, I'd become wealthy enough
to retire and travel the world - while still in
my 40's.
I'd finally achieved my own Wildest
Dream - to have sufficient passive income
that I need never work again.
Kevin Bermingham, Author
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14Change Your Limiting Beliefs
If you want things tobe different,perhaps the answeris to becomedifferent yourself.
- Norman VincentPeale
Eventually, it all boiled down to just seven
fundamental principles - The Seven Principles ofMeaningful Goals How You Can Easily AchieveYour Wildest Dreams [Bermingham, 2010].
However, in this book youre reading, we'rejust concentrating on one of them; one thatcould change your life forever - Beliefs.
In my experience, the process of challengingbeliefs from different perspectives can achieveresults that will dramatically change youroutlook on life.
Now, I have an admission to make. By itself,this series can'tremove or changea belief you don'tlike; nor make yourdreams come true.
I wish it could. Thetruth is - only youcan do that. Onlyyou can do thework needed totake back control
of your ownbeliefs.
I can only give the benefit of my experienceand teach you some of the tools that worked forme you have to do the rest. If you find that
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Introduction 15you need support, putting the series into
practice, then our live seminars and workshopsmay help.
These go into greater detail, have interactivegroup exercises, and use more advancedimagination techniques than are possible toteach in any book. Youll find more details in
the Next Stepssection.
So in this series, we'll use my three simplesteps to change at least one of the beliefs thatare limiting your potential right now. I call it theThree Steps To Achieve Meaningful
Goals.
Step One - Assess Your Old BeliefsIdentify the limiting beliefs holdingyou back.
Step Two - Become More EmpoweredReplace limiting beliefs withempowering beliefs.
Step Three - Commit To New BeliefsMake sure these empowering beliefsare permanent, so you dont becomestuck again in future.
Consider this series to be the beginning ofyour journey.
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For success,attitude is equallyimportant as ability.- Harry F. Banks
Attitude To LifeDid you know that success in life and ourability to achieve goals comes down to howwe deal with obstacles? And that dependson our attitudes and philosophy on life.
With an empowering attitude andphilosophy, the world is our oyster. Withoutthem, it seems like every person, event andsituation becomes an obstacle to our success.
We say some
people have apositive, or good,attitude about aparticular topic andthat others have anegative, or bad,
attitude instead.This attitude is simply the result of their own
particular set of Values (i.e. the things that areimportant to them) and their associated Beliefs.
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18Change Your Limiting BeliefsIf we feel our own attitude is negative, then
we may be living life in a way thats in conflictwith the things we value most.
Or perhaps we just have a negativephilosophy or outlook on life.
Maybe within our philosophy, we have an
individual belief that is disempowering; limitingour opportunities, or holding us back.
Because they all hold us back in one way oranother, we simply call these negative anddisempowering beliefs Limiting Beliefs.
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Philosophy OnLife
Have you ever considered what your own
philosophy on life is? Your philosophy is apersonal system of beliefs - some of whichare true and some of which are not. Thisunique personal philosophy influences everyaspect of our life.
Would any of the following philosophies fit
you?
All good things must come to an end
Life is hard and then you die
Everyone is against you
You must compete to survive
You have to work hard to become rich
Good single men (women) are hard tofind
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20Change Your Limiting Beliefs All men act like children
A woman's place is in the home
Sex ends after marriage
Love is only found in fairytales
There's not enough of anything to go
aroundHmmm, they're not very empowering are they?
If you're not doing as well as you'd like inlife, then chances are you may have similar'excuses' to give, or 'stories' to tell.
Let's assume you're one of the lucky ones;your lifes going well and you have a verydifferent outlook on life...
We make our own luck
Life is meant to be enjoyed Strangers are just friends I haven't met
Life's challenging, but we're more thanthat
You get out what you put in Life's just one great day after another
Things are gonna get better
Even if I lose all my money, Ill still havemy friends
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Philosophy on Life 21 Seek and you will find
Life is a school with many lessons tohelp us do better
Everyone has their strengths andweaknesses
It's easier to create money than to spendit
...because you're worth it!
Every cloud has a silver lining
Im in control of my destiny
What sort of results in life do you think you'dhave with one of these philosophies instead? Ifyou had a choice, which particular philosophywould you choose?
Now its time to carry out your first exercise dont worry, I wont send you to the gym.
The exercise is called: Whats YourPhilosophy On Life?
When youre finished, close your eyes.Imagine what you would have to believe for thatnew empowering philosophy to be yours. Whatwould have to be different? How does it feelwhen you give yourself permission to consider it- scary, or exciting?
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Philosophy on Life 23How would you like to put that new
philosophy into practice?A philosophy on life is simply a collection of
beliefs that we use to guide our lives. If wereplace one of our beliefs with something morepositive and empowering then were already
moving towards having a more empoweringphilosophy.
Heres a reminder of the simple systemwere going to be using. Its designed to changethe beliefs that are holding you back.
Step One - Assess Your Old BeliefsIdentify the limiting beliefs holdingyou back.
Step Two - Become More EmpoweredReplace limiting beliefs withempowering beliefs.
Step Three - Commit To New BeliefsMake sure these empowering beliefs
are permanent, so you dont becomestuck again in future.
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24Change Your Limiting BeliefsCase Study Change Your
Philosophy
In the past, I worked in a service and
repair department. I naturally developed
the cynical philosophy that you can't ever
rely on things - they always go wrong.
One weekend, I offered to take my 10
year old son to visit a giant toy shop in
London to buy him a birthday present.
You can imagine my surprise when he
said: Thanks Dad, but would it be OK if webought something locally instead; it would
be such a long journey to take it all the
way back to London when it goes wrong.
My cynical philosophy had already rubbed
off on him.
That very moment, I decided to change
my philosophy to a more optimistic one. I
gave up my repair job and started a design
job instead. Now my glass always seems
half full, rather than half empty.
Kevin Bermingham, Author
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Philosophy on Life 25How are you doing so far? Are you ready to
change a belief yet? I know it seems a lot to takein and it might feel daunting at first. But dontworry. Its all very simple and well take it onestep at a time.
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Step OneAssess Your Old
BeliefsHave you ever felt frustrated because yourlife isn't turning out as you expected? In my
experience, if we get our beliefs wrong, thenour life goes wrong. Our knowledge of thereal worldis limited. So to get by, we relyon our beliefs instead. They're the principlesand rules by which we assume the worldworks.
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28Change Your Limiting BeliefsIn this first step well take stock and assess
what our current beliefs really are - then, iftheyre not useful, well decide what they need tobe instead.
In my experience, one of our mainproblems in life is that we believe
our own beliefs.
Beliefs are not facts... and they're not alwaystrue. Beliefs are simply a feeling of conviction orcertainty that something is real or true. Theyre
based on our past experiences and what othershave taught us. Beliefs are our best guess atreality - our mental model of how the worldappears to work.
Our beliefs help us make sense of how ourworld works.
Theyre our explanations of the world;they help us decide what things mean
Theyre our rules about which things
cause what effects
They give us permission about what'sallowed and what's not
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Assess Your Old Beliefs 29
Argue for yourlimitations and,sure enough,they're yours.- Richard Bach
But beliefs also shape the boundaries of
our thinking. And they can create many of theobstacles that stop us from stepping outsideour comfort zoneof familiarity.
Most worthwhile goals require us to crossthese boundaries at some point. And its ourbeliefs that limit us from doing that so we get
FRUSTRATEDand FEEL STUCK!
The majority of obstacles to achieving goalsare imaginary; they're a result of our beliefs. Thereason some people can achieve a goal thatsomeone else can't is often down to their
different philosophies and attitudes (especiallytheir beliefs).
Weve a great personal investment inmaintaining our beliefs. So much so, that even ifthey're not true, they'll often become self-
fulfilling prophesies.For example, ifsomething's not truebut you believe it is,you'll act as if it'strue. Eventually your
behaviour will createthe evidence tosupport it.
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30Change Your Limiting BeliefsSome beliefs hold us back fromachieving our goals. We callthese Limiting Beliefs and wellmainly focus on these throughoutthis book.
CASE STUDY My Belief WasThe Obstacle
Like a lot of people, I was stuck.I'd
always had a dream of selling up, retiring
and living abroad. But I needed to sell mybusiness first.
However, I believedthe unusual nature
of my business and its problems with
product quality made it too unattractive.
There were just too many impossible
obstacles. So I put it off... maybe Ill do it
next year.
One day Kevin got tired of my lame
excuses and called my bluff. He offered to
help me on one condition - that I started
right now!
(Ctd...)
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Assess Your Old Beliefs 31
In our last case, Howard could only seeobstacles because his Limiting Beliefsprevented him from exploring possiblesolutions. When hed created enough evidence it
changed his belief about what was possible ornot and then all his obstacles disappeared.
CASE STUDY My Belief Was
The Obstacle (Ctd.)
...Over the next 2 years, I took his
advice and applied his techniques. As a
result, I finally wrote down all the
operating procedures for my business and
they quickly resolved our quality issues. Theevidence produced by getting the business
back under control finally changed my
belief about it being unattractive to sell.
Not only did I double my profits over
those two years, but the sale of my
business went far smoother than I had
expected.
Howard Peters, ex-owner
Tudor Diamonds Ltd.
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32Change Your Limiting Beliefs
The map is not theterritory.- Alfred Korzybski
But our beliefs
dont just create ourmaps of pastexperience; theyalso form theblueprints for ourfuture actions.
Luckily, if we don't like them, we can changethem. And we'll talk about how to do that later.
In her book, Cognitive Therapy: Basics andBeyond [Beck, 1995], Judith Beck describes theconcept of Core Beliefs. Her definition of a
Core Belief is simply one that starts with "I".For example, I might say "I'm a healthy
person" - thats a positive core belief, or "I'mboring"- thats a negative core belief.
Judith also describes another type of belief.
These are called Supporting Beliefsbecausethey don't start with "I". Theyre simply aprediction about what others will think or do.For example, I might say "Nobody ever findsme interesting."
But, if I hadn't behaved as if my negativecore belief was true (e.g. "I'm boring"), thenothers may well have found me to be interesting.So I wouldnt have accumulated any evidence tosupport my secondary belief (e.g. "Nobody everfinds me interesting").
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Assess Your Old Beliefs 33
Whether you thinkyou can or think youcan't; you are right.
- Henry Ford
When we have a positive or negative core
belief we'll soon find sufficient evidence tocreate as many supporting beliefs as we need -it's a self-fulfilling-prophecy.
Even thoughweve created thosesecondary beliefs
ourselves, they canstill make us feellike victims. As aresult, we canappear to be at the
mercy of what others think or do.These core beliefs can affect our happiness
and our options and opportunities in life - forgood, or bad.
An important point is that we can choose to
disbelieve or change our core beliefs. And, thegood news is that this applies equally to positiveor negative beliefs.
Consider the following:
Beliefs are ideas, theyre not necessarilytruths. And their truth can be tested.
They can feel like they are true, and yetstill be untrue.
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34Change Your Limiting Beliefs
An old belief is likean old shoe. We sovalue its comfortthat we fail to noticethe hole in it.- Robert Brault
Our core beliefs are usually rooted in
childhood events. It may even not havebeen true at the time we created it.
A belief persists because we regularlylook for evidence to support it, while wediscount evidence to the contrary.
A negative belief is replaced by a morerealistic view of the world when weveaccumulated the evidence to disprove it.
Changing a
negative belief maytake some time -yet with the rightevidence, it canhappen in aninstant.
Examples oflimiting corebeliefs would be:
I'm not worth anything.
I'm bad. I'm unlovable.
I'm powerless. I'm a failure
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Assess Your Old Beliefs 35 I'm not young enough (old enough, clever
enough, educated enough, well enough, richenough, talented enough, thin enough, etc.) tobe, do, or have, whatever it is I desire.
Are any of these beliefs true?How would you know if they are,or if they're not? Whos the
judge?
Our beliefs can be both permissions andlimitations. When we change our core beliefs,we get back control of our lives. Then we're nolonger STUCK.
A positive core belief allows for moreflexibility of behaviour. They need not even be
the exact opposite of limiting beliefs - simply abit more positive. For example:
I've got my strengths and weaknesses,like most people.
I'm a balanced person, with bothpositive and negative attributes.
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36Change Your Limiting Beliefs
Man is a credulousanimal, and mustbelieve something; inthe absence of goodgrounds for belief,he will be satisfiedwith bad ones.- Bertrand Russell
I'm generally likable. Although I don't
like everyone I meet, so I don't expecteveryone to like me either.
I've got control over many things.
I'm usually successful doing what Ivalue most.
The good news is that when our beliefs aresimilar to others' then well also feel a sense ofempathy and rapport with them - even morethan if wed just shared common experiences oractivities. So, even if you don't share someone's
belief, showing respect for their belief will buildgreater rapport.
Our beliefsevolve intoknowledge whenthere is cleartestable evidencethat they're true.Paradoxically,even if there isevidence, it does
not becomeknowledge if it'snot believed.
Heres an example: We all know its a factthat the earth is a sphere. Yet, in the distant past,
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Assess Your Old Beliefs 37people ignored any evidence that it was true,
because they knewit was flat.So nobody believed the earth was a sphere -
the truth hadn't yet become knowledge.
"Why is this a problem?" you may be asking.
Well, some beliefs, for example "I must be a
lucky person, because I've always succeeded",are positive beliefs that spur us on to overcomeobstacles - they motivate the behaviours thatmake the positive belief self-fulfilling.
Other beliefs, for example "Im a poor
learner", or "Im not good with computers", arelimiting beliefs. They may cause us to abdicateresponsibility for our behaviour, or our results inlife. And that can hold us back from makingprogress.
Limiting beliefs are often theEXCUSES we use to justify oursituation in life listen out foryours when youre talking.
Yet none of this is set in stone. Limitingbeliefs are often obsolete beliefs. They onlypersist, and continue to limit our achievements,because we chose not to question them.
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38Change Your Limiting BeliefsBeliefs often have their Achilles Heel. Like a
stool with three supporting legs; when youremove just one, it falls over. Simply looking at abelief from a different perspective - and seeingsomething new - will often cause the limitingbelief to collapse.
Lets just summarise for a moment. Weve
seen that beliefs can be about:
what things mean (i.e. explanations)
which things cause what effects (i.e.
rules)
what's possible and whats not (i.e.permissions)
what's important to us and whats not(i.e. values)
Because our own beliefs have such a hugeeffect on our experiences, achievements andresults in life, it's important to become aware ofwhat they are.
Putting them on paper is the first step todealing with them; simply because we first haveto own up to what they are.
The earlier exercise Whats YourPhilosophy On Life? Should have already
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Assess Your Old Beliefs 39
Ninety-nine percentof the failures comefrom people whohave the habit ofmaking excuses.- GeorgeWashington Carver
given you an insight into what it is that you
believe.And if you
need further helpidentifying yourlimiting beliefs just make a list of
the excuses youuse everyday.
Youll also findsome typicalexamples of beliefs
on page 28.Remember, theyre just examples yours maybe different.
The next exercise, Identify YourLimiting Beliefs, involves writing our beliefs
down - this makes them more real, becausetheyre no longer hidden from our consciousmind.
When youve finished, well move on to thenext exercise: Assess Your Big LimitingBelief. But, so that you have something towork with, only move on to this exercise afteryouve completed the last exercise: IdentifyYour Limiting Beliefs.
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40Change Your Limiting Beliefs
EXERCISE IdentifyYour LimitingBeliefs
Write down FIVE beliefs that have limited
you in some way.
E.g. I am..., I cant..., I dont have...,
People like us..., It's not possible to...,
etc. (See page 28 for examples)
(1) ...........................................................
(2) ...........................................................
(3) ...........................................................
(4) ...........................................................
(5) ...........................................................
What do you think after you write them
down?
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Assess Your Old Beliefs 41
EXERCISE - AssessYour Big LimitingBelief
1. Now select The BIG One from the list you
made in the last exercise. Thats right, the
one thats REALLY limited who, or what,
you are or couldve been.
E.g. I'm no good, I'm always wrong, Ill
never amount to anything, I am a poor
learner, etc.
Write it below, starting with I (See more
examples on page 28).
.................................................................
2. You can add on your reason if it helps.
E.g. Because... I was made redundant / Ifailed my university degree / I was abused
as a child, etc.
.................................................................
3. This belief wasnt always true. So, when didyou decide it was?
.................................................................
(Ctd.)
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42Change Your Limiting Beliefs
EXERCISE - AssessYour Big LimitingBelief (Ctd.)
4. Write down 3 specific things this belief has
already cost you.
E.g. lost opportunities for..., good health,
financial security, relationship with..., etc.
They can be general, or specific instances.
(a) ...........................................................
(b) ...........................................................
(c) ............................................................
How does it make you feel to write this down?Are you ready to do something about it yet?
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Assess Your Old Beliefs 43Here are some examples of beliefs that Ive
heard from past clients and seminar delegates. Ifyoure not sure about what your own beliefs are,then this could be the most useful page in thebook.
Examples of Limiting Beliefs
I'm not good enough, I'm unsuccessful, I'm
inferior, I cant get it right, I cant fix it, Its all
my fault, I'm stupid, I'm guilty, I've a learning
problem, I'm bad, I'm a failure, I'm too slow,
I'm ugly, I'm fat, I'm unattractive, I cant be
myself, I'm crazy, I'm unbalanced, I dont
deserve to be loved, I dont deserve anything,
I'm useless, I dont know anything, I'm in the
wrong place, I'm no good, I'm always wrong, I
cant understand anything, I'm a failure, I'm
helpless, I cant, I'm weak, I'm inadequate, I'm
powerless, I dont have any choice, I'm not in
control, I'm always second best, I cant stand
up for myself, I just cant say no, I'm a victim,
I'm vulnerable, I'm afraid, I cant defend
myself, I'm helpless, I'm uncertain, I dontmatter, I'm not lovable, I'm boring, I'm nothing
special, I'm all alone, I dont matter, I dont
belong, Im nothing, I dont fit in, I'm not
important, Im a nobody, I'm uninteresting...
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44Change Your Limiting Beliefs
Examples of Empowering Beliefs
I can do anything I choose, Im in charge of my
own destiny, I'm a good person, Im
optimistic, Im a people-person, I can do it, I'm
powerful, I like people, Im a good worker, I'm
courageous, Its a great life, I'm a problem-
solver, I'm loved and wanted, I've a great
memory, I'm not perfect - but Im close, I'm
an investor, I'm a natural team-player, I'm
friendly and caring, I'm only ugly on the
outside (joke!), I'm fast, I'm attractive, Imalways myself, I'm healthy, I'm fit, Im an ideal
weight, I deserve the great things I have, I'm
wealthy and wise, I dont know how to fail,
I'm in the right place, I'm good; very good, I'm
able to ask for what I need, I'm assertive, I'm
helpful, I'm interested in everything...
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The 3-StepSeries
Congratulations, youve now reached the
end of this portion of the series. Remember,this book is just one part of four; so look outfor the next instalment.
Step 1:Assess Your Old BeliefsStep 2:Become More EmpoweredStep 3:Commit To New BeliefsAppendix:Daily Diary
If you feel you cant wait for the nextinstalment, then the complete 3-step series on
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46Change Your Limiting BeliefsLimiting Beliefs is now available, including the
Appendix, in a single compilation volume.Available from www.MeaningfulGoals.com.
Change Your Limiting Beliefs -
Three Steps To AchieveMeaningful Goals
By Kevin Bermingham
(ISBN 978-1-908101-03-7)
www.MeaningfulGoals.com
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48Change Your Limiting BeliefsMitchell, Byron Kathleen. Loving What Is. New
York, USA: Harmony Books, 2002.Morrison, Topher. Settle for Excellence. USA:
Topher Morrison, 2006.
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About theAuthorKEVIN BERMINGHAM
The Project ManagementGoal Achievement ExpertKevin Bermingham was a successful corporateproject manager for over 10 years and becamean independent management consultant for 6years. He has worked all over the world andmanaged multi-million pound projects for bluechip companies including Shell International,
National Air Traffic Services, Civil AviationAuthority, London Electricity, SEEBOARD,Nokia and AT&T.
Back in 1990, way before his MBA, Kevinwas going nowhere; nursing his secondduodenal ulcer and fire fighting through 14-
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50Change Your Limiting Beliefshour, stress-filled days. Trapped in a mediocre
job, following someone else's dream.Then, when his best friend Tom died of
cancer at age 40, Kevin finally WOKE UP.Focusing on his own Wildest Dream, he sethimself three "impossible goals" to achieve within10 years - and succeeded!
By 2001, Kevin had made his fortune and,while still in his 40's, retired to travel the world -never having to work again.
"My personal vision is of a world where people ofany age, nationality, or educational background
have the tools to redesign their own future. A
more dependable future - despite living in such an
unpredictable world.
For the last 5 years, I've made it my mission
to help people harness their imagination, so they
can breathe life into their dreams and overcome
the obstacles that previously held them back.
The publication of this book is yet another
successful goal towards achieving that dream.
Kevin Bermingham, Author
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Next StepsI have to come clean here.
With the best will in the world this series byitself can't remove or change a belief you don'tlike; nor achieve your goals, or make your
dreams come true. I wish it could.In this series, I've given the benefit of my
experience and taught you some of the basictools that worked for me and others that Ivecoached. Theyre simply my insights into a
world of possibilities.Because of their nature, books have many
limitations. But, at my live seminars andworkshops we're able to go into much greaterdetail that was possible here. We use interactivegroup exercises and imagination techniques thatreally aren't possible to teach in a book.
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Seminar Success Story PastBlockages
Kevins Achieve Your Wildest Dreams was a
really positive and powerful seminar. There
were some fantastically good things in thereand I actually bought one of his videos.
The things that came up for me during the
seminar really surprised me. He got us to think
about beliefs that have blocked us in the past -
things we tend not to think about and I've beenable to just wipe them out!
Ian Jones, CreativeProvocation.com
Seminar Success Story Visualising Goals
I attended Kevin's chieve Your Wildest
Dreams seminar last week. And the biggest
thing I got out of it was the whole principle of
visualising goals. I've now set clear goals for 3
years into the future using his simple process ofvisualisation. I've even come away with a CD so
I can reinforce what I learned.
Mike Turner, Retail Digital Coaching
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54Change Your Limiting Beliefs
Goal Achiever'sMastermind GroupPutting your Meaningful G oals into practice
For breakthrough insights, ongoing mentoringand support, you may wish to join our Goal
Achiever's Mastermind GroupThis is a very select group of people with
serious goals to achieve. It's not for everyone, sobefore joining potential members will have topass certain criteria. And, to maintain quality,the group is always limited to a maximum of 25people. We meet monthly to share ideas andexperiences, and to motivate and support oneanother. As a company, we facilitate themeetings and provide them with ongoingtraining in goal achievement principles and
practice. Fortnightly achievement coachingsessions are also included on a one-to-one basis- so our membership has every chance ofachieving their goals.
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Information about
Achieve Your Wildest Dreams
and the
Goal Achievers MastermindGroup
can be found at:
www.MeaningfulGoals.com
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