birth of an alien

8/3/2019 Birth of an Alien

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(The Early Years – verse autobiography - BIRTH of an ALIEN)

The following three poems, or three parts of one poem, are of necessity laid out

consecutively; ideally (though impossibly) they should be read concurrently as each

covers much the same period of the same individuals life.



BIRTHOFAN ALIEN

Part One - SHADOWS

I was born -

unimaginably young -

to a backdrop of war

fought on a global scale.

Doodlebugs fledged their way

across the scene of my nativity -

I swear (a legacy

of wild imaginings)

I heard the engines stall

as death descended

plague-likefrom the sky.

Childhood and youth

were spent

in the shadow

of a mushroom cloud –

as if by miracle

our lives went on.

Remaining unconvinced

by the ‘deterrence’ lie -



and guided by the light

of ‘Spies for Peace -

I joined the siege of bunkers -

which did not exist

according to

the parliamentary line –

where those that govern

could survive

improbable attacks.

Loophole acknowledged -

their reasoning must be

to strike pre-emptively

and I declined

the opportunity –

disowned all those prepared

for genocide, became

an alien in my own land.

Malcolm Evison

11 - 13 May 2009



BIRTHOFAN ALIEN

Part Two–

LIGHT

Wrapped in a world full of love

whilst all around

was hate and fear -

(the enemy was thwarted

but not forgiven -

their future generations

would be tarnished

by the mark of Cain -

I failed to understand

that reasoning).

From my own comfort

rich in love

if not in pennies

I began to see

the world

through eyes

of others understanding -

took stands upon

my parents faith

reluctantly accepted

proscriptionsunknown to many

of my friends.

Sunday was decisively

the Lord's Day -



my father worked

being a preacher man -

my mother worked

looking after the family -

that was the day

I could not venture

out to play

with friends

whose parents

were otherwisepersuaded.

The radio was silent

save for the news

or hymn singing.

This was our Sabbath Day -

the would be sanctified

could only pray

for those proverbial sheep

so far astray -

it seemed

as if the second covenant

was made of rules

almost forgetting

the liberty of grace.

Malcolm Evison

14 May 2009



BIRTHOFAN ALIEN

Part Three – THE SCHOOL OF DOOM

A rebel prepared

for any cause

I traversed many

scenes but never found

my niche. I knew

from early teens

what I must be, but first

I must break free.

Eager to break the bonds

of school (a kind of punishment

for being young)

I dreamed my time away.

Moving from one school

to the next, never quite worked my way -

fell foul of alien traditions.

Compelled to join a company of snobs –

(a secondary punishment, once removed,

for my eleven-plus success) -teachers just failed

to understand the differing curriculum

from one part of the country

to the next; dismissed me

as unworthy of attention

when I couldn’t understand



their different scheme of things.

They made me hooker

in their rugby union game,

when all I knew was soccer

not the queer toffs routine -

no-one attempted to explain

the rules and I became

a victim, kicked and ground

down. The previous absence

of a swimming pool

ensured I never learned to swim,except against the tide -

they held me under

at the deeper end, then failed

to understand my trauma –

a baptism through drowning.

Loving to play with words

I soon lost patience

with the drill of prosody;where words for me

had always throbbed with life,

they squeezed out their last breath

and bound them in a shroud

of grammar. Music

to me was singing,

but others in the class

had learned to read

a simple score -

the music man interpreted

attendance at a different school

as ignorance, my forte thwarted

by a different scale



of learning, and a tyrant’s whim.

And these were meant to be

the best years of one’s life?

Even school trips, had I been able

to partake, were way beyond

my parents means; in fifties Britain -

skiing had never been a part

of our lifestyle scheme,

not even part of any dream –

I made excuses, skulked

in the background

as if ashamed of being poor –

I never left these shores.

Malcolm Evison

15/16 May 2009

birth of an alien

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