BULLIES ARE EVERYWHERE :Power Issues at Home, Work, and School

Part I: Theory

Stuart W. Twemlow, MDProfessor of Psychiatry

Baylor School of MedicineHouston, Texas

Bullies Are Everywhere

“Power Does Not Corrupt People, People Corrupt

Power”

Andre Gide

Bullies Are Everywhere

Bullies Will Only Do What Bystanders Allow………

Bullies Are Everywhere

Why Care About Bullies

• Bullying, Shame, and Humiliation Lead to Violence

• Bullying Reduces Achievement

• Creates Reactive Groups Rather Than Work Groups

• Reduces the Quality of Life in Communities, by Creating Special Interest Groups

Bullies Are Everywhere

The Circle of Power

ALL ROLES ARE CO-CREATED

FIXED ROLES ALL PEOPLE BECOME REPEATED VICTIM VICTIMIZER OCCUPY ALL PATTERNS ROLE ROLE ROLES AT DIFFERENT TIMES

ROLES ARE NOT DIAGNOSES

Bullies Are Everywhere

Power Dynamics Theory

• Power Dynamics Drive Individual and Group Behavior

• Power Dynamics are often an Unconscious

Trialectical RelationshipBully-VictimizerVictimBystander

Power’s Coerciveness Ranges from Everyday Insensitivities to Mass Murder

Bullies Are Everywhere

Social Context or Crucible

• Power is Enacted Socially within Contexts• Bystanders Are Causal Ingredients in Problem

Not Passive Observers• Power Conflicts Are Always Shifting• Coercion Evolves from Frozen Dynamics• Leader Can Be a Bully-Victim-Bystander• Climates Form Within Social Contexts• A Dysfunctional Social Context Impacts the

Individual

Bullies Are Everywhere

Bully Role: Victimizer

• Sadomasochistic Enjoyment of the Pain of Others

• Lacks Empathy

• Enjoys Dominant Status in Social Context

• Uses Humiliation to Improve Social Status

Bullies Are Everywhere

Bully Typology

• Sadistic: PsychopathicCold, Popular, Manipulates Others (Enron)

• Depressed: Bully’s Sidekick (homophilly)Unkempt, Socially Insecure, Attaches to

Sadistic Bully to Gain Status

• Bully - Victim: Bullies by Being a VictimClass Clown, Attracts Negative Attention,

Gains Power by Being a Victim

Bullies Are Everywhere

VICTIM ROLE

• Submissive

• Masochistic

• Driven to Please

• Rescue Driven

Bullies Are Everywhere

BYSTANDER ROLE

• The Audience for Public Humiliation

• Can Identify with Both Victim and Victimizer

• Humiliation is the Critical Ingredient

• Can Be an Individual or Group

Bullies Are Everywhere

BYSTANDER TYPOLOGY• Bully Bystander

Excited by Actions of the BullyCheers On or Laughs at Bully’s Shaming

• Victim BystanderSheepishly Looks On as Bully HumiliatesOffers Comfort only AFTERWARDS to Victim

• Abdicating BystanderUsually a System, Leader, or Governing BodyTakes No Action to Stop BullyBlames Others for the Problem

Bullies Are Everywhere

Redefining BullyingDYADIC

• Victim-victimizer primary focus

• Individual’s role as bully or victim is seen as fixed

• Audience is passive observer• Purely external/social definition• Bully-Victim are behavioral

roles

• Focus is on behavioral change• Intervention targets individuals

TRIADIC

• Social context of bully-victim-bystander (focus on bystander)

• Bully-Victim-Bystander roles co- created and in flux (always changing)

• Audience has an active role in violence

• Stress the role of unconscious power dynamics & processes

• Bully-Victim-Bystanders have complex combinations of roles & unconscious affiliations

• Focus is on Mentalizing• Intervention aimed at CLIMATE

Bullies Are Everywhere

Some BystandingRoles

VICTIM VICTIMIZER

Active roles Passive roles

DESTRUCTIVE BYSTANDING

HELPFUL BYSTANDING

•Bully Bystander

•Puppet master

•Sham

bystander

•Victim bystander

•Avoidant bystander

•Abdicating bystander

Peaceful Outcome

Violent Outcome

•Self Awareness

•Reflective Mindsets

•Accurate Reading of Others

•Impulsivity

•Concrete thinking

•Misread Danger signals