MISSION STATEMENTWhen a child dies, at any age, the family suffers intense pain and may feel hopeless and isolated. The Compassionate Friends provides highly personal comfort, hope, and support to every family experiencing the death of a son or a daughter, a brother or a sister, or a grandchild, and helps others better assist the grieving family.

P.O. Box 540852, Omaha, NE 68154 | 402.571.4011 | mail@tcfomaha.org facebook.com/tcfomaha www.tcfomaha.org

Werner Park Opportunity . . . . . 2

Book Report . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2

Walk to Remember . . . . . . . . . . 2

National Contact Info . . . . . . . . . 2

The Eternal Legacy of Names . . 3

Love Gifts . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4

Gone Fishing Poem . . . . . . . . . . 4

Birthdays & Anniversaries . . . . . 5

Authorization Form . . . . . . . . . . 6

National Conference . . . . . . . . . 6

Reimbursement Form . . . . . . . . 7

Meeting Times . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8

Important Dates . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8Electronic vs print? Please update us with your current emails and addresses, many are removed from our list every month because they are no longer deliverable.

You are not alone!

July 3 meeting will be back at New Cassel and

we will discuss major life changes within that

first year after your child died. There is a whole

list of things the experts advise a newly bereaved

parent shouldn’t do, and we will talk about why

that is. Everyone has their own path and has to

deal with it their own way. Additionally, we invite

all people attending to bring a dish for a potluck.

Table service and drinks provided.

National Office: The Compassionate Friends P.O. Box 3696 Oakbrook IL 60522-3696 | (877) 969-0010 | www.compassionatefriends.org

Nebraska Regional Coordinator: Kelly Pelster (402) 676-3670 tcfneb.kelly@gmail.com

“NIGHT ROAD” BY KRISTIN HANNAHThis book is a fiction but touches motherhood, identity, love and forgiveness. This is the story of Lexi who has experienced the uncertainty of being a foster child, twins Mia and Zach, their Mom Jude and a tragic night. This book takes you through friendship, love, pain, loss, and the long road to forgiveness.

I read this book initially because of the author, but felt that this book relates to the anger and pain we have all experienced as we go through our grief journey.

This book will be available in July to check out through our library, I have purchased this book in memory of my son Mark T. Massie.

—Sandi Massie, Mom of Mark Massie, TCF Omaha

Walk to RememberThe 2014 Walk to Remember banner will be present at chapter meetings. Add your child/grandchild/sibling’s name. The banner will be carried in local area walks, the National TCF Walk to Remember at the close of the national conference in July, and displayed at chapter meetings.

FREE PAGE FOR YOUR VIRTUAL WALK TO REMEMBERFor all those people who always wanted to help us… anything we need… but they don’t know what to do. This is how they can show support.

Your friends and family can donate in memory of your child.

Use your child’s name for your virtual walk team, and we will add all the children’s names to the chapter banner.

http://www.kintera.org/faf/home

Donate until July 12!

ANGEL OF HOPE DEDICATION AND LOCAL WALK TO REMEMBERComing up in September

Order bricks by Aug 30 to be placed in time for the dedication.

TCF NIGHT AT THE OMAHA STORM CHASERSJACKIE IS THROWING THE FIRST PITCH! at Werner Park on Tuesday August 19, 2014

Tickets are $7 in advance. To sit with the group, please let Jackie Sartan (tcfneb.jackie@gmail.com) know how many tickets you would like, no later than July 8th! Payments are required asap.*

Tickets purchased on game day will be regular price, $6-$16 and no guarantee you will be with the group.

Children 2 and under are free

Game starts at 7:05pm.

Gates open 90 minutes before game time.

*Checks payable to TCF. mail to TCF Omaha, PO Box 540852, Omaha NE 68154.

JULY/AUGUST 2014 TCF GREATER OMAHA CHAPTER PAGE 3

THE ETERNAL LEGACY OF NAMESby Nita Aasen

When people reference a deceased person, it is not unusual to hear his or her name referred to in the past tense. For example, upon learning that two of my sons are deceased, I have been asked “What were their names?” The hair immediately stands up on the back of my neck as I use the present tense and say(while trying to conceal my irritation), “Their names are Erik and David.”

While it is indisputable that death takes away the physical relationship with one’s loved one, death cannot take away the spiritual relationship we continue to have with them, nor can death take away their name. Their name becomes the living reference point for our relationship with them throughout their lives and following their deaths.

Upon a person’s birth (or perhaps before), the first gift one’s parents give to their newly born son or daughter is a name. In making that choice, different options for the first and middle names may be written out to see how they look with the last name. Or perhaps these names were spoken out loud in order to hear which combinations sounded the best. Many times it is important that a child’s name have a family connection. Much love, thought, and time are typically spent in choosing a name that gives one’s son or daughter a space and place in the world that is just for them.

From the very beginning of our lives, our names are linked eternally with a specific family. Over time, our names serve as an historical framework for our developmental progress, our medical records, school records, work performance, and leisure and civic interests. References to one’s personal characteristics, personality, reputation, character, and contributions to make this world a better place are inevitably linked to one’s name. There is simply no other efficient or meaningful way to make the connection. One’s name

becomes a kind of shorthand that serves as a starting point for conversations about an individual’s specific attributes.

Following a loved one’s death, his or her name makes it possible to continue to share stories, tributes, and memories; to plant trees, give awards, or do acts of kindness in their honor. Decades or even hundreds of years after an ancestor’s death, families wanting to connect with their family roots could not begin their search without a name. The documentation of one’s name available in numerous records—birth, death, marriage, church, cemetery, plat books, obituaries, pictures, old letters, and many more—connects descendants to other missing puzzle pieces and leads them to many other names and stories in their family tree.

A poem by John Rezmerski, professor at Gustavus Adolphus College, was written as a living tribute to the thousands of patients who were interred on the grounds of the state hospital for the “insane” in St. Peter, Minnesota. The graves were marked with numbers instead of names. More than a hundred years later, markers with names have gradually been placed above the numbers. Following is a portion of that poem:

A name is a seed that encases

a whole tree, the memory

of a whole species.

Our names say: “However different This individual is of our kind.” That kindness makes us whole.

As long as documentation exists, the kindness that is inherent in one’s name, and is symbolic of our loved ones, lives on eternally in this world. Yes, my sons’ names are Erik and David—forever.

Nita’s sons, Erik (27) and David (25), were killed in a car accident on November 14, 1994. She does not have a local chapter, but she has found support in TCF through We Need Not Walk Alone and the national conference.

JULY/AUGUST 2014 TCF GREATER OMAHA CHAPTER PAGE 4

received 4/1/2014 through 5/30/2014

General FundAnonymous

Beth Pribil William Carl Drieling My wonderful son, gone too soon. Love you forever. Mom.

Anonymous

Susan Baustian Jacinda Sue Baustian With all our love.

Angel of HopePatrick & Elizabeth Ackerman Eva Ackerman In memory of Eva Ackerman

Monica McKevitt - Hillside Elementary Staff Rueben D. Perez In memory of Rueben Perez, beloved Son of Jason Perez

Robb & Melissa Steffes Aaron James Ball Forever in our hearts, we miss you every day

Pat Querry Susan Querry Forever Loved - Forever Missed

OutreachDave & Susan Baustian Jacinda Sue Baustian We miss you Sissy.

GIFTS OF love There are no dues or fees to belong to The Compassionate Friends. Just as our chapter is run entirely by volunteers interested in furthering the work of TCF, your voluntary, tax-deductible donations make it possible for us to mail this newsletter, host memorial events, keep our website, and continue our participation in the TCF/National, and meet other chapter expenses. Often, as they find hope and healing within the group, parents make a contribution usually in memory of a child who has died or as a gift of thanksgiving for their surviving children.

These contributions are our only source of funds. It is a meaningful way to honor your children and we are grateful for your generous support.

Thank You!

GONE FISHINGI’m going fishing with someone very special To a very special fishing hole.

This Gentle Fisherman has made All the plans for me. It will be a fruitful trip.

I need no special gear Only His love. He doesn’t require much.

I haven’t always been Open to tell Him But He knew, I loved Him.

On this trip I will Be reminded of the Love I’ve shared with you

When they ask, “Where’s William Drieling? We haven’t seen him in a while.” Just say “Why – he’s gone fishing.”

by Beth Pribil mother of William Drieling

TCF Omaha

LOVE GIFTS

To protect the privacy of our members, this information has been removed from the pulic

version of the newsletter.

Please subscribe for a complete copy. mail@tcfomaha.org

JULY/AUGUST 2014 TCF GREATER OMAHA CHAPTER PAGE 5

OUR CHILDREN REMEMBERED In the days ahead, especially remember these children and their families…

SUN MON TUES WED THURS FRI SAT

july Birthdays / Anniversaries

1 2 3 4Matthew Hartmann

5 Dana Ray Herren

6Joseph S. Vazzano

7 Chris Cook

8 Leslie Helen Horn

9 10 11 Kevin Lee Schafer

12 Jace Lee Byrne Kaylie Faith Bousquet

13 14 15Rebecca Ann

Sullivan

16 17David Charles Arenz

Jace Lee Byrne

18 Mark Thomas

Massie Randy James

Nunez

19Matthew Applegate

20 21 Ashlynn Savannah

Davis

22 Devin Taylor

Johnson

23 24 25 26 David Charles

Arenz

27 Joel D. Kudym

Sara Jolene Potach Kozeny

28 29 30 Jeffery Francis Mall

31

SUN MON TUES WED THURS FRI SAT

august Birthdays / Anniversaries

1 2

3 4 5 6 7 Matthew Sherrett

Matthew James DaubenspeckIsabelle Thallas

Matthew James Daubenspeck

9

10 Steve W. Burhenne

11 Aaron James Rasmussen

12 Jonathon Scoob

Nielson

13 14 15 16

17 18 Michael

Chrapkowski

19 20 21 22 23 Luann Marie Miller

24Jacob Garren Coates

25Kaylie Faith

Bousquet

26 Regan Elise Sorben

27 28David J.

Riesberg, Jr.

29 30Regan Elise Sorben

31

To have your child’s name listed, please submit an authorization form on page 6 for 2014.

8

BIRTHDAY & ANNIVERSARY CALENDARS

To protect the privacy of our members, this information has been removed from the pulic version of the newsletter.

Please subscribe for a complete copy. mail@tcfomaha.org

JULY/AUGUST 2014 TCF GREATER OMAHA CHAPTER PAGE 6

2014 Authorization Initial each selection

Publish my child’s name/dates in the newsletter as long as I am on the mailing list.

Add my child’s name to the 2014 Walk to Remember Banner in my absence.

Use my child’s photo in the December 2014 Worldwide Candle Lighting Slide Show.

Newsletters and notices will be sent electronically unless paper is requested. Paper Unsubscribe

child’s name

birth date death date

your relationship

LOVE GIFTS · ADDRESS CHANGE · AUTHORIZATIONSMail to: The Compassionate Friends, PO Box 540852, Omaha, NE 68154

your name

address email

city state zip phone

credit card number

cvc expiration date today’s date

Gift of $

Direct my gift toward: General Fund Angel of Hope Outreach (printing, postage, phone, web)

In Memory of:

Message:

Register at http://www.compassionatefriends.org/News_Events/Conferences/National_

Conferences.aspx

The Omaha chapter will be offering reimbursement for registration ... see form on next page.

I'm There

Inside your

Heart

Right now I’m in a different placeAnd though we seem far apartI’m closer than I ever was…I’m there inside your heart

I’m with you when you grieve each dayAnd when the sun shines brightI’m there to share the sunsets, too…I’m with you every night

I’m with you when the times are good,To share a laugh or two,And if a tear should start to fall…I’ll still be there for you.

And when the day arrivesThat we no longer are apartI’ll smile and hold you close to me…Forever in my heart.

by Rushifurus Angel

JULY/AUGUST 2014 TCF GREATER OMAHA CHAPTER PAGE 7

APPLICATION FOR REIMBURSEMENT

name

address city state zip

phone email

Conference Workshops and dates attended: (please list)

You must attend at least 2 conference workshops per day, the candle lighting banquet, and the opening and closing ceremonies.

Chapter meeting dates attended: (please list)

You must attend at least 6 support group meetings of TCF Omaha Chapter from 2013-2014

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Share your experience

Write a short story or article about how the conference helped you, and be willing to pay it forward in some small way. Use the back of the paper.

Attending a Compassionate Friends Conference is a deeply rewarding and healing experience. The sense of community and love is overwhelming.

Hundreds of people want to hear about your child and care about your real feelings. Plan to attend, and share the power of compassion with another grieving parent.

http://www.compassionatefriends.org/News_Events/Conferences/National_Conferences.aspx

Inquire early to reserve your reimbursement (Limited number available.) Application for reimbursement ($90) must be submitted by Dec 1, 2014.

Registration, travel, hotel and meals are the responsibility of the applicant.

When all requirements have been met, return bottom portion with a copy of your conference badge to: TCF Omaha, PO Box 540852

Omaha NE 68154

JULY/AUGUST 2014 TCF GREATER OMAHA CHAPTER PAGE 8

Non-ProfitUS Postage

PAIDOmaha, NE

#284P.O. Box 540852 Omaha NE 68154-0852

MEETING TIMES AND LOCATIONFor parents, grandparents and siblings over 18

Omaha Support Group Meeting7:00 p.m. — 1st Thursday of the month

Fremont Support Group Meeting7:00 p.m. — 2nd Thursday of the month

New Cassel Retirement Center900 N 90th St, Omaha, NE

CALENDAR 2014

july S M T W T F S

1 2 3 4 56 7 8 9 10 11 1213 14 15 16 17 18 1920 21 22 23 24 25 2627 28 29 30 31

3rd Omaha Meeting10th Fremont Meeting22nd Steering Committee Meet

augu

st S M T W T F S1 2

3 4 5 6 7 8 910 11 12 13 14 15 1617 18 19 20 21 22 2324 25 26 27 28 29 3031

7th Omaha Meeting14th Fremont Meeting

Please send stories, poems or love gifts by August 1, 2014 to newsletter@tcfomaha.org

WE NEED NOT WALK ALONE. WE ARE THE COMPASSIONATE FRIENDS