CLERGY FAMILY HANDBOOK

JUNE 2011

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CONTENTS Housing 3

1 The Parsonage 4 2 The Curate House 9

Finance 11

1 Pay and Taxation 11 2 Self Assessment 12 3 Insurance 12 4 Expenses 13 5 Debt 13

Education (schools, grants etc) 17

1 Primary Education 17 2 Secondary Education (C of E Schools) 17 3 Secondary Education (Independent Schools) 18

Health 20

1 Illness 20 2 St Luke’s Hospital 20 3 Health Checks 21

Support for Clergy Spouses 22

1 Programme 22 Counselling 23

1 Confidential advice and support 23 2 Counselling for Parents 24 3 Separation and Divorce 25 4 The Bishop’s Visitor 26

Holidays and Retreats 27 Moving on 28

1 Loss on leaving a parish 28 2 Removals 28 3 Retirement 29

Death in Office (what to do etc) 32 Useful publications 33 Useful addresses and telephone numbers 32

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HOUSING The clergy house is first and foremost your home, for you and your family. You yourselves decide how it is to be used, even though it might have been used differently in the past. Remember it is the family home and we all need space, time and privacy. How to cope with callers at the door or on the telephone Clergy houses receive more callers than most, and can be a magnet for people with problems with which we may not be able to deal. It is important that our welcome is warm, but it is sensible never to let telephone callers or personal callers know if you are in the house on your own and never let strangers in. Never give money to casual callers, though consider using the DSS Out of Hours Service if such a request is made at night. Your spouse is not the unpaid curate, secretary or housekeeper and should not feel pressurised into taking on any particular duties in the parish. The priority should be your family and your spouses own job if they have one. A friendly and welcoming face at the vicarage door together with some simple hospitality are what most parishioners appreciate. Apart from these things you should do whatever you feel drawn to doing and give yourself time to discover what this is. However, it might be helpful if you knew who to contact in certain situations. It could be worth having pinned up by the phone, or somewhere handy, useful addresses and phone numbers. The following list may assist you Bishop Citizens’ Advice Bureau Archdeacon Department for Work and Pensions Rural Dean Police Deanery Contact Person Samaritans Churchwardens Victim Support Diocesan Office Social Services Domestic Violence Refuge Hospital And finally, a telephone answering machine can be a lifesaver!

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(1) THE PARSONAGE The Diocese is responsible for the provision, maintenance and insurance of the house through the Parsonages Committee. The care of your house is a joint venture between the Diocese and you. Essential repairs will be undertaken by the Diocese if at all possible, but funds may not be available for less urgent work. Park assistance either financial or practical is always welcome, although work undertaken should always be approved by the Diocesan Surveyor before it commences. (a) Quinquennial Surveys Every house is subject to a detailed survey every 5 years by the Diocesan Surveyor, who presents a report of his findings to the Parsonages Committee. A copy of the report is also sent to the incumbent. The Surveyor schedules the work detailed in the report, seeks tenders and arranges for the work to be carried out. You can make representations to the Committee if you feel the Surveyor’s report does not cover all the repairs you consider necessary, or if you wish any local contractor to be included in the tendering process. (b) Interim repairs From time to time other repairs will be necessary, which should be arranged through the Diocesan Surveyor who will either instruct a contractor to carry out the work, or will authorise the repairs to be dealt with locally. (c) Minor repairs Minor repairs anticipated to cost less than £50 may be put in hand without reference to the surveyors at the Diocesan Office, and reimbursement will be made if requested. (d) Emergencies In an emergency you should still contact the surveyors or, if out of normal working hours, contact a contractor direct to deal with the immediate problem. You should inform the Diocesan Surveyor at the earliest opportunity. If you do not know a suitable local contractor, or are unable to contact them, those listed below are known to us, and offer a 24 hour, 7 days a week emergency call out at a reasonable cost. We would suggest you avoid using unknown contractors.

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(e) Central Heating The Diocese has contracts with a number of heating engineers to carry out an annual service of your boiler, and also to carry out a gas safety check of the boiler and any gas fires. These same contractors should also be contacted in the case of a breakdown to your heating system. If you are unsure who your heating contractor is, or if you think a service is overdue, please contact the Diocesan Surveyor (f) Trees Trees listed on the quinquennial survey report may only be lopped or felled with the approval of the Parsonage Committee.

EMERGENCY TELEPHONE NUMBERS (to be contacted out of normal office hours or bank holidays)

Builders CONTRACTOR TELEPHONE

NUMBER CONTACT AREAS COVERED

J A Childs

0208 468 7877 (mobile 07951 204399)

John Childs

Based in Bromley, but will cover most areas of the Diocese

S Smith & Sons Builders Ltd

01732 354345 Paul Smith Based in Tonbridge and will cover areas within that vicinity

PJM Crayford Ltd

07966 531177 Jeff Hough Based in Crayford, but will cover most areas of the Diocese

Ross Bros Construction Ltd

07967 713410 Andy Ross Based in Gillingham, will cover Medway Towns and up to Gravesend/Dartford

Calmore Construction

0208 290 1545 David Moore Based in Bromley, will cover Bromley/Beckenham area

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Electricians CONTRACTOR TELEPHONE

NUMBER

CONTACT AREAS COVERED

Lyons Electrical 01634 290000 Gordon or Simon

Based on Medway City Estate, will cover all Medway and other areas of diocese

DWS Electrical 07515 509637 David Singer Based in Welling, will cover that area, Bromley, Bexley and Medway

G B Maintenance

07847 724784 Graham Bristow

Based in Dartford area, will cover that area and most of diocese for both plumbing and electrics

Plumbers CONTRACTOR TELEPHONE

NUMBER

CONTACT AREAS COVERED

G B Maintenance

07847 724784 Graham Bristow

Based in Dartford area, will cover that area and most of diocese for both plumbing and electrics

Green Tap Plumbing

07876 800975 Ian Crisp Base in Orpington, but will cover most of diocese

G Peachey Plumbing & Heating

01634 865 888 Graham Peachey

Based in Medway will cover mostly Medway

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Boiler Servicing CONTRACTOR TELEPHONE

NUMBER CONTACT AREAS COVERED

Stevenson Heating*

0208 4628822

Kevin Crozier

Based in Bromley, will Bromley/Bexley area

GasCo 01634 294446 Steve Colley Based in Strood and will cover areas within Gravesend/Dartford/Cobham/Malling

P D Plumbing 01634 328800 Paul Kramer Covers the Medway Towns

Charles Calvert 01892 532254 Janet Calvert Cover Tunbridge Wells, Paddock Wood

J V Geer & Sons

01732 454082 Sue Cover Sevenoaks, Tonbridge, Shoreham

G Peachey Plumbing & Heating

01634 865 888 Graham Peachey

Based in Medway will cover mostly Medway

OUT OF NORMAL HOURS STEVENSON HEATING ADVISE THAT A MESSAGE SHOULD BE LEFT ON THEIR ANSWER MACHINE AND AN ENGINEER WILL THEN CONTACT YOU AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. Miscellaneous CONTRACTOR TELEPHONE

NUMBER

CONTACT AREAS COVERED

Drains Hydro Descaling

01634 – 867297

Roger Sellar Based in Chatham but covers most of diocese

Trees Quality Tree Care Ltd

01474 704748 Keven Watt Based in Longfield, will travel to most of diocese

Down to Earth 01959 524623 Based in Shoreham but will go to most of diocese

Glass Bell Glass & Glazing

01634 377776 Alan Bell Based in Rainham but will travel to most of diocese

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Fencing Peter Rayfield

01634 371367 Peter Rayfield

Based in Rainham but will travel to most of diocese

Wasps Cleankill Or try your respective local council

0800 0565477 (freecall 0500 821324)

Will travel to all of diocese

(g) Improvements Any work undertaken to improve or upgrade the parsonage house must have the approval of the Parsonages Committee. The Committee has a very limited sum of money available for grants towards such work, so parishes are usually expected to fund the cost of the improvements to enable the limited monies to be used where most needed. (h) Diocesan Surveyor The Property Team is based in the Diocesan Office and the Diocesan Surveyor and Assistant Diocesan Surveyor are there to help you. They will be pleased to advise if you have any problem with your house. If in doubt please feel free to ask. (i) Sub-letting You should not sub-let any part of the parsonage house under any circumstances or grant any rights of way without first consulting the Diocesan Secretary. It can lead to serious difficulties if not handled correctly. In practice, many sub-tenancies in parsonage houses are established inadvertently by allowing friends or others to occupy a part of the house in response to some urgent plea. In these circumstances you should, on no account, receive money, either as a direct payment or towards the cost of heat and light, or it may be construed as the payment of rent and a legal tenancy will be created. (j) Interior decorations Ongoing interior redecoration is your responsibility, but parishes are encouraged to assist wherever possible. Many incumbents find it convenient to have a programme of interior decorations whereby at least one room is redecorated

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each year and the PCC is encouraged to assist if possible. Some grants may be available in exceptional circumstances. You are responsible for ensuring the house is left in an appropriate condition should you move on. Failure to do so may mean that you will be charged by the DBF for costs incurred in putting things right. (k) Smoke detectors Two detectors, one on each floor, are recommended, one to be fitted with any emergency light. Battery operated units, as found in most DIY shops are adequate. The cost of this provision, as with all improvements, will need to be met by the PCC. (l) Security The Diocese is keen to ensure the security of its clergy and their families and the Diocesan Surveyor will be happy to offer guidance if requested. Fitting of Burglar Alarms requires the consent of the Parsonage Committee and the total cost of the installation, together with ongoing maintenance, will need to be funded by the parish. Small grants may be available in exceptional circumstances. (2) THE CURATE HOUSE A curate house may be the property of the PCC, The Diocesan Board of Finance, or jointly owned by the two. Occasionally the property will be rented from a third party. In the case of PCC or DBF ownership the maintenance and insurance of the property is the responsibility of the PCC. The property should be of a minimum standard and well maintained. The Diocesan Surveyor is able to advise on the minimum standard that is acceptable. If you have any queries (e.g. repairs, tree lopping) these should, in the first instance be discussed with the incumbent who may then seek advice from the Diocesan Surveyor. All curate houses must be in the Church Repair Fund. The cost of heating and lighting is the responsibility of the Curate but the Inland Revenue will allow it as a tax concession. A form will need to be completed annually and the curate’s tax code is adjusted automatically. Insurance of the contents and liability for third parties is the responsibility of the curate.

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When a new appointment is accepted, it is important to have a clear understanding, in writing, of the following points

(a) Who is responsible for repairs, decorations (inside and out) (b) To whom should requests for repairs be referred (c) To whom should bills be sent for payment

Grants are made when moving to a new appointment and enquiries about such should be made to the Diocesan Office. The curate is responsible for ensuring the house is left in an appropriate condition when moving on. Failure to do so may mean that they are charged by the DBF for costs incurred in putting things right. Should problems arise concerning the housing and they are unable to be resolved with the parish, then the Archdeacon may be able to help.

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FINANCE General Points Some of the following points will be obvious, but they are useful as a check list. (a) Official forms are important. If they are not completed and returned

promptly there may be consequences such as full stipend not being paid or too much income tax may be deducted

(b) Read the pamphlets produced by the Church Commissioners and the

Pensions Board (see list in Appendix ?) (c) Even if you think you have nothing to leave, make a Will. It is quite easy to

do, relatively inexpensive and of great benefit to your family. You should consult a solicitor

(d) Think seriously about taking out a Life Assurance Policy if you have not

already done so (e) All securities, deeds, wills and other important should be kept in a safe

place, and some responsible person other than you and your spouse should know where to find them

(f) A car loan scheme is run by the Church Commissioners. Details can be

obtained from the Finance Team at the Diocesan Office (01634 560000). Interest is currently charged at 5% per annum

(g) Many clergy acquire a house some years before retirement. Any person

owning a house should seek approval/agreement of the Tax Inspector to consider the house as exempt from Capital Gains tax should it ever be let. If you should let your property it is essential than an appropriate letting agreement is drawn up to ensure that you are able to regain possession if things go wrong. Any rents received must be declared on your annual tax return. There is a concession for clergy living in tied accommodation who own a second home. Usually only 50% of the tax is payable but you should verify this the Local Authority in which the second home is situated.

(1) PAY AND TAXATION (h) The stipend will be received by monthly instalments paid into your

nominated bank account by the Church Commissioners. Income tax and National Insurance contributions are deducted at source. The stipend level

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is determined by the parish within the overall policy set by the Diocesan Stipends Committee

(i) Curates are paid on a scale which is reviewed annually. Increments are due on the anniversary of ordination until the 4th scale point is paid, after which the stipend can be reviewed by the Diocesan Stipends Committee

(j) Incumbents’ stipends are also reviewed each year with effect from 1st April. The Diocesan Minimum Stipend is always more than the minimum recommended b the Central Stipends Authority but in some cases, unlike a curate’s stipend, it may not all be receivable through the Church Commissioners’ monthly payment. For example fees for undertaking chaplaincy duties all count toward the basic stipend. Although some clergy still receive direct fees for weddings and funerals, most are now assigned to the diocese so that they can be included in the monthly payment from the Commissioners. For further information contact the Diocesan Finance Team (01634 560000)

(k) The PCC is responsible for meeting the Council Tax liability on houses occupied by the clergy. Accounts will normally be sent to the property to which it relates and you should pass them to the PCC for payment.

(l) The tax district which deals with the Church Commissioners’ “payroll” is NE3, Wadley House, 25 Little Horton Lane, Bradford, West Yorks. BD5 OTZ (01274 777444) and the PAYE reference is 929/C16. You may find it beneficial to employ a financial adviser. Some advisers specialise in clergy taxation so it might be helpful to make enquiries.

(m) Shortly before the end of the stipends year a Church Commissioners’ form (PSA/PUN) will be received on which you should enter details of local income received (fees, Easter Offerings etc), expenses incurred and how they were reimbursed, the cost of heating lighting and cleaning your house. It is very important that this form is completed and returned to the Diocesan Office promptly. This will ensure you receive the appropriate tax relief and you may pay too much tax until the form is returned

(n) You may be aware that it is possible to claim certain expenses against tax (e.g. washing of surpluses, maintenance of robes, clerical assistance and the cleaning of the house). It is important that the payment made, for every item for which there is a claim, should be at a reasonable rate for the job.

(2) SELF ASSESSMENT Clergy should refer to their financial adviser or accountant. The Church Commissioners have issued advice to clergy regarding self-assessment and a copy of this can be obtained from them. (3) INSURANCE

(a) Life Assurance There is a National Term Assurance Scheme whereby the dependent of a scheme member who dies in office under the age of 75 receives an immediate lump sum. This sum will vary from year to year as stipends

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alter, as the sum is calculated approximately on 3 times the previous year’s national minimum stipend for incumbents. (b) House Insurance All parsonage houses are covered by a policy effected by the Parsonage Committee with the Ecclesiastical Insurance Office. There is cover for damage caused by malicious persons, but this cover is limited if a particular house is vacant at the time the damage is caused. Provision is made for third-party liability cover for which the incumbent may be legally liable as owner, but not as occupier. Please inform the Diocesan Surveyor as soon as possible of any accidental damage to your house. (c) House Contents The incumbent is responsible for making arrangements to insure the personal contents of the house and should ensure that his policy makes provision for third party cover as occupier. Any points arising under this heading or in connection with anything affecting the fabric of the house should be referred to the Diocesan Surveyor 01634 560000 (d) Advice on Insurance Advise is available from any major insurance company but many clergy families insure with the Ecclesiastical Insurance Group 01452 528533 (4) EXPENSES All parochial clergy should have their proper expenses reimbursed in full by the PCC. They are not perks, but a part of the cost of carrying out the work. Some PCCs suggest that a lump sum be paid to cover all expenses, but this is unsatisfactory because actual expenses still have to be justified to the Inspector of Taxes and you could be liable for tax on the sum received. You are advised to make a monthly claim to the PCC Treasurer and a pro forma for doing this can be obtained from the Diocesan Office. The main items of reimbursable parochial expenses include postage; stationery; telephone; secretarial assistance; office equipment; maintenance of robes; hospitality; travelling expenses. A booklet entitled “The Parochial Expenses of the Clergy” is published by the Central Stipends Authority, Ministry Division,

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Church House, Great Smith Street, London SW1P 3AZ (0207 898 1792). Agreement should be reached with the PCC as to the true costs of all expenses and how they are to be met. The booklet also deals with circumstances in which payments can properly be made to a spouse. Curates will not incur the same level of expenses as an incumbent, but it is important, at the start of an appointment for a curate to find out exactly how his expenses will be dealt with i.e. what do they cover, how are claims to be made. The level of such expenses is to be agreed with the incumbent, who will see that you are reimbursed. (5) DEBT It is easy to think of debt as something that happens to other people’s families. Unfortunately, with the small margins on a clergy stipend and the ease with which quite large debit balances can accrue to banks, credit card companies and so on, debt can appear quite unexpectedly. When it does, it seems somehow to resist all efforts to reduce it, and to grow a little larger month by month. The Archdeacons are not unfamiliar with this, and are well placed to try to help. But if they are to be able to do so, it is Important that they are consulted sooner rather than later before mattes have gone beyond recall. Their experience and practical help have already made all the difference to other families faced with this kind of anxiety. With the present level of clergy stipends, unexpected expense can sometimes cause hardship. You should not bear this alone but contact the Bishop who has a small discretionary fund at his disposal. For larger or longer term grants, the following charities are helpful. If you apply directly they may require the Bishop’s of Diocesan Secretary’s endorsement. Sons of the Clergy Corporation 1 Dean Trench Street London SW1P 3HB Tel: 020 7799 3696 http://www.sonsoftheclergy.org.uk Friends of the Clergy Corporation 27 Medway Street London SW1P 2BD 020 7799 3696 The Foundation of Edward Storey Storey’s House Mount Pleasant Cambridge CB3 0BZ (01223) 364405 info@edwardstorey.org.uk Society for the Relief of Poor Clergymen c/o Unit 3 Sovereign Court Road University of Warwick Science Park

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Coventry CV4 7EZ 0796 2227959 secretary@srpc-aid.com The Warrington Institutions for the Relief of Widows and Orphans The Rev Canon J O Colling The Rectory Warrington WA1 2TL 01925 635020 The Clergy Orphan Corporation 57b Tufton Street Westminster SW1P 3QL The English Clergy Association The Rev J Masding MA LLM The Old School House Norton Hawkfield Nr Pensford Bristol BS39 4HB 01275 830017 benoporto-eca@yahoo.co.uk www.clergyassoc.co.uk The Curate’s Augmentation Fund c/o Friends of the Clergy Corporation (as above) Richard Milne’s Charity The Diocesan Secretary Diocesan Board of finance 90 Deangate Manchester M3 2GH 0161 828 1400 http://www.manchester.anglican.org Mrs Frances Ashton’s Charity c/o Mrs G Fowle Beech House Woolston North Cadbury Somerset BA22 7BJ 07775 717606 francesashton@hotmail.co.uk Application forms from Charities Aid Foundation Rustat Fund (for education only of clergy children) c/o The Dean Jesus College Cambridge CB5 8BL 01223 339438 chaplain@jesus.cam.ac.uk Newton’s Trust (Widows and unmarried daughters of deceased clergy) Chapter Office

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19a The Close Lichfield Staffs WS13 7LD 01543 306100 www.lichfield-cathedral.org Dr Plume’s Trust (For support of clergy in Dartford and Gravesend Deaneries) 33 Pembury Way Rainham ME8 7DL 01634 362107

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EDUCATION (1) PRIMARY EDUCATION There are 60 church controlled and 24 church aided primary schools in the Diocese of Rochester. If clergy families would like to send their young children to a church controlled or aided school, they should contact the Diocesan Director of Education at The Diocesan Office (01634 560000). The Director will be able to provide details of schools in the area in which you are living. (2) SECONDARY EDUCATION (Church of England

Schools) There are 4 Church of England secondary schools in the Diocese and 1 Academy. Bennett Memorial Diocesan School VA Mixed Culverden down Tunbridge Wells TN4 9SH 01892 521595 www.bennett.kent.sch.uk St George’s C of E Secondary School GM Mixed Meadow Road Gravesend DA11 7LS 014474 533082 www.saintgeorgescofe.kent.sch.uk Trinity VA Mixed The Oaks Erith Road Belvedere DA17 6HT 01322 441371 www.trinity.bexley.sch.uk St Olave’s GM School Goddington Lane Orpington BR6 9SH 01689 820101 www.saintolaves.net The Bishop of Rochester Academy East Campus Magpie Hall Road Chatham ME4 5JB

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01634 845196 http://www.boracademy.org (Students Y10 and Y11) West Campus Letchworth Avenue Chatham ME4 6NT (Student Y7, Y8, Y9, Y12 and Y13) (3) SECONDARY EDUCATION (Independent) (a) Independent schools with which the Diocese has some relationship include

King’s School, Rochester (b) For information about independent schools that offer bursaries to clergy

children

Write to The Independent Schools Information Service for London & S.E. (ISIS), 3 Vandon Street, London SW1H 0AN (telephone number unavailable)

look in the public library for the Handbook of Grant Making Trusts and Charities

Contact the Gabbitas Educational Consultants Carrington House, 126 - 130 Regent Street, London W1B 5EE (0207 734 0161) www.gabbitas.co.uk

(c) ICAN 8 Wakley Street, London EC1V 7QE (0845 225 4071 or 0207 843 2510) www.ican.org.uk provide schooling for children with speech disorders

(d) For children over 11 years in both private and maintained sectors of education, the Corporation of the Sons of the Clergy may be approached to help with the provision of school fees and clothing; school travel and trips of an educational nature; musical instruments and lessons

The Corporation may also assist with school fees when clergy children need to go to independent schools for special reasons (egg the LEA cannot provide for the child’s needs)

The Friends of the Clergy Corporation will assist with primary school clothing (under the age of 11). Grants may also be made for students in further education and for pre-school clothing.

Both these organizations will advise on grants for children with special needs.

(e) The Rustat Fund will also assist with the expense of education for clergy

children. The address to write to is: The Rustat Fund c/o The Dean, Jesus College, Cambridge CB5 8BL 01223 339438 chaplain@jesus.cam.ac.uk

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(f) It is possible to obtain LEA grants to educate children at home in

exceptional circumstances. Contact your LEA for further information (g) Other charities that may be willing to assist with school fees The Royal Asylum of St. Ann’s Society The Secretary King Edward’s School Witley, Petworth Road, Wormley Godalming, Surrey GU8 5SG 01428 686700 The Buttle Trust & Reynolds Trust (Single parent and family adoption) Audley House 13 Palace Street London SW1E 5HS 0207 828 7311 buttlehq@buttle.dircon.co.uk www.buttletrust.org The Professional Classes Aid council 10 St Christopher’s Place London W1M 6HY 0207 935 0641 www.pcac.org.uk The Reynolds Trust (For help with Further and Higher education) Audley House 13 Palace Street London SW1E 5HS 0207 828 7311 The Thornton-Smith Young People’s Trust (Ages 13-25) The Secretary Mrs H Coxx 298 Icknield Way Luton Beds 01582 611675 20 7935 0641 020 7935

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HEALTH (1) ILLNESS When illness occurs and you are unable to carry out duties, it is important that the following are informed without delay (a) The Rural/Area Dean The Rural/Area Dean, with the Churchwardens will arrange for clergy duties to be covered if there is no assistance on the church team. The Rural/Area Dean will inform the Bishop and your Archdeacon so that there can be care and prayer (this applies also when a member of the clergy family is ill). The Rural/Area Dean will inform the Dean so that there can be prayer at the Cathedral services (unless the incumbent and family do not want the illness to be “public” (b) The Churchwardens The Churchwardens, with the Rural/Area Dean will arrange for duties to be covered (c) The Church Commissioners When illness occurs for more than 3 days the Church Commissioners should be informed on their form for Statutory Sick Pay (SSP1). This form is in two parts, the second part is to be completed upon recovery. One of these forms should be held in readiness for such an occurrence, however one can be obtained by telephone the Central Stipends Authority on 0207 898 1746 This form can be downloaded from http://www.cofe.anglican.org/info/clergypay/sc02 (d) The Diocesan Office It is important that the office is notified for redirection of parish post when necessary. The stipend will continue to be paid, but if your sickness absence beyond the period for self certification you should ask your doctor for a “wellness certificate” and this should be forwarded to the Diocesan Office. The stipend will continue to be paid but reference must be made to the advice given by the Office or the Church Commissioners especially if sickness is prolonged.

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The Bishop can sometimes obtain financial help towards convalescence. He welcomes requests of this kind and clergy should never hesitate to ask. Also the Friends of the Clergy Corporation sometimes assists with medical, dental, optical and convalescence expenses. (2) ST LUKE’S HEALTHCARE FOR THE CLERGY St Luke's is still continuing to serve the clergy community through its network of Honorary Consultants. At present this network is mainly London based, except in the area of psychiatry and psychology where there is a more local network. http://www.stlukeshealthcare.org.uk/ St. Luke's has prided itself in provides free healthcare to the Clergy of the Anglican Communion, active and retired, stipendiary and non stipendiary, their spouses, widows/widowers and any dependent children. They also care for members of recognised monastic and conventual orders, active and retired Deaconesses, active and retired overseas missionaries and Clergy as well as Theological students and those licensed by a Bishop. The Honorary Consultants offer free consultations to all clergy patients, if treatment is required following the consultation this is either carried out at the Consultants NHS hospital, if appropriate, or it is referred back to the local NHS practice. Unfortunately St Luke's does not have enough funds to enable private treatment. Referrals should be sent to the Medical Secretary, Room 201, Church House, Great Smith Street, London SW1P 3AZ (0207 898 1700) (3) HEALTH CHECKS

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SUPPORT FOR CLERGY SPOUSES (1) PROGRAMME The particular nature of the work of the clergy (using the home as a work place, being in the public eye etc) means that the support that can be provided is very important. One of the ways in which support is given in the Diocese is a programme of events arranged each year, at a diocesan level for the spouses of the clergy. This programme is co-ordinated through a team of senior clergy spouses and they will make contact with you at an early stage when you move into the Diocese. All spouses are most welcome, usually about 20 – 30 meet together. A variety of events are arranged - Quiet Days (quiet, but lots of time for talking too!), a 3 day residential retreat in France every couple of years or so, events for the whole family, informal “Open House” drop ins etc. The group members seek to support each other in our unique role as clergy spouses. Male and female spouses at all “stages” of ministry are involved. You may want to come to one or more of the events, or at certain times and not others. Many value friendships begun at these events and built up over the years. We fully understand that you may not wish to attend – it is not obligatory. (2) PASTORAL CARE AND COUNSELLING An arrangement has been set up for Burrswood Christian Hospital to offer a counselling service for clergy spouses. The Team at Burrswood will be the first point of contact if you are seeking support, and they will undertake an initial assessment and then allocate a counsellor as necessary. All counsellors are members of the British Association of Counsellors and Psychotherapists and are aligned with Burrswood’s Christian values. Often an approach will be made with the full knowledge and encouragement of your archdeacon or a bishop. However you are free to approach Burrswood without a bishop or your archdeacon being aware. In such cases of self-referral a maximum of six sessions will be paid for without reference to anyone else; thereafter agreement will be needed between Burrswood and the Bishop of Rochester.

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COUNSELLING (1) CONFIDENTIAL ADVICE AND SUPPORT At some point you, or a member of your immediate family, may need someone to whom you can turn for totally confidential advice and support, or a listening ear, on a wide range of matters. These could include a sense of isolation and depression, strain in marriage, anxiety about children, money difficulties or spiritual issues. Counselling and marital counselling can be very helpful to people at particular times of stress in their lives, and is considered of great value and importance within the Diocese. The sooner any sense of crisis or difficulty is faced, the greater the opportunity for positive resolution. One of your initial problems may be that of not knowing what to do or where to go for help. If you need help you can contact the Head of Counselling at Burrswood Hospital. 01892 863637. An arrangement is currently in place that you can, through Burrswood Hospital, access 6 sessions of counselling on a free, confidential basis. Should you require additional counselling sessions these will be on a fee basis and funding for this may be available through the Bishop’s Chaplain. Great care is taken to ensure confidentiality between counsellor and client. Other agencies which may be able to offer help St Luke’s Hospital for the Clergy (See page ?) Relate South Regional Office 42 Homesdale Road Reigate Surrey RH2 0BX To find your nearest Relate service www.relate.org.uk/find-your-nearest-service/index.html The Tavistock Centre 120 Belsize Lane London NW3 5BA 0207 435 711 www.tavistockandportman.nhs.uk The Westminster Pastoral Foundation (WPF) 23 Magdalen Street London SE1 2EN 0207 378 2000 www.wpf.org.uk

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The Institute of Family Therapy 24-32 Stephenson Way London NW1 2HX 020 7391 9150 www.instituteoffamilytherapy.org.uk The Society of Martha and Mary The Sheldon Centre Dunsford Exeter, Devon EX6 7LE 01647 52752 www.sheldon.uk.com Cruse Bereavement Care Cruse House 126 Sheen Road Richmond Surrey TW9 1UR Help Line 0844 477 9400 To find your local branch www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk/LocalCruse.html You may also like to contact Medway Towns’ Counselling Service 01634 828484 Orpington Christian counseling Service 01689 852105 Maidstone Counselling Service 0800 756 6236 Sevenoaks Christian Counselling 01732 450118 Bromley Community Counselling Service 0208 460 7711 0208460 11 Emmaus Counselling, Tunbridge Wells 01892 861160 In some circumstances you may find it helpful to look beyond the Diocese and it may be possible to find you help in the Southwark, Chelmsford or Canterbury Dioceses. (2) COUNSELLING FOR PARENTS Parents often go through a period of difficulty as their children grow up. Most of these periods pass and are, with hindsight, written off as part of the growing process. But sometimes a child’s disruptive behaviour or unhappiness is a matter for deep concern for the parents. And when it is the Vicarage family that is in trouble, the pressure can become intense. It is easy for the child to be labelled as “the problem”. Before things become too entrenched and parents lose their confidence or patience, it can be very worthwhile for them to review with a suitable counsellor their own approach to the problem. Sometimes it is necessary for a child to receive help in his or her own right.

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If your family has a problem, you are urged to contact the Diocesan Adviser in Pastoral Care and Counselling. (See the online Diocesan Directory for contact details). Where there is concern for a child or when help is needed with child protection issues, you should contact the Bishop’s Adviser for Safeguarding Children and Vulnerable Adults. The Adviser can be contacted through the Safeguarding Administrator based at the Diocesan Office. 01634 560000 (3) SEPARATION AND DIVORCE If you feel the stresses building up, it really is better to talk it through with someone sooner rather than later; either between yourselves or with a friend on whose confidence you can rely. But it you feel that something may be seriously wrong, there are other people who can help: a Relate Counsellor, a nearby priest, the Rural/Area Dean, a clergy spouse with long experience or parish life, or a doctor. Try not to leave it until the situation has deteriorated almost beyond repair. This can be difficult, particularly for clergy couples. The Christian standard of life-long marriage can mean that couples won’t face the fact that something may be wrong until it is almost too late. The feelings of failure, embarrassment, shame, fear – and many others that may arise when the news leaks out to the parish that all is not well, may mean that you put off seeking help. If you should suffer the personal tragedy of a marriage breakdown, you will need a lot of practical help and personal support. The Bishops will help all they can and their wives are also ready to be a listening ear whenever that is needed. The Archdeacons can also offer sympathetic and practical help. In addition, as has been mentioned before, the list of useful contacts can give you support in times of crisis. One of the major problems arises from the fact that you and your spouse have been living in a “tied house”. The Bishop and Archdeacon will be able to advise you about finding a new home, and also about the legal position, pension rights and possible sources of financial help if needed. You may also wish to inform the Communications Department (01634 560000) as they will help and support you and your family through this time which may attract the interest of local or national media. It is better to do this at an early stage rather than wait until you have journalists camped on your front door step and intruding on your private life. “Broken Rites” is an independent, interdenominational organisation which exists to support clergy wives through times of crisis. Counselling and practical advice are also offered. www.brokenrites.org

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(4) THE BISHOP’S VISITOR The role of the Bishop’s Visitor is to act on behalf of the Bishop, to show care and concern for the clergy spouse at the time of a marriage break-up. The referral comes from the Bishop and the role is mainly a practical one. As well as being concerned for the spouse’s spiritual and emotional well-being, the Visitor is able to advise couples as to the appropriate conciliation/mediation services which may exist in their area and to help with issues of access and shared parental responsibility. They are able, in partnership with the Diocesan Secretary, to provide information on housing needs and finance. The Bishop’s Visitor can be contacted through The Bishop’s Chaplain (01634 814439) or your Archdeacon. The following organisations may be able to offer financial help for the separated or divorced Sons of the Clergy Corporation 1 Dean Trench Street London SW1P 3HB Tel: 020 7799 3696 http://www.sonsoftheclergy.org.uk Those separated:

Help with maintenance of children including grants for education Removal grants in certain circumstances Assistance with financial problems

Those divorced:

Assistance for dependant children The Foundation of Edward Storey Storey’s House Mount Pleasant Cambridge CB3 0BZ (01223) 364405 info@edwardstorey.org.uk The Bishop may be able to give financial help for specific needs, but not on a regular income basis. 20 7935 0641 020 7935 The Diocesan Secretary, in conjunction with the Bishop’s Visitor, can offer guidance regarding re-housing.

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HOLIDAYS AND RETREATS The Bishop encourages all clergy to have:

Holidays which should include not less than five Sundays off in the year, including a break after Christmas and Easter

Some form of annual retreat or time for reflection lasting three to four days and

A particular day off each week which, if possible should include the previous evening and clergy should take steps to see that the parish is aware that they are unavailable on that day. There should also be time during the week which is set aside for further study.

Where necessary other clergy in the Deanery should be asked to cover for funerals, weddings, Sunday services and emergencies. The Rural/Area Dean may be able to help with this. Some money is available to assist with holidays or retreats and requests should be made to the Bishop. Sabbaticals should initially be discussed with the Director of Ministry and Training. Contact details can be found on the on-line Diocesan Directory or through 01634 560000. A list of holiday accommodation is available from The Christian Holiday Handbook http://www.christianvacationtravel.com The Friends of the Clergy Corporation have some self-catering holiday flats at Eastbourne, Sussex and may be able to help with holiday grants. The Friends of the Clergy Corporation 27 Medway Street London SW1P 2BD 020 7799 3696 Some Mothers’ Union branches have caravans and sometimes families or a parent on his/her own can stay with Mothers’ Union members for “away from it all breaks”. Contact details for the Rochester Mothers’ Union can be obtained from the Diocesan Office 01634 560000.

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MOVING ON (1) LOSS ON LEAVING A PARISH Although we may have to leave parishes several times, it is an aspect of ministry which receives little attention. Nevertheless, the effects on those we love and our relationship with them, our future ministry and the welfare of the parishes we leave behind can be profound. Parishioners can often feel abandoned and betrayed and doubt we ever cared for them. Problems can be minimised if we do not rush through the time between resigning and leaving. Being overly busy can lead us to a neglect of our own feelings and the sense of loss and pain being felt by the parishioners, as well as their anxieties for the future. Nor should we act like a “sponge” for other people’s feelings, in case we enter the next phase of ministry depressed, lacking in energy or doubting the wisdom of moving. We should, however, be open with others about our own feelings and be willing to listen to them about how they feel about our departure and its implications for them. (2) REMOVALS It is vital that you inform both the Bishop and the diocesan Office when you resign your post to move to another Diocese. A When you leave It is your responsibility to leave the house clean and empty and to see that all rubbish is cleared from the premises. Failure to do so may mean that you will be charged by the DBF for costs incurred in putting things right. Fixtures are the property of the benefice and must be left in the house. Passing on curtains, carpets etc to your successor is a private matter. In some parishes the PCC will have purchased the hall and stair carpets for the house and so, of course, they remain. Please do not have services disconnected (gas, electricity and telephone) as it costs money and can cause inconvenience to have them reconnected, and they will probably be required in the interregnum. Have the meters read before you leave so you know the extent of your liability for gas and electricity. When you inform British Telecom of your departure, please include the following paragraph in your letter “This house is a parsonage house and in due course will be occupied by a new incumbent. I formally request that the present telephone number be

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retained for this use. This is necessary as the number is widely known and is quoted in many official directories.” It would also be helpful to discuss with the Diocesan Surveyor any known defects in the house. It would be beneficial to the next occupier if you left a list of useful addresses of your current arrangements for window cleaner, chimney sweep etc. together with details of the location of the stopcock. An estimate of how much the fuel costs have been over the last twelve months would also assist the new occupant when filling in the estimates on the heating, lighting and cleaning return. B On moving When you move to another diocese, that diocese will be responsible for your removal expenses. When the move is into or within the Diocese of Rochester, this Diocese pays the removal bill. The removal will be carried out in accordance with our corporate contract. Contact the Diocesan Office for more details (01634 560000) C On appointment to a living You will be given an opportunity to discuss with the Diocesan Surveyor and the parish representatives the work of improvements (if any) you feel need to be carried out at the parsonage house to meet your particular requirements. Approval of such works will be given only if the work is appropriate and affordable to the Diocese. (3) RETIREMENT Thinking about and preparing for retirement should start a long time before the event. It is essential that both of you face, quite realistically, the inevitable changes, gains and losses, etc, that retirement brings. It is advisable to contact the Retirement Officer (see above) when you are considering retirement. S/he will explain the pension entitlement and help with advice about your housing options. Contact details can be obtained from the Diocesan Office (01634 560000) The Director of Training arranges residential Pre-Retirement Conferences for clergy and their spouses. This Conference is staffed by experts who can advise on practical issues such as health, housing and finance, as well as by people who help with reflection on possibilities for future church ministry, occupation, leisure, etc.

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The Pre-Retirement Conference is offered free of charge to clergy and their spouses. You are warmly encouraged to accept the invitation as early as possible in the five years before your expected retirement date. The Pensions Board offers a number of publications regarding pensions and housing that you may find of assistance. http://www.churchofengland.org/clergy-office-holders/pensions-and-housing/housing.aspx The Pensions Board will help to provide retirement housing for clergy by way of mortgage and will consider applications from the age of 62 onwards. If you have insufficient capital to be considered for a mortgage, you may be eligible for a rented Pensions Board property. Applications for rented accommodation should be made SIX TO NINE MONTHS prior to retirement. The Pensions Board also offers the facility of an Equity Sharing Mortgage. This means that the pension buys the property, providing a portion of the purchase price, and the Church, through the Pensions Board, lends the balance. On the later sale of the property, proceeds will be divided in the same proportions as the capital contributions made for its purchase by you, the Pensions Board, and any other contributor (subject to the subsequent adjustment of shares arising from capital improvements or early part repayments of the loan). The Pensions Board also has a number of residential and nursing homes. Also the Friends of the Clergy Corporation still maintains a few freehold properties for use by retired clergy and widows. There are now many housing associations which have property to rent in most parts of the country. Local authority housing may be available. Within our Diocese, retirement housing for clergy and partners and housing for clergy widows may be available at Bromley and Sheppards College. Enquiries should be made to the Chaplain’s Office, Bromley College, London Road, Bromley, BR1 1EP (0181 460 4712). There is also the College of St Barnabas, Lingfield, which houses up to 40 residents, most of who are accommodated in two-room flats. There is limited provision for married couples. The College has a chapel, library, refectory and also a nursing wing. For details apply to the Warden, The College of St Barnabas, Blackberry Lane, Lingfield, RH7 6NJ (Tel: 01342 870366/870260; Fax: 01342 870193). www.st-barnabas.org.uk In cases of ill health, it is possible to retire early on a disability pension. Your first contact in this case should be with your Archdeacon, who will be pleased to ensure that you have the help and advice you need. All the information you require is contained in another useful pamphlet entitled “Your Pension Questions Answered”, which can also be obtained from the

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Church of England Pensions Board (contact details see above) http://www.churchofengland.org/media/49887/ypqacp.pdf Financial Planning for Retirement It is wise to take advice in this matter, but make sure that the distinction between an independent financial adviser and an agent of a provider of financial services is understood. Independent financial advisers are bound by law to give totally impartial advice (for which you may be charged). Other “advisers”, i.e. agents of providers, will, in general, be seeking to persuade you to use their services for insurance/saving schemes/investment plan through their company. At 60, both males and females are eligible for a Senior Citizen railcard, a Eurocard, and free prescriptions.

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DEATH IN OFFICE If your spouse dies in office, contact the Archdeacon who will inform the Diocesan Widows’ Officer. The Diocesan Widows’ Officer will visit and take much of the anxiety out of the situation by explaining to you what action to take about notifying the authorities and can help with the following: (a) Asking the Friends of the Clergy Corporation or the Sons of the Clergy

Corporation to help with a grant towards funeral expenses. (b) Contacting the local tax office and DSS for details about State benefits. (c) Helping the widow(er) work out future financial needs and resources. (d) Helping the widow(er) with continuing advice about housing and finance. Payment of the death-in-service lump sum will be made very quickly, and is usually tax-free. At present, it is three times the previous year’s minimum stipend. Further details are all contained within the Pensions Board’s publication “Your Pension Questions Answered”. (See also Finance section (3)(a) on page 11) The Corporation of the Sons of the Clergy may give grants on bereavement; maintenance grants for dependent children annually as long as children remain dependent on their mother; and certain other grants. It is a myth that a widow(er) must vacate the vicarage within six weeks of the death of their spouse. Time and help will be given to ensure that a suitable house is found, but naturally the house will be needed as soon as possible and so a move within three months would be the right timing at which to aim. It is advisable to check your position regarding insurance of your car. In some cases “the insured” is the husband and his wife drives as a person “authorised by him”. Even “two named drivers” situations may leave the one uninsured following the death of “the insured”. It may be prudent to have the insurance cover transferred into your name or obtain a cover note before driving. When registering the death, it is advisable to obtain two or three death certificates. These will be required for insurance purposes, etc.

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USEFUL PUBLICATIONS Money Matters Your Stipend – What You Need to Know Church Commissioners, Church House, 27 Great Smith Street, London SW1P 3AZ 020 7898 1009 The Parochial Expenses of the Clergy, a Guide to their Reimbursement Church Commissioners (see above) Help Sheets re Self-Assessment (Tax Returns) Inland Revenue Orderline (0645 000404) http://www.hmrc.gov.uk Which? Consumer Guide: A variety of books dealing with personal finance The Consumers’ Association http://www.which.co.uk/publications/books/finance/ Your Pensions Questions Answered The Pensions Board (020 7898 1839) The Church of England Voluntary Contribution Scheme The Pensions Board (see above) Age Concern: Various fact sheets regarding finance and tax http://www.ageuk.org.uk/money-matters Family Matters Families and How to Survive Them Robyn Skinner and John Cleese (Cedar) Family Matters Robyn Skinner (Cedar) Marriage: Ups and Downs Yvonne Warren (Canterbury Press) The Sixty Minute Marriage Rob Parsons (Hodder & Stoughton) The Sixty Minute Father Rob Parsons (Hodder & Stoughton) The RELATE Guide to Better Relationships Sarah Litvinoff (Ebury Press) The RELATE Guide to Sex in Loving Relationships Sarah Litvinoff (Vermillion)

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The RELATE Guide to Staying Together Susan Quilliam (Vermillion) The RELATE Guide to Starting Again Sarah Litvinoff (Vermillion) Holy Matrimony Mary Kirk and Tom Leary (Lynx) Living with God at the Vicarage Wanda Nash (Grove Books) Grove Books Ltd, Ridley Hall Road, Cambridge, CB3 9HU (01223 464849) Staying Sane under Stress Patsy Kettle (Grove Books – see above) Living with Limits Max Sinclair (A Lion Guide) Help for Handicapped People DSS Leisure AA Focus on Kent (Days out, walks, cycle rides, etc) Series of Walks in Kent (egg Coastal Walks, Kent Farm Trails, etc) (Published by KCC, available from most bookshops) Let’s Go with the Children in Kent (Available from most bookshops, published annually) Ordnance Survey Pathfinder Guide Family Walks in NW Kent, Weald of Kent and W Sussex Clive Cutler Moving On The Good (Non) Retirement Guide Frances Kay (Kogan Page – published annually – available from Amazon) Information Guides and Factsheets Age UK (www.ageuk.org.uk/publications/age-uk-information-guides-and-factsheets/) Retirement Housing

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Church of England Pensions Board (www.churchofengland.org/media/380459/retirement%20housing%20booklet%20v33.pdf) What to Do When Someone Dies: From Funeral Planning to Probate and Finance Anne Wadey (Which? Essential Guides – available from Amazon) What to do After a Death Directgov Public Services (www.direct.gov.uk/en/Governmentcitizensandrights/Death/WhatToDoAfterADeath/index.htm) Losing a Child Elaine Storkey (Lion Hudson – available from Amazon) Living through Grief Harold Bauman (Lion Hudson – available from Amazon) Information on most matters can be obtained free from your local Citizens’ Advice Bureau.

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USEFUL ADDRESSES AND TELEPHONE NUMBERS Bishop of Rochester Bishopscourt, St Margaret’s Street, Rochester, ME1 1TS 01634 842721 Bishop of Tonbridge Bishop’s Lodge, 48 St Botolph’s Road, Sevenoaks, TN13 3AG 01732 456070 Archdeacon of Bromley & Bexley The Archdeaconry, The Glebe, Chislehurst, BR7 5PX 020 8467 8743 Archdeacon of Rochester The Archdeaconry, King's Orchard, The Precinct, Rochester, ME1 1TG 01634 813533 Archdeacon of Tonbridge 3 The Ridings, Blackhurst Lane, Tunbridge Wells, TN2 4RU 01892 520660 Dean of Rochester The Deanery, Prior's Gate House, The Precinct, Rochester, ME1 1SR 01634 843366 Chaplain to the Bishop of Rochester Bishopscourt, St Margaret’s Street, Rochester, ME1 1TS 01634 814439 The Diocesan Secretary The Bishop’s Officer for Communications The Bishop’s Officer for Ministry and Training The Director of Education The Diocesan Treasurer The Diocesan Surveyor Diocesan Office, St Nicholas Church, Boley Hill, Rochester, ME1 1SL 01634 560000 The Diocesan Registrar – Contact details from the Diocesan Office 01634 560000 The Diocesan Clergy Retirement Office and Widows’ Officer – Contact details from the Diocesan Office 01634 560000 The Church Commissioners Church House 27 Great Smith Street London SW1P 3AZ 020 7898 1009 The Church of England Pensions Board 29 Great Smith Street London SW1P 3PS 020 7898 1800 The Ecclesiastical Insurance Group Ltd Beaufort House Brunswick Road Gloucester GL1 1JZ 0845 603838