comm 470 agenda - week 13 lc2 – i will return next week lc3 – due last class final exam –...
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COMM 470 Agenda - Week 13
• LC2 – I Will Return Next Week
• LC3 – Due last class
• Final Exam – Friday, May 19, 10:30 – 12:30
• Review Listening Exercise for Week 12
• Lecture - Tannen
• ITE 13
• Listening Exercise for Week 13
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In-Class Team Exercise # 13aDiscuss:
• How did you do with Noticing Complaining this week?
• Count how many times; share 2 examples• Was it easy? Difficult?
Deliverable - Summarize in a table how many conversations you each had where you:1) charted that same day2) charted before class today, but not the same day3) didn’t chart at all
4) ADDED: estimate your TOTAL # of conversations last week
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In-Class Team Exercise # 13bDiscuss:
• How did you do with Noticing Gossip this week?
• Count how many times; share 2 examples• Was it easy? Difficult?
Deliverable - Summarize in a table how many conversations you each had where you:1) charted that same day2) charted before class today, but not the same day3) didn’t chart at all
4) ADDED: estimate your TOTAL # of conversations last week
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Speaking into the Listening of Others
What are some examples of “weak speaking?”
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Speaking into the Listening of Others
What are some examples of “weak speaking?”
• Being indirect (not stating a request as a request)
• Being non-committal
• Being tentative
• Putting yourself down
What are some words that connote “weak speaking?”
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Speaking into the Listening of Others
What are some words that connote “weak speaking?”
• “Sort of”
• “Kind of”
• “Try”
What are some examples of “weak speaking?”
• “We’re going to, sort of, learn about listening.”
• “I’ll try to e-mail you tonight.”
• “Why don’t we have Chinese for lunch?”
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Speaking into the Listening of Others
What are some words that connote “STRONG speaking?”
• Yes
• No
• I want, I request, I agree, I disagree
What are some examples of “STRONG speaking?”
• “We are going to learn about listening.”
• “I will e-mail you tonight.”
• “I’d like to have Chinese for lunch?”
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Speaking into the Listening of Others
Other forms of “weak speaking”• Talking about the Past (Unless we focus on a lesson)
• Complaining (Almost always wasteful of time and focus)
• Gossiping (It reduces the listening we have for the object of the gossip)
Forms of “Strong speaking”
• Talking about the Present / Future (If planning or building)
• Taking Your Complaints to Someone with Power
• Acknowledging Others
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Electronic Text Communication
Categories of Rules for Clear E-Text Communication:
1. General Rules – Apply to ALL Electronic Text Communication
2. E-mail Rules
3. Instant Messaging (IM) Rules4. Text Messaging Rules (Do Some Differ from IM?)
5. Discussion Board Rules
6. ‘My Space’ Rules
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In-Class Team Exercise # 12c
What are the five (5) most important rules for clear DISCUSSION LIST communication?
Discuss:
• Each person should first rank their own top 3
• Hint: Think of examples when people have violated unwritten rules – what is the rule?
• The team should hold 3 rounds of discussion – individuals discuss 1 of their 3 – by using an example - each round
• The team should compare and choose the 5 most important
NOTE: When you find a “general” rule – one that applies to all (or most) forms of electronic text – take it out of this list and add it to the team’s list of General Rules for E-Text
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Deliverable: List the team’s top 5
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In-Class Team Exercise # 12d
What are the five (5) most important rules for effective “My Space” communication?
Discuss:
• Each person should first rank their own top 3
• Hint: Think of examples when people have violated unwritten rules – what is the rule?
• The team should hold 3 rounds of discussion – individuals discuss 1 of their 3 – by using an example - each round
• The team should compare and choose the 5 most important
NOTE: When you find a “general” rule – one that applies to all (or most) forms of electronic text – take it out of this list and add it to the team’s list of General Rules for E-Text
• ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Deliverable: List the team’s top 5
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In-Class Team Exercise # 12eWhat are the five (5) most important GENERAL rules
for effective Electronic Text communication?Discuss:
• Each person should first rank their own top 3
• Hint: Think of examples when people have violated unwritten rules – what is the rule?
• The team should hold 3 rounds of discussion – individuals discuss 1 of their 3 – by using an example - each round
• The team should compare and choose the 5 most important
NOTE: When you find a “general” rule – one that applies to all (or most) forms of electronic text – take it out of this list and add it to the team’s list of General Rules for E-Text
• ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Deliverable: List the team’s top 5
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Gender Issues in Communication
Deborah Tannen found - • Women view comm as Rapport; Men as ‘Report’
• Women experience comm as relatedness; Men experience comm as status (one-up or one-down)
• Women are more likely to be indirect; Men direct
• Women report a lack of comm in relationships; Men don’t
Differences When Looking at Kids -• Girls base relationships on talking; boys base them on doing
• Girls’ groups are small; Boys groups larger (also inclusive, hierarchical)
• Girls face each others, boys often don’t
• Girls support by sharing the same problem, boys minimize
Women & Men• Women verbalize agreement (participatory listenership), men use silence
• Women assume listener’s job is agreement; Men assume listener’s job is to challenge or probe
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Issues in CommunicationGirls & Boys • Boys have a hierarchy during play, Girls less so
• Boys see mistakes as more serious than girls do
• Play is ‘performance art’ for boys, girls worry less about getting credit
• Boys solve disputes physically, girls use negotiation
Direct vs. Indirect Comm • Being Involved vs. Being Independent• Deference vs. Camaraderie• Positive Politeness (involvement) vs. Negative Politeness (not
imposing) – Brown & Levinson
• Forging/eliciting consensus vs. manipulating
• Implying ‘no’ without saying no
• Dishonesty vs. Hypocrisy
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Issues in CommunicationArguments • Discussions in the media are more polarized today
• Cooperation and compromise is not much valued – so people sit it out
• Tannen’s example of the smoker
• Relationships are about getting what you want
• How can that be done 1) without domination, and 2) allowing others to get what they want
• The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. (F. Scott Fitzgerald)
• Everybody’s right. (Ken Wilber)
Family Communication • Literal meaning vs. meta-messages• Alignment – do you have to choose sides?