conflict and conflict resolution · conflict parties forget the substantive issues and transform...
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Conflict and
Conflict
ResolutionDee Amundson, PSC
Denver, CO
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Objectives
Define Conflict
Conflict Management Styles
Conflict Resolutions
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Conflict is a condition that exists
anytime two or more people disagree
over an issue or situation.
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An incompatibility between two or more opinions, principles, or
interests.
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3 Types of Conflict
Personal or relational conflicts
Instrumental conflicts Conflicts of interest
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Let’s Compare:
Intrapersonal Interpersonal
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Let’s Compare:
Intragroup Intergroup
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Let’s Compare:
Intra-organizational Inter-organizational
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Why do we care?Because conflict is always there
It starts the day we are born and
continues until the day we die
There is no way to avoid
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Educational Programs
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Children’s Books
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What
Causes
Conflict?
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The need to be rightMisunderstandingsPersonality clashesCompetition for resourcesAuthority issuesLack of cooperationDifferences of opinionLow performanceValues or goal differences
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Common Conflict in the
Workplace
Discrimination IssuesPerformance-Review Conflicts
Conflicts with CustomersLeadership ConflictsEmployee Diversity
Growth and Development
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Can Conflict be
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YES!Results in clarification of important problems and issuesResults in solutions to problemsInvolves people in resolving issues important to themCauses authentic communicationHelps release emotion, anxiety, stressBuilds cooperation among people through learning more about each otherJoining in resolving the conflictHelps individuals develop understanding and skills
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Advantages to ConflictHelps to raise and address problemsEnergizes work to be on the most appropriate
issuesHelps motivate people to participateHelps people learn how to recognize and
benefit from their differencesImproves communication
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Benefits to Conflict
Increased
Understanding
Expands people’s
awareness
Gives insight into how they can
achieve their goals without undermining
others
Better Group
Cohesion
Team members can
develop stronger
mutual respectRenew faith in ability
to work together
Improved Self-Knowledge
Examine own goals and expectations closelyHelp to understand the things that are most important to themSharpen focusEnhance effectiveness
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Use it,
don’t diffuse it!
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Can Conflict be
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DefinitelyBehaviors that escalate a conflict until it seems to have a life of its own
are dysfunctional and destructive.
Conflict parties forget the substantive issues and transform their
purposes to getting even, retaliating or hurting the other person.
No one is satisfied with the outcome
Possible gains are not realized
Negative taste left over at the end of one conflict episode is carried
over to the beginning of the next conflict--creating a degenerating or
negative spiral.
Destructive conflicts are more likely to occur when behaviors come from rigid, competitive systems.
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When conflict resolutions result in even more conflict
Competing or Fighting
Denial or Avoidance
Smoothing over the problem
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Dealing With Destructive
Conflict
Speak up – not the same as venting
Stand up
Step back
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Conflict
Management
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The process of limiting the negative aspects of conflict
while increasing the positive aspects of conflict.
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Keep in Mind…Learned behaviorAdapts as we learn and grow
Changes from one environment to the nextLeaders subconsciously change how conflict is managed in team-based situations
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Finding Your Management StyleEach statement on the next two slides provides a strategy for dealing with a conflictRate each statement on a scale of 1-4 indicating how likely you are to use this strategy
1. Rarely2. Sometimes3. Often4. Always
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1. I explore issues with others so as to find solutions that meet everyone’s needs.
2. I try to negotiate and adopt a give-and-take approach to problem situations.
3. I try to meet the expectations of others.
4. I would argue my case and insist on the merits of my point of view.
5. When there is a disagreement, I gather as much information as I can and keep the lines of communication open.
6. When I find myself in an argument, I usually say very little and try to leave as soon as possible.
7. I try to see conflicts from both sides. What do I need? What odes the other person need? What are the issues involved?
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8. I prefer to compromise when solving problems and just move on.
9. I find conflicts challenging and exhilarating; I enjoy the battle of wits that usually follows.
10. Being at odds with other people makes me feel uncomfortable and anxious.
11. I try to accommodate the wishes of my friends and family.
12. I can figure out what needs to be done and I am usually right.
13. To break deadlocks, I would meet people halfway.
14. I may not get what I want but it’s a small price to pay for keeping the peace.
15. I avoid hard feelings by keeping my disagreements with others to myself.
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Total Your AnswersCollaborating: 1, 5, 7 ___________
Competing: 4, 9, 12 ___________
Avoiding: 6, 10, 15 ___________
Accommodating: 3, 11, 14 ___________
Compromising: 2, 8, 13 ___________
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Thomas-Kilman Conflict Mode
Instrument (TKI)
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Interest-Based Relational
ApproachMake sure good relationships are a
priority
Separate people from problems
Listen carefully to different interests
Listen first, talk second
Set out the “facts”
Explore options together
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Real-Life Example:Someone pushes in front of you in line
Passive: does nothing
Aggressive: verbally attacks the intruder, yells at him or her, or threatens them
Passive-Aggressive: does not deal directly with the intruder, but looks to others or mutters quietly.
Assertive: describes the situation, expresses personal feelings, and says what should be done
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Ways of managing conflictHealthy
The capacity to recognize and respond to the things that matter to the other personCalm, non-defensive, and respectful reactionsA readiness to forgive and forget, and to move past the conflict without holding resentments or angerThe ability to seek compromise and avoid punishingA belief that facing conflict head-on is the best thing for both sides
UnhealthyAn inability to recognize and respond to the things that matter to the other personExplosive, angry, hurtful, and resentful reactionsThe withdrawal of love, resulting in rejection, isolation, shaming, and fear of abandonmentAn inability to compromise or see the other person’s sideThe fear and avoidance of conflict; the expectation of bad outcomes
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Conflict
Resolution
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Conflict resolution is a way for two or more parties to
find a peaceful solution to a disagreement among them.
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Steps
Understand the conflictCommunicate with the opposition
Brainstorm possible resolutionsChoose the best resolutionUse a third party mediator
Explore alternativesCope with stressful situations and pressure
tactics
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Four Key Conflict
Resolution Skills
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Four Key Conflict
Resolution Skills
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Four Key Conflict
Resolution Skills
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Four Key Conflict
Resolution Skills
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Let’s look at
some
examples
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Resident-Resident
Conflict
“She’s being loud!”
“He has too many guests over!”
“I swear, the bugs are coming from their unit!”
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Resident-Family Conflict“I don’t have time, mom, the kids have a soccer game today.”
“I think you’d be better off in a nursing home, I don’t have time to get your groceries for you.”
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Resident-Caregiver Conflict“I don’t feel like she listens to me.”
“All she does is come over and play on her phone.”
“He doesn’t clean well.”
“He cusses too much.”
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Resident-Staff Conflict“Your office is always closed!”
“You never have time for me!”
“Why does he get to be in your office for an hour and I get 5 minutes?”
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Staff-Caregiver Conflict“You’re here 3 days a week, why isn’t his apartment passing inspection?”
“Why doesn’t she have any clean clothes?”
“You were supposed to be here at 10a, it’s now 3p, where are you?”
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Staff-Staff Conflict“You’re always late and I have to do the trash myself!”
“I hate country music, why do you insist on playing it?”
“You never listen to me!”
“Why don’t you just answer my question!”
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Staff-Family Conflict“I can’t give you a key to the apartment because your mother told me not to.”
“I need a copy of your dad’s proof of income from Social Security or he’ll lose his apartment.”
“Why won’t you check on my mom daily? Isn’t that your job?”
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Realize this about
conflict
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Realize this about
conflict
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Realize this about
conflict
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www.mjhousingandservices.com
Realize this about
conflict
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My Contact InformationDee Amundson, PSC
Service Coordinator, Hiring Specialist & Training Specialist
Drehmoor Apartments
215 E. 19th Ave
Denver, CO 80203
Tel: 303-832-0821
Fax: 303-863-9175
Email: [email protected]
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Resourceshttp://www.slideshare.net/Ogwanwa/workplace-conflict
https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newLDR_81.htm
https://www.edcc.edu/counseling/documents/Conflict.pdf
http://ctb.ku.edu/en/table-of-contents/implement/provide-information-enhance-skills/conflict-resolution/main
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Resourceshttps://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships/conflict-resolution-skills.htm
https://essentialsofbusiness.ufexec.ufl.edu/resources/human-resources/the-conflict-resolution-process/#.WJtIgfkrKM9
https://www.notredameonline.com/resources/negotiations/the-five-styles-of-conflict-resolution/#.WJtIy_krKM9
https://www.thriveinc.com/
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Resourceshttp://www.focusonthefamily.com/lifechallenges/relationship-challenges/conflict-resolution/destructive-conflict-recognize-it-stop-it
http://www.personalityexplorer.com/freeresources/conflictmanagementtechniques.aspx
http://www.maximumadvantage.com/conflict-resolution-webinar/the-causes-of-conflict.html
https://smartkids101.com/blog/conflict-resolution-skills/
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Resourceshttp://smallbusiness.chron.com/examples-conflicts-
resolutions-workplace-11230.html
http://woman.thenest.com/examples-conflicts-
resolutions-workplace-15167.html
http://www.cios.org/encyclopedia/conflict/Cnature3_des
tructive.htm
https://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/conflict-resolution.html