I N S I D E T H I S

I S S U E :

Conflict

Resolution

2

Oral Health

Week of the

Young Child

3

Legislative

Breakfast

4

Fundraiser 5

Pancakes for

Parkinson

6

Camp Erin 7

Event Dates 8

Dates to

Remember

March

17th. St. Patrick’s Day

April

14th—18th. Spring

Break. Center closed.

MILFORD FAMILY RESOURCE CENTER

Judy Lobdell, Editor March 2014

Milford Family Resource Center

Staff:

Program Manager:

Peggy Kelly

Parent Educators:

Kathy Aspinwall

Judy Lobdell

Anne Mundy

The Milford Family

Resource Center

@Mathewson School

466 West River Street

Milford, CT 06461

(203)783-3626

mfrc@milforded.org

Peace begins within the individual. As parents and teachers, we are responsible for helping

those individuals in our care to develop strategies and skills that support understanding and

effective communication. So how do we promote these skills in young children?

Betsey Evans, author of “You Can’t Come to My Birthday”, feels that conflicts are “absolutely

normal, healthy good stuff,” She also feels even the youngest of toddlers can learn to negotiate

and problem solve for themselves and others.* While toddlers may have their own set of

‘property laws’ (see January newsletter 2014 at milforded.org), they are capable of learning to

navigate their way through a process that ultimately helps them to peacefully resolve conflicts.

Giving young children this important task fosters responsible interaction with the adults and

peers in their lives.

Evans, through her writings and nursery school, The Giving Tree, has

many stories to relate that demonstrate how children develop these

skills. One such example involves an 18 month old toddler who began

crying when his mother went to the closet to get a stroller so they

could walk to the store.

“No! No stroller!” the boy cried to her. She calmly leaned over and

consoled her son. “You’re so upset. You really don’t want to go in the

stroller, do you?”

As he began calming down, the mother – who’d been trained in mediation – told her son, “You

know, Tom, I think we have a problem. I can’t carry you to the store, and it’s too far for you to

walk. What do you think we should do?”

When he did not respond, she offered, “I have an idea. Do you want to hear it? You can get in

the stroller yourself or I can put you in. Which do you want?”

“Me do it,” Tom answered. Evans explains, “If we can give children choices, it helps them to be

a participant in the process.” In another incident this same mother had a similar experience with

her younger 16-month-old son. As she was about to negotiate with her son, she heard his now 3-

year-old brother say, “Jack, we have a problem. Mommy can’t carry you all the way. Do you

want Mommy to put you in the stroller, or do you want to get in the stroller yourself?” He then

hopped in the stroller.*

Obviously not all situations may run this smoothly, but it is interesting to note that the parent

remained calm, gave the child a choice and most likely had a plan B that involved a rational con-

sequence. And, eventually, this process would become a more attractive option. Evans outlines a

simple four step process (see insert p.2) in her book that teachers, parents, and children learn and

use at the NAEYC accredited, The Giving Tree nursery school. Evans states:

Conflict Resolution For Young Children

“[Participants become] familiar with the problem-solving dialogue and [have] many varied experi-

ences with conflicts and solutions. Over time the children ... come to trust the process. Children

quickly learn that feelings and ideas are respected during problem solving, and soon their emotions

no longer escalate to an intense level during conflicts. Consequently the job of mediation becomes

less difficult. The job of mediator [is] a natural progression; they... become experts at coming up

with solutions, and now, independently, they become experts at guiding their peers as they [create]

solutions to everyday problems.”*

In her article “What Is Peace”, Evans enlarges the picture when she relates a discussion she had during

snack time with several preschoolers . The topic had turned to defining what war means. The children’s

responses included, “It’s when people kill each other.” “It’s a lot of fighting.” “It’s people shooting.”

“People get dead in war.” Wanting to see if they had a clear understanding of what peace meant, Evans

asked, “So what is peace?” “Their answers came slowly, thoughtfully, their inspiration extending from

one boy to the next, as their ideas became a spontaneous poem.”* (See below)

*excerpts from http://www.kidsandconflict.com

Ultimately, teaching these skills to young children leads to peaceful

resolutions in everyday conflicts that can expand as our children grow

and move into the world to take their place as adults.

For further reading on this topic, see

A. Faber & E. Mazlish. “Siblings Without Rivalry”

F. Cline & J. Fey. “Parenting With Love and Logic:”

Website: http://www.kidsandconflict.com/

Peace is not shooting.

Is quiet.

Is not killing anything.

Is not throwing litter.

Peace is eating healthy stuff.

Is being silly.

Is not breaking glass.

Is not walking in the house with muddy boots.

Peace is not stealing money.

Is not pulling somebody’s hair out.

Is giving someone a present.

Is giving someone something to eat if they are homeless.

Is playing peaceful and sharing toys and something real tasty.

Peace is playing outside together.*

Poem created by preschool boys at The Giving Tree nursery school

A young participant

demonstrates the proper

way to brush.

Debbie Britz and Elaine Colangelo, Dental

Hygienists for the Milford Public Schools

brought 2 puppet friends for an informative

talk on dental care for young children. Dr. Paula

Cerqueira –Putnam, a pediatric dentist and

Milford Family Resource Center playgroup

participant with her son, was also on hand to

answer parents questions.

Early Learning for Oral Health Care

Celebrate the Week of the Young Child

April 6th—12th

Look for Kids Count Flags on the Milford Green during

the month of April

Harborlight Happening

Harborlight Happening is scheduled for Thursday, May 29 at the Milford Yacht Club.

Christine Kennedy and Andrea Giannattasio, co chairpersons of this annual event, as well as the

Harborlight Happening committee are looking forward, once again, to a successful and fun evening.

Harborlight Happening is Kids Count’s only fundraiser. Proceeds help to underwrite preschool

scholarships for children who attend private Milford preschools.

Dinner, silent and live auctions, the rose game, the unlock your luck game will be enhanced

by sharing an evening with friends and family.

So save the date: Thursday, May 29 from 6:00 to 9:30 pm

For more information, contact Peggy Kelly at pkelly@milforded.org

Kids Count of Milford Peggy Kelly, Executive Director March, 2014

Governor Dannel Malloy Announces Plan for 1020 New Preschool Slots for 2014

Governor Malloy has announced that he has proposed to the legislature funding for additional preschool slots

that will be administered by the State Department of Education School Readiness Program. Therefore, programs

in Milford and surrounding communities who are eligible may apply to the Milford School Readiness Council.

Criteria includes:

Accreditation—All programs must be accredited by the National Association for the Education of Young

Children or become accredited within (3) years of the month this site began serving children.

Teacher Education Requirement— Any program accepting state funds from the School Readiness Grant

must have lead teaching staff who hold a bachelors degree with an early childhood concentration.

License—Each program site must hold a current license from the Department of Public Health.

Programs requesting consideration by the Milford School Readiness Council are encouraged to contact

Peggy Kelly at 203-783-3627 or pkelly@milforded.org no later than March 28.

Kids Count of Milford Preschool Scholarships

Preschool Scholarships are available for Milford residents who will be enrolling their children into the

Milford private preschools in September 2014.

Please contact Peggy Kelly at 203-783-3627 for an application.

Kids Count of Milford invites you to attend

Annual Legislative Breakfast

Milford Yacht Club

Thursday, April 10, 2014

8:00 a.m. to 10:00 a.m.

Special Guests: Mrs. Susan Strelez and her Third Grade Class

Pumpkin Delight School

Champion of Young Children Award Recipients:

Terry Fonseca, Kingdom Life Church Resource Center

Wepawaug Valley District Boy Scouts of Milford

Milford Salvation Army Service Unit

Acknowledgement of High School Students

Milford Legislators:

Senator Gayle Slossberg

Representative Paul Davis

Representative Kim Rose

Representative James Maroney

sponsored by:

Kids Count of Milford, United Way of Milford, and the

William Caspar Graustein Memorial Fund

$10.00 per person – mail checks to:

Kids Count of Milford

167 Cherry Street #169Milford, Connecticut 06460

You may also pay at the door.

Camp Erin Connecticut

The Cove Center for Grieving Children, a non-profit grief and healing organiza-

tion dedicated to helping children and families who have experienced the death of

a loved one, has partnered with The Moyer Foundation, to facilitate Camp Erin

Connecticut.

Camp Erin® is a FREE, weekend long grief support camp to be held on June 6-8,

2014. The camp is designed to help children and teenagers ages 6-17, who have

experienced the death of a parent, sibling or someone close to them. Camp Erin

Connecticut is open to all grieving children statewide.

JOIN US FOR OUR PARENT/CAREGIVER INFO NIGHT

Hosted by Pam Tobin-Sachs, Director of Camp Erin Connecticut

Pam will provide an overview of the camp experience and answer your questions about the camp

weekend.

Saturday, March 8 3:00-5:00pm Guilford Public Library

67 Park Street, Guilford CT

Saturday, March 22 4:15-6:00pm Edith Wheeler Memorial Library

733 Monroe Turnpike, Monroe CT

ENROLL A CAMPER

Camp Erin is FREE to all campers. Registrations are being accepted on a first-come first-serve

basis. Space is filling quickly. To enroll, contact Yannah Preta, Camp Coordinator.

Camp Erin combines traditional, fun camp activities with grief education and emotional support, facilitated by grief

professionals and trained volunteers. Through interactions with other children and with adults, campers learn that they

are not alone in their grief. Camp Erin provides a relaxed, safe and supportive setting for children to express emotions,

share their grief and learn positive coping skills. The Cove Center for Grieving Children will also provide families

with long-term support at our family sites.

The Moyer Foundation is a public, 501(c)(3) non-profit organization with a mission to provide comfort, hope and

healing to children affected by loss and family addiction. Camp Erin® is the nation's largest network of free bereave-

ment camps for grieving children and teens ages 6 - 17. For more information on The Moyer Foundation and its pro-

grams, please visit www.moyerfoundation.org.

To RSVP and for directions, please contact Yannah Preta, Camp Coordinator,

by phone at 203.634.0500 x15 or by e-mail at yannah@covect.org. Information is also available at www.covect.org.

Imagine you are six years old, with two younger brothers, and you have been diagnosed with leuke-

mia. Mom and Dad explain that, after chemotherapy and radiation, you’ll be fine. But you’re one

of the few who doesn’t get better, and so the chemotherapy and radiation go on – for seven years.

Finally you’re in remission. Then the leukemia comes back. You get more chemotherapy and go

into remission again. Now you need a bone marrow transplant. A donor is found and you are

scheduled for a transplant at Dana Farber Cancer Institute in Boston, Massachusetts - if you can get

strong enough to withstand the surgery.

This has been life for thirteen year old Dylan and his family. They have bravely met all these chal-

lenges and setbacks with faith and hope for a full recovery. However, the fight for Dylan’s life has

been exacerbated by loss of employment, which has caused great financial stress.

Plans are being made by friends of the family from St. Mary Church for a family day on June 7 to

raise funds to help the Fortunato family.

The event will be open to the entire Milford Community and all funds raised will go to the Dylan A.

Fortunato Medical Expenses Fund.

If you would like to make a donation, you may send a check made out to the Dylan A. Fortunato

Medical Fund to Joe Wolf at 190 Fresh Meadow Lane, Milford 06461.

Remember to come to Family Day, June 7 at St. Mary Parish Hall

It will be fun!

Committee Members

Joan Wolf, Joe Wolf, Diane Candido, Tony Candido, Deacon John Hoffman

Top of the Morning’ to you!

You are invited to join with Kids Count,

The Milford Family Resource Center,

and the School Readiness Program to march

in the St. Patrick’s Day Parade on Saturday,

March 15 at

12:30 pm Wasson Field.

Join with other groups supporting the

United Way of Milford.

Please RSVP to Peggy Kelly at pkelly@milforded.org