Continuing Education

Learn to Give and Receive CareTo our Stephen Minister

Brothers and Sisters

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As a Caregiver

How is caregiving impacting your life? How is your life impacting your caring relationships?

How is caregiving impacting your faith? How is your faith impacting your caring relationship?

How are you caring for yourself? Who cares for you?

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Goal of Supervision Small Group

SMs grow by caring for each other SMs grow by listening SMs grow by contributing and giving SM small groups foster trust SM small groups enable growth as

persons and as caregivers

How can we maximize these benefits?

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The Heart of the Supervision Process

A supportive environment for discovery Provide help for SMs to come up with their

own strategies or solution ** Don’t attempt to “fix” SMs or their CR problems **

Caregivers will Gain insight about caring relationships Increase confidence in themselves Develop their own action plans for giving care

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Tools

Contact Record Sheet – p. 382 Check-in Statement Form – p. 384 Stephen Minister’s Progress Report – p. 385 Questions for Regular Supervision Group

Evaluation – p. 389 Questions for Periodic Supervision Group

Evaluation – p. 390

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Supervision Session

The Beginning

Gather and Pray Check- in

Heart of the Process

In-depth Reports

The End

Evaluate Group Performance

• Explore &Caring for the Caregiver;

• SM Summary

Plan and Pray

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Contact Record Sheet

Purpose: Establish accountability Provide insight into caring relationship

Expect written sheets – hand-written Notes useful for future reference

** Verbal reports waste time, invite discussion, may reveal more about CR than appropriate

Hand to facilitator after prayer, before check-in statements Facilitator performs 1-minute scan and comment

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Check-in Statement

Purpose: Brief status report about the caring relationship Notification of urgent issues

Expect verbal report, read from written report, following expected format

** Off-the-cuff reports waste time, invite discussion, typically reveal more about CR than appropriate

Only brief response expected from group To offer affirmation To ensure urgent issues will be addressed in the in-depth

phase

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In-Depth Report

Purpose: Allows caregiver to get group insight about his/her

caring relationship Expect verbal report, following SM Progress Report

format (about 5 – 8 minutes) Responses: affirmation and insights focused on the

caring relationship and the caregiver

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Hierarchy of Concentration

The Caring Relationship

A Quality B Spiritual C Direction

The Caregiver

D Feelings E Skills F Growth

The Care Receiver

G Situation H Referral

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2

3

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Focus on the Care Relationship

Respect, Genuineness, Warmth and Regard…Challenges and Rewards…Expectations and Frustrations…Process or Results

Oriented…. Boundaries

Spiritual Issues and Insights… Comfort and Consolation….Prayer Requests and Experience … Presence of the Holy Spirit

Changing or NOT? Change Factors? Goals?Solid… Tentative … Shaky … Contact Frequency and Duration …

Continuing or Closing

Qualities of the Relationship

Spiritual Nature of the Relationship

Direction of the Relationship

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Helping the SM to Care Better

Begin with focus on the Caring Relationship

1. Listen for and develop insights about: Quality Spiritual Nature Direction of the Relationship

2. Always respond to: Examples

• You appear to have excellent rapport with your care receiver.

Response to the SM’s Progress Report

• You have been in this relationship for a long time. How is it changing?

• Praying with your care receiver seems to offer you new insights.

Evaluate

Encourage

Affirm

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Focus on the Caregiver’s

Self-assessment: Good match?... Emotional Involvement… Conflict in Lifestyle, Value or Beliefs … Concerns and Regrets

Evolving Friendship

What is working well .. What’s not?Confidence and Capability Needs … Disappointments

Personal Insights and Attitudes as a CaregiverSpiritual Renewal or Deficits

Feelings

Skills

Personal Growth

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Helping the SM to Care Better

After the Caring Relationship is addressed,

1. Listen for and develop insights about the Caregiver’s Feelings Skills Personal Growth

2. Always respond to: Examples

• You have incredibly keen insights about yourself as a caregiver.

Response to the SM’s Progress Report

• How is your friendship with the care receiver impacting your role as a caregiver?

• You have encouraged your frustrations with him remarkably well.

Evaluate

Encourage

Affirm

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Focus on the Care Receiver’s

Needy or Nurtured …Deceptive or non-responsiveChange in personal situation changed nature of his/her problem

Confused … Overwhelmed … Depressed … DesperateConflicted…. Inconsistent … Dependency (addiction)

Situation

Need for a Health Care Referral

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Helping the SM to Care Better

Finally, After addressing the needs of the caregiver,

1. Listen for and develop insights about the Care Receiver’s Situation Need for a Referral

2. Always respond to: Examples

• Your process approach in helping your care receiver cope with her loneliness seems to be working.

Response to the SM’s Progress Report

• Is your care receiver now able to manage financially after her husband left her?

• Your care receive is reluctant to seek professional help, but we agree she needs it.

Evaluate

Encourage

Affirm

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SM Response Summary

The Caregiver provides a response to the Group, Summarize what he/she got out of the

discussion, Share his/her care giving plans moving

forwardJot them down!

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SM Response Summary

The Caregiver provides a response to the Group, Summarize what he/she got out of the

discussion, Share his/her care giving plans moving

forwardJot them down!

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Supervision Session

The Beginning

Gather and Pray Check- in

Heart of the Process

In-depth Reports

The End

Evaluate Group Performance

• Explore &Caring for the Caregiver;

• SM Summary

Plan and Pray

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Peer Supervision Skills Practice

Case Study #1

Long Term Relationships Alice has cared for her care receiver for 3 years. She tells her Supervision Group she meets every 2 weeks for a

home visit and they attend church together every Sunday She says that her relationship is very stable and there are no

pressing issues to address, so she just provides some family news about the care receiver in her check-in reports since there is nothing else much to report.

Because her Group knows all about her care receiver, she doesn’t make in-depth reports or feel the need to use forms for her check-ins.

Her former Supervision Group suggested closure, but she likes her care receiver too much to hurt her feelings.

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Try to answer these questions

1. What is not working well in this Supervision Group?

2. Where should the caring focus be? The Relationship? The Caregiver? The CR? What major topics in the are of focus?

3. What are the most appropriate issues to address?

4. How would you (1) Affirm the caregiver? (2) Help the caregiver evaluate the issues? (3) Encourage the caregiver?

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Case Study #2

Spiritual Issues? John’s care receiver is distraught about the lack of attention he is getting

from his new Pastor. When his wife recently passed away, the Pastor gave him only 30 minutes over the phone to provide information for the Pastor’s eulogy in preparation for the memorial service.

The care receiver feels that John is a poor substitute for the care he should be getting from the Pastor and John agrees. While he and John get along just fine, every session together is about how disappointed he is with this new Pastor.

The CR has been a member for 25 years and hardly ever missed a Sunday, but now he just will not come back to church. He is thinking about changing churches, but he loves his old church and his many friends there.

John gets lots of advice about what his care receiver needs to do, but is yet to give an in-depth report.

The Group worries that the Pastor should get involved.

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Case Study #3

Needy Care Receiver Mary, a new SM, has been assigned a very needy care receiver whose

troubles are comparable with those of Job and whose faith is Job-like in that she accepts everything that has happened as God’s will.

The CR never misses church but otherwise does little to address the many family relationship and financial problems that she faces.

Mary has a great rapport with the CR and feels comfortable in the relationship, but brings a long list of problems to each supervision session.

Her Group, feeling Mary is not ready for such a tough assignment, diligently develops a strategy to help her CR resolve some problems.

Little time is left in Supervision to address any other caring relationship – all of which seem to be going well.

This has been the same for several months.

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Case Study #4

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished Fred’s CR has financial problems and could lose his business, his home,

and his self-respect. Fred is a financial advisor and has dealt with problems far worse than this.

Fred knows better, but he just can’t help himself. So Fred meets twice weekly with his CR to work through his many financial issues and amazingly things are looking up!

Fred is proud of his accomplishments and gives a “balance sheet” report in place of his check-in statements.

His care receiver has told everyone he knows just how valuable having a SM is!

The Supervision Coordination is very upset with Fred AND his Supervision Group about unaddressed boundary issues.

Fred says he can’t stop now… not when things are just beginning to turn around for his CR.

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Case Study #5

Impact of Caregiving Robert was an executive in a large company and had excellent rapport

with his employees. When he retired, he missed those relationships, and to compensate, he volunteered as a Stephen Minister.

Over a 3-year period, he was assigned three CRs – each had a terminal illness. His relationships with the three CRs were most rewarding.

The family of each of his first two CRs asked Robert to speak at the funeral service, although he had known each CR only a few months.

Because of the closeness of their relationship, the family of his last CR asked Robert to be with him and pray for him when life support was removed.

His Supervisor Groups had been most supportive, but Robert stopped coming to Supervision a few months after the last CR passed away. When asked about it, he said that was that he was just taking some time off.

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Case Study #6

On Again, Off Again From the very beginning it appeared that Lucy had problems connecting

with her CR. First visit went well… Lucy thought. But several months went by before

she heard from her CR again – this time at night and from the emergency room. Apparently, she had overdosed on ibuprofen?

Things went well for 2 months and then the CR said that she was too busy to meet.

Just as the Supervision Group was about to recommend closure, the CR called and told Lucy that she had been arrested, didn’t say why but did say she was too embarrassed to call before now – afraid the news would get back to her church friends.

Now the CR feels abandoned by church friends and needs Lucy more than ever.

Lucy is not so sure.

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