covey, sean. the 7 habits of highly effective teens. new york: fireside, 1998. by mrs. johnson and...

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Habit 1- Be Proactive “People are just about as happy as they make up their mind to be.” -Abraham Lincoln Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens . New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

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Page 1: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Habit 1- Be Proactive

“People are just about as happy as they make up their mind to

be.”-Abraham Lincoln

Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998.

By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Page 2: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Being proactive is the key to unlocking all of the other habits- that’s why it comes first!

“I am the force, I am the captain of my life. I can choose my attitude. I’m

responsible for my own happiness and unhappiness. I am in the driver’s seat of my destiny, not just a passenger.”

Page 3: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

There are two types of people in this world…

Proactive- those who take responsibility for their lives

Reactive- those who blame others for their problems

Every day you will have about 100 chances to be proactive or

reactive…THE CHOICE IS YOURS!

Page 4: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Which one describes you more often?

Reactiv

e S

tate

ments

Pro

activ

e S

tate

ments

I’ll try That’s just the way I am There’s nothing I can do I can’t do it You ruined my day

I can do it I can do better than that Let’s look at all the options I can do it, there has to be a way I’m not going to let your bad mood ruin

my day

LISTEN TO YOUR LANGUAGE

Page 5: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

WHAT DOES THE BAD HABIT LOOK LIKE?

Page 6: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Being REACTIVE…

Reactive People make choices based on impulse.

They are like a can of pop. If life shakes them up a bit, they explode.

Page 7: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

REACTIVE PEOPLE HAVE

VICTIMITIS VIRUS People who suffer from this “virus” say things like: “I would be starting in

today’s game, but the coaches have something against me.”

“I would have gotten an A on my test if my best friend didn’t make me stay out late last night.”

“I would be happier if my parents would just get off my back.”

THEY NEVER TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR THEIR ACTIONS, PROBLEMS, AND

HAPPINESS.

Page 8: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

REACTIVE PEOPLE…

Are easily offended Blame others Get angry and say

things they later regret

Whine and complain Wait for things to

happen to them Change only when

they have to

Page 9: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

There’s a Hole in my Sidewalk by Portia Nelson

II walk down the street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalkI fall in.

I am lost — I am hopeless.It isn't my fault.

It takes forever to find a way out.

II I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalkI pretend I don't see it.

I fall in againI can't believe I'm in the same place

But it isn't my faultIt still takes a long time to get out.

IIII walk down the same street.There is a deep hole in the

sidewalkI see it is there.

I still fall in — it's a habitMy eyes are openI know where I am

It is MY fault.I get out immediately.

IVI walk down the same street.There is a deep hole in the

sidewalkI walk around it.

VI walk down a DIFFERENT street

Page 10: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

HOW DO I BECOME PROACTIVE?

Page 11: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

To be PROACTIVE…

Don’t become easily offended

Take responsibility for your choices

Think before you act Bounce back when

something bad happens

Always find a way to make it happen

Realize you can’t control everything that HAPPENS to you

Page 12: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

#1 - REALIZE WE CAN CONTROL ONLY ONE THING…

HOW WE RESPOND to

what happens to us

We will feel like VICTIMS if we worry about the things we

cannot change

Page 13: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

#2- TURN SETBACKS INTO TRIUMPHS

Page 14: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Taking the Proactive Road…Story:

“I got on my motorcycle to ride to work one day. At an intersection, a laundry truck and I collided. The bike went down, crushed my elbow and fractured my pelvis, and the gas can popped open on my bike. As the gas poured out, the heat of the engine ignited it, and I got burned over 65% of my body. After numerous surgeries and treatments I suffered another tragedy. A few years later, I was in a plane crash that paralyzed the lower half of my body.”

Page 15: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

How do you act proactively in this situation?

He tells people who are also suffering from extreme conditions…

“Before this happened to me, there were

10,000 things I could do. Now

there are 9,000. Rather than dwell

on the 1,000 things I lost, I look forward to the 9,000 things

left.”

Page 16: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

#3- Be a “Change Agent”

Unfortunately, kids who come from dysfunctional families, are at a higher

risk of repeating the same bad choices or

habits.

Hilda came from a family that didn’t make much money. Her

mom worked in a factory and her dad made just above minimum wage. They were always busy, and didn’t have much time to

help Hilda with school. Hilda was determined to finish high school, go to college, and get a good job,

even though nobody in her family had made it through college. Although she got

married and had a baby right after high school, she continued to go to school and met her goal

of graduating college. Now, because of her education, she is able to value school and support her kids through their education.

She was the POSITIVE CHANGE in her family!

Page 17: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Scenario #1

You overhear your best friend bad-mouthing you in front of a group. She doesn’t know you overheard her. In fact, just five minutes ago she was telling you a secret. You feel hurt and betrayed.

How would you handle this if you are being reactive/proactive?

Page 18: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

An

sw

er

Reactiv

e C

hoice

s Pro

activ

e C

hoice

s

Tell her off Become depressed because you are so

hurt by her Give her the silent treatment for 2

months Spread vicious rumors about her, after

all, she did it to you!

Forgive her Take some time to cool off, then

confront her, and talk it out Ignore it and give her a second chance.

Realize we all have weaknesses, and you’ve probably talked about her at some point too.

Page 19: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Scenario #2

You start a new school and one of the students starts bullying you. For some

reason this person has decided he doesn’t like you. He says rude and insulting things to you everyday, and he’s in a lot of your classes. He constantly talks behind your

back and is getting other kids to dislike you too.

How would you handle this if you were being reactive/ proactive?

Page 20: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Possib

le A

nsw

ers

Reactiv

e

Pro

activ

e

Punch him Yell at him Talk bad about him to other kids Cry Walk with your head down as you pass

him in the halls

Ignore him Keep your head held high Make friends with other people in the school Report him to a teacher Smile at him and say “hello”

“If you don’t react to his bullying attempts, it will get old and he will move on.”

Page 21: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

#4- To act PROACTIVELY, Just Push “PAUSE”

When someone is rude to you, where do you get the power to resist being rude back?

JUST PUSH PAUSE!

If you learn to pause, get control, and think about how you will respond, you’ll make smarter decisions.

Page 22: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

#5- To be PROACTIVE, use your Power Pack Tools

Self Awareness- I can stand apart from myself and observe my thoughts and actions

Conscience- I can listen to my inner voice to know right from wrong

Imagination- I can envision new possibilities

Willpower- I have the power to choose

The more you use these tools, the stronger they become, and the easier

it is to be proactive.

Page 23: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Scenario #3

You didn’t study for your Spanish midterm, and one of your friends snagged a copy of the test. You reach for the stolen copy of the test, but you stop…

Use your POWER PACK TOOLS

Imagine- what could happen if you do this?

Conscience- what

does my inner voice tell me I should do?

Willpower- what will

I choose?

Page 24: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Being Proactive is harder than being Reactive…

It’s so much easier to be reactive and lose your cool. Acting this way doesn’t take any control. And it’s easier to whine and complain than take on the responsibilities. Without question, being PROACTIVE is the higher road, that takes more effort.

Page 25: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

How will HABIT 1 “BE PROACTIVE” change your life?

Page 26: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Proactive people are…

courageous, persistent, and smart easy to work with cooperative not stressing about the things they

cannot change in control of their lives positive thinkers HAPPY!

Page 27: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Baby Steps Do something today that you

have always wanted to do, but never dared. Raise your hand in class, say hi to somebody you’d like to be friends with, try out for a sports team…

Write yourself a post-it note. “I will not let _________ (person’s name) determine how I feel today” Hang it in your locker as a reminder.

If you get in a fight with a friend or parent, be the first to apologize and open lines of communication.

Push the pause button before you react to somebody bumping you in the hall, calling you a name, or cutting you in line.

Use your tool of self-awareness right now. What is your most unhealthy habit? _____________________________

What are you going to do about it? _____________________________

Page 28: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski

Whether I fail or succeed shall be no man’s doing but my own. I AM THE FORCE! I can

clear any obstacle before me, or I can be lost in the maze. My choice, my responsibility,

win or lose, only I hold the key to my future.” -Elaine Maxwell

Are you in the driver’s seat of your life, or are you merely the passenger?

The choice is yours!

Page 29: Covey, Sean. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens. New York: Fireside, 1998. By Mrs. Johnson and Mrs. Adamoski