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By email to all members of Swindon Phoenix Rotary Club, and some members of Foothill Highlands Rotary

Club USA, Tappahannock Rotary Club USA, also Rotary Club Members in Australia, Indore and Bhopal

India and special supporters elsewhere

The comments expressed in this newsletter, if not credited to someone else, are the thoughts & opinions of the Editor and

therefore may not be the opinions of all the members of the Rotary Club of Swindon Phoenix.

Secretary; P.P.

John Flanagan

District Governor

P.P. Tony Horn PHF

The Rotary Club of Swindon Phoenix District 1100 England

The weekly bulletin (aptly named)

’The Birdy’ President

Geoff Beale

Issue number 203

Volume number 4

Number 38 of this Rotary Year (excluding special issues)

Next weeks host is

Rotarian Charlotte Mudd

Editor; P P Peter Editor; P P Peter Editor; P P Peter

Goldsworthy. Goldsworthy. Goldsworthy.

P.H.F. Sapphire P.H.F. Sapphire P.H.F. Sapphire

Sub Editor 2; PP Peter

(Grumpy) Newson PHF

£650.00 Raised by Rtn, Gail’s

Quiz Night

for the Silver Bells School in Africa

Well Done once again Gail!

Editors apology; no Birdy last week due to a being B & F meeting and the fact that Edi-

tor is up to his eyes in end of year accounts and ‘honey do’ jobs (as our American cousins say) after a fab holiday over the pond.

President Elect

Nicole Price

President Nominee

Nigel Causton

Immediate

Past President &

Club Treasurer

David Coe

Sub Editor; PP Paul

(Scoop) Parfrey PHF

Swindon Phoenix Rotary Club

Honoured Recipient;

2016 Pride of Swindon

Team Award

Sub editor 3; Rtn Chris

(Super Scribe) Sims

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No report from B & F last week as due to being a combined Council and B&F much of it was ‘in house’ business but here are a few pix of the folk who attended.

Oh yes and Elliott gave us a lesson on how to keep a malteaser chocolate in the air before dropping it

into the mouth to enjoy it!

Now guess who won on

Lucky Lucy this week!

Is Flan looking so happy as

this is his last B&F before

leaving his position as Secre-

tary? This is also his last one

as a Rotarian as he leaves us

at the end of this Rotary

Year .. Be sure you will be

missed Flan!!

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Host and Organiser Gail’s report

Another fun evening with Rotary friends, wives and of course little Jool. (Elliot's son) on Wednesday.

For a change we went to play skittles at the Southbrook arms. With two random teams drawn out the hat the fun began throwing the first ball backwards between our legs. Caused quite a bit of amuse-ment.

After two rounds the teams were neck and neck. At break time whilst eating a scrumptious buffet with amazing hot chips followed by strawberries and chocolate flakes we drew a raffle ticket for the winning number to play the game, 'Play your cards right'. With a kitty of £19 to play for Julie Causton started off by changing a horrible 8 for a King !! She smashed the game by some very random choices from Jool..

Back to the skittles. Another close round but Charlottes team pipped her Husband Ian's team by a few skittles. After throwing dice for the alcoholic prize Gail won by throwing a 12.. President Geoff was not happy as he had just thrown an 11.

Another game of Play your cards right And it was Annie's turn to beat the cards for £19. Unfortunately without the help of Jools the cards won.. Lucky for Mandie, as she correctly finished the game and scoped the jackpot!!

With a massive raffle of over 20 prizes lots went home with smiles on their faces, especially Anne P and little Jools...

The three top scores, 21 average over three games were Gail, An-drew and Vicki F who all got a bottle of wine!!

All in all a great team effort to have a fun evening, loads of laughs and raising £160 for the club account!!!

Even Golds had a smile on his face, and he hates skittles. Xx

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President Geoff’s

end of year

‘bit of a do!’

Have you booked your tickets yet and

don’t forget friends and family who

would enjoy the event with us

Good afternoon Fellow Rotarians,

We’ve been asked by the organisers of the Swindon Old Town parade if any of us could help marshal the parade when it makes it way around Old Town for an hour.

This will be taking place on 12th June 2016 (Next Sunday) at 11:00am – 12:00pm.

Quite a few of us did it last year and it was great way to spend an hour on a Sunday morning.

Please could let me know asap as the Old Town Parade committee need to confirm marshal numbers.

Kind regards, Rotarian Elliott Causton

The list of Hosts has now been entered on the Swindon Phoenix Website through to 11 January. Please check to see where you are listed and please let me know asap if you have a host and who they are. Please remember there are no speakers on Council and B&F nights and the club will only pay for ONE guest meal when we have a guest speaker.

If the date you have been allocated is not suitable then please speak to a fellow Swindon Phoenix Ro-tarian and arrange a swap but please let me have all the information to update website.

The link below should take you to the Club homepage.

http://www.rotary-ribi.org/clubs/diary.php?ClubID=2089

Paul Parfrey

Emails in that even tho they went to all members you may have missed!

We have pleasure in attaching our annual “Come Dine With Oakfield” invitation to be held here on Wednesday 13th July 2016. This event has grown year on year and this year is no exception. In recognition of the 2016 Sum-mer Olympics you are cordially invited to enjoy a three course buffet style meal for a donation of £15per head.

The event will begin with a guided tour and sample activities followed by canapes. We hope you are able to attend and help celebrate the hard work of the Year 10 students overseeing this event.

Please reply by return to confirm your attendance. We look forward to hearing from you. Kind Regards

Michelle Webb Senior Business & Administration Manager Oakfield Project Marlowe Avenue Swindon, SN3 3HQ

Tel: 01793 953530 **Note this is on a Club day BUT it may be a lunch time event—the Editor does not know, suggest speak to Rtn Paul Wainwright for more detail

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What do boys do when they reach 7……………………….TEEE

… yeah, they fly a kite and just look…... see here that Grumpy can still get it up !

Here he is on his birthday playing when he should have been setting up the tents etc for

his Party Guests

Many Happy Returns Grumpy

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Email in from PP Pail Parfrey

Yep...its erection time again for the Dragon Boat Team Marquees. This year we are going to erect 2 of the Phoenix 12m x 6m marquees for the

teams.

But instead of doing this on Sunday morning of the event the DB committee agreed to do this on the Saturday evening of the 25th. CRUNCH Catering and Dragon Boat Events are also setting up on the Saturday.

We are looking for at least 6 people to be availa-ble for a few hours from 6pm on Saturday 25 June so I have sent this email to those consid-ered suitable and practically minded to be able to assist in a large erection.......

Please let me know if you are available.

Many thanks Paul

Editors note; within half an hour of this email going out I saw that two positive reply's were in already thanks Steve Coleman and Chris Sims for such instant support! (we will

also be marking out Stall positions that evening too)

Email from PP John Fisher

Dear President/members

The Dragon Boat Race is almost upon us and after the committee meeting on Thursday 2nd June 2016 we now have a time and date when we hope as many members/partners etc will assist in delivering around 1500 DBR flyers to residential homes around the Coate Water area to include parts of Liden, Eldene and The Parks as well as the new estates situated around the Hospital.

We intend to meet at The Sun Inn at Coate at 1830 (630pm) on Tuesday 14th June 2016. Once we have dis-tributed the posters then hopefully everyone will come back to The Sun Inn for food and drinks if they so wish. Nothing will be booked in relation to food so everyone can get what they want it they so wish.

Your committee looks forward to seeing as many as pos-sible at the Sun, a Round Robin will go round at Club next week. Opportunity for a fun and good fellow-ship night promoting the DBR.

Many thanks

John

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Black bouys

Americans just will not get this joke due to the way they pronounce ‘Bouys’

Warning this joke is considered unsuitable for certain folk and you may be one of them ...if so don’t read it

South African Dutchman Van der Merwe had never been out of South Africa.

While on holiday in Australia he decided to visit Bondi Beach.

As he sat on the beach looking out to sea he saw a long line of black dots out in the water and said to an Aussie, who was sitting close by,

"What are all those little black things out there?"

"They're buoys," said the Aussie.

"Boys?" replied Van der Merwe. "What are they doing out there?"

"Holding up the shark net," the Aussie told him.

"Blinkin great country man" said Van der Merwe, deeply impressed, "We'd never get away with that at home".

You were warned! and the sender remains anony-mous! ………..Thanks Andrew!!

The Irish Stammer

A very attractive young speech therapist was getting absolutely nowhere with her Stammer-er's Action Group.

She had tried every technique in the book, but still they stammered and stuttered.

Finally, totally exasperated, she said; "If any of you can tell me where you were born, without stuttering, I will have wild and passionate sex with you until your muscles ache and your eyes water."

The Englishman immediately piped up; "B-b-b-b-b-b-b-irmingham", he said.

Jokes

‘on the B

irdy’s

win

g’ "That's no use, Trevor" said the speech thera-pist, "Who's next?"

The Scotsman raised his hand and blurted out; "G-g-g-g-g-g-gl-lasgow".

"That's no better either, Hamish."

"Now, how about you, Paddy?"

The Irishman took a deep breath, counted to five and eventually blurted out; "London".

"Brilliant, Paddy!" said the speech therapist and immediately set about living up to her promise.

After 10 minutes of steamy sex, Paddy said;.........

………."d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-erry."

Thank you Conrad Pike for this one (I gotta say it only just made it past the censor!)

God Loves Blondes A blonde finds herself in serious trouble. Her business has gone bust and she's in dire financial straits.

She's desperate so she decides to ask God for help. She begins to pray... "God, please help me. I've lost my business and if I don't get some money,I'm going to lose my house as well.

Please let me win the lottery." Lottery night comes, and somebody else wins. She again prays... "God, please let me win the lottery!

I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well." Lottery night comes and she still has no luck. Once again, she prays... "My God, why have You for-saken me? I've lost my business, my house, and my car.

My children are starving.

I don't often ask you for help, and I've always been a good servant to You. PLEASE let me win the lottery just this one time so I can get my life back in order."

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open.

The blonde is overwhelmed by the Voice of God, Him-self....

"Sweetheart, work with Me on this....Buy a ticket."

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Sunday 26th June

Our 4th Dragon Boat Race 2016

Coate Water

The

Object of Rotary is to encourage and foster the ideal of ser-

vice as a basis of worthy enterprise and, in particular, to en-

courage and foster:

1)The development of acquaintance as an opportunity for

service;

2) High ethical standards in business and professions, the

recognition of the worthiness of all useful occupations, and

the dignifying of each Rotarian’s occupation as an opportunity

to serve society;

3) The application of the ideal of service in each Rotarian’s

personal, business, and community life;

4) The advancement of international understanding, goodwill,

and peace through a world fellowship of business and profes-

sional persons united in the ideal of service.

That’s all Folks !- but remember, we are a

Rotary Club of the 21st Century

Find more information on Swindon Phoenix Rotary on your pc;

Just control + click on these hyper links below

swindonphoenixrotary.org.uk

Previous bulletins thephoenixbulletin.weebly.com

Our Santa Run swindonsanta.org.uk

Dragon Boat Event www.dragonboatswindon.org.uk

Ffind us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/SwindonPhoenixRotary?ref=hl

On twitter https://twitter.com

Fri 1st July 2016

President’s

End Of Year Ball