document resume title - eric resume. cs 511 745. ... unit plan 26 detailed lesson plans for two days...

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ABSTRACT

DOCUMENT RESUME

CS 511 745

Year 6 Planning Exemplification 2. National LiteracyStrategy.

Department for Education and Skills, London (England).DfES-0799/20012001-12-0049p

Department for Education and Skills (DfES), PROLOG, P.O. Box5050, Sherwood Park, Annesley, Notts NG15 ODJ, UnitedKingdom, England. Tel: 0845 6022260; Fax: 0845 6033360; e-mail: [email protected]; Web site: http://www.dfes.gov.uk/.For full text: http://www.standards.dfee.gov.uk/midbins/literacy/Y6Planning2.PDF.Guides Classroom Teacher (052)

EDRS Price MF01/PCO2 Plus Postage.British National Curriculum; Grade 6; Intermediate Grades;Lesson Plans; *Persuasive Discourse; *Poetry; Units of Study;*Writing (Composition); *Writing Instruction; *WritingProcesses

England; National Literacy Strategy (England)

Second in a series of booklets designed to assist Year 6teachers with planning instruction to meet objectives of the NationalLiteracy Strategy, this booklet reproduces the medium-term planning for theAutumn and Spring Terms 2001-2002 and contains detailed planning for afurther Autumn Term unit (report Writing) and two for the Spring Term (Poetryand Argument). The introduction offers background and context, Year 6 termlyplanning, short-term planning, and target statements for reading and forwriting. Each unit (report writing, poetry, and argument) offers frameworkobjectives, unit plans, detailed lessons and transcripts of one or more days.Resources are offered for the report writing and argument units. (RS)

Reproductions supplied by EDRS are the best that can be madefrom the original document.

The NationalLiteracy Strategy

.00

Year 6Planning Exemplification 2

U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATIONOffice of Educational Research and Improvement

EDUCATIONAL RESOURCES INFORMATIONCENTER (ERIC)

This document has been reproduced asreceived from the person or organizationoriginating it.Minor changes have been made toimprove reproduction quality.

Points of view or opinions stated in thisdocument do not necessarily representofficial OERI position or policy.

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0 Raising11 StandardsStandards and Effectiveness Unit

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department for

education and skillscreating opportunity, releasing potential, achieving excellence

2

Year 6 Teachers

Status: Recommended

Date of issue: 09/01Ref: DIES 0729/2001

xcellencein schools

Contents

Introduction

Background and context 2

Year 6 Term ly planning 3

Short-term planning 4

Target statements for reading 5

Target statements for writing 6

Year 6 Term 1 Unit 7 Report

Framework objectives 7

Unit plan 8

Features of a report text 9

Resources 10

Detailed lesson plans for two days 18

Transcripts of lessons for two days 20

Year 6 Term 2 Unit 1 Poetry


Unit plan 26


Transcript of lesson for one day 29

Year 6 Term 2 Unit 3 Argument


Unit plan 32

Features of a discussion text 33

Resources 34


Transcripts of lessons for two days 44

The National Literacy Strategy

2

Background and context

This is the second in a series of booklets designed to assist

Year 6 teachers (particularly supply teachers and those new

to the year group) with planning. The first booklet, Year 6

Planning Exemplification (DfES 0729/2001), outlined the

basic principles underpinning medium-term planning in

literacy and showed how this could be exemplified for the

year 2001-2. The booklet also contained detailed planning

for two units on narrative writing in the Autumn Term.

This booklet reproduces the medium-term planning for the

Autumn and Spring Terms 2001-2 and contains detailed

planning for a further Autumn Term unit (Report writing) and

two for the Spring Term (Poetry and Argument). Material for

the remainder of the year will be available in February 2002.

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Year 6 Termly planning

Notes

Units 2 and 5 on narrative

writing could be placed

together in a five-week block.

0 Units 4, 6 and 7 link to other

areas of the curriculum.

Notes

0 Units 2 and 4 on narrative

writing could be placed

together in a five-week block.

Units 3 and 5 link to other

areas of the curriculum.

0 As this is such a short term,

objectives in brackets could

be moved to the Summer

Term.

Year 6 Term 1 - Autumn Term 2001

Unit Wks Objectives Text Outcome

1 Poetry 2 Text: 3, 4, 5,10

Sentence: 1

Word: 1-3, 7

Work of two poets 2 poems

1 presentation

2 Narrative writing 2 Text: 7

Sentence: 1, 5

Word: 1-4

Class novel and

extracts

1 narrative

3 Media / plays 2 Text: 1, 2, 6, 9

Sentence: 6

Word: 1-3, 9

Class novel

and video version

1 narrative

1 scene

4 Journalistic 2 Text: 8, 12, 15, 16, 18

Sentence: 1, 4

Word: 6, 8

Curriculum subject /

current events

Newspaper articles

5 Narrative writing 3 Text: 7

Sentence: 1, 4, 5

Word: 1-3, 6

Class novel and

extracts

2 narratives

6 Biography /autobiography

2 Text: 3, 4, 5, 11,14

Sentence: 5

Word: 1-3, 10

Biography/autobiography

Biographical /

autobiographical

writing

7 Reports 2 Text: 13,17

Sentence: 2, 3

Word: 1-4

Curriculum subject Report

Year 6 Term 2 Spring Term 2002

Unit Wks Objectives Text Outcome

1 Poetry 1 Text: 3, 4, 5, 6, 9 Range of forms Interpretation

of poems

2 Narrativewriting

2 Text: 1, (7), 11, (13)

Sentence: 3

Word: 1, 2, 3, 6

Class novel and

extracts

1 narrative

3 Argument 2 Text: 15, 16, 18,19

Sentence: 5

Word: 8

Balanced reports Debate

1 persuasive and

1 discursive text

4 Narrativewriting

3 Text: 2, 8, 9, 10, (12), 14

Sentence: 3

Word: 1-3, 7

Class novel and

extracts

2 narratives

5 Formal 2 Text: 17, 20

Sentence: 1, 2, 4

Word: 4, 5

Examples of

'formal' writing and

presentation

1 'official' document

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Short-term planning

The purpose of these lesson plan examples is to reduce the burden of planning for teachers while

leaving them the flexibility to:

teach texts of their choice;

integrate literacy into the rest of the curriculum and vice versa.

These Year 6 unit and lesson plans:

* represent teaching and learning on the basis of two over-arching concepts: analysis and

application. Analysis involves the reading and investigation of texts at all levels (text, sentence

and word) and the derivation from these texts of the principles of effective writing. This takes

place in both shared reading and independent time. Application, which takes place in shared

writing and independent time, puts these principles into practice and includes teacher

demonstration, 'teacher as scribe', supported composition and independent writing (paired or

individual);

* provide the detail for a two-day cycle of teaching so that teachers can continue the unit using

the two-day model;

* employ a particularly fast pace of learning because the content of most Year 6 objectives has

been met in earlier years;

place a high value on interactivity between the children and the teacher and amongst the

children. Speaking and listening is the medium through which much of the learning is

expected to take place;

provide the basis for in-depth teaching which stimulates children's interest in reading and writing;

expect all the children (apart from the guided group) to be engaged in the same reading,

writing or discussion activity (though possibly differentiated by text or outcome) during

independent time. It is not appropriate for children to be using worksheets;

place as much importance on guided reading and writing in Year 6 as in other years. However,

where test practice takes place in independent time, it is expected that there will be no guided

reading and writing group;

* provide opportunities for investigating spelling conventions in the literacy hour and applying

word level knowledge and skill in reading and writing. However, focused spelling, like mental

mathematics, needs concentrated, daily attention so that writing words correctly, with a fluent

hand, becomes automatic and children's cognitive capacity is released to attend to the

content and form of their writing. Ten minutes every day can be spent on sharpening up

children's spelling knowledge (Year 6, Terms 1, 2 and 3, objectives W2 and W3);

* include all elements of the literacy hour in each lesson but sometimes adjust the timings in

order to teach the objectives most effectively;

* assume that children will be reading and writing at other times of the day, in addition to the

literacy hour, including at home;

assume that the teacher will be reading a novel (or other texts) to the class on a regular basis

outside the literacy hour throughout each term;

give some opportunity for test practice.

Although detailed, these exemplar lesson plans cannot indicate the specific needs of every child.

For instance, those with sensory impairment might need support to access text, as might those

who are learning English as an additional language. (See NLS files: 'Supporting pupils with special

educational needs in the Literacy Hour' Module 3, Handouts 14 and 16, and 'Supporting pupils

learning English as an additional language'.)

The plans can be adapted for use in mixed-age classes.


4

Target statements for readingYear 6 as for Year 5 and:

Word recognition andphonic knowledge

* Use knowledge of word derivations and word formation, e.g. prefixes,acronyms and letter omission, to construct the meaning of words in context. *0

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Grammatical knowledge * Apply grammatical knowledge when re-reading complex sentences with

appropriate phrasing and intonation.

0 Read fluently, understanding and using more sophisticated punctuation

marks, e.g. colon, semi-colon, parenthetic commas, dashes, brackets.* Understand the use of connectives as signposts to indicate a change of

tone, voice or opinion and apply this to maintain understanding when

reading specific types of text.

Use of context * Identify the correct language conventions and features of different texttypes to sustain understanding when reading extended texts or from a

range of sources.

Knowing how texts work * Identify and describe the styles of individual writers and poets.

a Use secure undergtanding of the language features and structures of the

full range of non-fiction text types to support understanding when reading.

Interpretation andresponse

Literary texts

Non-fiction

* Distinguish between implicit and explicit points of view.

0 Comment on the success of texts and writers in evoking particular

responses in the reader.

* Analyse how messages, moods, feelings and attitudes are conveyed in

poetry and prose using inference and deduction and making reference to

the text.

Comment critically on the overall impact of poetry or prose with reference

to a range of features, e.g. use of language, development of themes.

* Secure the skills of skimming, scanning and efficient reading so that

research is fast and effective.

* Appraise a text quickly and effectively.

Attitude * Declare and justify personal preferences for writers and types of text.* Decide on the quality/usefulness of a text by skim reading to gain an

overall impression using bibliographic knowledge.* Articulate personal responses to literature, identifying how and why the

text affects the reader.


5

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Target statements for writingYear 6 as for Year 5 and:

Spelling Use independent spelling strategies, including:building up spellings by syllabic parts, using known prefixes, suffixes and

common letter strings;* applying knowledge of spelling rules and exceptions;

building words from other known words, and from awareness of the

meaning or derivation of words;

* using dictionaries and IT spell-checks;using visual skills, e.g. recognising common letter strings and checking

critical features.

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Style: language

effects

0 Use well-chosen phrases such as adverbials, adventurous and precise

vocabulary and other techniques such as sentence variation or figurative

language, to contribute to the effectiveness of writing.

Style: sentence

construction

Secure control of complex sentences, understanding how clauses can be

manipulated to achieve different effects.

Write sentences in an appropriate and effective style, in relation to text type,

audience and purpose.

Use conditional sentences and the passive voice.

Punctuation 0 Demarcate most sentences correctly with Year 5 range of punctuation marks.

Secure the use of the comma to demarcate grammatical boundaries and to

separate elements of a sentence, such as short phrases, clauses or items in

a list.

Begin to make use of other punctuation marks such as the semi-colon.

Purpose andorganisation

0 Use pronouns and tenses accurately to establish textual cohesion and to

avoid ambiguity.

* Use a range of connecting words and phrases appropriately in different

text types.Write with appropriate pace.In narrative, create characters with some significant interaction between

them, through direct or reported speech, building characterisation through

action, description, and characters' responses.* In non-fiction structures, write appropriately, including relevant introduction

and clear presentation of information or points which lead to a well-drawn

conclusion, often relating the subject to the reader.

° Use paragraphs to distinguish the structure of different texts.

Relate events logically so that writing is coherent and provides good

coverage of the main topic.

* Use the range of different types of connectives to write coherently.Keep writing lively, to interest, inform or persuade the reader through, forexample, the ways in which characters or events are developed and

commented upon or by providing persuasive reasons with examples.

Process ° Plan quickly and effectively, including the conclusion.Polish own poetry for performance.

Use IT to plan, revise and edit writing for publication.

* Discuss and select appropriate style and form to suit specific purpose and

audience, drawing on knowledge of different texts.


6

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Framework objectives

Text

13. to secure understanding of the features of non-chronological reports:

introductions to orientate reader;

use of generalisations to categorise;

language to describe and differentiate;

* impersonal language;

* mostly present tense;

17. to write non-chronological reports linked to other subjects;

Sentence

2: to revise earlier work on verbs and to understand the terms active and passive; being able

to transform a sentence from active to passive, and vice versa;

3. to note and discuss how changes from active to passive affect the word order and sense of

a sentence;

Word

1. to identify mis-spelt words in own writing; to keep individual lists (e.g. spelling logs); to learn

to spell them;

2. to use known spellings as a basis for spelling other words with similar patterns or related

meanings;

3. to use independent spelling strategies, including:

building up spellings by syllabic parts, using known prefixes, suffixes and common letter

strings;

* applying knowledge of spelling rules and exceptions;

* building words from other known words, and from awareness of the meaning or

derivations of words;

* using dictionaries and IT spell-checks;

6 using visual skills, e.g. recognising common letter strings and checking critical features

(i.e. does it look right, shape, length, etc.);

4. to revise and extend work on spelling patterns for unstressed vowels in polysyllabic words

from Year 5 Term 3;

OutcomesTwo written reports and reading and writing test practice paper

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Features of a report text

Purpose

To describe the way things are

Generic text structure

an opening, general classification, e.g. Sparrows are birds

more technical classification (optional), e.g. Their Latin name is ...

a number of paragraphs about different aspects of the subject -these could be arranged in

any order

* a description of their phenomenon, including some or all of its:

- qualities, e.g. Birds have feathers

- parts and their function, e.g. The beak is ...

- habits/behaviours or uses, e.g. They nest in ...

* conclusion - an ending comment

Sentence/word level features

focus on generic participant, e.g. sparrows in general, not Sam the sparrow

use of present tense

use of some passive constructions

use of the impersonal voice (third person)

use of words which generalise

use of technical vocabulary relevant to the subject

use of descriptive but factual language

Writer's knowledge

* plan under paragraph headings in note form

o use a range of resources to gather information

select facts from a range of sources to interest the

reader, e.g. books, CD-ROM, interviews

possible use of a question in the title to intrigue the

reader, e.g. Yetis - do they exist?

be clear, so that you do not muddle the reader

o open by explaining very clearly what you are writing about -take an

angle to draw the reader in

use tables, pictures, diagrams to add more information

possibly end by relating the subject to the reader, e.g. Many people like whales ...

reports are factual but you could add comments or use questions to engage the reader

re-read as if you knew nothing about the subject to check that you have put the information

across successfully

Skeleton-frame forplanning a report

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9

Cheetahs

Cheetahs are members of the cat family and are the world's fastest land animals.

They inhabit open grasslands and scrub in Africa, southern Asia and the

Middle East.

Cheetahs are often mistaken for leopards and have many similar features.

Their distinguishing marks are the long, teardrop-shaped lines on each side

of the nose from the corner of the eyes to the mouth.

The animals have muscular and powerful bodies which are aerodynamically

perfect for short, fast runs. Their bendy backs keep the body flexible as they

sprint. They can accelerate from standing to 40 mph in three strides and to a

full speed of 70 mph within seconds. Cheetahs' feet are like running shoes

and have grips and spikes to dig into the ground. The grips are special ridges

on the animals' footpads and the claws act as spikes. These claws stay out

all the time. This is different from other cats, whose claws tuck away in

special sheaths in their paws.

Cheetahs are carnivores and eat gazelle and small antelope. A long tail helps

the cheetah keep its balance as it swerves after its prey, using large eyes that

point forward to judge distances accurately. Once the cheetah has pounced,

the victim is gripped by the throat to stop it breathing. However, the cheetah

has weak jaws and small teeth and cannot always protect its kills or its young,

especially if tired out after a run.

Female cheetahs give birth to an average of three young that they rear by

themselves. Once fully grown, the animals usually live alone, though males

sometimes form small groups. Most cheetahs live about twelve years.

Cheetahs are now an endangered species and many conservationists are trying

to help protect the habitats of these interesting creatures.


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nP

arag

raph

3Id

entif

icat

ion

iC

heet

ahsi

re o

ften

mis

take

n)fo

r le

opar

ds a

nd h

ave

man

sim

ila fe

atur

es.

The

irOis

tingu

ishi

ng m

arks

are

the

long

, tea

rdro

p-sh

aped

line

s)on

eac

h si

deof

the

nose

from

the

corn

er o

f the

eye

s to

the

mou

th.

'Pre

sent

texs

eIs

xper

sona

l voi

ce: t

hird

per

son

Zes

crip

tiut b

ut {

Act

ual L

in6u

A6e

Par

agra

ph 4

Spe

edT

he a

nim

als

ha(m

uscu

lar

and

pow

erfu

l bod

ies

ich

are

aero

dyna

mic

ally

perf

ect f

or s

hort

, fas

t run

s. T

heir(

bend

y ba

cks

eep

the

body

(fle

xibl

as th

eyS

pelli

ng: u

nstr

esse

d uo

wel

(The

y ca

n ac

cele

rate

)fro

m s

tand

ing

to 4

0 m

ph in

thre

e st

rides

and

to a

full

spee

d of

70

mph

with

in s

econ

ds. C

heet

ahs'

feet

are

Oik

e ru

nnin

g sh

oes)

----

4---

Ze.

scrip

tin b

ut fa

ctua

l lak

i6ua

6e

Par

agra

ph 5

Die

t and

hun

ting

prey

Par

agra

ph 6

Life

cyc

le

Con

clus

ion

Con

serv

atio

n

and

have

grip

s an

d sp

ikes

to d

ig in

to th

e gr

ound

. The

grip

s ar

e sp

ecia

l *dg

eson

the

anim

als'

(foo

tpad

s)an

d th

e cl

aws

act a

s sp

ikes

. The

se c

law

s st

ay o

utal

l the

tim

e. T

his

is d

iff r

ent f

rom

oth

er c

ats,

who

se(c

law

s)tu

ck a

way

insp

ecia

l she

aths

in th

eirO

aws)

uoca

bulii

r8're

sent

teas

e.

Che

etah

s ar

e(ca

miv

ores

)and

eat

gaz

elle

and

sm

all a

ntel

ope.

A lo

ng ta

il he

lps

the

chee

tah

keep

its

bala

nce

as it

fter

its p

rey,

usi

ng la

rge

eyes

that

liChi

tiCA

t UO

CA

bUtA

Y"

Yre

llitt6

: uns

tres

sed

uoya

l

poin

t for

war

d to

judg

e di

stan

ces

accu

rate

ly. O

nce

the

chee

tah

has(

poun

ced)

Ze.

...sc

riptiu

t but

fact

ual l

Ast

6mA

6e

the

vict

im is

ried

by

the

thro

at to

sto

p it

brea

thin

g. H

owev

er, t

he c

heet

ahha

s w

eakG

aws

and

smal

l tee

th)a

nd c

anno

t alw

ays

prot

ect i

ts k

ills

or it

s yo

ung,

espe

cial

ly if

tire

d ou

t afte

r a

run.

'Pas

sive

coi

tstr

uctio

a: th

is k

elps

the

read

er s

et th

e A

ttack

'fro

m th

e ui

ctis

t's p

oint

of v

iew

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ale)

chee

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Oto

an

aver

age

of th

ree

youn

g th

at th

ey

t em

selv

es. O

nce

full

grow

n, th

e an

imal

s us

ualll

ive

alon

e, th

ough

s m

etim

es fo

rm s

mal

gro

ups.

Mos

t hee

ts

live

abou

t tw

elve

yea

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ltitic

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hich

gen

eral

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man

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AIL

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S302

:111

0S31

The British barn owl

The barn owl is one of the most popular birds in Britain but is now extremely rare.

The bird favours open habitats such as grassland, hedgerows, the edges of fields or

woodlands, stubble fields, drainage ditches and farmyards.

The barn owl is a carnivore and hunts for its favourite diet of small mammals and

birds. It usually flies slowly back and forth, about three metres above the ground,

using its large eyes and sensitive hearing to spot likely prey. If suitable perches,

such as fence posts, are available, the bird may save energy by hunting from these.

Once it has swooped silently down, a hooked beak tears into the victim. Food is

often swallowed whole and the indigestible parts, such as the bones and fur,

are regurgitated in the form of pellets.

When seen in flight, the general impression is of a large white bird. However, the

upper parts are a beautiful golden buff colour, delicately marked in varying shades

of buff and grey. It is only the face, breast and undersides that are mostly white.

After choosing a suitable hole in a tree or a ledge in an old building, the female

barn owl lays between four and seven eggs in April each year. The owlets are fully

developed after ten weeks and leave the nest after about fourteen weeks, by which

time they must be able to survive alone. As many as one in four young barn owls

die within a year for a variety of reasons.

The number of barn owls in Britain is decreasing. There are now fewer habitats

where they can find mice, voles and other prey. In some areas, owls have been

affected by chemicals and cannot lay proper eggs. This means that they cannot

breed and increase their numbers. In addition, many birds have been killed

accidentally as they fly across major roads and motorways.

The barn owl is one of nature's most graceful hunters. Many organisations in

Britain, such as the Barn Owl Trust in the South West, are working towards their

conservation.


12 4,

Tex

t lev

el

Titl

e

Intr

oduc

tion

Cla

ssifi

catio

n

Par

agra

ph 2

Hab

itat

Par

agra

ph 3

Die

t and

hun

ting

prey

Par

agra

ph 4

App

eara

nce

Par

agra

ph 5

Nes

ting

and

babi

es

Par

agra

ph 6

Pro

blem

s

Con

clus

ion

Con

serv

atio

n

Sen

tenc

e / w

ord

leve

l

The

Brit

ish

barn

ow

lN

orot

s &

kick

gen

eral

ise

Z)e

scrip

tive

but {

actu

al la

pt6a

Me

The

bar

n ow

l is(

one

of)t

he m

ost p

opul

ar b

irds

in B

ritai

n bu

t is

now

(ext

rem

ely

rare

)

The

bird

(fav

ours

ope

n ha

bita

ts s

uch

as g

rass

land

, hed

gero

ws,

the

edge

s of

fiel

ds o

r

woo

dlan

ds, s

tubb

le fi

elds

, dra

inag

e di

tche

s an

d fa

rmya

rds)

,IN

OY

AS

Nitt

CI&

gen

eral

ise

Uoc

Abr

ilAY

8

The

bar

n iw

l is

a(ca

rniv

ore)

and

hunt

s fo

r its

favo

urite

die

t of s

mal

l mam

mal

s an

d

'Pre

sent

tens

e.

bird

s. It

slow

ly b

ack

and

fort

h, a

bout

thre

e m

etre

s ab

ove

the

grou

nd,

rge

eyes

and

sen

sitiv

e he

arin

g to

spo

t lik

ely

prey

. If s

uita

ble

erch

es

such

as

fenc

e po

sts,

are

ava

ilabl

e, th

e bi

rd m

ay s

ave

ener

gy b

y hu

ntin

g fr

om th

ese.

dow

n, a

into

the

vict

im. F

ood

is

hole

and

ts,

suc

h as

the

bone

s an

d fu

r,

the

form

of p

elle

ts.

ws

curl

pti e

but

fact

ual l

anya

,5e.

Tec

kkic

atl'A

ssiu

t con

stru

ctio

n""

ikii(

"8W

hen

seen

in fl

ight

, the

gen

eral

impr

essi

on is

of a

larg

e w

hite

bird

. How

ever

, the

uppe

r pa

rts)

are

a be

autif

ul g

olde

n bu

ff co

lour

, del

icat

ely

mar

ked

in v

aryi

ng s

hade

s

of b

uff a

nd g

rey.

It is

onl

y th

e

'Pre

sent

tutu

CtIS

Man

deaM

ED

hat a

re m

ostly

whi

te.

Ted

vtic

Al v

ocab

alar

6

ow

Afte

r ch

oosi

ain

a tr

ee o

r a

ledg

e in

an

of

barn

ow

l(

deve

lope

d af

ter

ten

wee

ks a

nd e

ave

the

nest

afte

r(ab

out f

ourt

een

wee

ks, b

y w

hich

time(

they

mus

t be

able

to s

urvi

ve)a

lone

. As

man

y as

one

four

you

ng b

arn

owls

with

in a

yea

r fo

varie

ty o

f rea

sons

.kO

ov,o

ls w

hich

. gen

eral

ise

ding

, the

betw

een

for

r nd

sev

en e

ggs

in A

pril

each

yea

r. T

hear

e fu

lly

'Pre

sent

tutu

The

num

ber

of

Impe

rson

al v

oice

: tki

rd p

erso

n

owls

in B

ritai

n is

dec

reas

ing.

The

re a

re n

ow fe

wer

hab

itats

mic

e, v

oles

and

oth

er p

re In

(som

e ar

eas,

ow

ls(h

ave

been

sca

nnot

lay

prop

er e

ggs.

Thi

sca

ns th

at th

ey c

anno

t

whe

r

affe

cted

)by(

chem

ical

an

tzrz

). n

d111

2=th

iten

tally

as

they

fly

'Pre

sent

tutu

.

umbe

rs. I

n ad

ditio

n,ha

ve b

een

kille

rocs

maj

or r

oads

and

mot

orw

ay

Tic

lutic

at u

ocA

buta

ir

The

bar

n ow

l(s o

ne)o

f nat

ure'

s m

os

Brit

ain,

suc

h as

the\

Bam

Ow

l Tru

st in

the

Sou

th W

es

!Con

serv

atio

n)ge

nera

lise

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hrut

iCA

t uO

tAtn

itAY

8

Man

y

"rec

kitic

at u

ocab

u1ek

y8

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lotic

al u

ocA

btat

ew

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sent

tens

e

of tk

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AY

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Ap.

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desc

riptiv

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ut a

ctua

l

TA

SS

iUG

C.0

41.S

triA

CtiO

it

kOor

ets

polti

ck g

ener

alis

e

orga

nisa

tions

in

are

wor

king

tow

ards

thei

r

W5e

scrip

tiue

but t

actu

al la

kty4

6e,

ST C

OPY

AV

AIL

AB

LE

soH

nosa

l

B.M.X.

The B.M.X. (Bicycle Motor Cross) is a bike designed and built for specific

purposes.

The bike is generally made of steel so that it is strong and will not bend

under the enormous stress that it is subjected to when being ridden. Some

bikes, designed especially for B.M.X. racing, are made of aluminium

because it is lighter.

The main difference between B.M.X. and other bikes is the undersized

frame which allows maximum manoeuvrability. The wheels are also

small, with wide tyres. Most have a gyro system of bearings and pulleys

that allows the large, curved handlebars to spin 360 degrees. This enables

the rider to perform dare-devil stunts and tricks. The saddle is low and

not padded for comfort because the bike is often ridden by standing on

the pedals or on strong, steel stunt pegs that are found on either side of

the front and back wheels.

There are now centres in the country where B.M.X. riders take part in

competitions. There is even an event called the 'X Games' which is the

Olympics of the extreme sports world. Many young riders challenge

themselves to imitate the daring and complicated exercises performed

by the professionals.

Some bikers ride up and down slopes that look like larger versions of

skateboard ramps, executing difficult jumps and spins at both ends.

Others perform their tricks on flat ground, balancing on small areas of the

bike itself. Specially designed B.M.X. bikes, with large, chunky tyres to

provide more definite grip, race ten abreast over dirt tracks. There are now

a number of separate areas where the bikes can be ridden safely away from

cars and pedestrians.

B.M.X. bikes provide riders with the opportunity to use their skill and

imagination to carry out gymnastic and artistic stunts.


14

Tex

t lev

el

Titl

e

Intr

oduc

tion

Cla

ssifi

catio

n

Par

agra

ph 2

Mat

eria

ls

Par

agra

ph 3

Par

ts o

f the

bik

e

Par

agra

ph 4

Com

petit

ion

Par

agra

ph 4

Diff

eren

t act

iviti

es

Con

clus

ion

End

com

men

t

B.M

.X.

The

B.M

.X. (

Bic

ycle

Mot

or C

ross

)6s

a bi

ke d

esig

ned)

and

built

for

spec

ific

purp

oses

.'P

assi

ve C

OK

StY

latiO

N.

Sen

tenc

e / w

ord

leve

l

The

bik

4s g

ener

ally

mad

e)of

(ste

el s

o th

at it

is s

tron

g an

d w

ill n

ot b

end

;,

/NO

VA

Ski

ck 6

CK

LY

WIS

C

unde

r th

e en

orm

ous

stre

ss th

at it

is s

ute

d to

whe

n be

ing

ridde

n.oi

rC.

bike

s, d

esig

ned

espe

cial

ly fo

r B

.M.X

. rac

ing,

ade

ofbe

caus

e it

is li

ghte

r.S

pelli

ng: U

K.S

tfeaS

SC

A01

04C

1

The

mai

nOiff

eren

cObe

een

B.M

.X. a

nd o

th-

ikes

is th

e un

ders

ized

fram

e w

hicK

allo

ws

max

imum

man

oeuv

rab.

The

smal

l, w

ith w

ide

tyre

s. M

ost h

ave

ath

at a

llow

s th

e la

rge,

cur

ve4a

ndle

bars

to s

pin

360

degr

ees.

the

rider

to p

erfo

rm d

are-

devi

l stu

nts

and

tric

ks. T

heno

t pad

ded

for

com

fort

bec

ause

the

bike

@ o

ften

ridde

by

stan

ding

on

the

edal

or

on s

tron

g, s

teel

stu

nt p

egs)

that

are

foun

d o

eith

er s

ide

ofth

e fr

ont

d b.

eels

."P

assi

ut c

onst

ruct

ion

lickn

icnt

voc

abut

arun

stre

ssa

boot

(T

here

are

now

entr

ein

the

coun

try

whe

re B

.M.X

. rid

ers(

take

par

tco

mpe

titio

ns. T

here

is e

ven

an e

vent

cal

led

the

'X G

ames

' whi

ch is

the

Oly

mpi

cs o

f the

ext

rem

e sp

orts

wor

ld.

an y

oung

rid

ers

them

selv

es to

imita

te th

e@ar

ing

and

com

plic

ated

exe

rcis

es)p

erfo

rmed

by th

e pr

ofes

sion

als.

ters

eA

.)or

ds (

kick

6ut

tral

ist

'Pre

sent

tutu

.1C

46tIC

A V

OG

AL7

V(A

Y,

sadd

le

are

also

and

nabl

es

low

an.

Aon

-tin

ite a

rt,

Som

e bi

kers

(rid

e u

and

dow

opes

that

look

like

lar

skat

eboa

rd r

am,@

xecu

tinO

iffic

ult j

umps

and

spi

nO

ther

4erf

orm

thei

r tr

icks

on

flatg

roun

d,io

n sm

all a

reas

of t

hebi

ke it

self.

Spe

cial

ly d

esig

ned

B.M

.X. b

ikes

, with

larg

e, c

hunk

y ty

res

to

kOor

ds

Tia

tKIC

At U

OC

Abl

AIM

8

Tec

hnic

al u

ocab

lar9

Tre

stat

tens

e

gene

ralis

t

5e..s

crip

tiue

but a

ctua

l lan

guag

e

ersi

ons

ofat

bot

h en

ds.

prov

ide

mor

e de

finite

race

abre

ast o

ver

dirt

trac

ks. T

here

are

now

(a n

umbe

r (4

e th

e bi

kes

can

be r

idde

n sa

fely

aw

ay fr

omca

rs a

nd p

stria

ns.

unst

ress

ed u

okcl

/Nor

& (

kick

gut

trA

lise.

B.M

.X. b

ikes

pro

vide

rid

ers

with

the

oppo

rtun

ity to

use

thei

r sk

ill a

ndim

agin

atio

n to

car

ry o

ut(g

ymna

stic

and

art

istic

stu

nts)

ST C

OPY

AV

M

Z)c

scrip

tiue

but {

actu

al la

ngua

ge

,Non

- fin

ite v

erb

'Pre

sent

tens

e

S3O

Hno

spH

Hot deserts

A desert is a region that has less than 250 mm of rain a year. Rainfall often falls in

violent downpours rather than evenly throughout the year.

More than one seventh of the land on earth is desert. Deserts are found all over the

world: in Africa, Australia, Asia, North America and South America. The world's

largest desert, the Sahara, stretches across North Africa from the Red Sea in the east

to the Atlantic Ocean in the west.

Only a quarter of deserts are made of sand. Some are covered in pebbles or bare

rocks. In other areas, shallow lakes have formed after rain. Once these have dried in

the sun, a flat layer of salt crystals is deposited.

There is a huge range of temperature in the desert due to the fact that there are no

clouds. Temperatures have been known to soar as high as 59 degrees Celsius in

Libya and Death Valley, California, though 40 degrees is more usual. An egg could

be fried on the blistering, hot rocks under the desert sun. During the night, the

temperature falls rapidly to below freezing in some places.

Desert plants have to find ingenious ways of adapting to the harsh conditions in a

desert. Long roots probe deep underground for precious water. Leaves have thick

waterproof skins to avoid evaporation. Some plants, like cacti, store water in their

thick stems.

Animals find desert conditions difficult. Some never drink but instead obtain

necessary moisture from plants and other food. Many are nocturnal and rest in

burrows or under rocks during the heat of the day. The gerbil, a popular British pet,

originates in the sandy deserts of Mongolia and northern China.

Underground rivers and streams flow deep beneath deserts, bringing water from

mountains hundreds of miles away. When these rivers reach the surface, an oasis is

formed. Towns and villages are found nearby and people can grow a variety of

plants in the fertile land.

A desert has an inhospitable climate but people, animals and plants have all learned

to adapt and make the most of its resources.


161.r

Tex

t lev

el

Titl

e

Intr

oduc

tion

Cla

ssifi

catio

n

Par

agra

ph 2

Loca

tion

Par

agra

ph 3

Com

posi

tion

Par

agra

ph 4

Tem

pera

ture

Hot

des

erts

41-1

lia9:

uns

tres

sed

u°14

6

A d

eser

t is

a(re

gion

)tha

t has

less

than

250

mm

of r

ain

a ye

ar.(

Rai

nfaI

D

(vio

lent

dow

npou

rs)r

athe

r th

an e

venl

y th

roug

hout

the

year

.

Mor

e th

an o

ne s

even

th o

f the

land

on

eart

h is

des

ert.

Des

erts

wor

ld: i

n A

fric

a, A

ustr

alia

, Asi

a, N

orth

Am

eric

a an

d S

outh

Am

eric

a. T

he w

or

larg

est d

eser

t, th

e S

ahar

a4tr

etch

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Detailed lesson plans for Days 1 and 2:Day 1: shared reading and analysis

Day 2: shared planning for writing

Context

The class had been studying various aspects of rivers in their geography lessons and the

teacher introduced this as the context for writing a report.

Day 1 Shared reading and analysis

1. Introduce a sentence level activity on active and passive verbs in readiness for writing

reports (taken/adapted from Grammar for Writing). Introduce this as an oral game for about

10 minutes so that the whole class can feel confident. Then allow five minutes on white

boards to write some sentences. This can be paired work; each child writes a simple

sentence and the partner changes it to passive. Explain to the children that you will be using

passives later in the week.

2. Tell the children that they are going to look again at a type of writing they explored last year -

a report. Put up the OHT of 'Cheetahs' and read through. Discuss the content for a couple of

minutes.

3. Ask the children for the purpose of report writing (to give information).

4. Read the text again and annotate with the purpose of each paragraph.

5. Refer the children back to the skeleton-frame which they used to write a recount and ask

them what they think a report skeleton-frame should look like. Ensure that they are clear that

the paragraphs are non-chronological. Draw a report skeleton-frame diagram on the board

and name the paragraphs.

Independent work

1. Children work in pairs and annotate the report on the barn owl (Sample Text B) in the same

way as you have done with them on cheetahs.

2. Other reports from books or from the Internet should be available so that more able children

can check that these satisfy the criteria for organising report writing.

3. Five minutes before the end of independent time, ask the children to get into groups (three

pairs to a group) to compare ideas and appoint a spokesperson to feed back to the class in

the plenary.

Plenary

1. As the children feed back, write their ideas onto a skeleton diagram for the barn owl report.

2. The children should then look back at the one they did with you on cheetahs. Do both reports

follow the same format in terms of purpose and organisation?


18

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Day 2 Application: shared planning for writing

1. Remind the children of some work they have been doing in another subject. The facts that

they are going to use should be easily accessible during the lesson. For example, they

might create a 'wall of facts', written on strips of paper.

2. Draw an appropriate number of boxes on the board for the themes the children are likely to

come up with. If the board is small, use a number of pieces of card and fasten them around

the room.

3. Choose children to come out quickly and move the facts from the wall to an appropriate

place in the boxes. Ask them what they will be doing in this exercise. They should realise

that they will be planning what to put into their paragraphs. The children can then give an

overall purpose to each paragraph. It will take a little time but this is necessary to model

the process that a writer must go through. It should be clear from the boxes that each

paragraph will contain a number of related pieces of information. Write the overall theme

above the facts that the children have placed.

4. Discuss what should go in the introduction. Make a note.

5. Produce another report skeleton-frame - like the ones used yesterday. Transfer the themes

to the circles and make a note about the introduction in the centre.

6. Discuss a possible ending comment and note down the idea under the diagram.

Independent/guided work

Children should work in pairs and use large sheets of sugar paper on which you have drawn a

report skeleton-frame. Ask the children to plan the paragraphs for a report on their own

school. The overall purpose/theme of each paragraph should be written in the circle.

Plenary

1. Look at the children's work on the sheets.

2. Ask children to comment first on good examples of report planning.

3. Next work together on any improvements - e.g. look at content that might be better

grouped together, or split up. Share ideas about the content of the introduction and

conclusion. Give advice on the type of information that makes a good introduction or

conclusion.

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20


19

Transcripts of lessons for bays 1 and 2(taught by Year 6 teacher, Pat. Children's responses and contributions omitted)

bay 1- Shared reading and analysisNote: the texts for the shared and independent reading are on pages 10 13.

We're going to start with a game today. It's going to help you understand the difference betweenactive and passive verbs. I'm not going to tell what the difference is now. I think you're going to beable to tell me in a minute - so I challenge you! Let's see I'm going to give you a sentence and thensay it another way in what we call the passive voice. Listen carefully. 'I handed the book to Sam.'[Mimed.] Now listen. I'll say it in the passive. 'Sam was handed the book by me.' The same thing

happened, didn't it, but the way I said it was different. I'll try another. 'Goldilocks cleaned thecottage in the wood.' We call that the active voice. I could also say: 'The cottage in the wood wascleaned by Goldilocks.' That would be the passive voice. [ Wrote 'active' and 'passive' on the board.]Now I'll say one for Naomi and she can turn my sentence around. 'Naomi opened the classroomdoor.' Well done. Who'd like a go? OK, let's go round the room. One of you make up a

sentence and then another change it to the passive voice I'll listen in. Now that one isinteresting. Chloe, you said 'My Mum walked into town.' It didn't work did it? Do you know why?

Brilliant! You've got it, though I think we can do better than say 'it hasn't got a "thing" toturn round'. The sentence Chloe made up didn't have a direct object so we couldn't turn it round andmake it passive. You're doing so well that I think you can use your boards for a couple of minutesand write some sentences in pairs and try writing the passive Now, who's going to acceptmy challenge? Who would like to try to tell us what we mean if the sentence is in the passiveYes, you're right. In the passive, the subject of the sentence is having the action done to it thecat was being chased by the dog. When we write in the active voice, the subject is doing the action

the dog was chasing the cat. I'm going to type up what we have just said because I think we shouldadd it to our grammar board then you can always refer to it. We're going to meet the passive voiceagain on Wednesday.

Do you remember how we read a recount text a biography earlier this term and you helped meanalyse how it was organised and written? You wrote some really good biographies yourselves afterthat. Well, today we are going to continue to study a text type you did last year - a report and weare going to go through the same sort of process. [Switched on OHP cheetahs text.] I'm going toread through the report. Follow carefully Did anyone know anything about cheetahsbefore? That's fascinating, Abdi, you visited the wildlife park when you were living inAfrica, in Somalia? I see here from the conclusion that the cheetah is an endangeredspecies. Latika? Garth? Paula? You're right, there isn't any solidinformation about why cheetahs are endangered. So what do you think the purpose of this piece ofwriting is? Exactly. Anyone who wants basic information would find my report useful,especially as I have organised it carefully to help them. Let's read each paragraph again. [Readintroduction.] This is very short but it has a special purpose. What is that? Yes, it is theintroduction. But can you tell me more? What is the introduction doing? It is saying what acheetah is we call this classifying or defining the subject. It might say something about why thesubject is very well known. It is very general and doesn't have any detail. All that will come later. SoI'll write a note beside it: general remark - definition; no detail. [Wrote] Let's move on. Ahmed,


20ISIEST COPY AVAIIILABLIE

could you read the second paragraph? What is that about? Yes, and how do you

know? Good, so I'll write 'habitat' next to this paragraph. Now what is the subject orpurpose of the third paragraph? Read it to yourselves. There's a tricky word there rememberwhat you have to do with long words like that Yes, Paula, read around each vowel let's

make it shorter by covering the '-ing' at the end OK, have a go nearly there, that last bitis hard to work out - 'dis ting uish' yes, 'distinguishing marks'. Find the words that tell

you the purpose of this paragraph Now well do the next three paragraphs in pairs. Thishalf of the class can do paragraph 4 and this half can do paragraphs 5 and 6. Read it through,decide on the function of each paragraph - what is the main theme of the paragraph? Does it havesubsections? Tell your partner what you think and when you have agreed, put a note down on your

white boards. I want evidence to back up what you say That's probably long enough. Let's

start on paragraph 4. Who can tell us the theme of this paragraph what is it telling us?write your suggestions up. Powerful bodies. Feet, running. They are all included. Why do you

suggest powerful bodies, Mark? Yes, it is in the opening sentence, but does the paragraph

go on to tell you about the different parts of the body? No, only the bendy back and feet

Yes, well done Yemi, both are mentioned in the context of running. [Took feedback ofparagraphs 5 and 6 in the same way.] Now we come to the conclusion. What is the purpose?

It makes a kind of ending comment. It doesn't repeat anything but it does make an interestingcomment about conservation. The conclusion makes a statement about the animal being

endangered.

Do you remember the diagram we used to help us write the recount? There is a rather differentdiagram for this one. I'll show you. [Held up report skeleton-frame on a large piece of card.] I'mgoing to transfer the notes we made about the purpose of each paragraph to this diagram. I'm goingto write the note we made for the introduction in the middle. Chloe, be ready with the next one

Thank you. What did we say for paragraph 3, James? Next, Sam Yes, we

decided on speed, didn't we? Paragraph 5, David, and you be ready afterwards, Rebecca, forparagraph 6 [ Wrote on card as children replied.] What do you think this diagram tells us

about the organisation of the paragraphs? a good idea. Let's test it. Would it alter thereport if the paragraph on appearance came in a different place? What about the others?

So it doesn't matter. After the introduction, a report has a number of paragraphs whichcould be written in any order. We call this 'non-chronological'. [ Wrote this on the board.]

You're going to work in pairs now - the same pairs as last week. You will find a report about the barnowl on your tables. I want you to work together and write down the purpose of each paragraph -just like we did on the board. You will also see that I have put some books on your tables. I'vemarked the pages containing reports. Some of you will have time to read some of these and decideif they have the same format as the report on cheetahs. A few minutes before the end ofindependent time, I will ask you to form groups to pool your information

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2 2


21

Plenary

I've put a new report skeleton-frame on the board. Let's see whether you all agree about how Ishould fill it in. Please could the five spokespeople stand up. Rajid, what did your group say aboutthe first paragraph of the barn owl report? Do the rest of you agree? Yes, you all

seem to agree there the introduction classifies the barn owl as a bird and then goes on to give areason for telling us about them they are rare. Paula's turn to go first on the next paragraph - theothers chip in if you disagree or want to add more Good, that was straightforward. Whatdo you notice about this paragraph and the second paragraph on the cheetah report? Bothhabitat but we've said that the whole point of non-chronological reports is that the paragraphscould come in any order. Any explanations? Yes, I'm sure you're right; the habitat is probablythe first thing most people want to know. [Continued to write theme of each paragraph on thereport skeleton-frame.] Now that we've done this, do you think that this report has thesame format as the cheetah report? What do both introductions do? What about theparagraphs that follow? Do the conclusions have anything in common? That's agood point. The cheetah being endangered isn't mentioned till the conclusion, whereas the barn owlbeing rare was mentioned in the introduction and then reasons were given in one of the paragraphsand proposed action in the conclusion So you think that report isn't as well planned as theone on barn owls? What do the rest of you think about the other reports I put out for youto read? So who can summarise for me what we have learned yesterday and today aboutthe organisation of report writing? Well done tomorrow, we are going to use some factsfrom our geography lessons on rivers and organise them into a report.

Day 2 Shared planning for writing

Over the last few weeks, we have been investigating various aspects of the River Thames. We'veused the Internet, watched a video and done some fieldwork up the road. You all contributed to our'wall of facts' last lesson. [Pointed to display on strips of coloured paper.] We are going to use thefacts that we've collected in geography to write a report. We can't start the writing today becausewe haven't yet analysed the kind of language we need to use. Do you remember that we had to do

that before you could write your biographies? However, you learned enough yesterday to get goingon the first stage of any writing planning. If we always plan carefully in advance, our writing ismuch more likely to have a clear organisation and so it helps the reader make sense of it. Remindme. What is the purpose of a report? So we have to organise these facts about the RiverThames into the report skeleton-frame we worked on yesterday. That way our reader will be givenclear information. What do you think we need to do first? Can we do that, though? Are yousure what you want to put in an introduction yet? Have another think I agree. We have tosort the facts into paragraphs. I've divided the board into four boxes and pinned up a couple ofpieces of card over there in case we need more paragraphs. I've taken all the facts off the wall -here you are, one each careful with the Blu-Tack. I want you to group the pieces of papertogether and stick them up on the board so that we end up with a number of facts in each box that


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are related to each other in some way. You may find yourself unsure about some. You may thinkthat certain facts can go in more than one box. We can discuss that. David, could you read yours

out and place it in any box on the board Marcia, read yours and decide whether it is thesame or a separate paragraph from David's OK, Abdul and then Paula Now these

four have identified three different paragraphs, so the rest of you will be getting a good ideawhether there is a paragraph on the board which your fact will fit in, or whether you need tocreate a new one. Let's have three more people reading theirs out: James, Sam, NazeemNow the others from this table can come out and find the most appropriate box for their facts

There seems to be some disagreement about that last fact. Marcia, could you read all thepieces of paper out in this box and see if we can find agreement What are they all about?

Yes. They are facts about what Thames Water is doing to safeguard the environment.Some of you went on the web site and took down that information. Now back to the fact that Ceriput up. Why are some of you objecting to it? I see. But isn't that to do with theenvironment? What do the rest of you think? That table wants to see it in the box below.What is that about? Yes, lots of facts about our local study of the tributary. Is Ceri's facta general point about the whole river or is it saying something about a particular part?agree. Which part? OK, let's move it over here This is going well. All thisdiscussion is really going to help your planning in future. It doesn't matter what you write - youalways have to plan it. Let's finish off the last few now

So we have five paragraphs and a couple of bits of paper which don't really fit anywhere - oneabout the tidal part of the Thames, another about Thames Water and how it manages theenvironment, a local tributary, flooding in 2000 and industries on the river. Let's write thoseheadings quickly onto the report skeleton-frame Now what about the introduction? Whatdo we do in an introduction? Yes, we define or classify, but I think we have to say morethan the fact that it is a river! Let's go back to these two facts we couldn't fit in. Could you readthe first one, please, James Right, so that tells us the length 210 miles. What does the

other one say? Those link, don't they? The source is in Gloucestershire and the mouth is?Correct. So those two facts give us an overview of the river that the report will be about

and provide a good introduction. Does it matter what order we write these paragraphs in?Correct. So what kind of report is it? Well remembered. A non-chronological report. Now,there is still something missing That's right, we haven't planned the conclusion yet. Whatis the purpose of the conclusion? That's hard, isn't it? What kind of ending comment couldyou make? That's quite a nice idea. You want to make a remark about people enjoying theriver. Yes, we could. I'll note it down under the plan and we will see how we feel about that once thereport is written.

Now it is time for you to have a go at planning on your own. You are going to quickly plan a reportabout our school. You all know lots about it! You are going to work in pairs again but this time you'lluse the large pieces of sugar paper that are on the tables. I have already drawn a report skeleton-

MOT COPY AVAILA8113124


23

frame for you but you can add more circles if you need them. What do you think you and yourpartner will put in the centre circle? Correct your introduction a word or two. What

about the circles, Ben? Yes, just simply - don't write more than a word or two to show thetheme. You can indicate some of the facts to go in each paragraph by putting spider's legs ontoeach circle like this. Again, condense your fact into a word or two. You can see why we needed a big

bit of paper, can't you! If you can think of an idea for the theme of the conclusion you can note itunder the diagram. We shall discuss them in the plenary ...

Plenary

Let's look at the work that Majid and Sam have done. I want you to tell me if they have organised

correctly for a non-chronological report? Yes, they have a note for the. introduction andseparate points in each circle. You managed to plan quite a lot of detail in the time you had. Well

done, boys. Ben, read out the notes inside the circles What do you think? Are all those

themes different or could any be combined? Why do you think the Year 6 trip needs a

separate paragraph, Abdul? Yes, I see. The boys might think about that. It's a good point.

Can these paragraphs be written in any order? Good. So it's a non-chronological report. You

succeeded. Let's read their note about the introduction. 'Say where school is in country' does

anyone know one word we could use for that not quite. I'll give you a clue, we've used it in

geography Right! Location. You can show your theme in one word. I'd like to see what

another group thought about the introduction. 'Size and number of teachers' - that is verydifferent. It does contain detail but the detail itself helps to classify the school. There isn't aright answer to what should go in the first paragraph so long as you remember what we said

yesterday it makes a general remark that introduces the subject. Now we'll see what these two

thought should be in the conclusion 'children like it - happy.' That's a nice summing up. Did anyone

have another idea? Why do you say homework? Oh I see, because you do it after

school so it should come last. What do the rest of you think? You explained that clearly,Julie. Homework is an example of one of the things about our school that you could write about in areport. Therefore, it goes in one of the paragraphs but it doesn't matter in what order. Theconclusion should be more general and make a closing comment. I rather like the idea that you wantto say that children like it and they are happy. You have done really well today. Tomorrow we aregoing to return to the cheetah text and analyse the way it is written so that you can eventuallywrite your reports.


24 25


Text

3. to recognise how poets manipulate words:

* for their quality of sound, e.g. rhythm, rhyme, assonance;

* for their connotations;

for multiple layers of meaning, e.g. through figurative language, ambiguity;

4. to investigate humorous verse:

how poets play with meanings;

* nonsense words and how meaning can be made of them;

* where the appeal lies;

5. to analyse how messages, moods, feelings and attitudes are conveyed in poetry;

6. to read and interpret poems in which meanings are implied or multi-layered; to discuss,

interpret challenging poems with others;

9. to increase familiarity with significant poets and writers of the past;

OutcomesPresentation and reading test practice paper

Teaching sequence for interpreting andresponding to poetry

First impressions; queries

Interpretation of meaning

Mood/effect on reader

Authorial technique

Underlying theme

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Day 2: shared writing

Day 1 Shared reading and analysis

1. Read through the poem, e.g. 'Jabberwocky" by Lewis Carroll with the children a couple of

times.

2.Ask the children to discuss what they like, dislike, what puzzles them (questions they would

like to ask the author), what patterns they can find. Take some feedback on a flip chart and

save until tomorrow.

3.Take a quick look at the words in the poem particularly the 'nonsense' words and how it is

possible to make sense of the poem. Notice the rhyming at the ends of lines 1 and 3, and 2

and 4 and some of the effects such as onomatopoeia, e.g. 'burbled', 'snicker-snack',

'galumphing'. Don't spend too long on this as you will be spending more time tomorrow.

4. Discuss the series of events. Help the children to see the story emerging in verse 2. Ask

them to use independent time to fix the order of events with simple cartoon sketches and

label each sketch with a caption, using language from the poem.

Plenary

Very briefly, get feedback from the children on what they think the poem is about. Start work

on a choral presentation of the poem. Consider the following:

* who reads which verse/lines, e.g. in 'Jabberwocky', who reads the narration, who reads the

father;

* dynamics (volume);

tempo (pace/speed) of the reading;

use of pauses;

expression;

positioning of speakers.

Day 2 Shared reading

Spend the first five minutes of the lesson working on the presentation. This will serve as a

reminder to the children of the poem.

o Look in more detail than you did yesterday at the different interpretations, particularly of

verse one. For example, what did different children think 'brillig' meant: a time of day, e.g.

dusk, a time of year, e.g. spring, a type of weather, e.g. snowing? What did they think 'toves'

were? How many of them thought that 'slithy' probably meant something between 'slimy'

and 'writhing'? Can a child demonstrate 'gyring' and 'gimbling'? Does 'vorpal' conjure up

the word 'viper'? etc.

Investigate how the words, rhyme and rhythm create the effects the author wants to convey

to the reader to establish the mood/atmosphere. For example, the rhyme and the rhythm

help to move the poem along; they make it easy to read and memorable, and they help to

build up the tension. The repetition in verse 2 of 'Beware' creates foreboding. Also in verse

''Jabberwocky' is available in the following anthologies: I like this poem, chosen by Kaye Webb (Puffin); The School

Bag, edited by Seamus Heaney and Ted Hughes (Faber and Faber); The Apple-Raid, chosen by Pie Corbett

(Macmillan); and Creatures, Kings and Scary Things, compiled by Elspeth Graham and Mal Peet (Oxford UniversityPress).

BEST COPY AVAIIILA


27

2, the internal rhyme of 'jaws' and 'claws' and the use of a comma between the two phrases

rather than 'and' help to make the Jabberwock into a fearful creature. Why is the first verse

repeated at the end? Consider how the language evokes a sense of period in time the use

of a sword, the words 'slain', 'foe' and 'sought' remind us of St George and the Dragon

tales of valour in the Middle Ages.

Consider the theme. Is this a typical warning story? Immediately the central character is told

not to do something, off he goes and does it. Or is it that the young man/boy is off to seek

his fortune in the world and someone (his father?) sends him on his way with words of

wisdom? What might the hero of the poem have been thinking as he stood by the Tumtum

tree? What is 'uffish thought'? Why was the father so happy? Was it to see his son home

alive, to have the Jabberwock killed? Did he deliberately goad the boy out there to try to kill

it with his warning words? Is there an underlying theme to this poem, a message the author

is trying to get across to the discerning reader? Is there something about the need to prove

ourselves? Is it a 'boy thing' or does it now apply equally to girls?

* Bring out the sheet written the previous day of the children's first impressions of the poem.

Do they feel the same? Have their queries been answered?

* Give the children some probing questions about the poem to write the answers to during

independent time, e.g.

* Write three real-word synonyms for 'frumious'.

* Why do you think the son ignored his father's warning?

Why might the author have chosen the word 'galumphing' to describe the son returning

home'?

Explain what these words mean and why you think the author used them in this poem

'slain', 'awhile', 'foe'.

Plenary

Prepare the poem for presentation the following day, perhaps in assembly.

Note: Teach Days 3 and 4 using the same approach but with a different

poem, e.g. 'My mother saw a dancing bear' by Charles Causley2.

2'My mother saw a dancing bear' by Charles Causley is available in the following anthology: The Apple-Raid

chosen by Pie Corbett (Macmillan).


28

29TBIEST COPY AVAILAITIA

.CaTi@PlkwinqjE- e Meat

PLiiM Pcciqy ki2a:1 script

Transcript of lesson for bay 1(taught by Year 6 teacher, Parminder. Children's responses and contributions omitted)

Day 1- Shared reading(extended to about 20 minutes since no sentence level objectives are being covered in this unit)

We are going to look at a poem today. I'm not going to tell you much about it before I read it, except that it is

by the Victorian writer, Lewis Carroll, who is famous for writing Alice's Adventures in Wonderland andThrough the Looking class. [Switched on data projector connected to laptop. Poem had been entered ready

into a text manipulation package, 'Textease', and so could be projected to whole-class scale. Later was able to

use this facility to manipulate the text of screen, highlight words, etc. but could have used OHP instead.]

I just want you to listen and see what you make of it. It's called 'Jabberwocky'. [Read through poem, scrollingit up the screen.] Try reading it with me. Everyone read the first verse with me and then I'll point toone table at a time to read the in-between verses with me and then we'll read the last one together. It's notas difficult to read as you might think. Try it with me. [Scrolled text back to top, and had very first go at asimple 'choral reading'.] Good. Now just turn to your partner and spend three or four minutes talkingabout that poem. How do you respond to it? What does it make you think about? What interests you? What

puzzles you? Can you see (or hear) patterns in it? How does it make you feel as a reader/listener? Be honest.

Just say what you think and feel when you hear it Thank you. Now would some of you share your

thoughts with the rest of us? [Took feedback and jotted down some of the more interesting responses on a

flip chart.] Thank you. Some really interesting early thoughts. We'll keep these notes and come back

to them tomorrow

Already a lot of you have mentioned the thing I want to talk about next the words Lewis Carroll uses. Can

you tell me some more about the words of this poem? Yes. Some are 'real' words and some are made

up What might we call the made-up words? Yes. I think they are what a lot of people wouldcall 'nonsense' words, but my next question is: Are they really nonsense? Just talk about that to your partner

for one minute Well, are they nonsense? Does this poem mean nothing at all or can you sort of work

out what Carroll means? How can you tell what the poem is saying') Yes, the 'real words' help.

How ? But do the nonsense words have any meaning? How do we work out what they mean?

Do they mean just one thing or could they mean different things? Let's just look at the first versefor a minute. [Scrolled screen display to just show verse 1.] Talk to your partner for a couple of minutesabout the different things the nonsense words in the first verse could mean? And what makes you think

that's what they mean? What ideas did you and your partner have about those words? And

what made you think it means that? All right, we have started to talk about the sound of the words

Tell me some more things about the sound of these words Yes, they fit with the rhythm ofthe poem. Can you give me an example of what you mean? [Highlighted words and sections on screen as

children talked about them.] Some of the words sound like what they are doing? Can you give me an

example of that? What about in this verse? Yes, 'snicker-snack'. Do you know what we call that sort of word?

We have talked about it before. Onomatopoeia. Can you try to explain that for me? Yes, are there

any other examples here? Yes, 'galumphing' What do you think about that one? What sort ofpicture does it put in your mind? Good, so now tell me some interesting things about the way Carroll

uses words, and why you think he does it [Made brief notes of important responses on flip chart,building up an embryo list of language features, rhythm, rhyme, onomatopoeia, alliteration, assonance, etc.]

So, can you tell what is 'happening' in the poem? Does it have a sort of 'story'? Just in some verses or

all the way through? Let's just look at verse two for a minute [scrolled to it on screen]. What do youthink is 'happening' here? Let me make a very quick sketch of what we think is going on [draws on a

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29

clean page of flip chart - very quickly stick figure, etc., only]. Yes. We've got some sort of grown-up giving

some sort of boy (really a son?) a 'right good talking to' He's warning him to keep away from these

terrible things [draws monster and monster bird in thought bubble - adult wagging finger at boy and

shouting].

Now in independent time I want you to work in pairs. You have a sheet with seven blank boxes, one for each

verse. I want you to talk to each other about what you think is happening in each verse, and then make a quick

sketch on your sheet for each one, just like I did here. Your verse two can be like mine if you want but youmight want to make it entirely different. Whatever you do, don't spend too long on each drawing. Just a very

quick sketch like mine. No more than a couple of minutes for each one. You can write on odd words as well

taken from the poem. The quality of the drawing doesn't matter at all. It's only a way of quickly noting down

what you think is happening. One of you do the sketch for the first verse, the other do the second and so on.

But both of you discuss each one first and agree what should be in each sketch. And I've got a particularlyinteresting question for you. Is the last verse sketch going to be exactly the same as the first one, or is it

going to be different? Don't tell me now. Think about it and talk about it as you are working. [Put on screen an

alternative version of text in smaller type, so that children can see all of the verses at once.]

Plenary(extended to about 20 minutes)

Before we start to work up a presentation of the poem, let's just get an idea of what you think the poem is

about. Matthew, can you tell us the story of the poem? Does anyone disagree with that? Sheena?

.... Yes, that's right. He carried it back - presumably to his father. Tomorrow, I want us to look a little moreclosely at the meaning of the poem and also at some of the effects that Lewis Carroll achieves here.

Now let's go back to trying to read the poem all together - but this time we'll need to think about what ishappening, and the different moods and images of each bit [indicated list]. So how do we want the first verse

to sound? Shall we try reading it like that? [Began to work on a choral 'performance' of the poem,

drawing on the work of the lesson, splitting verses up between different groups of voices, etc.]


30

BEST COPY AVAILABNA

31

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steR® R1Kw@ gati3@ Ar ment


Text

15. to recognise how arguments are constructed to be effective, through, e.g.

the expression, sequence and linking of points;

the provision of persuasive examples, illustrations and evidence;

pre-empting or answering potential objections;

appealing to the known views and feelings of the audience;

16. to identify the features of balanced written arguments which, e.g.

summarise different sides of an argument;

clarify the strengths and weaknesses of different positions;

signal personal opinion clearly;

18. to construct effective arguments:

developing a point logically and effectively;

'supporting and illustrating points persuasively;

anticipating possible objections;

harnessing the known views, interests and feelings of the audience;

tailoring the writing to formal presentation where appropriate;

19. to write a balanced report of a controversial issue:

summarising fairly the competing views;

analysing strengths and weaknesses of different positions;

Sentence

5. to use reading to:

investigate conditionals, e.g. using if... then, might, could, would, and their uses, e.g. in

deduction, speculation, supposition;

use these forms to construct sentences which express, e.g. possibilities, hypotheses;

explore use of conditionals in past and future, experimenting with transformations,

discussing effects, e.g. speculating about possible causes (past), reviewing a range of

options and their outcomes (future);

Word

8. to build a bank of useful terms and phrases for argument, e.g. similarly, whereas;

OutcomesWritten argument, a debate and reading and writing test practicepapers

32 The National Literacy Strategy

31

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Features of a discussion text

Purpose

To present argument and information from differing viewpoints

Generic text structure

Statement of the issue plus a preview of the main arguments

* Arguments for, plus supporting evidence

Arguments against, plus supporting evidence (alternatively, argument/counter-argument,

one point at a time)

Recommendation summary and conclusion

Sentence/word level features

Simple present tense

Generic human (or non-human) participants

Logical connectives, e.g. therefore, however

Movement is from the generic to the specific, e.g. Hunters agree ..., Mr Smith, who has

hunted for many years, ...

Emotive language may be used to engage interest or persuade the reader.

Writer's knowledge

You can turn the title into a question, e.g. Should we hunt whales?

Open by introducing the reader to the discussion you may need to add why you are

debating the issue.

Try to see the argument from both sides.

Support your views with reasons and evidence.

In your conclusion, you must give a reason for what you decide.

If you are trying to present a balanced viewpoint, check that you have been fair to both

sides.

Skeleton-frame forplanning a discussion

34


33

%t4E0@P ann ng titY5W2,`Tanu NM@ A to n

Should mobile phones be banned in schools?

In the last few years there has been an explosion in the use of new

communications technologies, including mobile phones; it is estimated that

over 70% of young people aged 10-14 now own one. Considerable debate has

taken place in the press recently as to whether pupils should be allowed to

take their mobile phones into school.

No one can deny the positive benefits of children communicating freely with

each other, and pupils argue that using a mobile phone to talk to or text-

message their friends is simply one way of doing this, using new technology.

Many parents are in favour too, and like the reassurance of knowing their

child can be safer and more independent if they have a mobile phone, since

they can contact them at any time if necessary. They cite the potential risks

faced by some children travelling alone.

However, schools point out that carrying a mobile phone could in itself make

a child more vulnerable to theft or mugging, both on the street and even in the

playground. Police figures confirm that a high proportion of crimes

committed against young people involve thefts of mobile phones. Schools are

concerned, moreover, that allowing pupils to bring their mobiles to school

could create a competitive atmosphere amongst children and result in some

children feeling left out and unvalued. In addition they claim that pupils'

education would be affected by the distraction of phones ringing in class.

Some doctors fear that children using mobiles could suffer long-term brain

damage. Until this is disproved, it would seem that schools might best protect

their pupils from this and other problems by making them leave their mobile

phones at home.


34

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fety

).3r

d se

nten

ce e

labo

rate

s on

this

with

evid

ence

.

Par

agra

ph 3

For

a b

an. 1

st s

ente

nce

cont

ests

the

safe

tyar

gum

ent i

n P

arag

raph

2. 2

nd s

ente

nce

adds

conf

irmin

g ev

iden

ce. 3

rd a

nd 4

th s

ente

nces

intr

oduc

e tw

o ne

w r

easo

ns fo

r a

ban.

Con

clus

ion

Fin

al p

arag

raph

1st s

ente

nce

offe

rs c

ompe

lling

rea

son

for

aba

n, b

ased

on

the

issu

e of

saf

ety.

2nd

sent

ence

add

s to

this

clin

chin

g ar

gum

ent a

sum

mar

y of

Par

agra

ph 3

.

'Pas

sive

con

stru

ctio

n

Shou

ld m

obile

pho

nes(

be'b

anne

d)in

sch

ools

?'F

AA

tt4t

3f. t

o gi

ve Y

eALO

AK

t iat

0zat

ion.

In th

e la

st fe

w y

ears

ther

e(ha

s be

e)an

inth

e us

e of

new

Sen

tenc

e / w

ord

leve

l

Em

otiv

e la

ngua

ge to

emkp

kasi

se p

oint

ssiu

e. c

ofis

truc

tion

com

mun

icat

ions

tech

nolo

gies

, inc

ludi

ng m

obile

pho

nes;

qt is

est

imat

ecpt

hat

over

(70%

of y

oung

peo

ple

aged

10-

14 n

ow o

wn

one.

(Con

side

rabl

e de

bate

as

take

n pl

ace

in th

e pr

ess

rece

ntly

as

to w

Che

r pu

pils

sho

uld

be a

llow

ed to

take

thei

r m

obile

pho

nes

into

sch

ool.

Sta

tistic

s to

rel

ator

ce.

)._A

Kou

n6e

of d

ebat

e: s

tron

g as

sert

ion

(No

one

can

deny

)the

pos

itive

ben

efits

of c

hild

ren(

com

mun

icat

ing

free

lwith

each

oth

er, a

nd(p

upils

arg

ue th

at u

sing

a m

obile

pho

ne to

talk

to o

r te

xt-

mes

sage

thei

r fr

iend

imp

one

way

of d

oing

this

, usi

ng n

ew te

chno

logy

.

Man

y pa

rent

s

child

can

be

safe

r a

they

can

con

tact

them

a

like

the

reas

sura

nce

of k

now

ing

thei

r

depe

nde

if th

ey h

ave

a m

obile

pho

ne,(

sinc

e)

e if

nece

ss. ,

.MIE

Dth

e po

tent

ial r

isks

face

d by

som

e ch

ildre

n tr

avel

linlo

ne.

),.A

Ko1

oe.

of d

ebat

e

Com

utiv

e im

pl84

1.6

coitt

radi

ctio

m.

(How

eve

scho

ols

poin

t out

that

car

ryin

g a

mob

ile p

hon

'Pre

sent

teitS

e. 6

CA

LVA

U8

used

in it

self

mak

e

a ch

ild m

ore(

vuln

erab

le to

)the

ft or

mug

ging

, bot

h on

the

stre

et a

nd e

ven

in th

e

play

grou

nd. P

olic

e fig

ures

con

firm

that

a h

igh

prop

ortio

n of

crim

es

com

mitt

ed a

gain

st y

oung

peo

ple

invo

lve

thef

ts o

f mob

ile p

hone

s. S

choo

ls a

re

conc

emed

,(m

oreo

vet)

that

allo

win

g pu

pils

to b

ring

thei

r m

obile

s to

sch

ool

(cou

ld)c

reat

e a

com

petit

ive

atm

osph

ere

amon

gst c

hild

ren

and

resu

lt in

so

ch d

ren

feel

ing

left

out a

nd u

nval

ued

In a

dditi

oey

cla

im th

at p

upils

'

edu.

.tion

Car

0=b

the

dist

ract

ion

of p

hone

s rin

ging

in c

lass

.

Con

ditio

nal f

orm

sug

gest

s It8

poth

esis

'Pas

siue

.

Som

e do

ctor

s fe

ar th

at c

hild

ren

usin

g m

obile

cou

ld s

uffe

r lo

ng-t

erm

b

dam

age.

(Unt

il th

is is

dis

prov

ed)

it w

ould

see

m th

at s

choo

lsbe

st p

rote

ct

thei

r pu

pils

from

this

and

oth

er p

robl

ems

by m

akin

g th

em le

ave

thei

r m

obile

phon

es a

t hom

e.

Com

plex

sen

tenc

e us

ing

conn

ectiv

e

Con

ditio

nal f

orm

sug

gest

s itp

otkc

sis

170r

MA

I lan

guag

e

Con

nect

ive

Coi

titec

tiue

phra

se. s

kopa

iiti

A tO

6iC

At r

eAtiO

NS

Itip

baN

ten

the

two

sent

ence

s

ST C

OPY

AV

AIL

AB

LE

Con

nect

ive.

impl

8in6

an A

LCV

IA1.

41A

tiOlt

Ot

argu

men

ts

Con

ditio

nal f

orin

als

odi

stan

ces

Akk

OY

from

tke

argu

men

t and

so

sugg

ests

Aba

lanc

ed p

rese

ntat

ion

SDO

Hno

sDH

Has the time come to ban cars fromthe centre of towns and cities?

Global warming caused by pollution has begun to affect us directly, with climate

change starting to affect British weather. Some people believe the time has come

for drastic action to reduce pollution caused by heavy traffic.

There is no doubt that traffic fumes are a major cause of pollution throughout the

developed world, and are a particular problem in large towns and cities. In a small

country like the UK, cities are close enough together to cause high levels of traffic

fume pollution in the air over large areas of the land. Consequently, health

problems are created such as asthma, which has rapidly increased as the number of

cars on the road has risen. An additional problem in urban areas is congestion,

which wastes time and adds to costs. The average speed of traffic in central London

is now only 12 miles per hour, the same as it was in Victorian times. A ban on cars

in the centre of large towns and cities would therefore seem sensible as it would cut

pollution thereby improving health. It would also reduce congestion, allowing

buses, emergency vehicles and delivery trucks to be more efficient.

On the other hand, it could be argued that such a ban would create other problems.

Public transport in this country is expensive and sometimes unreliable. Would there

be enough trains and buses to cope with the numbers needing them? Furthermore,

there is also the issue of personal freedom. Is it right to prevent people from

choosing the mode of transport they prefer? Many people feel safer in their cars

when travelling at night than they do on a bus or a train.

While there is clearly an urgent need to cut pollution, this could be achieved by

developing cleaner fuels and electrically powered cars, and encouraging people to

use public transport where possible, rather than forcing them to do so.


36 37

Titl

e

Tex

t lev

el

A q

uest

ion

sum

mar

isin

g th

e is

sue

bein

gdi

scus

sed.

Key

wor

ds: b

an, c

ars,

tow

ns,

citie

s.

Intr

oduc

tion

Firs

t par

agra

phS

tate

s sc

ient

ific

fact

s th

at h

ave

give

n ris

e to

the

ques

tion

in th

e tit

le.

Arg

umen

tP

arag

raph

2F

or a

ban

. 1st

sen

tenc

e gi

ves

fact

s w

hich

unde

rpin

all

argu

men

ts in

favo

ur o

f a b

an.

2nd

sent

ence

mak

es th

e ge

nera

l arg

umen

tm

ore

spec

ific

(wor

se in

UK

). 3

rd s

ente

nce

intr

oduc

es a

new

arg

umen

t (he

alth

). 4

th a

nd5t

h se

nten

ces

add

anot

her

argu

men

t with

supp

ortin

g ev

iden

ce. 6

th a

nd 7

th s

ente

nces

sum

mar

ise

why

a b

an w

ould

be

effe

ctiv

e.

Par

agra

ph 3

Aga

inst

a b

an. 1

st s

ente

nce

cont

ests

all

argu

men

ts in

Par

agra

ph 2

with

aco

ntra

dict

ory

asse

rtio

n. 2

nd s

ente

nce

mak

esa

clai

m th

at is

spe

cific

to th

e U

K. 3

rdse

nten

ce e

labo

rate

s on

this

. 4th

sen

tenc

ein

trod

uces

a n

ew a

rgum

ent.

5th

sent

ence

elab

orat

es o

n th

is b

y ci

ting

an e

xam

ple.

Con

clus

ion

Fin

al p

arag

raph

Sen

tenc

e ac

know

ledg

es th

e fa

cts

stat

ed in

the

open

ing

sent

ence

of t

he in

trod

uctio

n, a

ndsu

gges

ts a

ltern

ativ

e so

lutio

ns to

the

prob

lem

.

Has

the

time

com

e to

ban

car

s fr

omth

e ce

ntre

of

tow

ns a

nd c

ities

?lit

iret p

erso

nj_

Art

rirtA

6e. o

f deb

ate

Glo

bal w

arm

ing

caus

ed b

y po

llutio

nas

beg

un)t

o af

fect

dire

ctly

, with

clim

ate

chan

ge s

tart

ing

to a

ffect

Brit

ish

wea

ther

the

time

has

com

e

for

dras

tic a

ctio

n to

red

uce

pollu

tion

caus

ed b

y he

avy

traf

fic.

.1.-

Art

6trA

yof

Alm

a: s

trol

l/3 A

SS

LYtiO

aT

Ulti

tiCA

t

NO

lere

is n

o do

ubt)

that

traf

fic fu

mes

are

a(m

ajor

cau

se o

f pol

luti4

thro

ugho

ut th

e

deve

lope

d w

orld

, and

are

a p

artic

ular

pro

blem

in la

rge

tow

ns a

nd c

ities

. In

a sm

all

coun

try

like

the

UK

, citi

es a

re c

lose

eno

ugh

toge

ther

to c

ause

hig

h le

vels

of t

raffi

c

fum

e po

llutio

n in

the

air

over

larg

e ar

eas

of th

e la

nd.

prob

lem

s ar

e cr

eate

d su

ch a

s as

thm

a, w

hich

has

rap

idly

incr

ease

d as

the

num

ber

o

cars

on

the

road

has

ris

en. A

n ad

ditio

nal p

robl

em in

urb

an a

reas

is c

onge

stio

n,

whi

ch w

aste

s tim

e an

d ad

ds to

cos

ts. T

he a

vera

ge s

peed

of t

raffi

c in

cen

tral

Lon

don

is n

ow o

nl It

EaM

iln)t

he s

ame

as it

was

in V

icto

rian

times

. A b

an o

n ca

rs

heal

th

Sen

tenc

e / w

ord

leve

l

'Pre

sent

tutu

. 6el

tey-

All8

use

d

StA

tistia

in th

e ce

ntre

of l

arge

tow

ns a

nd c

ities

to y

eillt

orct

pol

lutio

n th

ereb

y im

prov

ing

heal

th. I

tal

so r

seem

sen

sibl

e as

it

estio

n, a

ll

buse

s, e

mer

genc

y ve

hicl

es a

nd d

eliv

ery

truc

ks to

be

mor

e ef

ficie

nt

Cot

trac

tiut p

kras

e/F

orm

al la

n61.

4aot

of d

ebat

e

----

(On

the

othe

r ha

nd)(

t cou

ld b

e ar

gued

tha)

such

a b

an C

)cre

ate

othe

r pr

oble

ms.

win

gC

ondi

tiona

l for

m s

u66e

sts

itspo

tkes

is

Cut

Con

nect

ive

art

eats

MU

SA

( (1

14.k

.

Con

nect

ive

Pub

lic tr

ansp

ort i

n th

is c

ount

ry is

exp

ensi

ve a

nd s

omet

imes

unr

elia

ble.

Wou

ld th

ere

be e

noug

h tr

ains

and

bus

es to

cop

e w

ith th

e nu

mbe

rs n

eedi

ng th

em?(

Fur

ther

mor

ther

e is

als

o th

e is

sue

of p

erso

nal f

reed

om. I

s it

right

to p

reve

nt p

eopl

e fr

om

choo

sing

the

mod

e of

tran

spor

t the

y pr

efer

? M

any

peop

le fe

el s

afer

in th

eir

cars

whe

n tr

avel

ling

at n

ight

than

they

do

on a

bus

or

a tr

ain.

Con

nect

iut

(Whi

le)t

here

is c

lear

ly a

n ur

gent

nee

d to

cut

pol

lutio

n, th

is(c

ould

be

achl

eved

)by

deve

lopi

ng c

lean

er fu

els

and

elec

tric

ally

pow

ered

car

s, a

n en

cour

agin

g \p

eopl

e to

use

publ

ic tr

ansp

ort w

here

pos

sibl

e, r

athe

r th

an fo

rcin

g t e

m to

do

so.

TA

ssiu

t uoi

ce.

Con

nect

ive

Con

ditio

nal f

orm

art

eats

k8p

otke

sis

BE

ST C

OPY

AV

AIL

AB

LE

`Use

of a

uest

ions

topr

ovok

e de

bate

Com

plex

- se

nten

ce

SD

aino

saH

Should dogs be banned from parks?

There are thousands of pet dogs in Britain today, and clearing up after

them costs local councils money. This fact, and some well-publicised

attacks by dogs on children, have led to calls for dogs to be banned from

parks.

Everyone at some time or other has experienced the unpleasantness of

finding dog mess on their shoes. Yet it could be argued dog mess is not

simply annoying: direct contact with it can also lead to an eye disease

(toxocariasis) resulting in blindness.

However, dog lovers point out that this mess is biodegradable, whereas

the mess and rubbish left behind by humans in parks and on the streets

is not. Cans, plastic bottles and polystyrene packaging cost enormous

sums of money to dispose of, and will pollute the planet for thousands

of years. Toxocariasis is an extremely rare disease which can be avoided

by following basic hygiene rules. Most dog owners clear up after their

pets if bins are provided.

Critics of dogs often claim that they are unpredictable and dangerous,

and therefore should not be allowed in parks because of the risks to

children.

On the contrary, most dogs are friendly and sociable, particularly those

whose owners take them out regularly. Attacks by dogs usually only

arise when a dog is defending its territory. For example, in one serious

incident it emerged that the injured boy had climbed into the pub yard

which the dog was guarding.

Although dogs can sometimes be a nuisance and, very rarely, dangerous,

they do less damage to our environment than lazy people who drop

litter. Walking a dog is a cheap and easy way for many people to stay fit.

Moreover, Parks Police admit that dog walkers, by being out at all hours

and by often not sticking to the main paths, perform a valuable service

in deterring would-be criminals from using our parks.


3839

Tex

t lev

el

Titl

eA

que

stio

n su

mm

aris

ing

the

issu

e be

ing

disc

usse

d. K

ey w

ords

: dog

s, b

anne

d, p

arks

.

Intr

oduc

tion

Firs

t par

agra

phE

ach

sent

ence

giv

es a

rat

iona

le in

favo

ur o

f aba

n.

Arg

umen

tP

arag

raph

2F

or a

ban

. 1st

sen

tenc

e ap

peal

s to

com

mon

expe

rienc

e to

arg

ue d

ogs

are

mes

sy. 2

ndse

nten

ce e

labo

rate

s, w

ith s

cien

tific

evi

denc

eth

at d

ogs

are

a th

reat

to h

ealth

.

Par

agra

ph 3

Aga

inst

a b

an. 1

st s

ente

nce

cont

radi

cts

the

1st a

rgum

ent (

dogs

are

mes

sy),

with

aco

unte

r-cl

aim

(pe

ople

are

mes

sier

). 2

ndse

nten

ce e

labo

rate

s w

ith s

uppo

rtin

g

iigS

evid

ence

. 3rd

sen

tenc

e co

ntra

dict

s th

e 2n

d

CD

argu

men

t (th

reat

to h

ealth

). 4

th s

ente

nce

offe

rs a

sol

utio

n to

bot

h ar

gum

ents

1 a

nd 2

.

Par

agra

ph 4

For

a b

an. S

ente

nce

intr

oduc

es a

new

argu

men

t (do

gs a

re d

ange

rous

).

Par

agra

ph 5

Aga

inst

a b

an. 1

st s

ente

nce

cont

radi

cts

the

assu

mpt

ion

in P

arag

raph

4. 2

nd s

ente

nce

offe

rs e

vide

nce

base

d on

sci

entif

ic th

eory

. 3rd

sent

ence

ela

bora

tes

with

a s

peci

fic e

xam

ple.

Con

clus

ion

Fin

al p

arag

raph

1st s

ente

nce

sum

mar

ises

the

argu

men

ts in

Par

agra

ph 3

. 2nd

sen

tenc

e ad

ds a

n ad

ditio

nal

reas

on a

gain

st a

ban

, als

o re

late

d to

hea

lth.

3rd

sent

ence

giv

es a

s a

clin

chin

g ar

gum

ent

the

clai

m th

at, f

ar fr

om m

akin

g pa

rks

dang

erou

s fo

r ch

ildre

n, d

ogs

can

actu

ally

mak

e th

em s

afer

.

Shou

ld d

ogs

be b

anne

d fr

om p

arks

?'P

rese

nt tu

tu 6

eter

all8

use

d

The

re a

rett.

----

;Zds

of p

et d

ogs

in B

ritai

n to

day,

and

cle

arin

g up

afte

rth

em@

os*o

cal c

ounc

ils m

oney

. Thi

s fa

ct, a

nd s

ome&

ell-p

ublic

ised

atta

cks

by d

ogs

on c

hild

ren,

hav

e le

d to

cal

ls fo

r do

gs to

be

bann

ed fr

ompa

rks.

Con

ditio

nal d

ista

nces

Nrit

es. {

row

ior6

okut

t

Eve

ryon

e at

som

e tim

e or

oth

er h

as e

xper

ienc

ed th

e un

plea

sant

ness

of

findi

ng d

og m

ess

on th

eir

shoe

s. Y

et it

(cou

lOe

argu

ed d

og m

ess

is n

otsi

mpl

y an

noyi

ng: d

irect

con

tact

with

it c

an a

lso

lead

to a

n ey

e di

seas

e(t

oxoc

aria

sis)

(res

ultin

g in

blin

dnes

s)--

-,Im

pers

onal

lang

uage

,C

Oai

tatiV

e 11

.106

itt6

cont

radi

ctio

n

(How

ever

) do

g lo

vers

poi

nt o

ut th

at th

is m

ess

is b

iode

grad

able

whe

reas

the

mes

s an

d ru

bbis

h le

ft be

hind

by

hum

ans

in p

arks

and

on

the

stre

ets

is n

ot. C

ans,

pta

stic

bot

tles

and

poly

styr

ene

pack

agin

g co

st e

norm

ous

sum

s of

mon

ey to

dis

pose

of,

and

will

pol

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Do circuses still need animal acts?

For over a century, touring circuses have provided family entertainment with a

mixture of human and animal acts. As more information about animal behaviour

becomes available, the question arises of whether it is any longer acceptable for

animals to be kept for performing.

Supporters argue that circuses are part of our tradition, and that many families visit

a circus who might not go to other sorts of live entertainment. But traditions can

and do change with time, and a circus without animal acts still provides plenty of

variety, with clowns, trapeze and high wire acts, jugglers and acrobats.

It is claimed that circuses are educational, as they give many people the chance to

see wild animals such as lions and elephants at close quarters. However, it could

be argued that zoos and safari parks offer this opportunity more successfully, since

they contain a far wider range of creatures living in a more natural habitat. They

also usually provide additional information in the form of leaflets, signs and

captions, and have staff available to answer questions.

Those in favour of animals in circuses say that the animals enjoy performing and

are trained using rewards and tit-bits, so no cruelty is involved. Nevertheless,

opponents point out that animals do not perform in their natural environments, and

therefore it is not right to coerce them into doing this merely for the entertainment

of humans. They also criticise the cramped living conditions in which circus

animals are forced to spend most of their time.

Through watching informative programmes on television, more people have a

growing understanding of the needs of wild animals, such as plenty of space to

roam and the freedom to live with their own kind. In the 21st century, it seems

unnecessary and even cruel to confine wild animals and train them to do tricks

for the public's amusement.


4041

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21


Day 4: shared writing (applying the learning from Day 3)

ContextOn Day 1 the teacher and children did some activities from Unit 51 in Grammar for Writing on

conditionals. Then they read Sample Text A, and briefly discussed the issues presented

before going on to analyse and annotate for organisational features in order to create the

skeleton-frame of the discussion text type. They repeated the process independently using

Sample Text B and other classroom texts. On Day 2, they used the skeleton-frame and facts

and arguments they had been discussing in history to plan a discussion text on the Second

World War.

Day 3 Shared reading and analysis1. Tell the children that in order to write a really effective discussion, they need to be clear

about both the organisation of this text type, which they worked on earlier in the week, and

its language features. This might include the tense and person the text is written in, the

kinds of sentences used, the punctuation and particular sorts of vocabulary chosen to

match the text-type and to engage and stimulate the reader.

2. Explain that the purpose of today's session will be to analyse Text A, investigating its

language features and creating a checklist of the features they can use for their own

writing.

3. Re-read Text A (enlarged/OHT) briskly to orientate the children.

4. Referring to the title, model for the children how to annotate a text by underlining 'be

banned' and annotating it as the passive voice. Remind them of the reasons for using the

passive.

5. Analyse and annotate the first paragraph with the children. Begin to create the checklist of

features as you go, on a flip chart.

6. For paragraph 2, ask the children to work in pairs for a few minutes, noting features which

seem distinctive to this text type on their white boards. Then ask them to join with another

pair, compare their lists, discuss them and agree on a final list of three or four features

between them. Take feedback from the groups, annotate Text A and continue to add to the

class checklist.

7. Repeat with paragraphs 3 and 4, noting the features of a conclusion.

8. Tell the children to use the checklist they have just created for Text A as a reference point

and prompt to annotate Text B in pairs and write two checklists: one of any language

features in B which were also in A, and one of any new features in B only. Make it clear that

in the plenary, you will be adding what they've discovered to the class checklist.

Plenary

Take feedback from each group, asking first for one or two examples of language features in

Text B which were also found in Text A. Annotate Text B as you go. Were there any features

which occurred in the same paragraph in each text? Why might that be? Were there any

additional features in B, that were not in A (e.g. questions to provoke debate)? If so, could they

think of a way that feature could have been used in Text A? Take suggestions and encourage

children to comment on the effectiveness of this. Conclude by telling children that tomorrow

they will be thinking of how they can use the checklist of language features in their own writing

of a discussion.


42

43BEST COPY AVAILAIBITAR

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Day 4 Application in shared writing1. Tell the children that the objective of today's session is to write a discussion text, based on

the plan they made on Tuesday, on the Second World War. Re-read Texts A and B briskly to

remind them of the text type they will be producing. Refer to the checklist made yesterday

and tell them you will be using this as a prompt.

2. Display the notes made in the discussion skeleton-frame on Tuesday. Give the children

some time in small groups to discuss the issue and ask if anyone has thought of any

additional arguments or has located any useful facts or figures to support the argument

which are not on the plan. Add these on.

3. Begin with the title. Remind the children of what they noticed about the titles when

analysing Texts A and B (e.g. use of key words and question format). Ask them in pairs to

think of a suitable title for this piece. Take ideas, rephrase if necessary and scribe.

4. Move on to the introductory paragraph. Recap on the features identified in Texts A and B,

pointing out that these introductions are usually only one or two sentences long. Write part

of the sentence yourself, then ask the children to complete in pairs on their white boards.

Take some of their ideas and scribe. Demonstrate using the checklists (for content and for

language features) as reference points.

5. Explain that paragraph 2, as in Texts A and B, will contain all the arguments and evidence

supporting one point of view on the issue. Ask the children to discuss, in pairs, which point

of view should come first and why. Take suggestions and encourage children to respond to

each other's opinions. Agree the broad content of the paragraph, and then tell the children

in which order the points in the skeleton should go, i.e. which is the best point to start with.

Give reasons for your choices.

6. Follow the same pattern for the points in paragraphs 2 and 3, remembering to re-read and

emphasising the need for the ideas to flow logically.

7. Re-read what you have composed so far. Ask the children to consider whether it could be

improved by using any of the features on the checklist. Re-draft as necessary.

8. Explain to the children that in pairs, during independent time, they are going to write

paragraph 3 which will include all the opposing arguments, and the concluding paragraph.

Remind them to refer to both checklists, and to discuss each sentence aloud with their

partner.

9. Tell them that in the plenary you will be taking a couple of points from the skeleton and

asking them how they expressed one of these points effectively in their writing.

Plenary

Select one of the points from the skeleton, which the children have been including in

paragraph 3, and ask for volunteers to read aloud the sentence or sentences which relate to

that point. Ask the other children to listen carefully and identify which features have been used

and to suggest why they think the writers chose to use it. Encourage them to comment on their

own and each other's sentences, particularly in relation to the effectiveness of using particular

features (e.g. the use of certain connectives implying contradiction or reinforcement) and

vocabulary choices.


43

Transcripts of lessons for bays 3 and 4(taught by Year 6 teacher, Bobbie. Children's responses and contributions omitted)

bay 3 Shared reading and analysisNote: the texts for the shared and independent reading are on pages 34 41.

You remember that I told you on Monday when we started this work on discussion texts that the aim is foryou to be able to write your own argument or discussion really effectively? Well, in order to do that, you haveto be clear not just about how that type of text is organised, but also you have to know about the language

features of discussion texts. What I mean by that is, the kinds of words you use, the way you construct your

sentences. Can anyone suggest what else we mean by language features? Yes, right, punctuation. Wemight use particular forms of punctuation, like you often use bullet points when you write instructionsYes, definitely, the tense it's written in, good. So, our objective today is to look carefully at the discussiontext we read and discussed on Monday, 'Should mobile phones be banned in schools?', investigate its language

features together, and make a list of them on the flip chart. Then, when you come to write your owndiscussion later, you'll all be able to use the checklist to remind yourselves That's right, we did thesame thing when we were writing playscripts, well remembered. And it did help, didn't it? [Switched on OHP -

enlarged version of 'Should mobile phones be banned?' and read through it]

I know we all have lots to say about this issue and different points of.view came up in our discussion. Now we

are going to look more closely at how the argument has been constructed. If we look first at the title, I'mgoing to show you a language feature in that title, and it's not a very common one, [underlined 'be banned'] can

anyone tell me what it is? Nearly right, it's called the passive voice [annotated 'passive voice' on OHT]

and who can remember why it might be used? Yes, when you want your writing to sound more formal.

Can you remember any other formal writing we did? Yes, when we wrote those letters of complaint tothe council and the certificates too, that's right. Now if you look at this title you'll see it doesn't tellus who would be doing the banning, and that's what happens if you use the passive voice, it lets you 'hide' who's

doing it, maybe because it doesn't matter or because you don't want to draw attention to them. So I'm going

to start off our checklist of key language features with 'passive voice' [wrote this on flip chart headed 'KeyLanguage Features of Discussion Texts'].

Now let's look at the first paragraph, the introduction, all together Good, you've spotted another use

of the passive voice [underlined and annotated 'it is estimated' ] the words the writer chooses. Yes,'explosion' has greater impact on the reader than a phrase such as 'sharp increase' Why? And tell uswhy you picked 'Considerable debate' Yes it does sound very formal again, doesn't it? It definitelylets us know there's a debate happening, there are two different viewpoints on this issue [underlined and

annotated 'considerable debate' and added 'formal language of debate' to checklist]. Is there any evidence,any hard facts here? Well done, those statistics there [underlined and annotated '70% of youngpeople'] make it sound more convincing, you're right [wrote 'evidence, e.g. statistics, to support a point of

view' on checklist]. Now I want us to move on to paragraph 2. What do we know from our work on Monday is

the content of paragraph 2? Thank you, all the arguments against a ban, so there should be plenty ofthese features here we can spot. I'd like you to work with your partner, find and note down at least threelanguage features in this paragraph Yes, they might be ones we've found already or they might be

new ones. You'll have three minutes for that, then I'm going to ask you as a pair to turn to another pair and

compare your lists. I want you to discuss what you found and agree on one list between the four of you, OK?

Five minutes for all of that, please Well done, you've found that it's written in the present tense,[underlined can anyone else see some other present tense verbs, please? Yes, 'argue' 'can'


44

4 5 16335T COPY AVAILABLE

'are' In fact all the verbs are in the present tense so I can underline and annotate them all,

and also add 'present tense' to our checklist. What about other features? Yes, excellent, you four

have noticed some of the particular language that people tend to use in discussion writing [underlined and

annotated 'pupils argue' and 'They cite'] these sorts of phrases are typical of a discussion text where both

sides of the argument are being put quite strongly. Again, it's quite formal language. Can you see any more

examples of this sort of formal, debating style of language? Very good, yes, 'No one can deny'. Can

you explain to us, one of you four, why you picked out that phrase? I do see what you mean, yes, what

about the rest of you? OK so I'm going to write that on our checklist as 'strong claim' or 'strongassertion'. Is there anything we've missed in either paragraph? Just check through them again Good,

there's a connective there, 'since', in that complex sentence which links together the two parts of the

sentence.

If we start to look at paragraph 3, where we know all the opposing arguments are, we can see that it startswith another connective [underlined and annotated 'however']. Even if we didn't already know that the other

side of the argument was going to be in this paragraph, that particular connective would tell us, wouldn't it?

Can anyone explain that? Good, yes, it's like a signal to the reader that someone is about to argue the

opposite, to contest the viewpoint in paragraph 2. I'd like you now to read through paragraph 3 with your

partner and list some of the language features on your white boards You've said 'moreover'

[underlined and annotated 'moreover'] so can another pair explain what kind of connective that is? Is it like

'however'? What does anyone else think about what she just said? So what do I need to write

on our checklist? You're both right, so I'm going to write this [wrote 'connective suggesting further

evidence (moreover)' on flip chart] These verbs, 'could' and 'would' what form is that and when is it

used? Good, they're conditional verbs [underlined and annotated] and they suggest a possibility,

don't they, rather than a certainty. What's the effect of using them here? Let's replace them with 'does' and'will' [wrote on OHT] what's the difference when we read it? Talk about that for a minute in your pairs,

please That's it, if you use the conditional form, 'could' and 'would' and 'might' and so on, it makes you

sound more reasonable, as if you're making your arguments in a very measured way, not just flinging out a lot

of wild claims that you can't prove. I'm going to write 'conditional form to suggest possibility/hypothesis'[wrote on checklist] because we've come across that word in our science work.

Let's do the concluding paragraph together quickly Yes, we've got those on our checklist [underlined

and annotated 'could', 'might' and 'until this is disproved']. That last one is a connective phrase isn't it, rather

than a single connective word, that links the ideas in the two sentences together. [Wrote 'connective phrase

linking ideas' on checklist.]

Listen carefully while I explain what I want you to do while I'm reading with a group. On your tables is a copy

of the text you analysed on Monday, 'Has the time come to ban cars from the centre of towns and cities?' Inpairs, read through the whole text again first. Then start to annotate it, like I did, beginning with the title,underlining the language features you notice and writing what they are in the margin. Use our checklist we've

made today to help you find as many features as you can. If you find a feature in this text that is on our

checklist, write it in one list. If you find a language feature that isn't already on our checklist, write it in aseparate list, so you could end up with two lists. In our plenary, I want to add all the features you've found toour class checklist, and also I'll be asking some of you about the effects of some of these features.

BEST COPY MILA 46The National Literacy Strategy

45

Plenary

Right, can your group start us off by telling us one or two features you discovered, that were also in this

text? [ticked off items on class checklist, underlined and annotated copy of Text B on OHT]

Thank you, next group, please [repeated for each group]. Has anyone noticed if there were

any features which occurred in roughly the same place in each text? Yes, like both titles being

questions, but looking at the language features So both paragraph 2s begin with a strong assertion,

and there are several connectives in there, too. Why is that, do you think? You think it's an effectiveway to start off a paragraph of arguments, then? I agree, it takes the reader straight to the point of view

very forcefully, doesn't it?

My last question to you is, were there any features in your text that weren't in this one we did together?Could that feature, asking the reader questions to make them think about the point being made, be

used in this text? [pointed to Text A]. Have a quick go at changing this final sentence [pointed to Text A] in

paragraph 3 into a question Well done, 'Would children's education be affected by the distraction ofphones ringing in class?' You might like to think about the effect of making this change. This checklist isgoing to be really helpful to us tomorrow when we start to write our own discussion text and you need to

include the key language features.

bay 4 = Shared writing apply

Our objective today is to write our own argument or discussion text, using all the things we've found outabout how this kind of text is written. We're going to use the plan we made on Tuesday as a basis, and we've

also got these two checklists we can refer to [pointed to lists and plan displayed] that will act as reminders.

Now for our discussion text, we're using information from our history topic last term, when we learnt a lotabout what life was like during the Second World War. As I said to you on Tuesday, we're using that because

it's something you know a lot about, especially the effect of the war on children, and many of you said that

the drama we did about evacuation really made you understand what that experience might have been like

for the children and their families. So here's our skeleton-frame, with all the points in favour of evacuationdown one side, and the points against down the other, and some additional detail for some of those points,

such as evidence to back up a claim being made. Has anyone thought of any more points since Tuesday that we

could include, either for or against? You've come up with an important fact that we forgot, thatsadly, some children became orphans while they were evacuated because their dad was killed in the fighting

and their mum died in the bombing that is a really important piece of information. Well done. Now can youthink of an argument to make, based on that fact? Talk to your partners for a moment and see what you can

think of OK, you've put that very well. From your discussion you would like to argue that because

some children were orphaned, evacuation was a bad thing and it would have been better if they could have

stayed with their mums even if that meant running the risk of dying in an air raid. Can someone put the

opposing argument? Good, yes, you've come up with a good reason, that they might have survived the

bombing so it was better that they were living safely with someone they knew, if they were going to beorphaned anyway. I think if you want to include this point in your writing, you could argue it as a 'for' or an

'against', so I'm going to leave that to you to decide, and maybe later in the week we'll see who came up with

the most convincing argument.


46 4 7 e'rv,arvi AVAILABLIE

Now we said our writing would be a discussion that might have appeared in a newspaper or magazine during

the war, once evacuation had started and some people had started to question whether it was such a good

idea. Let's start with thinking of a title remember what we found out about the title: that it's often in theform of a question, and includes the key words. Turn to your partner and decide on a suitable titleI'm going to change what you said just a little bit to make it a bit shorter 'Will evacuation be good for ourchildren?"Evacuation' is one of the 'shun' words we've looked at isn't it? Stephen can you think about the

word ending please and spell 'evacuation' for me as I write [Wrote 'Will evacuation be good for our

children ?'] How did you know it ended with '-tion' and not '-sion' or '-cian' Stephen? Well remembered,

it comes from the verb 'evacuate' and it keeps the 't' when you change it to 'evacuation' Yes, quite

right, Hasna, we found out that '-tion' is the most common 'shun' ending, didn't we?

Next, we need to write our introductory paragraph, so let's recap on what we know about that. It's quitebrief, usually only one or two sentences long, and it needs to clarify the situation, saying a bit more about

those key words in the title. I'm going to begin by writing the first sentence. [Wrote 'Since the start of thewar, more than 250,000 children have been evacuated'.] I'd like you, in your pairs, to write the next sentence

on your white boards which will finish off the introduction I like the way you've managed to suggest

the long-term effects of evacuation in your sentence, and it also uses one of the language features from thechecklist. See if you can spot it as I'm writing. [Wrote 'Yet as the war continues into another year many of

those have been removed from their new homes'.] Good, there's the passive voice there [pointed to

'have been removed'] setting a formal tone to the whole piece right at the start.

Let's move on to paragraph 2. As we know from the discussion texts we've read, this is often where we'll need

to write all the arguments in support of one point of view. Here on our plan are the two different viewpoints:which shall we start with? Discuss it with your partner, and I want you to give me reasons why we should

start with the point of view you choose Good, you've given me two reasons why we should start with

the arguments against evacuation. Has anyone got two or more reasons why we should start with the points in

favour? Anybody like to comment on either of those proposals? Right, I think that's a goodpoint, to start with the points 'for' because that's what everyone thought to begin with, that it was a goodidea to send the children to a safe place, and it was only as time went on that some of the points against

evacuation began to be realised. So we could reflect that in the way we write this, beginning with this pointon our plan, then moving to a sentence about this one because it follows logically, and finishing with a

sentence about food shortages. Now what we need is an effective opening phrase for this sentence which is

going to explain the idea of moving children away from the bombing. Talk to your partner and try to think of a

strong phrase that we can use Yes, we could start off with that, but I think this pair's was betterbecause it appeals to a common belief at the start of the war, that the bombing would kill everyone in thecities. [Wrote 'In 1939 everyone believed that'.] And I'm going to finish the sentence using the passive voiceto get that feeling of formality [pointed to checklist, then wrote 'our cities would be destroyed and the'] andI want to write 'people killed'. Can anyone think of a more emphatic way of writing 'people killed' to make a

greater impact on the reader? 'population wiped out'. OK, that's probably not an exaggeration.

[Wrote 'population wiped out'.] I'm going to make a link now with one of the less serious effects of thebombing which we've got on our plan. I'm starting with a connective phrase [wrote 'Even when it was realised

that this wasn't happening, the effect of the nightly bombing raids on children'] and I'd like you to completethis sentence on your white boards, please. Don't forget to use the checklists to help you Good,

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47

you've brought in the formal language of debate with that phrase so I'm going to use it and add in what the

others said about sleep being important for children's health. [Wrote 'convinced many people that childrenwould be safer and healthier if they could leave the city and have a proper night's sleep'.] We want to bring in

this point in favour of evacuation, [pointed to plan] that the food shortages were less severe in the country,so let's re-read what we've written so far, see how it sounds and then try to think of a way of linking in that

next sentence I agree, we need a connective that suggests further evidence. Can you see one on the

checklist? Good, 'moreover' will fit well, so start your next sentence with 'moreover' Well done,

you've also used a more technical term: 'malnourished' which gives a greater sense of suffering than 'didn't

have enough to eat' in this kind of writing, so we'll include that. [Wrote 'Moreover, many city children weremalnourished and food shortages were less of a problem in the country'.] Just re-read what we've done so

far today, and tell me if you think we could improve it by using any more features from the checklist

Listen carefully to what I want you to do next. In pairs, you're going to write paragraph 3, which will includeall the opposing arguments, and then the concluding paragraph. Use the checklists to help you, keep

re-reading what you've written and discuss each sentence before you write it. In the plenary, I'll be picking

out some of the points against evacuation that we put in our skeleton-frame and asking you how you

expressed that argument.

Plenary

Right, let's take this point from the plan, that evacuation was a bad idea because,some children lived with

much wealthier people while they were evacuated and that made it hard for them and their families when

they went back home. I'm going to ask for volunteers to read out how they wrote that into their argument,and I'd like the rest of you to listen carefully and see if you can identify the features they've used and how

they affect the argument Thank you. So who spotted one of the features on our checklist that the

boys used there? You've said the conditional verbs. Can you tell us why you think they thought that

would be effective? Boys, do you want to come back on that one? Yes, tell her your reasons

Would any pair like to read their version of that argument? Tomorrow we'll have a chance to look at thisagain to see if we can improve on what we've done together. Any different features used there?Good. I agree. The sentence 'Parents haunted by the image of children scarred physically and mentally by

the nightly bombings, have no alternative but to send them away to safety' is much more effective. Why?

Tomorrow we'll have a chance to look at this again to see if we can improve on what we've done together.

6125T COPY AVAILABITAR,

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