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Beverly lewis
TConfessionspeCial Movie ediTion
7
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Copght 1997 b B M. lw, inc.
Pubhd b Bthan Hou Pubh
11400 Hamph Anu south
Boomngton, Mnnota 55438
Bthan Hou Pubh a don o
Bak Pubhng Goup, Gand rapd, Mchgan
Pntd n th Untd stat o Amca
A ght d. No pat o th pubcaton ma b poducd, tod n a ta tm, o
tanmttd n an om o b an mano xamp, ctonc, photocop, codngwthout
th po wttn pmon o th pubh. T on xcpton b quotaton n pntd w.
isBN 978-0-7642-1111-9
T lba o Cong ha cataogd th ogna dton a oow:
lw, B
T conon / b B lw.p. cm.(T htag o lancat Count ; #2)
isBN 1-55661-867-0 (pbk.)
i. t. ii. s: lw, B, Htag o lancat Count ; 2.
Ps3562.e9383C6 1997
81354dc21 9721118
scptu quotaton on pag 219 om th Ho Bb, Nw intnatona von. Niv. Cop-
ght 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 b Bbca, inc. Ud b pmon o Zondan. A ght
d wodwd. www.zondan.com
T to a wok o cton. Wth th xcpton o cognzd htoca gu, a chaact,
nt, and th ttng o Hcko Hoow a th poduct o th autho magnaton. An m-
banc to an pon, ng o dad, concdnta.
Co dgn b Dan Tonbg, Dgn souc Cat sc
Photo ud wth pmon
HAllMArK CHANNel PreseNs ABelieve PiCUresANDODyssey NeWOrKs PrO-DUCiONBeverly leWis He CONFessiON KAie leClerC CAMerON DeANe seWAr
JUliA WHelANWiHADriAN PAUlANDsHerry sriNGFielD COsUMe DesiGNerNAAsHA lANDAUMUsiC Bylee HOlDriDGeCAsiNG DireCOrsviCOriA BUr-rOWs sCO BOlAND COrriGAN & JOHNsONeDiOrBriDGe DUrNFOrDPrODUC-iON DesiGNerJeNNiFer WyNN OKellyDireCOr OF PHOOGrAPHyDANKNeeCe PrODUCeD ByDAviD KAPPes CO-eXeCUive PrODUCers CiNDy BONDCHevONNe OsHAUGHNessyeXeCUive PrODUCersMAUrA DUNBAr BriAN BirDMiCHAel lANDON Jr. BAseD ON BOOK ByBeverly leWiselePlAy ByMiCHAellANDON Jr. & BriAN BirD DireCeD ByMiCHAel lANDON Jr.
13 14 15 16 17 18 19 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
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dediCaTion
o Jud Ang
Tank o kpng th ct
ando bng th da wth pa,
hapng t wth wng.
Wth gattud and o.
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abouT The auThor
Beverly leWis, bon n th hat o Pnnana Dutch
count, th New York imesbtng autho o mo than
nnt book. H to ha bn pubhd n n anguagwodwd. A kn ntt n h moth Pan htag ha
npd B to wt man Amh-atd no, bgnnng
wth Te Shunning, whch ha od mo than on mon cop.
Te Brethren wa honod wth a 2007 Cht Awad.
B wth h huband, Dad, n Cooado.
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auThors noTe
in wtng th oowng pag, m hat wa captud b Kat
motona pan and h dpat ach o tuth. H to now
contnu, jut da at h abandon th Amh communtand mo n wth Mnnont at. And wk beforeDan
Fh hockng tt a n Hcko Hoow. . . .
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parT i
On can n connt to cp
whn on an mpu to oa.
Hn K
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11
prologue: KaTherine
i mmb thng about m t gmp o Coun lda
ktchn. it wa modn a th da ong and a agow wthctct.
Bng a cuou th-a-od, id t out to ach th ght
wtch, makng dtmnd gunt a i tood on tpto, ttch-
ng m up . . . up wh pkng aound th wd doojamb
to th gown-up w watchng.
At at, m tt ng touchd th magc. O . . . and on,and o and on agan, i mad th ong wht cng ght buzz
and ck, pahng uocnt gam onto th oo and th
wapap. i mut pad that wa o a good mnut o
mo.
it wa Datwho tod m to top. ya mutnt b pan wth th
ght, Kat. ya mght bun um out, h ad ot but tn.
Tn h coopd m up n h ong am and cad m to th
ont oom wth th t o m Pan at.
Na twnt a at, i had to m at m nwd ntt
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
12
n th ght wtch ound n oom o Pt and lda
M Mnnont amhou. epca th hn god on n
th boadng oom i now cad hom.
Bng ad Od Od Amh mant id n d aound
uch anc thng, and o a good aon: th Ordnung, an un-
pokn t o chuch u and guaton that had put a damp
on m wod, dd, and, ottm, m thought, too.
i, ad nough, had gon and bokn tho aw, a o
thmhadnt kpt m conon pom to Bhop John, u-ng to dto a obddn guta. in tun o m wckdn,
i wa to b hunnd a th da o m .
All my life . . .
i, and on , i wa wng to go to th bhop and pnt
bnd m kn n ant contton, padng wth God and th
chuch mmbhp o mcon thn coud a nn ucha i b bought back nto th od o th Pop.
so Kat lapp, th ct adoptd daught o Amh pa-
nt, wa a good a dad. shunnng pactc w cad out
that wa n Hcko Hoowth wa thd bn n to o
th hundd a.
But what o Kathn Madm a nam and th a
m? W, i coudnt magn Katherinethnkng twc about a
knng conon o what id don. Not o o no mon.
T wa too much at tak.
st, th tad ach n m hat ptd, and omtm
on th cat o da, om hgh atop th cond-oo andng
wndow, i managd to mak out th now outn o a dtant
oo and doub chmnth od amhou wh i wa ad.
u, samu and rbcca lapp andton hou wa jut on
bugg m awa, up Hcko lan a bt, though t mght bn
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
13
a good hundd m on dak Dcmb da k toda. Cau
tandng h, tang m pat n th ac, t md m who
wod mght ad to a dp, dak pup i t t. stubbon a i
wa, though, i ud to g n to th ang pan o jcton.
And btaa. Woudnt t th mmo o th hunnng dap
a dak coud o m utu. in a pcua ot o wa, that wa
m aatonthat, and m Mnnont at.
i t hadnt bn o Pt and lda, i mght uccumbd to
dpa. But th had a wa o tatng m k i wa a andtu on o th am. Ca om m t da h.
M had bgun to opn up n mo wa than on. T
wa th takd to God, o ntanc. Wh, t wa downght
atonhng at tm. Oh, id had thm a bng o th
ma o and on though th a, but am doton and
th pa that oowd w band-nw to m. e o jou.And what ngng! T- and ou-pat hamon d th
hou nng at upp. M guta had ound a tm-
poa hom, and o had m bokn hat.
Anwng to Kathn ntad o Kat took om gt-
tng ud to, o u and o ctan. T wa no a wa to
chang omthng a comotab a ou own t nam jut
bcau on da ou up and dcdd ou w omon nw.
st, i wa dtmnd to t.
somtm lda had to ca m two and th tm to
catch m attnton. i uppo t want o much th ound o
Kathn that thw m ot wa atchng on to what th
nam tood o that wa th bggt tugg.
Fo tuth, i bongd to omon whod n known th
Odnung and t connng pactc, omon who undtood
a about th bu modn wod id md out on. M bth
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
14
moth, laua Mad-Bnnttshewa m tu kn. And
i coud tut what id bn tod, th woman wa dng o om
greislich, dadu da. i ndd to act quck, but th a n
m hat wa powu-tong. At t, t hd m at, n kpt
m om anng to d a ca o om tng out th tphon
hangng hgh on th wa n lda ktchn.
But th wasomthng i ddnt htat on. somthng no
amount o a coud kp m om dong. Coun lda do
m to town and doppd m o at th pttt baut hop id n. Cou, id n daknd th doo o on bo
jut ookd om a dtanc . . . and whd. Ddnt ha an ap-
pontmnt, but th took m ght n and cut and td m
ha jut th am.
Go b! What dom i t whn th co tatd np-
pn awa at m ong, unn ock thatd n bn cut mwho ong.
W, th wght o th wod ght o m, n a hap
o aubun ha a o th oo. i hook m had and th a
woohd though t, ca to m cap, and i akd m wh
on ath id watd o ong o omthng o awu nc.
T anw wa bound up n u and xpctaton am a
m wat-ngth ocktd up n a knot und a d co-
ng a th a. But th wa no nd o m to b cang
aound a hadu o ong, too-thck ha anmo. i wa to
do what i pad wth t . . . andm ac. Coth, too. A
wondu-good ng.
stang n th mo, i aw Kathn Mad pantd p
mng back at m. Whn h whpd, How do ou do? i
had th nd ound o h engh oc n m a. st,
t woud tak om pactc to gt t ght tm.
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
15
i achd up and an m ng though m houd-ngth
ha; hont, ng t o bounc and ga m th h.
T nw cut ga m omthng , too. A cutan o ot cu!you ha bautu natua wa, Kathn, th bautcan
ad wth a bg m.
What a da! T cu, o ong hddn, had na mad th
appaanc. i wa mo than gatu and tod h o.
A o lda tphon, i azd i coudnt b watn to u
t anmo. Coudnt t th a hod m down, o i got aba. F da at comng to n th anc houd
wth ctct, mcowa on, ocd a hat . . . and th
tat, pttt Chtma t id ni pckd up th
lancat phon dcto and mad m ad a about how
to da up a ong-dtanc opato.
Tn cong th pag, i thought about th n i wa about
to commt. Woud i n top tang om th path o gh-
toun? smd to m id nnd o awu much, though, what
woud on mo tangon hut?
A n o ugnc wpt o m. M natua moth wa
dng . . . h wantd to m. Iwantd to h, to know
th woman namd laua, wh h wa.
enough o th pondng o m aut and mdd. itwa hgh tm to tak th t tp towad ndng m oot. A
gant tp, to b u.
i achd o th tphon. . . .
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17
ChapTer one
it wa dak and btt cod whn laua tund om th at-
ton ofc. sh wa wa and ghd audb, bang th
wght o th mot cnt appontmnt.
Todo Wam, h ongtm chauu, pd at ho th athd ont at o th moun. M. Bnntt,
a ou a ght?
A bt td, h pd. Pa dont b concnd.
v w cam th dp t gnt oc.
sh aowd h to an had agant th backat, wat-
ng o Todo a h mad h wa aound to th tunk. Oh,how h ongd o th da o mobt, dom to com and
go a h pad. Coud t ha bn on on month ago hd
bad th cod and th dtanc, hng h d to tak h
to a mot Amh communt n Pnnana? sh hadnt t
up to uch a tp n thn, but at at h had bn ab to gt
aound wh th, wthout much hp.
rgttab, th md-Nomb jaunt had tund up not a
ng ad. H daughth on chdhad not matazd,
n though Todo had o wng backtackd to aou
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
18
pot n and aound Hcko Hoow bo dng hom th
nxt da, back to th pac o h chdhood n th Fng lak
gon o Nw yok.
yt, n pt o th ut ach, h had hd tubbon to on
ma hopthat an Amhwoman ttng n a caag n ont o
a gna to mght ha oowd though wth laua qut.
sh had ntatd th d woman to d h pona tt
to on o th man rbcca ng n th communtpc-
ca, to th onlyrbcca who woud undtand th dpat,handwttn pa. T woman who adoptd daught wa to
cbat h twnt-thd bthda nxt umm, Jun th. . . .
T ama ound o laua mpt whcha, t thn t
makng contact wth th cod pamnt, bought h om h
. sh bgan to taghtn h a bt, dng owad n that a bt h coud, dpt h a and waknd condton.
in an ntant, h chauu, dd n a taod back ut and
ocoat, opnd th ca doo. sh ngd a momnt, tuggng
to button th top o h coat agant th gd a a Todo
tood n adn bhnd th whcha. ro! M Judah!
h cad towad th hou. M. Bnntt ha tund.
in th pac o a w cond, th houmad ad, o-
owd b laua -n nu. T two womn gnt atd
th mt o th hou, ang h out o th back ca and
ttng h nto th whcha.
Todo paud judcou, thnsha w go?
laua ga a ght nod and wa cautou whd o th
wd, ccua dh powd om a cnt nowtom
and nto th udo-t manon.
A magncnt Chtma t tood ntn n th con o
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
19
th xpan ntwa, adond wth wht do and amb to
pnt dn pac and th lamb o God pct. T
w o cam-cood o, o ta, cump o dd bab
bath and hdanga, and hundd o twnkng wht ght.
laua bathd n th pn cnt, hng th ch hoda
aganc. Will I live to see another Christmas Day?h wondd,
gancng awa om th nomou t.
sh ought back ta. Will I live to see my Katherine face-to-face?
Fathu Todo gudd h cha down hmmng mabha to th wd Fnch doo n th outh wng o th Bnntt
tat, at whch pont th nab gntman tppd ad,
nquhng th job to Nata Judah, th nu. Do ha a
good nng, M. Bnntt, h ad n a na whp.
Oh, i w, and ou a mutnt wo. Tn, motonng
o hm to an co, h ad, rmmb . . . not a wod toanon. A w agd?
A ou wh. Bo taghtnng to h u hght, Todo
pud a ong nop om h t pockt. sha i tnd to th
matt on ou bha?
laua had on to nod.
Cond t don, M. Bnntt. Good nng. And h
wa gon.
Onc ttd n th commodou ut o oom, laua aowd
Nu Judah to at n mong th wap hd donnd o h
and. Tat don, h xtndd h am a Nata chckd h
pu wth a gnt touch. Fownng, th oung rNdd a
n wht, ncudng ho and hothn md th antt o
m and pattd laua am. you had a tnuou atnoon,
h makd, tunng to pak to ro. i thnk t woud b
bt to upp h . . . n M. Bnntt pat quat.
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
20
ro bt h p momnta, thn mad an obou attmpt
to conca h concn and cam na th whcha, tng h
hand ght on laua houd. i to t.
laua watchd a h nu t about ppang to admnt
th gua nng njcton o mophn. rtcnt and dg,
h tad at th nd. i ou dont mnd, coudnt t wat . . .
phap o jut a wh? h akd, not ctan wh hd mad
uch a qut.
Oh? A ou xpncng om knd o dcomot? Naua?Pan?
T tuth wa, th had bn no ct o h atnoon
outng. id jut k to t a bt . . . t bn a tng da, h
pd.
W mut b mo cau om now on, Nata pmandd
ot. you mutnt odo, M. Bnntt.laua undtood pct, o h mot cnt attack had
com on wth xc atgu and motona t, o much o
h had mad th dcon to mo h oom to th man oo,
pma out o concn o h huband.
A man o dcpnd wok hou, man o whch w pnt
n h upta ofc ut, Dan Bnntt wa a dtactd,
and what wth h ndng contant mdca attnton, and wth
Nu Judah and ro comng and gong at a hou, h had
ocatd. Mo connnt o a concnd. indd, essential
o oth aon unknown to h huband o nn a.
A a at nw blaua had bcom a Chtan
th a poh mantand h han Fath wa n
conto o h and that o h ong-ot chd. Mo
cnt, h had bgun to pa n ant o God w a to
h and Kathn unona unon h huband mght not
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
21
wcom. A ota atnoon woud ufc o uch a t, but
h knw n th dpth o h bng t mut b oon . . .
oon, bo th cppng da adancd to cam h .
T pa and dotona tm h njod wth oth Ch-
tan womnro ao, h pona houmad, n pa-
tcuahad bcom a thon pobm, pntng omthng
o a nuanc o Dan. H huband, who dd not ha h
nwound ath, had dcouagd h om hang Bb tud
and pa goup on th pm. Had h put h oot downand about dnd h th oca and ptua outt, h
woud ha obd, out o pct. sh coud on pa that
Dan woud n ot to uch a hah mau.
Dung on uch dcou, laua had to gnt mnd hm
that th tat, n act, wa ga hh chdhood hom
hang bn t to h upon th dath o h wdowd moth,Chaott Mad, tw a a. T commnt wa not
w cd b Dan, caung mo o a t btwn thm.
en o, laua woud occaona nt a chuch nd o
two o an ntmat gathng, tutng that omda n God
pct tm, Dan mght jon h n th tud o th scptu.
Mo mpotant, that h woud com to nd pac wth th
sao o hm.
it had not occud to h, how, that b makng aang-
mnt to at h w, h mght b addng u to th aad
tom dbat. in act, not unt M. Canton, h atton
and pat coun, had mntond t toda had h n
condd th matt to b an u. H utmat dcon
wa not bon o a ndct agnda; h wa m oow-
ng th oottp o h nb and ong moth. Tat wa
th xtnt o t.
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
22
But h mut b dct. And, o now, Dan wa not to b
th w.
ooo
Nata Judah wnt n ach o h patnt wamt pp,
mong quck pat th o dng oom aa, compt wth
jacuzz bath and ant, towad th ag wak-n cot. On th
wa, h gappd wth h gowng motona attachmnt to
th knd t dtmnd woman h had bn agnd to nuthough a poongd and dfcut n.
Laura Bennett. A woman wth o tt t n h.
Nothng n Nata mdca tanng had ppad h o
th ntn mpath h had com to xpnc wth h t
n-hom patnt, a woman much too oung to b dng. in act,
Nata had ound t pactca mpob to mantan, a hd
bn taught, a mbanc o poona dtachmnt n th
ac o laua Bnntt ng-mndd goaobon, n. so
wth a th nung k at h command, Nata had dt-
mnd to do h bt to kp M. Bnntt a to az h
ondt damto mt th daught hd gn awa at bth,
th nant who woud b now b a oung woman.
sad, a th pntd a a dmma. T objctthat do th poo woman had th capact to uth wakn
h, both phca and mnta.
At tm, h patnt dagno to at Nata hat, o mag-
nant mutp co wa an xpo pog da. sh dd
not ha to b owand a to how th na tag woud pa out.
ooo
laua gazd wth ntt at th mnatu twn Chtma
t pchd on th ch oa tab aco th oom on th
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
23
dg o h aot btan damak ug. rd t bow
and ong tand o woodn bad ganhd th matchng t,
pndnt n wthout tn o ght. sh thought o a thChtma h had md wth h daught, th n-ndng
ppaaton, th gaa nt uoundng th aon . . . h,
compt dod o th aught o chdn.
Had Kathn a a oungt an n o wth th pndo,
th muc o Cht bthda? laua ghd a h thought fw
backwad n tm. What ot o thng dd Amh ok do tocbat? h wondd. Had Kathn com to know th tu-
t gncanc o th bd aon? laua coud on aum
o, o u th Amh knw and od th Bb a h dd.
lttng h mnd wand, h condd th Pan commu-
nt hd ct td at month wh achng o gn o
Kathn. What wasth chanc o an Amh am gng up
on o th own knb bood o othwto pnd tm
wth a tang, and a n pon to a dpat pa?
sh thought back to th cuca tt, and h had bn
ab to tand and wak to h wtng dk, h woud ha
don o, o n th naowt daw a a cop o h mag
to rbcca, th adopt moth o h chd. st, h knw t
b hat wod o t.
Te baby girl I gave to you has been living in my heart all
these years. I must speak the truth and say I am sorry I ever gave
her away. Now, more than ever, because, you see, I am dying.
Onc agan, h dtd to th dntca Chtma t.
T bow and bad dazzd h, and h knw wh, a a g,
h aot coo had bn d and gn. sh tad dp nto
th dn banch, dadamng o oth hoda . . . th bz,
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
24
caua da o ghood, a bo h pcou bab daught
wa concd.
a pang to h . Tn, wthout wanng, th coo
bgan to bu. laua t th hdou mucua jkng, tatng on
h t d. Fghtnd and xpncng ntn pan, h pacd
both hand on h thgh, pang nt o th tmo to ca.
Whn th dd not, h mod h hand ow om h
upp g, hopng to conca h tu condton om th bu-
ntt nu who had jut com nto th oom, cang ubu pp. laua quzd h ng togth, ockng thm
nto a odd poton, and pd thm had agant h ap.
Nata wa not to b ood, how. M. Bnntt, i a
mut g ou a hot now . . . beoreou upp com. T
ot-pokn woman toopd to mo laua ho, pacng
thm wth h aot hou pp. Nu Judah o and o-d a aung m, gng laua th couag to accpt th
ntmdatng njcton.
Tn, bo th dug wa admntdwh th nu
ppad th ngth dadu dzzn bgan. Dung th
pat a da, ght-haddn had qunt accompand
th nzd tmbng. it wa at uch momnt h woud o
conto and c out, ghtng o h pan wth th bt antdot
h knw. Oh, lod Ju, pa . . . pa hp m, h woud
pa, whmpng.
Nu Judah wabbd th n gnt. T mot cotton ba
mad a chng, unwcom path aong th ca o laua am.
Can ou mak a t, M. Bnntt?
it wa a h coud do to coopat at t, but ow laua
wd h bod to ax, and a th mdcaton ntd h bood-
tam, th mophn bgan to wok t mac.
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
25
At th uncontoab quakng had cad, a coud o x-
hauton gathd o h. in th mdt o th han, laua
thought o h ong-ot g and ad h own tm wa hot.
ooo
Todo Wam mad h wa out o th hou to th m-
oun t pakd n ont o th gand ntanc. Gttng nto
th ca, h thought o M. Bnntt ntnc on bng dn
downtown toda. shd ctan not ookd w; anon coud that. But h md dtmnd, at a cot, to dcu h
at w and ttamnt wth M. Canton.
Todo upcon coud not b qudth ang woman
mut ha t n h mnd that h want ong o th ath, o
t wa th ugnc n ro ao oc, whn hd phond at
noon on bha o th mt, that had atd hm.M. Bnntt w not b atd t ou ag to tak h,
th mad had ad, tatng qut ca that no on woud
do. sh nt on hangyou . . . and kp qut about t, too.
it wa th att mak that wod hm gat.
A mo kndhatd ad Todo had n mt, and bcau
M. Bnntt wa not on to ngag n manpuaton o dct,
h wa mod to hp h a h had on at at on pou oc-
caon. T mmo d hm tthat dadu da whn t
wa dcod h huband, hwd man that h wa, had bn
ca wth th da ad account.
it wa thn that th mt had takn Todo nto h con-
dnc, a ath a and pondou poton o an od Bth
o n h mpo. But hd pud t oand qut ucc-
u, tooaangng to d h to an ndpndnt aw m,
on compt docd om Dan Bnntt own account and
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26
nanca dang. o th da, and a a a Todo knw, th
man had not th antt knowdg o an o t. Non what.
Pudnc dctatd that Todo woud contnu to kp thtdbt a qut a th pnt atnoon joun, whnh had
a mot omnou ngM. Bnntt had gon and atd
h w.
H pakd th back mo bd th wht on, thn opnd h
ocoat, achng nto h utcoat pockt, wh h pud out
th ong nn nop, unad. H woud not ntgat tcontnt, to b u, and nc t wa too at to cu t n M.
Bnntt a dpot box tonght, h ockd up th nop n
th go compatmnt o th ca and hadd o th gathou.
Ill take care of it tomorrow, h tod hm. Yes, indeed. First
thing tomorrow.
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27
ChapTer Two
lda M tund o Hcko lan and onto th dt dwa
adjacnt to th amhou. sh pakd h ca n th dtachd
gaag bodng th contd ban, wh h huband andtwo o th odt on had, a ago, t up a woodwokng
hop on th man . sh aw that th ght w t on n
th ofc aa. Notcng, too, th abundanc o ght tamng
om na a th wndow on th d o th houupta
ncuddh chuckd, makng h wa aco th now ban-
ad, am ha wth two ack o goc.Katie Lapps certainly having herself a heyday, h thought. T
ctc b wa u to ct t.
Appoachng th hou, lda wondd what t mght bn
k to gow up Amh wth w, an, comot o a modn
hom. T m thought o ga amp, batt-opatd wat
pump, and ho and bugg mad h gatu o th dcon
h d pant had mad ong agochoong a conat
Mnnont owhp o th Amh chuch.
Whn Kat opnd th back doo, lda amot ogot to
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
28
add h b th nw nam but caught h n tm. How
wa ou atnoon . . . Kathn?
A m a bght a a anbow cod th oung woman
ac. i ud th tphon toda o th t tm.Ach, t ant
o awu had, i gu.
lda huggd h houd. it b od hat oon nough.
Jah, i hop o.
sttng h goc on th tab, lda tund to th nk
and bgan wahng h hand. Tn, wth Kat hp, h putawa th dcountd box o dhwahng dtgnt and an
aa o oth houcanng upp. so . . . whod ou ca,
t an o m bun?
i takd to a ad opato n rocht, Nw yok . . . i
Gancng o at Kat, lda hud to t h at a. No nd
o th da backwad g to dug th nt phon cona-ton. Tat a ght, a t. you dont ha to t m mo.
Oh, but i want to! Kat cod th gato doo and
uhd to lda d. i cant b what i dd toda! Hont,
i cant.
studng th oung woman nxt to h, lda nd th
anng. so, t m, what dd ou do? h akd ot, won-
dng h coun daught had aad attmptd to ocat
th ang bth moth.
Kat pud out a ktchn cha and at down, touchng h
ong aubun ock, owng n wa cu. H bown
pakd, and lda notcd a tac o makup. T a
ot-ght pop wth th at nam o Bnntt.
Fot-ght? e , uch a ot o ong-dtanc ca.
Fom what Mamma mmbd, laua omwh na
rocht, i thnk. A ct that ound omthng k Canada.
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
29
W, ha ou ookd on th map t?
Jut th on n th phon book, a know, to gt th ght aa
cod. Kat bamd, ookng ght poud o hpoud n
a good wa, no doubtbng ab to pout o modn thng
k aa cod and uch.
How on ath w ou know ou ocatd th ght pon?
Kat noddd. Coud b awu tck, i pct. But i ha
omgut. . . uh,good. . . da.
lda ghd, ng omwhat d. Tn ou hantmad an pona ca th t?
Not jut t. T htanc n th g oc wa dnt. i
wantd to ak ou pmon t . . . t ou know im wng
to pa o a th ong-dtanc ca i mght hata mak.
Tn w houd gt bu. lda ocatd a book o map
om th h und h con cupboad. H, t ha aook-. Mab w can nd a ct n Nw yok that ound
k Canada.
T put th had togth, anng o th map on th
ktchn tablda, pm uppotng h Mnnont cap;
Kat uncod ha hnng, toud cu pngng , at
odd wth h upbngng.
At achng and not ndng anthng, lda chckd th
ndx o ct n Nw yok. H pont ng d down th
pag a h cacuatd ach nt. H on, h ad. i won-
d, coud th b t? sh pontd to Canandaigua. sound a
bt k Canada to m. And th popuaton ath ma, o
th houdnt b a man Bnntt to ca.
Kat aughd. Ach, ou hmd jut thn.
i dd at that.
T two womn chuckd m and t about ppang
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
30
upp. Kat pd potato wh lda wamd up to
ham and buttd gn ban n th mcowa on.
Ha ou thought o pang about ou ach? ntud
lda. it woud b a w thng to ak ou han Fath o
H gudanc. Dont ou thnk o?
Kat kpt png potato kn wthout ookng up. i dont
know how to pa thatawa. Ddnt an, a. N thought
t wa th ght ot o thng to b dong, nth.
W, i b i know jut th pon to tach ou, ldapd, an xctd ng wng up n h. Jut th on.
lookng up, Kat bok nto a h m. Ach, a?
i woudnt oo ou about omthng k that. lda tund
and wnt to gaz out th ag ba wndow, amd n hangng
n. M huband ha taught man a ou to pa, Kat.
Katherine, Kat mndd h.lda wa nt. Fo a momnt, h cam co to apoogzng
but t t go th tm. sh had condd th aa o rbcca
lapp on daught a omwhat o a mxd bng. T poo
thng wa a gopng h wa th da, ntng on a anc
nam k Kathn Mad. Pcua, t wa. T, and th
act that h and Pt homddcatd to th lod wok
a agoand th co poxmt to th Amh communt,
mad t ath connnt o th oung woman to un om h
pat and nt a oom outd h chuch dtct.
lda wondd h wa dong th ght thng b th hunnd
g. And what o samu and rbcca lapp . . . and th on?
What mut theyb ng?
T tuaton ppxd h, and h had th oddt naton
oa. Wh pondng a, hd wondd wh Kat had
actd o hah to h pant kpng h adopton a ct.
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
31
Wa th what had caud th oung woman to dn h own
dntt? O wa t th hunnngth hatndng wa hd
bn tatd b th Popthat had changd thng o?
lda hook h had, bwdd. sh coudnt gt o th
oung woman wod cothng. shd ot no tm n bung a
anc d woo kt and that hn atn bou wth w o d,
bu, and god ow, o a thng. sh gud Kat mut
u had h g, too, bcau h wa wang th ht
o ho at. And uch a hado! A wa, and oh, o muchhot than an Pan womanAmh o Mnnontwoud
da to thnk o wang.
Kat houd-ngth ha bothd lda to no ndth g
wa contant ngng t and tong t about. T uua had
cong wa mng. O cou, now, what wth a o Kat
bght-cood coth, th d cap woud ook comptout o pac.
sh ghd and tund om th wndow, touchng th back
o h own cap, Mnnont n tng. su th wa a dout
Pan womancad Kathddn awa omwh nd
th nw modn g.
su th wa.
ooo
Kathn oom wa hgh n th hou, tuatd und th
a, and nat a a pn. T m o ac had aad bgun to
pmat th oom bcau o th man handmad acht hd
bought wth h om hom.
T wa a down-d comot a dckd out wth unn
ow tup, and a wht-and-ow tpd bdkt that ancd
up th ou-pot bd. T pac wa mght ag, t dnt
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
32
om anthng hd n n an Amh houhod. And th
map untu, everypcthank to Coun Pt wood-
wokng kmatchd th oth: a tp d wth wd,
moab mo; a ta cht o daw wth bght, coou
do; and two qua amp tab.
No dak gn wndow bnd, cod hadwood foo, o moun-
tan o Amh qut. Ao notcab abnt wa an gn o a
cda cht, wh a ng woman coud to hand-ttchd
tm, awatng h wddng da.Kathn buhd ad th annong thought. shd gon
and un out on h own wddng, ang a dgutd wdow-
goom bhnd. A man whod tund out to b th tnt bhop
Hcko Hoow had knownBhop John B, th m-
po odie Meindingth hunnng.
Ach! T thought o t tung h to th co. But h waKathn now. Bod, ou, and pt.
sh tad at th oot o th bd wh a hop cht mght
bn. want o mpotant to ha uch a thng n a oom o
nt. st, h coudnt hp cang th man o tm hd
mad dung th a n ppaaton o h wddd utu. A
o t, at hand-wn pc, hd packd awa n th lapp
attc. Jut thnkng o t, h had to augha chokd oundo
t wa th dut attc o h chdhood hom, wh thng
had bgun to cumb and chang.
Cong th oom, h wnt to t n th uphotd cha
na a bautu dapd wndow. sh td h td t to
th haock and t out a wa gh. Abo h, th cng ght
hon bght, and h dcdd a h axd that th oom wa
h han agant th wod. T wod o h Pop who had
pcd h ou.
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T h e C o n f e s s i o n
33
Shunned . . . for all time. . . . Onc agan, h wa tckn wth
th paazng thought.
Pupo, h tad at th god ght wtch aco th oom,
and Coun lda wod ckd though h mnd.Ask our
heavenly Father for guidance, th Mnnont woman had ad.
But KatKathnhad no da how to do uch a thng.
H tct Amh oot wnt too dp n h, mab. st, h
mutnt accpt that a a aon notto pa Coun lda wa.
Bd, h wantd to bak a t wth h pat, o panga ou w takng to God . . . now, that woud b on wa
to go about t.
sh got up and knt bd th cha. Da Fath n han,
th a Mnnont downta who a i houd tak to th . . .
, ou, about ndn m a moth. i do hop thou, uh,you
wont b mndng too much. . . .sh toppd. such a tang wa to pak to th Amght. sh
otd to bchng Hm n Gman, a h wa accutomd.
O Herr Gott, himmlischer Vater, h bgan.
it wa dfcutno, downght boto ak anthng p-
ona o th lod God, han Fath, pca nc h wa
n bad-acd dobdnc to H commandmnt. so h ddnt
mak a qut at a but ctd a pa om Christenpficht,
th tandad Amh pa book, ntad o a pontanou on.
At th pa wa don, h t a though hd bokn ath
wth th nw pon h wa attmptng to bcomKathn
Mad.
Bo gttng o h kn, h pd th bod guta ng
und th doub bd. rtng t, h at on th haock,
xhaaton pacng h adn a h tummd th onc-
obddn tng.
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B e v e r l y l e w i s
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T ong h ang w od on, om hd mad up
a a tt chd. Anoth wa a ow tun, on h and h t
o, Dan Fhwhod downd n a ang accdnt a bohad wttn togth dung th at wk o h .
Dan, h tu hopd, woud b pad up th n Go h
knw what h pan w o tomoow. H wa a ptd a,
Dan Fh. N ga up tng t h got what h wantd.
epca whn t cam to gon and th Bb.
sh mmbd hm bng mght tubbon o a oungAmhmankd to amod h da though to tho who
ddnt to wth hm.
Kathn ang on.
Dont prejudge the dead, h coud ha th concntou oc
o rbcca lapp, h Amh mamma. H Gott wa th na
Judg whn a wa ad and a wa don. T Amght On wa
ogn. Com Judgmnt Da, Hewoud dcd what woud
bcom o h da Beau tna ou.
loud h ang, dng th thought o Dan bng
anwh but n Bd Paad. N bo and n agan
had omon undtood o od h mo. And tomoow,
Dan wa ookng down on h, hd mak hm gn . . . chuck,
mab.sh pannd on ung Coun lda tphon to da up that
ong-dtanc opato n Canandagua. sh woud not g up
t h got hod o a woman namd laua Mad-Bnntt.
laua, who woud undtand pct. laua, who woud ct
th da o h daught bth and a at at, Wcom hom,
Kathn.What a n, wondu-good da that woud b.
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35
ChapTer Three
Kathn watd o th hou to ca out a bt bo hadng
to th ha phon th nxt monng. shd wttn and wttn
th dcto atanc numb o ong dtanc on a catch
pad om th ktchn, antcpatng th momnt.But whn h wakd up th ta and appoachd th t-
phon, h coud on ta at t. T w o man thng to
b thnkng about. i h pckd up that phon . . .
Hmm. it jut mght b bt not to know anthng about h
natua moth, a. Mght b bt to a w nough aon.
H da nd Ma stotzu woud a, stck to don thght thng, Kat. W, h wa to do th ght thng, woud
h b tandng h n th Mnnont hou th mnut?
sh huggd o th cppng thought. H hat, actud
and b, ntd on knowng th tuth.
But whn h got up th couag to da th numb, th
ctonc anwng c cam on th n. Kathn watd,
ntng on pakng wth a a opato.
What ct? th woman akd.
Canandagua.