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Butterflies in Your
StomachDawn Huebner, PhD
Psychologist/Author
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“Your goal in life is not to get rid of the butterflies in your stomach
but to teach them to fly in formation.”
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“Your goal in life is not to get rid of the butterflies in your stomach
but to teach them to fly in formation.”
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1 in 8
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1 in 8 children have anxiety significant enough to interfere with the basic tasks of childhood:
•To learn
•To make friends
•To have fun
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“Side-by-sidewith butterflies”
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“Blah. Blah. Blah. If something is hard, do it!
Blah. Blah. Blah. Then do it some more.”
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What if . . . ???
• What if my stomach hurts while I’m at school?
• What if I get sick? And everyone sees me!
• What if my mom forgets to pick me up?
• What if she was in an accident?
• What if my mom dies?
• What if I stop breathing?
• What if I choke?
• What if I die?
• What if this food is bad?
• What if I get stung by a bee?
• What if I don’t know anyone?
• What if I’m the worst swimmer?
• What if I mess up on my spelling test?
• What if I put my paper in the wrong place?
• What if my teacher gets mad at me?
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Anxious Thoughts
Anxious Feelings
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Fight or Flight
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Safety Behavior
An action designed to keep a person safe.
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Safety behaviors are entirely logical,
given the worry thoughts that trigger them.
• Worry: What if my stomach hurts while I’m at school?
• Safety behavior: Skip breakfast.
• Worry: What if I get sick? In front of everyone?
• Safety behavior: Stay home.
• Worry: What if my mom forgets to pick me up?
• Safety behavior: Ask her again and again.
• Worry: What if I get stung by a bee?
• Safety behavior: Stay inside.
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Anxiety Flow Chart
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Anxiety Flow Chart
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Being afraid Being in danger
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The 4 A’s
•Alert
•Alarm
•Assess
•All clear
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The 4 A’s
•Alert
•Alarm
•Assess Avoid
•All clear
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The 4 A’s
•Alert
•Alarm
•Assess
•All clear
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“The 3 Steps”
•Calm your body
•Change your thoughts
•Face your fears
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Crazy 8 Breaths
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“The 3 Steps”
•Calm your body
•Change your thoughts
•Face your fears
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Thinking Mistakes
•Overestimating danger and threat
• Expecting the worst
• Underestimating ability to cope
•Needing certainty
• Perfectionism
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Brain Correction
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Reassurance Brain Corrections
• Worry: You’re going to get sick!
• Reassurance: I’m not going to get
sick.
• Brain Correction: I feel this way a
lot and I usually don’t get sick.
• Worry: What if there’s a monster
upstairs?
• Reassurance: There is no monster.
• Brain Correction: Monsters aren’t
real and besides, I’ve been upstairs
2693 times and nothing bad has
ever happened.
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Reassurance Brain Corrections
• Worry: What if the plane crashes?
• Reassurance: It isn’t going to crash.
• Brain Correction: There are so
many safety procedures in place.
Thousands of planes fly every day
without crashing.
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Reassurance Brain Corrections
• That’s just my worry talking to me.
• That’s a bunch of junk.
• I don’t need to fall for that.
• I don’t need to pay attention.
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“The 3 Steps”
•Calm your body
•Change your thoughts
•Face your fears
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Brain Corrections
• “That bee isn’t interested in me, he just wants to get some pollen.”
• “Bees are more interested in plants than people. If I go about my business, he’ll continue to do his own thing, too.”
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Anxiety Flow Chart
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