INSIDE:•Meetingapersonwithadisability•Engagingapersonwhouses
awheelchair•Meetingsomeonewitha
cognitiveimpairment•Andmore…
Don’t let fear and uncertainty keep you from
getting to know people with disabilities.
Fear of the unknown and lack of knowledge
about interacting can lead to uneasiness
when meeting a person who has a disability.
Remember: a person with a disability is a
person with feelings. Treat him or her as
you would want to be treated, and then
let common sense and friendship break
down any barriers you may encounter.
Disability Etiquette:ENGAGING PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES
Meeting a person with a disability
1. A handshake is NOT a standard greeting for everyone.Whenindoubt,ASKthepersonwhetherheorshewouldliketo shakehandswithyou.Asmilealongwithaspokengreetingisalwaysappropriate.
2. Speak directly to the person with a disability,notjusttopersonswhomaybeaccompanyinghimorher.
3. Don’t mention the person’s disability,unlessheorshetalksaboutitoritisrelevanttotheconversation.
4. Treat adults as adults.Don’tpatronizeortalkdowntopeoplewithdisabilities.Likewise,don’tlavishpraiseonaperson withadisabilityforhavingthe“courage”toovercomeadisability.
5. Be patient and give your undivided attention, especiallywithsomeonewhospeaksslowlyorwithgreateffort.
6. Never pretend to understand what a person is saying.Askthepersontorepeatorrephrase.
7. It is okay to use common expressionslike“seeyousoon”or“I’dbetterberunningalong.”
8. Relax. We all make mistakes. Offeranapologyifyouforgetsomecourtesy.Keepasenseofhumorandawillingness tocommunicate.
Interacting with a wheelchair user
1. Personal space –Donotpush,leanon,orholdontoaperson’swheelchairunlessthepersonasksyouto. Thewheelchairispartofhisorherpersonalspace.
2. Eye-to-Eye –Trytoputyourselfateyelevelwhentalkingwithsomeonein awheelchair.Sitorkneelinfrontoftheperson.
3. Clear a path –Rearrangefurnitureorobjectstoaccommodatea wheelchairbeforethepersonarrives.
4. Know the geography –Ifasked,knowwheresomeonecanfind accessiblerestrooms,telephones,andwaterfountainsinthebuilding.
5. Directions – Whengivingdirectionstoapersoninawheelchair, considerdistance,weatherconditions,andphysicalobstacles (curbs,stairs,steephills,etc.).
Meeting someone with a cognitive impairment that affects learning, intelligence, or brain function
1. Keep your communication simple.Useshortsentencesandrephrase commentsorquestionsforbetterclarity.
2. Stay on pointbyfocusingononetopicatatime.
3. Allow the person timetorespond,askquestionsandclarify yourcomments.
4. Focus on the personasheorsherespondstoyouandpayattention tobodylanguage.
5. Repetition.Ifappropriate,repeatbackanymessagestoconfirm mutualunderstanding.
Engaging someone who is blind or has a disability that affects vision
1. Greetings –Whenmeetingtheperson,identifyyourselfandintroduceotherswhomay bepresent.
2. Departing – Don’tleavethepersonwithoutexcusingyourselffirst.
3. Guiding –Whenaskedtoguidesomeone,neverpushorpulltheperson.Offeryourarmand allowhimorhertoreachforyou,thenwalkslightlyahead.Pointoutdoors,stairs,andcurbs asyouapproachthem.
4. The landscape – Asyouguideapersonintoaroom,describethelayout,thelocation offurniture,andnotewhoelseisnearby.
5. Details matter – Bespecificwhendescribingthelocationofobjects. (Example:“Thereisachairthreefeetfromyouateleveno’clock.”)
6. Guide dogs – Don’tpetordistractaguidedog.Thedogisresponsibleforitsowner’s safetyandisalwaysworking.Itisnotapet.
Meeting a person with a disability that affects speech
1. Pay attention, be patient, and waitforthepersontocompleteawordor thought.Donotfinishitfortheperson.
2. Ask the person to repeat what is saidifyoudonotunderstand.Tellthe personwhatyouheardandseeifitisclosetowhatheorsheissaying.
3. Be prepared for persons who use assistive technologytoenhanceor augmentspeech.Don’tbeafraidtocommunicatewithsomeonewho usesanalphabetboardoracomputertocommunicate.
Communicating with someone who is deaf or uses an assisted hearing device
1. Let the person take the leadinestablishingthecommunicationmode, suchaslip-reading,signlanguage,orwritingnotes.
2. Talk directly to the personevenwhenasignlanguageinterpreter ispresent.
3. If the person lip-reads,facehimorherdirectly,speakclearlyand withamoderatepace.
4. With some peopleitmayhelptosimplifyyoursentencesand usemorefacialexpressionsandbodylanguage.
Service animals
1. It takes all kinds –Serviceanimalscomeinallshapesandsizes. Inadditiontothe traditionalguidedog,avarietyofdogsandotherserviceanimalsmaydetectseizures beforetheyoccur,enhancetherapiesforchildrenwithautism,provideacalming presenceforadults,orassistwithawiderangeofdailylivingactivities.
2. Engaging animal –Aserviceanimalisaphysicalextensionofapersonwitha disabilityandistheretowork. Itmaybetemptingtopetorcallforaservice animal’sattention.However,forthesafetyandwell-beingoftheteamask permissionfromtheserviceanimal’sownerfirst.
3. Questions–Thelawvarieswidelysoifyouhaveaspecificquestion,please contacttheTennesseeDisabilityCoalition.
Using appropriate language
Lifeformostpeoplewithmentalorphysicaldisabilitieshasvastlyimprovedoverthepastfortyyears.However,somethingshavebeenslowtochange;namely,attitudesandperceptionsaboutpeoplewithdisabilities.Theuseofoutdatedlanguageandwordstodescribepeoplewithdisabilitiescontributestoperpetuatingoldstereotypes.
Ifpublicopinionaboutpeoplewithdisabilitiesistoevolve,thenawarenessandusageofmoreappropriatelanguageneedstobecomepartofeverydaydiscourse.
1. Disability relevance –Donotrefertoaperson’sdisabilityunlessitisrelevanttoasituationordiscussion.
2. Disability vs. handicap –Theuseoftheword“handicap”isconsideredoffensive,andthepreferredtermis“disability.” Generally,itisonlyacceptabletouse“handicap”whenreferringtoaccommodationssuchashandicapparking, althoughaccessibleparkingispreferredtoday.
3. People first language – Say“personwithadisability”ratherthana“disabledperson.”Thisemphasizesthatindividuals withdisabilitiesarepeoplefirstandthusshouldnotbedefinedbytheirdisability.
4. Referencing groups – Avoidreferringtoagroupofindividualsasthedisabled,quadriplegics,ortheretarded.Instead, usereferencessuchas“personswithadisability,”“personswithquadriplegia,”and“personswithanintellectual disability.”Anexceptioninvolvespeoplewhoaredeafandpreferthephrase“TheDeaf.”
5. Negative and sensational descriptions – Donotsay“suffersfrom,”“avictimof,”“afflictedwith,”or“crippled.”Neversay “invalid.”Theseportrayalselicitunwantedsympathy,orworse,pitytowardindividualswithdisabilities.
6. Gratuitous, but well-meaning praise –Don’tportraypeoplewithdisabilitiesasoverlycourageous,brave,special,or superhumanbecausetheyhave“overcome”adisability.Doingsoimpliesthatitisunusualforpeoplewithdisabilities tohavetalents,skills,andtheabilitytocontributeinsociety.
7. Wheelchairs and adaptive technology – Neversay“wheelchair-bound”or“confinedtoawheelchair.”Peopleuse mobilityoradaptiveequipmentastoolsofgreaterindependence.
8. Presume competence –Neverassumethatapersonwholooksorspeaksdifferentlyhasacognitivedisability.
Thepreferred“peoplefirstlanguage”recognizesthatsomeoneisapersonfirst,andthatthedisabilityisapartof,butnotthewholeperson.However,somepeoplewithdisabilitiesrejectuseofpeoplefirstlanguage. Theseguidelineshavedevelopedindependentlywithindistinctdisabilitycommunities,andtheymaysometimesappearcontradictory. Forexample, some persons with reduced vision find the term“visually-impaired” acceptable, but some persons withreducedhearingfindtheterm“hearing-impaired”offensiveandprefer“hardofhearing.”
Talking About Disability
WORDS & PHRASES TO AVOID PREFERRED ALTERNATIVES
adisabledperson
thehandicappedorthecrippled
normal,healthyorable-bodiedperson/people
wheelchair-boundorconfinedtoawheelchair
birthdefectoraffliction
avictimofcerebralpalsy(orothercondition)
suffersfrompolio,afflictedwithpolioorpost-polios
mentallyretarded,aretardsloworspecial
theDown’spersonorMongoloid
theepilepticorepilepticsfitsorepilepticfits
thementallyillcrazy,psycho,nuts,mentalcase
theblindorblindasabat
hearing-impaireddeaf-mute,deafanddumb
personwithadisability
personwithadisability
peoplewithoutdisabilitiestypicalperson
awheelchairuserusesawheelchair
congenitaldisabilityorbirthanomaly
hascerebralpalsyhas(insertcondition)
hashadpolio,experiencedpoliohasadisabilityduetopolio
personwithanintellectualordevelopmentaldisability
personwithDownSyndrome
personwithepilepsypersonwithaseizuredisorderseizureorepilepticepisode
peoplewhohavementalillnesspersonwithamentaloremotionaldisorder
peoplewhoareblindorvisuallyimpaired
personwhoishardofhearingtheDeaf,apersonwhoisdeaf
TheCoalitionisanallianceoforganizationsandindividualswhohavejoinedtopromotethefulland
equalparticipationofmen,womenandchildrenwithdisabilitiesinallaspectsoflife.Weworktogetherto
advocateforpublicpolicythatensuresself-determination,independence,empowerment,andinclusion
forpeoplewithdisabilitiesinareassuchasaccessibility,education,healthcare,housing,andvotingrights.
Organizational Membership–IfyourorganizationwouldliketojointheCoalition,thenpleasegiveusa
callatthephonenumberbeloworcontactourExecutiveDirectoratcoalition@tndisability.org
Individual Membership–IfyouwouldliketojointheCoalitionasa
memberofourDisabilityActionNetwork,pleasegiveusacallatthe
phonenumberbeloworcontactamemberofourPublicPolicyTeamat
About the Tennessee Disability Coalition
Tennessee Disability Coalition955WoodlandStreet•Nashville,TN37206
Phone:615.383.9442•Fax:615.383.1176•Ontheweb:www.tndisability.org
1. Personal Questions – Avoidaskingpersonalquestionsaboutsomeone’sdisability.Ifyoumust
ask,besensitiveandshowrespect.Donotprobeifthepersondeclinestodiscussit.
2. Patience – Itmaytakeextratimeforapersonwithadisabilitytodoorsaysomething.
3. Offering Assistance –Bepoliteandfriendlywhenofferingassistanceandwaituntilyour
offerisaccepted.Listenoraskforspecificinstructions.
4. Meetings & Events – Createanenvironmentthatiswelcomingtoeveryone.Anticipate
specificaccommodationsthatapersonwithadisabilityorgroupmightneedandcontact
themforinformationonhowtobestmeettheirneeds.
Common Courtesies for Engaging
People with Disabilities