Download - How Men Fall In Love And For How Long
How Men Fall In Love
And For How Long
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 2 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
This presentation is taken from The Origin of Emotions
which can be downloaded at: ww.theoriginofemotions.com
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 3 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
• men can only fall in love with a stranger
• men fall in love after 4 months of daily interaction
• men fall out of love 46 months after meeting a stranger
This presentation will make the following assertions:
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 4 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Men in love simultaneously feel three positive emotions
when they see or hear the woman they love.
the sight or sound of familiar people
the sight or sound of women
" The woman I love is happy."
trigger purposepositive emotion
encourage everyone to interact with kinaffection
encourage men to seek womenvisual/audible pleasure
encourage men to support womenmonogynistic love
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 5 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Men fall in love 4 months after meeting a woman and
fall out of love 42 months later or 46 months after meeting her.
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
monogynistic love
464
months since first meeting a woman
42 months
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 6 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
After 46 months, men continue to feel
the weaker emotions of visual/audible pleasure and affection.
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
monogynistic love
affection
visual/audible pleasure
464
months since first meeting a woman
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 7 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Men fall in love when one woman repeatedly triggers their
visual/audible pleasure and affection for 4 months.
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
monogynistic love
affection
visual/audible pleasure
464
months since first meeting a woman
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 8 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Visual/audible pleasure is triggered
by the sight or sound of women.
the sight or sound of familiar people
the sight or sound of women
" The woman I love is happy."
trigger purposepositive emotion
encourage everyone to interact with kinaffection
encourage men to seek womenvisual/audible pleasure
encourage men to support womenmonogynistic love
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 9 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Visual/audible pleasure is specifically triggered by features
that fertile, non-pregnant women have and other humans do not.
children men fertilenon-pregnant
women
fertilepregnantwomen
post-menopausal
women
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 10 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
The following are features
that fertile, non-pregnant women have and other humans do not.
narrow waist
non-grey hair
pubic hair
beardless face
feminine voice
8% shorter height
slender appendages
wide hips
plump lips
protruding breasts
hourglass figure
- beards evolved so men do not court men
- pitch and resonance midway between men and children
- 8% is ideal (about 5½" shorter than a 5'10" man)
- face, neck, arms, hands, fingers, legs, feet, toes
- ideal hip-to-waist ratio is 0.7
- combination of protruding breasts, wide hips, narrow waist
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 11 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
The more exclusive a feature is to fertile, non-pregnant women
the stronger the visual/audible pleasure it triggers in men.
very weak
beardless face
weak
moderate
strong
strength of effect children
fertile pregnantwomen
fertile non-pregnant
women
post-menopausal
womenmen
narrow waist
non-grey hair
pubic hair
feminine voice
8% shorter height
slender appendages
wide hips
plump lips
protruding breasts
hourglass figure
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 12 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
To fall in love, a man must feel
strong visual/audible pleasure for 4 months.
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
monogynistic love
affection
visual/audible pleasure
464
months since first meeting a woman
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 13 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Strong visual/audible pleasure can only be triggered by an hourglass figure,
which confirms that a woman is fertile and non-pregnant.
very weak
beardless face
weak
moderate
strong
strength of effect children
fertile pregnant women
fertile non-pregnant
women
post-menopausal
womenmen
narrow waist
non-grey hair
pubic hair
feminine voice
8% shorter height
slender appendages
wide hips
plump lips
protruding breasts
hourglass figure
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 14 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
4 months of strong visual pleasure confirms that a woman
was not impregnated by another man just before meeting.
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16 464
months since first meeting a woman
visual/audible pleasure triggered by non-pregnant woman
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
visual/audible pleasure triggered by woman impregnated
just before meeting a man as she loses her hourglass figure
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 15 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
The visual/audible pleasure that a woman triggers in a man declines over time
which encourages men to maximize the genetic diversity of their offspring.
this is a tangent
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
visual/audible pleasure
464
months since first meeting a woman
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 16 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Over 8 years, the visual audible pleasure that Elizabeth Hurley
triggered in Hugh Grant declined enough that . . .
this is a tangent
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
19951987
visual/audible pleasure
1988 1989 1990 19921991 19941993
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 17 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
. . . that Divine Brown, a street prostitute,
became relatively more attractive to Hugh.
this is a tangent
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
19951987
visual/audible pleasure
1988 1989 1990 19921991 19941993
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 18 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Women frequently change their appearance
to try to slow the decline of visual/audible pleasure.
this is a tangent
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
visual/audible pleasure
464
months since first meeting a woman
change appearance frequently
change appearance rarely
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 19 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Affection is triggered by
the sight or sound of familiar people.
the sight or sound of familiar people
the sight or sound of women
" The woman I love is happy."
trigger purposepositive emotion
encourage everyone to interact with kinaffection
encourage men to seek womenvisual/audible pleasure
encourage men to support womenmonogynistic love
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 20 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Affection is specifically triggered by features that
modern humans have and other primates do not.
arborealprimates
modernhumans
small-brainhumans
terrestrialprimates
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 21 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
The following are features
that modern humans have and other primates do not.
bums without tails
feet without opposable toes
- or dancingwalking bipedally
hands with long opposable thumbs
- everted lipseyebrows, white eyes, nose, philtra, lips, chin
- corners of mouth turned up, not showing teethsmiling
talking
- logically sequenced acoustics from human voicesinging, poetry, alliteration
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 22 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
moderate
weak
strong
strength of effect
small-brain humans
modern humans
terrestrial primates
arboreal primates
bums without tails
feet without opposable toes
walking bipedally
hands with long opposable thumbs
eyebrows, white eyes, nose, philtra, lips, chin
smiling
talking
singing, poetry, alliteration
The more exclusive a feature is to modern humans
the stronger the affection it triggers in others.
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 23 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
The affection a feature triggers is stronger
if there is proof of interaction.
• singing to music
• dancing to music
• making eye contact
this is a tangent
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 24 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
While seeing white eyes
triggers moderate affection . . .
this is a tangent
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 25 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
. . . making eye contact triggers stronger affection
because it confirms interaction.
this is a tangent
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 26 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Affection starts weak and grows stronger
the more time you spend with someone.
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 164
months since first meeting someone
affection(full-time interaction)
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
affection(part-time interaction)
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 27 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
To fall in love, a man must feel affection that
grows from weak-to-moderate strength in 4 months.
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
monogynistic love
affection
visual/audible pleasure
464
months since first meeting a woman
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 28 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Only strangers
can start at weak affection.
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
months since first meeting a woman
affection(old flames, family, friends)
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
affection(new women)
4
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 29 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Because men can only fall in love with strangers
they maximize the genetic diversity of their offspring.
child 6child 5child 4child 3child 2child 1woman
Mike only falls in love with strangers
Mike falls in love with one woman for life
MBBetty
MCCarol
ME
MAMA MA
Francis
Elaine
Dawn
Anne
Anne
MF
MD
MA
MAMAMA
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 30 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Strangers can only trigger moderate affection by month 4
if they are interacting on a full-time basis.
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
months since first meeting a woman
affection(part-time interaction)
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
affection(full-time interaction)
4
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 31 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Because men can only fall in love with women who interact on full-time basis
they do not fall in love with women who could have been simultaneously courting another man.
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
months since first meeting a woman
affection(part-time with man 1)
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
affection(part-time with man 2)
4
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 32 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Men fall out of love after 42 months
or 46 months after meeting a woman.
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
monogynistic love
affection
visual/audible pleasure
464
months since first meeting a woman
42 months
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 33 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Love encourages
men to support women.
the sight or sound of familiar people
the sight or sound of women
" The woman I love is happy."
trigger purposepositive emotion
encourage everyone to interact with kinaffection
encourage men to seek womenvisual/audible pleasure
encourage men to support womenmonogynistic love
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 34 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
By supporting women,
men indirectly support their children.
women men
monogynisticlove
maternallove
children
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 35 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Men maximize the number of two-parent children they have
by starting the next child when the current child no longer needs full-time care.
child 6child 5child 4child 3child 2child 1
MBBetty
MCCarol
ME
Francis
Elaine
Dawn
Anne
MF
MD
MA
child no longer needs full-time care
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 36 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Children no longer need full-time care when their
first set of teeth have fully erupted at 33 months.
• before their first set of teeth fully erupt, children need assistance to eat
• mothers must first breastfeed, then transfer of masticated food to their children
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 37 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Adding 9 months of gestation to 33 months of post-natal care
equals a total support time of 42 months.
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
monogynistic love
464
months since first meeting a woman
9 monthsgestation
33 monthspost-natal support
42 months
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 38 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
There is ample evidence that men
do not love one woman forever.
• fireworks do not continue
• 50% of marriages end in divorce
• affection keeps the other 50% together
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 39 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Based on 2002 US Census Data,
the average length of first marriages is 44 months.
womenmen
44 monthsaverage length of marriage
3.7 yearsaverage length of marriage
3.73.6average length of marriage
25.326.9average age at first marriage
29.030.5average age at first divorce
Men In Love 19-Aug-09 40 copyright © Mark Devon 2009
Assuming 16 months of courtship and 44 months of marriage,
couples typically divorce 14 months after the man falls out of love.
strong
weak
very strong
moderate
2420 28 32 36 40 44 4812 52 56 600 8 16
monogynistic love
464
months since first meeting a woman
16 monthsof courtship
44 monthsof marriage
14 monthsto divorce