' , , '

. t . l : , ̂ : :' : : :

:;Jig.

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&r/-4:',j

l. While navelling through New Brunswick. il'youpronounce & town's name correctly on thc lirsl !'v

WeSt.) tq r ' ' r t . .q 's ' " r" '4r l '

il-;ii{l r't*'':l'!'

-:'an':ilrt ett alwaYs carry an extra lh.ii

' .n j' '',

p"fiy,

ffi'$#

$ o u n rl.lYt i* d',q. I 2 -l'n e (t A b pg,l V^ u n ntl n fiiffiA t;uitte.1*,1r; Llirious, the lgnoranl and tlrc llse:enlb"4t't'Nttr,

ffi*l;tmf':ffiffi

'whin tle "Macerona'n

i',#$l-

ffifpur.i, ,*l

it ccsi $ai

la ha

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il. "

nu$gALtuAT LATTI

Hrru,aK'$STFffiSNi

tflYm

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{3 . . " tr tmlf,ttit aigfitmgro of frormr

"dr. l#b ah!! Dqmr

rs[ [*cC trt Id fryrt!*l* l*o fih*ry

Ontrr *fftut \

F-f €r- - - t - r - - lI rnrf,tr. ro*trxlrtt clr.r t{L t:l'l'* II .| ir*l rtr lr'. *s ?ttt tr x' Y' ti .l l*i rfth lr* rrrtr

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I mwg*i#d*s*qffii'%ffi ''lur iI o x *au ft.td. isd t*dltd'

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I e*t ' " . ' " """" !I . r*crr . . """"r""" ' " : """ ' "" ' II CrW I totr . . " ' . . r ' r " ' , d, t l r l | "

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r'rf

ferhaps fov tutQ. wandwirE hout axacflfi

fodertgl_,,*n"#! to,ft i fs*sngipqss.'.g"pe*niflv nafn qll fne <tailgf

T**f'gi't*'rdl t" e: Wfros€s ofF far q hckef. '

IIIIt

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*ffcr the ahcff,

ffiw'ff:$ffiA\ \Li.rrH, m

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I ss not Hhat t afli to y6tl.I an ast yc*r acguai*tanca, $ot ycur frisnd, noE yourgtr:"tr{Fnd.uon vanr ctcp.Bsaia, not youf, rodtgnggd, mot your aoul mate'I am-not y*ut sist{lr, nct ytlutr daughter. ndt your friend'scousln.lsot ynur colls*grue. nofr fgur e$$It}}r'e€,of tha nr{rrrthr n{tt y'aurrtla!:ager*aa*duty.r aa not rrour defi"nltlon of f,ur:damelrtal lruman ntturc'i * q"o iroble s.tnag*. not. Tahula Rasa. not zoon Polltikos, Fot

emanacioa cl fhe @e.I an nab dssel':n. whsts.trer tbe fuck f,ha! rneant.x etn nat thc tal l gir l , noh. thc short glr l , Dst thc fat gir l '

sstr *ht blosd qtrl, not ths red*head.i-*-1t"1 *v t"iea,e"r* grofii*r rurt my t{ygpncc b],og, not;ny a(Sl{'g*ra*{r iran@.;-;;;;;-;;;t $icrums of m* in vour online photo aLbum frorntbpt tlFi{! r*s all got realtydrusk and r r*or&: il**a.tggic b*t a$d-ilffi#;;#;-il-G-ili;; ffi tn* u"ut* o* mv eherve*, riottbe tlrpusando of, songs on#.,ped".ilots ose ry, maJ$r.; ; il

"i *tfoltu, sac mt cgFA, nat ny enrrancc scholar$hip

{lest, ar:Ytra?B} .;;;";d"il-1.1il*nret, xldt' qs lebters of *eswndsti"aili rx*trny r6s*nn6.t iln not^ rry vixgues"I an not ay rlcea, eibhar.flPt thc 6rlrr* r pqp. nss *$ *{l!lt* sf shqi.l*e'f $** {}rG Ffiaf,a €Btluc fu$tao *rt mY arl.r srn nst thq thins$ I don't" $ant ts Eatrk abeut.I an $ot ehe thinda 1 do wanl tb gaLk, not my intsbresr* attd

abscsaioma.;;;*il; beliefs or lach f,bcf,$of I

-t atF nst ttit*t I do, tr am*ot *hau tr say. nBd for the lsst tims'

In yaur anicle, you pasit a ss$dard of musical raste burd upon your ownconccption of what actually speaks to 1&u, whlle nlso holding thu you &re not arrcliti*t- lrnptich herc is that some rmrsic speaks to you and some do€s nol While pupsinr out that the lyrical conlcnt ii not the only stmdmd by *hiih to gnuge musieslquality, the elcnnent afthe sssnd is'givwr rhc b*cksrat Thc prabletn here is rhat"yolrsefm to bc scying th'm there is ane ffe$sagc to b€ hd in afly musicel work. In otlrer.wotde tfte arrist ryea.ks while you listcn. This lesve$ no mom for inhrpieutiorlwlrieh. for nrsny. coflditute$ rhs n$stimporrant festurs sf artistic wprv*siocr" In thpfirqi lines of Derrid*'s Pfaro'r Plwrnwcy, he writes the.following liner: "A tcxt isnot s tc)rt unless it hides from the first comer, from ttre first glurce, thc taw of.itseompusirion and th* fule$ of ttr garne A tckt reffsirt& rnoreover, forcverimperccpibla lts law nnd its rutts arc nol, hotrevsr, harbcred in rI* nce6sibiliry ofs se$el; il is simply rhot they con nevcr be bookcd" in thcpre$ert into onytling thatpould rigarrously be $alled * pcrcrsion,"This conneption $f thc anwork hcld$ that$y cogagersont with a work is itsclf an act of Ercation on rhc part of the vieqer,listener" or readcr. "l}ar this is thc case is r*titlcd to by the vuried interprerarion* ofuny givcn work of art. The point is that in the absence of the arti$t, thc art rnust b€opcn m inrerprctation sinc.e absence necessirates ambiguity. lf one nnisl speaks toyour thcn that artist ir wondcrful lor yuu" but not frr weryone, To *ay that thelyrlcal eontcnt ofone song 'spr:aks' rcally nw*ns thut you rclue $ your conc$pliooof whar the $ong seys. For m*, dut song may m€sn something cntirely different, ornean na&ing at nll. {n *ny cose, your po*ition is inherently eliti*t insofcr as you aregiving pur own, higlrly personaliecd, reading of urt prinrncy owr proplc who do

' not $hars your musicnl tasrcs. That Indic rock docsntt sptnk to you is, ofcoursc; rjudgcmcnt of Hee important to you but not necessarily fo nnyone else, Art isnecenarily a wwstlly nnd feretonious aflxir, cbaracteriecd bJ grey r*fhsr thsnbl$ck {utd whitc. fu such, there is na 'pure exprcssion- i* any srn*c. Nor is there anyunequivwal comrnunietion of crrntion by which, to ground an unrnitigatednrcs$esc.

$incerety Yourq l

lffencn

'i

aawn ft. I an nsE $het l eat.tr ne nsL *hcra : aad$ ff&$. t tE4''n*e $ftsr's t !inr*:"

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fil

n a1* &ee, thsatampe lu nry pasePort.I a.rn'not, aiC-r aan't r ier lr es b€.

dI aF :not.I drh.

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dislance tbernselves froff their nist$ s$andsilavjan hdsrc bantls {rkitr}rtcre E{e}and xppro$ch sfinif,hin& *f n real soiurd thst is, fsr ali ioeeils s$d pryosts, wigue.They also n*al a coupla riffr linrn poisr)$ idss" tfiftrat*ver- I really like it but Irecognire th*t if you *ruld hc int$ lt" you alruady uoutd be" I fll$crdon"t $rffit towaste eolu.run spac* bwue the unJmly bdrernotti thut i$ FU€KgIl UPI Rsquircnre ta Inutl th*ir pr*is*s hr their {irst firl} lcngth hidden norld t.or ttrose of younho know already, I aln es*cssively lete on c,itling our thjs h8nd es ths grg**esl shjtto hit punli si*ce relhsed'c 'thr rhrpe of punl to cumfi' {thrt-s for you rurdelju}drCIpped" end it rs so godur that I un going to be as sparing as poxiible in mydercryic'n of tlre rsu$ic bmause you really slrorrld be di$€ot'r*ng ir for yrseliBesicelly, because it's bwn out for so long" t'w hnd the charc€ to rsrd a }ot ofrerriews already- and tlrsy ull go like thi*: lrack r on F-I-ll's lirst lp sonnJ* lihe bandy (*hitq mid-ninetitx, mid+enrpo, mid"ottiturle lanre hariileore rewvet be$d)cntrri*g tlris urmgS'burd* {xhitg umnru*rcinl prnt*"punh bsmel fram r}rc mid-seventjes *Sich have arough cralibility for me to lesrh offo|, Fucktheseffsiew(:rs. nJeKll) IIP Wentl al eternlty maiiing on cpic pml rccord that ct:lvrwnallv d*ryly ond critically ftut nel'er too'sotirically) into whst it r*cans to bercli6ious, $fule ihfi)wfugthe msntle of dull cerrernporory punk rock intu rlwnexllilckrng dffsds. Hffisth, il you iold either the acronplishui mtstrubatur* of ycror gened* to tatre this on thry would fuek it *p hmd (swry kwt], str I gucss it'yuurv&nl saflicthiry t6 b$ rlon{j righl, ysrJ Sottn gire it to a punk. Also,4mn wamerhate* pr* and tre said hd e{ui $tan{t it, so lirkkirg buy thie nlbunr"

* * " "*"*"

t r€tnefilber **lso T.$as fucking delirioru cm fricrdthip a*d

ffitu& Ard firsr,rB $,orilis8y w ;.ti t'si.*;it"* ** YSf f *H,T

ffiffi.Iiffi ffidtrd fr ';i tq'", ye,*l"fo n*r m**n tms:ns"Y* " $1 duuililffi ;##"oil';G;;;"r#s.'--d,ltryq**:lt'-*Y^T:*:,-*.

ffiHffiffii*h.ffi;;l# rhsrn btood tp or{orhavonrecordc" }lavt'c

ili*i"Gillt* reeord t've hesnl frorn this b*q" $t* mlit withno*hriem rtnn*trcnre (*ee SM#S) d*Lt &* rrhn* r**e' $n ihis mcord. th$y

ffitffi# "zuffi,ffiruru yly: *ns no posnins. Nathin6wuc r*sdd" A*orcse$tce s*vil;* ***to* tu t"*3.1t grA *tnq atont the epposte

ffi#;,-;sffi;i *. G* "*tdn\ tet us" \{e tord esch other and ss \r{}

dl kuehed. All thc time' # d"l*t;-* **re' "lherc rvas no csclusion ond no

{iekio* *chml end no ryddil Ii# ffi ry ""* y wrm livins whnr *enld be

om bcst memories utren;;,*-iai-g &e desperere essn of a lifa that we railed

sfshd tun $re p*lar of reffiiiliry-fr* t*,;"qd f,vuvdav wnn climhing

ffiil *stJtts r*" k ffi;iiff to ryuq l^think tlu* wus the $ummsr ele

;ffiil'dffitr" n* -Ti"J

th- fu tir* tt*t u'e nl*uv* srwncd t*be

il#&;rldh$ *a*rt n** *iitbt "*- i.*qnnqesble Mv bigsest r$sret

i* ftiuki*s {hat I'll $".*;;;i* u i,S-{jl: g:1{l*ot It 'Aas sll swimmins

;ffiffiffi"-ttt t r--* qr* *i-ruon*l{wre ir's urye}y mlereble,.*hould bc

*orrF&"X * .*.i*us teg{; ; rhc fme af nny.hnud irrwlued rr rcwlutisnil;# "#

i*-*f ioro i'*ftitty ha' $cfftl borl 'vitlun a r*lsase bec4use the

ffiffi ib*6;,h* *fr"g* #t-*A * togt. The sot$&l htrdcore slbtm is preltY

iffiffi; t --il

l**;d G;il* ;i lt" fstv t'snds or the rra *$ *yS;ilfr;'bilt;&-;; lfe ftw btd brdnr or" rnsrs ulvcs$stclv' poiroa ldm'poiisryr idss is ne erffir**f ilifi1; hrffi* r,o hardcc're- SHJi XSyjlY"y-

"fim;HT-ffi"til*'ileffirl"i"tffi"lii* moy ctrn-t *dirt *s fuck o't of the

vretffliks s surfacs ro ,**ft-ilililoiii "*eu nut nf righteoo* pis$cd offguitur

;ei ffi;,;fiid ;tr t*-;; ,**ru* tu*iox urnn r poisan idea Pis churnpion rs

hsnld$ tu#tr ore of CIe mssi *"qonrt*tq *ff"ckinti miq.nai S'"*tT: :l1|t^..-iffi ffifi;tgil mJ of &e relqises stler ttp *tsconl eollectors anl grst*nilous

#ffiril; # @i* *v tu'te i r y"" tY" gry:$:**:';'il 1ff ll'i $'-

+pn

Se*suse tr ll*d trts unmenu+ penpls re$iund tr me in pqwn rugildirrS gsttfursnr*rrapes of, lrr strxight-up benowing nrcord* I'vr mentianed" fm donry it more.Plcasc do rr*rt hesit{tc to take an rntere$t und wuil *ound"mind if you don"t knownnE, becsuse this is whsf music is fw. AnyumS thc therns js tbur r*x+nds tlrat ue

ffik.xnn**lr

ilifrffi;;fiilihip Tstl ls{Ir friondx vnH lsv{i th'!{n"Mf \ \W"ffih''i ' l

ffiifrffi*"rt lp{ plm '*ctsber flle': drc hreww. is s pretty deccnt hand fion

t ;'ffi;d;i*id;&* h-'dd.p,Y*-*fl : ll':g:n,E3n*'T .**,t trffi&Tfillitffi #il d;thdri*rry n'-t*i*e **'**' r*tluw*p lB'oerab*r: Sle, relead tfn foffoffingtober A"*iiitty" the fust l4 ewk$ oo this *lbunl

t ;tdffi; s; &G#ire'."ttd fu*king suck,crcssor*ffi :l5r "

l9-du*unrcn1#tl & mahdy s/t {bor} lor frss$elo} rhesc, rwo V*siuja51tuns,ry mtt! dre$ticoily cha*gsd hcw t think and what I fsei sn atUrrm *outiue htnirg mewitrr" Emotiorialty ailc ildil/;hrd;sru;ti

botclr'we sru rbe mo,str$; "?l:yll{,U""*ffiffi ffi.rt|11$l,:H:q r,irm.,tl*1.*#iilHu*o u,*,,,,*n1)ft,ier:r- mr6"'*"t* i;[ff;X.{*'-"o

l€l lhrr$no*^-.. --.-

"'-1q nt*r "**r ty ;ffi#:.T lt$.iril I iant ca tuhl' as rur

::: Ty rhdv d{, rxrw, a,x,r mfi',ffi#mJ ffi*

,,1

l ocatbrn Un-tcenw Fodcourt Cml€tofi Ulfvctsitv

nimip rntlng: I *,'t ffitt od;"** rsii* as ttrcv don't acrually

*arrgtrt&tr **'.*o*#Hffiffiffi-#'lffi'

j l

ffiftr* ffi# il;r-'$ffi:-'d gl|,cmntasirc ***'sh. s* .ffi; ffiqttt ;bt";#'il;'"-*d' k ehcruld come as no xrpisc sn

@*mHffiffie duwarmapraccs is rhardrev'rsofte* mrry o*ff"tde P-"tF workinslhsrc oftsh havea

ffijffi;ffi*hffi s"- ii'i -"li"v ryir fout*t rhtv r€6lly

ffiffi;Til il $il;id;i*'*-.d'p*v*r. 'Irrcx cwldnt sivetcen of a *rit about

"rt*iit *

"" yt.r ryl"t y31rr mst' mii if I voe

mm*#'*' '1

For Srosc sfto havcbesfi followingebn$" you Yrs prshbly

ffi#m bnY*vworric

w|miilhcUn}ecntrefoodCourtt[crn,t*gncmbcrth. ffia rff it o.*t't mrscr ssyuap)

iE"* sllmrner,'' Fsel Youngcrx;lth f;rim - $hoPe . . . or no cosf

ftst&. t3-20 fiill gmbrellns protruding liorn your haif. Though thi*ilsry seem entertaining at the linre, especially in a public forunlthqe is a fair chaace that some ns'er do well widr a camcra willxnap a photo. This photo lras a 670lo chance of the pholo ending upon a rainbow-basted-pride web site wlth the tagline " two wnstedg*ys in margaritaville.'" That is nnt something you and your Dadshould have tws live dowLNtluer enrr wear rna{ching }lgweiian shirts ss it cgnfibttes to tlrelikely hs6d ofS$occurringhy 41o/a percent!Keep your apparel diverse ssd dislinct betweeil gcntrstiom. Thisis nrnre of p considerafion for your dad than an ironcladrule(though sn ironelad rule,regarding npprrul will be *rrph*sixeilshortly) as it will tnsure ysur father tremcndou5 opportunity forchattin' up the ladies. * Oh you're here with your mostly'maturedscn? Wow, I love a man with nearly cornpleted obligationsl abilityto keep babiss alivc! here's my number!" This will add heaps toystilirdfldts self-*;:nnfidsnqe an$ c,CIqiel#roef, Thiri in.e*prcially rru*if yoru Dad hr.r cver bren divorced .Ms*e sure y$u dnnk a loast t$ your Grandpa at sotlE paint in thenibht this will makc your father nostalgic and proud! Your Dadr*y e*ren get *Misty" wlrie h if he lilcc nld Jaza $tandards is A-Ohl

xtt ot ttlAu|tful, TRtlt{ ffuscul'tfi €t'PP0sT

the p*iq of hn*it*Clffil,{bon} ihe fr$at}awns of

,s$$f,

got 8. #b*qxq *u {brth entl *nj*Ylll I

)

)

*;

l

tsthe $ldMa*. R.c,

.$et of

"American Pie"', or "tsarrctt's Privateer's", "

dne of you ac{uallY knoriry all or

the srme chorus over and with ou theproper.hfa fi+tdqarsY wiltW+ ;-t*; i; u*t*Lil*itt lead to a conplcte desth of the mon$nt snd

nndup$nrS maY Drrvent future atlrlnpts at the beloved art of balledeering '

',-*oti.ir. pettins drunk srith vour Dad is a truly unique$|d @q!*snn r*tiJr,, gatting drunk srith your Dad is a 9V-u11fue$

indJXfe if "

ysung . *ke catching a football,It-b-**;l '

nt*a$ro offvour frcc; gening drunk with your dad tlrapes andltr*n's develoomsng\S*sh mllestone's wrurant a dignified plnc*q*ryybur newnrbsqrij $o* for, the easy to follow guirielims rhat bnr-s been?trere'sra 3?Yn

torryards fte Srst ilidjdr h* arc-Tf*Il $ inY:-*:1Y;i1tr*. Thowb of liG. norv" fur those who've Yct toin nrind {hdt with ttm guy rvho used to tot{lly I

tT t* ,4+ wonrMlRlsus$ F0ft

YOU.N0W,".#wLt$;$*, I HtCtr S l^a"l FAII It]..P|r$fi{ arxt }t{}t* if*- Gl

'Stlhr

f#Hffi #*?I',$Sbf, #+h#u tE&T,til!

i'l-

i\i'Liill\\- $iM

lg deePer tq Carl-eloil

universitfiuautioom cu ltuie ali .nav " .Yl'i tl,S:".|i$:g :l:. . -. ;;'y ilriid.;,,6t*GtTfysh the,snakins.haltwSvS-li9-P*$ ll'-lq". " ' slgintic sauna+ife *nt*l sttq* hall to 3pPI1,:-1",fffY'::l:

ilrfi-;i"rinitio" *enture that tends to manifest itself in. many

"# &;,'d;ffi il*uo" acventurersl -t* J3n*j:Yffi;;; #lrt un6douiro*, and snours agke. Membership in tfiese;;;t;lil u* **p*t*ly anonvmous, ard participals Tay. Tt&r t** cne ancther even if .qF t*o were to meet and shaKehands. ms $B klng oi 6$o{iatlon seem pu;2tingt The casual

oU**t may think so, but the urinary.adventurer*ll.l::::::#;ft;;itnarns, ;ith" social dynamics of publk washrooms andthe relatlanshiPs af

ffitHtrf#$,$Tffifrtr;ffi,ffi"ffi#|*, ffii.?*t Jr*'* rory-Buitdins be3rs purt':Yl*ffi';';iilffiil. iuu* lrtiu clalrn on.!he. ract that tlre..ou{-1ttar{ually hsen eruraved' inb mf *n4glt 311lry-m"ffXy*Hm

Yet, important question* rarnaln, such a$ what is a Jerk-Off

r;';rdu. witrr* ii'rti" written in pncil, pen' or rnarker are quicl{v'

&ffi- b^l'c.**rons-iriig--t cyimoial-yrf' the rutt- $"t llltl*i.iilpr- h.t-n*n rncoi$ratg In!o. the structure of the sba{l'

Indicatss it ls a funCa'rilnftai-p"* oi tne €xp*'*ence of those wlro

;#ffit ildr- -t

li r[ iignin*ne to rtm mernbers is thereforecreater than partidpa#;;fi# i*e-rmanent JaS-0ff f"ounts' This

ftffi;# ffiffi'ils" dr* irn, ang a Sarticipant can €xpect:th€ Cognt to ne tneri-dci time tre enters' *s wetl' orre o$*q

'gshrmm stall, Thls parflgular engmdn$ $ltstd$.spr harenty-srate enrents of self-pleasurc. yet, the Count aS meaninaa simple record-book; it defines a mmmunig througfr

parsdpation. Those who have mntributed unAerrt*nJid; oili,il;wtro"@ nat ordlnarily use the stalt will sfurnblq upan the Count andirntigtiaee4, thlnk of all tfre @ple who have previousty ma$u*ated',n -n* mr. questnn;; ;o;rr il;;i;;il{;r,;t,l,';#"dffi;Sl?", and ewhat happened to thelr semen?" may ftastr in ttreir minds.Tll.ptrol.may then fegldisgust and choose nor ro revislt the stattagaln. rn thls resped, it k similar bo an anlmal marking ib terrttory.with sre reaction cf the non-participant ln mlnd, if is therefoieironrylptid whether *re rfiq{Trber$ have actilsily mosturbated ln*re stall. Perhaps they have, or pertrap tll*V cfairn tfr*v AU t" *3_r**P * Jeyqslglqsgjlglg$ry* glsgslgf vi ns rema i ns.

'l-

the #e$sst squimel t have Cier yen'L* me tell you ahoul me grenrsst b'qr$rrvr L r*vw v:*" :,ir".'

*--

I don't say ihat lightiv' NowJ.have Y:,YTy, ffin"ffiU;t*l-'*J"- *r'"e.l.hsve' eu11 t*'t stress thisenougfi th* g'*ut*SuiryLliev:l'1:x31*-tiff Y

*

ffiffi"-T ,**il rclgin, sffl'ss the street *om.

*. -"#ff.lls1}$;,*yr i:}3t ***ffiu*" *illflff :,ffi;; id'k-y, uri.' b*b{ tr ry-i:I

baek*n '$2, a bright $pst on a re.latfveiy ugly team" . -Anyways, Rickey (ths Squirrel) comes into view from'1*y iofto probebLy'&nm Coopcr, and takes s,ffi and I mem.ls*#xo;fl amoss Slgtn, He gets to the divider without nny trouble,mavne because he wq$ moving &st*r than ligbt" 3n ftet, it wssso en$y it drnost $eern$ to piss him off He sgnds there perchedon the divid*r, ,.*airing. FIe wait$ not fcr * break in $re cars, butfor the cars himsclf. He then bolts out in funt of a Cavalier,gets juit past the front tsft tileo s$sms to Inug$. spite om$front right tire of a Saturn and then shaots bctrrueen the frontaild bmsk tire* befb're seeming tojlmp rigbt in frorrt of a lats'80's Chevy, where he pauses, pause$, and thep contirrum topause, r'rltif &sih li.ss mrilt'ed beyond immlnent" and then he Ijfres. U*aybe not nctually flying" but he sesms to set about threidiffwrt long jump records to get to the sidewdh thtm thc bsq

_ff *,$p. thcri halfiray up a uee' $rmbitch didn't even sY*t. I$o maybe it doesn't menn much. Maybe it isn't crsal

Th$ glor{ousiitihing'l've ever

@.1

l lot ct$clify one te use {r^

.riavins sccn rnd'ana':::::"[X'ji,?-1l$:rTil*.*::J:[Til"j;'p*noa' i*'bullwhiP ar Panies If one tct

froi.tii!*r;n't' Maclnto

,,$f iirils sro llrrr kingx nl'tlw f$rs$t- thtt* bqsrs or* rhx b*lligtrcnt '**ri*ilil

h{$eixlts

lrv lo prcvcnt falltng" R c N{aclnto

"l*$ing d*rvrr iP *,11191 Y: o , * r I

. -ffi:ffi::i :' ilfr :?: i :i"{i.*?q:rtim?::ix :r":l1ll:n;t j*i;::{l ;?ffi;.ri,:5":i:[ir;i: :: -ff : : :**i:l " i ; *:n i l r" ::i:-x?i ".ruh:1.-." i

ffii Hi I i# *li tr3l:$-,l;:; i,hff **x*i,1*n:i Hixihxi; ;:;lhtl*:+.rXl.i:::*:'H1- "., ;$mt?il.:,'m:: ii: ; :*? th. j:ijil* * r tli *n ":*#ril$ lmll "'l.h::.i; :t :;; : :4:ld:?i ii:l ih "r li#il' iH:ilff i;.:ilF::Jr"::1*i 'pF Hiii *l"ili"";:*:' ?: ?ffi T": ::::' :im*:ffi?-: ::''

inrPres s i einab t e; ;" ; ;" 5 have a numlcerir

" i : , . t r

':f r*aef *hutt s rfirrg raileifYrlsc. . . . Maybe I will fi'l.rt inyage rr,frat I was loo*lng !,rin junk and veed and c*Lr,Y*Se nrny be the frral f.r."_Willinm Lec, Jrrn&le.

$bs4i nrrne*r erbllgixrg

tnes* hum,h,l w #*rtrentj &c

Mr. I tngry Reader, Hcq"

filled lt:atEs traddr{.onally foehered a prop*r

-

understanding of, cJ.ass, a srout conarituci l ; ; _;f f irtoi"r, k*pt. hh* !-6urk ch*r*ing in silence anA Jir tir;

-"---

sBreet. your unholy phi losophy of ldlenees and rebelLionl:" To:l-""rrainly inapired a wideepread eearch r" i f fr"-uocrcl Lltetr - insofar es the r$o*d [,i.fea inrolvex

I?:T:i ! .r .he srreera ar nighb, knneking down watchmen,

s{acKen}ng Elgn po6t,s, svert.urninE constables, breakinqlrrflqords, and drawing eworde l"n tavern and pJ"ayhoueeal ike- Though you aie eminent ly quui i r iud ro,protessorship in the f ie ld of UBly ( indeed. ler ne beche. f i rer. Ls suggesr trhar you un**rr" ," i ; id-;*; ; ; ;*"ts lead Lhat. deparrment) piovoking such civi i disorder::*: , : :" . : t9

f t ieuse of your academic l icenae. r urgeHophrns Univer$1Ly, for ths sake of rheir repugut i , rn, Lobr*ng }{}{tr tef$l undsr revtekr.

- . . Theregore, SIR, I am duty b.c i rnd in hhe name of

l . l l l r ,y: . Xing, and Counrry ro br ing an agiraror of your

exEraordinsry inf luencei ta Juet ice. thu" I qrve th i8noce to you. becaus€.you are an i l l_bred pufpy, as my

:::::1^f:: saciefacbion.

. lf you sum$an *i,u.l lq.ri.*J':luraSe rc. a{:cepr, we ghal}" !ns€*} msun*edr et dar*u Jnf::::: ?1*I

* fr:runishr hence. where r ehatr reach you a*{}saofi rn marul€r-s r*ith pi sto1 and rapier-point af ite, I f1.1:" ?*lld fait b,a drl rn* rhis prsasui:e, dt;;.-;;'"il";lyltifiy ae an ingrnr*ara cox*nrnb, *"u"*ll*i,il.*:r"*-And digeurbef 6f hhs nas*A r . - ,*-L !L^- \ , - - . i -

QBRSL,

id-f z!;**,1it'"#X*x*;ai:;.

f*u** $crtortcr'., F- rF F

rSirectcd by K*vin Wrighl.

Iff"iffi; * ?;3opm, $hriw bcsin* st,1;ryry'Ft* itii"--,i-n* will bs accept*d at the dsor'

ilru* nu*n* Un*sr tlrs thin prefeirt*xr*Uc{1i11-tirqrs cxir'ts e $tatd t:f

b*ins ror*pl*rctrv dien * t'l'li-illti' *;:X,:-:*:m11iiffiH;|t-$srng somp*swrv itr lsr' * ffiffisJ;u*o tltr, I thssxrti*.esptwntion" *

fffi$J:t;1*l? :?#Jffi;; ti'lt woittffi ar'ectcd bv

The $swer: The sewer is a politically inspired piece of abstract thestre' A

mcdcrn t$k€ ffl Abrundism, the srory is sh,$ut trro politicians u'ho e*ntrol

ths wsrld eomfnrtsbly fixim rhe pipes and drains of a server. writlen and

m"aHfl#ffie * r!_

*-eoql* Confcrsnee Rn'om. l?4 t*eds Residences t* ** lffi

- ww"r w*d ;; *'*-*1 n'"i35*,iffiJ.iillliliili-*

FnxdtY br*ugfrt l- g::-:t&;;il'*' - *' *Y-i;n;['it{' Fu*kin's sYTfffr;;ro-nn s,ricu featuring local taicnt'relsiedto $rondwa} tnl-*'''.* .**.*M

't