DYNAMIC LEADERSHIP

NATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF EDUCATIONAL OFFICE PROFESSIONALS 1841 SOUTH EISENHOWER COURT WICHITA, KS 67277-2619 www.naeop.org

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PREFACE

The National Association of Educational Office Professionals (NAEOP) has prepared this publication to promote and encourage professionalism in the workplace and the association of all educational office professionals.

Copyright © 1986

National Association of Educational

Office Professionals

Revised editions: 1986, 1994, 2007, 2013, 2014

All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book, or portions thereof in any form except for inclusion of brief quotations in a review, without written permission from the publisher. Every attempt has been made to credit the sources of copyrighted material used in the book. If any such acknowledgement has been inadvertently discredited, receipt of such information would be appreciated.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

CHAPTER 1: DO YOU WANT TO BE A LEADER? 4

What is Leadership? 4 Can Anyone be a Leader? 5 Why are Leaders So Important? 5 At What Level is Leadership Most Important? 5 What Qualities Must a Leader Have? 6 Do I Really Want to be a Leader? 7 Is a Leader’s Reward Worth the Effort? 7 CHAPTER 2: A GOOD DISCUSSION LEADER 9

What are the Duties of the Discussion Leader? 9 CHAPTER 3: THE GAVEL IS YOURS 11

Suggestions for Dynamic Leadership 11 The Room 12 Care of the Speaker 12 Leadership 12 Nine Attributes of Leadership 13 Leadership Traits 13 Leaders Who Fail 14 Additional Responsibilities of Group Leader or Chairman 14 “The Chair” 16 “Desiderata” 17 CHAPTER 3: GOAL SETTING GUIDELINES 18

Sequence of Successful Goal Setting 19 Motivation 19 Motivation to Your Full Potential 20 Effective Decisions 22 The Responsibility Belongs to Me 23 “I Am Responsible” 24 “Keys to Success—You” 24 “Be the Best of Whatever You Are” 27 CHAPTER 4: DAILY AFFIRMATION 28

I Was Born to be Great 28 Planning Helps You Reach Your Goals 28

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CHAPTER 1

DO YOU WANT TO BE A LEADER?

What is a leader? Perhaps the best way to start answering the question is to try to define

what a leader does. A leader exercises leadership.

“A leader is best when people barely know that he exists, not so good

when people obey and acclaim him, worst when they despise him. Fail

to honor people, they fail to honor you. But of a good leader, who talks

little, when his work is done, his aims fulfilled, they will all say: We did

this ourselves.“

~ Lao Tzu

So a more fundamental question is:

What is Leadership?

A very simple definition of leadership is: The capacity of one person to cause a group of persons

voluntarily to contribute their efforts toward a common goal.

A leader is an individual who understands herself or himself, the association, the interests,

attitudes, goals, values, philosophy, and problems of the association.

Effective leadership depends upon

effective interpersonal relations

and sensitivity to the good in those

with whom you work. You must

also be motivated to lead, be

capable of making the best

possible use of the talents, skills of

your officers and your

membership—in other words, the

human resources of your

association.

Your primary challenge is to

discharge your duties,

responsibilities in such an efficient,

effective manner that others accept your leadership and want to work with you.

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Can Anyone be a Leader?

Some believe leadership is a natural gift that some people are born with and others are

not. According to this theory, no one can learn to be a leader unless born with the

natural ability to be one. Others believe that one of normal intelligence can learn to

become a leader in the same way that one learns to solve other problems.

It is not necessary to decide which of these two theories can be proven in practice.

Actually, there is evidence that both theories have some validity. Some people seem to

have a greater natural ability to lead than others, but those with less natural ability can

learn how to make the best use of whatever leadership ability they have. Study and

practice can improve leadership skills just as study and practice can improve one’s

administrative skills.

Mastering the techniques is only part of the story! Once the basic rules are learned, the

individual’s personal qualities determine how well the rules are applied. It is these

personal qualities that take a person from merely a passable leader, to a truly

outstanding one. Two persons may have about the same natural gifts for leadership,

but one of them will make better use of leadership opportunities. Sometimes it even

seems as though one creates one’s own opportunities; but what is more likely is that he

or she is ready to make the best of the opportunities when they arise.

Thus the answer to the question “Can anyone be a leader?” seems to be “Yes.”

Anyone, that is, who is willing to study and practice to make full use of natural talents

can become an effective leader.

Why are Leaders so Important?

Any organized group activity – association or otherwise – must have leaders. To

succeed in its purposes, the group’s individual members must be able to look to

someone for guidance and direction of their efforts. This is true of political groups

from the smallest town council to the complex agencies and bureaus of national

government. It is true of businesses from the smallest family-owned shop to the giant

nationwide corporations. Without leaders, none of these groups could function

effectively.

At What Level is Leadership Most Important?

The president of a national association might seem to be more important than the

leader of a state or local association. The national president leads a much larger

number; is responsible for many more members; and has broader objectives. Success

or failure will have a much greater impact on the outcome of an objective. But is she or

he really more important than the state or local leader of an association?

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National, state, and local associations are linked by a chain of affiliation. The strength of

the chain depends equally on each of its links. Remember the old saying about a chain

being only as strong as its weakest link? If one link breaks, the chain has failed to that

extent. If your national association is to succeed in its role of upgrading the status of

the educational office employee, all the links in its chain of affiliation must be strong.

In this sense, the leaders at all levels are equally important. A weakness at any level

will be felt at all levels above and below it. Good leaders are, therefore, essential at

every level.

If there were a surplus of outstanding leaders at the national level but a shortage of

outstanding leaders at the state or local levels, we would not have a viable national

association. Nor would the situation be any better if the local and state levels were

crowded with fine leaders while national posts were held by poor leaders. To have a

viable national association, we must have good leaders at every link in the chain of

affiliation.

What Qualities Must a Leader Have?

A method of deciding what qualities an association leader must have is to ask the

people affected by this leadership – the membership. Members know what kind of

leader they prefer, need and what qualities they want their leaders to possess. When

members have been asked what kind of leader they want, their answers have been

remarkably consistent. Again and again, they have emphasized the following qualities.

Competence When members say they want their leader to be competent, they mean

several things. In general, they want their leader to be well- trained in

the technical requirements of the job. They also want their leader to

know a great deal about the skills and requirements needed by the

members. Both kinds of competence are necessary for a leader to be

capable of teaching, helping members and to earn the confidence and

respect of the members.

Unselfishness This includes such qualities as the leader’s loyalty to the membership;

serious and sincere concern for their welfare as educational office

professionals and as persons, confidence and trust in their ability to

perform their duties as members of the association.

Decisiveness A leader’s decisions usually relate to the association’s objectives and the

means of attaining them. When members have confidence in their

leader, they will tolerate an occasional decision that turns out badly – if

they believe it was made in good faith and not as a result of

incompetence or neglect of their best interest. A leader who waivers

back and forth between possible alternatives cannot inspire the kind of

confidence essential to effective leadership of an association.

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A leader who waivers back and forth between possible alternatives

cannot inspire the kind of confidence essential to effective leadership of

an association.

Common Sense While the term “common sense” is less precise than the other qualities

we have been considering, it has meanings that are widely understood. A

person with common sense is one who exercises good judgment in any

situation, who is tactful rather than rude, and who doesn’t become rattled

under pressure. Few things are more damaging to a leader’s effectiveness

than a reputation – deserved or not – that they lack common sense.

Do I Really Want to be a Leader?

This question can only be answered by each individual. Only they can know their inner

feelings and motives. Only then can they honestly answer such related questions as: Do

I enjoy assuming new and more demanding responsibilities? Am I willing to give the

time and effort necessary to qualify me for higher leadership positions? Do I seek

leadership only for the prestige and fringe benefits, or do I really want to be more useful

and valuable to education, my association, and my fellow educational office

professionals? The National Association of Educational Office Professionals is

constantly helping people make this important decision about them. It provides many

opportunities to demonstrate potential leadership through chairmanship of, or

membership on, national committees; through representation as a delegate at the

Advisory Council; and through specialized workshops offered at conferences.

Is a Leader’s Reward Worth the Effort?

Sometimes people seek leadership positions under the impression that leaders don’t have

difficult jobs. The leader’s job almost always seems easier than your own. Of course the

very opposite is true, as any leader will readily verify. They will tell you that each time

they have advanced to the next step on the leadership ladder, their duties have become

more complicated, their responsibilities more demanding, and their work more arduous

and time-consuming.

If this is true, why would anyone ever decide that they want to be a leader? More

prestige and privileges are nice, but few leaders believe

they are enough to compensate for the burdens and challenges that accompany greater

responsibilities. There must be other, more important motives for seeking the leadership

“road.”

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The best leaders will tell you that the great responsibilities are in themselves the single

best reward of being a leader. What they mean is that there is a unique kind of

personal satisfaction in tackling and mastering a tough job, especially when that job is

to direct and lead a group of people, whether it is a local, state, or national

association, toward a goal that is important to them, to the association, and to

education.

Good leaders are convinced that rewards of leadership more than offset the worries,

the hard decisions, the setbacks, and the disappointments that all leaders experience

along with their successful accomplishments.

People who have the innate talent for leadership but fail to develop and apply this

talent are cheating themselves and their fellow educational office professionals. They

deprive themselves of the rich tangible and intangible rewards of leadership and

withhold from their association their most valuable assets.

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CHAPTER 2

A GOOD DISCUSSION LEADER

A good leader shows no partiality either for a particular point of view or for any of the

members of the group. Although he or she does not allow inaccurate information or

unsubstantiated opinion to go unchallenged, a good leader seeks to draw a challenge

from other members of the group. To be effective, facts must be sifted from opinion.

The leader’s job is to stimulate others to think, express themselves and to pull together

the contributions made by the members. As skills increase, the discussion leader tends

more and more to remain in the background while the participants share the limelight.

What are the Duties of the Discussion Leader?

To set the stage for the discussion.

To help the group get acquainted.

To introduce the topic or to outline the goals or purposes of the group.

To start, stimulate, and keep the discussion on the subject.

To clarify and define conflicting issues and opinions.

To coordinate and integrate the discussion by proper use of questions and transi-

tional summaries.

To draw out the “timid soul” and keep the dominant person from monopolizing

the discussion.

To summarize the whole discussion by pointing out the conclusions reached or the

progress made.

Preparation must be distinguished from expertness. The leader needs a general

knowledge of the subject and should be familiar with available source material and dis-

cussion aids. The role of the leader is that of the member who raises some question on

the basis of a preliminary study of the topic. It is not that of the expert who answers

the questions.

Discussion, by its very nature, is an informal process. Formality and stiffness stifle free

expression. A social and personal atmosphere before the meeting actually starts helps

set the stage in a mental sense.

The purpose of the introduction is to state the topic, define the areas for discussion,

and relate them to the interest of the group.

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Questions of one kind or another are the most frequently used method of starting the

discussion. Opening questions are more successful when they call for opinions rather

than facts. Nearly everyone has an opinion; not so many have facts. How and why

questions that ask for reasons or causes and questions that begin with “do you think”

are more likely to evoke a response. The opening questions should not be too broad

or general.

A traffic officer role of keeping the discussion

going requires the leader to keep one or a few

participants from “hogging the show.” She or he

must also curb interruptions of one member by

another, side conversations, more than one

person speaking at the same time and a heavy

dictatorial touch that act as a wet blanket to

discussion. Proper timing, judgment, and tact

come with practice.

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CHAPTER 3

THE GAVEL IS YOURS

You have reached the point of no return and the moment of decision by accepting the

gavel, your symbol of authority, with great pride and even greater humility.

Your association has bestowed upon you the highest honor it has to offer — the role

of leadership.

Suggestions for Dynamic Leadership

1. Planning

List what is going to happen; outline the purpose of the meeting.

Check every detail before you start the meeting. Is . . .

AV equipment ready?

Sound system functional?

Presentation compatible with the equipment provided (check the

presentation to make sure it works in the laptop, etc.)?

The heating system, ventilation, and lights satisfactory?

The seating capacity adequate?

The seating arrangement conducive to promoting the goals of your

meeting?

2. Promotion

Email or mail your notices on time. A system of two notices assures

better attendance.

A telephone or email committee is a good way to stimulate attendance. A

short personal note often works wonders.

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The Room

Select a quiet and pleasant room for the meeting.

Arrange seating so the door is behind the audience.

Provide a platform for the speaker.

Get the best chairs available.

Keep the chairs far enough apart to accommodate everyone.

Give the listeners a place to put their coats.

Know where the light switch is if the speaker wants the room darkened.

Know the voltage and current available when using electrical aids.

Care of the Speaker

Make certain speakers have transportation to the meeting place, know the location

and time of the meeting.

Give speakers information about their audience. Are they mostly women? What

are they interested in? What will they expect from the speaker?

Be sure your speakers know how long they are to talk.

Leadership

You are the chairman.

Tell the group something about the speaker in your own words. Don’t give a

lengthy introduction.

Don’t sit behind the speaker and soak up the speaker’s spotlight.

Don’t leave the meeting room after you introduce the speaker. If you don’t want

to hear what the speaker says, how can you expect your group to be interested?

Don’t call out other people or start a conference while the speaker is giving his/her

message. Avoid giving the impression you are not listening.

Be ready to help the speaker with visual aids.

Don’t ask for questions without at least having one or two planted in your group.

Repeat the questions when they are asked.

Don’t argue with the speaker over comments made.

Graciously thank the speaker.

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Nine Attributes of Leadership

The following nine basic attributes to good business leadership are adapted from an

article by L.V. Fort, market training counselor, in an issue of the Dartnell Office Admin-

istration Service. They are:

1. Ability to gain the confidence of subordinates, colleagues, and superiors.

2. Ability to persevere until the leader’s goal is attained.

3. Ability to sell the leader’s goal to others in terms which they will not only under-

stand but will enthusiastically support.

4. Willingness to listen to and adopt the ideas of others, no matter what the leader’s

status on the company totem pole.

5. Ability to get the leader’s thinking across to others without being misunderstood

and without offending.

6. Genuine interest in people.

7. Ability to understand the reactions of people and appreciate “how they got that

way.”

8. Not letting the opinions of others persuade the leader to act unwisely.

9. Forthrightness – for the leader knows it is fatal to keep people wondering where

he or she stands.

Leadership Traits

There are ten traits exhibited by successful leaders in almost every field, according to

Dr. Whitt N. Schultz, a career consultant and motivational expert.

1. They observe with application. They observe and absorb. They look at everything

like it’s the first and last time they’ll ever see it.

2. They know how to listen – really listen! Listening is wanting to hear.

3. They take copious notes. They capture ideas as their senses alertly respond to re-

act to them.

4. They welcome ideas. They urge others to bring their best thinking on a subject.

They’re open, responsive, sensitive, aware, and encouraging.

5. They value time highly. They use it skillfully.

6. They set regular goals. They expend their energies toward solving ways to reach

those goals.

7. They try to understand first. Then, and only then, do they judge.

8. They always anticipate achievement and build on their strength.

Continued on next page.

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Leadership Traits, Continued

9. They know how to ask clear, courteous, and incisive questions. Questions are the

creative acts of intelligence.

10. They know how to organize their approach to challenges and how to immediately

focus their total mind power on the relevant.

Leaders Who Fail

1. They find it easier to do it themselves than to find ways of letting others help.

2. They forget to praise.

3. They don’t have time to read the “helps” sent to them.

4. They don’t have time for adequate preparation such as their agendas.

5. They are too occupied with last-minute tasks to make each member feel welcome

and needed.

6. They permit the association to go from meeting to meeting with no plan for the

year.

7. They arrange too few activities in which all may share.

8. They lose contact with their committee chairmen and their work.

9. They do not provide leadership or train chairmen or new leaders

for the future.

Additional Responsibilities of Group Leader or Chairman

1. Start the meeting on time.

2. Take sufficient time at the first session for people to get

acquainted.

3. Do your best to make everyone in the group get a “feeling of belonging” to the

group instead of feeling like an outsider.

4. Help establish a climate or working situation conducive to active participation of all

members of the group. Suggest, guide, and lead so all will feel free to take part.

5. Introduce the topic or topics to the group simply, clearly, and without bias. As you

do this, do not express any of your own opinions.

6. Try your best not to lose the interest of your group by prolonging unnecessarily the

discussion or belaboring a given point.

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7. Do what you can to encourage every person to express his or her ideas.

Recognize good points as they are brought out in discussions.

8. Keep discussions on track. If the discussion lags or gets off the topic, stop

occasionally for a pause with the announcement: “Perhaps we should stop just a

minute for us to find out where we are,” “What has been said that we want to

record,” and “What should our next steps be?”

9. Keep participants on track with intelligent, analytical, and clarifying questions.

10. Conflicts frequently arise in group discussions. Many of these can be avoided or

limited if the discussions are carried on in concrete, understandable terms.

Conflicts usually occur because of:

11. A lack of understanding of the meaning of a statement or idea expressed by a

person.

12. Some faulty reasoning.

13. A difference in values.

14. The desire of a person to save face when his/her own stand is proven unpopular.

15. A “know-it-all” attitude.

16. Emotional upset or instability in the face of an issue or issues directly affecting the

individual, etc.

17. Contribute to the discussion when you have something relevant to say. Make

your contribution and “let the ball be passed.”

18. Pay close attention to what is being said and do not take a stand before you know

the facts. Perhaps the ball can be passed by stating that “_____ has expressed

these ideas.” Then invite comments or discussion by others.

19. In concluding the meeting, end on a

note of interest (perhaps with a

good summary or with a

compliment to the group, if such is

deserved). In this way you can

reawaken the interest of the group

and end the meeting on a positive

note.

20. If there is to be a follow-up meeting

of the group, try to clarify the next

steps or actions indicated by the

group decisions before the meeting

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The Chair

A poem written by Mrs. Floyd Brizendine

I’d like to take a moment at the closing of the year

To comment on a subject that to you may not be clear on.

The question is more complex than at first it may appear.

Just why it is the presidents are also called “the chair.”

The one who thought that title up must surely be aware,

It doesn’t boost one’s ego to be likened to a chair.

It’s true it may be well-upholstered, over-stuffed, or bare,

But just between us – I don’t think that I look like a chair.

The problem really puzzled me, then finally grew clear,

A conscientious president must function like a chair.

Some chairs are only beautiful, they are delicate and rare.

The kind I refer to is the ordinary chair.

Can you imagine any object anywhere?

That is more downright useful than the ordinary chair?

A chair should never squeak, or sag, or anyway complain

But just go on functioning no matter what the strain.

A chair must be efficient and equal to the task

Of sometimes being “sat upon” by some well-meaning lass.

A chair should be dependable and always well aware

It’s awfully hard to sit upon a chair that isn’t there.

A chair should not seek privileges that it does not deserve

But should remember at all times – “it’s only there to serve.”

The proper chair will not collapse when burdened with a care

Just stand upon its sturdy feet and calmly bear its share.

At least there comes the moment when with worn and weary face,

The chair must tactfully take off – and find a corner place.

It needn’t seek retirement in corners dark with gloom –

Just clear a place for fresher chairs that come to grace the room,

I hope I’ve served you well and never let you down,

For surely I’m the luckiest of all the chairs in town.

You’ve sat on me most gently throughout the months of use;

I honestly can testify I’ve never known abuse.

I’ll cherish every spot on me that you have given wear

And so I close these thoughts to you with much love, “The Chair.”

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DESIDERATA

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without

surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of the time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither is cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born in fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy.

Found in Old St. Paul’s Church Baltimore, MD, dated 1692

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CHAPTER 4

GOAL SETTING GUIDELINES

Someone once said any road is a good one if you don’t know where you’re going.

But to get where you want to go, you need to know the route. It has to be like a road

map. The starting point must be identified, the check points pinpointed, the time it

takes to get there calculated, the money to be spent for the journey borrowed or

taken from savings, and various other things.

It is as much combining the decision-making rules as the problem-solving guidelines.

Whichever you select, you come up with a system that applies specifically to you.

What do you want to do in terms of improving your own behavior? Would you like

more tolerance with the children or to be less defensive when your supervisor asks

you to stay to work on a special project on your bowling night? Would you like to be

more attentive at committee meetings or be less self-conscious when speaking

before groups?

Whatever the goal about behavior, be certain that you are treating the objective and

not the symptom. If you have no patience with your children, it may be because you

are bothered by something inside you, not with them. Examine it. See what really

needs attention.

Want to make a more tangible goal? Something in the area of saving for a trip to

Europe in three years…or buying a second home or car...or going back to school

and getting the degree that has been so elusive...or getting that new assignment when

“What’s His/Her Name” retires next fall...

Write out the goals or changes you want to achieve.

Is it realistic?

Is it challenging?

Can you surpass it? Will it stretch you?

Can others help? Who? How? Will they? What if they don’t? Who else figures in?

What about cost? Can you borrow the money? Earn it and be patient? How will you

know when you achieve the goal? What conditions will exist? Can you reassure

yourself that new goals will be set when goals are achieved?

The only thing standing in the way of your success is a poorly defined goal and lack

of commitment on your part. Make as many goals as you see. Put them in proper

priority. Which ones do you want the most and which can be reached quickest?

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Sequence of Successful Goal Setting

If you want to manage your time better, the first step is to ask yourself this

question: “Exactly what are my goals?” Do you know what you want? Define

your goals only after you have made an objective study of your abilities,

aptitudes, and interests.

2. Visualize in detail exactly what you want. Set realistic goals you can attain with

a little challenge to yourself. Make your short-term and long-term goals.

3. Have a great desire. Make up your mind you are willing to endure the pain of

struggle for the comfort, reward and the glory that you want to achieve.

4. Write out your plans to obtain your objectives. Set goals for your personal life,

for your job, for your professional growth.

5. Take the necessary steps to accomplish your plans. Set goals for different time

periods: Six months, one year, two years, five years, and retirement years.

6. Know the educational requirements of a job. If you do not meet them, find

ways to acquire those requirements.

7. Have the right mental attitude, also the faith and confidence to know that you

have the ability to accomplish your goals. Recognize the training afforded by

leadership roles in an organization. Visualize yourself in the joy you want and

the role you want.

8. Make the quality of your work, your dependability, and your relationships with

your peers and supervisors fit your goal. Analyze your goals. Are they the

goals you really want and are you willing to work for them? Will these goals

work for your organization?

9. Accomplish, complete, make yourself promotable and enjoy your goals.

Motivation

The book I Ain’t Much Baby-But I’m All I’ve Got, by Jess Lair, has these ideas about

motivation for those who “need people because I need the love they can give me.”

The major part of life is acceptance of others and yourself.

When I accept myself as I am, I change, and when I accept others as they

are, they change.

All of the research we have on occupations indicates that, while you need to

know a lot, the best predictions we can make on your success will have to

do with your basic attitudes toward people and things and the world around

you.

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It is crucial you see that you have always been controlling the behavior of

the people around you by the way you controlled your own behavior.

We all need to understand that each of us was uniquely created…and our

beauty lies in our uniqueness…and not in trying to be something we aren’t.

We need to make peace with our past, so we can walk away free.

I fight self-awareness the way I do, because I have to take a good hard

look at some of these sad things that are me.

Expect the best out of yourself. To do that, you have to accept yourself as

halfway decent.

The more you trust your associates, the more you believe in them…and

yet they are the same people. It’s just a difference in what you expect of

them.

I’m firmly convinced it isn’t easy to love and be loved at first but it gets

easier.

Self-acceptance is so hard to get, you can’t do it a day at a time. I’ve found

I need to run my life five minutes at a time.

The more real I am, the more real people there are around me. So being

real helps us have richer, deeper relationships with the people around us.

In guiding your own learning and in speaking of your feelings, your

confidence is crucial to you…only you can be the captain of your ship.

I think there is only one reason to do something. That’s because you love

to do it.

How long a life is, is of little consequence. What counts is what we do with

the days we have.

Motivation – To Your Full Potential

Ask yourself – “What do I really want to achieve, do, own, become?”

Put your plans on paper. Spell out goals and ways to reach them. When

you determine your own personal goals and business goals, arrange your

goals in the order of their importance. You may be surprised to find

certain things you put down will not remain on your list after you have

finished mulling it over and revising it. Every plan must be in writing.

Written plans are powerful. They direct you toward your goal. A distant

goal is the strong medium that keeps enthusiasm strong and ready for the

climb.

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Ask yourself – “Do I have a real burning desire?”

Know your values and your priorities. Be specific. The advice you give yourself

must be such that you can put it into practice. Seek information that is relevant.

Break down the job into small enough pieces so you have no excuse for not

starting it. Center on individual needs and resources: focus on the resources in the

world around you and the alternatives to which you can or want to commit

yourself.

Ask yourself – “What are the obstacles?”

Establish checkpoints so you can evaluate your progress. Examine how these

checkpoints feel. Remind yourself of benefits you expect from completion of the

job. Develop a contingency plan in case your first choice doesn’t work out. Avoid

temptation by deliberately avoiding circumstances or thoughts that might sidetrack

you. Recognize your limitations. Don’t set goals you don’t expect to reach. Be

willing to take the risk and don’t be afraid to try new methods. Set deadlines and

hold yourself to them.

Ask yourself – “What are the rewards?” and “Is it worth it?”

Make an honest distinction between “I can’t” and “I don’t want to.” Realize that

important decisions require commitment and some continuity over time.

Improve yourself-persuasion ability. Learn to know when you are reasoning and

when you are rationalizing. Promise yourself rewards; small rewards for small

accomplishment, big rewards for big accomplishments. Use the stimulation

provided by good news to do extra work. Recognize conflicts and make a choice.

Give yourself the right to make mistakes. No one is perfect.

Seeking relevant information is important. Get all the data you can about the situation,

the circumstances, and the possibilities. If you try to decide and something isn’t clear,

wait until you get more information and then repeat the process. Open yourself up to

gathering information in those areas you may never have considered before. In the

process you are enlarging your knowledge and perhaps finding relevant factors that will

strongly influence your decision.

But at some point you have to stop and make your decision. Realizing your decision

can be changed or modified. If you make the “wrong” decision you don’t have to stick

with it at any cost but you do have to be committed to it long enough to test it

thoroughly. If you believe in something and you have your heart into your goals, it is

worth it.

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Effective Decisions

1. A DECISION is always a choice between alternatives (one alternative is to do

NOTHING). Dissenting opinions often disclose creative solutions which were

not thought of in the beginning.

2. A manager’s decision is often an instinctive first reaction to something that is

bothering the manager. If a person tests this reaction against some dissenting

opinions, a logical solution (rather than an instinctive one) can be developed.

3. Decisions are often made on the basis of WHO is right, rather than WHAT is

right. When a manager encourages dissent, you can be sure the personality of the

dissenter does not affect the final decision.

4. No manager is completely without prejudice. Your own opinions often reflect

your prejudice, but because of your position your arguments carry much weight.

Honest dissent can overcome this.

6. Many decisions are the RIGHT solutions to the WRONG problems. Dissent

often uncovers the fact that we have defined the problem incorrectly.

7. An effective decision is often a COMPROMISE between strongly opposed

points of view. In order to make the best compromise–one which will work in

the long run–we must let all sides make their strongest possible case.

8. Those who argue for FACTS rather than OPINIONS often forget facts can

usually be found to support any preconceived opinions.

9. A good leader takes advantage of the EXPERIENCE of the staff and of the

associates in making decisions. These people often have opinions based on their

experience, but lack immediate facts to back them up.

10. By gathering all these PRO and CON opinions, the leader can decide what

FACTS are needed to make the best choice of alternatives in the final decision.

A happy woman is one who has no cares at all;

A cheerful woman is one who has cares but

doesn’t let them get her down.

— Beverly Sills

23

The Responsibility Belongs to Me

To release my potential from past restrictive programming of my subconscious, it is

extremely important that I give myself the right to be me and to function as I

choose. It is not possible to have sound self-esteem if I am not true to myself or give

up responsibility and accountability for my own life as I seek to achieve fulfillment

of my needs and goals.

I want to allow myself the freedom to choose without building a prison for myself

with “have to,” “cannot,” and “they won’t let me.”

I recognize I am functioning from my own free choice, and I can either recognize

myself as important, valuable, and interesting as a person or see myself as an

absolute incompetent, who is unworthy and unneeded. I can choose to be kind,

loving, helpful, loyal, and compassionate, or to be lazy, cowardly, mean, and disloyal.

I can choose to be happy, free and succeed in each undertaking or to fail and feel

unimportant and less than others.

If I allow myself this freedom, I must recognize I am responsible for my decisions

and actions and be willing to accept the consequences they bring. I know I am the

one who will answer for my every action, and will profit or suffer accordingly.

Therefore, before every important decision, I ask myself: What ought to be done for

me? Will it injure me or others? Is this in accord with my beliefs and goals? It is in

alignment with reality as I see it? Am I willing to fully accept the consequences?

24

I AM RESPONSIBLE

To release my potential from past restrictive programming of my subconscious, it is

extremely important that I give myself the right to be me and to function as I

choose. It is not possible to have sound self-esteem if I am not true to myself or give

up responsibility and accountability for my own life as I seek to achieve fulfillment

of my needs and goals.

I want to allow myself the freedom to choose without building a prison for myself

with “have to’s,” “cannot’s,” and “they won’t let me’s.”

I recognize I am functioning from my own free choice, and I can either recognize

myself as important, valuable, and interesting as a person or see myself as an

absolute incompetent, who is unworthy and unneeded. I can choose to be kind,

loving, helpful, loyal, and compassionate, or to be lazy, cowardly, mean, and disloyal.

I can choose to be happy, free and succeed in each undertaking or to fail and feel

unimportant and less than others.

If I allow myself this freedom, I must recognize I am responsible for my decisions

and actions and be willing to accept the consequences they bring. I know I am the

one who will answer for my every action, and will profit or suffer accordingly.

Therefore, before every important decision, I ask myself: What ought to be done for

me? Will it injure me or others? Is this in accord with my beliefs and goals? It is in

alignment with reality as I see it? Am I willing to fully accept the consequences?

To be truly free and to grow in self-esteem, I must not give up my growth, pursuit of

fulfillment, or happiness to anyone.

I choose to treat myself with dignity and proceed to move toward full love, wisdom,

freedom, and joy, knowing I am the authority over me. —- Pacific Institute, Inc.

KEYS TO SUCCESS – YOU

Your success depends upon you.

Your happiness depends upon you.

You have to steer your own course.

You have to shape your own fortune.

You have to educate yourself.

You have to do your own thinking

You have to live with your own conscience.

Your mind is yours and can be used only by you. ...continued on next page

25

Keys to Success, Continued:

You come into the world alone.

You go to the grave alone.

You are alone with your inner thoughts during the journey between.

You must make your own decisions.

You must abide by the consequences of your acts.

“I cannot make you well unless you make yourself well,” an eminent doctor often

tells his patients.

You alone can regulate your habits and make or unmake your health.

You alone can assimilate things mental and things material.

Said a Brooklyn preacher, offering his parishioners communion on

Sunday: “I cannot give you the blessings and the benefits of his holy

feast. You must appropriate them for yourselves. The banquet is

spread, help yourself freely. You may be invited to a feast where the

table is laden with the choicest foods, but unless you partake of the

foods, unless you appropriate and assimilate them; they can do you no

good. So it is with this holy feast. You must appropriate its blessings. I

cannot infuse them into you.”

You have to do your own assimilation all through life.

You may be taught by a teacher, but you have to imbibe the knowledge. He cannot

transfuse it into your brain.

You alone can control your mind cells and your brain cells.

You may have spread before you the wisdom of the ages, but unless you

assimilate it you derive no benefit from it; no one can force it into your cranium.

You alone can move your own legs.

You alone can use your own arms.

You alone can utilize your own hands.

You alone can control your own muscles

You must stand on your feet, physically and metaphorically.

You must take your own steps.

Your parents cannot enter into your skin, take control of your mental and physical

machinery, and make something of you.

26

Keys to Success, Continued:

You cannot fight your son’s battles; that he must do for himself.

You have to be captain of your own destiny.

You have to see through your own eyes.

You have to use your own ears.

You have to master your own faculties.

You have to solve your own problems.

You have to form your own ideals.

You have to create your own ideas.

You must choose your own speech.

You must govern your own tongue.

Your real life is your thoughts.

Your thoughts are of your own making.

Your character is your own handiwork.

You alone can select the materials that go into it.

You alone can reject what is not fit to go into it.

You are the creator of your own personality.

You can be disgraced by no man’s hand but your own.

You can be elevated and sustained by no man save yourself.

You have to write your own record.

You have to build your own monument or dig your own pit.

Which are you doing? B. C. Forbes

27

BE THE BEST OF WHATEVER YOU ARE!

If you can’t be a pine on the top of the hill,

Be a shrub in the vale but be

The best little scrub by the side of the rill;

Be a bush if you can’t be a tree.

If you can’t be a bush, be a bit of the grass,

Some highway happier make;

If you can’t be a Muskie, then just be a bass

But the liveliest bass in the lake.

We can’t all be captains; we’ve got to be crew

There’s something for all of us here,

There’s big work to do, and there’s lesser to do

And the task we must do is near.

If you can’t be a highway, then just be a trail,

If you can’t be the sun, be a star;

It isn’t by size that you win or you fail

Be the best of whatever you are!

—- Douglas Malloch

“Let the world know you as you are, not as you

think you should be; because sooner or later, if

you are posing, you will forget the pose, and

then where are you?”

Fanny Brice

28

CHAPTER 5

DAILY AFFIRMATION

I Was Born to be Great!

I will gain a positive attitude.

I will gain a renewal of confidence.

I will gain a new enthusiasm never experienced before!

I will look to my assets instead of my liabilities.

I will look to my potential instead of my problems!

I will become more alert to potential and possibilities!

I will enter every day without giving way to the possibility of defeat or failure.

I will become a better listener and not prejudge others.

I will develop a more creative imagination.

I will look to ways things can be done instead of looking for reasons why things

can’t be done.

Planning Helps You Reach Your Goals

Apply the principles of Management by Objectives (MBO) to your own life. If you

follow this advice, you will be in a very select group. Less than one percent of the

population has written a plan for personal success. Many people are reluctant to write

down a formal plan because they fear failure. They think, “If I state my goals, others

will know if I fail to reach them.” That is not necessarily so. If you don’t want others

to know your goals, don’t tell them. The important thing is that you know what you

are trying to accomplish. Drifting aimlessly seldom leads to success in any field.

So far as career is concerned, not having a plan leaves you in an uncertain state.

Career counselors agree, people who set specific goals achieve better results than

those who don’t. Organizing your thoughts in writing a plan will prepare you to take

the next step. That might be registering for a business course, asking your supervisor

to approve your attendance at a special seminar, volunteering to assume an extra

responsibility at work, or reading a book on office politics. Writing down definite

goals tends to encourage people to actually do the things they know they should

instead of putting them off indefinitely.

A written plan isn’t a straitjacket. It won’t keep you from discovering shortcuts or

changing your mind and taking advantage of interesting opportunities that present

themselves. It will, however, free you from the confusion of trying to pursue too

many goals at once. A plan will focus your attention on one small step at a time.

—- The Office Professional