editors unleashed no cover

7/31/2019 Editors Unleashed No Cover

1/45

Editors Unleashed

Magazine Editors Growl About

Their Writer Peeves

By Linda Formichelli


2/45

Introduction

This book will do one of two things: It will give you a good laugh and an ego boost as

you read about the writer who insulted the magazine while pitching the editor and

chuckle to yourself, "Iwould never do that." Or it will make you turn red as a stop sign

when you recognize that you're one of the writers who mix up it's and its or disappear

right before deadline or neglect to send source lists and backup materials with their

articles.

We got the juiciest stories and details by promising our editor sources anonymity, but rest

assured that these are all assigning editors, and most of them work for newsstand

magazines whose names are instantly recognizable to every writer. Other editors here

assign articles for very respectable, paying trade magazines.

The tips at the end of each section will help you avoid becoming an editor's nightmare.

Read, enjoy, laughand learn.

Linda


3/45

Chapter 1

The Editor: Editor at a parenting magazine.

The Peeve: Diva writers who chafe at revisions.

What's your biggest grammar/style peeve and why?

Its, it's, there, their, they're, etc. It's inexcusable to make a mistake when it comes to that.

Style doesn't bother me so much, except ages spelled out. Ages are always numerals.

That's just journalism 101.

Can you share a writer horror story?

When I called a writer to tell her one of her sources didn't check out so she'd have to find

a new one, she told me it was probably because I'd changed the words around so much in

my edit. When I promptly forwarded her the copy she'd turned in to me, bolding the part

that didn't check out because I hadn't touched a word of it, shestillwas defensive. Just

say I'm sorry. I haven't worked with her since and will never call her again.

What's your biggest contract negotiation peeve and why?

I hate negotiating money. That's my problem, though!

I would never hire a writer who...

...says in her pitch, "I think this story is great for [name of similarly titled magazine]

because ..." I always feel like responding, "That's our competition, moron," but usually

refrain.


4/45

There are so many ways to display a lack of professionalism; which one ticks you off

the most?

Not showing me respect because I'm not a senior editor.

What's the one worst thing a magazine writer can dosomething that's totally

unforgivable in your book?

Plagiarize. Unbelievably, it happens.

What's your biggest query peeve and why?

Not communicating to me your understanding of our magazine. Pick up a few copies and

read what we do before you send me an e-mail. And don't try to fake it. I'll respect you

even less if you do that.

If you meet writers in your office or at conventions, do you have any DOs and DON'Ts

to share?

One writer actually brought me swag one timea chapstick with her name stuck on it.

Super weird. Don't do that.

How do you react when a writer commits one of your peeves?

If I'm slightly annoyed, I'll probably drop it. If I'm majorly annoyed or insulted, I'll put

that writer on my NEVER CALL HER AGAIN list.

Just to add some balance: Can you share a dream writer story?

Someone who can whip out fresh, interesting copy in no time flat. I have a go-to writer

who's pleasant on the phone, very smart, gets what we do (she reads us inside-out every


5/45

month), and always comes up with great ideas. When you turn something in that your

editor isn't going to have to work on very much, you'll make her day. And she will call

you again.

If you could tell writers just one thing they should NOT do, what would it be?

Don't pitch without really getting to know the magazine. Makes you look really, really

stupid.

Is there anything else you'd like to tell aspiring and professional writers?

Don't be lazy. When you slop something together, we can tell. And is pisses us off. And

we bitch to our editor friends about you.

Writer is to editor as...

...already-gleaming wood is to polish. (We should really just help your solid story shine.)

But that analogy isn't perfect, because I also believe we're here to guideto give a writer

an even better sense of our publication/what we're looking for so we can help her story be

everything it can be.


6/45

Peeve-Less Pointers

Don't be a diva. When an editor asks for changes or wants you to back up a piece of

information you used, and the request is reasonablefor example, she doesn't ask you

to add 800 words and find three new sources by 5 pm with no extra paydo it with a

smile. Okay, you don't really have to smile, but at least pretend to smile.

Know your market. True, in The Renegade Writer, Diana Burrell and I give ways to

pitch magazines without reading them...but that tactic is to be reserved for times when

you truly can't get your hands on a copy. Read the magazine and tailor your pitch to its

tone and topics.

Double-check your queries. Once I sent my pitch to the wrong magazine, but thankfully

the editor was nice about it. Not all editors are so forgiving, though, so double-check

that you have the name of the magazine and the editor's name correct.


7/45

Chapter 2

The Editor: Assigning editor at a national, large-circulation general

interest magazine.

The Peeve: Writers who change the story mid-assignment.


I don't think I should have to tell a writer twice not to double-space after periods. I told a

writer once, and the first time he did it I went through the copy and removed all the extra

spaces; it took me a while, but it was fine. I sent him a note saying to put only one space

after periods, but the next time and the time after that he did it again. Why? I don't want

to spend 10 minutes going through a story taking out the double spaces.

It's about attention to detail. I don't know why some writers feel like they're in an ethereal

existence where it's all about the art. It's about the other things too.


A lot of writers we have the most problems with have the best credentialsthey're the

ones who drop the national magazine names. They say, "I've been in Vanity Fair, Time,

Newsweek, blah, blah, blah." But they have some of the worst habits.

I had one that had basically every national sports magazine title to drop, and awards that

sounded incredibly impressive. The fundamental story we assigned was a profile of the

fitness and nutrition regimen of an older top-name athlete. We discussed the idea

thoroughly, and this athlete was not easy to get.

The writer turned in what was a passable sort of mini-profile of the athlete. There were

only one or two paragraphs in the whole 1,000 words that dealt with his fitness and


8/45

nutritional regimen. I know a lot of assigning editors tend to do this passive-aggressive

thing, but not meI just said, "I hope you have 700 more words worth of content in your

notebook on the topic we assigned." That wasn't the case, and it just didn't work out.

What can a writer do to assure you'll never hire him again?

The main thing that stops a writer from being used a second time is that the writer just

didn't get it.

We always say to read the magazine; this gives you a certain sense of the style, tone,

substance, and presentation. But to really get the DNA of a magazine, you really have to

write for it and go through the editorial process. I don't expect a writer to turn in

something that completely matches the tone, style, and so on exactly as we discussed the

first, second, or even the third time. Still, there are some writers who just don't get the

fundamentals of the assignment. They have an idea in their head and say, "This is what

the realstory is about." But we're the gatekeepers here.

It's okay to argue your point in the initial assignment conversation; I don't take it

personally. You can fight for your angle, but at the end of the conversation, we're going

to have an understanding, and I'll even send an e-mail to summarize. When the story is

turned in, it needs to be at least 70 percent there. I can't look at it and say, "This isso not

resembling what we discussed."

Our magazine will take a topic everyone knows about and give it some kind of twist. So

we'll say, for example, "Find three of the weirdest Civil War reenactments." Then the

writer comes back with a first person story of what it's like to do a Civil War

reenactment. You have to think, "What is going through this writer's head?" These

assignments are not hard...they're just thought out in a different way. I don't know why

this keeps coming up, but it happens all the time.


9/45


10/45

If you meet writers at conventions, do you have any DOs and DON'Ts to share?

Don't take it personally if an editor says an idea is not right for him. If you have five

minutes with an editor, why are you wasting valuable time asking why your idea doesn't

work? Read the magazine and you'll find out why. But for now, just pitch more ideas.

The idea you thought was the worst may be the best one for us. Remember, you're there

to make money, not get a pat on the back.

Do you have any additional tips for writers?

You wouldn't believe how many writers don't include a source list in their stories. Name,

phone number, and e-mailit's that simple. I don't need every dissertation and peer-

reviewed study ever written on the topic. And don't tell me that a fact came from the

American Heart Association website...I want the entire URL where that exact document

can be found. And you still need a source name of someone at the AHA who can verify

that the information on the site is still accurate.


11/45

Peeve-Less Pointers

Follow the assignment specs. You may think that this story would be better as an essay,

but if the editor asked for a Q&A with a local celeb, that's what you should turn in. The

editor has to get all the story ideas she assigns vetted by hereditors, so don't mess with

the assignment specs.

Mind the details. The magazine may use one space after periods, no serial commas,

states spelled out instead of abbreviated, or numerals instead of written-out numbers. If

the editor doesn't offer you a style guide, pick up a copy of the magazine and figure out

the magazine's preferences before writing your article.

Don't take it personally. If an editor rejects your idea, remember that It's Not About

You. It's about the ideaand it may not even be about that. It could be, for example,

that the idea is perfect but the editor already has another writer working on it. When an

editor sends you a rejection, think of it as an opportunity to send another ideaand to

send your original idea elsewhere.


12/45

Chapter 3

The Editor: Editor of a magazine for sports enthusiasts.

The Peeve: Writers who half-ass interviews.


Disregarding basic conventionsnot knowing how to use commas, etc. I don't care what

side of the serial comma debate you stand on, I'd just like you to know there is one.

Style: I get stuff written in a sort of pompous, grandiose style that I guess I'm supposed totake more seriously than a basic, matter of fact approach. I much prefer basic and matter

of fact.


A writer had trouble getting sources and didn't bother informing me until after the

deadline passed. Then she just said she couldn't write the piece, bye. I could have solved

the problem if she had let me know earlier that she was having difficulties getting people

to interview for the piece, but once the deadline had passed, it was a little late. I will

never work with that writer again.

Another writer would be asked to interview three or four people for a piece but then

never really put what they said in the article (he used his own opinion/experiencesfine,

but we weren't asking him to be the expert, we were asking him to interview the experts).

From talking to him, I had the vague sense that he would call people up, explain who he

was, ask one question and then hang up. In other words, no clue what basic reporting

means. How did this guy get to be a writer? Same as above: not someone I will work with

again.


13/45


Writers expecting me to read their minds. If the deadline won't work, ask if it can be

changed. If you think you're entitled to more money for this article as compared to

previous ones, tell me why.

If you don't like any clause in the contract, don't just stew about it, tell me. I can fix

almost any concern that a writer has but I have to know about it first. Don't just decide

I'm being unfair and resent me for it. I try hard to look out for my writers, but I'm not

going to be the one to suggest a raise in pay. I have a budget to consider. If the writer

brings it up, I'll do the best I can to make the numbers work.

The other thing that drives me nuts: people who have to spend several days thinking

before they accept/decline an assignment. We work on a tight schedule. I need to go on to

the next writer if the first one doesn't want the assignment. How hard is this? Do you

have time to do the piece by the deadline? Yes/No. Are you interested in doing the piece?

Yes/No. Is the pay offered acceptable? Yes/No. This is not rocket science. This is not a

book deal negotiation. It's probably eight hundred words with three sources supplied due

in three weeks. It's just not that hard to say yes or no.


...acted unprofessionally. Polite, persistentthat's fine. Demanding and stalkerish, your

e-mails go directly to the junk folder.


the most?

Writers who act like they're doing me a favor by writing for the magazine. I appreciate

good writers and try to use the same good writers over and over. But we're doing a

business transaction: I offer money, the writers supplies writing. I'm not grateful when


14/45

the writer holds up his end of the deal. That's just a basic expectation. I am grateful when

the writer goes above and beyond, but then those writers don't expect me to be grateful,

they're just happy to be of help.



I've had writers get facts wrong, I've had writers forget to give me source information for

fact-checking, I've had writers submit copy with multiple misspellingsbut none of

these things make me unwilling to work with the writer again ifthe writer is willing to fix

the problem, apologizes for it, and tries to do better next time. What is unforgivable is not

doing the bare basicsas in the writer who wouldn't even do basic reporting for a

pieceand then expecting to get another assignment. I don't think so.


I don't get many queries but the biggest problem is that people haven't read the magazine

and have no idea what we cover or how we cover it. You can't possibly know what we're

looking for unless you've seen the magazine. You'll impress me a lot more if you send an

introductory letter with clips, asking to see sample copies so you can hone your query

appropriately. I've given plenty of features to people who've never written for me before

just on the basis of how they handled getting to know the magazine.


If it's something fixablea source omission, an uninteresting ledeI ask the writer to fix

it and see how they respond. If it's something that has to do with one's whole attitude and

professionalism (i.e., can't be bothered to interview the sources) then you'll never get

another assignment from me.


15/45


I have a writer who provides story ideas when asked; doesn't beat me up if story ideas

aren't accepted by the editor-in-chief; accepts/declines (though hasn't declined yet) an

assignment in a reasonable period of time; notifies me of any assignment

concerns/contract questions at the time of the assignment; alerts me to potential problems

long before they bring production to a screeching halt; hunts down her own sources when

needed but understands the necessity of using provided sources as well; reliably (i.e. by

deadline) turns in well-written material that uses a friendly style that suits the magazine;

never needs editing; her stories get raves from the EIC and make me look like a genius; is

persistent about following up with everyone (me, the sources) without being a stalker;

always presents a friendly and professional attitude even when I know a situation is

probably making her nuts.


Assume that I can change the numbers in the budget just for them. If you're getting 35

cents a word, you might be able to talk me into 45 cents a word if I value your writing,

but there's just no way we're going to go from 35 cents a word to $2 a word. The budget

just isn't there, and it's never going to be there, and I can't change that. If the conditions of

the assignment and the pay are acceptable, fine; if not, you can negotiate but you need to

be realistic.


Always look at the assignment in full before deciding based on pay. I have writers who

earn less per word writing for me than for national consumer magazines but they actually

earn more on an hourly basis because there are far fewer hassles writing for us than for

other magazines. If my 800 word assignment for $400 takes five hours to do (sources are

provided, no endless rewriting or committee editing to deal with), that beats Cosmo's 400

word assignment at $2 a word that takes ten hours to do plus requires three rewrites and


16/45

reinterviewing four sources twice. And don't forget that you can outgrow a magazine and

leave it behind without creating hard feelings.


...pen is to paper. I've got nothing if I don't have good writers.

Peeve-Less Pointers

Ace your interviews. The lazy writer is one who asks sources three quick questions and

then hangs up, especially when the topic is complicated. Write down a list of questions

you need answered, but remember that the list isn't carved in stone: go the extra mile to

ask additional questions and follow up on new leads that come up in the conversation.

Keep it simple. Writers who try to sound important and smart often come off as boring,

stilted, and pompous. Read the magazines you're pitching to get a feel for their style;

most magazines prefer simple and direct. Don't use a big word when a small one will

do; use active verbs and short sentences; keep adjectives and adverbs to a minimum (let

strong nouns and verbs do the talking).

Stay in touch. If you're having problems with an assignmentfor example, if a key

source disses you or you get sick and can't make deadlinedon't go AWOL on

deadline day. Instead, tell your editor as soon as possible so she has time to help fix the

problem.


17/45

Chapter 4


The Peeve: Writers who write sloppy queries.


Misuse of apostrophes. I don't know why it bugs me so much, but it does. I also can't

stand it when writers use fancy psycho-babble language, thinking it makes them sound

smart. It really just makes them sound like they can't explain things to a lay audience.


Well, there was the one who made up quotes ("I couldn't talk to these people," she says,

"but this is what I was told they said.") and the one who turned in a story on an entirely

different topic than assigned, with no explanation until I asked what happened. ("The

original assignment turned out to be not very interesting, so I did this instead.") Oh, and

the one who missed three deadlines and never said sorry after I had to track her down

three separate times. Talk to me, people! I'm very forgiving, if you talk to me before you

go and do something crazy.


We don't negotiate our contract, so it's a little annoying when people send it in marked

up. I'd prefer to be called, so I can explain, as nicely as I can, that it is what it is.


...gets the name of the magazine wrong. You'd be surprised!


18/45


the most?

Sending casual e-mails (as in, one-liners with no salutation) before we've established a

working relationship. I may be nice, but that doesn't mean we're best friends.



Write a sloppy query. If you can't even put the effort into your pitch, there's no way I'm

going to trust you with an assignment. The number of pitches I get that have a stream-of-

conscious style kills me.


Telling me when I should get back to you. I'm busy! Also, telling me how soon a story

will be "ready." I don't know what writing book recommends this, but I can't stand it. It

seems amateurish to me, and if I give an assignment, I'll set the deadline and expect you

to meet it.


to share?

DO talk about your interests outside of writing. Yes, we should talk about the magazine,

your experience, your ideas, etc, but I meet a lot of writers. If I know something special

about you, I'll be more likely to remember you.

DON'T ask me how to become a contributing editor. First you need to write for me.


19/45


Mostly I get annoyed and figure the writer isn't worth working with. Worst case scenario:

I tell my colleagues about it and we all avoid the writer.


I work with a writer who started out a little rough (she was smart and pretty good, so it

was worth explaining what the magazine needs), but she really learned from the revision

notes I gave her. Not only did she do good revisions, but it was clear from her next

couple of pieces that she'd gone back and looked at what I'd said before. Her revision

notes are minimal now.


Try to convince me on a story when I've said no. Try another idea instead.


20/45

Peeve-Less Pointers

Be friendly. When you meet with an editor, don't bombard her with pitches and beg her

for work. Be prepared with some ideas in case the editor asks for them, but focus on the

editor instead of on your own needswhat does he do at the magazine, how long has

he been there, what is he looking for?

But nottoo friendly. Starting out an e-mail with, "Hey, John!" and forwarding jokes will

not make an editor think you're his friendit will make him think you're a wacko.

Sometimes you will become good friends with an editor, and that's when you can

loosen up. But fake schmooziness will not make the process happen any faster.

Don't be presumptuous. Editors, like this one, emit an evil laugh when a writer states in

her query that she would like X amount of money and can have the article ready in Y

weeks. Get the editor interested in your story, and then you can negotiate.


21/45

Chapter 5

The Editor: Editor at a national women's health and fitness magazine.

The Peeve: Writers who prefer the competing magazine.

I would never hire a writer who:

Hasn't researched the magazine. For example, I may receive the odd pitch for a feature on

"decadent desserts" or "gastric bypass surgery." If these people would have done their

homework, they would realize our magazine is about eating well and diet and exercise,

and these pitches are completely off.


the most?

1. When I e-mail a writer to tell them I need a re-write, or additions to the story, and they

give me what I perceive to be "the cold shoulder" or "attitude" through e-mail. You can

tell by their tone that their ego has been bruised. (We writers can be a sensitive bunch.) I

prefer, when I ask for re-writes, that the writer replies with enthusiasm. They were

enthusiastic when I assigned the piece, and I expect them to keep it up from start to

finish.

2. When writers use the same sources over and over again. It strikes me as taking the easy

way out. I like a writer who does their homework and research. Or, if they can't come up

with someone new, ask for my suggestions.


22/45



Here's a deal-breaker: This happened to one of my fellow editors. She had a writer ask for

an extension on a piece that was due tomorrow. His reason for needing the extension:

"I'm so busy working on other stories for another magazine" (which happened to be our

competition). Of course we know you're working for other publications, but you don't

need to remind us of that. It shows us where your priorities aren't!


My biggest pet peeve is when a writer will fire off informal queries. For example, they

may send me an official query, and I'll turn it down. But I always welcome new ideas, so

I'll tell them "no thanks" but please feel free to keep pitching. And I'll get five e-mails in

a row, for random ideas like:

winter skin

varicose veins

botox

nail polish

highlights

In the end I just end up turning them down, as I don't have the time to say "what about

winter skin, can you please expand?" I'm not a stickler for formality, but I at least need a

few sentences. What's the meat of the story?


I generally won't assign them any more work. The only chance they get of working with

me again is if they pitch me a really good idea.


23/45

Peeve-Less Pointers

Don't rub their faces in it. Sure, you're writing for other magazineseditors know

thatbut you don't need to let your editor know that you work for publications that are

way cooler than hers. In other words: Don't ask, don't tell.

Vary your sources. Editors notice when you keep quoting the same sources over and

over. Expand your network of sources by contacting organizations and universities,

doing Google searches, checking Amazon.com for new books whose authors you can

interview, and using source-finding services such as ProfNet (www.profnet.com).

Send fleshed-out queries. Don't keep your editor guessingtell her what you're pitching

and why, with research, stats, quotes, and so on. In some cases it's fine to send several

ideas in one e-mailfor example if you've worked with the editor before or feel that

the editor would be amenable to it but even then you need to send ideas that are

fleshed out with at least a descriptive paragraph or two.


24/45

Chapter 6

The Editor: Editor of a trade magazine for the banking industry.

The Peeve: Writers who write the same article...for the competition.


Writers who say a book or show was entitled(rather than titled). They should definitely

know better.


One industry consultant queried me about an article she was working on. I gave her the

go-ahead. I also gave her guidelines that said simultaneous submissions were fine but

once a piece was accepted by us it couldn't be published elsewhere, nor would we publish

a piece that had been or would be published elsewhere.

So imagine my surprise when I read another industry magazine (after ours had been

mailed) and saw a feature by the same author on the same topic, with the same lede and

much of the other copy the same. I contacted the writer, who apologized profusely...she

said that since she wasn't an experienced writer, she didn't realize that what she had done

was a major no-no. (It seems she really didn't pay much attention to the guidelines I had

sent.)


The biggest headache used to be over the payment. I didn't (and still don't) have a big

budget. (I actually had a writer laugh when I quoted the price for a piece.) When given

the price quote, some writers actually balked at the word count they were given, arguing

they should be allowed to turn in fewer words.


25/45


...doesn't have a electronic capabilities in this day and age.


the most?

Sloppy copy...that is, misspelled words. I've received copy where an individual's name

was spelled three different ways.



Making up quotes or sources. We don't always have the time or ability to check facts, and

(knock wood) we've never received a complaint from anyone, but I do worry about this

happening. (There have been so many incidents recently of writers submitting fiction for

fact. Very scary.)


I don't understand people who don't take the time to read (we send samples if requested)

the magazine and to learn its focus. I keep getting queries from writers who take a

consumer focus when the magazine is for the employees, board, and committee members

in our industry. I've received five queries from a gentleman who writes poems and

inspirational pieces for consumers. I wrote him three times, explaining why his work is

inappropriate for us. The other times, I've tossed his letters (yes, even the SASE).


26/45


to share?

Be confident but low-key, especially at a convention. I'm there for other reasons and don't

want or need to be constantly bombarded with queries or requests to be considered for a

future assignment.


If a writer consistently does something I've called him/her on, I just won't use that writer

again.

For example, I've twice used a writer (a very good writer) who never uses quotation

marks around his quotes. After the second time, I talked to him about it; he thanked me

and promised to use them in the future...for me and other editors. I haven't used him

again but when I do, if he still has an aversion to quotation marks, I will stop using him.


One thing that drives me crazy is a writer who not only misses his/her deadlines but who

doesn't even bother to call to say the copy won't be turned in. I've been left more than a

few times with an editorial hole to fill. Fortunately, I've been able to find writers (in-

house and freelancers) who could turn in a well-written and informative piece very

quickly. And most of the times, those articles have required very little editing. For all of

those writers, I'm extremely thankful.


Never miss a deadline; if you find that you won't be able to make your deadline, give the

editor enough notice.


27/45


Ask the editor what style book she/he uses and follow that. Don't put a lot of formatting

in your copy. Write well.

Here are some comments from a fellow writer/editor:

My pet peeves are writers who send e-mail queries with the same question over and over

again but written in different formats.

I think any typos, especially proper noun mistakes, are a big no-no. I'm not a fan of

dashes as breaks in a sentence; first-person narrative unless the piece demands it; heavy

sarcasm ('cause it doesn't usually come off in print); excessive use of semi-colons,

commas, and capitalization or any single grammar tool used to excess; or questions at

the beginning of an article or paragraph.


...strawberry is to chocolate. (The strawberry is fine on its own but the chocolate takes it

up another (taste) level.)


28/45

Peeve-Less Pointers

Don't compete with the magazine. It's certainly okay to write articles for a magazine's

competition, and it's also okay to write articles on the same topic for non-competing

magazines. What's notokay is to write similar articles for magazines that target the

same readership.

Check your spelling. So many editors have told me that misspellings are a big problem

that I must tell everybody to learn to use the spell check function on their word

processing program. But don't rely on the spell checker, which doesn't know that you

meant "that" instead of "hat" or "friend" instead of "fiend": put your queries and articles

aside for a bit and then reread with fresh eyes to catch any typos and misspellings.

Don't guess at facts and figures. Every assertion in your article should be backed up

with an expert, a study, a book, or some other reliable resource.


29/45

Chapter 7

The Editor: Editor of an RV travel magazine.

The Peeve: Writers who insult the magazine.


I get an amazing number of articles written by inanimate objects and pets. People

anthropomorphize their trucks, trailers, dogs, and cats to tell their stories, thinking that it

is cute. Typically this is done by novice writers who are afraid of their own voice.


Once, a determined writer wrote me repeatedly to tell me how hilariously funny he was.

He extolled his credentials as a writer, but when I checked them I found he was mostly

self-published online. Still, he insisted on sending me finished "humor" pieces, one after

another, each more horrifically un-funny than the previous.


One writer asked for payment up front, because the magazine was unknown to her, and

she'd been burned by other magazines that went out of business. This was pretty ballsy

considering she contacted me! Trying to establish a long-term relationship, I agreed to the

request.

On her next article assignment, she again requested up-front payment because was

concerned about her cash flow. I turned her down and she responded with this logic: "If I

write for you now, I'll get paid in spring. If I write for another magazine, I'll get paid

now." So now she doesn't get paid by us at all.


30/45


...can't convey ideas in a compelling way.


the most?

Picking one is tough. I think failing to read the Writer's Guidelines on our website is

probably the most common error.

Another common error is for a writer to say something like this: "If you like this article, I

plan to write a series for your magazine which you can publish and we can negotiate the

fee." Who said anything about a series? Everyone wants to be a columnist, but few are

willing to do the hard work needed to earn the position. I'm tempted to say, "Sure, just

have your agent call me and we'll have lunch."



A few writers have adopted a threatening tone in their e-mails, i.e., if you don't agree to

my demands, I'll never write for you again. I've also heard words to the effect of, "I'm a

great writer and you willaccept my ideas." No editor has time for prima donnas.

EGO=failure.


No question: the most annoying thing a writer can do is send a query without having

actually read the magazine. This is usually because the writer doesn't want to shell out

eight bucks for a single copy. It's always clear when a writer is querying "in the dark" and

such queries are always treated with extreme skepticism, even if well-written.


31/45

Do you have any DOs and DON'Ts to share?

DO read the Writer's Guidelines carefully

DON'T try to re-negotiate terms on your first job, unless there are exceptional

circumstances

DON'T bother telling the editor that they will like your writing. The editor has to choose

writers and articles that fit the magazine, regardless of how he/she personally feels.

DO write short queries that show your skill in conveying ideas and images efficiently.


I try to work with all writers, but if they have an ego and they annoy me, they are

guaranteed to be rejected. People who make it clear that they can accept constructive

criticism and learn from their mistakes get a second chance.


Accept that the best writers are people who love writing. If you love writing so much that

you'd do it for free, you might be successful as a freelancer. Keep practicing the craft and

improving your skillsdon't ever convince yourself that you have reached a level where

you can't become a better writer.


...hopefully, as grad student is to professor. But all too often, cat and dog...


32/45

Peeve-Less Pointers

Show, don't tell. Don't tell an editor that your article will be funny, or informative, or

heart-wrenchingshow him by making your query funny, informative, or heart-

wrenching.

Don't insult the magazine. If you feel a magazine is on shaky financial ground, just

don't write for it.

Sneak a copy of the magazine. It's understandable that you may not want to spend $8 on

a back issue of a magazine just to figure out if you'd like to pitch the publication.

Instead, visit the magazine's website to see if back issues are archived there, check the

magazines section at your local library, find out if your library lets patrons access the

EBSCO magazines databaseor even ask the editor how you can get a back issue to

study...some of them will send you one for free.


33/45


34/45

Of course, part of it is that writing is less tangible than construction, which means there

are a lot more murky areas, but...I always found it interesting that writers nickel and dime

over these kinds of things.

I'm not saying writers should be pushovers or take a lot of crap from PIA editors, but I

think writers who argue over a couple hundred bucks on one assignment, in the end, lose

thousands of dollars worth of work in lost assignments, because editors don't want to deal

with the writer who resists every step of the revision process. Editors want to work with

writers who understand that reasonable (and sometimes massive, if justified) revisions are

a part of the creative and artistic process.


I don't mind follow-ups to get an answer, but when it becomes annoyingly persistent, it's

like a pathetic date situation, where the pursuer just doesn't get the hint.

Writers should understand that if they're dealing with editors they don't know, they're

basically telemarketersthey're trying to sell something to a magazine that may or may

not need what they're selling. Yes, it'd be nice for every editor to respond to every query,

and I understand writers who are upset that they don't get an answer. But in most cases,

no answer is like a telemarketer hang-up: We don't want it.


I've had a couple writers who always submit more material than I've asked for. That's a

huge help to the editor (as long as it's not overboard). I've had writers tell me they're just

trying to cut the last five words out to make the word count. Unless I tell you to nail the

word count on the first draft, I just want a relatively close draft with thorough and strong

research. So a little extra material gives me a little more flexibility and ammunition in the

editing process.


35/45


Research, research, research. In many cases, we're paying for the goods you uncover

how original and strong the material isnot the style. I hate when writers think that just

because they wrote 1,200 words their job is done. If it's not good material, the job is just

beginning.

Peeve-Less Pointers

Take the hint. Ideas that are "close but no cigar" usually get encouraging, personalized

rejections, so if an editor keeps sending you generic form rejections, you should take a

close look at your ideas and queries. Be sure that when you pitch ideas you're thinking

about what the editor and his readers want, not just about whatyou want to write.

Do your research. As this editor says, the information is even more important than the

writing style. Read every sentence in your article and ask yourself, "Will this raise any

questions in the mind of the editor or reader?" If so, what are they, and how can you

answer them?

Perfect your possessives. "It's" is a contraction of "it" and "is." "Its" is the possessive, as

in "The dog wags its tail." "They're" is a contraction of "they are," and "their" is the

third-person plural possessive, as in "Writers should mind their details." For more

information on these and other grammar points, visit Strunk & White's Elements of

Style online at www.bartleby.com/141/.


36/45

Chapter 9


The Peeve: Queries that are longer than the article they're pitching.


I once assigned a piece that had to do with how a leading health organization's guidelines

weren't stringent enough. The assignment was to give better guidelines to our readers, but

the writer wrote the whole story based on that organization's info and experts. When I

asked the writer to talk to scientists outside of that organization, she balked. She deemed

that level of reporting too time-consuming for a piece that was going to run around 250

words. Of course, I'll never use her again.


...is an expert in the field they're pitching, but has no consumer journalism experience.

(For instance, the woman that works at a hearing clinic, and thinks she'd therefore write a

great story for us on kids and hearing.) In terms of health, without fail these "writers"

send clinical, boring prose that needs to be completely rewritten.


the most?

I dislike sloppy and/or informal pitches, especially from writers new to me.

There are also the writers who e-mail you too often asking when their piece is going to

run, and campaigning for it as if it's the most important story out there. This shows a lack

of understanding of the complexity of how a magazine is put together.


37/45



Act like they're my boss. Once, an established writer didn't like my method of sending

revision notes (I sent them in the body of an e-mail). She informed me that, "next time,

you should send them in Microsoft Word track changes instead." My response: What

next time?


This happens a lot with health: Writers forward a study and just ask if I'm interested. My

message to them: Don't be lazy; send me a fleshed-out pitch!

And the flip side: Writers who send thousand-word pitches (that's an exaggeration, but

you get the point). When you're pitching a department piece for a consumer magazine, a

rule of thumb: Your pitch should never be longer than the piece itself will likely be! You

need to display an ability to distill the info.


I don't work with them again.


38/45

Peeve-Less Pointers

Keep the length in check. It's true that I'm a huge proponent of the "long as it needs to

be" query, but here's a tip: a query typically doesn't need to be longer than the piece

itself. When pitching a short, front-of-the-book piece, some writers like to just write up

the short and send it in, finding it easier, and that's fine. But if you prefer to write a

query for your short, keep it to a brief paragraph or two.

Pitch your writing creds. As this editor says, people who rely too much on their

professional experience tend to write clinical, boring pieces. Even if you're an expert,

use your query to wow the editor with your writing prowess, and be sure to mention

who you've written for in the past (if you have magazine writing experience; otherwise

leave that part out).

Get all sides of the story. Unless you're writing a puff piece, find different sources who

can talk about various sides of the issue.


39/45

Chapter 10

The Editor: Former senior editor of a national business magazine and

current freelance editor working on business publications and nonprofit

communications.

The Peeve: "Passive" writers.


My biggest peeve is passive sentences. It drives me nuts and it's so common.

There are two instances where I see it: The first is when I'm editing a journalist. It shows

that the writer is lazy and inexperienced. It takes all the energy out of the writing.

The other time I see it is when I edit nonprofit writing. Nonprofit communication tends to

be very political because nonprofit organizations have to satisfy a gazillion people. They

rely on the passive voice so that no one has to take responsibility for what they're

advising people to do. In order to stay out of trouble, for example, they'll say, "Policy

should be written..." as opposed to, "The governor should write a policy..."


A long time ago I was at [big-name business magazine] and someone pitched me a story

that sounded interesting. I think I'm a pretty tough editor...I don't hesitate to send

something back for rewrites. But I explain the rewrites thoroughly and I'm nice about it.

So when the writer handed in a draft and it was very thin and not well researched, I sent it

back with questions.

The writer answered one or two of the questionsand then disappeared. I had a deadline

and a hole in the magazine and no story. I called and called the writer, and I was furious.


40/45

The writer just didn't want to do it. This writer had lots of creditsshe was not a new

writer. It's horrifying when you're a new editor at a national magazine and your reputation

is on the line and you hire someone who disappears.

Lately I've had a couple more writers do the same thing. One in particular disappeared for

a month and never did some of the work I assigned.


Plagiarized or made things up.


the most?

I don't like it when a writer complains that you're not paying him very well but still wants

the assignment. I called one writer based on her resume. She said that the pay is terrible,

which is true, but she wanted to do the assignment anyway. She then turned in an article

that clearly displayed that she didn't understand the subject or the instructions.

I asked her to revise the piece, and I got a grudging note about how many hours she

already spent on it. She accepted the assignment, she knew the fee, so she should have

written it to the best of her ability. She also should have let me know she needed help

before she turned it in; I would have happily helped her.

What's the craziest query you've ever gotten?

A long time ago, when I was working for a technology magazine, I got a letter from

someone who wanted me to publicize a day of global abstinence.


41/45



Lazy writers make me crazy. When writers have tons of credits you expect them to be

professional, but then they come out with slipshod work that shows they clearly didn't

research the subject well. Because they don't grasp the subject, they totally miss the boat,

and then they won't put in the work to find the boat.


Queries that are too general or obvious. I'd get queries that said, "I'd like to write a story

that tells entrepreneurs how to raise money to start a new business." There's a difference

between a topic and a story. A lot of people write topic queries.


I blackball them and put their name up in lights in Times Square. Seriously, luckily I've

worked with a lot more good writers than bad ones, and the good ones become friends for

life. I'll try and try again until it's clear that someone is not cutting the mustard, then I try

to let them down easily. At some point I'll be honest and say that this isn't working.


His name is Samuel Fromartz. He's a very experienced writer who recently published a

book called Organic, Inc. We wound up working on a story together about an

entrepreneur who turned around a failing restaurant. He did a really good job, but the

story went through three or four rounds of revisionsand he never complained.

He worked his butt off. He did the research and said, "This is how I think this story will

go," and he was right. He did the real legwork, and I just responded to it. I really acted on

that story the way an editor should, which is to bring out the best in a writer instead of


42/45

trying to impose my own will on someone. That story was published in the anthology

Best Business Stories of the Year 2002.

Is there anything else you'd like to tell writers?

If you're interested in business stories, become financially literate. If you can read a profit

and loss statement, if you have a basic understanding of a balance sheet, that will give

you a leg up on so many business writers out there who don't know how to do that.

There's a lot of good stuff in annual reportsnuggets of stories. Not in the hypey stuff,

but in the actual filing to the SEC. Businesses have to report litigation, hazardous waste

cleanups, layoffs. It's in the fine print.


43/45

Peeve-Less Pointers

Be active. As this editor says, the passive voice makes your writing look weak and

weasely. Wherever you can, replace passive constructions with active ones; for

example, replace "It was shown in a recent research study that 100% of writers love

The Renegade Writer" with "Recent research shows that 100% of writers love The

Renegade Writer."

Make your editor look good. Bailing on your assignment or disappearing right before

deadline make your editor look like a jerk to her boss; your job is to make your editor

look like a genius, so wow her (and her boss) with thorough research, awe-inspiring

prose, and perfect punctuality.

Slant it. Article ideas like "How to Start a Business," "Visiting New York City," and

"The Bride's Top 10 Problems: Solved" are way too broad. You need to give your ideas

a narrow slant that fits the magazine's topic and tone. What kind of business will you

help the reader start, or what aspect of starting a business will you address? What part

of New York City will you discuss, and what makes it special? What kind of problems

will you help the bride solve: in-law, sex, finances, wedding snafus?


44/45

About the Author

I've written for more than 130 magazines, includingRedbook, USA Weekend, WebMD,

Women's Health, Inc., Writer's Digest, and other trade and newsstand magazines. I co-

authored The Renegade Writer: A Totally Unconventional Guide to Freelance Writing

Success and The Renegade Writer's Query Letters That Rock.

I'm also a certified personal trainer and professional wellness coach, and run the HappyFit

blog. You can read more about my services at www.happyfitcoaching.com.

I live in Apex, NC, with my writer husband, son, and two cats. My interests include science

fiction, languages & linguistics, yoga, fitness, meditation, Thai iced tea, and cats.

I offer several free and not-so-free resources for writers:

A free packet of 10 successful query letters written by yours truly and other writers. Sign

up for my mailing list to get your free copy: http://www.therenegadewriter.com/free-

query-packet/.

The Review Copy Helper, a directory of more than 200 book publishers/imprints with

instructions on how to order review copies from each one.

www.lindaformichelli.com/reviewcopy

An eight-week e-course on how to get published in magazines. This course will help you,

in eight steps, generate a salable idea, find markets for it, sleuth out editors' names and

contact info, research your idea, and write a winning query letter. The Premium version

of the course includes eight weeks of personalized e-mail support. Previous students have

landed assignments in Woman's Day,For Me,Black Health, Cottage Living,MyBusiness,

E: The Environmental Magazine, Spirituality & Health, SELF,Pizza Today, and more.

http://www.therenegadewriter.com/new-renegade-writer-classes/


45/45

About the Illustrator

Craig Maher is a freelance illustrator with over ten years of experience. He has painted

everything from mutated vampires to dusty gunslingers, samurai warlords, and even a

few bad dreams. Craig's clients include Wizards of the Coast, White Wolf Game Studio,

SOMA magazine, Alderac Entertainment Group, Iron Crown Enterprises, Steve Jackson

Games, Third World Games, Precedence Publishing, and FASA Corporation. He's

currently at work on Glamour, a supernatural graphic novel. Visit Craig online and view

his portfolio at www.craigmaher.net.

editors unleashed no cover

Documents