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Effective Communication Skills
OBECTIVES:
• Objective of effective communication
• Role of manager in internal & external
communication
• Barriers to effective communication
• Ways to improve communication
• Characteristics of good communication
• Learn how to use own strength & work on area
of improvement
Objectives of
Effective Communication
‘The greatest ability in business is to
get along with others and influence
their actions.’
~ John Hancoak
What is communication?
• Communication is the process
by which information,
meanings and feelings are
shared by people through the
exchange of verbal and non-
verbal messages.
Communication is essential for
managers as:
• it is a core management activity of
managers; and
• should not be taken for granted.
Rather it is a skill which should be
developed with sensitivity & care.
Objectives of communication:
• To ensure common understanding;
• To meet agreed objectives; and…
•To achieve intended results on the key
dimensions of communication by:
* putting thoughts and ideas in
writing clearly, concisely and
correctly;
* making presentations confidently
and effectively;and…
* Listening actively to the feedback
and feeling of others;
* Keeping others informed and in
touch; and
* Managing meetings effectively.
Elements of communication
• The sender;
• The receiver;
• Media of communication including
written communication, face to face
interaction, telephone conversation,
email, etc;
• The message; and
• The feedback on the message.
INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION
THE SENDING PROCESS
Information that I
want to convey to
the receiver
Is transformed into
verbal and
nonverbal behavior
The Difference
Between Intent
And interpretation
THE RECEIVING PROCESS
And is interpreted
by the receiver
Who reacts to what
was interpreted
OBSERVABLE
BEHABIOR
Verbal: 7%
Nonverbal: 93%
2
4
3 1
Encode (or transform)
• Feelings
• Thoughts
• Attitudes
• Intentions
React (or feedback)
• Verbal and nonverbal response
• My understanding
Decode (or transform)
• Perceptions
• Interpretations
• Experiences
• Feelings
Body Language 58%
Tone of Voice 35%
Words 7%
Face to Face Communication Skills
Communication
Softeners
S - Smile
O - Open Gesture
F - Forward Lean
T - Touch
E - Eye Contact
N - Nod
Points to note during the
communication process:
* Attention
* Understanding
* Acceptance
* Retention
Role of Manager
in
Internal & External
Communication
A manager needs to perform the
following functions:
• To take initiative in explaining
organizational or departmental policies
and action;
• To gain awareness & understanding of
organizational and departmental issues;
• To provide forums and means of clients
and staff consultation.
Internal Communication • Relate with the department:
- Must respect and support the culture and
behavioral standards, the authority of those in higher management positions; and
- Must be willing to operate as part of the management team. If given the responsibility for developing organization structure, should aim for minimum possible layers of management and keep the reporting line clear.
• Relate with senior management:
- Share common goals and objectives;
- Know how senior operates, their management
styles & expectations, and the pressure and
constraints they face;
- Show supportive of their decisions;
- Find ways to present them with suggestions
and ideas, not problems or reversed delegation;
- Produce work results for meeting their work
targets.
• Relate with his/her manager/colleagues:
- Build up a strong team and help team members to
develop their abilities to the maximum;
- Ensure that his/her team will meet the objectives of
the department; and
- Maintain a high degree of interdependency, support,
resource and information sharing from fellow
managers.
External Communication
• Keep themselves attuned to various external issues, be alert of the external environment and its influence; and
• Use feedback to lay the foundation for proactive external relations, and seek opportunities to reach out for better understanding of their clients and stakeholders.
Choosing the appropriate means of:
Communication is a pre-requisite for effective
communication. The following factors should be
considered:
- The purpose which the messages are intended
to achieve;
- The size and distance of the audience;
- The time and resources available;
- The confidentiality of the message.
Means of Communication
• Written communication;
• Face-to-face communication;
• By telephone;
• By electronic mail.
Barriers
to
Effective Communication
Barriers to Effective Communication
A manager should be aware of the following
barriers to avoid communication breakdown:
- Environmental factors;
- Inappropriate means of communication;
- Problems of the sender;
- Problems of the receiver.
• Environmental factors: Physical barriers (e.g. noise) and long
distance may make communication very difficult.
• Inappropriate means of communication:
Using inappropriate means will make the communication ineffective.
• Problems of the sender: - Failing to obtain feedback from the receiver;
- Listening inattentively to the feedback;
- Over-communicating the superficial content and under-communicating the underlying meaning and feeling;
- Focusing on self rather than the receiver;
- Presenting the message with poor skills;
- Being preoccupied by emotions (e.g. hostility, stereotyping, past experience, etc.)
• Problems of the receiver:
- Being pre-occupied by personal values,
assumptions or beliefs;
- Being preoccupied by emotions (e.g.
hostility, defensiveness, stereotyping, past
experience, etc.);
- Jumping to cause and action too quickly;
- Misunderstanding the message;
- Listening to the message inattentively.
Ways
to
Improve Communication
Ways to Improve Communication
• Techniques for the sender: - Maintaining credibility;
- Encouraging two-way communication;
- Seeking feedback;
- Being sensitive to the receiver’s concern, interest, needs, perspective or emotion;
- Being aware of the language & meaning;
- Observing body language;
- Being aware of the physical environment.
• Techniques for the receiver:
- Developing listening skills;
- Being sensitive to the sender’s concern,
interest, needs, perspective or emotion;
- Giving feedback to the sender, especially
when there is doubt on the content or
meaning of the message.
• Techniques for senders & receivers:
- Regulating the information flow;
- Following up;
- Putting oneself in the other’s shoes;
- Listening for the whole message;
- Resisting distraction;
- Responding but not interrupting;
- Paraphrasing to confirm understanding;
- Seeking the real meaning;
- Allowing time for reflection;
- Being ready to respond.
Feedback
Skills
Important
Skills
Questioning
Skills
Language
Skills
Listening
Skills
Seek first to understand,
then to be understood.
~ Steven Covey
Most people do not listen with the
intent to understand;
they listen with the intent to reply.
They are either speaking or
preparing to speak.
Stephen Covey
Listening Listening plays an essential part in
communication.
To listen is to understand and to speak is to
be understood.
Managers should be aware of the poor
listening habits, and be equipped with
effective listening skills for more
effective communication.
The word ‘listen’
contains the same letters
as the word
‘silent’. Alfred Brendel
Poor Listening Habits • Being inattentive;
• Pretending to listen;
• Waiting for every chance to interrupt;
• Hearing what is expected;
• Getting defensive;
• Listening for points of disagreement.
Five Levels of Listening
1. Ignoring:
Not paying attention ; not intending to get the message.
2. Pretending:
Not really listening for the meaning of the message.
3. Selective listening:
Selecting the message to which one has the interest, and neglecting the rest.
4. Attentive listening:
Paying full attention to the sender’s
presentation so as to get all the message.
5. Empathetic listening:
To place oneself in the position of the
sender so that one can better understand
the background of the message and the
feeling of the sender.
How to Listen? - The ‘Cherish’ formula
Concentrate on listening
•Shut out all physical and mental distractions.
Hear the message
•Pay attention to both verbal and non-verbal information.
Empathize with the speaker
•Try to put yourself in his place so you can see his point of view.
Respond to the message
•Give the speaker an appropriate response, verbally or non-verbally.
•Ask the questions to clarify doubts.
Interpret the message
•Concentrate on the meaning of the words spoken.
•Base your opinion on available information.
Stay neutral
•Don’t be biased. Keep an open mind.
Hold the tongue
•Don’t interrupt as far as possible.
TYPES OF QUESTIONS
CLOSED
MULTIPLE
OPEN
PROBING
LEADING
How to Ask Questions?
• Use more open questions;
• Be clear & specific;
• Paraphrase to check understanding;
• Link questions to what has been said;
• Probe, whenever necessary.
Essence of Positive Feedback
BE CLEAR
BE SPECIFIC
WITH ADDED VALUE
No Feedback. Why?
• Giving away feedback means giving away power.
• Giving out feedback takes time.
• People will eventually find out for themselves.
• Giving negative feedback harms relationship.
Feedback
A way of finding out another’s opinion about
how well
how badly
we are doing
Feedback Constructively
• Don’t avoid feedback – use it as training tool;
• Always criticize privately;
• Focus on the issues, not the person;
• Get all the facts;
• Ask questions & listen to the answers;
• Set realistic goals for improvement.
Receiving Feedback
• Don’t be thin-skinned. Take feedback as well as praise with equal grace.
• If no one has ever given negative feedback to you, it probably means that you have never achieved anything significant.
Feedback on Poor Performer
1. Explain the improvement purpose
2. Specify what you have observed
3. State your position/the impact
4. Describe how you feel about it
5. Listen for response
6. State your expectations
7. Reassure your support
Complete Message to Give Feedback
1. ‘I see…’ (describe behaviour, facts)
2. ‘I think…’ (the impact, the effects)
3. ‘I feel…’ (describe your own feelings, e.g. disappointed…)
4. ‘I want…’ (ways of improvement & commitment)
Constructive Feedback vs. Destructive Feedback
• Solve problems
• Focus on behavior
• Strengthen relationship
• Build trust
• Is reciprocal
• Reduce stress
• Avoid conflict
• Enable development
• Is assertive
• Exacerbate problems
• Focus on personality
• Hurt relationship
• Destroy trust
• Is one way
• Increase stress
• Cause conflict
• Hinder development
• Is aggressive or
passive
Checklist to Get Feedback in Communication
Stayed open, non-defensive?
Listened attentively?
Encouraged the person by allowing him to
have sufficient time to think and respond?
Used appropriate body language?
Tried to understand the person’s opinion?
Asked for more information specifically?
Expressed a sincere, honest reaction?
Thanked the person for providing feedback?
‘Language is the
expression of human
personality in words…’
~ Wrenn CL (1949)
Much of what people said
could be related to
unconscious drives and
motives Sigmund Freud
‘The Psychopathology of Everyday Life’ (1901)
Language Skills
• Use simple, specific words
• Be ready to explain difficult terms, if any
• Be as concise as possible
*Using appropriate tone of voice and go at moderate
speed, invite clarification where necessary.
Language Skills
• At least 1,500,000,000 words make
up 5,031 languages.
Have you ever been
misunderstood?
Language Skills
“You can’t do anything right.”
“You’ll never make it.”
“You shouldn’t be in this business.”
(Have these words every been said to you?)
(Have you ever said these words to anyone?
How do you think it made them feel?)
Language Skills
“You’ve done a great job.”
“Thanks for coming through.”
“You’re irreplaceable.”
Characteristics
of
Good Communication
Characteristics of Good Communication
• Assertiveness
Aim to maintain win/win situation for all parties
concerned.
• Empathy
Able to put yourself into other’s shoes.
• Communicating Supportively
Use various skills to validate information
throughout the communication process.
• Open Climate
Create an open climate to maximize contributions.
Assertiveness
Rights
Yours Mine
Verbal Features Non-verbal Features
• Expressive
• Blaming, sarcastic
or authoritative
tone
MAIN CONCERN: I
• Loud or brittle voice
• Cold, detached look
• Rigid posture
• Dominating gestures
(e.g. finger pointing)
Verbal Features Non-verbal Features
• Concise & to the point
• Firm tone
• No pleading or sarcasm
MAIN CONCERN:WE
• Appropriate loudness
• No hesitancy
• Relaxed posture
• Maintaining eye
contact
Verbal Features Non-verbal Features
• Indirect
• Apologetic tone
• Long-winded explanation or excuses
MAIN CONCERN:YOU
• Low voice
• Some hesitancy
• Uneasy body
movement
• Avoiding eye
contact
• Nervous laughter
Assertive Communication
• It involves honest communication at the right
moment to achieve mutual goals.
• It allows people with different viewpoints and goals
to minimize friction by reaching mutually
acceptable compromise.
Aggressive Boss
• Bosses should seek acceptance and
assistance, not agreement.
• A subordinate might have little choice but
to agree with the boss, but that doesn’t
mean he will accept the decision or assist
the boss as best he can.
Handling Disagreement
A good boss not only tolerates disagreement,
he encourages it and even creates it. Because
he cares about results more than protecting
his ego, he continuously searches for ways to
improve his and his group’s performance.
From No to Yes
• LISTEN ACTIVELY
- show them you understand
*that they feel strongly
*what they feel strongly about
*why they feel strongly about it
From No to Yes
• Win Yourself a Hearing
*Explain your own feelings
*Refer back to their points
*Make your points firmly but stay
friendly
From No to Yes
• Work to a Joint Solution
*Seek their idea
*Build on their idea
*Offer your idea
*Construct the solution form
everyone’s needs
‘EMPATHY’
• Put yourself in other’s shoes
• Don’t do to others what you don’t want others to do to you
• Do to others what you want others to do to you
What’s E.Q.?
1. Knowing one’s emotion
4 basic emotions: happiness,
anger, sadness and passion
2. Managing own emotions
3. Motivating oneself
4. Recognizing emotions in
others
5. Handling relationships
• Emotion is the feeling caused by an incident, it is
strong but instant usually lasting for a few
seconds to a minute.
What is left is the mood or state that lasts longer.
• Emotion is stimulated by an incident and followed
by action.
• People with high EQ cannot only
identify their feeling;
• but can also release their negative feeling &
• refocus on positive feeling.
(Way to manage emotions) Passion’s slave vs Master of your emotions
Emotional Flooding
Fouled Thinking
Negative
Consequences
Away from Goals
Emotional Master
Clear Thinking
Positive Consequences
Goal Achievement
HOW TO MASTER EMOTIONS EFFECTIVELY
• Perspective taking
• State control
- seeking out distractions
- deep breathing
- going for a walk
- relaxation methods
- active exercises
3. Motivating oneself
• Yesterday is history,
Tomorrow is mystery, &
Today is a present.
• ‘Hope for the best,
Plan for the worst, &
Take what comes with style and humor.’
Self Motivation
• Determining long-term vision
• Perseverance
• Upgrading goals continuously
• Delay of gratification
• Hope
- believing you have the will and the
means to achieve your goals
4. Recognizing emotions in others
An high EQ person employs Empathy to:
• Recognize & accept a person’s emotion
• Show willingness to share the emotion
• Help the person to describe the emotion
• Induce the person to speak out the matter that
causes the emotion
• Guide the person to search for alternatives
• Identify solution possibilities
5. Handling relationships
Anyone can become angry – that is easy.
But to be angry with the right person,
to the right degree,
at the right time,
for the right purpose &
in the right way
– this is not easy.
ARISTOTLE
Communicating Supportively • Skill Learning
– Probing response
• Asks a question about what the communicator just said or
about a topic selected by the listener
• Questioning can sometimes have the unwelcome effect of
switching the focus of attention from the communicator’s
statement (Why do you think that ways?)
– Reflecting response
• Just mirror back to the communicator the message that
was heard and to communicate understanding and
acceptance of the person.
Communicating Supportively
• Skill Learning
– Advising response
• Provides direction, evaluation, personal opinion, or instructions
• Help the communicator understand something that may have been
unclear before
• Help identify a problem solution
– Deflecting response
• Switches the focus from the communicator’s problem to one selected
by the listener
• Can be effective only if when the communicators need empathy or
re-assurance or support (I understand because of what happened to
…)
Communicating Supportively • Skill Learning
– Validating communication – helps people feel recognized, understood, accepted and valued
• Respectful communication (help subordinates feel that they have a stake in identifying problems, treat them as worthwhile and competent and emphasizing joint problem solving rather project a superior position)
• Flexibility in communication (communicating genuine humility, to be open
• Two-way communication (given “air time” to express their opinion and encourage to participate)
• Based on agreement (point out positive steps before past mistakes)
Creating an Open Communication Climate
• Downward Communication
to consult staff on matters that concern them
• Upward Communication
to seek for staff’s feedback and views
• Lateral Communication
to foster communication between peer groups and colleagues
To simplify messages, provide more face-to-face and informal communication.
Teams should keep the “big picture” in sight,
thereby preventing
“tunnel vision”.
This is especially critical when teams are
working feverishly on the narrow focus of
their own change goals and performance.
Language of Email
Functions:
• Asking for and giving information
• Asking for and reporting on actions
• Making and responding to recommendations
• Giving and responding to warnings
• Arranging get-togethers
• Complimenting others
• Congratulating others
• Apologising
Emails must be well-organised, written in an appropriate tone,
and written using correct language.
Organisation of Emails 1. When describing a situation or a sequence of events,
messages should be organised in logical or
chronological order.
2. When there is a request, suggestion or
recommendation, there are two ways of structuring the
information contained:
2.1 Front-loading
Put your request, suggestion or recommendation
right at the start of your message, and then filling in
background details later in the message.
Organisation of Emails 2.2 Back-loading
This method involves putting your request, suggestion or recommendation towards the end of the message.
There is no “best” method! If your message is simple and straightforward, front-loading is probably a good idea; on the other hand, if you need to persuade your reader or if there is a danger of offending your reader, then back-loading may work best.
Tone in Emails
• The tone you use in your message
reflects the relationship which exists
between you and your reader. Tone is
largely reflected in the formality and
certainty of your writing.
- CERTAINTY +
‘Tentative’
and ‘formal’
‘Neutral
certainty’
and ‘formal’
‘Certain’
and ‘formal’ F
OR
MA
LIT
Y -
‘Tentative’
and ‘neutral
formality’
‘Neutral
certainty’
and ‘neutral
formality’
‘Certain’
and ‘neutral
formality’
‘Tentative’
and
‘informal’
‘Neutral
certainty’
and
‘informal’
‘Certain’
and
‘informal’
1. A junior employee writing a short report for the boss giving recommendations on a particular project (Tone A).
2. A strict manager informing staff about company regulations (Tone B).
3. A colleague writing to suggest the time for a possible lunch gathering (Tone C).
4. An approachable manager welcoming new staff to the department. (Tone D).
Examples of four situations
The Five Ps of Effective Meetings
–Purpose
•Decisions / brainstorming / announcements
–Participants
•Size of the group / balance / common goals or values / relevant experience or knowledge of subject matter
–Planning
•Agenda / choose the most appropriate decision making format structures (by example / group discussion / brainstorming / consensus-building)
–Participation / Process
•Establishment of ground rules (how decisions will be made) / using informational displays / manage discussion / discourage quick fix / refrain from expressing strong personal opinions)
–Perspective
•Take time to prepare for the meeting / Listen to group members / Encourage participation
Language of Emails (Tone A)
Asking for information: I wonder if you would be so
kind as to provide me with
details of …?
Asking for action: I should be grateful if you
could…
Making suggestions: It may be worth
considering…
Giving a warning: There is a chance that X will
occur, if we do not Y.
Language of Emails (Tone B)
Asking for information: I should like to know exactly
what action has been taken..
Asking for action: Please ensure that you…
Making suggestions: It is definitely worth
considering…
Giving a warning: We urgently need…if we are
to avoid X.
Language of Emails (Tone C)
Asking for information: Could you let me know
what’s been done about…?.
Asking for action: Do you think it would be
possible to…?
Making suggestions: Can we get together
sometime later this week to
discuss…?
Giving a warning: If we don’t X, Y may happen.
Language of Emails (Tone D)
Asking for information: I want you to pass me all the
information you have about..
Asking for action: Do not forget to…
Making suggestions: We really should…
Giving a warning: Unless we X, Y will…
Tactics and Strategies
First decide whether it would be better to communicate verbally rather than in writing.
• Structure information in the way that best serves the purpose of the message.
• Use a tone that is appropriate for the relationship between you and your reader (formality/certainty).
• Try not to make your message too long.
• Think seriously before you append a file to your message. This file can be copied over to the hard disk of the recipient.
Key to Successful Communication
• Don’t over estimate the receiver’s
knowledge.
• Don’t under estimate the receiver’s
intelligence.
The 5 Critical Elements of
Communication:
• Speaker
• -express how you feel honestly & openly
• Clear Language
• -say what you mean
• Environment
• -free the air of distractions
• Listener
-listen carefully to what the speaker says
• Feedback
-verify and clarify
Be Tactful
• Think before you speak
• Apologize quickly when you make a
mistake
• Converse, not compete
• Time your comments
• Focus on behaviour, not personality
• Uncover hidden feelings
• Listen for feedback
Rules of Politeness
• Don’t impose
• Give options
• Make the addressee feel good – be
friendly
Interacting with Others
People usually respond in the same
manner that they are treated.
Thank You !