Ancient EgyptA brief history of things that you should probably know

The Geography

Egypt’s connection to water

• Egypt was very connected with water. They used the Nile for transportation. It also allowed them to keep tight with friendly nations and trade.

• They often built expansive canals in straight paths, building off the Nile. This was done because walking in the hot desert (especially while carrying materials) was time-consuming and all around uncomfortable.

Also. They used more than just the Nile.

• lots of mining and trading was done through the red sea. However, this was difficult as the currents were unpredictable.

Ok. I sound like a text book.

Insert Pharell Williams cover!

Because Im…

Ok, back to textbooks.

Egypt’s other geographical features.

The country was almost entirely composed of desert.• As you know, wheels don’t exactly work in sand. So, they did

something different.

They used sleds.

Well, not quite.

• Their sleds were much more basic. A flat surface (like a board of wood) with ropes tied onto it

This is how they did most transporting for major constructions.

Egypt’s society

Egyptians highly valued family life. In fact, children were seen as blessings. • God, how things have changed!

In poor families, mothers raised the kids. In more rich families, slaves or servants did it.

Also, women were actually treated quite as well as men.• They were allowed to help in business deals, could represent

themselves in court, and faced the same punishments!

Marriage in Egypt

I am so sorry for this slide, girls.

• Peasant girls married at 12 (“cooties” weren’t an excuse).

• If you were rich, you had a few more years.

Also, divorce was completely allowed.

• Not much actually stopped you from doing it. The women got the kids and some things, and were free to remarry.

They had a special social ranking system

• At the bottom were slaves and farmers.

• Next were the craftsmen

• Then scribes and soldiers (the pen is no mightier than the sword:

they are equal.

• Then nobles and priests.

• Then the viziers (they are high rulers)

• Then, lastly, the farm animals.

• No, I’m just kidding. The pharaoh.

Gods and embalming

Egypt was big on gods…

• Their gods had heads of animals, and the bodies of people.

• Ra, the sun god, had a falcon head

• Thoth, the god of knowledge, had a stork head

• Bastet, the cat god, had a… well… you can guess

• Horus, the war god, also… had a falcon head? Ok….

Other gods

• Geb, the god of earth

• Nut, the god of air

• Osiris, the god of the dead

• And who can forget Tawaret, the hippo god???

Embalming (making mummies)

• Step 1: Take the body to a special building, and rub it with good smelling lotion.

• Step 2: Cut a massive hole in the left side of the body, and take out the internal organs. Be sure to use your handheld harpoon to smash the brain into a smoothie, and take it out through the nose!

• Step 3: Dry the organs for 2-3 weeks with natron (it’s hard to explain what that is. It’s science and stuff).

• Step 4: Dry the inside of the body for 2-3 weeks with natron, drying all fluids.

• Step 5: the body is cleansed with Nile Water and rubbed with oil, to keep the body elastic.

• Step 6: the organs are to be returned to the body, and the body is filled with sawdust, leaves, what ever you can find to make it look lifelike. Rub the body with more good smelling lotion, and prepare to wrap.

Before we continue

• They used to put the organs in canopic jars, but they eventually put the organs back in the body

• The canopic jars were, however, still buried with the body to symbolically protect said organs.

• Imsety, the human-headed god, has his jar protect the liver.

• Baby, the baboon-headed god, has his jar take the lungs.

• Duamutef, the jackal-headed god, looks after the stomach.

• Qebehsenuef, ANOTHER falcon headed god (or maybe it’s Egyptian for Ra/Horus), looks after the intestines.

• Step 7: the body is wrapped with linen, and the linen is embedded with good luck charms.

• Step 8: put the body in a sarcophagus and bring it to the tomb!

Egypt as an empire

The force was strong with this one!

• Egypt was not a force to mess with. Their military was always strong, and their land covered a LOT more than what you see in those maps!

• They often were in control of both far south and even as far north as far into the middle east!

• A lot of the times, they just got lucky with amazing military-based pharaohs.

• They also had a good balance of friends and enemies. Well… maybe more enemies than friends, but…

They were also AMAZING builders

• You probably know them for the Great Pyramids, the Sphinx, and maybe that’s it.

• But they were ALWAYS impressive. Just look around their towns!

• Oftentimes, obelisks were built in tribute to the pharaoh. These were also placed in pairs outside of temples.

• They also made extravagant tombs with beautiful paintings. I won’t go into detail about how these things were done, but I will highlight some of them.

Pharaohs

Seti I: arguably the best general in all of Egypt

His non-war life

• He was the son of Ramesses I

• Eventually the father of Ramesses II

• He made a massive temple for worship. Problem: they hadn’t mastered roofs yet.

• If you wanted a big room, you needed a lot of columns.

• His room had over 100 columns.

His war life (the actual interesting part)

• He conquered tons of land, building forts among the way.

• I believe Egypt, around this time, made the chariot.

• His biggest achievement was capturing the city of Kadesh, owned by the Hittites. This was a city that many before him had tried and failed.

Ramesses II (or, as he is affectionately referred to, Ramesses The Great)

(this guy could start a trend nowadays: wearing snakes on your head and having butter taped to your chin to act as a beard)

Ramesses II’s battles

• He fought Jake and the Neverland Sherdan pirates

• He had countless campaigns against Syria

• He also fought Nubia, Libya and actually set up a peace treaty with the Hittites.

Ramesses “The Great's” death count

10,000

100,000

And a grand total of: 1,000,500 (those who defiled him included

His tomb

• His tomb was quite impressive, a massive catacomb of some luxury.

• In his center room, 4 statues of some important gods are depicted

• On the equinoxes, the light from the sun hits the sun god perfectly.

• In 1963-ish (I think), a man-made lake was being built. Ramesses’ tomb would surely perish.

• Multiple groups got together and decided to MOVE THE TOMB!!! It was moved in 5 massive chunks, and that’s cool.

THIS GUY RUINED EVERYTHING

• Fine. I’ll show his face.

Amenhotep IV

• Ugh. This guy was SO bad.

• It took multiple hundreds of years [with efforts from Seti I, Tutankhamen (we’ll get to him later) and many others] to clear the path of shining death he left behind.

His first big “accomplishment”

• He had the brilliant idea of erasing 2000 years of religion and creating a new one!

• This one had 1 god, a sun god (Aten), who was to be worshipped by everyone. If you didn’t worship him, or worshipped the old religion, you were severely punished.

• He actually CHANGED HIS NAME to Akhenaten, in honor of his amazing idea.

• So, of course, he was already a wack job.

• Oh, it gets worse.

His next blunder

• He decided he didn’t like the capital, which was usually Memphis or Thebes.

• One day, he was out riding, when his god came and spoke to him, saying that this spot is the center of the universe, and you should make a new city here.

• So, he did just that, and his one actual accomplishment came forth: a new building system! This one used smaller bricks instead of the 2 ton ones. He didn’t actually invent this, as he demanded the city be built faster, so the builders were forced to make something up.

I could go on, and on, and on, and on, and on….

And on, and on, and on……

and on, and on, and on, and on…. Ok, you get the joke (and the point), so let’s move on to his son: King Tutankhamen. • Yes, King Tut.

• He didn’t actually do much in his reign, but his discovery in 1922 sparked a new worldwide interest in Egypt, sparking more discoveries down the road.

• This is impressive, as tomb robbers got everything, always.

• His mask is displayed in the Cairo Museum, and is a popular symbol.

Hatshepsut (who looks like a guy in this photo, and that’s what she was going for). Also, all other photos were quite inappropriate.

Her claim to fame, and other facts.

• She was the original female pharaoh. Who needs Cleopatra, we have a legit feminine pharaoh!

• Before her, women couldn’t have power. They were treated mostly equally, but a woman COULDN’T rule.

• So, Hatshepsut put on a manly beard, and apparently fooled an entire nation. At first.

• Her tomb was elegant, and looked quite Greece, with fountains and gardens.

• Her son, Thutmose III, started countless wars, and killed tons. Way to make mommy proud!

The end.