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Emerging Leaders

Programme

Workshop 1

Leading Self

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Contents

What do I want to lead for? ......................................................................................................................................... 3

Self-Awareness ............................................................................................................................................................... 4

Strategies to develop self-awareness ................................................................................................................. 4

The Johari Window .................................................................................................................................................. 5

Using the Johari Window to increase self-awareness ................................................................................... 7

Your Johari Window ................................................................................................................................................ 8

Understanding and managing emotions .............................................................................................................. 10

The impact of feelings on performance............................................................................................................ 10

Channels of emotions ............................................................................................................................................. 10

Understanding the consequences of an emotional event: ........................................................................ 11

Self Confidence ............................................................................................................................................................. 15

Understanding your strengths............................................................................................................................. 15

Imposter Syndrome ................................................................................................................................................. 16

Self-Motivation .............................................................................................................................................................. 17

Final reflections: ........................................................................................................................................................... 19

The Window to Opportunity ...................................................................................................................................... 20

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Fundamental 1:

What do I want to lead for?

Think about your key values and what you want to lead for.

If you were to look back 15 years from now, how would you like people to

remember you as a leader?

What are your 3-5 core values that influence your leadership?

What is your Why?

Notes from Simon Senek video.

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Fundamental 2:

Self-Awareness Self-awareness refer to the ability to recognise how you’re feeling and why you’re feeling

that way, and the impact your behaviour has on others. Self-awareness is also about

developing the ability to use gut feelings to guide your decisions.

Self- awareness is the foundation from which we can begin to manage ourselves and

manage the interactions we have with others. Being personally and interpersonally

aware is truly a key skill in being an effective leader and the foundation from which to

build other skills. Only once I have an awareness of myself – of my abilities,

weaknesses, emotions, what motivates me, what frustrates me, can I then go on start

to self-manage my responses and my emotions, and further understand my impact on

others and how to improve interpersonal relationships.

Strategies to develop self-awareness

Johari’s window is a technique that can be used to develop self-awareness. Further detail

on this can be found later in the workbook. Other strategies include personality

questionnaires, 360 feedback and positive affirmations.

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The Johari Window

One of the single biggest predictors of leadership success is the degree to which a

leader knows themself and is aware of their strengths, weaknesses and the impact they

have on others. The process of giving and receiving feedback is an extremely

important factor in this process and indeed in any situation where we are working with

other people. It is through feedback that we gain the insight to “see ourselves as others

see us”. It is also through feedback that we let others know how we see them. The

process of giving and receiving can be illustrated by a model called the Johari Window,

originally developed by two psychologists: Joe Luft and Harry Ingham (1955). The

model can be seen as a window for communication through which you give and receive

information about yourselves and others

The model is shown below:

Looking at the four panes of the window in terms of columns and rows, the two columns

represent the SELF and the two rows represent OTHERS. The first column contains things

“I know about myself”, and the second column contains things “I don’t know about myself”.

The first row contains things “others know about me”, and the second row contains things

“others don’t know about me”.

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The four quadrants in brief:

1) The KNOWN AREA contains the things I know about myself and which other people

also know. It is an area characterised by free and open exchange of information between

myself and others. The behaviour here is public and open to everyone. The KNOWN AREA

increases in size as the level of trust increases between individuals and more information,

particularly relevant information, is shared.

2) The BLIND SPOT contains information "I don’t know about myself but which others may

know". As I begin to participate more I communicate all kinds of information of which I am

not aware, but which is picked up by others. This information may be in the form of: verbal

cues, mannerisms, the way I say things, body language, and the style in which I relate to

others.

The extent to which we are insensitive to much of our own behaviour, and what it may

communicate to others, can be surprising, disconcerting, exciting and developmental if we

are willing to listen.

3) The HIDDEN AREA involves things "I know about myself but of which others are

unaware". For one reason or another I keep this information to myself. My fear may be that

if others knew about my thoughts, feelings, perceptions, opinions, desires and values they

may reject, disapprove, attack, discount or hurt me in some way there are also things which

I will quite legitimately want to keep to myself. As a consequence I withhold this information.

It may be that I don’t see the supportive elements in other people. My assumptions may be

that, if I start revealing my private self, others will judge me negatively.

4) The UNKNOWN AREA contains things that neither I, nor others, know about me. Some

of this information may be so far below the surface that I may never become aware of it.

Other material, however, may be below the surface of awareness to myself and others, but

it can be made public through an exchange of feedback. This area may represent such

things as: early childhood memories, conditioned responses, latent potential,

unrecognised resources, how I might behave in certain situations in the future.

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Using the Johari Window to increase self-awareness

The information contained in these rows and columns is not static but moves from one

pane to another as levels of trust and honesty and the exchange of feedback, attitudes

and opinions vary between people. As a consequence of this movement, the size and

shape of the panes within the window will vary, as shown below:

When working with others, especially as a leader, our aim should be to provide feedback

to each other where appropriate. This process helps to reduce an individual’s Blind Spot,

giving him/her information about themselves that they did not know before, as well as

increasing the size of the Known Area.

A second way to increase openness in the relationship is to encourage the individual to

reduce their Hidden Area. In other words, encouraging him/her to disclose information

about themselves (perhaps their feelings or reactions about their performance, their

perceptions or motivations), or by giving feedback to you.

Using this effective two-way feedback process, other information that may have been in

the Unknown quadrant may begin to surface. For example, the individual may become

aware of his/her potential or talent in a particular task as a result of guidance and

encouragement from you.

In order for this two-way feedback process to be effective, the individual must develop a

receptive attitude and actively encourage feedback from you as the leader, as well as

trusting in you and the feedback you give him/her. In turn, as the leader, you need to

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develop and foster an atmosphere of trust and openness in the relationship. In terms of the

Johari Window, the Known Area increases in size as the level of trust increases between

individuals and more information is shared.

Your Johari Window

• Known Area: What behaviours do you want people to see at work?

• Hidden area: What information is known to you but hidden to others; how might people

experience that?

• What might people see that you don't know about? What type of feedback have you had that

perhaps you disagree with?

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Known Area

Blind Spot

Hidden Area

Unknown Area

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Fundamental 3

Understanding and managing emotions

Self-Regulation/self-management of emotions allows you to select the particular emotion

you wish to experience at a given moment, in a particular situation. This process takes a

lot of practice and a considerable amount of self-control, but mastering it will allow you to

take ownership of your emotions. It needs to be noted, however, that self-regulation is more

than merely ignoring negative emotions. It is an active process that takes considerable

training and focus to accomplish.

The impact of feelings on performance

In a study done by the Hay Group in nineteen insurance companies, they found that the climate created by the CEOs among their direct reports predicted the business performance of the entire organisation. In 75 percent of cases, climate alone accurately sorted companies into high versus low profits and growth. “In cardiac care units where the nurses’ general mood was ‘depressed’, the death rate among patients was four times higher than on comparable units”. (Schneider & Boven). “Upbeat moods make people more optimistic about the ability to achieve a goal, enhance creativity and decision-making skills, and predispose people to be helpful”. (Fisher & Noble) “Research on humour at work reveals that a well-timed joke or playful laughter can stimulate creativity, open lines of communication, enhance a sense of connection and trust, and make work more fun”. (Clause & Spurgeon) A study by Barsade, Warde et al done amongst CEOs and their top teams, found that the

better they worked together, the better the company’s business results. The converse had

a direct negative impact on the company’s market return. Unfortunately the person with the

lowest EQ in the group determines the base line at which a team functions!

Channels of emotions

Emotions express themselves through three channels, physically, in our thoughts, and in

our impulses. You can learn how to identify your feelings by paying attention to these

channels as they provide essential cues about what you are feeling.

Physical sensations - All emotions have some kind of physical expression. Each emotion

will have its own way of showing up in your body’s reaction. Different people react to the

same emotion with different physical sensations. Some people may feel tension in their

forehead while others may feel it in their lower back or with an upset stomach. Many of

your body’s reactions, which (up to now) you may have thought were just stray physical

events, are actually signals to you that you are experiencing some kind of emotion. In fact,

some physical illnesses result from chronic feelings, such as anger or anxiety that go

unrecognized. The toll of chronic physical reactions accumulates until real damage is done.

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Thoughts - Emotions prioritise our thoughts. You can’t focus on everything at every

moment. What do you select? You focus on whatever is most emotionally relevant to you

at the time. Thus, your thoughts can help you know what you are feeling. Here are some

examples:

If you find that your focus is on all the negative characteristics of the person across your

desk, it might indicate that you are angry with that person. If you find that your focus is on

lost opportunities, it might be a signal that you are feeling sad or regretful. If you find that

your focus is on threats, you might be feeling anxious.

Impulses - Emotions create an impulse to act. You might not follow through with the

impulse but you can still notice that you “feel like” doing this or that Here are some

examples:

If you feel like hitting, you are probably angry.

If you feel like crying, you may be sad or frustrated.

If you feel like running, running, running, you may be experiencing anxiety.

A good thing about being aware of your feelings is that you can identify your impulses

earlier. That way you can have more control over which impulses your good judgment

allows you to indulge and which ones are best put away.

Understanding the consequences of an emotional event:

One way to start understanding emotions and the impact they can have is to look at the

consequences that occur following a particular emotion. From the original feeling that you

might experience, this can develop into related thoughts, actions and results for you.

For example, you might have a presentation to do that you are particularly nervous about.

The pattern would look something like this:

LONG TERM

RESULT

IMMEDIATE

RESULTACTIONTHINKINGFEELING

Anxious about

presenting

Has to keep on doing

presenting

Embarrassed

Disappointed in self

Panic

Stutters

Forgets key points

Fear of failure

So much at stake

Anxious

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The emotion you feel first could be anxiety, this may present itself in any one of the three

channels previously expressed. You might have thoughts such as “Can I really do this?”

“I’m going to fail” or “What will happen if I do a bad job?” These negative emotions and the

corresponding thoughts could then lead to an in the moment action of stuttering, making a

mistake or forgetting a line. The immediate result of this is that you might feel embarrassed

or disappointed that you didn’t do as good a job as you had hoped, but the longer term

result could be more wide reaching – increased nerves and a general dislike of

presentations going forwards.

Complete the following diagram for an emotional event you have recently experienced.

How were you feeling before and during the event?

What were you thinking during the event?

What did you do in the situation?

What was the immediate result?

How did this event impact on you in the long term?

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Turning emotions around into positives:

Emotional events can also be explored from a positive standpoint. Take the event you looked just

looked at; how could you change this to make it a positive. In the above example of giving a

presentation, instead of feeling anxious you could flip this emotion into excitement.

Fear could become curiosity, sadness could become appreciation. Now look at your example,

how could you flip it?

CONFIDENCE GROWS, START

TO ENJOY PRESENTATIONS

Feel confident and ready

to go

Gets up with

confidence, smile at

room

This is going to be

great- I know it

Excited

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Fundamental 4

Self Confidence

Having a positive level of self-confidence can come from many sources, but a good amount of self-

awareness is a strong place to start. Self-confidence can be narrowed down to having a feeling of

trust in our ability, judgements and decision.

Undoubtedly self-confidence is an important tool for a leader, but so many of us struggle with it.

Confidence can be fickle – on one day you might feel highly confident, on another you might feel

the opposite. The important thing is to try and work out – what supports me in feeling my most

confident?

Understanding your strengths

“Think of your national athletics team at the Olympics. All the individuals in it are exceptionally

talented – but at different things. The javelin thrower is able to throw his javelin powerfully and

release it from his grasp at exactly the right time; the marathon runner has phenomenal endurance;

and the sprinter has powerful leg muscles so that she can explode out of the starting blocks. No

team manager would encourage the sprinter to start throwing javelins, nor would he assign the

endurance athlete to the 100 meter race. If he did, he'd be ignoring their strengths, and expecting

them to deliver results from an area of weakness.” MindTools.

It is really important to understand the strengths we each hold. Often it is our criticisms that are

most remembered – and we therefore focus on improving our areas of weakness, and forget to

focus on our strengths.

Understanding strengths reflection. The five people would say my strengths are:

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Imposter Syndrome

Sometimes, when our confidence is low, we can experience what is sometimes called ‘imposter

syndrome’. In short, this can mean feeling like we don’t belong, that we aren’t good enough to

complete the task assigned to us, or ultimately that we will get found as an imposter. When

individuals feel like an imposter, they also tend to assume that everyone else around them belongs

(i.e. everyone here but me knows what they’re doing).

If you encounter imposter feelings, some positive things to remember are:

Imposter syndrome is typically associated with high achievers; when we become more

specialised in our role we begin to better understand the gaps in our knowledge and

understanding. To demonstrate this, think of a newly qualified, or recently graduated

member of staff who displays high levels of, perhaps unfounded, confidence. Essentially we

don’t know what we don’t know - the longer we spend in a role the more we can see, and

the more doubt can creep in!

Also, real frauds don’t worry about being a fraud!

Strengths summary:

Video notes

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Fundamental 5

Self-Motivation

Self-motivation allows you to use your emotions to affect positive change in your life and

your leadership journey through dedicated pursuit of your goals, despite any obstacles in

your way. This process requires you to employ your emotions toward near-complete

positivity, optimism, confidence and persistence. It is essential that you release the

negative emotional reactions to achieve self-motivation.

Evidence suggests that we tend to feel most self-motivated when the following criteria are

in place.

1. We feel confident that we can complete a task well; we have paid attention to our

strengths and if necessary have used the power poses!

2. We are able to use our emotions positively; we are aware of positive and negative

thought patterns, and when negative When we have those feelings e.g. I am anxious,

I am physically feeling, I am thinking, my impulse is – how do I take my negative

narrative of ‘I can’t do this’ into a positive emotion ‘I can do this’. How to take the impulse

of wanting to run away, what is the opposite of that?

3. We can set meaningful goals that support us in achieving what we would like to;

concentrate on getting results, not on being busy. Set goals in writing, tell other people

what they are, and use positive language.

4. We are working in an environment that we find to be supportive; reflect on your

personal preferences – if you enjoy team environments seek out opportunities for you

to work in this way. If you prefer working in a quiet area with fewer distractions, make

sure there is a place that enables this. Utilise your support networks – tell people you

trust what you want to achieve and ask them to hold you accountable.

What motivates me?

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Additional tips for self-motivating

1. Understand what IMPORTANT tasks are for you - as opposed to URGENT tasks....

Things which are important are of higher value and meaning and bring you closer to your

goal.

Things which are urgent are time sensitive and need to be done NOW. Not everything

which is urgent is important.

2. Don't work from To-Do Lists....

People who work from to do lists are often busy and active but at the same time, often find

themselves constantly engaged in last minute, 'urgent' activity.

The problem with daily to do lists is that they prioritise all activities as being equal, they

begin with the assumption that everything needs to be done in equal or pretty equal

timeframes. Unless a to-do list is inspired firstly by a higher thinking model such as the 4

Quadrants model which incorporates the essential concept of 'Important' -v- 'Urgent'.

3. Practice saying NO.....

It's not as easy as you imagine but saying YES can get you into trouble at times -

overworked, stressed, frustrated...

Here are some ways to say no without saying no!

I'm happy to help you with that but I firstly need to prioritise this piece of work, could you

come back to me later?

Would it work for you if we asked X to do this as I am under pressure today to get this

done and it's really important for me and the business?

I'm busy with this priority right now so can I ask you how urgent this is and what's driving

that urgency? Can it wait?

I'm actually wondering about the importance of this task for me, I'm considering not doing

it and wonder what impact that would have for us?

4. Get Feedback from your Boss / Team / Friend / Spouse...

Get feedback from others about what they consider to be the highest priorities for you

and/or your team/family. It can be interesting to hear another person's perspective and can

sometimes help you to see the wood for the trees!

5. Review your priorities regularly...

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Every week or month, check back in with your goals and how they translate into actions

and priorities on a weekly / monthly / daily basis.

Remember - everything that's worth doing brings you closer to your goals whether on a

personal, interpersonal or professional level!

Final reflections:

As a consequence of today I am going to:

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The Window to Opportunity

1. Describe the situation

2. What would I have done previously?

3. What am I going to do now?

4. The outcome of this was…

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