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English 9A: Exposition

Tentative ScheduleSkills students need to learn in the Expository section in order to be successful for the Interim Assessment that

must be completed and turned in by mid-October 24.Expository Section:

7 strategies for Determining a Word’s Meaning from Context (page 3)o important for Town Send Press (TSP), SRI, SAT

Common Rhetorical Patterns (page 5) Read and Annotate (page 9) 4Qs (page 25) Transition Words (page 30) Outline (page 38) Summarizing Dos and Don’ts (page 43) FATT (page 44) Summarize articles

o “Paying Kids to go to School” (page 46) Read and annotate FATT Outline Summarize

o “Student Ids that Track Students” (page 50) ` Read and annotate FATT Outline Summarize

o “Startling Finds on Teenage Brains” (page 53) Read and annotate FATT Outline Summarize

Punctuating Titles (page 60) Integrating Quotes (TIES) (page 61)

Argumentative Section: Rhetorical Triangle (page 1)

o Logoso Ethoso Pathos

Fallacies (page 4) Evaluating Articles (apply Rhetorical triangle, fallacies, and evaluating articles to global warming and

College isn’t for everyone) (page 8)o Global Warming (page 9)

See sample of how to evaluate articleso College isn’t for everyone (page 20)

Apply what they learn DISTRICT INTERIM ASSESSMENT (due by OCTOBER 24, 2015)

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Course Description

Length – one semester Inspiration – Common Core standards Focus 1 – expository and argumentative writing

o We’ll learn how to read and annotate generate a working outline extend ideas presented in primary and secondary sources synthesize the content of several sources dealing with a single issue evaluate the credibility of an author’s argument (fallacies) deliver logical arguments accurately integrate quotes write using MLA format (in-text citations /proper heading/ style)

Focus 2 – vocabulary developmento We’ll learn

300+ words appropriate for college and the professional world how to distinguish between denotative and connotative meanings technical terms related to analyzing arguments

Focus 3 – mechanics o We’ll learn

grammar the essential qualities of well-written paragraphs and essays

Focus 4 – readingo We’ll learn

how to become better readers of expository and argumentative texts Major Assignments

o Composition of two summary & analysis essays position paper (comprised of three 3-5 page sections)

o Composition of three summariesReading of various book-length literary texts

o vocabulary exercises, quizzes, and testso notes/quizzes/tests on readings

Grading Scale & ProportionalityA 90 – 100% essays 40%B 80 – 89% homework assignments 20%C 70 – 79% in-class assignments 15%D 60 – 69% quizzes and tests 15%F 59% and below final examination 10%

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1A


Name: _______________________________ Date: ____________ Per: _____________

1st Day QuestionsPlease answer each question in complete sentences.

1. Have you ever written an argumentative essay? What was it on? How long was it?

2. Have you ever participated in a debate in class? What was it on? Did you enjoy it?

3. Have you ever written a research paper? What was it on? How long was it?

4. Do you hope to go to college after you graduate high school? What do you hope to major in?

5. Do you have any close relatives who are attending – or who have graduated from – college? Who are they, where did they go, and what did they major in?

6. What topics interest you? (music, history, sports, science-fiction, nature, gaming, art)

7. On a scale of 1-5, how would you rate your writing? Have you found it pretty easy to get essays done, or has writing them been difficult?

8. How easy or difficult is it for you to study at home? Is there a private, quiet place where you can get your work done? Are there often a lot of people there?

9. Are there any circumstances you’d like to tell me about which might affect how easily you’ll be able to get your assignments done?

10. Do you have access to a computer and printer outside of class?

11. Do you read/write another language besides English?

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1B


Seven Strategies for Determining a Word’s Meaning from Context

1. Definition and Restatement:

Students of the clarinet and other wind instruments have to work hard to perfect their embouchere, the correct positioning of the tongue and lips on the mouthpiece of the instrument.

He was a truly hirsute individual, with hair covering nearly every square inch of his skin.

Words/Phrases Signaling Definition and Restatement

which is or also known as that is in other words also called

2. Example

The motel we stayed at provided all the amenities, such as clean sheets and towels, a television, and a swimming pool.

Words Signaling Examples

like for instance this for example including especially thesesuch as other these include

3. Comparison

Like other reference books in the library, the Statistical Abstract is a helpful guide for researchers.

Words Signaling Comparisons

like resembling also in the same way as likewise identicalsimilarly related

4. Contrast

You may think him intransigent, but he’s actually pretty easy-going.

Words Signaling Contrasts

but on the other hand dissimilar although unlike differenton the contrary however in contrast to

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3A


5. Cause and Effect

Since a special treatment has made this fabric impervious to moisture, the fabric is now suitable for a raincoat.

Words Signaling Cause and Effect

because consequently when since therefore as a result

6. Inference from General Context

Come enjoy the salubrious climate of California.

In this part of the country, spring is the most ephemeral of seasons. Summer is usually mild and starts in June. Later, Labor Day marks the changing colors of fall, and the first real snowfall comes in early December. The remainder of the winter is long and brutal. Spring, on the other hand, lasts only a few days, vanishing almost before you know it has come.

7. Cognates (words in different languages that come from the same root)

The contractor is clearly culpable for the collapse of the bridge. He was seldom on the job to check the progress of the work. Records show that he authorized the use of inadequate materials in order to cut costs. Furthermore, examination of the footings disclosed that they were not up to specifications.

(A person who knows Spanish, or any other Romance language, has a great advantage in learning English academic vocabulary, which often derives from Latin roots. By contrast, the “easy” words in English are often Germanic in origin. So, English has “bug” and “insect” (similar to “insecto” in Spanish); “guilty” and “culpable” (identical to “culpable” in Spanish; “easy” and “facile”)

*Create a Townsend Press Account

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Overview of Rhetorical Patterns

rhetoric: the art/science of written/oral communication

rhetorician: what someone skilled in these areas might be called

rhetorical objective (or purpose): what one hopes to achieve with one’s speech or essay

Common Rhetorical Patterns and How They Might Be Used

compare – contrast: world religions class: what are the similarities and differences between Christianity and Islam?

cause and effect: environmental science class: what leads to global warming and why should we care?

summary: history class: what were the arguments for going to war against Iraq?

argument: criminal justice class: the United States should do away with the death penalty

description: geography class: the city of Zacatecas; the degree to which our rivers are polluted

proposal: (aka solution) sociology class: ideas for dealing with drug abuse

definition: philosophy class: what is justice?

classification: law class: should possession of marijuana be a misdemeanor or a felony? zoology: should animal ‘X’ be considered a mammal or a reptile?

p Process: engineering class: how does a diesel engine work?

n Narration: psychology class: what was your childhood like?

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Rhetorical Patterns Review Exercise

Match the Essay Topic to the Rhetorical Pattern

a) Compare and Contrastb) Cause and effectc) Summaryd) Argumente) Description

f) Proposalg) Definitionh) Classificationi) Processj) Narration

Circle the key word that helped you identify the pattern. In which class would you most likely write this type of paper?

1) What experience have you had that changed you?

2) What was happening in Los Angeles that led to the Rodney King riots?

3) Students at San Fernando High School should wear uniforms.

4) What was Los Angeles like in the 1800s?

5) Tell me about the main character Sonia Rodriguez. What does she look like and what are

her primary personality traits?

6) Is a tomato a fruit or a vegetable?

7) What is a mammal?

8) How do you make an omelet?

9) What are the most important events in John Lennon’s life?

10) What are the best ways to deal with pollution?

11) What was the main reason that we decided to bomb Hiroshima.

12) What is an expository essay?

13) The drinking age in California should be lowered to 18.

14) What are the similarities and differences between middle school and high school?

15) What things did Lindsay Lohan do that resulted in her loss of reputation?

16) Tell me about your most exciting day this summer.

17) What would be the best way to deal with the tardy problem at San Fernando High

School?

18) What are the primary social groups at this high school?

19) How does a cell phone work?

20) How are video games like movies? How are they different

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8A


9th Grade Position Paper Description

One of the major objectives of this course is learning how to write a position paper. This kind of essay allows the reader to consider a social problem both in terms of its seriousness and what ought – and ought not – to be done about it. These rhetorical objectives are accomplished as the paper procedes through the following three sections: The primary focus of this course will be the composition of a 10-15 page position paper on a topic pertaining to a significant social problem. It will be written as a class and divided into three major sections as follows:

Exposition (3-5 pages): the first purpose of this section is to explain to the reader what it is, exactly, that you’re writing about. The second purpose is to describe the seriousness of theis social problem in such a way that the reader will agree that something needs to be done about it.

Within this section, you might consider including information related to

Cause and Effect: in which you might explain to the reader WHY this problem developed and/or what some of the consequences of this problem are. You must be sure that these causes/effects are valid and that you not simply list things that happened before/after the event

This part of the paper will require you to do some research at the library, on the internet, etc. You’ll want to carefully record the sources of your information so that you can properly cite them in your paper. (We will follow the MLA guidelines in this class.)

Summary and Analysis (3-5 pages): As its name suggests, this section has two parts. like the Exposition part of the paper, this section also has two parts. In the first, you will describe approaches to dealing with the problem, and/or opinions people have for what ought to be done to address it, which you disagree with. Once you have summarized these approaches and/or ideas, your job in the second part of this section is to explain why you don’t like them.

Proposals (3-5 pages): once you’ve shown why current attitudes and/or approaches to dealing with the problem are unsatisfactory, you will propose what you think are better ideas and explain why you think they ought to be considered.

Within this section, you might consider including information related to

Process – that is, : in which you will explain a series of steps, perhaps telling the reader how to solve the problem by following certain steps or by explaining how something works.that might be taken to better address this problem. You’ll also want to pitch your idea in terms of various “selling points.”

Students in this class will be expected to compose the Summary & Analysis section and may be assigned the Exposition and/or Proposals section(s) as well. These sections will be written as three separate essays over the course of the semester. None of them needs to include an introduction or conclusion, however, as they will be joined together using sub-headings. You should plan to write the introduction and conclusion for the entire paper toward the end of the semester, once the three sections have been completed. Brainstorming and outlining as a class will precede the composition of each any part of the paper that is assigned. If you come to class regularly, you should have no trouble completing the assignment.

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The 3 Parts of a Position Paper

Part I: Exposition:

Explain the issue. Convince the reader that it’s a problem and that something must be done about it.

↓Part II: Summary and Analysis:

Describe approaches/opinions people have for dealing with the problem, and then explain why you disagree.

↓Part III: Proposals:

What do Present and support what you think are better solutions,approaches to dealing with the problem and why?

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5D


Annotating for Success: How to Read Critically

Rationale:Reading critically is about reading closely – looking for what is stated as well as what is implied. By doing so we can understand the author’s purpose as well as the way in which that purpose is expressed, i.e. the writer’s stylistic choices.

Five Close Reading Strategies: 1. Number the paragraphs2. Chunk the text3. Underline and circle….with a purpose4. Left Margin: What is the author SAYING?5. Right Margin: Dig deeper into the text

Connect:As you work with your text, consider all of the ways that you can connect with it. Here are some suggestions that will help you with your brainstorming.• Make connections to other parts of the book. Don’t be afraid to use quotes—just use MLA style.• Make connections to other visual and graphic material, such as movies; comics; news events; and books,

stories, plays, poems, and even to your life.Connect to world and engage yourself!!!

o Text to selfo Text to world

o Text to mediao Text to text

• For visual connections, include the artwork, photo, or drawing in the footnotes (don’t just describe it).

Annotate and Develop an Approach:• Vocabulary—define words or slang; make them real for us; explore why the author would have used those

words.• Underline, star, highlight, box, or circle words, phrases, and sentences.• Write brief comments in the margins: (LEFT versus RIGHT)

o Main idea of texto Rewrite, paraphrase, or summarize a particularly difficult parto Thoughts, observations, comments, or ideas that occur to youo Questions you have or things you may not understand o Do you agree/disagree

• Give the historical context of situations described.• Give an explanation of the text for clarity.• Give an analysis of what is happening in the text.• Do research on the Internet to see what others are saying about the text.• Challenge yourself: Find some literary criticism on the author or text

Develop an Approach: create different short hand and abbreviations for yourself. Here is a suggested set of markings you might use.

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Circle KEY CONCEPTS! Exclamation marks for IMPORTANT Question marks for those passages your don’t understand Note important issues, problems, events in story developmentP.O.V. Note the point of view of the writer Assump. Identify the assumptions the writer is making Respond to the writer; do not summarize or dis/agree; have a discussion about the content, assumptions and implications


Making the Grade: Ideas for Increasing the On-Time Graduation Rate at San Fernando High SchoolStudents Enrolled in Honors 9 and Honors 12 English Courses at SFHS March 1, 2013

Introduction: (1) For the past five years or so, America’s economy has suffered a serious decline. During this time

of high unemployment and prolonged joblessness, even those who have a high school degree have found it

difficult to find steady work. For those who lack this minimum educational requirement, securing

employment is much more of a challenge. Ironically, at a time when the percentage of American youth who

graduate high school should be increasing, it is actually moving in the opposite direction, especially in

California. Many ideas have been put forward to reverse the downward trend, but at least two of them –

paying youths to go to school and fining the parents of those who don’t – would likely only compound the

problem. Two approaches with a much greater chance of succeeding, at least with respect to the students in

danger of dropping out of San Fernando High School, would be to partner with local radio and television

station owners in the broadcast of public service announcements and to facilitate meetings between

successful high school seniors and their middle school counterparts.

An Epidemic of Early Exits (Exposition)

(2) According to the most recent information available, approximately 1.3 million American

teenagers drop out of school each year. This is the equivalent of approximately 7,200 per day (Wingert).

The seriousness of this problem can also be measured in terms of the percentage of high school students who

graduate on time. At last count, it was only 68.8% -- a number considerably lower than the rates of many

other economically developed countries. Denmark, Japan, Germany, and Finland, for example, have

graduation percentages of 96%, 93%, 92%, and 91%, respectively (OECD). Many Americans would likely

be surprised to learn that the United States, known around the world as a superpower, ranks only 18 th among

economically developed nations in terms of its high-school-graduation rate (NEA).

(3) Compared to other states, California occupies an even lower ranking relative to other states than

the US does among its peers. With approximately one in four students leaving school before graduation, it

holds the unenviable distinction of being 41st in the percentage of secondary students it graduates on time

(Blume). This number reflects a decrease over the last ten years and contrasts with the performance of 36

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states that succeeded in improving their on-time graduation rates (Education Week). Two in particular, New

York and Tennessee, actually had double-digit gains over the last decade (ibid).

(4) As bad as California is as a whole, the situation is even worse in Los Angeles, where nearly one

out of three teens gives up on school (Blume). Especially unsatisfactory is the performance of students in the

Los Angeles Unified School District (LAUSD), which graduates between 40 (Wingert) and 56 percent

(LAUSD School Report Card) of its students on time – depending, respectively, on whether independent or

district sources are used in calculating on-time graduation rates. The second-largest school district in the

United States, LAUSD is also the second worst in the nation in terms of this critically important measure

(Education Week). Each year, roughly 40,000 of its students make the decision to abandon their educations

(ibid). Compared to the New York City school district, which is twice its size, LAUSD graduates 14% fewer

students (ibid).

(5) Of particular concern to our class is the fact that San Fernando High School’s on-time graduation rate is

only slightly higher than that of LAUSD, the district it belongs to. For the 2011-12 school year, only 55% of its

students completed their high school education on time (LAUSD School Report Card). This means that out of 825

seniors who might have graduated, only 455 did, and that 370 are left to make their way in the world without the

piece of paper required of job applicants by the majority of employers and of would-be students by post-secondary

educational institutions.

(6) Another way to look at the problem is to consider how the percentage of on-time graduations has fared

over time. Whereas the National Center for Educational Statistics claims that there has been a 3% increase in this

rate between 1997 and 2007 (NCES), outside experts contend that the actual dropout rates have gotten much worse

over the past 40 years than what are officially reported (Heckman).

(7) Those who study this problem often discuss it in terms of demographics. When it comes to ethnicity,

researchers have found that there is a huge difference between the on-time graduation rates of whites and minorities,

with Asians being a notable exception. Indeed, the gap between some ethnic groups is as much as 40 to 50

percentage points (Alliance for Education). Asians are the most successful of all ethnic groups, graduating 89.6% of

their high school students on time (NEA). Not too far behind are non-Hispanic whites, whose rate in 2010 was 81%

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(ibid). Much less successful are Hispanics, African Americans, and Native Americans, whose rates are 56%, 54%,

and 51%, respectively (Education Week). That Hispanics are doing so poorly is obviously of special concern to us

inasmuch as this is the racial category that describes 97% of the students at SFHS. While not as wide, the difference

between genders is also significant. For example, whereas only 48% of African American males graduate on time,

59% of their female counterparts do. Similarly, 49% of Latino males finish school in four years compared to 58% of

Latina females who do (NEA).

(8) With further regard to demographics, a student’s socioeconomic status seems important as well. As a

matter of fact, a student raised in the wealthiest 25% of American households is seven times as likely to graduate

from high school on time as one who comes from the poorest 25% (Alliance for Education). This is another

significant statistic for us given that 87% of SFHS students qualify for Title One benefits. Where a student is raised

seems to matter too. According to recent statistics, only 58% of teens in cities graduate on time compared to 75% of

those in the suburbs (NEA). Although it is located in the San Fernando Valley, SFHS likely has more in common

with urban schools than suburban ones. An especially troubling fact is that fully half of all high school dropouts in

the nation attend one of only 2000 schools (ibid). Perhaps appropriately, these institutions are popularly known as

“dropout factories” (ibid).

(9) All of these numbers take on real significance when one considers the impact that dropping out of high

school has on the individuals who choose to do so. One huge effect is a higher rate of unemployment. Whereas a

dropout currently faces a 14.9% chance of not having a job, someone who finishes high school has a much lower

chance of being out of work: 10.3% (BLS). If this person graduated from college, the likelihood of their being

without work is only 5.4%, or one-third that of a dropout (ibid). Even with a little bit of college, a person faces only

a 9.2% chance of not being employed (ibid).

(10) The difficulty of finding a job is a situation poignantly described by one of the many SFHS dropouts we

interviewed for this project. “Jesus” is in his late twenties and has yet to move out of his parents’ home. As he

explains,

It’s been tough since I dropped out. Twelve years later, and I’m still livin’ at home. I’ve had a few jobs that I thought were gonna last, but none of them did. I lost the last one more than a year ago, and nobody’ll even talk to me about a job these days. First thing they ask for is a high school diploma. I got two kids, and they

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should be living with me and their moms in our own place – instead of with her family. Pretty soon, they’ll be old enough to know what’s up, and they’ll ask me why we gotta be living apart. That’s gonna hurt, for sure. A man’s supposed to provide for his family, and I can’t even give mine a place to live. How they gonna have respect for me when they figure that out? Hopefully, they’ll at least see what happens when you don’t finish school like me.

(11) Even when they are able to find a job, high school dropouts earn considerably less than those

who earn a high school diploma. On average, the former will earn $444 per week while the latter will take

home roughly two hundred dollars more in that amount of time (BLS). Assuming that this difference

persists throughout the dropout’s working years, he or she will earn about $260,000.00 less than the high

school graduate (Alliance for Education). As one would expect, the difference in earning potential is much

greater still between dropouts and those who earn a bachelor’s degree, the latter taking home an average of

$1058 per week. This difference is not at all insignificant when one considers that over a 40-year period, it

would equal $1,275,000.00.

(12) These disparities are obviously important when it comes to purchasing such essentials as a house and a

car. According to californiarealitycheck.com, a web site sponsored by the California Department of Education, one

would need to earn approximately $80,000.00 per year to maintain an average lifestyle in Los Angeles. This may

explain why nearly 40% of the homeless population consists of high school dropouts (Da Costa Nunez), whose

average gross annual wages total only $23,000.00. Compounding this problem is the fact that dropouts are half as

likely to find work that provides them with health care benefits (NCES). This is significant given that health care

costs the average American household approximately $15,000 a year (ibid), which is equal to two-thirds of the

average dropout’s annual income. Perhaps because they are unable to afford health care, high school dropouts are

“more likely to suffer from illness or disability and to die prematurely from cardiovascular disease, cancer, infection,

injury, and diabetes” than those with at least a high school diploma (NEA).

(13) Such circumstances may help explain why dropouts constitute such a disproportionate

percentage of our nation’s prison population. Currently, approximately 78% of all inmates either failed to

graduate from high school or earned an alternative diploma such as the GED (Heckman). Not only do the

incarcerated pay a great price in terms of the loss of their freedom, but society bears a huge expense in

administering federal, state, and municipal penal systems. According to one calculation, if the high school

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completion rate were increased by only 1% among those aged 20 to 60, the United States would save $1.4

billion annually in such costs (NEA). One can truly get a sense of how much society spends on the criminal

justice system when one considers that California spends $50,000.00 to house and feed a prisoner for a year

but only $8,000.00 annually to educate a K-12 student (Gollan).

(14) When lower tax payments and greater dependence on Welfare, Medicaid and Medicare are added to

these costs, the total effect on taxpayers is a burden of approximately $240,000.00 for each person who fails to earn

a high school diploma (NCES). To take but one category of high school dropouts, teenage mothers, if each had at

least graduated high school, the nation would save approximately $3.8 billion each year (NEA). Based on estimates

provided by the National Education Association, if each and every person who drops out in a single year had

graduated instead, the country would realize a savings of $46 billion in public health costs that wouldn’t have to be

paid. This number reflects the fact that dropouts enroll in programs like Medicaid at far greater rates than those who

earn a high school diploma. Whereas only eight percent of high school graduates (and only 1% of college graduates)

enroll in Medicaid, 25 percent of dropouts do so (ibid). Clearly, our taxes would be significantly lower if students

graduated and thus were able to better take care of themselves.

(15) Another economic consequence of there being so many Americans lacking a basic education is our

nation’s high unemployment rate. In spite of the fact that 13.9 million people are out of work in this country, the

number of jobs available in the manufacturing sector has increased from 98,000 in 2008 to 230,000 in 2011

(Bradford). The problem, employers say, is that companies can’t find suitable candidates to fill those positions

because of their lack of education and experience (ibid).

(16) Americans should also be concerned about the effects of the dropout problem on the health of our

political system. As Thomas Jefferson once wrote, “If a nation expects to be ignorant and free, in a state of

civilization, it expects what never was and never will be.” This statement reflects his well-known belief that an

informed electorate is essential to the survival of a democracy and his strong advocacy of a public education system

that is easily accessible to all. As he might well have predicted, today’s dropouts are much less likely to vote or to

involve themselves in civic activities. In the presidential election year of 2004, for example, Americans with a

college degree were three times as likely to vote as their fellow citizens who lacked a high school diploma (NEA).

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(17) A final sobering statistic about the dropout problem that should instill anyone who reads it with a real

sense of urgency about doing something to address it is the fact that the children of those who fail to graduate from

high school are more likely to drop out themselves. Unless we want this generation of dropouts to produce another

and that one produce yet another, we have to do a better job of making sure that our students earn their high school

diploma.

Why Carrots and Sticks Won’t Do the Trick (Summary and Analysis)

(18) One idea for dealing with the dropout problem that has gained some attention of late relies on

financial rewards and penalties. Chelsea High School in Boston is one institution that counts on the former

to keep kids in school. It deposits $25 in an account that can’t be accessed until graduation for each quarter

that a student has perfect attendance. A charter school in Illinois provides students with an even greater

incentive: $50 each week for each student who doesn’t miss any classes. This school is advised by Michael

Grady, St. Louis University professor of educational studies, who justifies the practice of paying kids on the

grounds that “students can’t learn if they’re not in class” (Miller). Proponents also point to studies such as

one conducted by the University of Southern California in the 1990s, which found that scores increase when

kids are paid. When researchers there offered 8th graders $1 for every correct answer they got on a national

math examination, they supposedly did 13% better (ibid). Education reformers have also taken note of the

success of students attending the Providence St. Mel School in West Chicago who not only graduate on time

but who go on to attend some of the nation’s most prestigious universities. Their successes – and the fact

that they were financially compensated for them – were documented in a film entitled The Providence Effect.

(19) Unfortunately for proponents of this idea, there are a number of serious problems with it.

As suggested by Richard Ryan, a professor of psychology at the University of Rochester, paying kids to go to school

might actually make the attendance problem worse, as children with communicable illnesses will feel pressured to

attend class – and thus spread whatever ailment they have – when they should stay home until they feel better

(Miller). Another occasion when it is unreasonable to expect children to attend school would be when they have

experienced a death in the family or when there is an emergency involving one or more of its members. With further

regard to a child’s family, it’s been noted that unscrupulous parents may take advantage of the financial-rewards

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approach to not only send their children to school when they should stay home – again, such as when they are ill –

but that they might keep the money that their children obtained for themselves (ibid).

(20) Another problem with this idea is that there is no guarantee that students will take their education

seriously just because they’re in school. Indeed, it’s very possible – if not likely – that those who don’t want to be in

class will engage in disruptive behavior that will make it difficult for those who do want to learn to do so. Schools

that pay their students for merely showing up may thus compound the problem of students not being sufficiently

educated.

(21) Critics of what might be called the “cash-for-class” approach also contend that it undermines a central

mission of the public education system, which is to instill children with morals and values that most members of

society subscribe to. One such belief is that education is something that should be pursued throughout one’s life for

its own sake and for the sake of our democratic society, which benefits from having a well-educated electorate.

Paying kids to go to school would go against these important precepts in that it would discourage youth from

pursuing other worthwhile objectives unless they receive an immediate financial reward, and because it will weaken

their sense of obligation to contribute to the greater good. In essence, it amounts to a substitution of bribery for the

recognition of intrinsic rewards that benefit both themselves and others. One can only wonder how many students

will decide not to attend college because they’re not immediately compensated for doing so.

(22) Something else that American students should be taught is that, by virtue of their being provided with a

free education all the way through twelfth grade, they are much more fortunate than many millions – if not billions –

of young people in other parts of the world. If they were aware, for example, that girls in countries like Afghanistan

were until recently denied any education at all and that in many other countries only those children whose parents

can afford to pay have access to formal schooling beyond the elementary grades, they might be more appreciative of

the opportunity they have to better themselves through education here. Paying American kids to go to school would

certainly be viewed critically by those who are systematically denied an education in other countries. Negative

perceptions would also likely be generated within the United States if it were only the urban poor, who have the

highest dropout rates, who were compensated for going to school. As others have suggested, it might reinforce the

stereotype that poor communities don’t value education for its own sake (Miller).

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(23) From a much more practical and local point of view, paying kids to go to school is something that

LAUSD, at least, most certainly cannot afford to do. If it were to adopt the Chelsea High School model and pay its

students $25 for each quarter of perfect attendance from 9th grade on, it could potentially need to come up with $11.5

million annually, assuming that all of the approximately 58,000 students that should be graduating each year never

missed any classes. Assuming an average teacher salary of $60,000, the district would have to eliminate nearly 200

teaching positions if it implemented this plan, which works out to about three per high school, where classes are

already notoriously overcrowded. For the 2011-12 school year, LAUSD already has a $408 million deficit and is

seriously considering shortening the school year by a week in order to stay within its budget. At such a time, it is

inconceivable that the district would seriously consider adding to its financial woes in this manner.

(24) In contrast to a system of financial rewards, some would-be reformers believe that our dropout problem

could be successfully addressed by fining the parents of students who are chronically truant, especially those who

ignore warnings or offers of services like counseling and tutoring. In nearby Orange Country, police arrested a

number of such parents last year and prosecutors there succeeded in convincing a judge to find them guilty of

contributing to the delinquency of a minor, for which they were fined $2500.00 and faced a possible one-year prison

sentence (Hardesty). Proponents of this approach contend that parents should be held responsible for the behavior of

their children, and that they should pay a stiff price if their children break the law. They further maintain that once

they see that the courts are serious about holding their parents accountable in this manner, students will attend school

more regularly inasmuch as they won’t want their parents to suffer on their account.

(25) While no one would deny that parents are responsible for teaching their children right from wrong, it is

naive to suggest that they can always control them. This is particularly true of parents who work long hours and who

thus have fewer opportunities to meaningfully interact with their children – or even to gain awareness that their

students are skipping school. It also ignores the unfortunate reality that some children would like nothing more than

to get their parents in trouble and may thus see this type of law enforcement as an opportunity they can take

advantage of to satisfy such desires. There is also the problem of what to do with the children of single parents who

would be left to fend for themselves if their parents were taken away. The penalty is too severe, moreover, given

that $2500.00 is more than 10% of the nation’s official poverty rate for a family of four. Finally, it goes against

18


fundamental legal principles to punish someone for the crimes committed by another. If one were to extend the logic

employed by proponents of this plan, parents could be punished for any crime committed by their children.

PSAs and Mentor Days (proposal)

(26) Given the many problems inherent in the financial-rewards-and-penalties approach, it’s clear that a

much different way of dealing with the dropout crisis must be found. While plans for dealing with the problem as it

exists nationally are certainly needed, this paper’s primary focus is on addressing the situation facing the

communities served by SFHS.

(27) Clearly, whatever idea one puts forward must address the fundamental reasons that students

have for making the decision to abandon their education. According to a number of educational experts, a

student’s failure to graduate from 9th grade with his or her peers is a major factor in his or her ultimate

decision to drop out (National High School Center). This was confirmed by Ms. Garcia, the Dropout

Coordinator for the Los Angeles Unified School District, who was interviewed by our class in December,

2011. A survey we conducted of nearly three hundred students, teachers, and adults in the community

suggested some reasons as to why this might be the case. These include: a sense of hopelessness that

students who are held back experience when they realize how much make-up work is required to be

promoted; a sense that graduating from high school won’t make that much difference in determining whether

a student will succeed or not; and the temptation – or perceived need – to work.

(28) A second oft-stated reason is a lack of parental support, which the American Psychological Association

regards as “one of the four prominent risk factors determining the likelihood of dropping out” (2011). This opinion

was also verified by Ms. Garcia when she visited with our class, and is further supported by the research we

conducted in our survey, wherein approximately 70% of respondents agreed that the failure of parents to involve

themselves in the educational experience of their children is a major problem in this community.

(29) An idea for dealing with the first cause would be for SFHS students to visit middle-school classrooms to

talk to students there about how serious the drop-out problem is at our school. This means that members of our class

would be visiting the campuses of Charles Maclay Middle School, San Fernando Middle School, and Pacoima

Middle School to share information we have gathered about how many SFHS students drop out and what the

19


negative consequences are of doing so. We would also discuss the reasons we’ve become familiar with for why so

many students here don’t make it, such as the fact that freshman are unaccustomed to not being socially promoted;

the likelihood that they’ll find their classes to be much more challenging; and the possibility that they won’t feel a

sense of belonging. We would follow this discussion up with advice about how these middle school students might

more successfully negotiate their way through the many challenges and temptations they’ll face in high school. This

would include mention of such things as after-school tutoring; clubs and organizations; the Project Grad and Impact

programs; our Teen Clinic; and college class offerings.

(30) In order to execute our plan, it will be necessary to obtain permission from the administrators at all of

the schools involved, as well as from the teachers whose classrooms will be impacted. This can be accomplished by

providing all of the parties concerned with a copy of our position paper, as well as an outline of what we intend to

discuss, along with a formal letter of request. The likelihood of succeeding in this endeavor is enhanced by the fact

that many of us are on good terms with some of the individuals whose permission we need. In addition, we will

need to prepare a PowerPoint presentation and a short video, as well as arrange for transportation.

(31) This proposal has a number of positive aspects to recommend it. First, its only cost is that of

transporting the presenters by school bus, which would be negligible. It is also a very simple plan to put into effect,

inasmuch as we’ve already thoroughly researched this topic and have composed a position paper on it. It is a logical

approach, moreover, since there is ample evidence supporting the idea that teens are more apt to take advice from

their peers than from adults. Indeed, peer mentoring, of which this is certainly an example, is touted in such

academic publications as The Journal of Primary Prevention (Dennison). Experts also support the idea of speaking

with at-risk students well before they begin attending high school (National High School Center). This proposal has

additional benefits not directly related to the drop-out problem as well. These would include providing middle

school teachers with a better idea of what sorts of things are required of high school students; satisfying service-

learning requirements for graduation; and enhancing the quality of our college- and employment applications.

(32) With respect to the lack of parental support, we propose to invite local radio and television station

owners and managers – as well as outdoor advertising companies – to broadcast public service announcements

urging parents in our community to get more involved in the education of their children, in general, and to do all

20


they can to ensure that their children graduate from high school, in particular. This will necessitate that we write

formal letters of request, as well as notify local newspapers of our intention so that they can help us pressure these

parties into helping us put our plan into action. Once we succeed in establishing a partnership, we hope to be

integrally involved in composing the scripts that will be used – and perhaps even taking part in their recording and

production.

(33) As bold as this approach may seem, its cost to all parties is minimal. Time is all that we will have to

donate, and station owners and advertisers can realize a substantial tax benefit. These parties will also have the

opportunity to satisfy the requirement that they engage in public service in exchange for being able to use public

airwaves. Another feature that makes this plan attractive is that it is more likely to succeed than current methods of

communicating with parents. Although SFHS has a Parent Center which regularly sponsors events intended to

facilitate communication with parents, their success in getting parents to participate has been very limited. Similar

events that have been sponsored by SFHS’s respective Small Learning Communities have also been largely

unsuccessful. The reason most often given for why parents don’t attend these events is that they are working or

commuting to or from work. If the message that we want to communicate to them is broadcast over the airwaves or

posted on local billboards, it’s highly likely that we’ll be successful in overcoming such obstacles.

Conclusion: (34) As this essay has hopefully made plain, a viable approach to dealing with the high school

dropout problem – at least as it exists in the San Fernando/Pacoima community – would be to take advantage

of existing resources to have local broadcasters produce and send out public service announcements

reminding parents of the role they play in ensuring that the youth of this area take their education seriously.

Coupled with this is the recommendation that those SFHS students who are succeeding visit those who will

soon embark upon their high school careers and advise them about how to overcome the many challenges

they are likely to face. While the idea of paying kids to go to school or arresting the parents of those students

who don’t may be well-intentioned, they are unfeasible at the very least and would likely create more

problems. Given how serious the problem of students abandoning their education is – again, especially in

this community – it is imperative that all of those who can do something about it join with us to do so. No

21


one is immune from the detrimental effects this problem poses; therefore, no one should think they have no

role to play in attempting to solve it.

22


Paragraph-by-Paragraph Summary of High School Dropout Paper

Compare the numbered statements below with those you composed and mark yours as follows

+ your summary is essentially the same

~ your summary is similar, but there are some differences

-- your summary is very different

1 Introduction: Author suggests two approaches to deal with SFHS dropout problem.2 Presents statistics of dropout rates around the world.3 States that California has higher dropout rates than other states in the U.S.4 Notes that the dropout problem is worse in LAUSD schools.5 Presents on-time graduation rates specifically in SFHS.6 Suggests actual dropout rate have become worse in the last 40 years than officially reported.7 Describes the problem in terms of demographics (ethnicity).8 Continues to describe the problem in terms of demographics (social economic status).9 Explains the correlation between high school dropouts and a higher rate of unemployment.10 Quotes the opinion of a SHFS dropout.11 Suggests that high school dropouts earn significantly less than those who earn a high school

diploma.12 Suggest that approximately $80,000 a year is needed to maintain an average life style in LA.13 Notes that high school dropouts constitute a high percentage of our nation’s prison population.14 States that most dropouts make use of public assistance, which is a burden to tax payers.15 Explores reasons why employers cannot find suitable candidates making the unemployment rate

go higher.16 Suggests that Americans should be concerned with the effect of the dropout problems on our

political system.17 Suggests that to avoid generations of dropouts, we must ensure that our students earn a high

school diploma.18 Paragraph articulates potential solution to pay students to attend class.19 The difficulties with paying students to attend class: increase in illness transmission, Not taking

into account deaths in the family, and family emergencies.20 Additional difficulties with paying for students, students will come but not be engaged and can be

disruptive.21 Additional criticism for paying students to attend class is that it weakens morality and values that

students should value education for its own merits, lack of engagement in lifelong learning and college because they won’t be paid for it immediately.

22 This paragraph encourages students to value their education, because students all over the world either do not have access to, or have to pay for their education. Additionally it contributes to negative perceptions around the world. As well as other Americans if only the poor students are paid to attend class.

23 Illustrates another difficulty with paying students to attend class, and that is LAUSD’s budget and the likelihood of having to lay off teachers in order to pay students. That combined with the increase in class sizes makes it an unlikely solution.

24 A new solution is presented, fining the parents of chronically truant students. This would hold parents legally accountable for the behavior of their children. It has been attempted in Orange County.

23

5F


25 This paragraph discusses the difficulties with fining parents. It does not take into consideration parents that work long hours, the kids that want to punish their parents, and the unfairness of punishing someone for the “crimes” of another.

26 Proposes that efforts to deal with dropout should focus on addressing the situation facing the communities served by SFHS

27 Cites Ms. Garcia, dropout coordinator of LAUSD, to indicate the reasons why students dropout. These include: a sense of hopelessness when student’s realize the amount of work necessary to graduate; an understanding that high school will not do much for them; and the temptation to earn money.

28 Presents another reason why students dropout and that is lack of parental support and the failure of parents to involve themselves in their child’s educational experience.

29 Recommends visiting middle school campuses to educate students on the risks of dropping out and advising them not to.

30 Details how the proposal is executed through administrative permission and parental involvement.31 This outlines the positive aspects of the proposal such as mentoring, expert advice, and teacher

support for making students, college and career ready.32 The plan proposes to use radio communication to increase parental involvement creating a

stronger partnership between schools and parents.33 Aside from the challenge of time management, the plan is attractive because of low cost.34 The conclusion restates advantages of the approach to dealing with the high school dropout

problem, highlights that it affects us all, and refutes unrealistic plans.

24


Vocabulary Assessment: High School Dropout PaperPlease effectively use the seven strategies to determine synonyms for the following vocabulary words.

1. Decline2. Prolonged3. Ironically4. Facilitate5. Approximately6. Respectively7. Relative8. Unenviable9. Distinction10. Critically11. Demographics12. Ethnicity13. Minorities *14. Inasmuch15. Whereas16. Socioeconomic

status17. Poignantly18. Alliance19. Potential20. Disparities21. Consists22. Prematurely23. Constitute24. Disproportionate25. Alternative26. Administering27. Civilization28. Electorate29. Essential30. Advocacy31. Civic32. Sobering33. Instill

34. Incentive35. Justifies36. On the grounds37. Proponents38. Conducted39. Prestigious40. Compensated41. Communicable42. Ailment43. Unscrupulous44. Compound45. Morals46. Subscribe47. Precepts48. Intrinsic49. Virtue50. Systematically51. Reinforce52. Implemented53. Notoriously54. Chronically55. Prosecutors56. Delinquency57. Naïve

58. Perceived

59. Prominent

60. Unaccustomed

61. Aspects

25

5G


62. Necessitate

63. Viable

64. Embark

65. Unfeasible

66. Immune

26


Sample Anecdote and Body Paragraphs from Child Abuse Position Paper

Directions: identify at least one coherence device in each sentence following the anecdote that connects an idea in that sentence with an idea(s) in either the sentence that precedes or follows it. Use the usual symbols to identify the type of coherence device used and draw lines to indicate which main idea(s) they connect to.

She knows she should be studying for the final she has in biology tomorrow, working on the essay due Friday for

her English class, or working on her math problems. She really wants to go to college and knows that if she doesn’t get

her schoolwork done and her grades slip, her dream of a career in medicine might never be realized. But still she sits,

watching the blood ooze in neat lines that follow the razor blade she’s slowly pulled across the soft skin of her wrist. The

volume on her ipod is turned up high, and she’s vaguely aware that the female vocalist is singing about problems in her

relationship with guys – and she briefly thinks about how she suddenly ended her relationship with her boyfriend – but the

sound that really fills her head is that of her mother’s voice, repeated over and over; “it couldn’t have happened the way

you said it did. Not your uncle. He would never touch any of you girls. Stop imagining things and focus on your

studies.” She had always had a close relationship with her mother, but now things were different. She wonders, “if my

mom won’t believe me, who will? What’s the point ...?”

This brief depiction of a girl’s isolation is based on actual circumstances faced by a student at San Fernando High

School (SFHS). Unfortunately, it is not an isolated case. According to a survey of 255 students, teachers, and residents of

the San Fernando/Pacoima area, which our class conducted in August, 2005, child abuse in this community occurs with

alarming frequency. When asked if they personally knew of any minor who had been sexually, physically, or

psychologically abused, 55% of our respondents answered in the affirmative, and, in many cases, reported that they knew

of at least several individuals who had. An even higher number, 61%, agreed that child abuse is a serious problem in this

area; of these, 34% said that they strongly agree that it is. These troubling findings are supported by the information

supplied by our school nurse, who says that 50 – 60% of the cases she sees are related to child abuse. (Smith, 2005)

As bad as these numbers are, they may be even higher given that abused children are often reluctant or unable to

tell anyone about what happened to them.

27

6A


Four Qualities of a Well Written Paragraph (The 4Qs)

simple ideas that can greatly improve the clarity of your writing

1. Unity: everything in paragraph clearly relates to main idea(s) in topic sentence

2. Order: all ideas in paragraph are logically arranged (chronologically, spatially, from general to specific, etc)

Spatially: items are arranged according to their physical position or relationships. In describing a shelf or desk, I might describe items on the left first, and then move gradually toward the right.

3. Completeness: all main ideas in topic sentence are discussed in the paragraph

4. Coherence: all the ideas in a paragraph flow smoothly from one sentence to the next, as well as from one paragraph to the next.

Coherence Devices: (just remember “SPORT”)S synonym: words with the same meaning

P pronoun: a word that replaces a noun (desk = it)

O old-new pattern: begin each sentence with a reference to what previous sentence was about

1. O …………………... N2. O ………………….. N

3. O ……………………. N

R repetition (of key words and phrases)

T transition words and phrases: they tell readers about how what you’re going to write next is related to what you’ve already written. For example: using such as before you give an example; using to put it another way, … to clarify something you’ve just written

28

6B


Sample Paragraph with Coherence Problems

1Self injury is the general term used to describe self-inflicted pain or injury on oneself. 2Most

commonly, this is the form of cutting or burning, but there are many other forms of self-injury. 3Self injury is

often linked to depression and is simply expressed. 4For many people, self injury or self mutilation is not a

widely recognized habit. 5This can make it extremely difficult to find the support and help that is so essential

for self injurers.

Coherence Devices Revealed

I have a friend named Bill. He drives trucks for a living. While hauling cargo from state to state, he often stops

to take pictures. Many of his photos are of lakes and forests. An especially good one Bill took was of Crater

Lake in Wasatch National Park. It showed …

29

6C

7B


Editing with 4Qs in Mind

1. Example of a lack of UNITY

With its seaside beaches, snowcapped mountains, and extensive forests, Oregon is an ideal place to live. Its magnificent forests alone, covering more than 30 million acres, make it a natural paradise. The National Park Service protects 17 million acres in national forests, but the rest is used for Oregon’s lumber industry. Loggers “harvest” trees with chain saws and then send their “crop” to the mill on trucks. Many sawmills that used to employ 100 or more people are now closed because of the decline in the lumber business. But loggers are not like steelworkers. They don’t go on relief and wait for their factory to reopen. Self-reliant, eccentric, and impatient, loggers simply move to other parts of the country to look for work.

Option 1: change topic sentence. With its seaside beaches, snowcapped mountains, and extensive forests, Oregon is an ideal place to live, although residents employed in one of its outdoor industries are increasing leaving the state.

Option 2: remove part of paragraph not clearly related to topic sentence. With its seaside beaches, snowcapped mountains, and extensive forests, Oregon is an ideal place to live. Its magnificent forests alone, covering more than 30 million acres, make it a natural paradise. The National Park Service protects 17 million acres in national forests, but the rest is used for Oregon’s lumber industry. Add more positive information about forests (beaches or mountains).

2. Example of a lack of COHERENCE

My favorite movie is Cinderella. It’s about a young girl who is mistreated by her stepmother. She

makes Cinderella do all the chores in the house. Her stepsisters take advantage of Cinderella as well.

Cinderella and her stepsisters all want to marry the Prince. In the end, he marries Cinderella and they live

happily ever after.

Problem: expectation after 4th sentence is that an explanation of how Cinderella’s stepsisters take advantage of her would come next

3. Example of excellent UNITY, ORDER, COMPLETENESS, and COHERENCE

My favorite band is The Ramones. What I like so much about them is their originality. Back in the

early 1970s, music was mostly soft or all the same, but The Ramones exploded with a new type of music called

Punk. This punk music was raw, ruthless, and brutally honest. Songs such as “Now I Wanna Sniff Some

Glue”, “Beat on the Brat”, “53rd and 3rd”, “Chainsaw”, and “Blitzkrieg Bop” surprised the world with lyrics

about drug abuse, beating on rich kids, prostitution on the streets, serial killers, and gang warfare.

30

6D


Directions1. Identify each of the following Coherence devices using different colors:

Coherence Devices: (“SPORT”)S synonym (yellow)P pronoun (green)O old-new pattern (blue)R repetition of key words (orange)T transition words and phrases (pink)

2. Discuss within your groups and write why each is important in creating a fluid essay.

Gun Violence Paragraphs Glossary Tactic: strategy Analogy: comparison Inasmuch as: since; because (in as much as I didn’t get much sleep, I can’t concentrate today) Crucial: critical; very important Distinctions: differences Respective: in parallel order (Sara and George like volleyball and basketball, respectively) Respects: ways; areas; aspects Presumption of innocence: assuming someone is not guilty of a crime unless proven otherwise Detrimental: harmful Permeability: if something is permeable, objects can pass through it Perimeter: boundary; border Proliferation: the spread of something from one area to another Moreover: in addition Obsolete: useless Congregation: group of people Idle: not doing anything Potentially: possibly Implement: put into practice Unintentionally: accidentally Horde: group of people Bent on: wanting to Render: provide or give (a service, help, etc.); cause to be or become; make Counterproductive: does the opposite of what you want it to do Exacerbate: to make something worse

31


Summary and Analysis Sample

One proposal for reducing the level of gun-related violence in schools is to

require that all students pass through a metal detector upon entering school grounds. The

reasoning behind this suggestion is that the same tactic has proven successful in nearly

eliminating gun violence in prisons and airports. Unfortunately, the comparison of public schools

to prisons and airports is a false analogy, inasmuch as it ignores some crucial distinctions

between their respective populations. First of all, although schools may resemble prisons in

certain respects, students are not convicted criminals and should not be treated as such. Because

they haven’t had to surrender their constitutional rights – as criminals do – they are entitled to a

presumption of innocence until or unless proven guilty. Requiring them to pass through a metal

detector every day turns this fundamental principle on its head since students are forced to prove

their innocence every day they come to school. It may further have detrimental psychological

effect. Research has shown that people take on the characteristics of social groups others tell

them they possess. In other words, it’s possible that good students may turn bad if they’re treated

as criminals.

Another problem with this proposal is that it doesn’t consider the permeability of a

school’s perimeter, particularly its fences. Installing metal detectors at the front gate won’t

prevent students from passing guns over, under, and even through a fence. The proliferation of

plastic guns, moreover, renders metal detectors somewhat obsolete. The recent shooting death at

a high school in South Central was accomplished with one such plastic weapon that had been

taken through a metal detector.

Finally, this proposal will result in the daily formation of large and slow-moving

congregations of idle students – a potentially dangerous situation in and of itself. Rather than

reducing the potential for violent activity, schools that implement this proposal may

unintentionally create a new and potentially more deadly environment. One need only consider

how inviting a target such a horde of students would be to a drive-by shooter or anyone bent on

committing mass murder. This proposal is not only counterproductive; therefore, it may actually

exacerbate the problem of school shootings.

32


Transition Words and PhrasesIllustration/

ExampleContrast Addition Time Similarity/

ComparisonEmphasis Consequent/

ResultSummary Suggestion

Thus For example For instance Namely To illustrate In other

words In particular Specifically Such as As an

illustration In particular Especially To explain To list To enumerate In detail As a result In fact In conclusion On the whole

On the contrary Contrarily Notwithstanding Nevertheless In spite of In contrast Yet On one hand On the other

hand Rather Nor Conversely At the same time While Otherwise Whereas Differing from Less important Even though Still Than Unless In place of

In addition to Furthermore Moreover Besides Than Also Another Equally

important Again Further As well as Next Likewise Similarly In fact As a result Consequently In the same

way Therefore Too

AfterBeforeThenOnceAt firstAt lastAt lengthFormerlyMost importantLaterOrdinarilyTo begin withAfterwardsGenerally In order toSubsequentlyPreviously In the meantime ImmediatelyEventuallyConcurrentlySimultaneously

SimilarlyLikewise In like fashion In a like

mannerAnalogous toEquallyAnother In addition toMoreoverTooFurtherFurthermore In the same

fashion In generalAs ifAsAlsoAgainBesidesEqually

importantFor instanceAs an exampleAs thoughAs much asAs well as Inasmuch

Above all IndeedTrulyOf courseCertainlySurely In fact In truthAgainBesidesAlsoFurthermore In additionProvided thatMore

importantOf less

importanceEqually

important

ConsequentlyAccordinglyHenceThusThereforeFor this reasonWith the result

thatSinceDue toAs a resultIn other wordsAlthoughAt any rateAt leastGranted thatWhile it may be

trueIn spite ofOf courseProvided thatUnfortunatelyConsequentlyFortunatelyIn any case

ThereforeFinallyConsequentlyThus In short In conclusion In briefAs a resultAccordinglyAll in allOn the whole In any event In other wordsTo sum upSpecifically In factFor instance

For this purpose

To this end With this in

mind Therefore

33

7A


Sample Position Paper: Helping the Homeless

(1) On a chilly February afternoon, an old man sits sleeping on the sidewalk outside a New

York hotel while the lunchtime crowd shuffles by. At the man’s foot is a sign which reads: “Won’t you

help me? I’m cold and homeless and lonely. God Bless You” (Chambers 11). Imagine, if you can, the

life this man leads. He probably spends his days alone on the street begging for handouts, and his nights

searching for shelter from the cold. He has no job, no friends, and nowhere to turn. Although most

Americans would like to believe that cases like this are rare, the National Coalition for the Homeless

estimates that as many as 3 million citizens of our country share this man’s lifestyle (Tucker 34). Who

are these people we call “the homeless,” and what are the reasons for their predicament?

(2) According to Pastor Walker, the director of the Gospel Missions Shelter in Sioux City,

Iowa, most of the homeless are unemployed males, and from 40 to 60 percent have alcohol or drug-

related problems. Walker also points out, however, that the image of the “typical” homeless person is

changing. He says, for instance, that the average age of the homeless has dropped from fifty-five to thirty

in the last ten years (Walker interview). National studies also show that America’s homeless population

is changing. A recent study by the U.S. Conference of Mayors, for example, found that one third of the

homeless population consists of families with small children, and 22 percent of the homeless have full- or

part-time jobs (Matthews 57). Statistics seem to show that more and more of the homeless are entire

families who have simply become the victims of economic hardship.

(3) Why are these people still on the streets, despite the billions of dollars that are spent on the

homeless each year? Some blame the national housing shortage, pointing out that there are not enough

homes to fill the country’s need for shelter (Marcuse 426). Further study of the problem, however,

suggests that government programs, which fall into several categories, are to blame. Some are handout

programs designed to provide food or clothing to all of the needy, not just the homeless. An example of

34

8C


this type of program is the Temporary Emergency Food Assistance Program, created by the federal

government in 1991 to make surplus agricultural products available to those in need. Other programs,

such as the experimental voucher program and the rent-control system, are intended to provide housing

for low-income families that need shelter. Despite the good intentions behind these programs, however,

none of them have provided sufficient help for the homeless.

(4) Why have these programs been ineffective in cutting down on homelessness? In some

cases, the answer is that the programs are not designed to fit the special needs of the homeless. It was

estimated in October of 1996, for instance, that 99 percent of the food supplied by the Temporary

Emergency Assistance Program had gone to those who were not homeless. The reason? As Anna

Kondratas of the Department of Agriculture says, “When you’re homeless, you don’t carry around a five-

pound block of cheese”(qtd. in Whitman 34). Food programs like these are valuable only to those who

already have a place to store and prepare the food they are given. The homeless, therefore, are unable to

take full advantage of these programs.

(5) Not all programs set up to make housing available to those with low incomes have been

effective, either. An example is the voucher system, a federal program created in 2003, which allows

low-income families to live wherever they can find housing, regardless of cost. The only requirement is

that families must pay at least 30 percent of their incomes in rent. Although this system has been

successful in finding shelter for some needy families, it is not a long term solution to homelessness. One

problem is that most families who use the voucher system pay a lower percent of their income for rent

than those who rent apartments on their own. Therefore, a family could “raise” its income simply by

becoming “homeless”(Coulson 16). The second problem with the program is that it needs a much greater

housing supply to be effective. Says Democratic Congressman Thomas Downey of Long Island, “The

35


voucher system would make sense if there were housing, but there is just not enough. It doesn’t in any

way address the problem” (qtd. in Hull 23).

(6) The program that has had the worst results, however, is the rent-control system, which now

covers approximately 12 percent of America’s housing. Rent control is a program set up by local

governments to limit the amount of rent that a landlord can charge his tenants. It dates back to World War

II, when New York tenants became worried about rent increases following the war. In 1947, these tenants

persuaded politicians to extend the rent limits to permanent houseing. Since that time, nine states and

many major cities, such as Los Angeles and Washington, D.C., have adopted rent-control policies

(Fleetwood 19).

(7) At first glance, it would appear that rent control should benefit the homeless, making sure

that low-rent housing is available. The problem is that most of this housing is rented by those in the

middle and upper class. Most of these tenants like living in these cheaper apartments and do not plan to

move. This results in a condition known as “housing gridlock,” in which no one moves out of the low-

rent housing. Seymour Durst, a developer-philosopher from Manhattan, describes the situation this way:

“We’ve got plenty of low-income housing in New York. We’ve just got upper-income people living in it”

(qtd. in Tucker 43).

(8) This situation has had a drastic effect on the poor of New York City. Unless they can find

a rent-controlled apartment, they are forced into housing at middle-to-upper-income prices. Some

estimate that this means these people are paying 20 to 100 percent more for housing than they would have

without the rent-control program. (“Then There’s Rent”) Those who can’t afford these higher rent

payments are often left without a place to live. Such abuses of the rent-control program are contributing

to the problem of homelessness rather than fixing it.

36


(9) Throughout the nation, rent control has had effects similar to those in New York.

According to William Tucker, a writer who has done a great deal of research on the subject, rent control

adds to the number of homeless a city will have, regardless of location. For example, homelessness in

Santa Monica, California, is so common that the city is called “The Homeless Capital of the West Coast.”

The only thing that makes this city different from others in the same area is its extremely strict rent-

control policy. Other cities in Tucker’s study that have rent-control programs also have a much higher

rate of homelessness than the national average. In fact, Tucker reports that where rent control is

practiced, homelessness is 250 percent greater than in cities without rent control (41).

(10) Since these government programs have not solved the problem of homelessness, what

should be done instead? There is no single answer to this question, but the most promising solution

consists of three steps. First of all, the federal government must accept responsibility for providing shelter

for the homeless. During the Bush administration, the federal government attempted to shift this burden

to state and local governments by slashing federal funds for housing. Between the years of 2001 and

2007, Bush cut the housing budget from $30 billion to $7.3 billion, expecting local governments and

private contributions to make up the difference (Matthews 58). Unfortunately, Bush’s plan has not

worked as well as he expected. In New York City, for instance, only $500 million has been spent on the

homeless since the cutbacks, while the need has been estimated at $12.5 billion (Chambers 11).

(11) The decrease in funds is only half the problem; there has also been a major drop in housing

production. Only 60,000 new housing units have been created in New York during the past three years,

compared to 265,000 between the years 2000 and 2003. Many other cities have experienced similar

cutbacks. In addition, some of the federal housing units built in the 1990’s will soon be free from the rent

restrictions placed on them at that time. The result will probably be a substantial raise in rent, which will

put much of the current low income housing out of the reach of the poor (Matthews 57-58). In order to

37


avoid the drastic effects that these low rent housing shortages could cause, more housing must be created

immediately. According to community groups, renewed federal support will be necessary to accomplish

this task (Hull 22).

(12) A second step necessary for helping the homeless is making sure that the proper type of

housing is available. According to Peter Marcuse, a professor of urban planning at Columbia University,

shelter for the homeless falls into three categories. The first and simplest type is the soup kitchen, a

temporary emergency shelter that provides food and, sometimes, a place to sleep. Shelters of this type are

especially important in places where little food is available or weather conditions are unfavorable. The

second type of housing is the transitional shelter, which also provides housing only temporarily.

Transitional housing is unique, however, in that it provides job counseling and other social services,

which are intended to help the homeless rejoin society. The third type of shelter is permanent housing,

the type of shelter most likely to bring about an end to homelessness (426). Permanent shelter could be

provided by constructing low cost, prefabricated housing modules, or by renovating buildings that no one

presently lives in (Coulson 16). Unfortunately, most current housing programs rely on temporary soup

kitchens, as they are the least expensive to build and maintain. Although soup kitchens have an important

role to play, more transitional and permanent housing will be necessary for the homeless to fully readjust

to society.

(13) The final step to ending homeless is forming an organization that will check to see that

shelter residents are satisfied with their facilities and surroundings. This function should be coupled with

psychiatric care for those who are not yet ready to rejoin society. Studies have shown that neglecting the

personal care of the homeless often makes all other efforts to help them useless. These people often

return to living on the streets unless they are offered some type of support group (Whitman 27). This

38


check-up work could be done either by a government agency or by one of the existing social groups. This

third step must be included in any plan intended to end homelessness.

(14) When we talk about “ending” homelessness, however, we must remember that it is a

problem that will never be truly eliminated. There will always be those who refuse any help offered to

them, the ones who prize their “free” lifestyle above personal comfort. While we must respect the rights

of such people, we cannot use them as an excuse to do nothing about the homeless. Most people living on

the streets are there, not by choice, but because they have no alternative. It is these people that we must

try to help immediately, with the support of the federal government. If we begin now, we may be able to

make homelessness simply a matter of choice.

Works Cited

Chambers, Rick. “No Place to Lay Their Heads.” The Church Herald 16 Sept. 2008: 9-11.

Coulson, C. “The $137,000 Slum.” The New Republic 19 Jan. 2008: 15-16.

Fleetwood, Blake. “There’s Nothing Liberal about Rent Control.” The Washington Monthly

June 2006: 19-23.

Hull, Jennifer. “Building from the Bottom Up.” Time 9 Feb. 2007: 22-23.

Marcuse, Peter. “Why Are They Homeless?” The Nation 4 Apr. 2007: 426-29.

Matthews, Tom. “What Can Be Done?” Newsweek 21 Mar. 2008: 57-58.

“Then There’s Rent Control.” The New Republic 11 Apr. 2008: 22.

Tucker, William. “Where Do the Homeless Come From?” National Review 26 Sept. 2007: 32- 43.

Walker, Harry. Personal Interview. 20 Dec. 2008.

Whitman, David. “Hope for the Homeless.” U.S. News and World Report 29 Feb. 2008: 26-36.

39


Identifying Rhetorical Methods of Development in “Helping the Homeless”

I. In the space below, identify the rhetorical method(s) of development used in each of the 14 paragraphs in this essay, as well as the main point they seem to be supporting. (Your choices are limited to definition, exposition, summary (of ideas the author disagrees with), analysis (reasons for her disagreement with these ideas), and proposals.) For paragraph 14, you may simply write “conclusion” but you should also specify any rhetorical objectives or strategies you can.

1. _____________________________________________________________________________________

2. ____________________________________________________________________________________

3. ____________________________________________________________________________________

4. ____________________________________________________________________________________

5. ____________________________________________________________________________________

6. ____________________________________________________________________________________

7. ____________________________________________________________________________________

8. ____________________________________________________________________________________

9. ____________________________________________________________________________________

10. ____________________________________________________________________________________

11. ____________________________________________________________________________________

12. ____________________________________________________________________________________

13. ____________________________________________________________________________________

14. ____________________________________________________________________________________

II. What would you say is the writer’s overall rhetorical purpose?

III. How many proposals for dealing with the problem of homelessness does the author criticize?

IV. How many proposals does she make herself?

V. Why do you think she spends so little time describing the problem?Basic Principles of Outlining (adapted from Sealy Library, John Jay College of Criminal Justice)

40

8D

9A


An outline presents a picture of the main ideas and the subsidiary (supporting) ideas of any subject. Some typical uses of outlining are: a class reading assignment, an essay, a term paper, a book review or a speech. For any of these, an outline will show a basic overview and important details.

Below is the basic outline form. The main ideas take upper-case Roman numerals (I, V, X, etc.). Sub-points under each main idea take capital letters and are indented. Sub-points under the capital letters, if any, take Arabic numbers (1, 2, 3, etc.) and are further indented. Sub-points under the Arabic numbers, if any, take lower-case letters. Sub-points under lower-case letters, if any, take lower-case Roman numerals (i, ii, iii, etc.). I. MAIN IDEA A. Subsidiary idea or supporting idea to I

B. Subsidiary idea or supporting idea to I

1. Subsidiary idea to B

2. Subsidiary idea to B

a) Subsidiary idea to 2

b) Subsidiary idea to 2

i. Subsidiary idea to b)

ii. Subsidiary idea to b)

II. MAIN IDEA A. Subsidiary or supporting idea to II

B. Subsidiary idea to II

C. Subsidiary idea to II

III. MAIN IDEA

It is up to the person creating the outline to decide on how many main ideas and supporting ideas adequately describe the subject. However, if there is a I in the outline, there has to be a II; if there is an A, there has to be a B; if there is a 1, there has to be a 2, and so forth.

OUTLINING EXAMPLE

41

Process of Creating Outline1. Generate research questions2. Find raw data3. Create categories for raw data (categorize)4. Decide on an order

general to specific chronological spatial


Suppose you are outlining a speech on AIDS, and these are some of the ideas you feel should be included: AZT, Transmittal, AIDS babies, Teenagers, Safe sex, Epidemic numbers, Research.

To put these ideas into outline form, decide first on the main encompassing ideas. These might be: I. Transmittal, II. Societal Consequences, III. Research.

Next, decide where the rest of the important ideas fit in. Are they part of AIDS transmittal or AIDS societal consequences or AIDS research solutions? The complete outline might look like this:

Major Aspects of HIV/Aids

I. Transmittal of HIV/AIDS A. Transfusions

B. Body fluids

1. Sexual

2. Non-sexual

II. Societal Consequences of HIV/AIDS A. Epidemic disease pattern

1. Teenagers

2. Women

3. Homosexuals

B. AIDS babies

C. Increased homophobia

D. Overburdened health care

III. Research Solutions to AIDS A. AZT

B. HIV virus

C. Other viruses

It is only possible to make an outline if you have familiarity with the subject. Not only in the initial outline, but during the course of the research, the writer may find it necessary to add, subtract or change the position of various ideas. This is acceptable as long as the logical relationship among ideas is preserved.

Outlining Exercise

42

9B

Roman numerals are expressed by letters of the alphabet:

I 1II 2V 5VI 6X 10L 50C 100


Create an outline which lists each of the items below in a way that reflects the relationship between them. This means that you’ll be rearranging the items and putting them into categories you create according to what they have in common. These categories should be given a name and should be parallel in their levels of specificity. You also need to come up with a title that reflects the overall relationship of everything on the list.

MAPS

SHOES

BUNK BED

FREEZER

DVD PLAYER

SILVERWARE DRAWER

LUG WRENCH

SOFA

BLANKET

ICE CUBES

RECLINER

SPARE TIRE

FORKS

TELEVISION

CLOSET

MILK

CAR REGISTRATION PAPERS

PILLOW

REFRIGERATOR

SHIRTS

BUTTER

ICE CREAM

SPOONS

An important part of outlining is creating parallel levels of specificity, which are indicated by indentations and numeral/letter types and sizes

43


Dropout Position Paper Outline

Thesis: teen suicide is a serious problem that is being addressed in the wrong way; prevention efforts should focus on gay and lesbian youths.

I. Exposition section A. Evidence of the problem’s seriousness

1. Evidence of the problem’s seriousnessA.B. C.

2. The awful consequences of failed attemptsA. B.

b. Demographic breakdown 1. 2. 3. 4.

C. Reasons why 1.

a.b.c.

2. 3.

II. Summary & analysis sectionA. Summary of the proposal to ban so-called “suicide rock”

1.2.

B. criticisms of this approach1.2.3.4.5.

III. Proposals section a. b.

1. 2. 3. 4.

c. Attractiveness of proposals 1. 2.

44

9D


*Visit the Library*

Primary and Secondary Sources (adapted from Princeton University Library)

What is a Primary Source?

A primary source is a document or physical object which was written or created during the time

under study. These sources were present during an experience or time period and offer an inside

view of a particular event. Some types of primary sources include:

ORIGINAL DOCUMENTS (excerpts or translations acceptable): Diaries, speeches,

manuscripts, letters, interviews, news film footage, autobiographies, official records

CREATIVE WORKS: Poetry, drama, novels, music, art

RELICS OR ARTIFACTS: Pottery, furniture, clothing, buildings

Examples of primary sources include:

Diary of Anne Frank - Experiences of a Jewish family during WWII

The Constitution of Canada - Canadian History

A journal article reporting NEW research or findings

Weavings and pottery - Native American history

Plato's Republic - Women in Ancient Greece

What is a Secondary Source?

A secondary source interprets and analyzes primary sources. These sources are one or more steps

removed from the event. Secondary sources may have pictures, quotes or graphics of primary

sources in them. Some types of secondary sources include:

PUBLICATIONS: Textbooks, magazine articles, histories, criticisms, commentaries,

encyclopedias

Examples of secondary sources include:

A journal/magazine article which interprets or reviews previous findings

A history textbook

A book about the effects of WWI

http://www.sanfernandohs.com/apps/pages/index.jsp?uREC_ID=229840&type=d

45

10A


Summarizing Do’s and Don’ts Start with a FATt sentence

Use SPORT to show how the ideas you include are related

Use verbs that reflect the writer’s rhetorical purpose (for example, “claim”, “assert”,

“contend” in addition to “argue” if it’s an argument that you’re summarizing)

Verbs that refer to what the author says should be in the present tense

Don’t include your opinion on the topic of the piece you’re summarizing

o The only personal opinion you should include is a comment on how good the

writer’s argument is (if you’re also writing a summary)

Make sure to make it clear that each and every point of the author’s essay that you

include in your summary is clearly attributed (identified as belonging to) to the author so

that your reader doesn’t wonder whether you’ve included your opinion

o Use phrases like, “Smith argues that”, “according to the author”, etc (note how

carefully this is done in the sample summaries)

Use the author’s first and last name the first time you mention her; thereafter, use only

her last name

Avoid using “I” (unnecessary, especially since you’re not including your personal

opinion)

46

10C


HOW “FATt” IS YOUR TOPIC SENTENCE?

F = FocusA = Author’s NameT = Titlet = Text Type (news article, editorial, short story, novel, book, etc)

FATt TOPIC SENTENCES: SOME POSSIBILITIES

1. YOU CAN DO A TEXT REFERENCE FIRST (t)

In the editorial “When the Juvenile System Becomes a Cure That Kills,” John Hurst reveals the trials and tribulations of an adolescent in the troubled reformatory system in California.

In his editorial “When the Juvenile System Becomes a Cure That Kills,” John Hurst explores the failures of the juvenile system through the eyes of a young, disturbed girl.

John Hurst’s editorial “When the Juvenile System Becomes a Cure That Kills,” explores the failures of the juvenile system, through the eyes of a young, disturbed girl.

2. YOU CAN DO AN AUTHOR REFERENCE FIRST (A)

John Hurst described the trials and tribulations of an adolescent in the troubled reformatory system of California in his editorial “When the Juvenile System Becomes a Cure That Kills.”

John Hurst, the author of the editorial “When the Juvenile System Becomes a Cure That Kills,” implies, through a young girl’s experiences, that the strictness in the reformatories could be a reason why the patients become suicidal.

3. YOU CAN DO A TITLE REFERENCE FIRST (T)

“When the Juvenile System Becomes a Cure That Kills” is an editorial written by John Hurst that conveys one girl’s story about how the harsh rules in a juvenile system result in suicide.

“When the Juvenile System Becomes a Cure That Kills,” an editorial by John Hurst, reveals the cruel disciplinary actions of the juvenile system that causes patients in a reformatory to become depressed and suicidal.

4. YOU CAN DO A FOCUS FIRST (F)Ridiculously strict rules cause young people retained in California reformatories to commit suicide, suggests reporter John Hurst in his editorial entitled “When the Juvenile System Becomes a Cure That Kills.”

47

11A


TITLE: AUTHOR: TEXT TYPE:

FOCUS: Rhetorical Objective Words (Author’s Purpose):

Words

Analyzes Assesses Clarifies Comments upon Considers Compares Contrasts Evaluates Defines

48

Demonstrates Describes Discusses Elaborates Evaluates Examines Explains Explores Identifies

Illustrates Interprets Justifies Outlines Reviews Shows States Summarizes

A FATT topic sentence:


English 9A: Paying Kids to Go to Schoolby Sara B. Miller, The Christian Science Monitor / July 29, 2005

1When students return to Chelsea High School next month, they'll get more than an impeccable attendance record if they make it to class each day: They'll get cash.

2Under a new plan, a student who misses not a single day per quarter will receive $25 in an account - redeemable upon graduation. In doing so, the school joins a number of districts throughout the country turning to incentives to boost test scores, GPAs, and student turnout.

3Some schools, like Chelsea High, are focused solely on attendance. Officials there maintain that they can't carry out their mission if a student is not in class absorbing the material. Others are doling out gift certificates, coupons, and checks if students earn straight A's or land on the honor roll.

4Supporters say such reward systems make good sense. Humans, they say, respond to enticements. A student is no different from a football player working to clinch a championship or a budding broker putting in extra hours for a year-end bonus.

5But critics call it bribery and say a capitalist mind-set is invading an institution built around the notion that knowledge itself is the quest. What's more, not all kids can control their attendance, or their achievement, and rewarding only a select few could further undermine the efforts of the rest, they say.

6The move is driven in large part by the new emphasis on accountability: Under the No Child Left Behind Act and various state laws also focused on results, increased scrutiny has put pressure on schools to perform.

7"American education [today] is far more interested in specific outcomes," says Justin Torres, research director at the Fordham Foundation in Washington. "There are all kinds of outside pressures on schools, and one way they have responded is offering cash bonuses."

8The job of enticing students to learn - and thus helping schools perform - was not always so challenging, says Morrie Seigal, the Chelsea School Committee member who masterminded the plan.

9Mr. Seigal grew up in Chelsea, a diverse community outside Boston. As a student, he went to school for the education itself. "There is something about paying kids to come to school that is not appealing to me," he says. "It's sad. Kids should want to come to school and succeed on their own. This is their whole life, what they learn in school. That should be incentive enough."

10Yet as a Chelsea teacher and administrator for 37 years, he says things have changed. Part of that may be the stresses on modern families, he contends. Others cite the decreasing value of a high school education: Thirty years ago, a high school diploma would land a good manufacturing job. That's not necessarily the case now.

11So anything helps, even if that means pushing aside one's philosophy, says Seigal: "I feel we have an obligation to do everything possible to get our kids to come and stay in school."

12Experts are unable to point to a definitive body of work proving that such incentives actually rouse a significant amount of students out of bed. One study from the University of Southern California in the mid-1990s reportedly found that eighth-graders performed 13 percent higher on a national math exam when they were offered $1 for every correct answer.

49

10B


13For Michael Grady, a professor of educational studies at St. Louis University, anecdotal evidence is enough to convince him that financial incentives can work. Money will not solve all truancy, of course, but he says a $50 check per week for students with perfect attendance has made a difference at an Illinois charter school. He is a consultant to the school, which is made up of students kicked out of other places. [Editor's note: The original version misidentified the location of the charter school.

14In some cases, though, it has backfired. Dr. Grady says that students have used the money to buy drugs, and some have been beaten by parents - dependent on the cash - for skipping school. But "hard-core kids showed up at school to do some work," he says. "Fifty dollars is a heck of a lot of money for a lot of these kids. It does make a difference in their lives."

15Many experts do not see the issue in black or white. Mr. Torres says he would find fault with wealthier communities handing out cash to students for merely showing up. But at the KIPP schools, a charter program in low-income communities across the country, he says a variety of incentives have given students the chance to take field trips to Washington or join after-school clubs.

16"I think that is the key," he says, "incentives that can also be tied back to the educational mission."

17Garrett Duncan, an associate professor of education at Washington University in St. Louis, says many incentive programs are launched in poor rural and urban communities, and could have unintended consequences. They reinforce "the stereotypes that certain communities do not value education like others; that the value is in the dollar sign," he says.

18At Chelsea High School, where attendance levels hover around 90 percent, officials say that making graduation a requirement to collect the money makes it an academic endeavor - even if the money can be used however students wish.

19Gerald McCue, executive director for administration and finance for Chelsea Public Schools, says the school needed to overhaul its attendance system, which he says was in some cases punitive and counterproductive: Students failed courses for five or more unexcused absences, and those students with five absences often had no motivation to attend the rest of the course.

20But financial incentives can be counterproductive, too, says Richard Ryan, a professor of psychology at the University of Rochester in New York. Aside from unwanted public-health consequences - sick children showing up at school - once a day is missed and a record tainted, the incentive is no longer relevant.

21"Kids have been going to school for centuries without needing to be paid for it," Professor Ryan notes.

22While some my balk at the idea of paying cash to teenagers - especially when skipping school is technically a punishable offense - Seigal maintains that it is really no different from offering a scholarship to the most diligent students. And unlike the permanence of an attendance record, the program is not inflexible, says Mr. McCue. "If it works and improves attendance, terrific," he says. "If not, we terminate it and come up with something else."

50


Outline of “Paying Kids to Go to School”

I. FATt Sentence

Focus: report on an idea for motivating kids to take their education more seriously that involves financial incentives, together with opinions for and against

Author:

Title:

Type:

II. Supporters

A. Who’s in favor?/What, specifically, are they in favor of?a. Chelsea High School (Boston) Administration

i. $25 per quarter for perfect attendanceb. Illinois Charter School

i. $50 per week for perfect attendancec. Christian Science Monitor? (hint of bias?)

i. $1 per correct answerB. Reasons Why

a. Chelsea High Schooli. Logic: “students can’t learn if they’re not in class”

b. Illinois Charter Schooli. Expert Opinion: Michael Grady, St. Louis University Ed’n Professor

c. Christian Science Monitor (hint of bias?)i. USC study

III. Opponents

A. Who’s opposed?/Why are they opposed?a. Unidentified critic: this is briberyb. Grady (see above): concedes that some kids use money to buy drugs/that c. Garrett Duncan, an associate professor of education at Washington University in St. Louis:

reinforces “the stereotypes that certain communities do not value education like others,” d. Richard Ryan, a professor of psychology at the University of Rochester in New York. Paying

kids has never been necessary before – why start now?

Morrie Seigal, Chelsea School Committee member who masterminded the plan: kids should want to come to school because they know it’s important

51

11D


Sample Summary of “Paying Kids to Go to School”

(highlighted to indicate words and phrases used to establish coherence, as well as verbs in the present tense that reflect author’s rhetorical purpose)

In an article appearing in The Christian Science Monitor (CSM) entitled “Paying Kids to Go to

School,” various aspects of an approach designed to encourage school-age children to attend class and to

take their education seriously are described and critiqued. The paper reports on a school in Boston,

Chelsea High, which rewards a student’s perfect attendance by giving him or her $25 per quarter. It also

describes a charter school in Illinois, which gives its students $50 per week for not missing any class. At

the former school, the money isn’t available until a student’s graduation day, whereas, at the latter one,

students can get their money at the end of the week, quarter, or year. CSM reports that these schools

decided to take this approach based on the advice they received from educational studies. In the case of

the Illinois school, CSM states that they were advised by Michael Grady, a St. Louis University education

professor. As for the Boston school, its administrator reportedly reasoned that “students can’t learn if

they’re not in class.” In addition to this support for the idea, CSM cites a 1990s study at The University

of Southern California, which found that 8th graders did 13% better on a national exam when they were

offered $1 for every correct answer. In contrast to these individuals who support this idea are a

number of people identified by CSM who don’t. One critic is quoted as arguing that paying kids to go

to school is tantamount to bribery, and that doing so will ultimately result in kids not doing anything

unless they are paid. Another concern mentioned in the article is that teenagers will use this money to

buy drugs. Moreover, a professor of education is quoted as saying that paying kids to go to school

reinforces “the stereotypes that certain communities do not value education like others,” while CSM

cites a professor of psychiatry who pointed out that kids have been going to school for centuries without

getting paid to do so. Even the author of the Chelsea High School plan is reported as saying that “kids

should want to come to school on their own” and that it’s “sad” that they do not.

52

12A


Student IDs That Track the StudentsBy Maurice Chammah and Nick Swartsell for The Texas Tribune,Published: October 6, 2012

Giving students radio frequency tags means more state money, but some critics are raising privacy issues.

SAN ANTONIO — For Tira Starr, an eighth grader at Anson Jones Middle School, the plastic nametag hanging around her neck that she has decorated with a smiley face and a purple bat sticker offers a way to reflect her personal flair. For administrators, it is something else entirely: a device that lets them use radio frequency technology — with scanners tucked behind walls and ceilings — to track her whereabouts.

Anson Jones is the first school in San Antonio’s Northside Independent School District to roll out the new nametags, which are part of a pilot program intended to ensure that the district receives all of the state dollars to which it is entitled.

In Texas, school finance is a numbers game: schools receive money based on the number of students counted in their homeroom classes each morning. At Anson Jones, as at other schools, many students were in school but not in homeroom, so they were not counted and the district lost money, said Pascual Gonzalez, a spokesman for the district.

“We were leaving money on the table,” he said, adding that the district expects a $2 million return on an initial investment of $261,000 in the technology at two pilot schools. But the radio frequency identification nametags have prompted concerns from civil liberties groups and electronic privacy watchdogs, which fear a Big Brother atmosphere in Texas public schools.

Matthew Simpson, a policy strategist for the American Civil Liberties Union of Texas, said the technology was easy to acquire, meaning people outside a school might be able to monitor a student if they obtained the student’s unique tracking number. Mr. Simpson said the technology was originally designed for shipping goods and for cattle. “It was never intended for people,” he said.

But students and educators at Anson Jones say they are excited about the practical advantages — getting to eat lunch faster by scanning their bar codes in the lunch line, or being able to locate a child quickly in an emergency.

Northside is not the first district to use the tracking devices. Two Houston-area districts began the program several years ago. The Spring district, for example, started using the technology in 2004 as a way to track elementary students getting on and off buses. It expanded the program to high school students three years ago and has so far recovered $400,000, said Karen Garrison, a spokeswoman for the district.

“Our system still focuses on safety but has the added benefit of recovering average daily attendance funding,” Ms. Garrison said. Wendy Reyes, the principal of Anson Jones, said only one parent had complained about the program at her school. On the first day of classes at Jay High School, home to the other pilot program school in Northside, several parents staged a protest across the street from the school, though most did not have students in the district.

Many students, teachers and parents at the middle school feel the technology’s benefits outweigh privacy concerns, Ms. Reyes said.

53

12B

http://www.nisd.net/jay/

http://www.aclutx.org/

http://www.nisd.net/jones/


Madelene Garra was among those praising the program. “It gives the kids a little bit more responsibility, knowing that we as a faculty are keeping up with them,” she said “Once they get out there in the real world, they’re going to have to be on the job on time, and they’re going to have to be accountable.”

Sample Outline of “Student IDs that Track the Students” I. FATt Sentence

Focus: Students wear plastic nametags fit with radio frequency devices that allow schools to keep track of their whereaboutsAuthor: Title: Type:

II. Arguments in favor of this approachA. San Antonio’s Northside Independent School District receives money from

the state based on number of students that are in homeroom classes each day (Pascual Gonzalez, District spokesman)

1. Anson Jones Middle School should recover $2 million in one year2. another pilot school using the IDs has recovered $400,000 in 3 years

B. Other Benefits of IDs (teachers/students/administrators who use IDs) 1. expedited lunch lines2. quick location of students in case of emergency3. monitoring elementary school students getting on and off buses4. good practice for future job

a. holds students accountable for being on time to class

III. Arguments against this approachA. technology is easy to acquire so people outside the school may be able to

track students by getting a hold of their ID number (Matthew Simpson, ACLU of Texas)

B. this technology was originally intended to keep track of shipping goods and cattle, not people (Simpson)

C. Some parents also protested across street from school using IDs

54

12C


Sample Summary of “Student IDs that Track the Students”(highlighted to indicate words and phrases used to establish coherence, as well as verbs in the present

tense that reflect author’s rhetorical purpose)

In an article appearing in The Texas Tribune entitled “Student IDs that Track the Students,”

Maurice Chammah and Nick Swartsell describe an approach being used at two pilot schools in Texas

designed to encourage school-age children to attend class and summarize the opinions of both supporters

and critics of the plan. Their report focuses on Anson Jones Middle School in San Antonio’s Northside

Independent School District, which requires students to wear a plastic nametag fitted with radio frequency

technology that allows scanners in the walls and ceilings of the school to track their whereabouts. One

supporter of the plan they cite is Pascual Gonzalez, a spokesman for the District, who explains that the

district receives money from the state based on the number of students that are in their homeroom classes

each day. He argues that this plan would ensure that the district receives all of the state money to which

it is entitled: a number he expects to reach approximately $2 million as a result of this technology. Other

benefits of these tags noted by students and teachers at Anson Jones and two other districts which have

adopted this technology are expedited lunch lines, quick location of students in case of emergency, and

effective monitoring of elementary school students getting on and off of buses. In the Spring District,

which is also using this approach, a high school has recovered $400,000 in 3 years according to the

authors. Another supporter is quoted as claiming that this technology forces kids to be on time to

classes, which he says is good practice for when they enter the job market in the future. However, the

authors point out that, despite these seemingly positive outcomes, there are also many critics of this

approach. They cite Matthew Simpson, for example, a policy strategist for the ACLU of Texas, who

contends that because the technology is so easy to acquire, people outside of the school may be able to

track students by getting a hold of their ID number. He also finds the use of this technology on students

to be inappropriate as he claims that it was originally intended to keep track of shipping goods and cattle.

The authors also mention that there were also several parents who protested across the street from

another pilot school that had adopted the IDs on the first day of class.

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12D


Startling Finds on Teenage BrainsBy Paul Thompson The Sacramento Bee, Friday, May 25, 2001

(1) Emotions ran high at the trial of Nathaniel Brazill in West Palm Beach, Fla., two weeks ago. Friends of slain teacher Barry Grunow called the death penalty, while a growing crowd of demonstrators outside the courthouse wielded hastily written placards reading, "A child is not a man." Jurors returned with their verdict May 16: Fourteen-year-old Brazill, charged in last May's shooting of middle-school teacher Grunow, was found guilty of second-degree murder.

(2) A Florida grand jury had previously ruled that Brazill, who frequently looked dazed during the trial, would be tried as an adult, and if he had been convicted of first-degree murder he would have faced life in prison without parole. But Brazill's immaturity was evident throughout this incident—from the act itself of Brazill's shooting a teacher he considered one of his favorites, to his subsequent inability to give a reason for doing so, to the various quizzical looks that came across his face as the verdicts were read.

(3) In terms of cognitive development, as research on the human brain has shown Brazill— and any other young teen—is far from adulthood.

(4) Over the last several years, as school shootings have seemed to occur with disturbing frequency, startling discoveries have emerged about the teenage brain. The White House held a televised conference on adolescent development in May of last year, and a flurry of papers on the teen brain has appeared in top science journals. Reporters and teen advocates ask: Do the studies help explain the impulsive, erratic behavior of teens? The biggest surprise in recent teen-brain research is the finding that a massive loss of brain tissue occurs in the teen years.

(5) Specifically, my own research group at the University of California, Los Angeles, and our colleagues at the National Institutes of Health has developed technology to map the patterns of brain growth in individual children and teenagers. With repeated brain scans of kids from 3 to 20, we pieced together "movies" showing how brains grow and change.

(6) Some changes make perfect sense: Language systems grow furiously until age 12 and then stop, coinciding with the time when children learn foreign languages fastest. Mathematical brain systems grow little until puberty, corresponding with the observation that kids have difficulty with abstract concepts before then. Basically, the brain is like a puzzle, and growth is fastest in the exact parts the kids need to learn skills at different times. So far, all well and good.

(7) But what really caught our eye was a massive loss of brain tissue that occurs in the teenage years. The loss was like a wildfire, and you could see it in every teenager. Gray matter, which brain researchers believe supports all our thinking and emotions, is purged at a rate of 1 percent to 2 percent a year during this period. Stranger still, brain cells and connections are only being lost in the areas controlling impulses, risk-taking and self-control. These front al lobes, which inhibit our violent passions, rash actions, and regulate our emotions, are vastly immature throughout the teenage years.

(8) The implications are tantalizing. Brazill was only 13 when he committed his crime. He said he made a "stupid mistake," but prosecutors argued that by bringing a gun to school he planned the crime.

(9) Does "planning" mean the same thing for a 13-year -old, with his diminished capacity for controlling erratic behavior, as it means for an adult? The verdict, in this case, seems to line up with the research. The

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15A


jurors, by returning a verdict of second-degree murder instead of first, indicated that they believe Brazil’s actions, while not accidental, were not fully thought-out, either.

(10) Linking this maelstrom of normal brain change with legal or moral accountability is tough: Even though normal teens are experiencing a wildfire of tissue loss in their brains that does not remove their accountability. What is clear from the research is that the parts of the frontal lobes that inhibit reckless actions restructure themselves with startling speed in the teen years. Given this delicate—and drastic—reshaping of the brain, teens need all the help they can get to steer their development onto the right path.

(11) While research on brain-tissue loss can help us to understand teens better, it cannot be used to excuse their violent or homicidal behavior. But it can be used as evidence that teenagers are not yet adults, and the legal system shouldn't treat them as such.

Paul Thompson is an assistant professor of neurology at the University of California, Los Angeles, School of Medicine.

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Writing a Summary: Converting a List of Main Ideas into an Outline“STARTLING FINDS”

MAIN IDEAS1. Author’s apparent purpose is to persuade readers that juveniles should not be tried as adults in court.

He bases this opinion on scientific research that proves that in terms of cognitive development, juveniles are far from adulthood.

2. He cites Florida case of Nathaniel Brazill who was charged and tried as an adult in May 2001 for killing his teacher. If he had been convicted of first degree murder, he would have faced life in prison without parole. However, jury returned a verdict of 2nd degree murder.

3. This example is intended to appeal to reader’s emotions and suggest that even the jury recognized Brazill’s lack of maturity, and subsequent lack of complete responsibility for the crime, by granting him leniency in their verdict.

4. He gives credibility to the pursuit of adolescent development research by pointing out that the White House had a televised conference on the topic and that papers on the teen brain have appeared in top science journals. He fails to present names of journals, findings of conference/journals

5. From this research, he cites the major finding that a massive loss of brain tissue occurs during the teen years.

6. He cites his own research group at UCLA who collaborated with National Institutes of Health (seemingly credible sources) to map patterns of brain growth. They repeatedly scanned the brains of kids from 3-20.

7. The research finds: 1) language systems grow furiously until age 12 and then stop. This coincides with time children learn foreign languages the fastest; 2) Mathematical brain systems grow little until puberty, corresponding with the observation that kids have difficulty with abstract concepts before then. Stereotype – observation that teens have difficulty with abstract concepts?

8. Research also found that a massive loss of brain tissue occurs in the teen years in every teenager. Gray matter, which controls our thinking and our emotions, is purged at a rate of 1-2% a year during this period. Brain cells are only being lost in areas controlling impulses, risk-taking, and self-control. The frontal lobes, which inhibit our violent passions, rash actions, and regulate our emotions, are vastly immature throughout these years.

9. He points out that research also shows that these frontal lobes also restructure themselves with startling speed in the teen years, so linking this brain loss to their accountability is tricky. He does not provide an answer to the question of at what age this restructuring takes place.

10. He admits that research on teen brain tissue loss cannot excuse their violent or homicidal behavior, but it can be used as evidence that they are not adults and should not be treated as such in court. Given this delicate and drastic restructuring of the brain, they need help steering their development onto the right path.

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“STARTLING FINDS” OUTLINE: (SUMMARY of an ARGUMENT)

Thesis: (students, convert thesis into a FATt sentence) According to recent teen-brain research, a massive loss of brain tissue occurs in the teen years. As a result, in terms of cognitive development, teens are not equal to adults and so should not be treated as adults in the justice system.

IV. Emotional Appeal - Nathaniel Brazill, 14 (Real-life example)A. Charged as an adult for killing his teacher; faced life in prison w/o parole if

convicted of first-degree murder1. Dazed during trial; could not give reason for crime; quizzical looks 2. Jury found him guilty of second-degree murder

V. Logical Appeal - Thompson’s research group at UCLA / National Institutes of Health (Case Study) C. Scanned brains of kids ages 3-20

1. Found language systems grow quickly until age 12 and then stopa. Time when children learn foreign languages fastest

2. Mathematical brain systems grow little until pubertya. Time when kids have difficulty with abstract concepts

D. Massive loss of brain tissue occurs in teen years in every teenager1. Gray matter that supports thinking and emotions is purged at a rate of 1-2% a

year during this period2. Brain cells and connections are lost in areas controlling impulses, risk-taking,

and self-control3. Frontal lobes, which inhibit violent passions, rash actions, and regulate

emotions, vastly immatureE. Experts acknowledging research findings

1. White House – televised conference2. Top science journals

VI. Ethical Appeal - Nathaniel Brazill A. Only 13 at time of crime, but prosecutors argued he planned crime by bringing

gun to school1. Research shows planning does not mean the same thing for adults and teens2. Jury’s verdict further evidence that his actions not fully thought-out

B. Brain tissue loss does not remove their accountabilityC. Part of frontal lobes that are lost during this time also restructure themselves

quickly in teen years1. This drastic restructuring of the brain means teens need help to steer their

development in right directionD. Findings of brain research cannot be used to excuse their violent or homicidal

behavior, but is evidence they are not adults and should not be treated as such by the legal system

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Sample Summary of “Startling Finds on Teenage Brains” (highlighted to indicate words and phrases used to establish coherence,

as well as verbs in the present tense that reflect author’s rhetorical purpose)

In an article appearing in The Sacrament Bee entitled “Startling Finds on Teenage

Brains,” Paul Thompson, assistant professor of neurology at UCLA’s School of Medicine,

summarizes the results of his research on the teenage brain, which he claims reveals significant

differences between teenagers and adults in terms of their decision-making capability. The

significance of this finding, in his opinion, is that teens should not be tried as adults in court.

He appears to have been motivated to write this article by the real-life case of Nathaniel

Brazill, who at the age of 14, was tried as an adult on a charge of first-degree murder in the death

of his middle school English teacher and faced a life sentence without the possibility of parole.

Throughout the trial, according to Thompson, Brazill’s immaturity was often on display. In

arguing that Brazill should not have been tried as an adult, Thompson summarizes the results of

his research done in collaboration with the National Institutes of Health, which seem to give a

biological reason for Brazill’s immaturity. In scanning the brains of a group of 3-20-year-olds,

Thompson found that a massive loss of brain tissue occurs during the teen years in areas

controlling impulses, risk-taking, and self-control. In Thompson’s opinion, these findings prove

that “planning” – especially when it comes to crime - does not mean the same thing for adults as

it does for teens. He therefore contends that charging Brazill with first-degree murder, for

which premeditation of the crime is required, was not appropriate. He strengthens this claim by

pointing out that the jury’s ultimately convicted Brazill of second-degree murder. Thompson is

careful to state that neither his findings nor his opinion should be used to excuse juvenile

delinquency. Rather, he believes they mean that teens should be given more help in navigating

this dynamic period of their lives.

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17A


Research Questions for Exposition Section on Dropout Problem1. Use colors (crayons, markers) or abbreviations to organize these questions by grouping them together in terms of what they have in common.

Blue: D/G = demographics - gender

Pink: D/P = demographics – parental background

Red: D/R = demographics – race

Yellow: D/S = socioeconomic status

Orange: #L = number of dropouts in a given location

Green: E = issues related to economics

Brown: I = issues related to illiteracy

Purple: P = issues related to our political system

Black: #T = drop-out rate over time

2. As you read these questions over, begin the process of re-ordering them to create a working outline by putting related questions together in categories which you create and name.

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what percentage of high school dropouts are innumerate (don’t know basic math)?

how many high school kids in the US drop out every year?

how much more money does a high school graduate make than a high school dropout?

how much money does a person need in Los Angeles to live comfortably

how many high school students drop out in other countries?

what percentage of high school dropouts are non-Hispanic whites?

what percentage of high school dropouts are typically unemployed?

how many high school students in California drop out every year?

how much money does a college graduate make in a year?

what percentage of high school dropouts end up in jail?

what percentage of high school dropouts are African American?

what percentage of SFHS students drop out every year?

how does today’s dropout rate compare with the rate 5 or 10 years ago?

how much does it cost to build and maintain a skate park?

are children of dropouts more or less likely to be dropouts themselves?

what percentage of high school dropouts are considered functionally illiterate?

what percentage of high school dropouts are Latino?

how does the dropout problem affect the nation’s economy?

what percentage of high school dropouts are male/female?

how much does it cost to house a prisoner for a year?

how do other states compare to California in their drop-out rates?

what percentage of LAUSD students drop out?

how much do SFHS athletes have to spend to buy uniforms and equipment?

what percentage of high school dropouts come from poor families?

how much does it cost to provide welfare to the unemployed?

how does SFHS’s drop-out rate compare with other LAUSD schools?

how well does our nation’s economy do compared to countries with low high school drop-out rates?

How is the US affected politically by a high school drop-out rate?

what percentage of high school dropouts are Native American?

how much tax does the average American pay?

how much is our nation’s unemployment rate affected by the number of high school ?

how much does it cost to sponsor a concert?

what percentage of high school dropouts are considered functionally illiterate?

on average, how well educated are the parents of high school dropouts?

how do drop-out rates in urban, suburban, and rural areas compare?

what percentage of high school dropouts are Asian?

how much does it cost the school to send a class on a field trip?

How does the drop-out rate in LAUSD compare to other districts?

what’s so bad about being illiterate or innumerate?

how likely is it that a high school dropout will end up homeless?

How many jobs in the US go unfilled because there aren’t enough qualified applicants?

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Punctuating Titles1) In print, titles of longer works are italicized, or printed in italics. This sentence is printed in italics. In handwritten papers, underlining is used to set off the words in some kinds of titles: books, plays, book length poems, newspapers, magazines, pamphlets, movies, and television series, paintings, sculptures, CD titles, ballets, operas, musicals ships, aircraft, and spacecraft.

2) Use quotation marks to enclose the titles of shorter works: short stories essaysshort poems songs, articles chapters of books television episodes

3) Capitalize the letter of the first word, the last word, and all important words in a title.

Part I - Directions: Add underlining or quotation marks wherever needed in the following sentences.

1. The book American Folk Toys includes directions for making many simple toys.

2. Some students in ballet class will have roles in the Nutcracker Suite.

3. Our group is studying Walter de la Mare’s poem The Listeners.

4. One of my favorite episodes of Star Trek was called The Trouble with Tribbles.

5. The short story A Time of Beginnings was about the life of an artist.

6. In the history book Across the Centuries there’s a chapter called Colonial Americans-How They Lived.

7. Jasmine will sing The Star-Spangled Banner at the baseball game tomorrow night.

8. Walt Disney’s film Fantasia was the first color cartoon to feature classical music.

9. The song Tomorrow is from my favorite musical Annie.

10. I enjoyed Jack London’s story To Build a Fire and his novel The Call of the Wild.

11. North by Northwest is a classic Alfred Hitchcock film.

12. The famous opera Madame Butterfly has a tragic story line.

13. My aunt Lulu always sends me a subscription to National Geographic magazine at Christmas time.

14. Lord Byron’s poem Don Juan is so long that it fills an entire book.

15. The space shuttle Colombia landed perfectly after its flight.

16. I hope to see the exhibit about the Titanic at the Metreon in San Francisco.

17. The San Francisco Examiner had a great article called 49er’s and Raiders Clash.

18. I really liked the way Catherine McPhee sang Somewhere Over the Rainbow on American Idol.

19. Did you like Langston Hughes’ story Thank You Madam?

20. The song Listen on Beyonce’s new album B’Day is from the upcoming movie Dreamgirls.

PART II21. Write a sentence that contains a song title. 22. Write a sentence that contains a book title.

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Integrating Quotes: The “T.I.E.S.” method(stolen liberally from a variety of sources)

Warning: Don’t Drop That Quote!A “dropped” or “floating” quote is one which is simply plopped into a paragraph with no integration with your own words. To avoid this, use smooth “T.I.E.S.” between quotations and your own writing. You don’t need to use the whole sentence or quote. Chop the quote down to the chunk that best fits your sentence or paragraph

structure.

T.I.E.S.: Tag, Introduce, Embed, Split(all quotes are cited using MLA guidelines, so use this to help you with in text citations)

Tag: “Quote first,” Context second “Where is my God? Where is He?” Weisel asks while suffering in Auschwitz (Douglas 61). “But the 1950s were not, in the end, as calm and contented as the politics and the popular culture

of the time suggested,” cautions historian Alan Brinkley, author of American History: A Survey (817).

“The social-media-inspired movements may hold all the power, but with very little long-term effect” according to many scholars around the world (Rode).

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,” wrote Charles Dickens in A Tale of Two Cities about the end of the eighteenth century (35).

Introduce: context first, “Quote second” Weisel asks while suffering in Auschwitz, “Where is my God? Where is He?” (Douglas 61). According to some scholars around the world “[t]he social-media-inspired movements may hold

all the power, but with very little long-term effect” (Rode). For Charles Dickens wrote the end of the eighteenth century was both “the best of times” and

“the worst of times” (35). Embed: Context, “Quote,” Context (sandwich the quote)

Weisel asks, “Where is my God? Where is He?” while suffering in Auschwitz (Douglas 61). According to some scholars “[t]he social-media-inspired movements may hold all the power, but

with very little long-term effect” around the globe (Rode). For Charles Dickens the end of the eighteenth century was “both the best of times” and “the

worst of times,” and many of his fellow Londoners shared this sentiment (35). Split: “Quote,” context, “quote.” (note: be sure that the quote is long enough to split)

“Where is my God?” Weisel asks, “Where is He?” while suffering in Auschwitz (Douglas 61). “The social-media-inspired movements may hold all the power” in some places around the globe

“but with very little long-term effect” (Rode). “It was the best of times,” said Dickens, and “it was the worst of times” (35).

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A Few MLA Tips: The first time you use a source, it helps to introduce the

author’s full name, the title, and any other pertinent information.

After this, you can use just the author’s last name.o When author is not mentioned: (last name 32).o When author is mentioned: (32).

If you change any wording within the quote use brackets [ ]

Do not put a punctuation before and after parentheses:o . (32).

Key Phrases You Can Use To Introduce Quotes According to _____, “ ______” _____ claims that “____” As ___ explains, ____ In fact, _____ asserts that “____” ___ illustrates it this way: “____” _____ cites ____ who argues “____” ______ contends “_____” ______ illustrates “____” _____ argues “____”

English 9A: Persuasion

In-Text CitationsIn-text citations, also known as parenthetical citations, give the reader citation information immediately, at the point at which it is most meaningful. Rather than having to turn to a footnote or an end-note, the reader sees the citation as part of the writer’s text.

Most in-text citations consist of only the author’s last name and a page reference. Usually the author’s name is given in an introductory or signal phrase at the beginning of the borrowed material, and the page reference is given in parentheses at the end. If the author’s name is not given at the beginning, put it in parentheses along with the page reference. The parenthetical reference signals the end of the borrowed material and directs your readers to the list of works cited should they want to pursue a particular source. Treat electronic sources as you do print sources, keeping in mind that some electronic sources use paragraph numbers instead of page numbers. Consider the following examples of in-text citations, which are from a student paper.

In-text Citations (MLA Style)Educators today are debating whether a flunking grade has any place in today’s educational

arena. In other words, is there some good that comes out of the threat of a flunking grade or even the grade of F itself? Educator Mary Sherry argues that the threat of flunking can be “a positive teaching tool” and that students with a “healthy fear of failure” are motivated (447). On the other hand, students should not be overly afraid to fail. As one popular writer and university professor reminds us, “Failure isn’t fatal. Countless people have had a bout with it and come out stronger as a result” (Zinsser 451).

The following shows how the preceding in-text citations should appear in the list of works cited at the end of the essay.

List of Works Cited (MLA Style)Sherry, Mary. “In Prase of the F Word.” Models for Writers. Ed. Alfred Rosa and Paul Escholtz. 7 th ed.

Boston: Bedford, 2001. 445-47Zinsser, William. “The Right to Fail.” Models for Writers. Ed. Alfred Rosa and Paul Escholtz. 7 th Ed.

Boston: Bedford, 2001. 450-53.

General Guidelines: Begin the list on a new page following the last page of the text Organize the list alphabetically by author’s last name. if the entry does not have author’s name, alphabetize the

first major word of the title. Double-Space within and between entries. Begin each entry at the left margin. If the entry is longer than one line, INDENT the second and subsequent lines

five spaces (Ctrl Tab/Command Tab) Do not number entries

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Your Last Name 14

Works Cited

American Library Association. American Library Association. ALA, 2008. Web. 14 Jan. 2009.

Brouwer, Joel. “The Spots.” Legitimate Dangers: American Poets of the New Century. Ed. Michael

Dumanis and Cate Marvin. Louisville: Sarabande, 2006. 51-52. Print.

Harris, Shan, Allen Harper, and Chris Eagle. “Gray Hat Hacking.” 2nd ed. New York: McGraw,

2007. 378-83. Print.

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