Family Systems TheoryFamily Systems Theory

Source : www.bluffton.edu/courses/tlc/nathp/powerpoint/familysystems.ppt

Family Systems TheoryFamily Systems Theory

Family systems theory is a body of knowledge Family systems theory is a body of knowledge that has arisen out of the observations of clinical that has arisen out of the observations of clinical & counseling psychologists as they work with & counseling psychologists as they work with individuals and their families.individuals and their families.

The theory suggests that individuals cannot be The theory suggests that individuals cannot be understood in isolation from one another—understood in isolation from one another—families are families are systemssystems of interconnected and of interconnected and interdependent individuals, none of whom can interdependent individuals, none of whom can be understood in isolation from the systembe understood in isolation from the system

What does it mean to say a family What does it mean to say a family is a is a systemsystem??

To understand this better, consider To understand this better, consider the example of a mobile. the example of a mobile.

When you move any one piece of When you move any one piece of a mobile, all the other pieces move a mobile, all the other pieces move too! They do not exist in isolation too! They do not exist in isolation from one another, and “movement” from one another, and “movement” in any one part of the “system” will in any one part of the “system” will affect all the rest of the parts of the affect all the rest of the parts of the system.system.

Terms from Family Systems Theory Terms from Family Systems Theory that you’ll want to understandthat you’ll want to understand

Family RolesFamily Roles

Family RulesFamily Rules

Homeostasis/EquilibriumHomeostasis/Equilibrium

Terms from Family Systems Theory Terms from Family Systems Theory that you’ll want to understandthat you’ll want to understand

Family Roles--what is expected of each family Family Roles--what is expected of each family membermember– The most basic types of roles are “father,” “mother,” The most basic types of roles are “father,” “mother,”

“aunt,” “daughter,” “son,” “grandmother,” etc. What is “aunt,” “daughter,” “son,” “grandmother,” etc. What is expected from people in each of these roles?expected from people in each of these roles?

– But there are also roles beyond this most basic level. But there are also roles beyond this most basic level. For example, one person may be the “clown” of the For example, one person may be the “clown” of the family. Another person may be the “responsible one.” family. Another person may be the “responsible one.” One person may be the “emotional one.” Another role One person may be the “emotional one.” Another role might be “crazy uncle Joe” who everyone knows is might be “crazy uncle Joe” who everyone knows is going to act odd in his own unique way. There are a going to act odd in his own unique way. There are a lot of different roles in families. lot of different roles in families.

Terms (cont.)Terms (cont.)FAMILY RULESFAMILY RULES

Family Rules are rules about how the family operates; these Family Rules are rules about how the family operates; these rules are often unspoken. For example…rules are often unspoken. For example…

When people are angry at each other, do they express When people are angry at each other, do they express this or keep it to themselves?this or keep it to themselves?How affectionate or emotional are family members How affectionate or emotional are family members expected or allowed to be with each other?expected or allowed to be with each other?How do decisions get made in the family? Who has input How do decisions get made in the family? Who has input and who is expected to “just go along”? How is the final and who is expected to “just go along”? How is the final decision made? decision made? Are there limits on “how much” or in what ways kids can Are there limits on “how much” or in what ways kids can argue with their parents? argue with their parents? How much are family members “allowed” to talk to people How much are family members “allowed” to talk to people outside the family about family problems? outside the family about family problems?

Families tend to develop patterns about these sorts of things (& Families tend to develop patterns about these sorts of things (& other similar types of things). These patterns become other similar types of things). These patterns become “unspoken rules.” Family members may see these things as “unspoken rules.” Family members may see these things as “just the way it is,” but different families do these things “just the way it is,” but different families do these things differently from one another.differently from one another.

Reflecting on Family Roles & Reflecting on Family Roles & Family RulesFamily Rules

Take a minute to think about how Take a minute to think about how you would answer the questions on you would answer the questions on the preceding slide with regard to the preceding slide with regard to your family!your family!

Systems develop typical ways of being which are reliable Systems develop typical ways of being which are reliable and predictable. Family roles & family rules are examples and predictable. Family roles & family rules are examples of what I mean by “typical ways of being.”of what I mean by “typical ways of being.”Whether these roles & rules are adaptive or not, there is a Whether these roles & rules are adaptive or not, there is a pull from the system NOT to CHANGE—but to continue pull from the system NOT to CHANGE—but to continue functioning as things have always been. functioning as things have always been. Think of the mobile. If you move one part, the other parts Think of the mobile. If you move one part, the other parts move. But if you let go of that one part, the whole move. But if you let go of that one part, the whole “system” (i.e., the parts of the mobile) will “pull each other” “system” (i.e., the parts of the mobile) will “pull each other” back to the way they were before that one part moved.back to the way they were before that one part moved.This tendency of systems to keep doing things as they’ve This tendency of systems to keep doing things as they’ve already been done is known as homeostasis or the already been done is known as homeostasis or the system’s equilibrium.system’s equilibrium.

Terms (cont.)Terms (cont.)HOMEOSTASIS--EQUILIBRIUMHOMEOSTASIS--EQUILIBRIUM

Some examples of family patterns: Some examples of family patterns: Distancer-Pursuer DyadDistancer-Pursuer Dyad

Often the roles that various family members take on are Often the roles that various family members take on are related to one another. For example, consider the related to one another. For example, consider the distancer-pursuer dyad (a dyad is just a group of two distancer-pursuer dyad (a dyad is just a group of two people).people).Sometimes in a relationship, there may be one person who Sometimes in a relationship, there may be one person who seeks out closeness with the other person (the pursuer) seeks out closeness with the other person (the pursuer) while his/her partner (the distancer) wants more space or while his/her partner (the distancer) wants more space or independence and pulls back from the relationship. independence and pulls back from the relationship. This pattern might occur in the marital relationship but This pattern might occur in the marital relationship but might also occur in the parent-child relationship. Outside might also occur in the parent-child relationship. Outside the family, you might see this pattern in dating the family, you might see this pattern in dating relationships or even in close friendships.relationships or even in close friendships.

Distancer-Pursuer Dyad Distancer-Pursuer Dyad & Circular Causality& Circular Causality

As you might imagine, as the distancer & pursuer act As you might imagine, as the distancer & pursuer act out their “roles” within the relationship, a cycle can out their “roles” within the relationship, a cycle can develop. develop. – The pursuer pushes for closeness while the The pursuer pushes for closeness while the

distancer pulls back.distancer pulls back.– The pursuer then feels “abandoned” and thus The pursuer then feels “abandoned” and thus

feels even more even more of a need for feels even more even more of a need for connection & so pushes even harder for connection & so pushes even harder for connection.connection.

– As a result, the distancer feels “smothered” and As a result, the distancer feels “smothered” and pulls away even more…pulls away even more…

– ……and so on & so forth…..a cycle!and so on & so forth…..a cycle!

Distancer-Pursuer Dyad Distancer-Pursuer Dyad & Circular Causality& Circular Causality

One might ask: How do they get in the cycle? Who One might ask: How do they get in the cycle? Who starts it?starts it?Family systems theory sees this question as like the Family systems theory sees this question as like the question: “What came first? The chicken or the question: “What came first? The chicken or the egg?” egg?” Just as the “chicken & the egg” question is Just as the “chicken & the egg” question is impossible to answer, it may impossible to say impossible to answer, it may impossible to say whether the “distancer” or the “pursuer” started it! whether the “distancer” or the “pursuer” started it! But in the cycle, BOTH patterns cause the OTHERBut in the cycle, BOTH patterns cause the OTHERFamily systems theorists refer to this concept as Family systems theorists refer to this concept as circular causality.circular causality.

Distancer-Pursuer Dyad Distancer-Pursuer Dyad & Circular Causality& Circular Causality

Circular causalityCircular causality refers to the fact that in refers to the fact that in family systems, each family member’s family systems, each family member’s behavior is caused by and causes the other behavior is caused by and causes the other family members’ behaviors. They are each family members’ behaviors. They are each impacting the other, in a circular manner. impacting the other, in a circular manner.

Some examples of family patterns:Some examples of family patterns: Overfunctioner-Underfunctioner DyadOverfunctioner-Underfunctioner Dyad

Another example of circular causality is the Another example of circular causality is the overfunctioner-underfunctioner dyadoverfunctioner-underfunctioner dyadIn the overfunctioner-underfunctioner dyad, one member In the overfunctioner-underfunctioner dyad, one member of the couple (the overfunctioner) is very responsible. of the couple (the overfunctioner) is very responsible. This person wants things to be planned out. In contrast, This person wants things to be planned out. In contrast, the other member of the couple (the underfunctioner) the other member of the couple (the underfunctioner) may be less responsible, more fun-loving, more may be less responsible, more fun-loving, more spontaneous, etc. spontaneous, etc. Imagine a married couple as they deal with finances in Imagine a married couple as they deal with finances in the family. The overfunctioner thinks that its important to the family. The overfunctioner thinks that its important to budget and to stay within a budget. The underfunctioner budget and to stay within a budget. The underfunctioner thinks that sometimes you just have to be willing to thinks that sometimes you just have to be willing to splurge and enjoy!splurge and enjoy!

Some examples of family patterns:Some examples of family patterns: Overfunctioner-Underfunctioner DyadOverfunctioner-Underfunctioner Dyad

The overfunctioner tends to see the The overfunctioner tends to see the underfunctioner as irresponsible and immature.underfunctioner as irresponsible and immature.The underfunctioner tends to see the The underfunctioner tends to see the overfunctioner as controlling & rigid.overfunctioner as controlling & rigid.Just as we saw in the distancer-pursuer Just as we saw in the distancer-pursuer relationship, the more the overfunctioner relationship, the more the overfunctioner overfunctions, the more the underfunctioner (in overfunctions, the more the underfunctioner (in reaction) will tend to underfunction, AND VICE reaction) will tend to underfunction, AND VICE VERSAVERSAThe causality is circular! Once the cycle has The causality is circular! Once the cycle has started, each person’s behavior contributes to started, each person’s behavior contributes to the other person’s behavior.the other person’s behavior.

Circular causalityCircular causality

The distancer-pursuer and overfunctioner-The distancer-pursuer and overfunctioner-underfunctioner are just two examples of the underfunctioner are just two examples of the sorts of circular patterns that can develop in sorts of circular patterns that can develop in families. There are many other possibilities.families. There are many other possibilities.

A good clue to a “circular” pattern is when A good clue to a “circular” pattern is when people tend to respond in predictable ways people tend to respond in predictable ways to each other, and their responses may to each other, and their responses may become more extreme or even “stubborn” become more extreme or even “stubborn” over time.over time.

A Question to PonderA Question to Ponder

What “circular” patterns have you seen in your What “circular” patterns have you seen in your own family or other relationships? own family or other relationships?

Homeostasis & EquilibriumHomeostasis & Equilibrium

Remember that we talked about how “systems” Remember that we talked about how “systems” are resistant to change?are resistant to change?According to systems theory, this is true EVEN According to systems theory, this is true EVEN IF the change might seem to be a desirable one!IF the change might seem to be a desirable one!For example, if the “distancer” within a For example, if the “distancer” within a relationship tries to work at taking the initiative to relationship tries to work at taking the initiative to seek out connection within the relationship, the seek out connection within the relationship, the “pursuer” may --in perhaps unintended, “pursuer” may --in perhaps unintended, subconscious ways---sabotage the distancer’s subconscious ways---sabotage the distancer’s attempts to change.attempts to change.

Family Systems & The Cultural-Family Systems & The Cultural-Systemic ApproachSystemic Approach

In conclusion, the Family Systems approach In conclusion, the Family Systems approach suggests that sometimes our behavior may have suggests that sometimes our behavior may have AS MUCH TO DO with the “systems” (groups) of AS MUCH TO DO with the “systems” (groups) of which we are a part—and the patterns that get which we are a part—and the patterns that get established within these systems-- as it may established within these systems-- as it may have to do with the personality of each person have to do with the personality of each person within the system.within the system.This is a very different explanation to what This is a very different explanation to what shapes human behavior than many of the other shapes human behavior than many of the other perspectives we have looked at in class thus far.perspectives we have looked at in class thus far.

Applying what you’ve learned!Applying what you’ve learned!

Write a short brief about your own familyWrite a short brief about your own familyOr any family that you know very close ( you Or any family that you know very close ( you

should be able to understand your should be able to understand your client’s family in the future when you deal client’s family in the future when you deal with them any way) with them any way)

Using some of the insights / concepts Using some of the insights / concepts that you have learned that you have learned

( for the next week class- we can share ( for the next week class- we can share some)some)