Volume 4.1 — February 2013

®

By Fred SmithPresidentThe Gathering

If you sometimes feel the joy of giving is

eluding you, you are not alone. Over the past 20 years, we’ve had the opportunity to interact with hundreds of individuals, couples and families and have discovered many issues that affect their philanthropy. While each individual’s and family’s situation is unique, we have found fi ve challenges to be almost universal.

TimeThe source of the most frustration for giving families is the lack of time to commit to the giving process. Good giving is work and takes a commitment of time and energy. Most donors have not given their philanthropy much thought and do

not know what their focus needs to be. Therefore, many opt to simply give reactively to a wide assortment of ministries and organizations, or succumb to pressure from others.

Family TaxEveryone knows the family pays a price for business success, and yet everyone is surprised by having to work through those issues before they can begin to give effectively. Oftentimes, the spouse and children feel they were not as important as the business and are not as excited about the new business of foundation giving.

Communication and TrustTypically, the spouse and children do not know the full extent of the family wealth and are initially at a disadvantage in making decisions about giving. This can complicate giving until things are on the table and

talked through. Assumptions about the children’s and grandchildren’s values are not always correct. It’s the shared values that make family foundations work.

Looking Like an AmateurExtraordinary competence created the wealth, and nothing is as painful to competent people as looking like an amateur or making obvious mistakes. Sometimes making serious errors in judgment about people and organizations early on destroys their confi dence and keeps them from persevering.

RelationshipsFamilies want to be taken seriously by organizations and to be accepted as “players.” However, sometimes they are unaware or resentful of how long it takes to earn infl uence and respect based on something other than being a donor.

Five Challenges of Family Philanthropy

What’s InsideCheating TimeMaking the most of each moment

Your Ethical WillSetting a values foundation for generations to come

Technical TipSimplify your estate plan in 2013

Taking the Time to Plan to GiveHelpful tips on how to make giving a priority

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Your Ethical Will: How to Pass Values with Valuables

By Pam Pugh, CEO Reaching Forward, LLC

An ethical will is a unique personal legacy document. While a traditional

will gives instructions for passing tangible valuables to others, an ethical will records

and passes personal values to subsequent generations that are an important part of your legacy.

Your thoughts, feelings, values, wisdom and advice can serve as a fi rm foundation for generations to come. It can bring great peace of mind knowing that what needs to be said will indeed be preserved and shared even when you aren’t able to do so yourself.

On the right you will fi nd a few questions to help you write your ethical will. For a full list of questions and a document template, please contact Focus on the Family at: FocusGiftPlanning@fotf.org.

ContextWhom do I want to talk with in my ethical will? Typically this is children, grandchildren or other family members. You might even include charities or others that are important to you.

Faith and ValuesWhat values have you sought to live by and would like to instill in your children, grandchildren or others?

Life LessonsWhat have your life experiences taught you that others would fi nd benefi cial?

MemoriesWhat have been some of your happiest and most joyful moments in life?

FutureAre there particular traditions or gifts that you would want the next generation to consider making in the future?

TECHNICAL TIPSimplify Your Estate Plan in 2013

By Jeanne McMainsVice President National Christian Foundation Serving Focus on the Family

With the ink still drying on the American Taxpayer Relief Act, families now have clarity on how the

estate tax system will work in future years. The act made permanent the $5 million per person estate tax exemption and the portability of any unused exemption from one spouse to another. As a result, many families will be updating their estate plans in 2013 to simplify the complexity of their former estate tax planning.

If you fi nd yourself updating your plan this year, you might want to also consider the following simple ways other families have included charity in their estate designs.

Add charity as an additional “child” in the division of your estate Tom and Mary are dividing their estate into four equal shares and will give a quarter share to each of their three children and the fi nal quarter share to the charities they love.

Fund a charitable gift annuity (CGA) for your childMark and Susan want to provide their child with a lifetime income. They plan to leave part of their child’s inheritance to a CGA that will pay income to their child and then give the remaining proceeds to charity upon their child’s death.

Creating a charitable inheritance for your childWanting to encourage her children’s own giving, Jenny has directed that 10 percent of each child’s inheritance shall be given to the charities her child chooses.

Please call us at 1-800-782-8227 or email us at FocusGiftPlanning@fotf.org if you would like to learn more about creative and simple ways to expand the impact of your estate design for your family and beyond.

DID YOU KNOW?It is estimated that 70% of wealth transitions fail by the end of the 2nd generation and 91% fail by the end of the 3rd generation. In the absence of a vision for the family, professionals’ default focus is on wealth preservation, tax minimization and control, which leads to advisors failing to address the very issues that cause the wealth transition to fail.**Preparing Heirs: Five Steps to a Successful Transition of Family Wealth and Values by Roy Williams and Vic Preisser

Cheating Time: Making the Most of Each Moment

By Royce Bervig Senior Gift Planning Officer Focus on the Family

The calendar has rolled over to 2013. What’s

ahead for your family? Living in an age of access and mobility, our choices and opportunities abound, creating noise and extreme busyness. I recently heard a speaker introduce a challenge to choose the best over the good so that we can prioritize family and “cheat” the other things.

Indeed, Scripture implores us to make the most of our time today, as tomorrow carries no guarantees. But somehow time seems to

slip away from us. Sometimes the things that need to be said or discussed are upstaged by pressing tasks.

In this edition of FamilyWise, we hope to offer a few ideas to ease the pressures of time and allow margin to focus on your family, to help as you intentionally build your faith and values into your family life and experience great joy in your stewardship. Additional resources are available at: FocusOnTheFamily.com/Parenting/Building_Relationships

“Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12, NIV

Volume 4.1 — February 2013

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Your Ethical Will: How to Pass Values with Valuables

By Pam Pugh, CEO Reaching Forward, LLC

An ethical will is a unique personal legacy document. While a traditional

will gives instructions for passing tangible valuables to others, an ethical will records

and passes personal values to subsequent generations that are an important part of your legacy.

Your thoughts, feelings, values, wisdom and advice can serve as a fi rm foundation for generations to come. It can bring great peace of mind knowing that what needs to be said will indeed be preserved and shared even when you aren’t able to do so yourself.

On the right you will fi nd a few questions to help you write your ethical will. For a full list of questions and a document template, please contact Focus on the Family at: FocusGiftPlanning@fotf.org.

ContextWhom do I want to talk with in my ethical will? Typically this is children, grandchildren or other family members. You might even include charities or others that are important to you.

Faith and ValuesWhat values have you sought to live by and would like to instill in your children, grandchildren or others?

Life LessonsWhat have your life experiences taught you that others would fi nd benefi cial?

MemoriesWhat have been some of your happiest and most joyful moments in life?

FutureAre there particular traditions or gifts that you would want the next generation to consider making in the future?

TECHNICAL TIPSimplify Your Estate Plan in 2013

By Jeanne McMainsVice President National Christian Foundation Serving Focus on the Family

With the ink still drying on the American Taxpayer Relief Act, families now have clarity on how the

estate tax system will work in future years. The act made permanent the $5 million per person estate tax exemption and the portability of any unused exemption from one spouse to another. As a result, many families will be updating their estate plans in 2013 to simplify the complexity of their former estate tax planning.

If you fi nd yourself updating your plan this year, you might want to also consider the following simple ways other families have included charity in their estate designs.

Add charity as an additional “child” in the division of your estate Tom and Mary are dividing their estate into four equal shares and will give a quarter share to each of their three children and the fi nal quarter share to the charities they love.

Fund a charitable gift annuity (CGA) for your childMark and Susan want to provide their child with a lifetime income. They plan to leave part of their child’s inheritance to a CGA that will pay income to their child and then give the remaining proceeds to charity upon their child’s death.

Creating a charitable inheritance for your childWanting to encourage her children’s own giving, Jenny has directed that 10 percent of each child’s inheritance shall be given to the charities her child chooses.

Please call us at 1-800-782-8227 or email us at FocusGiftPlanning@fotf.org if you would like to learn more about creative and simple ways to expand the impact of your estate design for your family and beyond.

DID YOU KNOW?It is estimated that 70% of wealth transitions fail by the end of the 2nd generation and 91% fail by the end of the 3rd generation. In the absence of a vision for the family, professionals’ default focus is on wealth preservation, tax minimization and control, which leads to advisors failing to address the very issues that cause the wealth transition to fail.**Preparing Heirs: Five Steps to a Successful Transition of Family Wealth and Values by Roy Williams and Vic Preisser

Cheating Time: Making the Most of Each Moment

By Royce Bervig Senior Gift Planning Officer Focus on the Family

The calendar has rolled over to 2013. What’s

ahead for your family? Living in an age of access and mobility, our choices and opportunities abound, creating noise and extreme busyness. I recently heard a speaker introduce a challenge to choose the best over the good so that we can prioritize family and “cheat” the other things.

Indeed, Scripture implores us to make the most of our time today, as tomorrow carries no guarantees. But somehow time seems to

slip away from us. Sometimes the things that need to be said or discussed are upstaged by pressing tasks.

In this edition of FamilyWise, we hope to offer a few ideas to ease the pressures of time and allow margin to focus on your family, to help as you intentionally build your faith and values into your family life and experience great joy in your stewardship. Additional resources are available at: FocusOnTheFamily.com/Parenting/Building_Relationships

“Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12, NIV

Volume 4.1 — February 2013

FOTF100301-7-328214_FamilyWise_13Feb_Newsletter_DISK.indd 2-3 1/14/13 5:42 PM

CONTACT US 1-800-782-8227

FocusGiftPlanning@fotf.org

FocusGiftPlanning.com

© 2013 Focus on the FamilyFocusOnTheFamily.com

Taking the Time to Plan to Give

By Terry ParkerFounder and Chairman EmeritusNational Christian Foundation

For many of us to properly handle the blessing of giving we have to prioritize the process with our many other time consuming obligations.

To give, we must try to accomplish at least three things. First, we have to choose the ministries from a list of many worthy ones. Second, we have to decide on the amount, the frequency and if there will be a terminating point of any regular gifts. Third, we need to decide the results expected, and what reporting and/or follow up will be required.

In order to not confl ict with other responsibilities and properly accomplish these goals, a friend of mine confi ded in me the procedure he and his wife have established to simplify the process and make it less time consuming. Here’s what they do:

1. They have one major gift planning meeting each year, usually right after Thanksgiving.Since they mainly make yearly commitments, they have a good idea of the income they expect in the next year, and thus the total amount they want to give.

2. They go to their donor-advised fund and schedule monthly gifts as well as the larger annual gifts. These larger gifts are scheduled later in the year so that everything doesn’t go out in January. A portion is left uncommitted so that as the year progresses, they can add a ministry they were not prepared to include at Thanksgiving or didn’t yet know about.

3. They ask each one of their three adult children to be responsible for at least one of the major gifts. Knowing that one day the children will have greater giving responsibilities, they use this to gauge their children’s interest and to instruct through family giving. To encourage them, each child is given an additional amount to give to ministries of their own choosing.

4. To make the entire process more easily accomplished, they try to limit the major gifts to just three or four and attend at least one of the donor retreats of these ministries, so that they can be certain of the amount they want to give. For the others, they will rely on their children, ministry newsletters and personal visits from ministry representatives.

The one great advantage of their system, they feel, is that they can honestly say to any ministry who might approach them that they normally only consider new ministries after Thanksgiving, and that they are already committed for the current year. For them, God has honored this process and given them a peace of mind about the choices they have made.

God has not called any of us to give to every ministry that comes to our attention, but rather, He expects each of us to develop a reasonable process to use in fi nding the ones He wants us to support.

Volume 4.1 — February 2013

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