for preview only · place: a shoemaker’s home and workshop in the country of woozle, city of...

Book by Karen Boettcher-TateMusic and lyrics by Bill Francoeur

© Copyright 2008, Pioneer Drama Service, Inc.

Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned that a royalty must be paid for every performance, whether or not admission is charged. All inquiries regarding rights should be addressed to Pioneer Drama Service, Inc., PO Box 4267, Englewood, CO 80155.

All rights to this musical—including but not limited to amateur, professional, radio broadcast, television, motion picture, public reading and translation into foreign languages—are controlled by Pioneer Drama Service, Inc., without whose permission no performance, reading or presentation of any kind in whole or in part may be given.

These rights are fully protected under the copyright laws of the United States of America and of all countries covered by the Universal Copyright Convention or with which the United States has reciprocal copyright relations, including Canada, Mexico, Australia and all nations of the United Kingdom.

COPYING OR REPRODUCING ALL OR ANY PART OF THIS BOOK IN ANY MANNER IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN BY LAW.

On all programs, printing and advertising, the following information must appear:

1. The full name of the musical2. The full name of the playwright and composer/arranger3. The following notice: “Produced by special arrangement with

Pioneer Drama Service, Inc., Englewood, Colorado”

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THE ELVES AND THE SHOEMAKERTHE MUSICAL

Book by KAREN BOETTCHER-TATEMusic and lyrics by BILL FRANCOEUR

CAST OF CHARACTERS(In Order of Appearance)

# of lines

MATILDA COBBLESTONE ............shoemaker’s wife; round 120 and happy

LOCKHART COBBLESTONE .........the shoemaker; funny and 124 endearing

SNEERELLA TWERM ..................the landlady; this woman is 29 MEAN. She even looks mean.

OLD LADY/FAIRY PRINCESS .......as the old lady, this character 13 is very old, mysterious and magical; as the princess, she is everything a beautiful princess should be

MORTZ .....................................leader of the elf brigade 23SCHWARTZ ...............................part of the elf brigade 14HAZEL ......................................same 12GRACIE .....................................same 15STUDEBAKER ............................same; has his own ideas 15MRS. SNOOTBOTTOM ................large, huffy, very rich society 19

womanMAYOR CLANKBATTLE ................loud, kind politician 15LORETTA LE POINTE ...................flighty, exotic prima ballerina 15WIDOW PERKINS .......................tiny, frail old lady; kind and 7

caringZOOM CORRIGAN ......................Olympic runner, very fit, very 9

handsome and very fastEXTRAS ....................................as CHORUS OF TOWNSPEOPLE,

including a POLICEMAN

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SETTING

Time: One evening, a long time ago.Place: A shoemaker’s home and workshop in the country of Woozle,

city of Clankbottom.The stage represents a poor shoemaker’s shop. A large work table is situated at an angle STAGE RIGHT, with several stools around it. There is a door to the street UP CENTER and windows on either side. A display shelf is situated under each window. There is a large fireplace against the STAGE LEFT wall, and a cooking pot is on the fire. There is a chair on either side of fireplace, DOWN and UP LEFT. An EXIT to the bedroom is DOWN LEFT, the EXIT to the storeroom is DOWN RIGHT. The room is cozy and clean but shabby. There is a sign in the window, “Lockhart Cobblestone, Shoemaker.”See set design on page 32.

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SEQUENCE OF MUSICAL NUMBERS

MC 1 The Elves and the Shoemaker—Prologue ...........................................Ensemble

MC 2 Doodle-ee .........................................Lockhart, MatildaMC 2a Sneerella’s Entrance Music ................Instrumental MC 3 Enough, Enough! (Out You Go) ............Sneerella, Lockhart,

MatildaMC 3a The Old Lady .....................................Instrumental (with

offstage voices)MC 4 March, March, March .........................ElvesMC 5 They’re Wonderful ..............................Snootbottom,

Lockhart, MatildaMC 5a Sneerella’s Entrance Music ................InstrumentalMC 5b March, March, March—Reprise ..........ElvesMC 5c They’re Wonderful—Reprise ...............Loretta, Mayor,

Lockhart, Matilda, Townspeople

MC 5d March, March, March—Reprise ..........ElvesMC 5e The Old Lady .....................................Instrumental (with

offstage voices)MC 6 Bless This House ..............................Princess, Offstage

ChorusMC 6a Sneerella’s Entrance Music ................InstrumentalMC 6b The Spell ..........................................Instrumental (with

offstage voices)MC 6c The Elves and the Shoemaker—

Epilogue ...........................................EnsembleMC 6d Curtain Call—March, March,

March ..............................................InstrumentalMC 6e Bless This House—Optional Choral

Finale ...............................................Ensemble

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THE ELVES AND THE SHOEMAKERTHE MUSICAL

PROLOGUEBEFORE AT RISE: MUSIC CUE 1: “The Elves and the Shoemaker—Prologue.” HOUSE LIGHTS DOWN. ENSEMBLE ENTERS in the dark DOWN LEFT and RIGHT in front of the curtain. Actors should be positioned in a tableau so the ENSEMBLE appears in silhouette form. LIGHTS UP DIM.ENSEMBLE GIRLS: (Sing.) Ooo. Ooo.

Secretly they come when all are fast asleep.Quietly they enter without a peep.

ENSEMBLE BOYS: (Sing.) Toiling they work long into the night.Magically they disappear by morning light.

ALL: (Sing.) All things joyous and wonderful,All things strange and mysterious,Come now, we’ll tell you the tale of theElves and the shoemaker.

ENSEMBLE GIRLS: (Sing.) Ah. Ah.Tra-la-la, they sing, merrily they dance.When the moon is full, how they do entrance.

ENSEMBLE BOYS: (Sing.)Joyfully they work till the task is done.Suddenly a miracle by morning sun.


ENSEMBLE GIRLS: (Sing.) Ooo. Ooo. Ooo. (MUSIC OUT.)End of PROLOGUE

Scene OneAT RISE: The room is empty. Direct segue into MUSIC CUE 2: “Doodle-ee.” Happy and bright, MATILDA COBBLESTONE ENTERS DOWN LEFT. She carries a large ladle. She is neat, but her dress is patched. She is a bit of a blitherer, but endearing and funny. She crosses to the fireplace and stirs the soup.MATILDA: (Speaks.) Lockhart! What are you doing! (Crosses DOWN

RIgHT and bellows.) LOCKHART COBBLESTONE! (Crosses once more to the fireplace.)

LOCKHART: (OFF DOWN RIgHT; speaks.) Coming, my little primrose!MATILDA: (Sings.) ’Tis a lovely morning.

Roses in the air.

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Hear the birdies singing.There’s music everywhere!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee!La la la la la la la!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doo!Dum dum dum dum wicky snatchit!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee!La la la la la la la!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doo! (Sees a little tear in her dress.) Got to mend and patch it! (MUSIC UNDER. LOCKHART ENTERS DOWN RIgHT. He is a funny little man, with wild hair and glasses perched on his nose. He too wears clothes that have seen better days. He carries a pair of shoes.)

LOCKHART: (Speaks.) Look! They’re finished! A great job, if I do say so myself! (MATILDA crosses to LOCKHART at CENTER, takes the shoes.)

MATILDA: (Doing a little happy-tappy step. Speaks.) Lockhart, my little goat’s beard, they’re wonderful! (The two lean toward each other and pucker up. They don’t actually kiss, but make kissing noises in unison three times. This peculiar little ritual is repeated at various times throughout the play—almost as punctuation when needed.)

LOCKHART: (Speaks.) Matilda, my little raspberry bucket, I feel GREAT! (Does a little happy-tappy step.) These will sell in a jiffy, and we’ll be back on our feet again! (MATILDA crosses to UP LEFT window with shoes, places them on the display shelf. Sings.)’Tis a lovely morning.Good fortune’s in the air,No more going hungry,We’ll be rich, I swear!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee!La la la la la la la!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doo!Dum dum dum dum wicky snatchit!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee!La la la la la la la!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doo!I’ll make a pair to match it!

MATILDA/LOCKHART: (Sing.)Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee!La la la la la la la!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doo!Dum dum dum dum wicky snatchit!

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Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee!La la la la la la la!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doo!’Tis a lovely day!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doodle-ee!Doodle-ee, doodle-ee, doo!Good fortune’s on our way! (MUSIC OUT.)

LOCKHART: No more soup for us! When we sell these shoes we’ll have enough money to buy a gigantic turkeybird and still have enough left to buy two pieces of leather. Then we’ll get TWO turkeybirds and FOUR pieces of leather, and then we’ll get THREE turkeybirds…

MATILDA: Better not count your turkeybirds before they hatch, my little creampuff!

LOCKHART: You’re right! I feel so GOOD! (MATILDA and LOCKHART laugh and twirl each other around. MUSIC CUE 2a: “Sneerella’s Entrance Music.” We see a figure pass by the window from UP RIgHT. The door flies open and into the room comes SNEERELLA TWERM, the landlady. This is one nasty woman, and she looks just as nasty as she is. She is large and imposing, and certainly not the sort of person you’d want to know. LOCKHART and MATILDA freeze. MUSIC OUT.)

SNEERELLA: Well, well, well! What have we here? Happiness? I loathe, despise and hate happiness. Besides, you have nothing to be happy about.

MATILDA: (Very nervous, approaching SNEERELLA.) Uh… can I offer you some gloop? I mean, stoop? SOUP! SOUP!

LOCKHART: Right! Have some poop! I MEAN SOUP!SNEERELLA: Silence! (A loud gulp from MATILDA and LOCKHART.)

Better, but no cigar.LOCKHART: (Trying to joke.) I don’t smoke. (Makes a feeble attempt

at laughter.)SNEERELLA: Quiet, you birdbrain.MATILDA/LOCKHART: Sorry.SNEERELLA: The loan that you got from me is due tomorrow! (Sneering

her Sneerella sneer.) And unless you can come up with the twenty dracholas you owe me, you will be out on your collective ears.

MATILDA: But, Sneerella…SNEERELLA: That’s MIZZ Twerm to you!MATILDA: MIZZ Flerm… I mean Germ… I mean TWERM! You said we

would have a month to pay back the money.SNEERELLA: I changed by mind.

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MATILDA: Why?SNEERELLA: I felt like it.MATILDA: But, we needed food and supplies and…SNEERELLA: Can it! I don’t want to hear your sob story, sister.LOCKHART: (Pulling himself together.) Never fear! (Crosses to the

window, picks up the shoes.) I have just finished making the best pair of shoes I’ve ever made. (Crosses DOWNSTAgE to SNEERELLA.) We’ll have the money by tomorrow.

SNEERELLA: (Laughing wildly.) I won’t hold my breath!MATILDA: But, Sneerella…SNEERELLA: WHAT?MATILDA: Sorry… Ms. Worm.. uh… Twerm… (MUSIC CUE 3:

“Enough, Enough! [Out You go]”)SNEERELLA: (Speaks.) Don’t grovel. I hate groveling.MATILDA: (Speaks.) But, but…SNEERELLA: (Sings.)

Why do people hate me so when all I want to doIs have a little business on the side?Make a little money, have a condo with a view.But everywhere I go I’m brushed aside!Enough, enough! Out you go!Gather your clutter and pack your junk.Enough, enough! Don’t be slow!Time to hit the road!

LOCKHART: (Speaks; tries to muster up some courage.) Now see here…

SNEERELLA: (Sings.) Enough, enough! Don’t waste my time!Remove this rubbish and pack your trunk.Enough, enough! (Wiping her finger on the table.)Clean this grime.(Shakes her head; to herself.) Slow as a bloated toad.

LOCKHART: (Sings.) Where will we go? What will we do?MATILDA: (Sings; to herself.) Seems this day is not so sunny.LOCKHART: (Sings.) Give us another chance. We’ll truly pay.MATILDA: (Sings.) We have shoes, splendid shoes.LOCKHART: (Sings.) Bound to make us lots of money.SNEERELLA: (Sings.) Stop this whining, just be on your way.

Enough, enough! Out you go!And take those wretched, ugly shoes!Enough, enough! (Speaks; sarcastic.) Tally-ho!(Sings.) Pack your mess and leave!

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MATILDA: (Sings.) What can we say? What can we do?How can we make you understand?We haven’t anywhere at all to go.

SNEERELLA: (Speaks.) That’s not MY problem!LOCKHART: (Sings.) Give us a day, one more day.

You’ll have every cent in hand.SNEERELLA: (Sings.) Enough, I say! The final answer’s no!

Enough, enough! Out you go!No discussion. Cut the squawk!Enough, enough of this (Speaks.) tale of woe!No more idle talk.

LOCKHART: (Speaks in rhythm.) But…SNEERELLA: (Sings.) Pack your things and walk!MATILDA: (Speaks in rhythm.) But…SNEERELLA: (Sings.) Quick, you’re on the clock! (MUSIC OUT.) I’ll tell

you what. Never let it be said that Sneerella Twerm isn’t charitable, though I hate that word! I will give you until tomorrow morning to pay what you owe me. If that money is not in my hot little hands by then it will be… no more house, no more shoes, bye bye, Cobblestones! Got it? (LOCKHART and MATILDA sadly nod. SNEERELLA sweeps out the door UP CENTER. MATILDA and LOCKHART are frozen.)

MATILDA: What are we going to do?LOCKHART: Don’t worry, my little artichoke heart. These shoes will

bring in more than enough to pay back the loan. (Replaces shoes in window, then crosses to MATILDA.) We’ll have enough left over to buy more leather and a turkeybird too… maybe not a GIGANTIC one, but a plumpty-do one.

MATILDA: Really?LOCKHART: Really!MATILDA: (Jumps up, clicks her heels.) Whoopee!LOCKHART: (Clicks his heels.) Whoopee! (Smack, smack, smack. The

form of a mysterious OLD LADY is seen outside the window. She moves very slowly and pauses by the door. She is wearing a very ragged, hooded cape, and she has no shoes on. She looks as if she is about to collapse. MATILDA and LOCKHART step back as the OLD LADY ENTERS the room. They see that she is ill and race to support her. They help her to the DOWN LEFT chair.)

MATILDA: Oh, my goodness… here, come in out of the cold.LOCKHART: Sit down, sit down. Are you all right?OLD LADY: (Very creaky voiced, very weary.) Thank you. Thank you,

friends.

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MATILDA: (Hovering over her.) What can we get you?OLD LADY: I just need to rest for a bit. I’m so very tired.LOCKHART: SOUP! She needs soup!MATILDA: (Rushes to the fireplace, takes a cup from off the mantel

and ladles soup into it. She gives it to the OLD LADY.) Here, please. I’m sorry the soup is so thin… only one potato, one carrot and a pea.

LOCKHART: But, it’s hot and it’s good…OLD LADY: (Eating as quickly as she can.) Thank you. Thank you.

(LOCKHART motions MATILDA DOWN RIgHT to confer. The OLD LADY continues to eat.)

LOCKHART: She’s almost starved.MATILDA: The poor thing.LOCKHART: She looks like she’s traveled a great distance.MATILDA: Let’s ask her to stay with us.LOCKHART: Of course! We can make up an extra bed in the

storeroom.MATILDA: Perfect! (Both scurry up to the OLD LADY.) You look so

tired… we were wondering…LOCKHART: Would you, could you, stay with us for a few days?OLD LADY: You’re very kind but I have a great distance to travel, and

I must go.MATILDA/LOCKHART: Please!OLD LADY: Thank you, but you’ve done enough already.LOCKHART: (Motions MATILDA DOWN RIgHT, and they confer

animatedly.) Look at her shoes!MATILDA: She doesn’t have any!LOCKHART: That’s what I mean!MATILDA: Oh, Lockhart, I think I’m going to puddle up and weep

a thousand quarts. (They both have the same idea at the same time.)

LOCKHART/MATILDA: THE SHOES! (MATILDA scurries to the window and gets the shoes. They cross to the OLD LADY.)

MATILDA: If you have a long distance to go, you’ve got to have shoes!

LOCKHART: Can’t walk on your bare tootsies.MATILDA: Might step on a nail.LOCKHART: Might step on a gopher.MATILDA: Try them on.

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OLD LADY: Oh, no, I couldn’t possibly.MATILDA: We won’t take “no” for an answer. (LOCKHART kneels to

place shoes on the OLD LADY’S feet.)OLD LADY: Oh my, they feel so good.MATILDA: You’ll be able to walk a million miles in those.OLD LADY: (Starts to get up, is still a bit shaky. MATILDA and LOCKHART

assist her.) Somehow, I will repay you for this.LOCKHART: No need. Just pass it along.OLD LADY: Pass it along?LOCKHART: You know, when you can, just give somebody else a little

something.OLD LADY: I will. And now, I must say good-bye. Thank you again.

(MATILDA and LOCKHART cross with her to the door.)MATILDA: Be careful! And if you’re ever in our little town of Clankbottom

again, come and see us.LOCKHART: Good walking! (OLD LADY EXITS UP CENTER and crosses

behind window OFF UP LEFT. MATILDA and LOCKHART stand at door and watch her go, wave, and when she is out of sight, cross DOWN CENTER.)

MATILDA: I wish she would have stayed.LOCKHART: Me too, my little snicker doodle. Well, maybe the shoes

will help. (They turn and stare at one another, mouths open.)MATILDA/LOCKHART: THE SHOES!MATILDA: Oh no!LOCKHART: Oops!MATILDA: What are we going to do?LOCKHART: Oops!MATILDA: Oh dear! Oh deary, deary, groan.LOCKHART: Oops!MATILDA: Don’t just oops! What are we going to do for the money?!LOCKHART: Do we have an alarm clock?MATILDA: I don’t think they’ve been invented yet… but, the neighbors

have a rooster.LOCKHART: Then set the rooster for five o’clock.MATILDA: Why?LOCKHART: I have to get up and make another pair of shoes.MATILDA: There’s no more leather.LOCKHART: I wasn’t going to tell you this, but I have another bit of

leather that I was keeping for… well, drat it all… I was going to

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make you a special pair of shoes for your birthday. (EXITS DOWN RIgHT quickly and returns with a piece of leather.)

MATILDA: Oh, Lockhart.LOCKHART: Oh, my little pumpkin pie, I’ll make you another pair. I

promise. (Places leather on table.)MATILDA: It doesn’t matter. It’s the thought that counts. You know

that.LOCKHART: (Yawning.) But, now, my little poopsie, I think it’s time to

sleep.MATILDA: Tomorrow is another day! (They EXIT DOWN LEFT. (MUSIC

CUE 3a: “The Old Lady.” [NOTE: See MUSIC SCORE for background “oohs” and “ahhs.”] The OLD LADY ENTERS quietly UP LEFT and crosses to the UP CENTER door. She sneaks into the room and stands CENTER. She spreads her arms in a mysterious fashion, then whirls around. She might scatter glitter or confetti. Any way you look at it, it’s pretty weird. She then leaves the same way she came in. MUSIC OUT. All is quiet for a second then… DIRECT SEgUE to MUSIC CUE 4: “March, March, March.” We hear the sound of giggles. Into the room from various points march five ELVES, who look a bit daft. They wear long underwear and are barefoot. During the song, they scurry around the room poking here and there exploring, touching, pointing, talking to each other…)

ALL ELVES: (Sing.) March, march, march! We are the elf brigade!March, march, march! Here comes the elf parade!When the house is fast asleep, we quickly enter one by one.All night long without a peep,We stitch and sew until the shoes are done! (MUSIC UNDER. MORTZ spies the leather on the table and jumps up onto the table.)

MORTZ: (Speaks.) Looky and see what I found.SCHWARTZ: (Crossing to table. Speaks.) Mortz, is it what I thinks it is?HAZEL: (Jumping up and down. Speaks.) Goody, goody orange juice!

Goody, goody orange juice!GRACIE: (Dancing about. Speaks.) I knewed it! I knewed it! I KNEWED

we had a job to do!STUDEBAKER: (Speaks.) It’s nice and warm in here.MORTZ: (Speaks.) Roll call!GRACIE: (Speaks.) What do you mean, roll call? We be all here an’

accounted for. Is we all here, elves?STUDEBAKER: (Speaks.) I is here.MORTZ: (Speaks.) You KNOW we gots to have a roll call. It’s the way

of the elves, and that’s the way it is! (The ELVES line up, military

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style. Each calls out his or her name. MUSIC UP. Speaks in rhythm.) Mortz!

SCHWARTZ: (Speaks in rhythm.) Schwartz!HAZEL: (Speaks in rhythm.) Hazel!GRACIE: (Speaks in rhythm.) Gracie!STUDEBAKER: (Speaks in rhythm.) Studebaker!ALL: (Speak in rhythm.) All present and accounted for!

(Sing.) March, march, march! We are the elf brigade!March, march, march! Here comes the elf parade!All night long, we snip and cut and in the morning disappear.We’s the fastest we does know as we cut, cut, tap, tap,Give a hearty cheer! (They cheer. MUSIC UNDER.)

MORTZ: (Speaks.) Good! Next step… make the shoes!GRACIE: (Speaks.) What kind?MORTZ: (Speaks.) Next step… what kind of shoes?GRACIE: (Speaks.) Dancing slippers?HAZEL: (Speaks.) Walking shoes?SCHWARTZ: (Speaks.) I want lady shoes!MORTZ: (Speaks.) I say boots!STUDEBAKER: (Speaks.) Running shoes?!ELVES: (Speaks.) RUNNING SHOES?!HAZEL: (Speaks.) Why would anybody want running shoes?GRACIE: (Speaks.) I never heard anything so silly. Running shoes?

(The ELVES laugh uproariously—all except STUDEBAKER. MUSIC UP.)

ALL ELVES: (Sing.) March, march, march! We are the elf brigade!March, march, march! Here comes the elf parade!Like a wizard casting spells, we love the magic that we do’s.How we do’s it, we won’t tells,As we cut, cut, tap, tap, a brand new pair of shoes! (MUSIC UNDER)

STUDEBAKER: (Speaks.) What’s wrong with running shoes?SCHWARTZ: (Speaks.) Studebaker, you ding-dong, nobody in the whole

world would ever buy shoes just for running.HAZEL: (Speaks.) Walking shoes.MORTZ: (Speaks.) Only one way to solve this here consternation. Elf

choosing time! (ELVES move in a semi-circle CENTER and begin the rock-scissors-paper game. [NOTE: This game should be played very quickly so as to move the song along.] The first time all have rock, the second time all have paper, and the third time all have paper

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except for SCHWARTZ, who throws scissors. SCHWARTZ leaps in the air, then dances around the room.)

SCHWARTZ: (Speaks.) I win! I win! We make lady shoes! Lady shoes!

STUDEBAKER: (Speaks.) I just thought running shoes would be nice.SCHWARTZ: (Speaks.) Nope! I win, fair and square.MORTZ: (Speaks.) Elf people… attention! Forward, ho! (MUSIC UP. The

ELVES get to work on the shoes. Some stitch on the leather, some work on the form with hammer and tacks. They work quickly and animatedly.)

ALL ELVES: (Sing.) Work, work, work, we does work all together,As we cut, cut, cut aways.Then we snip, snip, snip as we hook, loop and tether.While we stretch, stretch, the leather till it stays.Stitch, stitch, stitch, as we sews till the mornin’,And we tap, tap, tap them heels.Then we clean and we shine,The elfen ways!(LIgHT CHANgES to indicate passage of time.)Work, work, work, we does work all together,As we cut, cut, cut aways.Then we snip, snip, snip as we hook, loop and tether.while we stretch, stretch, the leather till it stays.Stitch, stitch, stitch, as we sews till the mornin’,And we tap, tap, tap them heels.Then we clean and we shine,Yes, we clean and we shine!Then we dance and we dine the elfen ways! (Laughter and chatter. MUSIC OUT. After the conclusion of the song, all ELVES move directly DOWNSTAgE of table, masking the work. SCHWARTZ stays UPSTAgE of table and so he can make the switch to the new, finished pair of shoes. They chatter for a bit after the song, and then, once the finished shoes are in place, SCHWARTZ holds them high.)

ELVES: Oooooo!SCHWARTZ: We dood it! Beautiful!HAZEL: Stooooopendous!MORTZ: Nifty!GRACIE: Tremendous!STUDEBAKER: (Sad.) I still thinks that running shoes would be nice.

(SOUND EFFECT: A ROOSTER CROWS.)GRACIE: Hark!SCHWARTZ: Hark? What you mean, “hark”?

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GRACIE: Morning is comin’.MORTZ: Oh, oh. Time to gets our elf-feet movin’! (ELVES scatter, EXIT

various directions. LIgHTS COME UP.)LOCKHART: (ENTERS DOWN LEFT. He is very sleepy. He stretches and

yawns, crosses to the fireplace and stokes the coals. Mutters to himself.) Now, let’s see… better get to work. Have to make those shoes. Make them fast, make them beautiful… (Crosses to the table where the new shoes are placed.) Have to make them as nice as these… as nice as these… good craftsmanship… excellent… as nice as… as nice as these! Help! Help! Help! Matilda! Help! I’ve been bewitched! (Backs away from the table to CENTER. He turns front, eyes wide. Every now and again he stares in disbelief at the new ones. MATILDA ENTERS quickly DOWN LEFT. LOCKHART clutches her in fear.)

MATILDA: What’s going on? Are you all right?LOCKHART: (Pointing to shoes.) Look!MATILDA: Why Lockhart, they’re beautiful. (Starts to pick them up.)LOCKHART: DON’T TOUCH THEM!MATILDA: Huh?LOCKHART: DON’T TOUCH THEM!MATILDA: Lockhart, don’t be silly. (Picks up the shoes. LOCKHART

hides his head as he anticipates the worst. Nothing happens.) How did you finish them so quickly?

LOCKHART: (Crosses hesitantly to the table.) I didn’t.MATILDA: But, they look finished. What needs to be done to them?LOCKHART: I… d-d-d-didn’t make them.MATILDA: I don’t think you’re awake yet.LOCKHART: But, I…MATILDA: I’ll tell you what happened, my little vitamin pill… you were

so tired when you got up, you made them in your sleep.LOCKHART: I did?MATILDA: Of course you did.LOCKHART: I don’t think…MATILDA: Of course you didn’t think. Your fingers just worked for you.LOCKHART: They did?MATILDA: They did! You’ve made so many shoes, your fingers can just

work by themselves.LOCKHART: They can?MATILDA: Nobody can make shoes like you can. These are of the

highest quality. They’re wonderful!

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LOCKHART: They are?MATILDA: I KNOW we can sell them, and then Sneerella will get her

money, and we will get a giant turkeybird.LOCKHART: We will!MATILDA: Whoopee!LOCKHART: Whoopee! (Smack, smack, smack.)MATILDA: (Carries shoes to window and places them on shelf.) There!

Just you wait! (MRS. SNOOTBOTTOM ENTERS above windows UP RIgHT. She moves into the shop. MATILDA crosses to her from STAgE LEFT and LOCKHART crosses to her from STAgE RIgHT. SNOOTBOTTOM is a large lady, very fashionable and very crabby. She walks slowly and carefully.)

LOCKHART: Good morning, Mrs. Snootbottom! What can we do for you today?

SNOOTBOTTOM: I need a good pair of walking shoes. Something comfortable. Something plain and practical. No-nonsense shoes.

MATILDA: (Crosses to the window and picks up the shoes, then carries them to SNOOTBOTTOM.) Lockhart has just finished these! Aren’t they beautiful?

SNOOTBOTTOM: Can’t you hear? I want something that is practical. Not party shoes.

LOCKHART: Won’t you try them on?SNOOTBOTTOM: NONSENSE! Shoes as pretty as these… (Sighs as

she looks at the shoes.) I had some like this when I was a young girl. Oh, how I wish…

MATILDA: (Steering SNOOTBOTTOM to chair DOWN LEFT.) Just try them on.

SNOOTBOTTOM: What good will it do? They’ll just be uncomfortable. My feet hurt all the time! My dancing days are over.

LOCKHART: Please…SNOOTBOTTOM: (As she sits in DOWN LEFT chair.) Get me another

kind IMMEDIATELY!LOCKHART: I’m sorry, Mrs. Snootbottom. We don’t have any other

shoes.SNOOTBOTTOM: WHAT?MATILDA: So, if you’ll just try these…SNOOTBOTTOM: (Snapping, irritable.) Oh, put them on! I know they’ll

pinch. I have hundreds of shoes in my wardrobe. In fact, I am an EXPERT on shoes and… (The shoes have been placed on her feet.) EGAD!

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LOCKHART: How do they feel?SNOOTBOTTOM: Egad!MATILDA: I think they’re just the right size.SNOOTBOTTOM: Egad!LOCKHART: What?SNOOTBOTTOM: They’re… they’re… WONDERFUL!MATILDA/LOCKHART: They are?SNOOTBOTTOM: My feet don’t hurt! My feet feel like my feet felt

when I was fifteen!MATILDA: Feet feel fifteen?LOCKHART: Like her feet felt. (MUSIC CUE 5: “They’re Wonderful.”)SNOOTBOTTOM: (Jumping up from the chair, dancing and cavorting.

Speaks.) Whoopee! I want to dance! I want to sing! I want to celebrate!(Sings.) They’re wonderful, wonderful! Simply magnificent!Wonderfully, splendidly made.Yes, they’re wonderfully, pleasantly simple yet elegant,Clearly the finest of grade.They’re wonderful, wonderful! Truly miraculous!Wonderfully, brilliantly grand!Yes, they’re wonderfully, lavishly rich and luxurious!No doubt they’re simply the best in the land.(In ecstasy, she moves about the room.) I’m floating!

LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing; amused.) She’s floating.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.) Yes, I’m floating!LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) She’s floating.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.)

Like a fluttering butterfly flitting about in the air.LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) She’s floating.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Swaying. Sings.) I’m sailing!LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) She’s sailing.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.) Yes, I’m sailing!LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) She’s sailing.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.)

Like a seagull adrift, I feel totally without a care!LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Aside.) What a pair.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.)

They’re wonderful, wonderful! Soothing and comf’table,Cozy and roomy yet snug.

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Yes, they’re wonderfully, pleasingly warm and relaxing.I feel like a satisfied bug in a rug!

LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) Oh, so snug.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Fluttering her arms. Sings.) I’m flying.LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) She’s flying.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.) Like a birdie.LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) Like a birdie.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.)

I’m feeling quite cuckoo, light-headed. It must be the heat.Cuckoo!

LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Fingers twirling in a circle at their temples to indicate she’s crazy.) Cuckoo!

SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.) I’m dancing!LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) She’s dancing.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.) As I’m floating!LOCKHART/MATILDA: (A hint of sarcasm. Sing.)

Again with the floating.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.)

Like a young ballerina, I’m nimble and quick on my feet!LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Aside to each other. Sing.) It must be the heat.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.)

They’re wonderful, wonderful! Simply magnificent!MATILDA: (Sings.) Wonderfully, splendidly made.LOCKHART: (Sings.)

Yes, they’re wonderfully, pleasantly simple yet elegant.SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.) Clearly the finest of grade!ALL THREE: (Sing.)

They’re wonderful, wonderful! Truly miraculous!Wonderfully, brilliantly grand!Yes, they’re wonderfully, lavishly rich and luxurious!

SNOOTBOTTOM: (Sings.) No doubt they’re simply the best…LOCKHART/MATILDA: (Sing.) No doubt they’re simply the best…ALL THREE: (Sing.) No doubt they’re simply the best

In the land! (Laughs and chatter. MUSIC OUT)MATILDA: You’ll take them?SNOOTBOTTOM: Take them? TAKE THEM? Of course I’ll take them!LOCKHART: I’ll be glad to wrap them up.SNOOTBOTTOM: Nonsense, man, I’ll wear them! Whoopee! How much

do I owe you?

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LOCKHART: (Timid.) Would 20 dracholas be too much?SNOOTBOTTOM: (Bellows.) TOO MUCH?MATILDA: (Cowering.) We could take less.SNOOTBOTTOM: LESS? What are you talking about?!LOCKHART: (Sad.) Whatever you think is fair.SNOOTBOTTOM: FAIR? I’ll show you FAIR! (Reaches into her purse and

pulls out a handful of coins which she gives to LOCKHART.) That’s fair!

LOCKHART: But, Mrs. Snootbottom, this is… 30 dracholas!SNOOTBOTTOM: And they’re worth every penny. I predict that you

will be shoemaker to the stars! Good-bye! Good-bye! (EXITS UP CENTER, dancing, hopping and delighting. LOCKHART and MATILDA watch her go. They cross DOWNSTAgE and stare at one another. Suddenly, they whoop with joy and embrace. MUSIC CUE 5a: “Sneerella’s Entrance Music.” At that moment, SNEERELLA ENTERS UP RIgHT. MUSIC OUT.)

SNEERELLA: Happiness? Do I hear happiness in here? KNOCK IT OFF!

LOCKHART: I suppose you want your money.SNEERELLA: I know you don’t have it. I’ve come to kick you out on

your proverbial seaters.MATILDA: Sorry.SNEERELLA: Don’t try to soft soap me, Matilda Cobblestone. Pack up

your junk and GET OUT OF HERE!LOCKHART: NO!SNEERELLA: (Sputtering.) What?! We’ll see about that. (Takes a

whistle out of her pocket and blows a strident blast.) The police will be here. Then let’s hear you say no! (POLICEMAN ENTERS UP LEFT. TOWNSPEOPLE, noting the confusion, follow and peer into the shop through the windows.) I want you to get these hayseeds out of here. I am collecting on my loan. This shack is mine now. (POLICEMAN starts to motion MATILDA and LOCKHART OUT. MATILDA stops him.)

MATILDA: We’re not going.SNEERELLA: Seize them! I want them out NOW!LOCKHART: If we pay you back the loan, can we stay?SNEERELLA: That will be the day.LOCKHART: Here! (Hands her the 20 dracholas.)SNEERELLA: (Sputtering.) Why, you little weasel, you, you…

pumpkin-snout… you little…

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MATILDA: Now, if you would be so kind as to… vamoose!SNEERELLA: You haven’t heard the end of this! I’m warning you!LOCKHART: OUT! (The POLICEMAN tips his hat to LOCKHART and

MATILDA, then escorts SNEERELLA OUT the door. The crowd outside cheers and follows the POLICEMAN and SNEERELLA OFF UP RIgHT. MATILDA and LOCKHART look at each other, laugh and smack, smack, smack.) I feel TERRIFIC!

MATILDA: We did it! Now we have enough to buy some more leather.LOCKHART: We have enough for THREE pieces of leather and… a

small turkeybird.MATILDA: THREE pairs of shoes… oh, Lock, I have an idea…LOCKHART: I think I have the same idea!BOTH: The Widow Perkins!MATILDA: We’ll make two pair to sell…LOCKHART: And another pair to give away.MATILDA: The Widow has been so ill, and she needs new shoes

badly.BOTH: WHOOPEE! (Smack, smack, smack.)LOCKHART: Have to go to the tanners and get the leather.MATILDA: It’s a long way. Can you make three pair of shoes by

tomorrow?LOCKHART: It doesn’t matter if they’re all done by tomorrow. Let’s go

to the market and get a nice plump turkeybird. Then I’ll make the Widow’s shoes first.

MATILDA: And, we’re off! (Arm in arm, the two EXIT UP CENTER, humming the ELVES’ tune. THE LIgHTS DIM OUT.)

End of Scene One

Scene TwoLIGHTS UP DIM: It is late evening. LOCKHART is at his work table. He has just finished making a pair of shoes for the WIDOW. MATILDA sits in the DOWN LEFT chair, working on her mending. LOCKHART sighs, sets down the shoes.LOCKHART: I’ve finished the shoes for the Widow Perkins. (Picks up

shoes, shows them to MATILDA.)MATILDA: (Puts down sewing and crosses to table STAgE LEFT.)

Beautiful! You’ve done it again! The Widow will have a new hop in her step when she wears these.

LOCKHART: (Yawning.) I’m worn out. I’ll finish the other shoes tomorrow.

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MATILDA: I’ll set the rooster! (They EXIT DOWN LEFT, humming the ELVES’ tune. LIgHTS CHANgE to reflect passage of time. Quiet for a moment and then we hear the sound of the ELVES as they ENTER from various points. They greet each other, then cross UPSTAgE of table.)

MORTZ: Lookee, lookee… somebody been workin’.HAZEL: Nice job! He done do a nice job, Mr. Mortz.ALL: Ummhmm!GRACIE: A very nicely, nicely job.STUDEBAKER: The bestest job I ever saw.SCHWARTZ: For a SHOEMAKER…MORTZ: Attention! Ready!SCHWARTZ: Looks like two more pair a shoes to make. Let’s get

crackin’!ALL: All ready!SCHWARTZ: Ooops, what kind of shoes?MORTZ: Boots!HAZEL: Ballet slippers!GRACIE: Walking shoes!STUDEBAKER: Running shoes! Running shoes!ALL: Running shoes?HAZEL: Thought we settled that.STUDEBAKER: I just thought it would be nice.MORTZ: Elf Choosing Time. (ELVES move into semi-circle DOWN STAgE

of table. Scissors, rock, paper, counting out game. The first time all have rock, the second time all have paper, the third time all have paper except gRACIE and HAZEL, who have scissors.) Ballet slippers and walking shoes it is! (MUSIC CUE 5b: “March, March, March!—Reprise.” ELVES giggle and move to the table where they begin to work on the shoes.)

ELVES: (Sing.) Work, work, work, we does work all together,As we cut, cut, cut aways.Then we snip, snip, snip as we hook, loop and tether.While we stretch, stretch the leather till it stays!Stitch, stitch, stitch, as we sews till the mornin’,And we tap, tap, tap them heels.Then we clean and we shine,The elfen ways!Work, work, work, we does work all together,As we cut, cut, cut aways.Then we snip, snip, snip as we hook, loop and tether.

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while we stretch, stretch the leather till it stays.Stitch, stitch, stitch, as we sews till the mornin’,And we tap, tap, tap those heels.Then we clean and we shine,Yes, we clean and we shine!Then we dance and we dine the elfen ways! (MUSIC OUT. Finally, they are finished and mask the table as before so that the switch can be made to the finished shoes. MORTZ is UPSTAgE of table. He holds the shoes up.) Tah dah!

ALL: Ooooooo!STUDEBAKER: They be nice, but I still thinks that running…HAZEL: When YOU win the game, you can make your ol’ running

shoes.GRACIE: (Laughing.) Running shoes! (SOUND EFFECT: ROOSTER CROWS.)SCHWARTZ: Oh, oh! Better get a move on, fellers. (The giggling ELVES

EXIT. LOCKHART ENTERS DOWN LEFT. He isn’t quite awake. He mumbles to himself.)

LOCKHART: Have to get the shoes made. Have to make the shoes… the shoes… (Crosses to the table.) Aaaaawk! Eeeeek! Oh, no! Matilda! Matilda! (MATILDA ENTERS DOWN LEFT.)

MATILDA: What is it?!LOCKHART: The shoes! The… (LOCKHART falls on the floor in a comic

faint, feet up in the air. MATILDA races to his side.)MATILDA: (Slaps his face.) Lockhart! What is it?LOCKHART: (Coming to.) Ooooo! The shoes! It’s magic!MATILDA: You must have stayed up all night to make these. But, you

couldn’t have because I was sleeping right beside you and… (They stare at one another.)

BOTH: It’s magic!LOCKHART: Who would do such a thing?MATILDA: (Wide-eyed.) Maybe you DIDN’T make those shoes that

Mrs. Snootbottom bought.LOCKHART: I don’t think I did.MATILDA: Then, who did?LOCKHART: We’ve got to figure this out… (SOUNDS of a CROWD.

We see the TOWNSPEOPLE forming outside the windows. MAYOR CLANKBATTLE ENTERS UP LEFT and through UP CENTER door. LOCKHART and MATILDA get to their feet.) Mayor Clankbattle!

MAYOR: Cobblestone! Mrs. Cobblestone! Mrs. Snootbottom told me about the wonderful shoes you made for her. I am here to purchase a pair of shoes for myself.

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MATILDA: Huh?MAYOR: The shoes! The shoes, woman! I want some shoes. (Points

to the walking shoes on the table.)LOCKHART: But… (MAYOR moves to the table. LOCKHART scurries in

front of him and picks up the shoes.) You don’t know about these shoes. There’s something you…

MAYOR: Nonsense, man! Put them on me. My corns are killing me! (Moves to the DOWN LEFT chair and takes off his old shoes. As he does so, the CROWD has begun to move into the room from UP CENTER. They remain UPSTAgE of the action and react to the scene.)

MATILDA: (Moves to table, picks up ballet slippers.) But, your Mayor-ness, these shoes…

MAYOR: Not THOSE shoes, woman. The others. The OTHERS! I don’t want to take up ballet dancing.

LOCKHART: We really should tell you that…MAYOR: Get on with it!LOCKHART: Is that an order?MAYOR: Of course, it’s an order. My corns! My corns! Stupid name

for them. Why couldn’t they call them cauliflowers or alligators… no, they call them corns. Silly name. Come on… COME ON! I’m in agony. (LOCKHART crosses with shoes STAgE LEFT to the MAYOR. He kneels and places them on his feet. Immediately, there is a look of astonishment and joy on the MAYOR’S face. He jumps up from the chair. MATILDA and LOCKHART clutch each other in fear. The CROWD is amazed.)

MAYOR: She was right! Snootbottom was right! My feet feel great! In fact, I feel wonderful! Younger, livelier, handsomer and wittier! Here! Here! (Hands LOCKHART a handful of coins.)

LOCKHART: Mayor, this is too much!MAYOR: Balderdash! I’ve got the money. You’ve got the talent. I feel

GREAT! (The ballerina, LORETTA LE POINTE ENTERS UP CENTER, on tippy-toe. She tippy-toes DOWNSTAgE to LOCKHART.)

LORETTA: I need some ballet slippers. My public awaits me! (Points to the slippers.) Those! I want those!

MATILDA: Miss Le Pointe, there is something you should know about those…

LORETTA: Not to worry! Place them on my dainty feet! (Dances to the DOWN LEFT chair, sits daintily and removes her shoes.)

MATILDA: (Shaking her head.) Don’t blame me if…LORETTA: (Clapping her dainty hands.) Now, now! Attention! Place

them on my dainty little feet.

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MATILDA: (Crossing to LORETTA with shoes. To LOCKHART.) I tried to warn her. (Slips the shoes on LORETTA’S feet. Immediately, LORETTA springs from the chair and executes some pretty astounding moves around the room. The CROWD cheers. MUSIC CUE 5c: “They’re Wonderful—Reprise.”)

LORETTA: (Sings.)They’re wonderful, wonderful! Simply magnificent!Wonderfully, splendidly made.Yes, they’re wonderfully, pleasantly simple yet elegant,Clearly the finest of grade.They’re wonderful, wonderful! Truly miraculous!Wonderfully, brilliantly grand!Yes, they’re wonderfully, lavishly rich and luxurious!No doubt they’re simply the best in the land.

LOCKHART: (To MATILDA. Speaks.) Here we go again!LORETTA: (Sings.) I’m floating!MAYOR: (Sings.) She’s floating.LORETTA: (Sings.) Yes, I’m floating!CHORUS: (Sings.) She’s floating.LORETTA: (Sings.)

Like a fluttering butterfly flitting about in the air.CHORUS: (Sings.) She’s floating.LORETTA: (Swaying. Sings.) I’m sailing!MAYOR: (Sings.) She’s sailing.LORETTA: (Sings.) Yes, I’m sailing!CHORUS: (Sings.) She’s sailing.LORETTA: (Sings.)

Like a seagull adrift, I feel totally without a care!CHORUS: (Sings.) So debonair!LORETTA/CHORUS: (Sing.)

They’re wonderful, wonderful! Truly miraculous!Wonderfully, brilliantly grand!Yes, they’re wonderfully, lavishly rich and luxurious!No doubt they’re simply the best…

LORETTA: (Sings.) No doubt they’re simply the best…LORETTA/CHORUS: (Sing.) No doubt they’re simply the best,

In the land! (Laughs and chatter. MUSIC OUT. Here, have some money! (gives MATILDA a handful of coins.)

MATILDA: This is too much!

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LORETTA: Nonsense! Where my art is concerned, there is no limit! (Nods to the MAYOR.) Let us go! I shall dance for you at the Mayor’s mansion! I shall dance my dainty head off! I shall dance and dance and astound the world! (Dances to the door, stops and turns.) I wish to order fifty pair! Pronto! Expressly for dainty moi! (Dances OUT the door, followed by the MAYOR and then the TOWNSPEOPLE. The last one to leave the shop is WIDOW PERKINS, a very poor woman dressed in rags. MATILDA calls to her.)

MATILDA: Widow Perkins?WIDOW: Yes, Matilda?MATILDA: We have a little gift for you.WIDOW: For me? But, why?LOCKHART: (Crosses to the table and picks up the shoes he has made

for her.) It’s because of all the nice things you do for people. (To MATILDA, under his breath.) At least we know there’s nothing wrong with these.

MATILDA: (Taking shoes.) We want you to have this pair of shoes. It’s not much but…

WIDOW: I can’t accept these.LOCKHART: Why not?WIDOW: I don’t have the money to pay for them. (MATILDA escorts

WIDOW to DOWN LEFT chair, seats her, takes off her old shoes and places the new ones on her feet.)

MATILDA: We don’t want money. You’ve done so many nice things for us. Remember when you took care of me when I was so sick?

LOCKHART: And the time you fixed my only Sunday shirt when the Roundtrees’ pet pig thought it was a corncob and ate it?

WIDOW: That was nothing…LOCKHART: Then, consider this nothing, too. We want you to have

them.MATILDA: We really do!WIDOW: Oh, they feel so good! It’s like magic! I don’t know how to

thank you.LOCKHART: You can thank us by coming to dinner tonight. We want to

share our good luck. We’re having another turkeybird.MATILDA: And bring your whole family!WIDOW: Thank you, friends. Thank you, so much! (They escort her

to the door. They wave and call good-bye. WIDOW EXITS UP RIgHT. MATILDA and LOCKHART cross DOWN CENTER.)

LOCKHART: What a strange day!

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MATILDA: You said it, my little caboose. You said it! (The LIgHTS DIM OUT.)

End of Scene Two

Scene ThreeLIGHTS UP DIM: It is night. LOCKHART and MATILDA stand at the door and wave good night, ad-libbing to the WIDOW and her children (who are unseen). MATILDA then crosses to DOWN LEFT chair and sits. LOCKHART crosses to table and sets out leather. They are quiet for a moment.LOCKHART: I’ve been trying and trying to figure it out.MATILDA: I’ve thought of it left and right and upside down.LOCKHART: I think I’ve found the answer.BOTH: Somebody is making those shoes.LOCKHART: I have a plan.MATILDA: (Crosses to LOCKHART. LOCKHART comes from behind table

to CENTER.) Goody, I love plans.LOCKHART: Tonight we’ll hide and see who it is.MATILDA: Lockhart, my little periwinkle, you are a genius!LOCKHART: It’s late. Let’s pretend to go to bed, but we’ll stay awake

and SPY!MATILDA: Oooo, it sounds exciting! (LOCKHART and MATILDA

exaggerate their fatigue.)LOCKHART: Time to hit the hay…MATILDA: Get some z’s…LOCKHART: See the sandman…MATILDA: Go to SLEEP!LOCKHART: Boy, we are SO TIRED! SO VERY TIRED! WE ARE GOING

TO SLEEP NOW! (MATILDA and LOCKHART stretch and yawn loudly. Wink at each other and then EXIT DOWN LEFT. LIgHTS CHANgE to suggest passage of time. A few beats. ELVES ENTER from various points. MATILDA and LOCKHART peek in DOWN LEFT. ELVES dance about the room and then move to the table.)

HAZEL: Aha! New work to do!GRACIE: Shoesies to make!MORTZ: What kind?SCHWARTZ: We all had a chance ’cept for you and Studebaker.MORTZ: I say we make BOOTS!STUDEBAKER: And I say…

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ALL: RUNNING SHOES! (ELVES all laugh and make fun of STUDEBAKER. MATILDA and LOCKHART look at each other in surprise and mouth “running shoes?”)

GRACIE: Studebaker, you gots to make them by yourself. Nobody ever made running shoes before.

STUDEBAKER: It’s just this here idea I have in me head.MORTZ: Everyone, to work! (MUSIC CUE 5d: “March, March, March!”

ELVES begin the night’s work. STUDEBAKER does his own thing, making running shoes. MATILDA and LOCKHART are astounded. They watch with wide eyes and can’t quite believe what they are seeing.)

ALL ELVES: (Sing.)Work, work, work, we does work all together,As we cut, cut, cut aways.Then we snip, snip, snip as we hook, loop and tether.While we stretch, stretch the leather till it stays.Stitch, stitch, stitch, as we sews till the mornin’,And we tap, tap, tap them heels.Then we clean and we shine,Yes, we clean and we shine!Then we dance and we dine the elfen ways! (They’ve finished with the shoes [boots] and mask the table as before to conceal the finished product. MUSIC OUT. MORTZ holds up the boots.)

ALL: Oooooo! (SOUND EFFECT: ROOSTER CROWS.)SCHWARTZ: Oops! Rooster time!STUDEBAKER: (Points to the running shoes on the table.) But, did ya

see me running shoes? Did ya, huh? Huh? Huh?ELVES: (Unimpressed.) WE SAW!!!MATILDA: (Aside to LOCKHART.) Those are the weirdest pair of shoes

I’ve ever seen in my life!LOCKHART: Nobody would buy those… would they? (MATILDA

shrugs.)MORTZ: Nobody would put THOSE on!STUDEBAKER: (Examining his running shoes, very thoughtful and

pleased with the results.) I thinks I will name them after me ol’ Aunt Rhea and me ol’ Uncle Bock. I will call them… Rhea-Bocks! (The ELVES groan.) Well… maybe I’ll just name them after me ol’ Grandpa Nicky, an’ then we can call them…

MORTZ: Enough. Let’s get a goin’! NOW! (The ELVES EXIT, various, giggling and humming their little tune. MATILDA and LOCKHART watch them go. They move to CENTER after the ELVES have cleared. Supreme amazement.)

LOCKHART: Did I see what I think I saw?

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MATILDA: I think you saw what you thought you saw. What did you “saw”?

LOCKHART: Little elves in their underwear.MATILDA: That’s what I saw.LOCKHART: Why have they been doing all this work for us?MATILDA: Why?LOCKHART: I don’t know. I just don’t know!MATILDA: We have to do something to repay them.LOCKHART: (Examining the running shoes, shaking his head.) I guess

everyone is entitled to one mistake. They’ll never sell.MATILDA: Lockhart, I have an idea!LOCKHART: An idea?MATILDA: About how to repay them. They must be very cold, running

around in their underwear.LOCKHART: Not to mention, embarrassed!MATILDA: So—I’ll make them some clothes!LOCKHART: Matilda, my little tulip-nose, that’s a wonderful idea. You

make the clothes, and I’ll make them some shoes!MATILDA: What fun! Let’s get started! (They “Whoopee!” and smack,

smack, smack. The LIgHTS DIM.)End of Scene Three

Scene FourThe next evening. MATILDA and LOCKHART sit in STAGE LEFT chairs, exhausted. The running shoes are displayed on a special pedestal.LOCKHART: I’ve never been so busy in my life.MATILDA: It seems like everyone wants shoes!LOCKHART: I don’t know how I’ll keep up with all the work.MATILDA: I’ve been thinking about that very thing. I have an idea.LOCKHART: Your ideas are always good, my little chipmunk cheeks!MATILDA: We’ll hire some help, show them how to make shoes and

all work together.LOCKHART: (Jumps up from chair, crosses to MATILDA, pulls her to her

feet.) Of course! Why didn’t I think of that?! This town NEEDS a factory! (Smack, smack, smack.)

MATILDA: Have you got the shoes done?LOCKHART: (Crossing to storeroom DOWN RIgHT, EXITS, still talking.)

They’re right out here. Didn’t want anyone to see them. (Returns with five pairs of ELF shoes.) How about the clothes? Did you finish them?

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MATILDA: (Reaches into her sewing bag by DOWN LEFT chair and pulls out five elf tunics.) I worked on them every spare minute. (Both move to the table and spread out the tunics and shoes. We hear the sounds of chattering and giggles OFF RIgHT.)

LOCKHART: Quick! They’re coming! (MATILDA and LOCKHART scurry DOWN LEFT and hide to watch. ELVES giggling and laughing, scurry in from various directions.)

MORTZ: Work to do! Work to do! (ELVES move UPSTAgE of table and stop with a start.)

STUDEBAKER: Yowzah!HAZEL: What be this?GRACIE: Holy moley!SCHWARTZ: There be no leather to make the shoes!MORTZ: There be clothes!GRACIE: And shoes!HAZEL: And there be a note. It says, “Thank you, Elves. These are

for you!”STUDEBAKER: For us? (Cheers and general pandemonium as the

ELVES dance around the room, putting on their new garments. MATILDA and LOCKHART watch with delight. After they’ve donned the clothes, they skip OUT UP CENTER.)

MATILDA: They liked them!LOCKHART: Ah, of course they did, my little chickadee!MATILDA: Do you think they’ll be back?LOCKHART: (Thoughtful.) No, I think their work here is done.MATILDA: I’ll never forget them.LOCKHART: Nor will I. Come, my little parakeet. (He and MATILDA

EXIT DOWN LEFT. MUSIC CUE 5e: “The Old Lady—Reprise.” [NOTE: See MUSIC SCORE for background “oohs” and “ahhs.”] The OLD LADY ENTERS UP LEFT. She checks to make sure no one is in the shop. Her cloak drops away, and we see that she is a beautiful fairy princess. She spreads her arms and moves around the room as she sprinkles her magic on the house and all who dwell within. DIRECT SEgUE TO MUSIC CUE 6: “Bless This House.”)

OLD LADY/PRINCESS: (Recites.) Kindness is repaid in kind.Forever will you growIn wealth and hope and charityAnd safety from all foe. (Crosses to running shoes.)And as for these, a special charm,That’s known only to me.But, its results shall gallop soon

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For all the world to see.Matilda and Lockhart Cobblestone,For the kindness you have shown, I now…(Sings.) Bless this house with laughter and joy,Grant her peace and grace from above,Give her the charm of a young child’s toy,Wrap her so gently in linens of love.Lullaby, fable, an old nursery rhyme,Truly this tale’s just begun.Wonderfully charming, she’ll stand throughout time.A magic place to everyone!Bless this house with warmth and good will.May her hearth give comfort to all.Tend to her fire, she’ll soften the chill.And bless you with mem’ries when evening does fall.Good night and sweet dreaming to one and to all! (MUSIC OUT; DIRECT SEgUE to MUSIC CUE 6a: “Sneerella’s Entrance Music.” [Whisk! The PRINCESS sweeps OUT the door with her cloak. Silence for a few beats.] We hear CROWD SOUNDS from UP RIgHT. Soon, the TOWNSPEOPLE, led by SNEERELLA, ENTER and cross to UP CENTER door. SNEERELLA pounds on the door. No answer. CROWD murmurs. SNEERELLA pounds harder. MUSIC OUT.)

SNEERELLA: Open up! Open up! Get up, you sniveling warthogs! (LOCKHART and MATILDA ENTER DOWN LEFT. They huddle for a moment, confused about what is going on.)

MATILDA: What is it?LOCKHART: I don’t know! Looks like half the town is out there.MATILDA: Guess who else!BOTH: SNEERELLA TWERM!SNEERELLA: Let me in, you boobies! (LOCKHART scurries to the

door and opens it. SNEERELLA sweeps into the room and moves DOWN CENTER. The CROWD moves in behind her and range across UPSTAgE area.)

LOCKHART: (Follows SNEERELLA DOWNSTAgE.) Miss Blerm… uh, Squirm… TWERM!

SNEERELLA: I want a pair now! NOW! Do you hear?MATILDA: (Crosses into CENTER from STAgE LEFT.) I’m sorry, Miss

Glerm… TWERM… we don’t have any shoes.SNEERELLA: What in Billy blue blazes are you talking about?LOCKHART: We’ll have some more ready tomorrow, but until then…

(MATILDA and LOCKHART look at each other at the same time with the same idea.)

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BOTH: THE RUNNING SHOES!SNEERELLA: What are you talking about, dunderheads? Who in their

right mind would buy a pair of RUNNING SHOES! Stupidest thing I’ve ever heard of!

MATILDA: (Sweet.) Wouldn’t you like to try them on? (The OLD LADY moves quietly into the room and slightly toward SNEERELLA.)

SNEERELLA: I DO NOT! I want regular shoes. Everybody’s been talking about them, and I WANT SOME, TOO! In fact… (Suddenly very evil, very malevolent.) I discovered a little snafu in the loan contract. I think I can find a way to kick you out of here if you don’t give me… GIVE mind you… I’m NOT buying… the shoes that I want! (The OLD LADY, unnoticed by the crowd makes some magical motions toward SNEERELLA. Suddenly, the spell takes effect. MUSIC CUE 6b: “The Spell.” [NOTE: See MUSIC SCORE for background “oohs” and “ahhs.”] SNEERELLA goes through some mighty weird contortions with bleeps and glooks and wangles. She turns, as if in a daze, and sloooowly crosses up to the window and the running shoes.) And THESE ARE THE ONES I WANT! I want them! I WANT THEM NOW! (The OLD LADY moves back into the CROWD. MUSIC OUT.)

MATILDA: Certainly, Miss Twerm! (Ushers SNEERELLA to DOWN LEFT chair and seats her. In the meantime, LOCKHART has gotten the running shoes from the window and crosses to TWERM.)

LOCKHART: Here you are, Sneerella. Just for you!SNEERELLA: (Babbling.) Running shoes… Rhea-bocks… Nickys…

quarter mile… run for the arts… run… (LOCKHART kneels, takes off SNEERELLA’S shoes and replaces them with the running shoes. We see a transformation. SNEERELLA’S feet do not hurt.) Ahhhh. My corns don’t hurt. My bunions don’t hurt. My arches don’t hurt. My toenails don’t hurt. My… my… oh… (Another transformation. Suddenly SNEERELLA is on her feet. She can’t stop moving. She begins running from RIgHT to LEFT. The CROWD is animated.) I want to RUN! I HAVE to run! I MUST RUN! HELP! HELP! (Runs OUT the door UP CENTER and OFF UP LEFT. The CROWD is amazed. In a split second, she ENTERS DOWN LEFT and runs OFF DOWN RIgHT, then past the windows UPSTAgE. A man, ZOOM CORRIgAN, wearing a running suit but not running shoes, ENTERS UP CENTER. During the following scene, we see SNEERELLA, every now and then, race past the UPSTAgE windows. ZOOM stops at CENTER STAgE.)

ZOOM: Who is the shoemaker? (Murmurs from the CROWD.) I said, who is the shoemaker?

LOCKHART: (Coming forward, hesitantly.) I am. I’m sorry. I didn’t know what was going to happen…

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MATILDA: He isn’t responsible. SHE wanted the shoes.ZOOM: Can you make any more?LOCKHART: Well, I think so. I studied the design. Pretty weird

looking.ZOOM: I want one hundred pair! Can you do it?LOCKHART: One hundred pair? But…MATILDA: It wasn’t our fault, really.ZOOM: One hundred pair… and another one hundred by the first of

the year. Can you do it?LOCKHART: I think I can… that is, if my plan works out for a… (Again

we must mention that SNEERELLA is racing past the windows every few minutes at high speed.)

ZOOM: I need them! I’m Zoom Corrigan, captain of the Clankbottom Olympic Running Team. With your shoes, we will win every event. We’ll be famous. (Encourages LOCKHART.) Just do it!

MAYOR: I will endorse them!MATILDA/LOCKHART: Mayor Clankbottom!MAYOR: And with my endorsement…ZOOM: Running shoes will become the passion!MAYOR: The rage!ZOOM: The ultimate fashion!MAYOR: And you’ll be rich!LOCKHART: No, no, Mayor. The TOWN WILL BE RICH. That’s what

I was trying to tell you. We want to start a shoe factory. Then the entire town will have jobs! (The CROWD cheers. MAYOR shakes LOCKHART and MATILDA’S hands.)

ZOOM: We will WIN, WIN, WIN! (Starts running toward UP CENTER EXIT. MAYOR stops him.)

MAYOR: Where are you going, man?ZOOM: (Points outside.) I’ve got to catch that weird woman out there.

She’s the fastest thing I’ve ever seen. I need her for the team! (Zooms OUT UP CENTER and tries to catch up with SNEERELLA. She’s always about three seconds ahead of him. The OLD LADY moves DOWNSTAgE and snaps her fingers. The ACTION FREEZES. Even SNEERELLA and ZOOM are caught in mid-stride.)

OLD LADY: May this village grow and prosper. May you all work in harmony to make shoes that will bring lightness to every foot! (Claps her hands three times.) Come, Elves! Come! (The giggling ELVES, wearing the clothing and shoes that the COBBLESTONES have made for them, ENTER from various points to gather around

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the OLD LADY.) We have work to do, Elves! Wherever there is love and kindness we shall go, to help the best we can. (She and ELVES start to EXIT UP CENTER. ELVES scamper OFF UP LEFT. OLD LADY pauses in the door a moment, surveys the scene, then snaps fingers. The room comes to life once more. OLD LADY slips OUT UP CENTER and OFF LEFT. The CROWD cheers.)

MAYOR: Here’s to the Cobblestones and our new factory!CROWD: To shoes! (MUSIC CUE 6c: “Elves and the Shoemaker—

Epilogue.” Sing.)ENSEMBLE GIRLS: (Sing.) Ooo. Ooo.

Secretly they come when all are fast asleep.Quietly they enter without a peep.

ENSEMBLE BOYS: (Sing.) Toiling they work long into the night.Magically they disappear by morning light.


ENSEMBLE GIRLS: (Sing.) Ooo. Ooo. Ooo. (MUSIC OUT. CURTAIN.)

END OF PLAYMUSIC CUE 6d: “Curtain Call—March, March, March!”MUSIC CUE 6e: “Bless This House—Optional Choral Finale.”ENSEMBLE: (Sings.)

Bless this house with warmth and good will. May her hearth give comfort to all. Tend to her fire, she’ll soften the chill. And bless you with mem’ries when evening does fall. Good night and sweet dreaming to one and to all! (MUSIC OUT.)

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PRODUCTION NOTES

PROPERTIESONSTAGE, Scene One: Large work table with tools (scissors, hammers,

thread, etc.), five stools, two chairs, two display shelves, large fireplace, cooking pot, cup and spoon, two chairs, door flanked by windows, sign in a window that reads, “Lockhart Cobblestone, Shoemaker.”

BROUGHT ON, Scene One:Ladle (MATILDA)High-heeled party shoes, comfy-looking walking shoes, piece of

leather (LOCKHART)Gold coins (SNOOTBOTTOM)

ONSTAGE, Scene Two: Same as Scene One with two pieces of leather, pair of women’s comfortable walking shoes, pair of ballet slippers, pair of man’s walking shoes

BROUGHT ON, Scene Two:Sewing and sewing basket (MATILDA)Gold coins (MAYOR, LORETTA)

ONSTAGE, Scene Three: Same as Scene One with two pieces of leather, pair of boots, pair of high-tech running shoes

ONSTAGE, Scene Four: Same as Scene One with running shoes on special pedestal, sewing basket with five tunics for the elves, hats also if possible

BROUGHT ON, Scene Four:Five pairs of soft slippers for the elves (LOCKHART)

COSTUMINGSince we are setting this in any long ago time, in a mythical town, costumes can be as wild and fanciful as the director desires. To give a flavor of the time, the ladies might wear long skirts and peasant blouses, and the men might wear tights or non-descript slacks, and tunics or bloused shirts. The townspeople have a rustic look about them, and the shoemaker and his wife are neat but shabby.SNEERELLA: Sneerella is the kind of person whose best color is black.

This matches her rotten heart. A long black skirt, perhaps a black cape and a huge evil-looking black hat.

MRS. SNOOTBOTTOM: A high society lady, resembling a big bosomed thrush. Bright, long dress, heavily decorated coat or cape, and a positively outrageous hat.

MAYOR CLANKBATTLE: Brightly colored costume with a cape and badges.

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OLD LADY/PRINCESS: The OLD LADY wears a hood cape of some kind. A Velcro closing would provide an easy way of hiding her pretty PRINCESS costume underneath and would open easily and quickly.

LORETTA LE POINTE: Full ballerina gear—a tutu, the works!ZOOM CORRIGAN: A running suit decorated with “old time”

accessories—perhaps braid or medals.ELVES: Long underwear or leotards in first scenes. Add bright tunics,

hats and soft slippers.

SET PIECESDOOR AND WINDOW UNITS: These don’t have to be practical. Window

frames, made of cardboard, can be suspended from the flies. The UP CENTER door might be a simple frame. It does not have to open and close. UPSTAGE walls are not necessary.

FIREPLACE: Large appliance cartons are light and easy to move, and can be readily painted. The glow from the fire can be simulated by using a small light bulb covered with red cellophane concealed under the logs.

SHOEMAKER’S TABLE: Any table will do, as long as it is fairly large and masked on the DOWNSTAGE side. The completed shoes are concealed on the UPSTAGE side of the table. The “used” leather is also placed here when the “switch” is made. The leather itself can be textured fabric—felt, corduroy, brushed nylon, etc.

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The Elves and the Shoem

aker—The M

usical - Set D

esign

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