Friendships

By Alyssa ThomsonAnd Social Media

Part of the habit

• When talking about friendships and social media, it is important to take into consideration the importance of these websites. Without understanding why there is such a dependence, we cannot fully understand the impact.

• Skyler Sierra, an 18-year-old from Colorado stated, “If you’re not on MySpace, you don’t exist.” While MySpace may not be as prominent now, the mindset towards social media websites still remains.

Defining friendship• Friendship is no longer strictly

defined in organic ways, or normal ritualistic activities.

• Now, it is normal to recognize, formulate, and strengthen relationships through the Internet.

• Friendships, like many things, are constructed and defined culturally, and these social networks have become a growing cultural force.

• People feel that they are rewarded for being dependent on these sites, and often recognize the success or failure of relationships through sites like Facebook and MySpace.

• It’s easy to dismiss online interactions as less impactful than those we have in a face to face setting, but it is important not to separate these two concepts very much, because the users do not.

• A key concept to understanding friendships and social media is that social networking sites are not seen as virtual worlds, but simply another way to connect with their peers.

• While in the past, teenagers would find social gathering places like the mall, they have most recently felt ostracized from these places and instead retreat to an online space. It is often treated as a “hangout” and conversations and interactions move seemlessly from interactions in person to interactions online, as long as the same people are involved.

Using Social Media as a Negotiator for Social Standings.

• Facebook and MySpace users turn to these websites for a sense of social status and power. One of the researchers, Milner, suggested that this obsession with status comes from these young people “having so little political and economic power.”

• Teenagers often use this virtual space to create and reinforce their social standing among their peers.

• While before these websites, popularity was simply based on perception, now people have actual physical representations of their popularity. It becomes a numbers contest: whoever has the most friends wins. The number of “likes” your status, picture, or relationship update gets therefore becomes a representation of your importance and relevance among your peers.

• Although it’s extremely rare, there has been a lot of concern about children being targeted by adults, most specifically sexual predators.

• This distrust stays with us as we grow, and most people, especially in the U.S. are very wary of participating in conversations with people they do not know, and instead use them to build and maintain friendships with people they already know.

• While this makes people feel more safe, it also eliminates the possibility of people opening themselves up to completely different individuals and lifestyles, one of the most positive possibilities of online communication.

• This concept is known as homophily, a term that describes the likelihood of people to connect with others that share their interest and values.

• People who do use the internet to talk to strangers are often shamed or embarassed, which is unfortunate for those who would like the comfort of talking to strangers on topics that they might not necessarily be comfortable talking to those they are close with.

• While there are no social consequences for “de-friending” or ignoring friend requests from people that they do not know, it is considered rude to do this to someone that you do know, even just an acquaintance.

• Removing someone from a social media website is symbolic for removing them from your life, and so it is often considered a very personal action that is often used to purposefully upset others.

Social Hierarchies• Not only is status important

on an individual level, but also among the friends accumulated in the process.

• MySpace had a “Top 8” feature, in which users could rank the people that were most important in their life and separate them from the rest of their friends.

• This caused a lot of drama, because people would judge how important they were to someone else based on how they ranked, or if they made the ranking at all. An uneven ranking between two individuals could cause jealousies and question loyalties.

Online Drama• The “Top 8” feature is

an example of how much drama can also start in an online setting.

• While drama has always been a large part of personal relationships, many say that rumors, gossip, and drama travel a lot faster and with more magnitude when it is through the Internet.

Cyberbullies

• As a result of conflicting social statuses, social hierachies, and online drama, some people also use these sites to harass or bully others.

• Unfortunately, the actual act of “cyberbullying” is difficult to define and therefore difficult to protect people from or find punishment for bullies.

• In many of the cases, victims are also the aggressors, and anonymity makes it difficult to track.

• Just as social media websites can generate and enhance relationships, it can also cause damage for those who choose to use it in a hurtful way.

Information taken from:Ito, Mizuko, Sonja Baumer, Matteo Bittani, Danah Boyd, and Rachel Cody. Hanging Out, Messing Around, and Geeking Out: Kids Living and Learning with New Media. N.p.: n.p., n.d. 79-116. Web.