FROM WARTS TO WINGS: HELPING “TOUGH” STUDENTS

LIVE HEALTHIER AND HAPPIER LIVES

John Sommers-Flanagan, Ph.D.

Department of Counselor Education

University of Montana

John.sf@mso.umt.edu

Johnsommersflanagan.com

TODAY’S PLAN

• Thanks to Iestyn Bright and Chris Schimmel of WVSCA for this opportunity

• Big GOAL: Articulate 10 key principles and strategies of human change that you can immediately use with students and parents

TODAY’S PLAN II

• Organized like a book

• All powerpoint slides are at johnsommersflanagan.com

• Instructions: I talk about 10 key principles and strategies

• You listen, laugh at all the right times, learn, and leave feeling inspired and filled with insights

MY POLITICAL PLATFORM

The road to economic vitality, the road to environmental sustainability, the road to excellence in health care and social support programs, and the road to good government always has and always will run through education.

WHO ELSE HAS/HAD THIS PLATFORM?

• Nobody in 2015 . . .

• But, John Adams, in the 1770s:

“Laws for the liberal education of youth, especially for the lower classes of people, are so extremely wise and useful that to a humane and generous mind, no expense for this purpose would be thought extravagant” (McCullough, 2001, p. 103)

INTRODUCTION

• Keynote rating: R or PG-13?

• Tough Students are not Tough Students

• Opening Story or Visualization

CHAPTER ONETHE CATATONIC WOMAN

THE 1ST BIG PRINCIPLE

We should WORK HARD to not judge students, parents, and teachers based on their appearance and behavior because there’s always more to it than we think

CHAPTER TWOMEETING JESUS AT THE PORTLAND VA

THE 2ND BIG PRINCIPLE

If you want genuine cooperation

Be less threatening

CHAPTER THREETY AND THE BIG TRAUMA BOY

The Amazing

Mary Cover Jones

COUNTERCONDITIONING MOJO• Challenging students (TOUGH KIDS), parents,

and teachers are aversively conditioned to school counselors!

• How do we get reluctant students, parents, and teachers comfortable “in the room” with us?

THE 3RD BIG PRINCIPLE

Use counterconditioning mojo to get people comfortable with you and

working on change

What will you use?

CHAPTER FOUR: POWERS OF MIND

THE 1ST CHANGE STRATEGY

Use the power of your mind

to creatively and relentlessly focus on

YOUR GOALS

CHAPTER FIVETHE SATANIC GOLDEN RULE

THE 2ND CHANGE STRATEGY

Create your own positive respect bubble . . . and watch out for the

REVENGE IMPULSE

CHAPTER SIXA CAT ON MY HEAD

THE THREE-STEP EMOTIONAL CHANGE TRICK

1. Feel the feeling (accept and respect it)

2. Think a new thought or do something different

3. Share the good mood

4. Teach someone else the three steps

THE 3RD CHANGE STRATEGYEmotional states and

emotional reactions are complex

Students need simple strategies for managing their emotional lives.

CHAPTER SEVENCREATE NEW STORIES

THE 4TH CHANGE STRATEGY

We can collaborate WITH

STUDENTS to build

stories of health and resilience

CHAPTER EIGHTANDREA’S STRONG ARM

THE 5TH CHANGE STRATEGY

What you use tends to grow and strengthen

This is the main rule from neuroscience

We can help students

strengthen their weak spots

CHAPTER NINESTOP SHAKING THE BOTTLE

THE 1ST ANGER MANAGEMENT STRATEGY

Counting to 10 is worthless if you’re carbonating your cognitions

We need more

sophisticated educational strategies

CHAPTER TENTHE CHERRY STORY

THE 2ND ANGER MANAGEMENT STRATEGY

It’s not what happens to us . . .

But what we think about what happens to us . . .

That causes us misery

SUMMARY AND CONCLUSIONS• Be careful in your judgments, because students are watching

• If you want genuine cooperation, be less threatening

• Like MCJ, use your counterconditioning mojo

• Use the power of mind to focus on your goals

• Create a school filled with respect bubbles

• Help student manage their moods

• Use collaborative storytelling

• Teach better strategies

• Stop carbonating those cognitions

• It’s not what happens to you . . . but what you think . . .