guam family magazine spring 2010

Sibling Rivalry

Coping Lessons

College Preparation

Family Night Out

and Much More!

FeaturesBig Sister 10Melissa Murano didn’t only find a surrogate big sis-ter in the Big Brothers Big Sisters program — she found a lifelong friend.

Channel Surfing 14Times may have changed, but as parents, we still need to balance technology and our children’s access to it.

DepartmentsFamilia: Guam Family Message Board 8Got birthday greetings or special events to announce? Highlight them in the Familia photo pages!

Finance: Repair Bad Money Habits 18Practice self-control for you and your children.

Parenting: Sibling Rivalry 20Get by without trying to pick sides.

Parenting: Coping Lessons 22Culture and family help children deal with loss.

Health Spot: Healthy Resolutions 25Work together with your family to keep the resolutions throughout the year.

Teen Scene: College Preparation 28A letter from a concerned parent to future college students.

Family Table: Family Night Out 31What family friendly restaurants are available out there?

Products We Love: Wallet-Friendly Activities 34Enjoy an inexpensive fun-filled weekend with your kids.

Center Stage: Striving for Gold 38Justine Denusta — a 16-year-old junior at St. Thomas Aquinas — prepares to conquer the world, first in college, then in life.

Time Out for Mommy and Daddy: Love and Marriage 40Couples reveal the secret to a long and happy life together.

Kidsville: Family Fun 44Fun and games for the kids and young at heart.

On the Cover:Melissa and her “big sister” Karly enjoy a

day at Ypao Beach Park. They met through Guam’s Big Brothers Big Sisters program.

To read more, turn to page 10Photo by Steve Hardy

3Spring 2010 guamfamily.net

PublisherStephani Ferrara

EditorFaye Varias

Assistant EditorBryan C. Sualog

ContributorsJoann Blas

Clare CamachoTheresa DatuinSteve Hardy

Sarah Leon GuerreroChristina Ann Pestanas

Marsha Postrozny

Art DirectionTaliea Designworks

ProductionTaliea Designworks

Advertising SalesStephani FerraraRayann Taitano

AdministrationTia Camacho

PrintingT&T Printing, Hong Kong

ADVERTISING [email protected]

Opinions expressed in Guam Family are not necessarily those of the publisher or our advertisers.

SEND COMMENTS TOEditor

GUAM FAMILYP.O. Box 27290

Barrigada, GU 96921E-mail: [email protected]

Tel: 671.635.7501 Fax: 671.635.7520

Web site: guamfamily.net

©2010 GUAM FAMILYAll rights reserved.

Owned by Promo Infomedia, Inc.Jerry Roberts, President

Did you know Guam Family has a Facebook Fan Page? Read what our fans are saying about us!

Great photo and article

on the Rayfields! Thanks

for sharing their

awesome journey!

— Lourdes V. Leon Guerrero

feedbackfeedback

I love the article on the

Rayfields! It was absolutely

beautiful! They’re a really

great family. Teresa is my

cousin and a wonderful

person. Shane’s been so

supportive and Zac’s just full

of personality!

— Kathrina Paulino

I truly enjoyed reading this

issue! And that fambam that

graces your front cover ...

PHENOMENAL FAMILY!

— JesCyn Barcinas

Thank you for sharing our story. There is nothing like our “Guam Family.”

— Shane and Theresa Rayfield

I am the adoptive mom of Camryn, the cover story of your most recent online

edition. THANK YOU for such a well-written and sensitively-written arti-

cle. There have been many, but this ranks as one of the best. I knew little about it, and Camryn took this on all by herself, which I am delighted about. It shows

that she really has come to terms with what happend to her and SO many others. I am very proud of her, and

for you for thinking she is worthy of not only a story but a front

page feature too.— Judi Mosely

You can become a Facebook fan too!Find us online at http://www.facebook.com/guamfamilymagazine

4 Spring 2010 guamfamily.net

feedbackfeedbackI just left the island and am missing it already! So excited that this

magazine exists and is another way to stay connected. We love Guam

and the strength and fortitude of the Chamorro people. My dad is a

native son and passed away on Guam while visiting for a couple months.

Our family here in California witnessed so much love and community

from family and new friends that supported us through these past weeks.

We understand our dad’s love for his homeland so much more through

the hearts of the familes that make up this beautiful paradise. We will

be back!

— Bob Curtice

When people ask me the question, “What do you do?” I always fumble with my answer. Most of the time, it’s because I don’t know if they’re asking me what my day job is, or what I do with my “spare” time.

So for those of you who have some “spare” time, here’s the complete answer. By trade, I am a journalist — editor, writer, amateur photographer, photo shoot stylist, layout coordinator — pretty much in all cases of the word. Through this profession, I am exposed to many trivial matters, but more importantly, I learn about many things I’ve grown to be truly passionate about.

This brought me to become involved with several non-profit and civic groups, namely, Guam Animals In Need, the Make-a-Wish Foundation, Soroptimist International of the Marianas, the Guam Young Professionals, and last but definitely not least, the Guam National Forensic League.

The National Forensic League, or NFL, is a nationwide speech and debate honor society that hands out thousands of dollars in scholarships for those who excel in forensics. Now, that’s not to be mis-taken for the CSI stuff you see on TV. Forensics in this case refers to the art of debating, and being able to stand in front of a crowd to perform and speak one’s mind.

This league was a big part of my high school career — and I’d even venture to say, my present career — and I was devastated to learn that the program was nearly non-existent when I moved back to Guam four years ago. And last year, it was axed by the Department of Education.

Through the dedication and hard work of several volunteers — coaches, judges, advisors — we were able to revive this program. This summer, the league plans to reconnect with its mainland counterparts and compete at the national tournament — something the local chapter hasn’t been able to do in nearly a decade.

Being part of these milestones is not only gratifying to those involved in the organization, but also to those that helped them reach their goals. And if you’ve ever been in those shoes, you know how great it feels.

You also know that giving to a group you’re interested in doesn’t have to involve money. It can just be an investment of yourself. This issue’s cover story is about that. Because when you invest yourself in something you feel strongly about, the satisfaction you receive cannot be measured. While it may feel great to be recognized for the good you do, knowing you made a difference is the real impact.

Turn to page 10 for what it meant for Melissa. She is the subject for this month’s cover story on Big Brothers Big Sisters. Perhaps you too can be inspired to do something you love and make a difference as well.

Happy Reading!

F a y e Va r i a sE d i t o r

Be Inspired


editor’s noteeditor’s note

familiafamilia

Happy 13th BirthdayJoshua Cepeda!

Happy 7th Birthday Napu Frank Baleto Cruz!

Happy Easter Grandma. From the entire family!

Guam

Family

Message

Board

Napu Frank Baleto Cruz!

Happy Easter

familiafamilia

Happy Birthday Tim

from your family and friends! We Love You! Wish that special someone a Happy Birthday or congratulations by e-mailing his or her photo and a message to [email protected].

Happy Birthday Mikey!

With love from the whole family!

Happy Birthday Joleen Perez! Love, Mom

Congratulations to Mike & Lyn Pangelinan on their wedding! They are pictured here with their children Brian Anthony and Iris Joy Pangelinan.

Spring 2010 guamfamily.net

S



her what I need to say. She can do it without even looking! My two teenagers have MySpace and Facebook accounts. They can download and edit videos, and compose music on the Mac. They can do some amazing things with technology. However, along with these technological leaps and bounds, comes the responsibility of ensuring that technology provides positive influences for the development of our children. Most of the technology out there for children is for entertainment, and some for education. Regardless, parents need to monitor their children’s use of technology, whether they’re toddlers or teenagers. As with any tool, it can be misused and abused. Balancing Technology There are many simple things you can do to balance technology in the home. First of all, no computers, television, or video games in the bedrooms! This “forces” children to be around the family and not use technology to escape. You are also better able to monitor your children’s

usage. When I finally broke down and installed wireless Internet, the rule was no laptops in the rooms. I need to be able to walk around and take a peek. I also need to engage them and make sure they don’t retreat into the cyber world. My other rule is no iPods on the table while eating, and only one headphone in one ear when using iPods around the house or in the car. This keeps them engaged and ensures they can hear others around them. The other helpful suggestion for parents when it comes to technology and children is talk, talk, talk, and talk. Talk to your children about the dangers of technology. Talk to them about their responsibilities when using technology. Talk to them while they’re using technology so they can stay connected with the human world. And then, talk some more. Have the big talk and then little talks in between. There is no golden rule for time limits on watching television, or playing video games. The less, the better, and days should go by when there is no television or video

games or computer usage, especially with young children. Research has shown over and over about the importance of brain development in the early years (birth to five years) and the importance of real experiences, connections with people, and hands-on activities. Overuse of technology has been linked to violent behavior, obesity, and poor academic

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performance. All parents want their children to grow up healthy, smart and successful. One easy way to work toward these goals is to unplug them from technology and plug them in to real experiences. Other Suggestions Television and videos/DVDs: There was no cable television at my house until the children were in middle school. They felt deprived and complained, but guess what, they didn’t miss much. I admit when they were younger I used videos to “babysit” my toddlers when I had to cook dinner or do some work. However, I used videos sparingly and only when essential. I hear many people say, “But Barney taught my children to count or say the alphabet.” Yes, your child may be able to sing a song, or count because they followed Barney, but they would have learned it faster and more efficiently if they were engaged with you (or another person) in a fun activity. Their brain cells would have been working harder and better. I’m not saying television or videos are bad. There are some wonderful programs out there. My issue is what children can be doing instead of watching; running around, playing games with real people, and learning how to get along and deal with conflict. Children need practice and stimulation instead of staring mindlessly at a screen. Computers: My daughter was on my lap when she was 18 months old using the computer, including the mouse and keyboard. We had “Just Gramma and Me” by Mercer Mayer on a computer disk. She would have the CD book “read” to her and then she could point and click at pictures on the page and different things would happen. A frog would jump out of the mailbox, or the wipers on the bus would go on. It was fun, improved her eye-hand coordination, and she was still engaging with mommy. Nowadays, with the popularity of the internet, the innocence of the computer is gone. So, I talk (over and over) to both children about the privacy settings on


I

parentingparenting

Sibling RivalrySibling Rivalry


“When the children calm down, remind

them of the rules, and the reasons for the rules. Be firm, consistent, and have consequences.”

— Christina D.R. Pestanas


T

Our Cultural Way of Coping

parentingparenting

Lessons


Lessons

Coping Tips

parentingparenting


Resolutions

I

health spothealth spot

Healthy


health spothealth spot

We live on a beautiful island where the sun shines practically all year long. The beach and the jungle are

calling to us!\

— Theresa Datuin


Family Night Out

family tablefamily table


family table

family tablefamily tablefamily tablefamily table


products we loveproducts we love



A

time out for mommy and daddytime out for mommy and daddy

Love and Marriage


time out for mommy and daddytime out for mommy and daddy

“Even after being married this long I can’t assume

that Pedro naturally knows my expectations and needs

and vice versa.”

— Sarah Leon Guerrero

History of the Beautiful Hibiscus


Ladybugs

Spring Fever


sneak peeksneak peek

Coming this Summer!Features: In Our Other Departments:


guam family magazine spring 2010

Documents

family fun

great family

family table

phenomenal family

family help children

family friendly restaurants

guam family message

big sister karly