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How to Be a Good Person
We live in a world in which basic values such as kindness, humility and compassion are not often
given the importance they are due. In the media, selfi sh and ar r ogant behavior patterns are often
glorified. It is also common for people to get so caught up in day-to-day responsibilities and
personal insecurities, that they lose sight of their goals for personal development. Recovering
your sense of integrity, or goodness, begins with identifying your personal values. Goodness is
the first step to success and happiness. We can often turn to religion for guidance, but ultimately
we should learn to define our own morals ourselves. One of the simplest ways to do so is to love
others, and treat them as you would like to be treated. Try to think of others before yourself. Even
doing small things daily will greatly enrich and improve your life, and the lives of others around
you. To be a good person is not easy because you have to believe in people and people you
cannot see.
1Identify what it is that being a good person means to you personally. Some
people think that being a good person is as simple as not doing harm to another, but
it is not always about what you don't do, but what you do for others. You might not be a bad
person, but are you a good person?
Who do you look up to and why? How are they making the world a better place to
live in, and how can you do the same?
What qualities do you admire in them, and how can you develop the same ones?
Keep your role model close to you, like a friendly spirit that is always at your side.
Think how they would respond to a question or circumstance, and how they would
respond in the same manner.
Think of ways that you can better embody these qualities you admire. Think of how
to apply those qualities in your work, creative pursuits, personal relationships, diet
and lifestyle.
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Try to look at the bright side of things. The Motto of the Christophers says: "It isbetter to light a single candle than it is to curse the darkness." Be that light. When you
see controversy, try to be the one who changes the subject by suggesting a solution. Don't
state what you would do, but ask everyone to get involved.
Accept everyone around you as your brothers and sisters no matter what race, age,
sexual orientation, gender identity or culture. Realize that we have feelings, and
should be treated with respect.
Don't try to correct people when they're angry by saying something irrational,
just look with compassion and remain quiet. Saying 'I understand' is usually the
wrong answer. If you say anything at all, just say, "I'm sorry you feel this way, is there
anything I can do to help?"
Stop comparing others with yourself. Try to understand that some have it better
than you in life, but at the same time, many have it much worse. When we make
ourselves miserable by comparing ourselves with others, we are wasting time and energy
that we could use in building our own inner resources. Real life is found in using our own
gifts and talents rather than over focusing on the gifts of another.
Every day, try to do an act of charity for some one else, even if it's something
small. Even reach out to people who have been cold or indifferent to you. An act of
kindness and generosity can go a long way.
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Be respectful of elderly people. Realize that you will be old some day and may
need a helping hand. Next time you go to a mall, parking lot, or anywhere, focus your
vision all around, look for an old person struggling with something, like carrying bags or
loading groceries into their car. Say, "May I help you with that?" You will be doing a great
service for seniors. Sometimes you may get one who is crabby or distrustful, and will refuse
your offer, then simply say, "I understand, and I wish you a good day." Don't give up at this
point, and keep up looking for a person that will accept your offer. Realize the elderly can
have vision, hearing, or even dementia problems, so you may need to gesture with your
hands as i f carrying or loading. Go to a park and take a brisk walk, and if you see an old
person alone, say hello with a gentle smile, and ask how they are doing, just acknowledging
someone is only proper, and can make their day. Try to imagine losing your spouse whom
you enjoyed and loved for many years, only to be left alone in the big world all by yourself.
By developing this attitude of love and understanding for the gentle things of life, like the
elderly, you be on your way to the true meaning of life and sharing, and you will become a
better person.
Be compassionate towards mentally challenged people for they are people
with feelings too, and they are brothers and sisters as well. Act as i f life is just a
chance, and you could have been born the same way, and if you were, how you would want
to be treated. They too have a sense of feeling, so give them a big smile, and show loving
compassion with your eyes. Be careful not to touch them though, because this can scare
them. If other people are around that are smiling or laughing with your interaction with them,
ignore them and keep your attention on your brother or sister that is your true friend.
Compliment friends whom you might be jealous of, and people you don't know as
well as you would like to. Giving credit where due is only respectful, and you would
want the same respect for an achievement you've accomplished.
Be a better listener than talker. Follow what the person is saying, and confirm
this with a follow up question on the topic, then they will know that you're paying
attention to them.
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Don't try to get attention by hiding or being rude when you are in an
argument with a friend, talk to them and work it out. It is best not to fight fire
with fire, perhaps suggesting that for the both of you to take some time to think it over would
be best. Be the one to succeed first. Say, "I want to resolve this with you, because you are
such a good friend. Let's take time and think this out."
Celebrate others' victories and good qualities, even when you do not feel
as blessed as they do. Many cultures and religions have heroes, martyrs, and
fables that may help individuals to find meaning and cultivate good character.
Love yourself. Practice unconditional self-acceptance. It is a lot easier to love
others, but first you have to have confidence and love yourself. You can do this by
going out in the community and offering small acts of charity, then gradually increasing thema little at a time. Do not try to do too much at once, but take it in baby steps. You will start to
be a better person when you can put a smile on someone's face and make his or her day,
and it will make yours as well. It has been said that it's in giving that we receive.
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Make it a point before you leave your house that, when you return, the
world will be a much better place to live in. It does not have to be something
big, but can be something like picking up some trash that someone threw down in a local
park, or in front of your neighbor's home.
Pray and/or meditate to help cultivate the qualities you seek to embody.
Cultivate both compassion and good karma through volunteer service.
See How to Volunteer .
Share your life and good philosophies with others. Give the young good
moral values to live by, and the importance of them. Give examples of them by
other peoples charities and yours as well. Sometimes you will feel as if your effort was in
vain, but realize that you have planted the good seed in their minds, and it may take some
time to respond to it.
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Don't be in a hurry in life, slow down and enjoy the fine and simple things
of life. Don't be in a hurry to get to the store and get back. Sit back at the steering
wheel and enjoy the scenery as you go. While in the store, notice all the fine and colorful
fruits and vegetables that are there for your nourishment, and realize that others are not as
fortunate to reap the same benefits. Buy some extra nourishing food to give to the food
bank to help feed others. Suggest to the manager there should be a food drop off
somewhere in the store for the poor.
Only use the horn in your car in an emergency, not to blow at a little old
lady or man that can barely see over the wheel. Realize that they are old and
have to take their time so they don't injure themselves or someone else. They are taking
their time and being kind, and so should you. Anger only begets anger, understand that they
may be in a hurry for something important, or they may be having car or other troubles. Even
if they are not, why add to already negative feelings?
Don't take the closest parking space at the store. Choose one further away
and figure it to be the exercise that you may need. Leave the ones close for those
that need them.
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Always insist on serving yourself the smaller portion of the food when
dining with others. Never take the biggest piece of pizza or slice of meat, for
you will appear greedy to those you are dining with.
Even doing simple things, such as smiling at someone who seems
unhappy or holding the door open for a stranger, will help you become a
better person. Soon enough, these small acts of kindness will become a habit that you
don't even have to think about.
To start your mission to become a good person, please read this list every
day and make it a part of you. Follow its guidelines and add some of yours aswell, and join in the discussion page.
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Don't try to be like somebody else; just be yourself and do good things as
simply as you can show and manage to do.
Remember to always be yourself and never who you're not. It's always good
to be a good person. But yourself is a part of you,and you must respect that.
Lose yourself in the service of other people; This is one of the keys of
happiness.will be nice to them
Do not bully. Instead, stand up for the bullied.
Remember that people will be nice to you if you are nice to them. (treat
others the way you would like to be treated)
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Show people that you respect them. People tend to mirror others' actions; if they see you
respect them, they will respect you in return.
Remember, happiness is a state of mind. The only thing in the world that we can control
is ourselves, so choose to be happy, and control yourself by purposely maintaining a
positive mental attitude.
Understand that you can be looked down on by a more popular belief. Unfortunately, that
is just human nature. However, remember that being a good person is harder than being
a bad person, so never take the easy way out. Remember to always stand for what is
right, even if it means you stand alone.
Be nice and respectful to others.
Listen to your parents, and older people, when they give you positive advice. They have
considerably more life experience, and the likelihood is they are giving you such advice
to avoid a negative experience they have had in the past. They normally have nothing but
your well-being in mind when giving this advice.
When people attempt to put you down, don't talk back or take it to heart. Instead,
laugh/shrug it off, or simply say you're sorry they feel this way. This will show you are too
smart to sink down to their level and will prevent you from being harsh, aggressive, and a
bad person. Not to mention, when they see how well you handle the situation, even your
aggressors may back off or lose their interest in insulting you.
Don't be racist. Remember, everybody is equal and everybody deserves respect and
compassion- regardless of skin, gender, physical/mental condition, or religion.
Do not lie to others, as this is lying to yourself.
Don't be judgmental.
Consider what kind of friends you would pick.
Show 10 more tips
Remember that you are still human - for as long as you live, you will have a tendency to
sometimes make mistakes; that's okay. Do the best you can, and if you occasionally
make mistakes or are not as nice as you'd like to be, just bring yourself back to focusing
on thinking of others as much as yourself
Even small changes can make an enormous and positive difference - give yourself small
goals to aim for every month or two months and focus on one or two key habits which you
Tips
Warnings
Yes I can Yes I can Yes I can Yes I can
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want to change. For example, Goal 1: I will listen to others, without interrupting at all
either verbally OR non verbally. (Think of how frustrating it can be for you when the other
person begins to move their mouth as if they are about to interject!) Goal 2: I will do my
best to think of what would make another person happy (e.g. sharing your food/drink with
others when they are hungry/thirsty, letting someone else sit where you want to sit)
Recognize that you may find it more difficult to be kind and understanding in practice
than in theory - think of the old saying "Easier said than done."
The areas of relating to others which you could most likely improve in are quite possibly
the ones which you are least willing to admit that you are wrong in; and that's exactly why
you can benefit so much from facing that you may be wrong or out of line in how you
relate to or treat others
As much as possible, seek to have a sense of humour about these things - both with
regards to the mistakes you've made and the sacrifices you anticipate you will need to
make to be nice.
Learning any new skill or practice can be challenging, especially something as central as
incorporating kindness and compassion into your overall manner with others. To make
the transition easier, be aware of the following: Jealousy is hard to overcome, try to
realize that you don't have to have fun toys or cute clothes to have popularity.
If someone asks you for help and it involves doing what they should do alone - never doit! Because that is wrong, it's cheating and it simply teaches the person you 'help'
cheating is fine.
Realise that being kind, understanding and compassionate in how you treat others is
largely the result of having a loving and caring attitude towards others - it doesn't work
very well if you are merely trying to be diplomatic. Don't adopt a policy like, "Anything for
a quiet life". Instead, learn how to empathize. "How would I feel if I were the other
person?" That way, you will be likely to act with their feelings in mind and this will show in
your words and actions. Be kind not so you look good to others, but more so others may
benefit from your selfless acts.
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 448,373 times.
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Categories: Personal Development
Recent edits by: KG Abhishek, Daniel Lindsley, Rihas Ahamed
In other languages:
Español: Cómo ser una persona que hace el bien, Português: Como Ser uma Boa
Pessoa, Français: Comment être quelqu'un de bien, Deutsch: Ein guter Mensch
sein, Русский: быть хорошим человеком, Italiano: Come Essere una Brava Persona,中
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