i want to hold your rotting hand by steve mcdonell · fade in: ext. over atlantic ocean - day a...
TRANSCRIPT
FADE IN:
EXT. OVER ATLANTIC OCEAN - DAY
A Pan-Am commercial airliner soars over the water.
SUPER - FEBRUARY 7 1964
SUPER - FIFTY MILES OUT OF NEW YORK CITY
WILLIAM(O.S.)This is William Jones fromRadio WKIP, broadcasting liveon the Beatle's jet fromEngland. We are very close tolanding at John F KennedyAirport. I'm talking to JohnLennon...
INT. JET - DAY
The other Beatles - PAUL, GEORGE and RINGO - are scatteredabout the plane, talking to different reporters. Williamgrins at JOHN.
JOHNWell, it's nice to be here, innit?
WILLIAMJohn, you must be getting veryexcited.
JOHNAye. Apparently, my meal'salmost ready.
WILLIAMHa...um, now a seriousquestion...are you and theother Beatles concerned bywhat's been happening in NewYork the last two days?
JOHNYou mean the snow?
WILLIAMNo, I'm talking about thezombie outbreak.
JOHNOh that...
WILLIAMAre you worried your showsmight be marred by disturbances?
John laughs.
2.
JOHNNo, not really. We've alwayshad disturbed people at ourgigs. Ever since the Cavern.Liverpool is full of disturbedpeople.
WILLIAMRight...so, John, what do youand the other Beatles expectto find in America?
JOHNWell, zombies, I guess.
In another seat, Ringo is being interviewed by an Englishreporter, ROGER.
ROGERRingo, we've received word thatBeatle fans are clashing withzombies at the airport as wespeak. Do you fear for yoursafety, and that of your bandmates, if the zombies getwithin biting range of you?
Ringo frowns, thinks deeply, finally...nods.
RINGONo.
Paul is making eyes at his interviewer, a pretty Americancolumnist, LINDA.
LINDAPaul, have you had a chance tosee any zombie women on TV?
PAULOh, yeah.
LINDAAnd how do think they'll be?Compared to say, English girls?
PAULWell, they're bound to be moreactive, aren't they? Able tofend for themselves. I can'twait to meet some.
LINDAWhat if they become aggressiveand try to rip your throat out?
3.
PAUL(shrugs)
Shouldn't be any different toplaying in Manchester.
George chats to an elderly Scottish newsman, KEITH.
KEITHGeorge, some of the zombieshaven't made up their mindsabout the Beatles. What do youthink about them?
GEORGEOh, I like the Beatles. They'recool.
There's a commotion from the rear of the plane. Georgestops talking, looks up, frowns. Suddenly, a young malezombie, drooling, GROWLING, smashes out of the toilet. Hecharges up the aisle. George confronts him, holds up penand paper.
GEORGE(CONT'D)Would yer like an autograph, then?
The zombie stops, grins hideously. George signs the bitof paper, hands it over. The zombie GURGLES happily, scansthe writing. George reaches under his seat, pulls out arazor sharp sword.
GEORGE(CONT'D)Works every time...
The zombie looks up, tries to duck. Too late...the swordneatly decapitates him. George steps back as the bodycrumples.
JOHNNasty bugger.
GEORGEAye, he is.
RINGOWas.
JOHNI meant you, George, yer sod.
A second zombie emerges from the toilet, rushes down theaisle. He ducks George's new swipe, charges on.
GEORGEDon't let him get to the cockpit!
John stands up, makes spastic faces. The zombie slows,giggles harshly. A HOSTESS appears with a food tray.
4.
HOSTESSTea, anyone? Oh...
The zombie grabs her, sends the tray CLATTERING. He feedson her neck, chomps viciously. Blood spurts onto thesurrounding seats.
JOHNLeave her alone, you fiend!
HOSTESSOh, Mr.Lennon...
JOHNCall me John.
HOSTESSJohn...I'm a huge fan. I haveall your albums.
JOHNWe've only made two.
HOSTESSWell, you know...
She slumps forward as the zombie lets her go. The swordwhistles over her to take off the zombie's head. Paulwields the sword this time.
JOHNSo, does your ability withsharp objects run in the family?
PAULOh, sure. Me Dad was a championfencer.
RINGOOlympics?
PAULNo, Merseyside Fences. Didlovely work with barbed wire.
Suddenly, the hostess springs up, GROWLING, already a zombie.
GEORGEMust be the altitude.
The hostess lurches towards the cockpit, just as the dooropens. The boys are helpless They watch as the door slamsshut, locks.
RINGOOh, dear...time to buckle up.It's gonna be a rough landing.
5.
SCREAMS and RIPPING sounds are heard over the intercom.
INT. AIRPORT TERMINAL - DAY
Utter chaos...thousands of Beatle fans clash with hundredsof zombies. POLICE OFFICERS try to help but their numbersare dwindling. Humans are being bitten, turning intozombies enmasse.
COP 1Have the Beatles arrived?
COP 2Landing now. Thank Christ we'vegot the zombies isolated.
He peers out to the tarmac, through huge plateglass windows.
COP 3For now...
COP 4Is that jet gonna stop?
They all watch as the Beatles jet heads towards theterminal. It's still moving quite fast. At the last minuteit pulls up, feet from the glass.
The zombie hostess flies through the windscreen, throughthe windows, into the terminal. A REPORTER runs up with amicrophone.
REPORTERWhich one are you? Ringo?
The hostess rips his throat out. The cops open fire, blowher head to pieces.
The fans break through the barriers, flood into thearrival lounge. Outside, the door of the jet opens. TheBeatles emerge, waving, smiling. A TV crew starts filming.The NEWSMAN fronts the camera.
NEWSMAN...and the Beatles have arrivedon infected American soil.Despite some minor skirmishesin the terminal, everything iscalm, with little trouble. Ican see__
The zombie reporter jumps on him, gnaws into his chest.The screen goes black.
6.
SOUND MAN(O.S.)Ok, cut to a commercial...NOW!
(clears throat)And now a word from oursponsors...
INT. BEDROOM - DAY
a teenage boy sits on his bed, glum, shaking his head. Atthe window, zombies snarl and drool. A small TV shows theBeatles onstage.
AD MAN(V.O.)YEAH, YEAH,YEAH...we know whatit's like! Your friends haveall got tickets to see theBeatles, but you're barricadedin your house. Those zombies, huh?
The boy looks around, frowns...nods.
AD MAN(V.O.)Well, son, we can change allthat! You need the...
(drum roll)...all new Paul McCartneysignature Hofner bass chainsaw!
ZING!! The boy suddenly has a guitar strapped on. The bodyis the classic Hofner violin shape but the neck ends in asmall spiked wheel. He flicks a switch, plucks the strings.The saw WHIRRS into life viciously.
AD MAN(V.O.)After a brief tutorial, you'llbe carving a swathe through thezombie hordes in no time!
The boy runs to the window, smashes the saw through it.He slices into the zombies, heads tearing, limbs removed.
AD MAN(V.O.)As an added bonus, you canlearn the bass lines of five,yes, count 'em folks, FIVEBeatle songs. Powered by abattery pack that lasts twelvehours, you'll have more thanenough time to fight your wayacross the city to Manhattan.Imagine it...
MONTAGE - DREAM SEQUENCE
The boy runs along ravaged streets, killing zombies by thedozen. Beatle songs play in the background.
7.
Teenage girls follow the boy, professing their love forhim. He laughs, continues to dissect zombies.
At last the boy is outside a theatre. A sign reads THE EDSULLIVAN SHOW PRESENTS - THE BEATLES. Girls fall at hisfeet sobbing as he holds the guitar aloft in triumph.
END MONTAGE - DREAM SEQUENCE
The boys stands in his room again, the guitar gone.
AD MAN(V.O.)Call us now on 1-700-BEATLE.At only forty four ninety fiveit's a steal. And for ourcustomers who call in the nexttwenty minutes, we'll throw ina free plectrum cyanide capsule.For the unlikely scenario thatthings just don't work out...
The boy dials the number on a phone, talks excitedly.
AD MAN(V.O.)After ordering your Hofner basschainsaw, please proceed toyour rooftop. Our delivery menwill airdrop your purchase to you.
The boy gives the zombies at the window the finger. Heheads out the door...
AD MAN(V.O.)(speaks fast)
Please note that Hofner takesno responsibility for misuseof product. Hofner chainsawguitars are made from highquality materials, but overexuberant treatment and foolishbravado may result in customersunderestimating the size of thezombie army. Thank you and goodhunting.
(beat)And now its back to JFK, forthe Beatle's first pressconference...
INT. AIRPORT LOUNGE - DAY
The Beatles stand behind a table, facing the dozens ofmedia people. Camera flash, as the police barricade thedoors. THUMPS, SCREAMS and TEARING sounds from outside...
COP 1We can't hold them for muchlonger!
8.
COP 2The zombies or the Beatle fans?
COP 1Both!
The media bombard the lads with questions.
REPORTER 1What is the secret of yoursuccess?
JOHNWe're not zombies.
PAULYet.
REPORTER 2What is the biggest threat toyour career - dandruff or zombies?
RINGOZombies...we've already gotdandruff.
REPORTER 3Will the zombie outbreak affectyour future music?
GEORGEOnly if they catch us.
REPORTER 4Is it true you re-recorded somesongs for the zombie market?
PAULYeah. We did 'Love Me Drool',Not A Second Life', and HoldMe Tight, I'm Decaying'.
REPORTER 5You've been described as Elvismixed with four zombies.
RINGOIt's not true!
(does zombie walk)Ooooaargh...
REPORTER 6Some people believe the zombievirus is linked to yourpublicity department. Is it alla hoax?
9.
The cops at the door YELL. The wood splinters, zombiecrash in, Beatle fans mingled with them. Reporter five hashis head ripped off.
JOHNOh yeah, it's a hoax! That wasreal fake, yer nob!
COP 4Quick, protect the Beatles! Getthem out to the car.
The lads duck into the fray, wielding their swords.
EXT. AIRPORT - DAY
A limo waits at the front entrance. Cops surround it,fighting off zombies and Beatle fans. The Beatles race out,hacking at the undead. They climb into the limo. It speedsoff. Zombies fling themselves at it, getting crushed inthe process.
INT. LIMO - DAY
The boys laugh as zombie parts fly off the car. The DRIVERis dressed immaculately - uniform, peaked hat.
PAULWow, this is our best receptionyet!
JOHNIt's our Beatle charisma. Itbrings together all manner offestering classes.
GEORGEAlways taking it down to yourlevel, aren't yer?
RINGOIf this was a horror film, ourdriver would be a zombie.
The driver turns his head...yes, his face is a ruined mess.The flesh is rotted through, showing black teeth.
DRIVERGaaarrr...
PAULOh, great...
GEORGESounds like he's from Cleveland...
JOHNI've had enough of this.
10.
He leans forward, clips the zombie's head.
JOHN(CONT'D)Concentrate on the road. Whatwould your mother think?
The driver seems to consider this. Nods his foul headslowly. Turns back to the wheel.
RINGOAlways had a way with theundead? Family tradition?
JOHNAye. Me mum used to regale mewith tales of battling ravenousblood suckers and parasites.
PAULLiverpool cemetery?
JOHNNo. Christmas Day lunch withthe rellies.
LATER
The limo pulls up outside the Plaza Hotel. A huge policecordon hustle the boys in. Fans SCREAM and fight lonezombies. A group of diehards sit on the pavement acrossthe street. Two young girls, RITA and LUCY, chat to anelderly ZOMBIE GRANNY...
ZOMBIE GRANNYWell, yes, I look like a zombiebut I don't have theirmurderous nature. I was onlyhalf bitten last week. Mind you,I tore the brains out of himstill.
She smiles as she knits. Despite her facial horrors, itcomes over as friendly.
RITAI think it's wonderful you'rehere to see the Beatles.
ZOMBIE GRANNYOh, I wouldn't miss it. Lovedthem right from the start. Niceboys. If I was fifty yearsyounger...
LUCYWell, now you're a zombie, yourlifespan will be much longer.
11.
RITAUnless someone...
ZOMBIE GRANNY...decapitates me? It's ok,dear, you can say it.
LUCYIs your husband still...alive?
ZOMBIE GRANNYOh, yes. Last I saw of him wasyesterday. He was heading toQueens with his friends frombingo. Said he'd always wantedto wipe out an entire suburb.
She laughs quietly.
RITASo he was a zombie?
ZOMBIE GRANNYOh, sure. There, I'm done.
She holds her knitting project. It's a sweater, with 'ILOVE THE BEATLES' embroidered on it. The girls frown,glance at each other.
RITAUm, i don't mean to be rude,but...
LUCY...but you've only knitted onesleeve on it.
The zombie granny blinks - pus drips from one eye - thengiggles.
ZOMBIE GRANNYWell, fancy that! Silly old me.
(beat)Oh, that's easily fixed.
She grabs her left arm with the other, starts pulling. ATEARING sound as her arm rips away from her shoulder. Thegirls watch with interest. The old zombie tosses the armaside.
ZOMBIE GRANNY(CONT'D)There we go...ready to wear.
Lucy CLAPS her hands. Rita high-fives the zombie granny'sremaining hand.
12.
LUCYYou zombies are so selfsufficent, so...adaptive! Wehumans can learn from you.
RITAThat's right. The people whoare giving the zombies badpress should just...well, theyshould__
SCREAMS from around them. Fans point up to the hotel.
ZOMBIE GRANNYOh, there they are! The tenthfloor, oh my...
INT. HOTEL ROOM - DAY
The Beatles wave out of the windows. On the other side ofthe city, smoke and flames are visible.
RINGOSo this is New York. They'reall crazy.
PAULWhen in Rome...
JOHN...act like a Roman zombie?
GEORGEYer all soft in the head.
The Beatle's manager, BRIAN EPSTEIN, hurries in.
BRIANBoys! Thank heavens you're safe.I got stuck at the airport. Itwas horrific!
RINGOAye, them zombies are tenaciousbuggers.
BRIANZombies? I'm talking about thelocal businessmen! All over melike fleas trying to make moneyoff your name. Parasites...
JOHNAnd naturally, you did makemoney for us from these parasites?
There is a SCRATCHING sound at the windows. George wandersover to the heavy drapes.
13.
BRIANOf course!
He opens up his briefcase, produces a doll. Its dressedlike a Beatle, with a zombie head. A left handed bass isattached to the body.
BRIAN(CONT'D)Zombeatles...these will sellby the thousands. Maybemillions...
PAULHere! Is that meant to be me?
He takes it from Brian, indignant. Examines it.
JOHNSpitting image of you, son.
PAULSpitting alright...that's realdrool, yech!
BRIAN(excited)
Oh, yes, completely lifelike.The Ringo doll is filled withmaggots.
RINGOThat'd be right. The drummeralways get kicked when he's down.
The SCRATCHING gets louder. George frowns.
JOHNWell, you've earned it, haven'tyou...ah, I wouldn't do that,laddie.
George opens the drapes.
GEORGEWhy?
Zombies cover the windows outside! They hang offdrainpipes and cleaning platforms. Some just stick to theglass via body fluids. Beatle fans and undead are mixedtogether. The windows CRACK...
PAULWhere's the bloody police whenyou need them?
The windows SHATTER! Dozens of zombies and fans crash intothe room. A couple of zombie cops snarl at the boys.
14.
JOHNThere's the police. Stopcomplaining and RUN!
BRIANOh, dear. Everyone to the roof!I have a helicopter waiting.
GEORGEDoes being prepared for allcontingencies run in yer familythen, Brian?
BRIANNot really. I'm a gayjew...we're always organised.
They all run to the door except Ringo. He holds thezombeatle doll up in the air. Everyone in the roomstops...silence. The zombies gaze in awe at the object.
GEORGEYou seem to have tamed thesavage beast with your toy.
JOHNDoes that run in your family,Ring? Soothing wild creatures?
RINGOAye. Me granddad was an animaltamer.
PAULLiverpool Circus?
RINGONo...my nan's pension chequeday.She was a right nutter forthe pub.
He hurls the doll at the zombies. The spell is broken.
GEORGETo the roof!
JOHNI'll second that.
PAULI'll third that.
RINGOI'll fourth__
JOHNShurrup! Jokes finished.
15.
They rush out of the room. The zombies and fans followclose behind. However, two female FANS stay and look about.
FAN 1Wow, we're really here..theBeatles hotel room.
FAN 2Yeah. Too bad we misssed them.
FAN 1Should we go up to the roof?
FAN 2No, let's stay here. TheBeatles will be back at somestage.
FAN 1But I heard on the radio thezombies could take over thewhole world.
Fan 2 is examining the table. She triumphantly holds up achewed piece of toast.
FAN 2Oh, I feel faint...one ofthem...ate this!
They both SIGH, long and hard, before sharing the toast.
FAN 1Who cares about zombies...
EXT. HOTEL ROOF - DAY
The Beatles and Brian emerge from the stairwell. Aroundthem, New York City is chaotic. Zombies teem in thestreets. cover the buildings. The lads sprint to thechopper, a small Bell Huey.
RINGOIf this were a movie__
GEORGEYeah, we know...the pilot wouldbe a zombie.
Brian opens the side door. The chopper PILOT turns fromthe controls.
PILOTHi guys! Action aplenty. Let's go!
BRIANThank__aargh, aargh!
16.
JOHNWhat's wrong?
BRIANThe pilot...the pilot's a zombie!
RINGOTold you...
Sure enough, the pilot's face is covered in festeringsores. Rotting teeth grimace out of a hideous mouth. Atthe stairwell, the first wave of zombies and fans burstout, SHRIEKING.
PAULLooks like our fabled careeris over, lads.
RINGOTwo years is hardly a 'fabledcareer'.
PILOTI'm not a zombie! Hurry, get in!
BRIANI...you're not?
PILOTNo! This is my natural look!Honest! Now, COME ON!
The Beatles and Brian clamber in. The chopper rises, justas the pursuers reach it. A zombie launches himself at thechopper, bit is sliced into chunks by the rotor blades.
GEORGEHa! Chopped up by a chopper!
INT. CHOPPER - DAY
The Beatles watch as the rooftop fills with the undead.The streets below are a heaving mass of zombies and fans.John chats to the pilot.
JOHNIt must be hard for you.
PILOTNo, not really. I just pullback on this stick, the choppergoes up...
JOHNI meant going through life sohideously revolting.
The pilot shrugs.
17.
PILOTNah, it was ok. I was one ofthe better looking people inCleveland.
PAULStill, its, well, it justdoesn't seem fair.
GEORGEOoh, Mr. Sensitive...
BRIANI suppose you've been safe fromthe zombies? You could blend in.
PILOTTrue! That's what my betterhalf said!
The boys wince.
RINGOYou have a wife?
PILOT(laughs)
No, a husband.(beat)
I'm actually a woman.
JOHNOuch...
A silence as even the wisecracking Beatles are stumped.
PAULWe're sorry...ma'am?
PILOTHey, I'm used to it. Besides,my husband recently became azombie. So our relationship hasstrengthened.
BRIANI imagine the dinnerconversation is interesting.
PILOTSure is...now, we off to theEd Sullivan show? The theatre?
RINGOOur show tonight! I'd almostforgotten about it.
18.
PAULCan we still do it? The zombies...
JOHNHey, we're the Beatles! Where'sthat old Liverpool spirit?
GEORGEYeah! We aren't letting someugly, decaying filth stop us.
(beat)No slight intended on presentcompany.
PILOTNone taken! I'll radio ahead.
LATER
The chopper sets down on the Capitol Theatre building roof.Armed soldiers escort the Beatles to the stairs.
BRIANMr. Sullivan hired the bestpeople to protect you.
A gang of zombies appears, smashing into the soldiers. Itscarnage...in seconds, the army guys are ripped apart.
JOHNObviously he picked the lowestbidder....run, lads!!
INT. STUDIO - LATE AFTERNOON
Cameramen and crew hurry around the studio. The audienceseats are filling, teenagers, adults and a few zombies.ED SULLIVAN gives orders. He shakes his head as theBeatles appear.
EDYou're twenty minutes late!What sort of operation are yourunning, Epstein?
BRIANI'm terribly sorry, Mr.Sullivan. It won't happen again.
JOHNWon't happen__we've just foughtour way through the zombieapocalypse! Of course we're late!
PAULYeah! Lucky to be here at all.
19.
EDWell, you obviously havedifferent standards in Britain.Here, you turn up no matter what.
George has been snooping around the studio. Now he seesEd for the first time.
GEORGEAaagh! They're here...a zombie,aargh...
John SLAPS him hard. Takes him to one side.
JOHN(low voice)
Ed always looks like that. He'snot a zombie. Be subtle.
(beat)An arsehole maybe, but not azombie.
GEORGEI...alright. But, look at him...
He shivers.
RINGO(murmurs)
Maybe he's related to thechopper pilot...
EDYou've got ten minutes till theshow goes live. Please get yourgear ready!
He storms off to the side.
PAULWhy are there zombies in thecrowd?
BRIANTo fill the seats. There justaren't enough humans left alive.
JOHNSo this could be our last evergig, lads.
PAULThat's right! Let's give themthe greatest experience oftheir lives.
In the background, zombies are biting humans, crating morezombies.
20.
GEORGEWho, the zombies?
PAULno, yer daft sod. The audience.
RINGO...who are all now zombies.
The cameramen are all zombies. The entire studio, exceptfor the Beatles, Brian and ED, is a haven for the zombiehorde. The lads strap on their guitars. Ringo gets behindhis kit.
BRIANBut why aren't they attacking us?
Ed sweeps in.
EDBecause they aren't sobrainless as to spoil MY show.
(beat)Ok, we're going live in three,two, one...ladies and gentlemen,I've dispensed with the usualshow intro, to cut straight tothe chase. In a week of extremeevents, tonight, live here inthe studio, these four talentedyoung men from Liverpool,England, will create anothergolden chapter in televisionhistory.
The zombies in the seats get restless.
ZOMBIE 1Gaaar...phffftt, get on withit. Raaarggg...
ZOMBIE 2Sssh! Why do we have to beshown as talking funny? It'snot true for some of us at all!I have perfectly good controlof my motor function cortexstem. My vocabulary is totallyunaffected as you can see.
Suddenly, one of his arms falls off. His shirt rips openas his chest caves in with rot. A great SQUELCH from histattered pants.
21.
ZOMBIE 2(CONT'D)(sighs)
Of course, I have absolutelyno control from the lower braindown...
ZOMBIE 1Raar...snarl...gibber...youalways were a dick, Stan. Evenbefore you converted.
Ed pulls out a telegram.
EDBefore the Beatles perform, Ireceived a telegram from ElvisPresley himself. Unfortunately,the king of rock and roll isnow a zombie. But he stillwishes the Beatles a safe, andsuccessful time here in the U.S.I'll read it out.
(beat)'Congratulations to theBeatles...gaaargh...Love MeTender...drool...enjoyabletrip...riiii...HeartbreakHotel...love Elvis Presley'.
RINGOWow, Elvis a zombie? Who'd ofthought?
GEORGE(shrugs)
He's been making horror moviesfor years.
EDLadies and gentlemen...theBeatles!
The boys start playing 'All My loving'. The zombieaudience sit still, but not for long. They jump and swarmtowards the Beatles. It doesn't look good. Suddenly, Johnstops playing, gives a loud WHISTLE. Five scruffylonghaired MEN run out from backstage.
EDGod, now what? More zombies?These are disgusting!
JOHNNo, Eddie baby, these arefriends our ours. I took theliberty of arranging a littleback up before we flew over.
(MORE)
22.
JOHN (CONT'D)Meet the Rolling Stones! Heyup, lads.
The Stones take over the Beatles instruments, and startplaying. It's a rough, edgy SOUND. The zombies pause,confused. Some start to WAIL and HOWL, covering their ears.
PAULIt's working! The Stones musicis great but can cause immensedamage to the unprepared.
EDYou're not wrong! It'sunbearable. I almost feel sorryfor the zombies.
He runs off. The Beatles sprint to the cameras, zoom inon the Stones performance. Zombies flail and hide asMICK's lips fill the screens.
JOHNThese images beamed around thecountry will stop any zombie.
Indeed, the zombies are curling up to die. Some explodein sheer frustration and anguish.
RINGO(frowns)
John, you sure this is a goodthing? What if the Stonesbecome bigger than us? We'llbe out of a job.
GEORGENay, Ringo, have faith. Normalhumans won't go crazy over them.
(beat)Well, maybe in Cleveland andother cesspits...
John shakes Mick's hand.
JOHNWell done, lads. I knew youcould do it.
MICKNo worries, John. Glad to help.We didn't realise the zombieproblem was so big over here.Actually, some of them lookedlike our fans back home...
PAULOk, now what?
23.
JOHNParty back at the hotel.Brian's shout.
(beat)Brian? Where's he gone, then?
GEORGEProbably hiding with Ed somewhere.
Ringo opens his mouth to speak. John leaps to put a handon his face.
JOHNDon't even think about it, son.We've seen enough horror today.
INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT
John sits beside a bed, with a large storybook. Shapes aremoving under the covers.
JOHN...and so, the free world wassaved from the zombie threat,thanks to the Beatles.
He closes the book. GIGGLING from the bed.
JOHN(CONT'D)And now it's time for littleBeatles to go to sleep. We havea big tour coming up tomorrow,touring the Far East Australiaand New Zealand.
Paul pops his head out.
PAULDid everyone live happily everafter, Mr. Lennon?
JOHNAye, laddie, we all did.
George pops his head out.
GEORGEWhat about the chopper pilot?
JOHNYes, even him, uh, her...Ringo,come on, son.
Ringo pops his head out. He's a zombie...
JOHN(CONT'D)Take the mask off and settle down.
24.
RINGOIt's not a mask! I was bittenby a fan yesterday.
He leaps at the camera, spraying drool and bits of flesh.FREEZE FRAME.
BLACK
JOHN(O.S.)Bloody drummers...always letyou down, don't they?
'I Want To Hold Your Hand' plays.
END